


Including the Thorns

by Cass223



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Autofellatio, Bigotry & Prejudice, Blow Jobs, Fantasizing, Fights, First Time Blow Jobs, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, Marching Band, Mechanic Dean Winchester, Musicals, Musician Dean Winchester, Name-Calling, Past Drug Addiction, Past Rape/Non-con, Slow Burn, Slurs, Tags Contain Spoilers, Tags May Change, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-20
Packaged: 2019-03-25 21:43:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 55
Words: 269,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13843617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cass223/pseuds/Cass223
Summary: Life is a bed of roses. What they fail to mention is that it includes the thorns.Escaping the demons of your past is never easy, especially when you have to see them every day.When Castiel's senior year started, he thought it was going to go according to plan. He knew which college he wanted to attend. He knew which activities he was going to be taking part in. He didn't expect a wink and a smile of a mystery man to turn his entire world upside down.After disappearing for four months, Dean was thoroughly aware that he had something to prove. He had overcome his addiction and was starting his new job as a student teacher at his alma mater. It was there that he was met by the steady gaze of gorgeous blue eyes. At that moment, he knew his life was changed.CHAPTER UPDATES EVERY WEDNESDAY!!!





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, I would like to thank TheShyGirl for being my beta! The girl is a godsend! Thank you for making me a better writer!  
> This fic is very loosely based on my high school experience. Yes, I have been to band camp. No, we did not do what Alysson Hannigan said in American Pie. Hofstra is real. A lot of the places I mention are very real. I will never mention the high school name. If you're from the area or you do a little bit of searching, you'll figure it out.  
> Some of the stuff actually happened to me. Some of it happened to others that I knew in high school. Some of it is pure fiction.  
> Dean's character is semi-based on one of my teachers in high school. The man tortured me for three years of my life, but you write what you know.  
> I hope you all enjoy :)

_“It was the heat of the moment.”_

Castiel watched as his cell phone’s screen lit up and displayed the alarm he’d set the night before. _Six o’clock._ He hated being up this early. Slowly, he reached over and turned off the alarm. “God, I don’t want to get up.”

It was Castiel’s first day of senior year. He had been tossing and turning all night. Castiel never hated school, he always did well without trying, but this year was different. Besides band camp during the last week of August, he spent most of his summer just working at the library and doing community service trying to build up his college resume. He wasn’t planning on going to an Ivy League college, but he did want to go to one of the state schools nearby, and there was a lot of competition. SUNY Stony Brook was, after all, one of the best schools in the world, literally.

He dragged himself out of bed and tiptoed to the bathroom. His older brother, Gabriel, was still asleep in his room across from the toilet and he didn’t want to inconvenience him with this time of day as well.

He shut the door quietly and turned on the water, then stepped in while it was still at hypothermic temperatures and screamed. _Well, there goes trying to be quiet._ Castiel prayed that his brother wouldn’t come in and beat the life out of him. _At least I wouldn’t have to go to school_ , he thought, then chuckled at the notion.

He waited for a moment, anticipating the attack. After a few minutes, he decided it was probably safe to start washing.

Castiel always enjoyed his morning showers. They served two purposes. One, they woke him up, which it definitely did a good job of this morning. Two, it always had a way of calming him down, and he needed that today. He started humming while he rinsed the suds from his hair. By the time he was cleaning his body, he was full on singing “Telling you what my heart meant…”

The door slammed open. “Holy fuck, Cassie!!! I swear to God, I’m going to kill you!!! Do you realize what time it is?”

“Sorry, Bro,” Castiel answered mockingly.

“Don’t give me that, you little shit! I was up until late studying for my exam that’s at one o‘clock. That’s one pm, Cassie, not six a.m., you sadistic ass!”

Castiel chuckled as he shut off the water, then took the towel off of the rack. He poked his head out from behind the shower curtain. “You know I can’t help myself! Once the song is in my head, I have to sing it.”

“Well, can you do it at a more reasonable hour? Like, maybe around, I don’t know, one p.m.? What are you doing up early anyway?” Gabriel asked while leaning his back up against the sink.

“It’s the first day of school. You know this. Now, Gabe, would you mind leaving me alone so I can finish getting ready? I still have to eat breakfast before the bus gets here at 6:45.” Castiel wrapped the towel around his waist and stepped out of the shower.

“Fine!” Gabriel groaned. “But don’t try to pull this shit again tomorrow. I have to work late tonight, okay?”

“I swear,” he promised while crossing over his heart.

“Little shit, waking me up at 6:15 in the fucking morning! What the hell…” Gabriel muttered as he went back to his room and slammed the door.

Castiel looked in the mirror and did his usual. _Oh, dear God, do I really look like this?_ examination. He wasn’t ugly. He just never honestly felt comfortable in his skin. He had dark brown, almost black, hair which never went in any other direction but up. He tried to tame it, but it had a mind of its own. He hit his growth spurt last year, so he still felt like he was too clumsy to function. Thankfully, he switched from glasses to contacts because, by that point, overall he felt like and looked like a nerd. Almost like a junior tax accountant. At least, he thought he did.

Everyone told him his eyes were one of his best features. They were a bright electric blue. His best friend, Charlie, told him they remind her of the water at Smith’s Point. He loved Charlie, but he was pretty sure her quirkiness bordered on insanity. Be that as it may, he always tried to accent the color of his eyes with one of his many t-shirts. Why not use his supposed best feature to his advantage, right? So, he chose his navy blue Sgt. Pepper shirt, his new jeans, and a pair of Chucks.

After trying to tame his hair for the tenth time, he put in his contacts, he gave himself one last once-over, then decided to make his way upstairs to the kitchen for breakfast.

His mom, Becky, was already awake taking care of his little sister, Hannah. She was five and a handful. With sleep still in her eyes, his mom turned to him and yawned. “Hey, sweetie! Are you excited for your first day?”

“Mehhhh,” was the only thing Castiel managed to say.

“That excited, huh?” she asked sardonically.

Hannah ran into Castiel’s legs, begging to be picked up and hugged. Castiel couldn’t say no to the cute pout he was getting, so he picked her up and squeezed her tight. While holding her, he turned to his mom. “I’m just nervous about the workload. I have five AP courses and College Italian. Not to mention Concert Choir, Honor Band, and Music Theory,” he stated.

His mom shook her head and handed Castiel a banana. “Well, talk to Ms. Mills. See if maybe you can drop a course.”

Castiel’s jaw dropped, and he put Hannah down. “Are you friggin kidding me? I am not dropping any of my courses!”

“Well, why don’t you drop one of your music courses? You’re always taking so many of those,” his mom said while watching the scrambled eggs she was cooking on the stove.

“I love those classes. You know I can’t drop any of them! Plus, Concert Choir and Honor Band take up only one period because they alternate on A and B days.”

“I don’t know what to tell you, Hun. All I can say is see how you feel after today and make your decision from there.” She transferred the eggs to the plate, handed them to Castiel, and kissed him on the cheek. “Now, hurry up and eat or you’re going to miss the bus. Hannah, what do you want for breakfast before I take you to school?”

“Oatmeal!!!!” she screamed.

Castiel heard a muffled “Son of a bitch!” from the downstairs. _I guess Gabriel isn’t sleeping today._  He snickered and dug into his eggs.

 

>>>>>>

 

“Sammy, it’s 6:10, man. I wanna be there by 6:30. You coming with me or taking the bus?” Dean yelled as he packed up his guitar, then grabbed his staff book. _Might as well get some songwriting done._ Sam came out of his room rubbing his eyes; his shoulder-length brown hair was a mess. Dean turned to him with a laugh. “I’m tellin ya, give me five minutes with some clippers...”

“Haha, very funny.” He ran his fingers through his hair; instantly every strand was in place. “I’ll take the bus. I was up late putting some finishing touches on my AP US History project. I’m obviously **far** from ready for school,” he said as he motioned his hands towards himself.

Dean shook his head at his little brother and smiled. He was far from stupid, but he was always jealous of his brother’s work ethic and superior intellect. “Are you meeting Kevin after school? I have Marching Band, so I won’t be able to take you home right away.”

“Yeah. I’m going to his house after school. Bobby said he’d come and get me when he’s done at the shop.” Sam yawned as he added an unhealthy amount of sugar into his morning coffee.

“Are you eating dinner there?” Dean asked as he grimaced at the sinfully disgusting drink Sam was now bringing to his lips.

Sam smacked his lips and hummed after his first sip. “No, Bobby told me he’s gonna take me to the diner to get some burgers. You gonna meet us there?” 

Dean felt sick watching his brother happily gulp down his morning coffee, but answered him quickly. “No, I’ll be here when you get home though. Everyone is coming over for a quick jam session,” he gushed with a massive smile on his face. He couldn’t wait to see everyone. It had been a long time since his band rehearsed. Then again, it had been a long time since he had done a lot of things.

The only reasons why he was able to get this gig at his old high school as a student teacher and TA for the first half of the year was because Ellen was the head of the music department and Rufus owed Bobby a favor. Luckily enough, Vice Principal Crowley always seemed to have a soft spot for Dean, too, so he was more than happy to welcome Dean back into the halls of his alma mater. Dean was glad to be given his second chance. Dean knew he didn’t deserve it, but he was going to work hard to make up for the bad decisions he had been making. Namely, Lily and the beautiful fucked up euphoria she brought into his life.

He was happy Lily was no longer in the picture. Of course, he wasn’t proud of the horrible things he had been doing to himself and his family. He could try to lie to himself, but the sex and drugs were worth it. At least, at the time he thought it was. _I can change, right?_

“Make sure you bring a burger and a slice of pie home for me,” he mentioned while he searched for his keys.

“Ok. Are we still having lunch together? I have it during the sixth period. Kevin isn’t going to have lunch with me until the second semester, and Alicia is only going to be with me every other day. I don’t want to eat by myself like a loser,” he reminded Dean as he started to eat the cantaloupe he had grabbed from the fridge.

“Well, you kinda are a loser, so that’s gonna be hard.” He ducked and gracefully avoided, the plastic cup Sam threw at him. He chuckled. “I’m kidding! I have to meet with Mick and Rufus quickly, but I’ll meet you at Ellen’s office. She said she made more of that pulled pork shit she made the other night, so I’m not missing out on that!” His mouth was already watering.

“I’m bringing a cobb salad with me to school, so I’ll be set.” Sam took a large bite of cantaloupe and smiled at Dean.

“Well, more for me. Not all of us can live off of rabbit food as you do.” He grabbed his guitar case, then put his staff book and keys in the other hand. When he got the door, he turned to Sam “Seriously, man, don’t forget the pie again.”

“I never forget the pie.” He gave Dean his signature bitch face.

“Uh-huh, if you say so. Later, bitch.” He slammed the door behind him. He could hear Sam’s muffled scream through the door telling him he’s a jerk. He made his way out to his car. “Hey, Baby, how ya doing this morning, sweetheart?” He opened the trunk of his labor of love, then put in his guitar case. After it was closed, he put both of his hands on the trunk and closed his eyes. “I’m nervous as fuck about today.” He loved his Impala. The way the black paint gleamed in the morning sun. The purr of her engine. She was a part of him. They’d been through a lot together. She was his roof when he needed one. She was his freedom. She was his home. The one constant in his life besides Sam and Bobby. He shook his head, then looked at his watch. 6:20 am. _Nut up, Winchester. Don’t be a pussy. You’ve got places to be._ He pulled out of his driveway, then turned on to Johnson Avenue to make his way to the High School.

The ride to the school never did take too long. Luckily, Dean didn’t live far from it, so hitting morning traffic was never a problem. He pulled into a spot close to the band room at 6:32 a.m. Thankfully, Dean would still have time to make a quick stop in the auditorium before he had to check in with Mick and Rufus at a little after seven o'clock. With guitar case in hand, he made his way towards the school. Unfortunately, Dean didn’t have keys to get in, but he knew if he knocked a few times Ellen’s office was close enough so that she would open the door for him. After banging on the door a few times, he saw Ellen come out of her office through the glass of the side door.

She opened the door with a smile. “What are you doing here so early? You know you don’t have to be here until seven, right?” She gave him a once-over with a reprimanding expression. “Is that seriously what you‘re wearing on your first day?”

Dean looked down at his Led Zeppelin shirt and jeans. “Mick said he didn’t care what I wear as long as I do my job. Rufus was indifferent all together as per usual, so yeah, this is what I’m wearing.” He knew he was a smart ass. “And, yeah, I know. I was kind of hoping to get some time in the auditorium under the spotlight. You know, for old times sake. Can I borrow the keys to the lighting booth? I’ll bring them back to you before the warning bell.” He shot her with the most dashing smile he could muster.

She took the metal carabiner holding her keys off of her belt loop, then handed them to him. “You’re lucky I love you.” She gave him a big grin. “You better bring them back before the warning bell.”

“I promise,” he vowed with all sincerity. “I won’t fuck up.”

“I know, honey.” She gave him a sad smile. He had to make up for a lot of shit, but he knew she was going to give him the benefit of the doubt.

He fussed with the keys for a bit, softly tossing them in his right hand. He gave her one final small smile before he made his way to the side doors of the auditorium. When he got on the stage, he put his guitar case down before he ran to the lighting booth. He unlocked the door and turned on the light before he took the stairs two at a time to quickly turn on the spotlight. The lighting booth had to stay locked on a constant basis because of the amount of fucking the stage crew and actors were known to do. Little did Ellen know, the lighting booth wasn’t the only place people liked to fuck. The lock was broken to the room they called “The Swamp” backstage. The couch in there had seen more than its fair share of underage sexual escapades. Dean being one of the students who had tainted that room on more than one occasion. _Ahhh, high school._

He ran back down the stairs and climbed onto the stage. He grabbed a chair, then sat at the edge with his guitar splayed over his lap. Dean had spent plenty of time on this stage during his high school career. He was in every musical, every play, every concert, and talent show the school had to offer. Music was his life. No matter how much he fucked up, music was his passion. That would never change.

He let his fingers strum over the guitar strings a few times before he decided on which song to play. “When you were here before, couldn’t look you in the eye. You’re just like an angel. Your skin makes me cry.” A little depressing, but he didn’t care. “You float like a feather, in a beautiful world and I wish I was special, you’re so fuckin’ special.” It was speaking to him at that moment. “But I’m a creep; I’m a weirdo. What the hell am I doing here? I don’t belong here.” He played through the bars of the song, feeling the music, losing himself as he always did. He belted out every note with passion and conviction. This time, however, it felt different. Maybe it was being on this stage again for the first time in over three years, but he felt the music cut into him like a knife. “I don’t belong here. I don’t belong here.” The last notes of the song made him feel raw. Like he just showed the tater reminisce of his broken soul to everyone. Knowing no one was there to witness what had just happened helped. He could lie and act as if he didn’t lose a little more of himself just now on that stage than usual.

He put his guitar back in its case, then placed it near the back of the auditorium so he could retrieve it on his way back to Ellen’s office. He looked at his watch. “Fuck!” It was seven o'clock. He ran to the lighting booth, shut off the lights, then locked the door behind him. He slammed open the front doors of the auditorium and Ellen’s keys went flying out of his hands. “Shit!” he mumbled as they made their way across the floor and settled next to a guy sitting in front of the art cases with dark brown, almost black hair, wearing a pair of chucks and dark blue jeans. He went to grab the keys off the ground, but the student had already grabbed the keys and held them in the air. He grabbed them and said,  “Thanks, man.”

A deep resonating voice replied, “No problem.” When the student looked up at Dean, he could tell from the look in those startling blue eyes that this semester was going to be interesting. He couldn’t help but smile.

 

>>>>>>

 

The bus ride to school was always the same. Castiel would put on his headphones, place his head against the window, then close his eyes. It wasn’t a long trip to the high school. He didn’t live far, and there were only three stops left by the time the driver would get to him.

He always knew when he got to the school because he could no longer hear his music. The sound of people talking would overpower whatever he was listening to. Around twenty-five hundred people wandered the halls every day, so it’s not hard to imagine why. This year was going to be especially hectic. Regardless of all the construction, they did to account for the higher volume of students, the addition of ninth graders on top of the usual tenth graders was going to be a doozy. Over twelve hundred kids who have no idea where they are instead of the regular six hundred. Add the students who had already been going there for two or three years who would be just as lost. _Oh, this is going to be fun. Thank God for band camp; otherwise, I would be just as lost._

He usually got to the school around seven o'clock. It left him at least twenty minutes to talk to his best friend Charlie before they had to get to their first class. This year, his first class was AP Statistics. He wasn’t sure that was the best place in his schedule for a class like that, but c’est la vie. He passed the front of the auditorium to stand in front of one of the art cases that he would meet Charlie at every morning and plopped on the floor. He glanced around looking at some familiar faces. Jo was standing with Ash in front of the school store talking about something in hushed tones. Alastair and some of the other jackasses who played for the school football team walked by giving him looks, then laughed at something. It was probably over something insignificant, but their looks made him feel uncomfortable. He recognized many of the faces but knew few of their names. His graduating class alone would have 583 people in it, so no one could expect him to know everyone by name. Long Island didn’t have a small town vibe, in almost any city.

He was just about to start reading one of his graphic novels when the auditorium door slammed open to his left, and someone dropped their keys right next to where he was sitting. He grabbed them and lifted his left hand not even bothering to look up. The person who seized them from his hand said, “Thanks, man.”

“Don’t mention it,” Castiel replied, looking up to see who he was talking to. The green eyes smiling down at him caused him to forget how to breathe. Castiel’s eyes instantly fell towards the man’s plump limps; then he let his gaze fall down the muscular Adonis before him wearing a Led Zeppelin t-shirt and blue jeans. He slowly drifted his gaze back up to the man’s face and saw the smirk he was giving him.

“Well, thanks again,” he said with a wink and walked away.

Castiel cocked his head to the right. _Who would have thought? He looks just as amazing walking away._ He shook his head and went to look at his graphic novel when he saw Charlie skipping towards him wearing her favorite Gryffindor shirt, a black skirt, red and black striped tights, and combat boots. Her red hair swayed back and forth as she made her way to the art case. When she saw him, she quickly switched from skipping to running and then dove into Castiel to hug him. “Oh, my God! I’ve missed you so much!!!! It’s been forever!!!”

“Charlie, you just saw me yesterday,” he struggled to say due to the vice grip Charlie had around him, slowly crushing his ribs. She may have even collapsed one of his lungs in the process.

“Yeah, but that was like, what, eleven hours ago?” She let him go and smiled at him.

“I love you, but you’re weird.”

“I know.”

Castiel rolled his eyes and put his book away.

“Why are you so red? Did you just get here or something? Were you running late? Did you miss the bus?” Charlie rambled off without letting him answer.

“No. I’ve been here since seven. .’ just… I guess I didn’t realize… Did you see that guy wearing the Zeppelin shirt you walked past?” he stuttered, trying to direct his thoughts.

“Um, no. Why? Was he cute or something? You know I don’t recognize shit like that,” Charlie scoffed.

“Cute is an understatement. Gorgeous doesn’t even really cover it. Jesus! Am I that red?” he asked timidly.

“Yeah, dude, like a maraschino cherry. Did he talk to you or something? You only look that way when they try to talk to you,” she claimed, giving him a sarcastic look.

“When they try to talk to me? Who is they?” he asked, exasperated by Charlie‘s continuous sardonic looks.

“You know? Guys you claim to be gorgeous. Then, you get all poetic and crap, and I swear sometimes I feel like you could burst into song,” she jested, giving him a doe-eyed look, batting her eyelashes.

“I do not… Stop looking at me like that! Charlie, just because I think to myself that his face perfectly fits Da Vinci’s idea of physical perfection, or what some call the golden ratio, does not mean I get all ‘Poetic and Crap.’ I just… Geez, stop, ok, fine. Yes, he spoke to me,” he conceded with contempt.

“What did 'Mr. Da Vinci' say to you?” she teased batting her eyelashes vigorously.

Castiel rolled his eyes and looked down at his hands. “He dropped his keys when he was exiting the auditorium. I picked them up for him, then he said, ‘Thank you.' That’s all, so you can stop looking at me like that.”

“Seriously? That’s all he said, and you’re that red? God, he must be pretty!” Charlie exclaimed.

“Again, understatement,” he grumbled, rolling his eyes yet again at her.

“New kid?”

“I don’t fucking know!”

“Hey! There’s no reason to be hostile. Just a question.”

“I don’t know. I’ve never seen him before, so….”

The warning bell rang letting everyone know it was 7:20 and five minutes until the first period.

Charlie gave him a quick hug because they were going in opposite directions. “Meet you sixth period at the lunch room? You have lunch during the sixth period, right?” Charlie asked with a look of worry and despair.

“Yes, remember? On A days, we have lunch together. Then, on B days, we have gym together during the sixth period,” he mentioned, shaking his head.

“Oh, yeah, duh,” she laughed “Sorry first day jitters. You know me. Love Ya! Bye!” she called as she ran off.

Castiel smiled and shook his head again. _That girl is lucky I love her._

He picked up his bag and made a beeline to the math corridor. Can’t be late on his first day after all.


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 100 hits in my first week!!!! Thank you so much for reading :)

“Hey, Mr. Davies! Sorry, I’m late!” Dean huffed as he ran into the band room. He had already dropped off the keys to the auditorium with Ellen. She shook her head at him with a small smile as he tossed them to her and booked it to the band room.

Mick chuckled at him “Dean; you are far from late. It’s only what,” he looked at the clock on the wall, “7:06 a.m.? Seriously, don’t worry. Late would be if you were here at 7:30 a.m. And we’ve been through this. It’s Mick. You’re not a student anymore, Dean.”

Dean smiled at Mick, _God! How do any of these kids understand anything this guy says?_ Mick had been in the states for over ten years, and his Cockney accent was still as thick as ever.

“Plus, Rufus hasn’t even gotten out of the teacher’s lounge yet. If I know him, he’s probably on coffee number three and getting ready to go to the bathroom rather than the classroom.”

“Yeah,” Dean chuckled. “That sounds like him.”

“Now, the first period is a free period for us, so I thought we might as well go over some of the marching band drills together. You weren’t around for band camp, so you have some catching up to do.” He followed Mick to his office and sat in the chair in front of his desk. “These are some of the plans we have laid out thus far.” Mick started to pile manilla file folders in front of Dean that held sheet music and field layouts. “Homecoming is in three weeks, so there’s plenty of time for us to get the drills right. Not perfect, but right. Ellen said her girls would be practicing with us out on the field on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I’ve already had countless arguments with Coach Adler about getting those buffoons off of our field on those days, but there is only so much that can be done when it comes to that man. But, all in all, it looks like it’s going to be a capital year for us.”

“The Beatles? Ellen is probably having a blast trying to choreograph a kickline routine for that. Flags are probably easy, but they’re… oh, wait. 'Twist and Shout' and 'Sgt Pepper.' Yeah, she’ll be able to work with those.” Dean moved from sheet music to sheet music. “What’s the song layout?” Dean looked up at Mick who was smiling down at him with enthusiasm.

“Well, we’re opening with 'Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band.' 'Little Help from my Friends' is an easy follow-up. Then 'Twist and Shout,' and we close with 'All You Need is Love.' I felt that would be a good line up. What do you think?”

“I don’t give a flying fuck what he wants, Mick.” Rufus walked in with his paper and a cup of coffee.

“Do you have to be so crass, Rufus?” Mick raised an eyebrow at the dark mocha face that was scowling at them.

“I’m old. I’m entitled to be crass. Hey, kid.” Rufus smacked Dean on the shoulder with his newspaper. “Just saw Bobby. He told me to go easy on ya. Apparently, he thinks I’m gonna listen to him.”

“He probably thought maybe just this once…” Mick started.

“Look, just do your fucking job, and we’re good. Got it?” He gave Dean a hard look.

“Yes, sir,” Dean gulped.

“Don’t 'sir' me. Just do it! Now, what are we going over here?” he asked as he waved his hand over the papers and took a sip of his coffee.

Dean spent the whole of the first period going over steps, notes, choreography, and sections. By the time the warning bell rang, letting them know the first class of their day was going to be arriving soon, Dean had a massive migraine, but he had to admit it was nice to be finally putting his brain to good use. He took some ibuprofen and got back to work.

When he went to the bathroom in between the second and third period, he let his mind drift. He was surprised when his mind fell upon the blue eyes of the student he had met earlier that day. They had spent maybe thirty seconds in each other’s presence, but he knew he had made an impression. He always did. He chuckled to himself as he dried his hands, thinking about how red the guy turned when Dean winked at him. He had to admit; the guy was hot. Tousled dark hair, piercing sapphire eyes, and thick lips that were made for giving head.

He paused when his train of thought came to that conclusion. _No. You are not fucking everything up over some student who just happened to look your way. Did you learn nothing from Lily? No reason to let another person fuck you up._ Dean opened the bathroom door, then tossed the paper towel into the trash as he made his way back down the hall to the band room.

The rest of the morning went by smooth enough. Dean was excited about the fifth period because he was going to be finally getting outside of the building. Mick told him they would be going out to the football field quickly to go over a few things while Rufus taught Music Theory.

Mick had to talk to Ellen for a moment before they were able to head out to the field, so Dean excused himself to go with Rufus for a bit to grab the textbook and staff book he would need for the next day. Dean was scheduled to observe Rufus during his Advanced Music Theory class this semester, so he needed to be able to follow what the students were learning. “Now, all of these kids already know their shit. They’ve been students of mine for three years now, so they better,” Rufus added with conviction as he opened the door to the classroom that was lined with computers and keyboards.

He followed him up to the desk “Rufus, I’m pretty sure they’d be afraid to not know their shit having you as a teacher.”

Rufus laughed and handed him the class material. “Bobby been telling you some old stories again or something?”

“Rufus, I had you as a teacher, too. You do remember that, right? Bobby didn’t have to tell me a damn thing. He does constantly joke around about a certain bottle of scotch you had to buy him once.”

Rufus laughed even harder. “Well, of course, the son of a bitch is gonna bring that up. It was the one time he was ever right! Now, get out of here. I got a class to teach, and you have a field to review.” He waved his hand at him.

Dean turned around with a soft smile which only grew wider when he locked eyes with the same vivid shade of blue that had held his thoughts earlier that day. He could tell the guy had been watching him because of the deep scarlet he turned when he saw Dean looking right back at him. _That is so adorable._ He walked up to him “Hey, man!” He smiled and winked. “How’s it going?”

He didn’t think it was possible for someone to blush so hard, but the guy looked down at his knotted fingers.

“Okay.” He looked up and gave Dean a shy glance.

 _Wow, be a little more obvious, kid._ He couldn’t lie, he liked how nervous he made the guy. He gave him a smile he knew had broken many a person’s hearts and said, “Later,” before he left the room.

When the door shut behind him, he felt his face flush when his thoughts once again drifted towards the gutter as he thought about the student just on the other side of that door.

“Dean, shall we?” Mick’s voice brought him out of his reverie.

“Yeah. Lead the way.” He motioned his hand and followed him out to the field.

 

>>>>>>

 

Most of Castiel’s morning was spent listening to different teachers going on about what the class syllabus was and what they expect from each of their students. He was right about one thing; AP Statistics being the first period was a mistake. He could hardly stay awake. The teacher’s voice was a monotonous drone, and he looked at the ceiling when he spoke. Castiel knew this class was going to be impossible. _Maybe I should talk to Ms. Mills and see about dropping this class._

The second period was AP Psychology. He knew he was going to enjoy this one. The teacher, Mr. Roché, reminded him of an older version of his cousin Balthazar. The third period was AP Physics. Mr. Devereaux was a little out there, but he knew he was going to do well in his class. The fourth period was AP Literature. Ms. Hanscum was a riot. Everyone loved her accent. Since she was initially from Hibbing, Minnesota, she sounded nothing like the Long Island, New York accent everyone expected. A lot of “Hiyas” and “You Betchas.” She made Castiel and the rest of the class laugh with her jubilant spirit.

Music Theory was the fifth period. The classroom was familiar. It hadn’t changed in the three years he’d been taking its courses. He chose his usual spot, the back left the corner, and smiled at Mr. Turner, who was also one of the honor band conductors when he entered the classroom. As Castiel took out his staff book and pencil, he recognized the man following Mr. Turner to his desk. It was the green-eyed masterpiece, his "Mr. Da Vinci," who he had met outside the auditorium earlier. He watched the two of them with rapt attention. Mr. Turner was laughing at something the man had said and handed him a textbook along with a staff book. _Anyone who can make Mr. Turner laugh like that has to be some sort of miracle. Who is this guy?_ Castiel continued to stare until the bell rang and his Mr. Da Vinci turned to leave with a smile. The man locked eyes with Castiel as he walked towards the door. His heart stopped

“Hey, man!” He smiled and winked. “How’s it going?”

Castiel could feel himself blush this time, then looked down at his knotted fingers. “Okay.” He bravely stole a glance up to see green eyes still looking at him with a smug grin on his perfect face.

“Later.” He threw him one more soul-shattering, heart-crushing smile at Castiel, then closed the door.

Castiel had always been attracted to men. It had been something he had been picked on since early adolescence. The first time he realized he was gay was when he was watching Mr. and Mrs. Smith with Charlie. He remembered watching Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie making out at the cantina in the rain and thinking, _I wish I were Angelina._ Subsequently, that was also around the same time Charlie realized she was gay because she was thinking, _I wish I were Brad._

He had always been attracted to men, but something about those green eyes. Something about his gravelly voice and dashing smile made Castiel’s insides quake, and his heart stop.

He only stopped thinking about him when Mr. Turner started to bark out his usual orders.

After class was over, he turned right towards the cafeteria and saw Mr. Da Vinci standing with Mr. Davies over by the entrance to the hallway which held Ms. Harvelle’s office. He froze where he stood as he watched the two of them talking. _Christ! Is this guy everywhere at once or something!?_

He made his way towards the cafeteria, then quickly turned left avoiding the two men on the opposite side of the hallway. “Charlie!!!!” Castiel exclaimed and ran towards his best friend when he saw her.

“Castiel!!!” she jested, mocking Castiel’s vigor.

“Shut up and look over by Ms. Harvelle’s office.”

Charlie looked to the left to where the music classrooms and offices were. “What am I looking for?”

“Holy shit, Charlie! Are you seriously that blind?! It’s my Adonis! The one I was telling you about earlier? The one you called 'Mr. Da Vinci'? He’s over there talking to Mr. Davies,” Castiel almost whined.

Charlie squinted a bit and started to walk closer to get a better look. Castiel watched as Charlie took her time to observe the features of the tall man with dirty blonde hair, chiseled jaw, and muscular build talking to the English band teacher. “Yeah, he is hot. Is he a teacher? Considering what he’s wearing, I would assume he’s not. He hasn’t been in any of my classes. I haven’t seen him around anywhere. Who is he?”

“I have no idea,” Castiel huffed. “But two times now, he has thrown me off and made me turn beet red. What the hell is wrong with me?” Castiel groaned while softly banging his head on a locker in front of the cafeteria.

“Nothing. Shit happens. And you are right. The guy is hot. Why don’t you just go ask 'Mr. Da Vinci' who he is? Can’t hurt.” Charlie shrugged.

“You have got to be joking? I just told you what has happened to me twice now and you want me to go talk to him? Are you insane? I’ll have a heart attack!” he huffed.

“Fine. Don’t ask. Not my problem. I could care less who the guy is, but obviously, you do care. Suck it up, Shurley, and do something.” Charlie crossed her arms, then turned towards the cafeteria waiting for the doors to open and let them in.

Castiel looked over at the two men standing by Ms. Harvelle’s office and questioned as to what he should do. On the one hand, Charlie was right. He did care. Castiel was incredibly curious who this man was and why he was here. On the other hand, he was socially awkward and knew he would lock up on the spot as soon as he tried to walk over there to talk to him.

While he was standing there staring, trying to figure out what to do, emerald green eyes locked with his sapphire blue and this time they held his gaze. They just stood there, staring at each other, until Charlie tapped Castiel on the shoulder letting him know the doors to the cafeteria had opened. When he looked back, the man was gone.

_Who the hell is this guy?!?!?!_

 

>>>>>

 

“Oh, God, Ellen, you outdid yourself this time!” Dean leaned back in the chair and rubbed his stomach.

Ellen laughed. “Well, I’m happy you enjoyed the sandwiches that much. Sam, you sure you don’t want any? There is plenty here.” Ellen motioned towards the container holding the pulled pork.

“No, I think Bobby and Dean are eating enough to cover me,” Sam chuckled.

Bobby and Dean looked at the other two with shocked expressions. “What? I like my woman’s cooking, so sue me,” Bobby said as he put the sandwich down on his plate.

“Sammy, we went over this just this morning. Not all of us can live on rabbit food, and Ellen is a damn good cook,” Dean said as he grabbed another roll and put a scoop of the barbecued meaty goodness on it.

“Well, I’m happy you guys enjoy it so much. It’s sad Jo doesn’t have lunch during this period. It would be nice to have everyone together for lunch every day,” Ellen mused.

“I saw Jo this morning. She was spending time with that Ash kid. Someone has got to tell the guy mullets went out of style over twenty years ago,” Dean noted with a mouth full of food.

“Leave the boy alone. He is a magician when it comes to staging production. I was lost when Garth graduated. The kid has been a lifesaver. I don’t know what I’m going to do when he graduates at the end of this year.” Ellen sighed, shaking her head.

“What musical are you guys planning on doing this year?” Sam asked while shoveling some more salad into his mouth.

“I’m waiting for some final paperwork to go through but, believe it or not, we’re being approved for _RENT_!” she exclaimed excitedly.

“Oh, fucking figures! I graduate, and you get the musical I wanted. You knew I always wanted to play Roger.” Dean took another big bite off his sandwich before Bobby smacked him upside the head knocking some of the food out of his mouth

“Watch your mouth, boy. You know better than that.” Bobby adjusted his baseball cap as he stood up to say goodbye to the three of them.

“What?” Dean asked with a mouth still filled with food.

Bobby shook his head “I’ll see you, boys, later.” He leaned over and kissed Ellen on the cheek “Later, sweetheart.”

She closed her eyes and smiled as he laid the kiss on her cheek. “Get out of here, you old softy,” she blushed.

Bobby gave her a coy smile, then left the office closing the door behind him.

Ellen looked at the two boys who had huge grins on their faces. “Oh, shut up, you two. Don’t you have places to be?” she questioned as she looked up at the clock.

“Just let us finish eating, and we’ll get out of your hair.” Dean took another large bite out of the sandwich as he smiled. He loved seeing Bobby happy. Ellen and Bobby had been together since Dean’s senior year. It started innocently enough as him helping her with different items for the musical sets. Then, it turned into her showing up at his classroom asking for some advice on her car. Sooner or later, Bobby blundered through asking her on a date, and the rest was history. Luckily enough for the two of them, Dean, Sam, and Jo got along famously. Otherwise, he didn’t think they would have lasted the almost four years they've been together so far. Dean was not looking forward to the day they decided it was time to move in together somewhere. After the last vacation they went on together, he knew Jo’s bathroom habits would be a problem if they lived in the one and a half bathroom house he, Bobby, and Sam shared. _Hopefully, I’ll be on my own at that point._

Dean and Sam finished their lunch, then cleaned up before they said goodbye to Ellen who was already immersed in paperwork for the music department. Sam exited the office and waved goodbye as he made his way towards the math hallway. _The kid is in tenth grade and is already taking AP Calculus. When t_ he bell rang, Dean went to turn down the band hallway but froze when he saw his mystery student. He had a massive smile on his face as he chatted with the same girl with fiery red hair he saw him talking to before lunch and a shorter brunette who looked like she could give him a run for his money in the smartass department. Dean smiled at the scene as he watched them walk past him. He was happy that this time he could observe the guy rather than the other way around. The moment they shared in the hallway earlier was unnerving. He could kick himself. He just stood there. Staring. He couldn’t drag his gaze away from those cerulean eyes. He closed his eyes and shook his head. _Ignore it. Don’t fuck shit up. It’s only your first day._

 

>>>>>>

 

The rest of the day went by in a haze. He barely heard anything Dr. Morrison said as he spoke of his plans for his AP World History class. He doodled while Ms. Talbot discussed her plans to read La Divina Comedia by Dante Alighieri in the original Italian. When the bell rang at 1:20 p.m., letting him know it was time for the band, he nearly ran to the band room to see if his mystery man was there.

Much to his chagrin, Mr. Da Vinci was nowhere to be found. He took his spot next to Anna, the only other person who played the oboe and fixed his stand to prepare for whatever Mr. Turner and Mr. Davies had planned for the day before they made their way to the football field. He took his oboe out and stuck his double reed in his mouth, getting it ready for when one of the conductors was prepared for them.

As he was putting his music and pencil on the stand, his pencil fell. When he went to pick it up, he slammed his forehead into the stand. He took the reed out of his mouth, closed his eyes, and clutched his head in both of his hands, his elbows on his thighs. “Fuck!” That was going to leave a mark.

He didn’t say it loud enough for everyone to hear. Still, he knew someone heard him because they chuckled. He opened his eyes and removed his hands from his face to look for the pencil again. It was gone.

“Ahem,” someone cleared their throat. It was the same someone who he heard not too long before chuckle at him. When he looked at who it was, all the color drew from his face. “I think you dropped this.”

“Thank you,” he breathed as the color began to seep back to his cheeks, then he took back his pencil. _Shit! How does this guy keep doing this to me!?_

“You’re welcome, um, what’s your name?”

“Castiel.”

Mr. Da Vinci took a moment to mull over Castiel's name. “You’re welcome, Cas,” he smiled.

“It’s Castiel, but okay. I guess you can call me Cas. No one else does, but I guess it’s okay if you want to call me Cas. It’s not a problem or anything.” He was babbling. _Oh, my God! Shut the hell up!!! First, you’re afraid to talk to him. Now, you can’t shut up? Just stop talking!!!_ Castiel looked away, then back at the man and smiled awkwardly.

The guy shook his head and chuckled “Okay, Cas. Later.” He walked to stand next to Mr. Turner and Mr. Davies.

Anna looked at him with a mystified expression. “What the hell was that?”

Castiel put his head back in his hands shaking it, then dragged them down his cheeks, holding them there like Macaulay Culkin in _Home Alone_. “I have no idea.”

Anna giggled. “He is cute, isn’t he?”

Castiel put his hands down, then turned to Anna with an irritated expression and jeered, “No? Really? I never noticed,” like a sarcastic ass.

It only made Anna laugh a bit harder. “Oh, boy.”

“Tell me about it.” He put his head back in his hands with his elbows on his thighs. The bell rang. He sat up running his hands through his unruly hair and faced towards the three men standing in the front of the band room. Mr. Da Vinci was shaking his head and smiling to himself. Castiel knew that meant he saw his exchange with Anna. _Fuck!_

His gaze lingered on Mr. Da Vinci and his smartass smirk longer than he knew it should. It didn’t matter that Castiel just embarrassed himself utterly and ultimately, he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the beautiful specimen before him. A being that showed that God must exist. The other man’s face sobered momentarily as he was lost in thought. Castiel only had a moment to contemplate what the look could mean before Mr. Davies started to talk.

 _“_ Good afternoon, everyone! I hope you all enjoyed your final week of summer break since I last saw you. I know I did.” Mr. Davies smiled at everyone. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to make an introduction before we head out to the field. No need for music stands today.”

 _Friggin figures._  

“Mr. Turner and I have someone helping us out for this semester. He is a junior at Five Towns College studying music theory and music education. On Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, he will be here as both a student teacher and teaching assistant. So, I am pleased to welcome Mr. Dean Winchester.” Mr. Davies pointed at Castiel’s Mr. Da Vinci.

 _Well, at least I know his name and can stop calling him Mr. Da Vinci,_  Castiel smiled to himself.

Dean walked up next to Mr. Davies and waved at everyone while saying, “Hi,” as the room applauded him. He took a step back and continued to throw dashing looks at everyone in the room. Castiel could tell he was a cocky bastard who knew he was desirable. There was no question there. He could swear for a moment he saw Dean look towards him, but he probably imagined it.

“Dean is an alumnus of the school himself. I’m happy to have him back in my band room again.” He patted Dean on the back as he smiled with pride. “Alright, let’s all get our instruments tuned. I want us to be in sync before we go outside to practice. Everyone, please play B flat and hold the note.”

The entire band held their instruments at attention, preparing for Mr. Davies to wave his baton and signal for them to play and hold B flat.

The entire time, Castiel looked at Dean. He did everything Mr. Davies told him to do. He played B flat and held it, but he was so busy staring at Dean, he didn’t see Mr. Davies signal for them to stop playing. He looked down in embarrassment when Anna nudged him to get him to stop playing.

She looked away, chuckling to herself. _Oh, shit! This is going to be an issue. Maybe I should drop honor band, too, while I’m at it._

Castiel shook his head to get in gear and stood up with Anna so that they could make their way out to the football field. _Hopefully, the football team listens for once and doesn’t show up on the field at 2:45 as usual._

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean watched Cas’ antics from the middle of the band room as he conversed with the cute redhead next to him. From what he could tell, Cas was slowly losing his shit over the way Dean was teasing him. _The guy just rambled on for over a minute about his name. He is so lost._ Dean shook his head and laughed at the poor guy whose head was currently buried in his hands. When the bell rang, he felt Cas’ eyes on him and smirked. _Oh, this guy is all sorts of fun._ He shouldn’t enjoy the way the kid was fawning over him, but he had to admit, it was nice having someone underneath his thumb again. Since Lily… well, she kind of destroyed him in more than one way.

Mick starting the class brought him out of his stupor. _“_ Good afternoon, everyone! I hope you all enjoyed your final week of summer break since I last saw you. I know I did. Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to make an introduction before we head out to the field. No need for music stands today.”

Dean stood up straighter. Everyone’s eyes were already on him; he should at least look somewhat professional. _Ellen was right. Why the fuck am I wearing this on my first day_?

“Mr. Turner and I have someone helping us out for this semester. He is a junior at Five Towns College studying music theory and music education. On Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, he will be here as both a student teacher and teaching assistant. So, I am pleased to welcome Mr. Dean Winchester.”

Dean stepped forward and lifted up his right hand saying, “Hi,” before he took a step back while everyone continued to applaud him. A few of them a little more boisterous than others. Most of them were girls. He turned on a bit of the smolder and saw one girl actually swoon. _Oh, God, how I’ve missed that._ Dean knew he was hot. He didn’t need all of these eyes on him to remind him of that. Dean couldn’t help himself when he stole a quick glance to his left at Cas. Dean watched him as he clapped with his brows furrowed and head tilted. Almost as if he was trying to understand what was going on. _Fuck, that’s adorable._ Dean internally chastised himself for once again letting his thoughts wander towards the guy who he just noticed is wearing a Sgt Pepper shirt. _Oh, what a dork._ He shook his head and smiled once again.

“Dean is actually an alumnus of the school himself. I’m happy to have him back in my band room again.”

Dean smiled wide at Mick while the other did the same and patted him on the back.

“Alright, let’s all get our instruments tuned. I want us to be in sync before we go outside to practice. Everyone, please play B flat and hold the note.”

He watched as the entire band brought their instruments up in unison and waited for Mick’s instructions. As the room was filled with the sound of all of the instruments playing one single note, it brought Dean back to all of the years he had spent in those seats. He smiled at the memory of his years at band camp, Hofstra, winter concert.

Mick waved his baton for everyone to stop, but he still heard a single oboe continue to hold the note. Dean didn’t have to turn to his left to know who it was. He looked down at his boots and smiled. _Poor guys got it bad._

“Alright, then. Everyone, follow me to the field. We’ll have twenty minutes to practice on our own before the girls show up after school for practice.” Mick nodded, and everyone started to gather their things.

“Hey, Drumline! I’m only going to say this once! Just because you are standing behind the kickline, does not mean we cannot see you. Stop getting distracted by the ladies. I’m talking to you, Andy.” Rufus pointed to a kid who was grabbing a snare drum and hooking it over his shoulders with a shocked expression.

“What did I do?” he hollered down at Rufus.

“You almost ran into one of the girls during 'Twist and Shout' during band camp. It was embarrassing for all us to watch. So, cool it!” Rufus glared at the kid who held his hands up.

“Ok! Geez.”

Dean walked behind Cas on their way to the field and saw him sneak looks at him to see if Dean was still there. He could tell the redhead was trying to ask Cas something, but he was not willing to share while Dean was right behind him. So, Dean widened his gate and walked a little faster to get in front of them. _I gotta get to the field to set up the markers anyway._ He started to jog a bit. It did not escape his notice that Cas’ eyes followed him as he ran ahead.

Rufus spoke to the band in front of the bleachers as Dean set up the markers. He couldn’t hear a word of what was being said because of how hard the wind was blowing, but he didn’t have to listen to him to know what points he was trying to get across. If he knew Rufus, he was saying something along the lines of, “Do as I say, pay attention, and don’t miss your mark.”

When he was done putting out all the markers, he walked over to one of the benches and watched all the students take their places as he took a seat. The sound was remarkable. The marching band was always his favorite part of Honor Band. He could tell from the looks on most of the students' faces on the field that the same was true for them. Even though it was still the beginning of the semester, they sounded and looked incredible.

No matter how many times he looked over the sea of students’ faces, his gaze always seemed to land on Cas. Even from five yards away, he could still see the brilliant blue of the other’s eyes. His hair, which was already a mess on its own, was now windswept. His cheeks were turning a rosy pink from the sun shining down on them. He leaned back on the bench watching the easy steps the other took and the way his face lit up when he made a small crooked smile at the redhead next to him. _Cut it out, Dean! Pay attention to Mick and Rufus. You’re working, remember?_

When the girls of the Kickline/Color Guard team showed up, everyone took a quick five-minute break while the girls set up. He took a moment to go say hello to Ellen and Jo. As he walked over, Jo didn’t seem the least bit interested in paying attention to Dean. She stuck her tongue out at him, then winked as she ran over to the other girls.

“What’s eating, Jo?” Dean inquired, tilting his head towards the blonde who was jumping up and down next to a menacing brunette and the quirky redhead Cas had been talking to around lunchtime earlier. _Hmm, interesting._

“Didn’t she tell you? She’s the captain of the kickline.” Ellen smiled with pride.

“Oh, really? Well, she most certainly did neglect to tell me that. Good for her,” he remarked with just as much pride.

“Yeah, she’s very excited. She’s a little worried about it though because she knows she’s probably gonna have to pick up the slack for Ruby over there.” Ellen motioned her head towards the menacing brunette. “She was somehow nominated for color guard captain. I don’t know how, but that manipulative bitch always seems to win in the end.”

“Ellen, she’s one of your students. You can’t say that.” Dean put his hand over his heart, feigning offense at what Ellen just expressed.

“What? It’s true! She’s a conniving little brat. I was rooting for Charlie, over there, but can’t always get what we want.”

Dean looked at the redhead who was waving at Cas who nervously waved back at her. Jo also joined in waving at Cas, who in turn smiled and waved back with a little more enthusiasm at the two of them. _So, Jo knows him, too… Gonna have to remember that._

“COME ON HURRY UP, LADIES! WE DON’T HAVE ALL DAY!” Rufus yelled from on top of his soapbox.

“OH, QUIT YOUR HOLLERING, RUFUS. WE’RE COMIN’!” Ellen shouted back at him. “Go on; you should get back to work. We’ll talk later.” She smiled softly at him.

“Okay. Later, Ellen.” He winked at her and faced towards the bench he was sitting on before the girls showed up. His attention was drawn away from his path to the seat when he noticed a silent conversation between the redhead, which he now knew was Charlie, and Cas. He watched the exchange until Cas saw him watching and turned a deep crimson as he looked down at his Chucks. _God, this guy is too much._

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel was happy when the practice was finally over. Luckily, they weren’t interrupted by the football team, but he felt utterly uncomfortable knowing Dean was there watching them, or him for that matter. He felt like the guy's eyes were always on him. It was driving him insane. He knew he imagined it. He had to be, right? When Mr. Turner hollered at all of them to get going, he huffed out a sigh of relief and walked over to Charlie who was finishing packing up the flags the girls had thrown next to the bag.

Charlie grabbed the bag holding all of the flags from the field and turned to Castiel “Hey, bestie!!!”

Castiel leaned his head on the shoulder which was not currently holding the weight of fifty flagpoles. “Fuck my life, Charlie. Just fuck my life.”

“Woah, what’s going on?” Charlie asked as she readjusted the bag and they started walking towards the building.

“Mr. Da Vinci, his name is Dean Winchester,” he replied, then turned to watch Dean bend over to pick up all of the markers from the field. _Shit, he’s got a nice ass._

“Well, that’s good. You know his name. I assume at this point you also know why he’s here, too.” She looked at him intently.

“Yeah, he’s the TA and student teacher for the first semester. He’s going to be at the school Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays until the middle of January.” Castiel was not looking forward to the next couple of months. He had already embarrassed himself countless times so far that day. Four and a half months of this was going to be torture.

Charlie noticed Castiel’s dismal expression “Hey, it’s not that bad! Eye candy, right?”

Castiel looked at her and glared “Eye candy? Really? That's where you’re going with this? Do you realize how many times I embarrassed myself so far today? I’m going to belong in a sanitarium by the end of this semester if this shit continues.”

“Such a drama queen. Look, lighten up. I gotta go drop off these flags and say goodbye to the girls. Text you later?”

“Yeah, sounds good.” He gave Charlie an awkward side hug and made his way towards the band room.

When he reached his seat in the band room, he started to take apart his oboe. Anna walked up beside him, then began to pack up her things as well. “You’re in Concert Choir tomorrow, right?”

“Yeah. It’s a B day. You know how it goes,” he answered with a shrug.

“Yeah,” she moped. “You know, it sucks. I wish I stuck with Treble Choir. I wouldn’t be all alone every other day.”

Castiel turned to her flabbergasted. “Anna, there are over ninety people in this band room? How on earth are you alone?”

She shrugged. “You’re my band buddy. Have been for nine years. It’s not the same.”

“Anna, really?” He was beyond shocked.

“What? It’s senior year. I can’t be nostalgic?” She shot him with a withering stare.

“No,” he deadpanned.

She laughed. “Well, at least I get to look at Mr. Winchester more than you do.” She gave him a wicked grin.

“God, don’t embarrass me. I think I’ve done a good job all on my own so far today,” he laughed, shaking his head at his feet.

“He’s fucking hot. You’d have to be blind not to notice it,” Anna laughed back.

Castiel thought back to the way the sun reflected in his green eyes out on the football field. Or how his ass looked when he bent over to pick up the markers from the field. He could feel his dick starting to agree with Anna’s statement; then he began to think about feet to turn himself off.

Anna was watching him the entire time. “Geez, you got it bad, Castiel.”

“What?”

“Nothing.” She smiled to herself.

When he was done, he picked up his case and his backpack, then turned to Anna, “Later!”

She looked up and smiled at him.

When he turned around, he slammed into Dean who was coming through the band door which led directly towards the after school buses. Everything Dean and Castiel were holding went flying. _Jesus, could I be any more of a cliché?_ “I am **so** sorry, Mr. Winchester. I wasn’t looking where I was going. I am so sorry. Let me help,” he said, bending down to help Dean with the papers that flew all around the door.

Dean looked up. “Nah, man. It’s ok. It didn’t go too far. I got it. Thanks, though.” He winked, and Castiel swooned. Actually friggin swooned.

 _PLEASE STOP DOING THAT!!!_ he screamed in his head.

“No problem,” he mumbled.

“See ya tomorrow, Cas.” He smiled and walked into the band room towards Mr. Davies and Mr. Turner’s office.

“Yeah, see ya,” Castiel mumbled again.

Castiel ran to his bus. He got comfortable, then took out his headphones. Once he made his music selection, “Don’t Stand So Close to Me” by The Police, he looked out the window and saw him.

Dean was walking towards a black classic muscle car, an Impala if he was not mistaken, with a staff book and a guitar case. Dean caught his stare and smiled. As the bus started moving Dean waved at him.

The butterflies in his stomach were swarming. _Fuck my life… maybe I can just drop out. Or transfer. Either one. Ugh! This year is gonna suck._


	3. Chapter Three

Castiel did his homework when he got home. There wasn’t much since it was the first day, but when you’re in any sort of honors or AP class, the work never ends. Sitting at the desk in his bedroom, he was just about to put the final touches on a chapter summary he was writing when there was a knock on his bedroom door.

“Come in.”

“Hey!” his dad, Chuck, beamed. “Just letting you know I’m home. How was school?”

“You know, the usual.” Castiel held up his physics textbook to show him what he was doing.

“Ew! I don’t know how or why you do it. Regardless, I’m proud of you,” he smiled brightly. “Anyway, dinner should be ready in a half hour or so.”

“Okay. Thanks, dad.”

He shrugged and closed the door as he left.

His dad was always the one to cook dinner when his mom was at work. He was up and out of the house at around 4:30 every morning to beat the morning rush into the city; then he would leave the office early to beat the traffic coming home. Not to mention, he wanted to be there to pick Hannah up before the after-school program closed. No matter what, he brought his work home with him, but he always made time for dinner.

His father was in publishing. Shurley & Edlund Press. He started the publishing house with his college roommate, Marv, and Castiel was planning his entire life around eventually working there. He didn’t want to go into publishing. If he were honest with himself, he would instead work for his Aunt Amara. She made a name for herself as a music producer, then eventually decided to start her label, Obscurité Entertainment. His love for music came from her. She taught him how to play the piano, sing, and introduced him to The Beatles. Of course, circumstances had changed, and he hadn't spent as much time in front of an audience as a solo act since his early teens, but he would have no problem being on the production end. He knows she would love to have him working for her, but he was expected to work at his father's publishing house. So, he was planning his entire life around that career path, regardless of where his real passion lies.

Around six, he heard his sister running around upstairs, which usually signaled dinner was ready. Dinner wasn’t anything extravagant; just some steak, mashed potatoes, and green beans. His dad sat there cutting up Hannah’s food into small bite sized pieces while he talked about the latest author they acquired. “I swear this guy, Eric Kripke, is going to be the next Stephen King. I see TV shows and movie adaptations with this one.”

“That’s great. I know that will certainly turn a profit when Hollywood comes to buy the rights to whatever it is.” Castiel pushed the remaining bits of food around his plate until he decided to get up and clean up dinner.

“Everything okay?” his dad asked with obvious concern in his voice and face.

“Yeah, everything is fine. I’m just thinking about my class schedule and thinking maybe I should drop a course or two,” Castiel mentioned while he was scrubbing the pan his dad had used to make the steak.

“Okay. What courses were you thinking?” his dad inquired while he tried to get Hannah to sit still and finish her dinner.

“I don’t know. I know I want to drop AP Statistics. The teacher is a bore. I know I’ll fail because of it. And maybe... Honor Band.”

“WHAT?!?! Honor Band?! Why would you drop that course? You love your music courses!” his dad exclaimed in disbelief.

He didn’t want to tell his dad the real reason, so he lied instead. “Yeah, I’m not sure I want to spend my time on the oboe this year. I was thinking perhaps just sticking with concert choir every day. I know Ms. Moseley would love that,” he admitted sheepishly.

“No.” His father stood by the sink to look at Castiel. “I think you should think this through before you make any final decisions about Honor Band. AP Statistics, on the other hand, if you don’t feel comfortable taking that course, then I agree, you should try to find a course which suits you. Still, please promise me you’ll think before you drop Honor Band, okay?” his father pleaded.

“Ok. I will,” Castiel promised.

“Good. I’m going to finish taking care of a few things I brought home from work with me. Would you mind looking after Hannah while I take care of it? Your mom should be back from the hospital in an hour,” his father added.

“Yeah, sure. I finished my homework, so I can hang out with Hannah.”

“Thanks. Love you!” His dad gave him a pat on the back then walked to his office.

Castiel finished putting the remaining dishes into the machine, then turned it on. “So, Hannah, what movie do you want to watch tonight?” he asked as he looked at Hannah, who was playing with her dolls in the living room.

“Moana!” she crowed, clapping her hands together, jumping around in a circle.

He groaned. “Again?”

“Yes! Pleeeeease?” she begged.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Fine. You’re lucky I love you.”

“Love you, too,” she whispered sweetly to him as she crawled next to him on the couch.

Castiel turned on the movie. He and Hannah knew the words to every song and sang together. As soon as Maui started singing “You’re Welcome,” Hannah looked up expectantly. Castiel always sang that song to her. He would act it out for her; then they would dance around the living room together.

When the movie was done, he heard the front door open, and Hannah ran into the other room excited to see their mom was finally home, screaming, “MAMA!!!!” the whole way.

“Hey, sweetie. How was school?”

“Good! I made macaroni art today. Do you want to see it?”

Castiel walked over to where they stood by the front door. He saw his sister shaking with anticipation and delight.

His mom was wearing a face-splitting grin. “Of course, I do!”

Hannah skipped out of the room to find her artwork.

“Hi, honey! How was your day?” Becky asked as she took her shoes off by the door, then leaned into him to kiss his cheek.

Castiel kissed her back. “You know, same stuff different year. I think I’m going to see Ms. Mills after school tomorrow to drop AP Statistics. I don’t think that class is going to work out.”

“Well, whatever makes you happy. Hopefully, there are still some electives available you’ll like.”

“I’m sure they will," he said with a nod. "I’m going to my room. I’m pretty tired. Say goodnight to dad for me.” He kissed her again on the cheek. “Good night, Hannah!” he yelled.

“NIGHT, CASTIEL!!!!!” Hannah hollered back from the other room where she was sitting in wait to show their mom her artwork.

“Good night, honey.”

Castiel made his way back downstairs to his room. He paused when he got to his bedroom door and glanced at the closet across from it. He did this dance almost every day since the end of ninth grade. He took a deep breath and sighed. _Eventually, I’ll play like I used to…_ He stared longingly at the door for one last moment, then turned back to his room. When he shut his door behind him, he turned to the bed and face planted onto his pillow.

It was only 9:30, but he was ready to shut his eyes and let his day fade away into a restless slumber. He rolled over onto his back and stared at the ceiling.

Castiel pulled his cell phone out of his back pocket and texted Charlie as he promised.

**Castiel: How’s your night going?**

It took Charlie all of thirty seconds to respond.

**Charlie: You know the usual. I just kicked Ash’s ass again in WOW.**

Castiel couldn’t help but laugh out loud.

**Castiel: How could he ever assume he could destroy the Queen of Moons?**

**Charlie: I KNOW RIGHT?!?!?! That's what I've been telling him for months now! He'll never learn. Silly Muggle. Lmao**

Castiel sat there for a moment or two thinking about what he should say before Charlie sent him another text.

**Charlie: So, how're you doing?**

Castiel sighed thinking back to earlier that day after marching band. 

 **Castiel: Well... I've been better. Ran into Dean like a spaz because I wasn't watching where I was going. Knocked everything out of his hands and apologized. He winked at me and told me it was okay.**  

**Charlie: Winked at you, huh? ;)**

**Castiel: I don't think it's like that. You should have seen the way he acted when everyone in the band room was applauding him. He knows he's hot. He's just doing it to torture me.**  

 **Charlie: That's not necessarily true.**  

Castiel wondered if she could see his bitch face through the phone, he hoped so. _This is almost as bad as her eye candy comment._

 **Castiel: Charlie, guys like him, don't go for guys like me. He's doing it because he knows he can get a rise out of me... no pun intended. Lol**  

 **Charlie: Lmao**  

 **Charlie: Also, what do you mean guys like you? I know I’m not the best judge, but you are an attractive guy.**  

Castiel shook his head. _Yes. A lesbian is telling me I’m attractive…_  

 **Castiel: Thanks *rolls eyes***  

 **Charlie: Well, give the guy the benefit of the doubt. Worse comes to worse; he hurts you, they'll never find the body :D**  

Castiel laughed out loud once again. _Only her._  

 **Castiel: Thanks for that, Charlie. I'll remember that. I'm going to bed. See you tomorrow.**  

**Charlie: TTFN, Bestie!!!! <3**

He grabbed his headphones from the nightstand, then plugged them into his phone so that he could listen to the Beatles. He was still reeling from the stress of the day and knew they would help calm him down. He closed his eyes while listening to _Abbey Road_. When “Something” began to play, his thoughts strayed to green eyes with plump lips shaped into a tantalizing grin. His eyes shot open. “That’s it! I’m going to bed.” This was fruitless. As soon as he started to drift off into a restless slumber, those same features were haunting his dreams.

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean took his time driving back to his house. He stopped to fill up his tank at Shell, then went to the Village Market to pick up some snacks and drinks for the band when they showed up. He felt like he had to try to win back everyone’s trust, so he may have gone a little overboard on the snacks. Garth told him Benny was over it, but he knew Pam was going to be a little harder to win over. Which is understandable considering Jesse pulled the same shit as he did. _She’ll forgive you eventually._

When he pulled into the driveway, Benny was already there with Pam unloading her drum set. When they heard the engine of the Impala, Pam turned to Dean. She had her arms crossed and glared at him through the windshield.

_Oh, this is going to be fun._

He walked up to Pam holding the grocery bags and just looked right back at her not saying a word.

She raised her eyebrow, bit the inside of her cheek, gave him a once-over, then sighed. “Are we practicing hotshot or what?”

Dean nodded and smiled to himself as he walked up to his massive garage to unlock it for Benny and Pam.

As Pam walked past Dean, she flicked him on his right ear.

“Shit, Pam! What the fuck?!”

“That’s for being a dick and ditching us as you did for that conniving piece of ass! Next time, I won’t be so nice. Now, put down all that crap and come to help us bring in all the equipment.” She pushed past him then put her drumsticks on the workbench in the back of the garage.

Dean put the grocery bags next to Pam's sticks on the workbench, then walked out to Benny’s truck, who had already piled the amps on top of each other. “Hey, brotha. Don’t mind her too much. She has her reasons.”

“I know. Every single one of them is valid.” Dean gave Benny a smile that hardly reached his eyes.

Benny draped an arm over Dean’s shoulder. “Give us all a bit of time. You just disappeared on all of us for four months. You bailed on a gig which had a label executive that was very interested in us. You know she gave the spot to Adam’s band. Let them record a demo and everything. She liked them that much.”

Dean didn’t know. Garth didn’t tell him. “I’m sorry, man.”

“We can bring her back. Just don’t pull anything like you did again and we’ll make it. You know we will.”

“Are you ladies done gossiping? I’d like to practice sometime today.” Pam was leaning up against the frame of the garage door.

“Shouldn’t we wait for Garth to get here?” Dean asked.

Almost as if he planned it, Garth’s P.O.S. rolled into the driveway. He turned off the engine and hopped out of the driver’s seat. He ran up to Dean and wrapped him in a bear hug. “Missed you, man!”

Dean patted Garth on the back awkwardly. “Yeah, you, too.”

“Aww, how sweet. Come on, girls. We got some songs to jam out to.” Pam turned and walked into the garage.

The three hours they spent jamming and eating junk food was more than Dean could have hoped for. It felt just like he remembered. Pam warmed up to him a bit more as the session went on. Benny started to joke around with him as he used to and Garth...well, Garth would always forgive Dean without so much as a second guess. They’d been through way too much together since high school that he would still be more than understanding. He was a better friend than he deserved.

When 7:30 rolled around, they decided to call it quits. Perfect timing, too, because Bobby’s Chevelle was pulling into the driveway signaling his burger and pie had arrived. They packed everything into Benny’s truck, then said their goodbyes. Dean locked up the garage after they drove off then went into the house through the back door which was closest to the kitchen. He could already hear the TV on in the living room. Which usually meant in about ten minutes, Bobby would be asleep on his Lazy Boy, watching the history channel. He smiled and walked over to the bag that held the food Sam and Bobby had brought back from the diner for him.

“Hey, Dean! How did practice go?” Sam walked into the kitchen, then went to the fridge.

“Great!” Dean continued to inspect the bag. “Dude?”

Sam turned to him, opening up a bottle of water. Before he took a sip, he asked, “What?”

“Where’s the pie?”

All of the color drained from Sam’s face. “Sorry, man. I forgot.”

Dean rolled his eyes and dramatically threw his hands up. “Fucking really, Sam? Didn’t I tell you just this morning how you always forget?!”

“It’s only pie, Dean. You can go to the grocery store and pick up some pie.”

Dean was louder than what was truly necessary at this point. “That’s not the point! I speci…”

“Will you boys shut the hell up! Some of us are trying to relax after a long damn day,” Bobby hollered from the other room.

“Bobby, you guys forgot the pie again,” Dean hollered back.

“Well, boo-hoo. I’m **so** sorry your feelings are hurt, princess. Now, can you stop your hollering? I’m trying to watch my program.”

Dean could still hear him mumbling something from the other room and just rolled his eyes.

Dean pointed his finger at Sam. “I’m not forgetting this.”

“Again, it’s just pie,” Sam mumbled.

Dean glared at Sam, then walked to his room with his burger and fries. While he devoured his burger, he watched reruns of Dr. Sexy on Netflix. He didn’t want his brother, or Bobby for that matter, knowing about his guilty pleasure, so he kept the volume on low. After he finished watching an episode or two of it, he took the garbage into the kitchen and grabbed a packet of Oreos from the pantry. _Doesn’t even come close to replacing pie. Fucking bitch._ He shoved the cookies into his mouth like a squirrel while he poured himself a glass of milk. He finished it quickly, then went to the bathroom to take a shower and brush his teeth. When he walked over to the sink, he grasped the porcelain sides with both hands and looked at himself in the mirror. It had been a long day, but he had color in his cheeks. For the past three weeks, he had looked gaunt. His first week at Five Towns had been an absolute nightmare. He had just come down from having severe withdrawals. He only had himself to blame for that mistake. He looked down at his arms. The track marks were slowly starting to fade from his skin, mere shadows of the wrong he had done. Physical scars were only half the battle. He looked back into the mirror and hated the person looking back at him. Four weeks ago, he would have punched the mirror. Anything to not look at himself. He was trying to be better, to do better, but every time he looked at himself in the mirror, he only saw all the wrong he had done. He quickly faced away from the mirror, then turned on the water for the shower.

As he waited for the shower to heat up, he brushed his teeth quickly and watched his face slowly disappear from the mirror as the steam from the shower filled the room. He rinsed his mouth, then stepped into the shower. He let the water cascade over his skin for a minute or two before he ran his fingers through his hair and let his head fall back. Showers always had a way of relaxing him, especially after the long day he’d just had. He needed this. He scrubbed his hair, borrowing some of Sam’s special Moroccan Oil shampoo. _He forgot my pie. He’ll deal until I can get to the store._ He would never admit to Sam that he preferred his shampoo over his own. It smelled better and made his hair feel softer.

He let his hands drift over his smooth skin with his bar of soap. He knew some people who shared soap bars with their family. That was just unsanitary. He scrubbed himself even harder with that thought in mind, almost drawing blood. Once he was rinsed, he turned off the water, then grabbed his fluffy towel from the rack and dried himself off. It was a luxury having things like this towel, especially considering what his life had been like from the time his mother died to a few months after his fifteenth birthday. The only amount of normalcy he ever had when he was growing up were the weekends he and Sam spent time with Pastor Jim or Bobby. He loved living with Bobby. The guy may look like a redneck, but there was no one else on this earth, including Dr. Morrison, who knew more about mythology and history. He was fluent in Japanese, could fix and rebuild a car from the ground up, and he was the best father Dean could ever ask for. He only wished that… Dean took a deep breath and absentmindedly rubbed the scars on his shoulders that a particular sperm donor, as Dean liked to call him, gave him on his fifteenth birthday. If it weren’t for Bobby, he would probably still be in the system and separated from Sammy. He fought for six months to adopt them from his biological father, John. A week after John signed the papers, he was dead. Drunk driving, right into a tree, smashing Dean's poor baby to hell. Bobby made a promise to Dean that they could fix her up and make her better than new. He wasn’t lying. When they moved from Sioux Falls to Long Island, Bobby even had it shipped to his new shop so they could finish working on it. The guy was a friggin saint. He was surly as hell, but he was a good man.

He finished drying off, then made his way back to his room with his towel wrapped around his hips. He didn’t bother getting dressed in pajamas. He just threw the towel on the ground and crawled into bed. He put in his headphones, turned on some Led Zeppelin, then closed his eyes and let the music wash over him. As he allowed his mind to roam free, his thoughts landed on the pair of blue eyes and unruly hair which owned most of his thoughts the entire day. He smiled and slowly drifted off into a deep sleep.


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments are welcomed :)

Dean woke up well rested with a smile on his face. His alarm still hadn’t gone off, so he quickly turned it off before it could. For some reason, he felt that when he was awakened by his alarm, he didn’t want to get up. So, unlike many, he was always happy when he woke up before it. He put his robe on, then went to the bathroom to brush his teeth. After rinsing with some Listerine, he put some product in his hair to style it. Once he completed a little inspection, he decided he looked good enough, then went to his room to dress.

Considering what he wore the day before, he felt it would probably be a good idea to at least try and look a little bit more professional that day. He pulled out a pair of gunmetal gray slacks and a powder blue collared shirt. He left the top two buttons undone and folded his sleeves up to his elbows. Then, he tucked in the shirt, put on a leather belt, and slipped his feet into a pair of black leather oxfords which matched his belt. As he checked himself out in the mirror, he couldn’t help but wonder what Cas would think of his appearance. _Guys eyes will probably fall out of his head_ , he laughed to himself. With one final once-over he figured,  _Yeah, that'll do._ He grabbed his keys, his guitar case along with a backpack he filled with some of the materials he received the previous day from Mick and Rufus, then made his way to the front door.

“Well, someone is looking dapper today. What’s the occasion?” Bobby asked while drinking a cup of coffee, standing in the doorway to the kitchen.

Dean put down his guitar case by the front door and walked towards Bobby. “Did you make enough for the three of us?” He moved past Bobby, not waiting for him to answer.

“Of course I did.” He turned back towards Dean. “So, again, you’re dressed nicely. Why?”

“Well, I looked like a schmuck yesterday. Thought I might as well try to look nice today.” He shrugged, pouring himself a mug of the gods’ nectar.

“Well, it’s good to see you tryin’, son.” Bobby gave him a sincere smile.

He gave Bobby a small grin. “Thanks, Bobby. I am. Trying that is.” 

“I know.” He gave him a pat on the back.

“You taking Sam? And why are you not opening the shop today?”

“Yeah, I’m taking him. We're both going to the same place. And I deserve a day to sleep in a little later. I had one of the guys open for me. You got a problem with that?”

“No. Not at all.” He took a sip of the coffee. “Shit! What coffee is this? It’s fucking awesome!”

“Ellen got me a couple of pounds of Colombian dark roast beans from Fairway. I ground them myself. You like it?”

“‘It’s fucking awesome' kinda explains my feelings about it. I was gonna stop and pick up some Strathmore, but I am not gonna waste my time after coffee like this." He stepped over to the freezer. "We got any bagels in the fridge?” 

“'Fraid not. You may have to go to Strathmore after all. Get me a bagel while you’re at it. Sam will probably want one, too.” Bobby finished his coffee.

“Are you kidding me? That hippie would never want a bagel the way we get them.”

Almost as if Sam could hear them, he showed up fully dressed in the kitchen, grabbing a mug from the cabinet.

“Hey, Sammy?”

Sam turned to look at Dean.

“Do you want a bagel? I’m going to Strathmore before school,” Dean added.

“No, I have papaya I’d like to eat. You look nice today. Who’re you trying to impress?” Sam raised his eyebrows and motioned his head towards his brother's outfit as he brought the mug to his lips.

“Can’t I just want to look nice for work?” Dean shook his head. Of course, he would never admit work wasn’t the only reason why he wanted to look good. He put his mug in the sink. “Well, I’m off. See you guys at the school.” He waved goodbye, then shut the door behind him.

After he put his guitar and backpack in the trunk, he looked at his watch. _6:03._ Plenty of time to get something at Strathmore and spend some time in the auditorium again.

Of course, there was a line at the bagel shop. He got himself and Bobby a bagel and grabbed a blueberry muffin with some tea for Ellen. On the way to the school, he ate his bagel and tried not to get egg yolk on himself or his Baby. When he finally got to the school, it was around the same time as the day before. He greeted Ellen with the treats.

“What do you want, Dean?” she questioned with a stern face.

“Could I borrow the keys again?” He tried to give her the puppy dog eyes and boo-boo lip Sam was an expert at giving.

“Continue to bring me treats like this every morning you’re here and you can borrow them every time.” She handed him the keys.

He gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks, Ellen. I’ll bring them back like yesterday. Oh, and this one is for Bobby.” He handed her the bag holding Bobby’s bagel.

“Go, will ya. I have shit to do.” She waved him off.

After he texted Bobby letting him know where his bagel was, he went through the same process as he did the day before. He turned on the spotlight, sat at the edge of the stage, then strummed on his guitar’s strings a few times before he settled on a song. “It is the springtime of my loving, the second season I am to know” A little Led Zeppelin never hurt anyone. He felt more like playing today than singing anyway and "The Rain Song" was perfect for that. “Speak to me only with your eyes. It is to you I give this tune. Ain't so hard to recognize. These things are clear to all from time to time.” He let the poetry of the music and lyrics leave him as he finished the song. “Upon us all, upon us all, a little rain must fall. It's just a little rain, oh yeah.”

When the was over, he checked his watch. _6:54. Don’t have to rush as much today._ He packed up his guitar and put it at the back of the auditorium, then made his way back to the lighting booth. Once everything was turned off and the door was locked behind him, he reached the front auditorium doors and paused. He knew Cas would be there. He had a sneaking suspicion that, just like him, Cas had a favorite spot to go to every morning. _Do I slam it open? Or do I open it quietly?_ He decided on the former and made as much noise as he could.

His favorite admirer nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound of the auditorium doors. He couldn’t help but smile. Jo saw him exit and glared at him. He gave her a little wave. She rolled her eyes and turned back to the kid Rufus had called Andy the day before. He moseyed over to Cas and looked down at him. He could tell Cas was trying his hardest to act like he didn’t hear the door, but decided to disturb him anyway. He kicked his left shoe to get his attention. One sparkling blue eye opened and looked up at him. When Cas bent his head down to take out his headphones, Dean couldn’t help but smile at the reactions he consistently seemed to pull out of Cas.

“Good morning,” Cas greeted.

The poor guy was clearly exhausted, but Dean couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. He couldn’t help it around him for some reason. Honestly, deep down he knew he had been looking forward to this moment since the moment he fell asleep the night before. There was something about Cas. He just couldn’t put his finger on it. He gave the guy a quick once-over. _An AC/DC shirt today… hmm, maybe he’s not a complete dork after all._ “Hey, Cas. Didn’t mean to startle you. Thought I’d be nice and say hi and sorry.” He knew he should probably dial back on the smile a bit, but Cas’ reaction to said smile did not make it easy to stop.

The kid’s entire face lit up like the early morning sun. “It’s okay. Can I expect you to make a ruckus like that every morning you’re here?”

Cas raised an eyebrow at him and he could feel his body react to that small change in his expression. _Getting turned on by a raised eyebrow… God, I need to fuck. Maybe…_ He kicked that thought out of his head immediately. _No. This kid deserves better than that._ “Are you saying I like attention or something?” he jested.

Cas tilted his head to the right, his expression filled with complete sincerity “No, I’m just saying this is the second morning you have exited the auditorium in such a manner. I’m inquiring as to whether this is a pattern of behavior.”

“Maybe I’m just clumsy,” he smirked.

“Highly unlikely,” Cas said while slightly rolling his eyes.

 _You wanna play? Let’s play._ He pursed his lips and watched Cas’ eyes follow his tongue as he wet his lips, then held his gaze. _Oh, this is too easy._ “Or maybe I just like seeing you squirm.” He winked at him and gave him a wicked grin.

Cas’ jaw dropped.

_That’s what I wanted._

“Excuse me?” he asked breathlessly.

He really did want nothing more than to watch this guy squirm. _Maybe even beneath me, suck him off until he begs me to fuck him. Yeah._ “You heard me. Later, Cas.” He gave him one final smile, making his intentions clear. Cas’ shocked expression filled with desire would be on his mind for the rest of the morning. He couldn’t deny it any longer. He wanted him, no matter how wrong it was.

 

>>>>>>

 

“ _You better promise me, I’ll be back in time.”_

Castiel glared at his alarm, willing it to shut up. He was already up, of course. Had been for hours, tossing and turning. He swiped left on the screen to shut it off.

 _Dropping out is still an option, right?_ he thought while rubbing his eyes with his fists.

He went to the bathroom, making sure he was silent. He heard Gabriel come in at one am. He didn’t want to be an ass two mornings in a row. He closed the door, turned on the water, then started his morning routine. When he got back to his room, he decided to wear another band t-shirt. This time he went with a black AC/DC shirt with his usual jeans and Chucks. He packed his gym clothes, then ran upstairs to shovel eggs down his throat before sprinting out the front door to catch the bus.

When he got to the school, he went to his usual spot, put his back up against the art case, and slowly slid to the ground until his body hit the floor. He bent his legs and rested his forearms on his knees. Then, he let his head fell back onto the case and closed his eyes.

He sat like that for a few minutes, listening to music, until he was startled by the sound of the auditorium door slamming. _Please, dear God in heaven, don’t be him again. Not now. Not today._

He shut his eyes again quickly, hoping whoever it was didn’t notice him when he felt someone softly kick his left foot.

Castiel took a deep breath and opened only his left eye towards whoever kicked him. Sure enough, Dean’s emerald eyes were smiling down at him. He gave him a quick overview. _God, he looks good enough to eat today. How is that fair?_ He was dressed in more professional attire, but he couldn’t hide the well-muscled physique that was lying beneath it. _He probably looks like "The David" underneath those clothes._ He turned his face to the floor trying to gather some strength, then took out his headphones before he looked up at Dean. He smiled without it reaching his eyes. “Good morning.”

“Hey, Cas. Didn’t mean to startle you. Thought I’d be nice and say hi and sorry.” Dean had a genuine **_I’m happy to see you_** grin on his face.

The smile helped brighten his mood a bit. He started to mirror Dean’s expression. “It’s okay. Can I expect you to make a ruckus like that every morning you’re here?” he inquired, raising an eyebrow at him.

“Are you saying I like attention or something?” Dean asked, feigning offense.

“No, I’m just saying this is the second morning you have exited the auditorium in such a manner. I’m inquiring as to whether this is a pattern of behavior.” He was serious about this. If this gorgeous specimen was going to be making him jump out of his skin every morning he was at the school, he’d like to be prepared.

“Maybe I’m just clumsy,” he professed with a smirk.

“Highly unlikely.” Castiel scoffed.

Dean shrugged and gave Castiel a once-over. Dean pursed his lips, wetting first his top, then his bottom lip before he locked eyes with him. “Or maybe I just like seeing you squirm,” he suggested, then winked at him with a flirtatious grin.

Castiel’s jaw dropped. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me. Later, Cas,” he replied, giving him a lascivious grin. Without another word, he turned around and walked towards the music corridor.

Castiel mouth was still open when Charlie bounded up to him wearing a Hobbit shirt with her skirt, striped tights, and boots. “Hey, Bestie!!! What’s with the face? Trying to catch flies or something?”

He shook his head to clear it and shut his mouth. “Sorry. I was caught off guard by Dean. I think he was flirting with me just now. I could be wrong. I don’t think I am,” he muttered staring at nothing in particular.

“Oh, really?” Charlie kneeled down next to Castiel. “What did he say?” Again with the fluttering lashes she had yesterday.

He glared at her through squinted eyes. “Sometimes I hate you.”

Charlie huffed with derision, “You love me,” and laughed.

“Yeah. You’re lucky I do.” He paused by taking a deep breath. “Apparently, he likes making me squirm.”

Charlie’s face mirrored Castiel’s earlier expression. “He said he likes making you squirm?” She shut her mouth and started shaking her head while giggling. “Oh, boy. Yeah. That was definitely flirting.”

“But why? Why me? I’m nothing amazing. Plus, I’m seventeen and he’s, what, twenty? Isn’t that illegal or something? Plus, he’s a teacher!” Castiel started hyperventilating. He was not expecting this much drama this early.

Charlie grabbed Castiel‘s shoulders and made him look at her. “Castiel, relax. Deep breaths.” She took a few breaths with him and started rubbing his back while looking him in the eye. “One, you are special. If I hear you say you’re not one more time, I’m gonna hit you. Two, it is not illegal and you’re going to be eighteen in a little over three months. Three, he is not a teacher. He is just fulfilling his college credits by being here this year,” she declared calmly.

“Yeah, but he could get in trouble. I could get in trouble. Oh, God! What if I get expelled? What if…” He started freaking out. This time, he stood up and threw his hands in the air while looking down at Charlie who was laughing at him. “What is so friggin funny?”

She was laughing so hard she was shaking. “You are! Dude, nothing has happened and you are acting like it’s the end of the world. He was just flirting. That’s it. Calm down.”

Castiel was ready to chastise Charlie for her remarks when the warning bell rang. “Later, Shurley!” She waved as she started walking towards the language corridor.

Castiel huffed, grabbed his backpack, then made his way to statistics.

The first four periods were a blur. By the time he sat down at his usual spot in the Music Theory classroom, Castiel felt like he was going to heave. He was anticipating seeing Dean there and he didn’t know what to expect. The same questions repeated in his head for most of the morning. _What if I turn into a babbling idiot again like I did at band yesterday? What if I turn red and can’t speak again? GOD! WHY IS HE ABLE TO DO THIS TO ME?!?!_

He was pleased to see only Mr. Turner standing in the front of the classroom. _Oh, thank Jesus! Maybe he won’t be in here today._

He started to breathe easier. He grabbed his staff book and pencil from his backpack, then put it on the piano in front of him. He decided to take his water bottle out and take a quick sip while looking at one of the posters on the wall next to him. “Hi, Cas.”

Castiel jumped out of his seat, dropped the water bottle, and started choking. Luckily, the water bottle landed on its bottom, so it didn’t make a mess. _Shit, I couldn’t do that again if I tried!_

Dean leaned over and started to pat him on the back while laughing. “Geez, dude. I was just saying hi.”

“You” {cough} “caught me” {cough} “off guard.” He coughed two more times and was finally able to breathe normally. “Don’t sneak up on me like that!”

Dean, who was still laughing, put his hands up. “Sorry, man. Next time I’ll wear a collar with a bell or something.”

“No, just let me see you first. You don’t have to wear a bell,” he pointed out with a slight look of disbelief that anyone would wear a bell.

“You do recognize sarcasm when you hear it, right?” Dean chuckled.

“Oh, you were joking.” He felt like an idiot. “Duh.” Castiel sat back down, then began to reorganize himself and his stuff.

Dean looked down at him. “So, I was going to ask if I could sit at the piano next to you because I’m observing this class today, but…” he trailed off. “Actually, screw it, I’m sitting here.” He plopped down at the piano next to him with the notebook and pencil he was holding, leaned back, then crossed his arms over his chest.

Castiel looked over at him with astonishment. He didn’t know what to do or say anymore. _This guy was put on this earth to torture me. I know it. He was sent to torment me._

“Dude, did you hear anything I just said?” Dean asked while waving a hand in front of Castiel’s face. “Yo, earth to Cas?”

“What did you say?” he asked, shaking his head to clear it. Wasn’t the first time that day he had to do it either.

“I asked you if you’re in band again today? Or do you have chorus or orchestra?” Dean inquired while raising an eyebrow at him again.

The bell rang. “Chorus,” Castiel answered quickly. The last thing he wanted was for Mr. Turner to catch him talking while he was.

Dean nodded his head in understanding, almost looking disappointed.

Castiel tried to pay attention to Mr. Turner. He really did. However, he could see Dean in his peripherals and it was very distracting. He could swear on a few occasions he saw Dean looking at him. He came to the conclusion he was obviously imagining it because when he would steal a glance at him, Dean was always looking forward or writing something down.

When the bell rang, Castiel started packing up his things so he could head to the gym. He turned to his right to say goodbye to Dean, but he was at the front of the room talking to Mr. Turner. Castiel shrugged and left.

He turned left and started walking down the math corridor towards the gym. _God, I’m such an idiot._

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean couldn’t help but look at Cas throughout Music Theory. He had trouble admitting to himself the real reason. He could tell himself it was because the guy was hot, but, deep down, he knew it was because this would be the last time he would see him today. He couldn’t explain it, but it made the rest of the day feel like a waste of his time. Cas, apparently, was one of the students who alternated between Band and Chorus every other day. It made him wonder what Cas’ singing voice sounded like. _He’s probably a bass with a deep voice like his. He probably sounds like Leonard Cohen. Or maybe he’s a Baritone like David Bowie._

He could sense Cas knew he was looking at him. Every time he saw Cas steal a glance at him, he would quickly act like he was writing something in the notebook he really should be taking notes in or looking at Rufus. Dean knew he could act like he had been paying attention later on with Rufus because he took three years of this course just like Cas.

When the bell rang he looked at Cas one last time while he was packing up his things, then sighed. _Guess I’ll see you Friday…_ The thought depressed him more than he cared to admit. _Just want him for one thing, huh, Dean?_ He shook his head to clear it, then walked up to Rufus with the little notes he did take. “Hey, Rufus, I was wondering about the composition project you are working on with them. Do you…”

Rufus was holding up a hand to silence him. “Look, you’re here to do a job and learn from us, right?”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed. “Yeah. Obviously.” _What’s he getting at?_

“Then leave that kid alone.”

His eyes widened in shock. “What?”

“Leave Castiel alone. That kid has been through enough. Leave him alone.”

“I wasn’t…”

“Yeah, you always weren’t, right? I remember the way you were in high school. He’s a good kid. Extremely talented. You should have seen him the first time he came in here. Nearly had a panic attack stepping in front of that piano. He’s been through enough without you coming in here to bring him down. Knock it off.” He glared at Dean, a fire burning brightly in his eyes.

“I really wasn’t…”

“I saw the way he looked at you yesterday and the little exchange you guys had when you came into the classroom. I’m not gonna ask you again. Got it?” Rufus poked him hard in the chest with his final question.

Dean rubbed his chest. “Yeah. Got it. Leave him alone.”

“Good. Now, what’s this bullshit you want to talk to me about?” He looked down at Dean’s notes.

They went over the project and a couple of other subjects before he made his way to Ellen’s office for lunch with Bobby. He knew not to expect Sam because he would be in the cafeteria with one of the Banes twins, Alicia. When he opened the office door, Bobby and Ellen were already digging into whatever Ellen brought in that day. Chicken salad. Not his favorite, but he grabbed a sandwich and tucked in.

They didn’t talk much. Bobby was annoyed that he was going to have to once again reorganize the tools in the school shop after the ninth period because as he put it, “Schools filled with a bunch of idjits that don’t know the difference between a wrench and a ratchet.” Ellen talked about the Kickline/Color Guard team and how the girls were complaining about holding practice in the cafeteria on Wednesdays instead of out on the field. Coach Adler demanded that he should be able to have the field on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for as long as he wants. Of course, Principal Roman agreed to it and Vice Principal Crowley couldn’t be bothered, so the girls had to suffer as per usual.

The rest of the day was fairly boring until right before the ninth period when he ran into Sam before he was meant to go into Orchestra. “Hey, Sammy! How’s your day going?”

“Fan-fucking-tastic,” he scowled.

“Wow, that good, huh?” Dean’s eyebrows shot to the ceiling.

“I need to go to the library to pick up the Zodiac Killer book I reserved, but Kevin has cello lessons today, so he and his mom are busy. Bobby told me he has something he has to finish up here. Then, he has to go to the shop to lock up because he didn’t open this morning. Originally, he promised to take me today before he had to go to the shop, but apparently whatever he has to take care of here is going to take up too much of his time. So, I need a ride to the library. Can you take me?” He looked at Dean with the puppy dog eyes.

“I don’t know, Sammy. I got stuff I have to do around here after school, as well. The field has to be cleaned up by 2:30 at the latest for the football team and Mick wanted to go over a few things before he dismisses me today because he won’t see me until Friday. So, I’m gonna be a bit. Sorry.” Dean shrugged.

“Dean, I really want this book. I’ve been waiting for over a month for it to come in,” Sam griped.

“Why couldn’t you just download the PDF online like the rest of us? You could have…”

Sam glared at him.

He knew how Sam felt about books. Something about the smell and the feel of them or some shit. The nerdy weirdo. “Sammy, you’re gonna have to stay after if you want a ride to the library.”

“Dean, the library closes at five today. They haven’t changed their hours yet. Do you have an idea as to how long you’ll have to be here?” Sam was pleading with him, face etched with despair.

“I don’t know.” Dean was quickly becoming irritated. _I got shit I’d like to do, too._ “Probably 3:00 or 3:30.”

“Ugh. Fine,” Sam groaned, rolling his eyes. “As long as it’s only until 3:30. I don’t want to wait another day.”

“Fine. Later, Bitch,” Dean huffed and turned towards the math hall to get to the football field so he could set things up before the band got there.

Sammy hollered after him, “Jerk.”

He turned around to glare at Sam, but he had already entered the orchestra room. He looked past him and caught a glance of Castiel’s wild dark hair heading into the choir room. He turned around, disappointed that he didn’t get a glimpse of the effulgent sapphire orbs he was quickly becoming addicted to. _Keep walking, Dean. You were told to leave him alone._

 

>>>>>>

 

Gym was probably his least favorite class. He hated Coach Adler. The guy was a serious douchebag and that was putting it nicely. He hated looking at his shiny bald head and his insidious smile. He was elated that he at least had Charlie with him, especially since Alastair and Brady were going to be in the same gym class with him. Apparently, the school district was quick to forget what happened the last time the three of them shared a gym class together. Of course, they were never convicted of the crime, so why should it matter to them whether or not they were in the same class? _Fuck my life._

Coach Adler lackadaisical informed the class that for the first quarter they will be using the weight room. He could hear everyone’s sigh of relief. It left them the freedom to do their own training. Castiel and Charlie would usually walk on the treadmill for the thirty minutes or use the elliptical. Everyone’s relief was short lived when he followed up, with an overjoyed expression, that the second quarter would be swimming.

Castiel hated swimming. He already felt uncomfortable as it was using the locker rooms. Using the pool locker room was even worse. The assumption all gay men want to have sex in the showers or stare at people while they bathe made his life miserable. Usually, he would towel off in a bathroom stall, get dressed, then run out. He hated spending the rest of his day smelling like chlorine, but the less time he spent in the locker room the better, especially considering what happened in the locker room after school in the eighth grade. He wasn’t the same scrawny kid anymore, he had spent many hours training to make sure of that, but he didn’t trust those assholes.

Coach Adler dismissed them after listening to himself speak for thirty-five minutes. Castiel quickly changed in the locker room before saying goodbye to Charlie at the gym doors, then headed for the stairs to go to AP World History.

AP History and College Italian were enjoyable. Still, Castiel was so excited to see his choir teacher, Ms. Moseley, he didn’t really care what Dr. Morrison or Ms. Talbot had to say.

He was already out of his seat when the ninth period bell rang. He ran to meet his friends Inias and Rachel. Both of them were talking merrily amongst themselves when Castiel met them at the entrance to the art corridor. “Hey, guys!” Castiel announced putting an arm around both their shoulders.

“Hiya, Castiel! You excited about Concert Choir?!” Rachel exclaimed with a huge grin.

“Well, duh!” he laughed. Castiel put his arms back down to his sides as they walked past the cafeteria and were closer to the Choir room. Inias opened the door for Rachel and Castiel, but Castiel froze.

“Sammy, you’re gonna have to stay after if you want a ride to the library.” At this point, he would know that voice anywhere.

“Dean, the library closes at five today. They haven’t changed their hours yet. Do you have an idea as to how long you’ll have to be here?” He looked to his right to see Dean talking to a kid who was way too tall for his age with a mop of brown hair.

“I don’t know probably 3:00 or 3:30.”

Castiel watched with interest.

“Ugh. Fine! As long as it’s only until 3:30. I don’t want to wait another day.”

“Fine. Later, Bitch.” Dean huffed and started walking away towards the math corridor, probably on his way to the football field.

“Jerk.” The kid Dean called Sammy snapped, then went into the Orchestra room.

“Castiel, are you coming or what? I’m not your slave. I’ve been holding this door for like five minutes,” Inias complained.

“Stop whining. You’re exaggerating,” he said, rolling his eyes at Inias.

He strolled over to where the Baritones usually sat. Even though Castiel had a deep speaking voice, he had a wide vocal range. Ms. Moseley stuck him in the Baritone section because she honestly didn’t know where else to put him.

After putting his bag down next to Inias, he faced towards Ms. Moseley’s office and saw her looking over a few pieces of paper as she took a sip of her herbal tea. He trotted over with a huge smile on his face. He knocked on the door frame to get her attention. Her face instantly lit up. “Castiel! Honey! Come here!”

He walked over to her and gave her a huge hug. “Hi, Ms. Moseley! I missed you!” He stepped back and smiled down at her. “How’s Patience? She’s in tenth grade now, right?”

“She’s fine, sweetie. She’s like her ol’ grandma. Her daddy doesn’t like it, but I don’t care what my son thinks. The girl is a miracle. It was a blessing being able to spend the summer with her. How are you, Castiel? You’ve grown.”

“Yeah, I’m almost six feet tall now. I had to go shopping for new clothes before school started. Which was a blast, let me tell you.” He rolled his eyes.

“Well, growing out of your clothes is part of growing up.” She searched his face. “Is there something else going on, too?”

 _How does she always know?_ “No.”

“You know, I don’t believe you for a second. How’s school going? Those boys haven’t been messin’ with you again, have they?” She looked at him with obvious concern.

He shook his head and looked at his feet. “No. I wouldn’t let them even if they tried.”

“Who is he?”

He looked up into her earnest eyes. “No one.”

She gave him a knowing look.

“Do you know who Dean Winchester is?”

“Yes, I was his choir teacher for three years.” She shook her head and pursed her lips. “I heard he was going to be here this semester.” The bell rang. She looked out at the sea of students in the choir room before she looked back at him. “We need to talk, Castiel. Don’t leave after class.” She gave him another hug. “Now, go take a seat.”

He gave her a puzzled expression wondering what that could mean, but she just pointed in the general direction of the baritone section.

Once he took his seat next to Inias, Ms. Moseley started to make her announcements. “Good afternoon, everyone. I still have to place most of you in your sections. As I said yesterday, seniors will not be auditioned again because I already know where ya’ll go. Now, when I call your name, please come stand next to me at the piano so I can listen to ya. Those who aren’t singing, please keep your voices down. No cussing. And no, Seniors, you cannot leave early. You do have a reason to be here.” Some of the seniors gave her questioning looks. “You didn’t have to say it. I knew you was thinkin it.” She started to call names off her clipboard to begin the auditions.

Castiel spent most of the class talking with Inias and Rachel. They talked about their new classes and their summers. Inias spent his summer in the Hamptons with his family. Rachel was in Maine with hers.

When the bell rang, Castiel said goodbye to Rachel and Inias, then walked over to Ms. Moseley as the room cleared out. She pointed to her office. He walked over to it, then sat down in the chair in front of her desk.

A couple of minutes later, she walked in, shut the door behind her, then sat down at her desk. “So, Dean Winchester, huh?”

Castiel trusted Ms. Moseley. She was like a second mother to him. He told her everything.

She sat there listening patiently until Castiel finished. “Honey?”

He looked into her espresso brown eyes.

“The reason I wanted to talk to you is 'cause I knew this was probably what was happening. He was always like this in high school. He had everyone falling all over him. The boy is a flirt. Plain and simple. His good looks and smooth talkin’ have always won people over. Maybe I’m wrong. Usually, I’m not. But he’s probably just teasing you like he used to do in high school to anyone who’d give him that look. And, sweetie, you’ve got that look when you talk about him.”

“I was afraid of that.” He looked down at his knotted fingers. “I thought maybe…” He shook his head and looked up at Ms. Moseley with a sweet smile. “You know, you’re right. I had a feeling this was exactly what he was all about.”

“Honey, I’m sorry. I wish I had better news for ya about him.” Her apology was more than sincere which made it all that much worse.

“It’s ok. I’ll get over it.” He rubbed his sweaty palms against the thighs of his jeans before he stood up. “Thank you, Ms. Moseley. I appreciate everything you always do for me. Thank you for warning me. It’s only one semester, right?” He huffed out a short laugh.

“Well, I hope it goes smoothly for ya. If you have any trouble with him, let me know. Okay, sugar?” She stood up and gave him a quick hug. “Now, go on. I’ll see you Friday.”

Castiel gave her a small smile and made his way to the guidance office.

Castiel knew Ms. Mills always tried to stay at least an hour after the final bell at the beginning of the year for students who might have some questions or additional needs. When he walked into the Guidance Counselor office, she was more than a little surprised to see him. “Hi, Castiel. Not that I’m not happy to see you, but what are you doing here?”

“I want to drop a class and perhaps pick up a new one to replace it.” He shrugged.

“Okay. Come into my office and we’ll see what we can do.” She motioned her arm towards her office.

Castiel followed her to the door that said "Ms. Jody Mills", then looked around as she sat down at her desk. She had a picture of her daughter, Alex, on her desk and some other family photos on the wall behind where Castiel was going to sit. She had a wall full of college brochures to her right, a bookcase filled with literature she surely had read for her role as Guidance Counselor to her left, and a large window behind her which had a perfect view of the school’s garden.

“So, which class are you looking to drop?” she asked putting her elbows on her desk and clasping her hands together.

“I want to drop AP Statistics. It’s during the first period. I was hoping there may be another class I can take to fill its place. I really don’t want to have a study hall first thing in the morning.”

“Hmmm, let’s see what we got.” Ms. Mills looked at her computer screen trying to figure out what she could do for him. After a minute or so, she grimaced at her screen. “I’m not sure. You may have to. Unless, would you want to take Introduction to Automotive Care with Mr. Singer?”

Castiel shrugged. “To be honest, anything is better than AP Statistics at this point.”

Ms. Mills blinked a few times in shock. “Wow! Okay. It’s in the technology corridor all the way in the back of the school. It’s the second door on the right.” She examined the screen and clicked on her mouse a few times before she addressed him again with a pondering gaze. “Are you sure, Castiel? This really isn’t your kind of thing. You have a pretty full class load. Why not use the first period as a study hall?”

“I would fall asleep. I’m not much of a morning person. Plus, it’s not like I’m not going to eventually need a car. Why not learn how to take care of it, ya know?” He shrugged noncommittally.

“Well, you do have a point. I’ll add you to Mr. Singer’s class roster and shoot him an email letting him know he has a new student to prepare for tomorrow. It’s good to see you, Castiel. Visit me next week and let me know how everything is going, okay?” she added before reaching out her hand for Castiel to shake.

He took it and thanked her.

 _Anything is better than AP Statistics? What am I, a moron?_ He chastised himself as he walked towards the cafeteria. _Maybe the Kickline/Color Guard team won’t mind me being there until the after school buses show._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The squirm comment and water bottle incident actually happened to me. Both situations were embarrassing as hell.


	5. Chapter Five

Watching the marching band without Castiel, there was like trying to swim in a pool with no water. It didn’t make sense. On the bright side, he spent the entire period doing his job. Which, of course, consisted of him taking notes and taking orders from Mick and Rufus. When they heard the final bell ring, signifying the end of the school day, everyone was dismissed, and Dean got to work clearing the field. It took him around fifteen minutes. Just in time, too. The football team was making their way out to the field.

With the band equipment bag slung over his left shoulder, he started to make his way towards the building until he heard a familiar voice that made his skin crawl.

“Dean?”

Dean turned around and was met by a hauntingly familiar sneer that held his gaze. _Alastair?_ Lily’s cousin and his old dealer, who at that moment, apparently, thought it was a good idea to greet him, sauntered over to him in his football gear. _Fuck my life! Seriously? This kid goes here? Of course, he fucking does..._

“Dean, Dean, Dean. Never expected to see you here. Gotta say... I’ve missed you. Haven’t heard from you lately. I know Lily has missed you, too.”

Dean bowed his head and closed his eyes while he shook his head. _I can’t deal with this bullshit right now._ “Look, Al, I’ve got stuff to do around here. Plus, I don’t do that shit anymore. So, if you don’t mind, I have work to do.”

Alastair grabbed his arm tighter than what he felt was frankly necessary as he went to walk away. “You had such promise, Dean. You’ll be back. You’ll always be chasing after that dragon. It’s only a matter of time.”

Dean ripped his arm away with enough force to throw Alastair off balance. “No. I won’t. So, fuck off!” Dean stormed off towards the school. He heard Alastair laughing as he shouted something else at him, but he couldn’t hear him. He could only hear the high pitch ringing of blood rushing through his veins and his erratic breathing. The sky was crumbling down upon him, trying to suffocate him as he made his way towards the school gym. Finally, reaching the brick of the building wall, he held onto the structure for dear life. He believed him. Every word. _You know he’s right. It’s only a matter of time before you fuck up again and run back to it. Back to her._ He took a few deep breaths and entered the school, making a beeline towards the bathroom near the weight room. He leaned over the sink and turned on the tap. Usually, throwing the frigid liquid onto his face would calm his nerves.

He ran his right hand down the length of his face and glowered at the man in the mirror before turning away in disgust. His mind was a sea of torment where he was once again drowning in the memories of what he had done. The encounter with his old dealer was forcing him to confront the unforgiving memories of the blissful euphoria the H running through his veins used to cause him. The sleepless nights spent in the empty delirium of sex and drugs. All with Lily by his side. Her long blonde hair and wicked smile shining through the haze of his stupor. Her seafoam eyes were enticing him to take one more hit. The feeling of her mouth, of being comfortably numb from the poison she had filled his life with. The poison which the son of a bitch outside had supplied for them.

His blood boiled with rage. He took a few heavy breaths trying to steady the soreness of his mistakes. No matter how many breaths he took, he couldn’t control the storm from brewing. Something snapped inside of him, and he punched the wall next to the mirror. He felt nothing. Or at least, he wanted to feel nothing. He judged the face in the mirror once more. The monster looked back, mocking him with a scowl. He looked down at his hand and saw blood dripping from his knuckles. _Fuck!_  He washed his hands and wrapped it in paper towels.

He left the bathroom and turned left towards the nurse’s office.

Nurse Case was still there. She looked up from her desk and smiled. “Hello.” Noticing his hand, she inquired, “What happened there?”

“Had a fight with a badger.” He held up his hand. “I won. I escaped with just some minor flesh wounds.” He looked down at his hand, then glanced back at Nurse Case. “Can I… umm… Can I have some gauze to wrap my hand with?” He requested as he walked closer to her.

“Let’s have a look, shall we?” She put on a pair of gloves and removed the paper towels. She tsked, “A badger, huh?” She raised an eyebrow at him.

“Yup,” he deadpanned.

She shook her head and snickered. She went to work cleaning his hand and patching him up, not saying a word as she did. When she finished, she laid her hand on his and gave him a soft smile. “Whatever you’re upset about, it’s not worth hurting yourself like this.” She gave the back of his hand a light pat and stood up. “Now, off you get. I should be home by now anyway.”

“Uh, thanks.” He got up and put the bag back over his shoulder and made his way back to the music hallway so he could be dismissed for the day. He looked at his watch. _3:09. Fuck!_ He bolted towards the band room.

 

>>>>>>

 

The girls of the team didn’t mind him being there. He sat in his usual spot by the vending machines doing some homework until Meg came in and sat next to him. “What are you doing here?”

“Well, nice to see you, too, Clarence.” She raised an eyebrow at him and gave him a once-over. “I made plans with Ruby. She told me to meet her here.”

Castiel loved Meg. Still, he couldn’t understand for the life of him why she was so close to Ruby after all the trouble the girl had caused.

She nodded her head towards him. “What are you doing here?”

“I missed the bus because I had to drop AP Statistics. It was killing me. I picked up another course to replace it though.”

“Yeah? And what’s that?” She raised an eyebrow at him.

“Introduction to Automotive Care with Mr. Singer.”

She laughed harder than Castiel felt was necessary

“It’s not **that** funny.”

“Are you kidding me, Castiel? You and cars? That’s fucking hilarious! Do you know anything about them?” she cackled, wiping tears from her eyes.

 _It’s not that funny._ “A little, but I’m going to need a car soon. Might as well learn a thing or two about them.” He shrugged.

“Well, I look forward to hearing about what you’ve learned.” The corners of her mouth were twitching from her trying to restrain her hysterics.

He rolled his eyes at her, and she started laughing once more. He packed up his things and stood up.

“Aw, come on, Castiel. I’m joking. Don’t leave.” She grabbed his arm.

He looked up at the clock on the wall, 3:12. “The busses are going to be here soon anyway. I’m gonna go.” He whistled to get Charlie’s attention and waved goodbye to her. She mimed texting. He nodded and gave her a thumbs up. “Later, Meg.”

“See ya, Clarence.” She was still softly chuckling.

 _Sometimes she’s such a bitch._ Castiel left the cafeteria looking down at his phone while trying to get his headphones out of his front pocket. He didn’t notice the giant who was walking in front of him, also looking at their phone. They slammed into each other.

“Ouch! Fuck!” the giant exclaimed.

“I am **so** sorry! I wasn’t paying attention! I was trying to multitask and didn’t bother to look up. Are you okay?” Castiel questioned with concern when he recognized who it was. It was the kid Dean called Sammy earlier.

“Nah, it’s okay, man. I wasn’t watching where I was going either. I’m supposed to be meeting my brother, but he’s not answering any of my texts. So, we both should have been paying better attention,” he said while rubbing his chest where Castiel bumped into him.

“Next time I’ll try to pay better attention,” Castiel apologized.

He shrugged. “It’s okay. It’s not like you meant to slam into me,” he said with complete sincerity. “I’m Sam, by the way.”

“Castiel,” he answered, motioning towards himself.

“No offense, that’s a weird name. What does it mean?” Sam replied.

Castiel laughed. “My parents had a thing about angels when they were younger. Castiel is the Angel of Thursday. My older brother got off easy. His name is Gabriel.”

Sam laughed along with Castiel. “Yeah, he did.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s what I get for being born on a Thursday,” Castiel chuckled.

Sam laughed a bit harder “Yeah, I guess so. Well, it’s nice to meet you. I’ll see you around.”

“Bye, Sam.” Castiel waved as he made his way to the entrance where the buses were lined up.

“Later, Castiel.” Sam waved back at him.

 

>>>>>>

 

After he finished talking to Mick and Rufus, Dean checked his cell phone and saw two missed calls and five text messages, all of them from Sam.

**Sam: Are you done yet?**

**Sam: Where are you?**

**Sam: It’s 3… are you done yet?**

**Sam: Just went past the band room. You’re not in there. Where are you?**

**Sam: Where the fuck are you? It’s 3:20!!!**

Dean texted him back.

**Dean: Meet me at the Impala. Got caught up with something.**

He went to the auditorium and grabbed his guitar then made his way to his Baby. He opened the trunk and threw in all his stuff.

Before long, Sam showed up behind him, obviously irritated. “Where the fuck were you, man?!” He looked down at Dean’s bandaged hand. “What the fuck happened to your hand?!”

“Badger. Now, get in the car.”

Sam threw his bag into the trunk, then got in the passenger seat. They sat in silence the entire way to the library. He could see Sam looking at him in his peripherals, but he refused to look back.

When they pulled into the parking lot, Dean turned to Sam with a glare. “Hurry the fuck up. No dawdling.”

“Geez, what the fuck crawled up your ass?!”

All Dean had to do was give him an epic bitch face.

Sam’s face fell. His shoulders slumped. “Okay. I’ll hurry up.”

Dean felt like a giant sack of shit. It wasn’t Sam’s fault. Dean knew he shouldn’t take his problems out on Sam, but unfortunately, as per usual, Dean lashed out at the person who just so happened to be there at the time. _It’s easier to lash out at the ones who love you, I guess._ He stared off into the abyss, gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white, seething with rage and frustration, despising himself for his past indiscretions.

When Sam opened up the passenger door, he nearly jumped out of his skin. If Sam noticed, he didn’t say anything. He plopped into his seat with a wide grin. “Okay, we can go now.” He turned to Dean “Thanks, Dean. I know you didn’t want to give me a ride. I know I annoy you, but I appreciate you taking me here.” His voice and expression were so sincere that Dean’s spirits fell even further than he had thought was possible.

“Look, Sammy. I’m sorry. It’s been a long day. I didn’t mean to take it out on you, man.” He bowed his head and shook it before he turned back to Sam. “I’m sorry.”

Sam nodded in understanding. “I know. Don’t worry about it. Now, let’s go home.” His face brightened. “Chinese food sounds awesome right about now.”

Dean could take a hint. “Dim Sum?”

“Yes, please!” Sam nodded emphatically.

“Let’s go.”

Sam and Dean finished their Chinese food and spent some time watching crap TV until Bobby came home. He talked to Bobby about some of the work that had to be done at the shop. He would work a few hours there in the morning the next day before he had to go to class. He wished them both a good night, then went to take a shower.

After he brushed his teeth, he unwrapped his hand and inspected the cuts that still had not scabbed over. He made a fist and shook his head. _Good thinking, dumbass._ He made sure his shower didn’t last long. He still had a lot of studying to do for the adolescent psychology exam he had the next day. He toweled off quickly and decided to leave his hand unwrapped to let it breathe. He put on some pajama pants and an old white Led Zeppelin shirt with holes in the armpits and padded off to his room.

After he grabbed his notes and index cards from his backpack, he bounced onto the middle of his mattress where he sat Indian style and began to review his notes for the exam. After a while, the words started to blur together, and he felt his attention drift elsewhere. Looking at his hand once more, he cringed at the memory of why the cuts were there, to begin with. His gaze traveled up his forearm to the scars he knew would probably never go away. Although they’re not as prominent as some of his other scars, these are the ones that will always haunt him.

His thoughts landed on the conversation he had earlier with Rufus about Cas. _He definitely deserves better than me._ He threw his notes to the side, deciding now was as good time as any to go to bed. Unfortunately, his brain had other plans in mind. He spent the rest of the night in restless slumber.

 

>>>>>>

 

“Hey, bro,” Gabriel said with his face in an anatomy and physiology textbook as soon as Castiel put his book bag on the floor next to the kitchen table. Gabriel looked up at him and made a face like the one he gets when sucking on a Warhead. “Whoa, you look like shit! Rough day?”

“Wow, love you, too, Gabe!” Castiel exclaimed as he sat down next to him.

“I’m only saying you look like you got hit by a bus.” He tried to make it better; he was only making it worse.

“Gabriel?”

“Yeah?”

“Shut up.”

Gabriel punched him on his arm. “Little shit. Seriously, what’s wrong?”

Castiel rubbed his arm. He was about to say something when he could hear Hannah and his mom heading towards the kitchen. “I’ll tell you later.”

“Whatever.”

“Hey, Hannah. Hi, mom.”

After dinner was cleaned up, Gabriel and Castiel wished their parents and little sister a goodnight, then made their way down to their rooms. Castiel followed Gabriel into his room. They both sat on the couch in front of Gabriel’s bed which faced towards his huge flat screen. Gabriel turned on the TV and put on _Dr. Sexy MD_.

He offered Castiel a dumdum, which he politely refused, then sat down with one in his mouth. “So, you said you’d tell me later. It’s later. What’s going on?”

“Senior year is not going according to plan, at all.” Castiel put his head in his hands.

“ _Life is what happens when you’re making other plans_ ,” Gabriel quoted John Lennon.

“I know. Still, I don’t know what to do.” He sat up turning towards his brother. “Can you give me some advice?”

“Yeah, but I kinda have to know what the advice is for before I can give it,” he remarked while leaning over for another dumdum, setting the stick of the last one next to the bowl filled with a plethora of lollipops.

Castiel sighed. “Smart ass.” He paused to take a deep breath, then told Gabriel how the last two days had gone.

“I agree with, Ms. Moseley. I remember Dean. He’s a player. Don’t waste your time. I know he’s pretty and all, but he broke a lot of hearts in my day.”

Castiel's eyes widened in surprise. “You know who Dean Winchester is?”

“Yeah, I did go to the same high school as you. Dean was in the class that graduated after me. I swear, he was with everyone: Lisa, Cassie, Heather and more. But to be honest, bro, I don’t remember ever seeing him date another guy. Not saying he didn’t have any takers if he wanted to. The musicians always have their pick of anything and anyone they want,” Gabriel informed.

“Huh. I guess you’re right.”

“I know I’m right. Forget him. Dean-o is far from a saint, and I don’t want you getting hurt by his male model good looks and manipulative charm,” Gabriel said with a protective tone. “Now, let’s watch some Dr. Sexy before Kali calls.”

Castiel watched about three episodes with Gabriel by the time Kali, Gabriel’s girlfriend, called. She was in California for an interview, so by the time she called it was ten pm. He waved at his brother as he exited his room, then shut the door behind him

After brushing his teeth and taking out his contacts, Castiel went back to his room. He changed into his pajamas, then laid back on his pillow with his hands behind his head. He thought about his conversation with Gabriel. It had definitely helped. He resolved to no longer let Dean Winchester get to him. He was just another pretty face after all. He pulled the covers over himself and drifted off into a peaceful slumber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are appreciated! Please let me know what you think :)


	6. Chapter Six

“ _The jig is up the news is out they finally found me…”_

Castiel woke up well rested and ready to face the day. _Carpe Diem._

He definitely was in a better frame of mind today. _Dean who?_

When he got to school, he was excited to see what would come next. He was nervous about the new class he was going to be taking, but he was still hopeful.

He stood with Jo and Ash talking until Charlie got there. She tapped him on the shoulder and hugged him. She leaned back, grasping both shoulders. “What happened to texting me last night?”

He beamed at her. “Good morning to you, too, Charlie. Sorry, I spent some time with Gabriel. We talked for a bit, then watched some Dr. Sexy MD.”

He could tell Charlie saw he was in a better mood than he had been the past couple of days, so she let it go. “Which episodes did you watch?”

“I don’t know," Castiel replied with a shrug. "To be honest, the entire show just seems like the same episode being repeated in one form or another. Just a lot of sex and drama.”

Charlie put her hands on her hips. “Well, you should tell him to start watching reruns of things that have contributed to the world of entertainment like Buffy, Star Trek, and Firefly.” 

“Well, once you win the argument with him about Firefly, I’m sure I can try to convince him that he should watch Buffy and Star Trek,” he mentioned.

“OH, MY GOD!!! WHEDON WAS JIPPED I’M TELLING YOU!!! JIPPED!!!” she exclaimed with a little too much vigor, drawing onlookers from the different groups walking by the auditorium and school store.

Castiel chuckled. “Yes, we know.”

“Charlie, it’s just a TV show. Yeah, it was awesome, but you gotta let it go. You were like three when it came out,” Jo interjected.

“Oh, and your fascination with soap operas is normal?” Charlie growled.

Jo narrowed her eyes at Charlie, then pointed at her. “Hey! Days of our Lives is awesome!”

“Ladies, ladies! What is going on?” Andy strolled over.

_Someone hit the bong a little early today._

“Stay out of this, Andy!” Charlie barked.

“No hostility is necessary, ladies.” He put his arm around Jo’s shoulder. “Am I right?”

“Andy, I suggest you remove your arm before you lose it,” Jo hissed.

Andy pulled his arm back and put his hands up. “Geez, ladies, take a Midol or something.”

Jo punched him in the arm.

“Ow! What the fuck, Jo?” Andy asked as he grabbed his arm.

“Serves you right, dick,” Charlie chuckled. The argument was completely forgotten. She turned to Castiel. “So, you never told me what happened yesterday about how things went with Ms. Mills.”

“Oh… yeah… Um, I picked up a class.” He looked down at his shoes.

“Uh-huh. Kinda figured you would. What class?”

 _God, please don’t laugh at me like Meg did._ He screwed up his face at her. “Introduction to automotive care with Mr. Singer.”

She mimicked his expression. “Ew. Why?”

“I know. I just... I suck at mornings. I would spend study hall sleeping. Plus, you know, car maintenance is important and all that junk.” He knew he didn’t sound convincing.

“Uh-huh.” She shrugged. “Well, whatever floats your boat.” The bell rang, and Charlie glanced at Castiel. “Sixth period? Lunchroom?”

Castiel gave her the _Really?_ Bitchface.

“Okay. See you, then.” She raised her hand in the Vulcan salute to the group. “Later, bitches.”

Castiel chuckled and straightened up his bag on his shoulder. “Bye, guys. See ya in marching band,” Castiel said with a wave as he started to walk down the art corridor. He took the hallway past the cafeteria, then turned left down the technology hallway.

The school had been expanded upon several times due to the massive influx of students over the years. They rebuilt the entire front of the school last year to prepare for this year when the ninth grade and the tenth grade moved up to the high school. The technology hallway was one of the oldest parts of the building. Castiel never had any reason in the past to go back there, and now that he did, it was kind of creepy.

As soon as Castiel entered the second door on the right, his jaw dropped. It was massive. He took a moment to soak in his surroundings and realized he was utterly lost. He had no idea what anything was. There were a bunch of tools around five vehicles he assumed they would be working on. Of course, he could not name one of them if he tried. Castiel let his eyes survey his surrounding a bit further in search of the teacher. When he saw an older gentleman with a worn out baseball cap and a flannel shirt over by a computer, he assumed that was more than likely Mr. Singer. Castiel straightened the straps of his backpack on his shoulder, then started walking towards the man with the baseball cap when he heard someone say, “Castiel?” behind him in a semi-familiar voice. He looked behind him and saw Sam walking towards him with a huge grin.

“It is you! What are you doing here? I didn’t know you were in this class!” Sam exclaimed like an excited puppy.

“Yeah, I wasn’t. I was originally taking AP Statistics, but I couldn’t stand the teacher. I saw Ms. Mills yesterday, and this was the only class left. I know nothing about cars, but I figured what the hell, right?”

“Well, Bobby is awesome! You’re gonna love him! Here, I’ll introduce you,” Sam added, motioning towards Mr. Singer.

When they reached Bobby, Sam said, “Hey, Bobby? We got a new kid.”

Castiel held out his hand “Hello, Mr. Singer. I’m Castiel. I believe Ms. Mills sent you an email yesterday telling you I would be joining your class?”

Bobby looked down at Castiel’s extended hand. “Put your hand down, ya idjit and follow me. You, too, Sam.” Bobby walked over to the car Sam had walked away from when he went to say hi to Castiel. “Now, this is gonna be your car. You’re going to learn how to take care of it and fix it. Grades are relative. You show up and do what you’re supposed to do; you’ll do well. The final exam is I should be able to turn this car on, and it should be good enough to pass a New York State inspection. You got it?”

Castiel nodded his head in understanding.

“Good. Sam, I expect you to help this kid out. He looks lost. Castiel, I taught this boy myself. Listen to him, and you’ll do fine.” Bobby patted Castiel on the back before walking back to the computer.

“Thank you, Mr. Singer.” He turned back to Sam, naturally in distress.

Sam observed with a wide grin. “Don’t worry. Seriously. Between my brother, my dad, and Bobby, I know how to fix a car.”

Castiel spent most of the class watching Sam with a significant amount of confusion. He was continually asking Sam, “What’s this?” Sam was incredibly patient and explained everything to him. Castiel was genuinely grateful Sam was the person he was partnered with.

“So, what grade are you in?” Sam asked while he was wiping a part down for the engine.

“I’m a senior.”

“Cool! I’m a sophomore. This school is massive! I’ve been in it before considering my brother went here, but they’ve built it up quite a bit since I was last here.”

“Yeah. They just finished the library three weeks ago. It’s gorgeous. Have you seen it yet?”  

Sam looked at him, eyes wide. “No! I haven’t! I usually just go to the library off of Sycamore. Sometimes I feel like I live there.”

Castiel was baffled. He spent his entire summer working at that library, and he could not recall seeing Sam once. “Really? I work there. Well, not right now because they haven’t changed the hours yet to match the start of the school year, but I’m there on the weekends. I’ve never seen you there.”

Sam chuckled. “Yeah, I have a spot where I go to hide. I grab a book and just sit there for hours.”

Castiel smiled. “Where is this spot? It must be a killer spot if you can hide there.”

Sam looked back at the engine. “Well, if I tell you where it is, it won’t be a secret anymore,” he paused, then turned back to Castiel with a smile, “Will it?”

Castiel shook his head. “Who am I going to tell? When I’m there, I’m working. I don’t read. I wish I could, but I don’t have time.”

Sam shrugged. “Ok. You know the bottom floor of the Non-fiction area?”

Castiel nodded.

“I usually sit on a stool next to the stairs on the right," he continued. "People can’t see me because one, it’s dark, and two because the railing is a wall of solid concrete. So I can understand why you’ve never seen me there.”

Castiel knew the exact spot he was referencing. He used to sit there when he didn’t work at the library. “I used to sit there.”

Sam smiled brightly.

“Don’t worry. It’ll be our secret,” Castiel promised with a wink.

“Good. ‘Cause the last thing I need is for my brother to be able to find me. He can be a serious jerk, but he basically raised me, so I try to let it go.”

Castiel didn’t want Sam to know that he knew who his brother was, but he was curious so... “Really? Wow! Why?”

“Well, we moved around a lot with my dad when we were younger. After my mom died, my dad kind of snapped. He would disappear for days, sometimes weeks, and I was always left with Dean. He took care of me. Whether it was making my dinner, walking me to school, or helping me with my homework; he’s always been there. To be honest, I lost count of how many times I saw Dean go without so I wouldn’t go hungry. Eventually, we went to live with Bobby,” he said, pointing to Mr. Singer. “We lived in Sioux Falls, South Dakota until Bobby got a teaching job here. The pay was a lot better than what he was making there. Not to mention, he had two more mouths to feed, so we moved here when I was eleven.”

“What happened to your dad?” Castiel asked. Sam’s face fell. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to overstep or anything.”

“No. It’s ok. He... well… he died. Not long after we went to live with Bobby,” he confided.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok. He wasn’t really there, to begin with, so…” He cleared his throat.

 _Change the subject, Castiel._ “I guess it’s a good thing you had your brother, then,” he sympathized.

“Yeah.” His expression instantly changed to one of admiration. He clearly loved and looked up to Dean.

_Maybe there is something more to him..._

“He’s a cocky son of a bitch and can be a serious jerk, but he’s always been there for me, so as I said before, I try to let it go,” Sam said as he wiped motor oil from his hands. “So, you want me to teach you how to change a battery?” he smiled down at Castiel.

“I thought you would never ask.” He marveled sarcastically.

Sam chuckled and started to explain the steps.

 

>>>>>>

 

_“I'm just a man who needed someone, and somewhere to hide. To keep me alive, just keep me alive.”_

Dean swiped left on the screen of his phone. Five a.m. was way too fucking early. _Bobby is lucky I care about him so fucking much. I don’t do this time of day for just anyone._

He rolled out of bed, then staggered to the bathroom rubbing his eyes. He opened the door, did his morning business, then went back to his room to get dressed. He threw on his black steel-toed boots, jeans, and an old Pink Floyd shirt. He stopped in the kitchen to brew a pot of coffee while he stared out the window blankly while its aroma slowly filled the air. He sipped his coffee in silence, letting the caffeine work through his system.

He cleaned his mug when he was finished, grabbed his keys, then left the house, locking the door behind him. When he arrived at the shop around six a.m., Cesar was already there, waiting for him. “Morning, Dean. How're things at the high school?”

“The usual.” He unlocked the shop door, then made his way to Bobby’s office while Cesar went to the lockers in the back. He threw his keys on the desk and sat down turning on the computer to see what the day's schedule looked like. Cesar walked in not long after Dean finally was able to log in and bring up the calendar.

“You want me to make some coffee?” Cesar asked.

Dean sighed in relief. “Oh, God, yes. Thanks, man.”

“Ah, don’t mention it. You look like you could use a pot or so. Did you not sleep?” Cesar inquired as he busied himself with the coffee machine.

“Lots of stuff going on. Takes a bit of time for me to chill out at night, ya know?” Dean wasn’t going to tell Cesar he spent most of the night thinking about his ex and her cousin. Or the fact that one of the students at the high school kept making a guest appearance in his dreams making it impossible to get any rest.

“You and Jesse have the same problem. I told him the best way to get things off your mind is to write them down before you go to sleep,” Cesar mentioned as he poured the coffee grounds into the filter before shutting it and turning the machine on.

Dean furrowed his eyebrows at Cesar. “What, like a journal?” 

“No. Not really. He just keeps a notepad on his side of the bed and writes random shit down on it in the middle of the night if it pops into his head. Used to keep me up until ungodly hours at first, but eventually, it helped. He doesn’t have the problem as much as he used to. His mind never stops going, ya know?” He grabbed the cream out of the fridge and put it next to the machine as he waited for the coffee to finish brewing.

“I know the feeling.” He huffed out a small chuckle. “I’ll think about it. Thanks, man.”

“No problem.”

After he had a cup of coffee, Cesar left the room to let in Harvey and Isaac. Dean had finished up doing a bit of paperwork for Bobby when the phone rang at around 7:15. “Singer’s Repairs and Salvage. This is Dean.”

“ _I need you to bring the camshaft for the ‘92 Ford Taurus to the school._ ”

“Well, good morning to you, too, Bobby,” Dean grumbled into the phone.

“ _Don’t give me that, boy. How many times have you asked me to drop everything to help you with something?_ ” Bobby barked.

Dean rolled his eyes at the phone. "Just making a point that ‘Good Morning’ goes a long way, Bobby.” 

“ _Can you just bring the damn part, ya idjit.”_ The line went dead.

“Wow! Someone’s in a pleasant mood.” He called Cesar into the office. “Hey, man, can you keep the place up and running for a bit? I gotta bring a part to Bobby at the school.”

Cesar smiled brightly at Dean. “Of course. The first customer isn’t due until around 8:30 anyway, so take your time.” 

“Thanks. He seems more ornery than usual this morning,” Dean added as he grabbed his keys.

“Bring him an egg sandwich. Always works.” He patted the door frame and walked away.

 _True story._ He walked out to his Baby and went to Strathmore to pick up a couple of egg sandwiches and coffees for him and Bobby. He grabbed a green tea for Sammy while he was there, too.

He parked close to the school’s shop room and walked through the door that was near his computer. “Bobby, I brought you the part you asked for. Plus an egg sandwich from Strathmore.”

Bobby turned to him with a sigh of relief. “Thank you! You brought me food and coffee, too. Damn near saved my life you have this morning.”

Dean laughed. “It’s just a part and some Strathmore, Bobby. I didn’t prevent the apocalypse or anything.” At that moment, he caught Sam talking to the last person in the world he thought he would see that morning. _Cas._ He felt a weight lift off him that he wasn’t aware he was baring until he looked at him. To say he was thrilled to see him was an understatement.

Bobby raised an eyebrow at him. He looked over at Castiel, then back at Dean. “What’s with the face, boy? Do you know him or something?”

He glanced over at Bobby before he beamed back at the vision that was Cas. “I’ll be right back, Bobby.”

Bobby shrugged and grabbed his sandwich.

“Cas?”

 

>>>>>>

 

Five minutes before the bell, Mr. Singer told everyone to stop what they were doing and wash up. _Oh, thank god!_ Castiel felt disgusting. He knew he smelled like the inside of an engine, but he had to admit he did have fun. Castiel and Sam shared a sink. He was just telling Sam that he thinks he should start bringing a spare change of clothing with him every day when he heard.

“Bobby, I brought you the part you asked for. Plus an egg sandwich from Strathmore.”

He could feel all the color leave his face as he froze, letting the water run over his already rinsed off hands.

Sam scrutinized Castiel with concern. “Hey, you okay?” Castiel looked at Sam like a deer in headlights. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost or something.”

“I’m fine.” He stuttered turning back towards the sink to shut the water off and dry his hands with some paper towel.

“Are you sure? You don’t look good?” Sam questioned with apparent disbelief.

“Yeah. I’ll be okay,” Castiel said as he continued to use the paper towel.

“If you say so.” He shrugged and went to grab his bag.

Castiel prayed to God that Dean didn’t see him. He kept his head low as he went for his bag, then tried to hide amongst the other kids in the class until the bell rang.

“Cas?”

 _Fuck!_ He acted like he didn’t hear him and faced in the opposite direction. _Maybe if I look this way, he’ll think I’m somebody else._

“Cas?” He felt him tap his shoulder.

 _Jesus Christ, fuck my life._ “Hey, Mr. Winchester. I didn’t see you there.” He tried but failed to act cool.

“What are you doing here? I didn’t know you were in this class.” He disclosed with an amused expression.

“I wasn’t, until this morning. I previously had AP Statistics. I dropped it. This is the only other class they offered during the first period. I didn’t want to have a study hall at this time of day.” He couldn’t hold his gaze. He looked down at his shoes trying not to feel Dean’s eyes on him.

“Well, gotta say, I never thought I’d see you in here.” Castiel looked to the right and shrugged still trying to avoid looking at him.

“Hey, Dean! How do you know Castiel?” Sam exclaimed while strutting over with the grin that always seemed to be plastered on his face.

“Cas and I go way back.”

Castiel looked at him with a perplexed expression.

Dean winked at him with a smirk.

Castiel rolled his eyes. Now, he was irritated. “So, Sam, this is your brother?”

Sam nodded.

Castiel turned back towards Dean and hissed, “I see what you mean.”

Dean shot Sam a puzzled look.

Sam shrugged with emphasis by lifting up his hands.

Dean looked back at Castiel as Sam chuckled behind him.

The bell rang. Castiel looked at the clock, then at Sam. “Later, Sam,” he said, then left the room.

“Bye, Castiel!” Sam yelled after him.

Castiel was livid. _Who does this jerk think he is? Gabriel and Ms. Moseley were right about him. What a flirt! Cocky asshole was smirking at me…_ He was pulled out of his internal tirade by a hand touching his left shoulder.

Castiel spun around and was faced with a questioning gaze from bottle green eyes. “See what he means about what?”

His eyes widened in disbelief. “Did you seriously just follow me out of the classroom to ask me that? You couldn’t just ask Sam what I meant?” he challenged, his words dripping with loathing.

“I could have asked him. I’d rather hear it from you,” he urged with a flirtatious smile.

He rolled his eyes and turned away from him to stomp off. “Ugh. Bye, Mr. Winchester!”

He could hear Dean following closely behind him. _Please, just leave me alone! Can’t you see what you’re doing to me?_

Castiel felt Dean’s hand on his shoulder once again. “What’s eating you, Cas? What’s with the sudden attitude?” 

Castiel stopped and turned to scowl at Dean, hoping his face would tell him all he needed to know.

It didn’t. Dean brows were furrowed as he searched his expression trying to pinpoint Castiel’s reasoning. His handsome face was laced with concern as he slowly closed the gap between them, his green eyes focusing on his.

Standing as close as they were was distracting him from his original course of action. He could see flecks of gold amid the emerald green of Dean’s hypnotizing gaze. His face was spattered with tiniest of freckles.

Dean licked his lips.

Castiel internally berated himself for following Dean’s tongue as it moistened his lips. _God, he’s beautiful. Looking like that should be illegal._

Dean was slowly moving his hand down Castiel’s arm, searing him with his touch. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

Castiel wanted to give in. To throw in the towel and fall for Dean’s flirtatious antics. Still, Gabriel was pretty specific about how Dean likes to manipulate people into believing him by using his flirty charm and male model good looks. So, he stuck to his guns. “It’s none of your concern. Now, if you wouldn’t mind, I have to get to class.”

Dean stepped back, his hand falling to his side. His eyes focused on Castiel’s, full of what could only be described as mournful astonishment.

“Goodbye, Mr. Winchester.”

Eyes that usuallywere translucent sparkling emeralds were now murky and forlorn, filled with torment, boring into his until Castiel worked up the courage to turn and walk away.

_So much for not obsessing over him…_

  
  
>>>>>>

 

“What the fuck did you say to Cas?!” Dean attacked Sam as he was exiting the shop room doors.

“Woah! Nothing!” Sam protested.

“Well, it had to be something for him to snap at me like that!” Dean barked.

“I told him you tend to be a bit of a jerk sometimes, but overall you’re a good guy,” Sam answered.

Dean’s eyebrows shot up, and his eyes widen in confusion. _Then, why was he so cold?_ He stopped himself from proceeding with that line of internal questioning before he narrowed his gaze at Sam. “You said I’m a jerk?” he hissed.

Sam crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Dean. “Yeah, I did. I also said you’re a good guy, too. Why the fuck does it matter to you what was said?” 

“It doesn’t,” Dean challenged.

“Really? It doesn’t? That’s why you’re attacking me right now? Because it doesn’t matter?” Sam scoffed.

“Yeah.” He looked around, avoiding Sam’s perceptive gaze. “I gotta go.”

Sam’s face sobered from its original scrutinizing glare. “What’s going on, Dean?” he asked with obvious concern.

“Nothing.” He shook his head as he answered. “I’ll see you later.” He waved a hand at Sam.

“Later.”

He could feel Sam’s watchful eyes as he walked through the shop. He said goodbye to Bobby and marched off to the Impala.

Cas’ distance stung. He couldn’t understand his sudden change. His responses were close to arctic compared to the way he had been the two days prior. When he was finally in the driver’s seat of the Impala, he began to review every moment he shared with him. Nothing but flirtatious banter and stolen glances that set his soul on fire. _Woah, watch it with the poetry, Winchester._ He didn’t realize how hard he was squeezing the steering wheel until he saw blood dripping down the back of his hand. The strength of his grip opened up the cuts that had scabbed over during the night. _Fucking great!_ He grabbed the paper towels and wipes from underneath the seats and opened up the glove compartment where he knew he had a few bandages. After cleaning and patching himself up, he put the keys in the ignition and drove back to the shop.

He spent the rest of the morning lost in thought trying to figure out exactly what went wrong where until he had to head to class to take his exam. _Yeah, definitely going to pass this one._

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel despised himself for most of the day after how things went that morning with Dean in the art corridor. The anguished expression that Castiel was responsible for was haunting him throughout the day. _You were told not to obsess over him, you dumbass,_ he thought while metaphorically kicking himself. _He deserved it. He’s been toying with your emotions since day one. You don’t deserve that; you deserve better!_

When he met Charlie outside of the cafeteria during the sixth period, she already knew what was wrong the instant she laid eyes on him. “What did he do now? Isn’t he supposed to be elsewhere today?”

“Mr. Singer was his legal guardian or something. He was visiting him this morning,” Castiel mumbled as he inspected his shoes.

“So, what happened?” Charlie asked empathetically.

“I’m just sick of him flirting with me,” Castiel whimpered. “After finding out what he’s all about from Ms. Moseley and Gabriel, I want nothing to do with him.” He took a deep breath and sighed. “But the way he looks at me... I don’t know. He makes me feel like it’s real.” He cleared his throat to force back the tears that were rapidly approaching.

“Look, maybe he does, maybe he doesn’t, but you can’t continue on like this or you’re going to make yourself sick.” Charlie tried to comfort him by putting a hand on his shoulder. “One thing I know is you can’t keep worrying about what this guy is going to do next. For once, please try not to let shit get to you. It’s not worth it.”

“I know you’re right but…”

“Castiel?”

Castiel turned to his right and saw Sam walking over to him. He quickly changed his expression and prayed it was convincing. “Hey, Sam! This is my friend Charlie. Charlie, this is Sam.”

“Hey, Charlie! Nice to meet you!” He smiled brightly at her,  his hands holding the straps of the bag on his back.

“Hi, Sam. Likewise.” She smiled sweetly back.

“Sam is in my automotive class. He’s a master mechanic, I swear,” Castiel laughed.

“I know my way around a car. I wouldn’t say I’m a master. Bobby and Dean are the true masters,” he admitted.

“Dean? As in Mr. Winchester? That Dean?” Charlie asked with a dumbfounded expression.

“Yeah, Dean’s my older brother. Which reminds me. Castiel, what happened this morning? My brother showed up, and you couldn’t get away fast enough. What gives?”

“Yeah, Shurley, what gives?” Charlie instigated.

“Well… I… Ugh… it’s a long story,” Castiel muttered as he closed his eyes and shook his head in exasperation before he looked at the ground.

“Your brother is hot and has been torturing Castiel the past few days.”

If looks could kill, Charlie’s head would be rolling on the floor of the hallway.

Not in the least intimidated, Charlie met Castiel’s glare with a sweet smile. “What? You said it was a long story. I simplified it.”

“Yeah, that sounds like Dean.” Sam nodded his head in agreement. “Sorry, man. He’s like a dog with a bone. Once he picks up the scent of someone wanting him, even if he doesn’t want them back, he uses his charm to make them believe otherwise. I have no excuse for him. I’m sorry.”

Sam’s admission to all the claims that had been made against Dean was all the confirmation Castiel needed. _That settles that. He is definitely using me to feed his ego._ “Don’t worry about it. My brother and Ms. Moseley kinda already filled me in on his M.O.,” Castiel mumbled.

“Yeah, he’s a flirt, always has been. Sorry, he got his claws into you before I could warn you,” Sam apologized. “I gotta be honest with you; he kinda reamed me out about you earlier. He demanded to know what I said about him to you. He said you gave him a serious attitude in the hallway and didn’t understand what he did to deserve it. He said it was something I said to you.”

“It’s nothing you did, Sam. I was just agreeing with you when you said he’s kind of a jerk and a cocky one at that,” Castiel stated.

“Well, he was pissed. I’ve never seen him so upset over someone giving him the cold shoulder. I feel like I should give you a round of applause or a pat on the back for a job well done,” Sam raved with disbelief.

“Hooray for me I guess,” Castiel grumbled.

The cafeteria doors opened, and people started to file inside. “Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” He turned to walk away from the other two.

“Hey, Sam?” Charlie asked. “Why don’t you come eat lunch with us?”

Sam lit up with a wide grin. “Really?”

Charlie snorted. “Of course. You’re not gonna try and eat us or anything, are you?” 

Sam’s face screwed up in disgust. “Ew. No. Why would I do that?”

“Then join us.” She motioned for him to follow. He was thrilled by the offer and accepted without a second thought. 

Charlie, Castiel, and Sam took their seat at one of the round tables by the vending machines, then started to take out their lunch. Sam and Charlie got along splendidly. They were geeking out about some sort of computer program Castiel had never heard of and Games of Thrones which Castiel had yet to read or watch. A few times, he caught them checking out the same chicks and smiled.

Meg joined them after buying her lunch. “Hiya, Clarence. Who’s the kid?” she asked, pointing a fry at Sam before she stuffed it into her mouth.

“Sam Winchester, meet Meg Masters,” Castiel said, pointing from one to the other.

“Dean Winchester’s brother, huh? Are all the men in your family pretty or just you two?” she inquired before eating a few more fries.

“Ignore her, Sam. She doesn’t have a filter,” Charlie stated as an explanation for Meg.

Sam didn’t know what to say, so he kept his mouth shut.

“Aw, are you shy, Winchester? That’s kinda sweet,” Meg taunted.

“No. I just prefer to choose my words wisely. More so than some who have recently made my acquaintance,” he retorted before taking another bite of his salad.

Charlie and Castiel laughed at Sam’s backhanded insult at Meg. _I like this kid._

“Smart ass,” Meg grunted throwing Sam a dirty look.

“I’d rather be a smartass than a dumbass,” he added as he beamed at Meg.

Meg rolled her eyes and went back to eating her chicken nuggets and fries.

Ruby came over and sat next to Meg whispering something to her. Meg turned to her with a maniacal grin as Ruby stole a couple of fries from Meg’s plate.

The whole time Sam stared at Ruby with adept attention. _Oh no._ Castiel would not let Sam get involved with her. If Dean is considered a flirt, then she might as well be a demon. With the amount of trouble that girl had caused on more than one occasion, he would not let her torment his new friend.

Charlie caught both Castiel and Sam’s expressions. She locked eyes with Castiel, sharing a silent conversation about how to proceed. Unfortunately, they were one second too late in warning Sam. Ruby took one look at Sam and saw her new victim, someone she could sink her teeth into and moved to sit next to him. _Fuck! This isn’t good._

When they left the cafeteria, Castiel turned to Sam as they walked down the music corridor towards their seventh-period classes. “Sam? You know how you said you wished you could have warned me about Dean before he got his claws into me?”

“Yeah. Why?” he asked with his eyebrows furrowed.

“Don’t get too close to Ruby. I promise you; it will bring you nothing but heartache and trouble. Trust me on this. You may not know me well enough to do so, but I really don’t want you to get hurt. There are other people, **better** people, out there than her,” he pointed out while keeping his hand on Sam’s shoulder, which was moderately uncomfortable considering his height.

Sam looked down at Castiel. “Okay,” he said with a noncommittal shrug.

He knew that look. Sam wasn’t going to listen to him. _Well, can’t say I didn’t try to warn him._ “See you later, then.”

As they parted ways at the stairs, Castiel looked back at Sam and felt sorry for him. He knew what he was about to go through with Ruby. He’d seen many victims fall to her charm in the past. She was a master manipulator. She never had to tell someone what to do. She would lay the choice out before them, and they would make the one she wanted them to, every time.

From the way everyone spoke of Dean, I guess the same could be said about him.

 

>>>>>>

Dean left his exam with a piercing migraine. "Benny, man, that was torture. Plain and simple.” 

“I don’t know, brotha. I think it was pretty easy.” He shrugged. “Then again, I studied.”

“I studied!” Dean exclaimed. Benny just turned to him with an eyebrow raised. “I did!”

“How much?”

“A little…” 

Benny laughed as they continued their stroll through the quad. 

“Look, working at the high school is not as easy as I thought it was going to be.”

“What? Too many people falling all over themselves to get a chance to be near you?” he jested.

“Not that….”

“Then, what?” Benny pushed.

“Well, for one, Al goes to school there.”

Benny stopped dead in his tracks. “Al? As in Alastair, Lilith’s cousin?” Benny asked, already knowing the answer.

Dean looked at the ground. “Yes,” he confirmed.

“Fuck. What happened?” Benny questioned.

“I told him to fuck off.” He looked down at his hand and made a fist. _Then, maimed yourself by punching the innocent wall in the bathroom._

“Good.” He started to move towards the parking lot again. “What else?”

Dean turned to Benny confused “What else what?”

“You said, ‘well, for one,’ There has to be a two if you said that. What else?” he asked

“Just the usual stuff. You know, being in my old school again, it’s stressful.” _Castiel…_

“Uh-huh… You’re a terrible liar.” Benny walked up to his truck and unlocked it. “We getting together tomorrow for practice?”

“Of course. I’ll group message everyone later with a time,” Dean smiled.

“Good.” Before Benny hopped into the driver seat, he gave Dean a small smile. “I’m happy you told Al to fuck off. You’re better off without the two of them.”

“Thanks, man.”

Benny tipped his Greek fisherman’s hat at Dean.

Dean got into his Baby and turned the key in the ignition. He put in his "Master of Puppets" cassette and sat there listening for a while before he figured it would be a good idea to head to the high school to pick up Sam. _It’s better to be early than late._

He drove down the LIE until he got to the exit for Vets Highway. He stopped at Speedway to fill up his tank. When he went to grab his change from the cashier, he bought a Dr. Pepper for himself and a bottle of water for Sam. He got back in the car and remembered Thursday was one of the days the Marching Band practiced out on the football field with the Kickline/Color Guard team. _It wouldn’t be wrong to watch them, right? Plus, Ellen and Jo will be there._ Nevermind the real reason why. It had absolutely nothing to do with Castiel. _Hey, it’s also educational. For work and stuff._ He shook his head. _Who the fuck are you kidding?_

He took a right down Kenmore Drive, then turned right into the high school parking lot where the busses were already lining up. He parked next to the tennis courts and almost tripped out of the front seat as he hurriedly made his way to the football field. He took out his phone and quickly texted Sam.

**Dean: Meet me at the football field after school.**

When he got to the field, he searched the sea of students until he finally saw what he was searching for and smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, everyone, for reading! Please leave comments! I want to hear from you :)


	7. Chapter Seven

Castiel was ecstatic when he got to the football field and realized he wasn’t going to embarrass himself at Dean’s expense again. _Dean isn’t here._

Anna’s face split into a massive grin as Castiel made his way over to where she stood on the bleachers. “I’m so fucking happy to see you! Yesterday sucked without you!” she raved.

Castiel gave her a small smile. “Well, I’m sure it wasn’t that bad, but regardless, I’m happy to see you, too.”

He unpacked his oboe and walked with her towards the field. “Are you happy because you know he’s not going to be here today?”

He turned to her and raised his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

“Mr. Winchester. He’s not here today,” she stated.

“I know. What does that have to do with anything?” Castiel urged.

“I don’t know. You seem a little more excited than usual today.” She shrugged.

Castiel shook his head. “Anna, you’re reading too much into my behavior. Dean’s absence has nothing to do with why I’m excited to be here.” 

“Dean? You’re on a first name basis with Mr. Winchester?” she asked, surprised.

“Um… I’m actually... kinda friends with his younger brother,” he admitted.

“You’re what?!” Anna exclaimed.

“It’s a long story.” 

Mr. Davies and Mr. Turner were already directing everyone to take their positions.

Castiel moved around the field with ease knowing Dean’s eyes were not on him. Things felt relatively normal again as he walked in the choreographed steps to “Twist and Shout.” He couldn’t help but smile with a light chuckle as he watched Mr. Davies and Mr. Turner arguing over something, as per usual.  

When he turned to his right to make a face at Anna, his eyes fell on the last face he wanted to see. _And the only one._ Dean was standing by the gate, smiling at him. Or at least it looked like it was at him. More than likely it was just at the band in general.

Anna looked at him, puzzled. He motioned his head ever so slightly towards Dean. She turned to see what he was motioning towards, and her jaw dropped. She turned back towards Castiel, eyes wide, and mouthed, “ ** _What the actual fuck?!_** ”

He shook his head and shrugged.

The final bell rang signaling that he could expect to see Charlie soon. _God, I seriously need her right now!_ They played a little while longer until the team showed up and Mr. Davies told everyone to take ten. He almost sprinted over to Charlie who was more than a little surprised to see him barreling towards her. “Whoa, Shurley! Where’s the fire?”

He knew he looked like a squirrel on speed, but he was about to lose his mind. _He wasn’t supposed to be here at all today! Now I’m seeing him at the beginning and the end of my day?!?! How is this fucking fair?!?! What did I do to deserve this kind of torment?!?!_ “He’s here again?!”

“Dean?” Charlie asked as she unraveled a flag.

“No. The elephant man.” He punched her arm. “Yes, Dean.”

She followed Castiel’s gaze to Dean who was talking to Jo and Ms. Harvelle. Her eyebrows furrowed. “Why is he here? Didn’t you say he’s only supposed to be here on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays?”

“I don’t know. To torture me? To drive me insane? Who knows?” Castiel was pacing back and forth in front of Charlie. He could feel the beginnings of a panic attack, maybe even a myocardial infarction, until Charlie noticed.

“Whoa, Castiel! Breathe. Breathe!” She grabbed both of his shoulders and turned him towards her to look him in the eyes. “Stop getting so worked up over him! He knows he can rile you up like this. Remember what Sam said earlier?”

He took a few steadying breaths “Yes.”

“So, don’t let him get to you,” Charlie cooed as she rubbed his back. “You got this. Ok?”

Jo came skipping over towards them. “Charlie?” Whatever she was planning on asking was cast aside as soon as she caught sight of Castiel. “Whoa! What’s wrong with you?”

Charlie answered for him. “Dean.”

Jo nodded with a knowing expression “Oh… Got to you, too, huh? I had the biggest crush on him when my mom and Bobby first started dating.”

“You’re mom and Mr. Singer?” Castiel asked, trying to hide his shock.

“He’s a great guy! I wouldn’t let my mom date a loser.” She put her hands on her hips and scowled. “He doesn’t just work here, you know. He owns his auto body repair and salvage shop. Dean helps him run it,” she beamed.

“Wow,” Charlie and Castiel marveled in unison.

“Yeah.” She smiled, then turned to look directly at Castiel. “Look, don’t let him get to you, Castiel. He’s not all that. He puts on the whole ‘I’m so awesome and perfect’ facade all the time. He’s just like any other guy. Thinks with his dick,” she said with a shrug. “No offense.”

“None taken.”

“COME ON. LET’S GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD, LADIES!!!” Mr. Turner hollered.

“OH, QUIT YOUR YELLING! WE’RE MOVING, RUFUS!” Ms. Harvelle screamed back.

Castiel gave Charlie a big hug. “We’ll talk later,” she whispered to him, then squeezed him tightly one last time before she sent him on his way.

Castiel turned towards Dean who now had Sam beside him. Sam waved at him. He brought his hand up and gave him a small wave back. He couldn’t help but notice that Dean smiled all the more brightly when he saw that. He felt his face flush as he smiled awkwardly at the ground and walked back to his spot. _Kill me now._

 

>>>>>>

 

“Dean, what are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be off today?” Ellen asked.

“Well, I’m supposed to be helping you guys prepare for Hofstra, right? Seems only right that I try to be here as much as possible. Even though I don’t have to be,” Dean rambled.

“Uh-huh…” Ellen was far from convinced. “If you say so.”

Jo came up to him, and shoulder checked him. “Ow!” He wasn’t kidding it did hurt. “What the hell?”

Jo narrowed her eyes at him, hands on her hips. “What are you doing here, weirdo? Shouldn’t you be taking Sam home or something?” 

“Why is everyone all of a sudden so interested in why I’m here?” Dean asked with apparent irritation.

“Just wondering, hun. It’s good to see you so motivated,” Ellen emphasized with a pat on the back.

He took a quick peek at Cas. He was pacing in front of Charlie, hyperventilating. _Yeah, motivated… not for the right reasons._ He turned back to Ellen who was waiting for a reaction to her previous comment. “Well, trying to turn over a new leaf. Ya know?” _Bullshit._

“Yeah… well, have fun with that.” Jo stuck her tongue out at him and skipped over to Charlie and Cas.

“You know, I just adore her. She’s so sweet, so gentle,” Dean mused.

Ellen smacked him upside the head. “Don’t give me that, you smartass.”

He brought his hand up to rub it and glared at her.

“Well, better to be a smartass than a dumbass, right, Dean?” Sam grinned as he joined them at the fence.

“Perfect timing, Sammy. I was just about to claim abuse.” 

Ellen raised an eyebrow at Dean who merely smiled back.

“COME ON. LET’S GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD, LADIES!!!” Rufus hollered.

“OH, QUIT YOUR YELLING! WE’RE MOVING, RUFUS!” Ellen screamed back. “Well, good seeing you two." She kissed both of them on the cheek and walked towards the field.

“Hey! It’s Castiel!” Sam gave Cas a big wave to get his attention. Since Cas was already looking in their direction, it wasn't hard to grab his attention. He gave Sam a small wave back as he walked back to his spot on the field.

Dean’s face lit up. _He may not like me, but at least he gets along with Sam._ He wasn’t sure, but he could swear he saw Cas’ cheeks turned a rosy pink as he made a goofy smile towards his feet. _Maybe I was wrong._

“No. I know that face.”

Dean turned his head so quick he almost gave himself whiplash. “What face?”

“Leave him alone, man. You’ve already done enough. Trust me on that,” he scowled at Dean.

“What are you talking about?” he asked, acting oblivious.

“Look. You may be able to act all sly with Ellen, Jo, and Bobby, but I know your looks. I’ve been looking up to you my entire life. Don’t torture Castiel. You’ve already confused him enough,” Sam preached.

“I haven’t done anything to him, Sam. I’ve talked to him a few times. That’s all,” Dean proclaimed.

“Right… So, when I ate lunch with him earlier today, and he said you have been pulling your usual flirtatious bullshit, stringing him along as you have with countless others, he was lying?” Sam theorized.

“He said that?” Dean breathed.

“No. More Charlie said that and him not answering confirmed it,” Sam explained. 

Dean went to defend himself. 

“Nope. Don’t want to hear it. Can we…” Sam was distracted by the sudden appearance of the brunette that Ellen called Ruby the other day. “Nevermind. We can chill for a bit.” He walked over to the side bleachers and took a seat.

“You know, I heard she’s a bitch. A regular see-you-next-Tuesday. At least, that’s what Ellen said,” Dean told Sam as he took his seat next to him on the bleachers.

“You and Castiel, I swear. I’m just looking. There is no harm in looking. Is there?” Sam barked.

“Whoa, with the hostility. I’m just telling you what I heard,” Dean replied.

“Well, I’ve already been told. Plus, Ruby is nice to me,” Sam defended.

“Yeah, it’s called manipulation. Look it up,” Dean remarked.

“Jerk.”

“Bitch.”

They watched the rest of the practice until Mick told everyone to pack up their things and that he’d see them tomorrow. Dean patted Sam on the back as a way of letting him know it was time to go. 

“I’ll meet you by the car in a minute,” Sam answered, distractedly. 

Dean followed Sam’s gaze which landed on Ruby. The flirtatious grin she was giving Sam was borderline maniacal. 

“What did we just talk about, man?” Dean grumbled.

“Oh, shut up. I can take care of myself. I don’t need everyone telling me what to do and who to trust. I obviously can’t convince you to cut your shit out. So, leave me alone.” Sam grabbed his backpack, then stormed off towards Ruby.

“Cut my shit?” When he saw Cas on the bleachers packing up his oboe, he knew what Sam meant. _Oh yeah… that shit._

He walked over to the Impala, then leaned up against the trunk, lost in thought, as he waited for Sam to finish whatever mess he was getting himself into. Dean was worried about the way Sam reacted towards Ruby. _Maybe we should have just gone home_. However, once he saw Cas walking towards the afternoon buses, he knew if someone waved a wand and sent him back in time he would have made the same decision. _Why can’t I stay away from you?_

Cas froze the moment he noticed Dean standing there. All of the color drained from his face. He looked like he was going to be sick.

His heart ached as he struggled to take a breath. He gave Cas a shy smile, just short of coy.

Cas’ face flushed as he smiled back, swallowing hard.

Dean’s smile turned goofy when he got a response from Cas. He giggled, actually giggled, like a thirteen-year-old girl, as he shied away from the other’s intense gaze. He stole another glance towards him.

Cas had his head tilted to his right with a puzzled expression.

Dean gave him one more grin which Cas returned with an awkward nod and darted towards the line of busses.

He caught a glimpse of the redhead, Charlie, walking with Sam towards the Impala. She was deep in conversation as if she was trying to convince Sam of something. “We’re trying to help you, Sam. Don’t fall for it. She’s a conniving bitch. Take it from someone who has known her for five years and learned the hard way.”

“Alright, Charlie. I heard you the first time,” Sam retorted.

“I like ya, kid. I wouldn’t tell you if I didn’t,” Charlie expressed with sincerity.

“I’ll see ya later, Charlie.” He waved at her.

“Later, Sam.” When Charlie saw Dean standing there, her expression turned glacial, and she glared at him. _Whoa! What did I do to warrant that from her?_ He recalled Sam’s earlier statement. _Probably the whole torturing Cas thing…_

“So, apparently, it’s not just Cas, Ellen, and myself who are warning you about this chick. Charlie is warning you, too. Think you should listen to at least one of us?” Dean snarked.

“Oh, fuck you.” Sam got into the passenger seat and slammed the door behind him.

 _Wow…_ They sat in relative silence the entire way back to the house.

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel spent the rest of his day trying to figure out what that little scene meant when he saw Dean standing over by his Impala.

**Charlie: I don’t know, Castiel. I think you’re reading into it. I talked to Jo about it. He's known for this. Of which, quite a few people have warned you about now. Including his brother.**

**Castiel: But you didn’t see what I saw, Charlie.**

**Charlie: I don’t care what I did or did not see! The guy is a fucker who is just going to continue to torture you.**

Castiel didn’t want to acknowledge she was probably right. He knew he didn't imagine something was different about what happened before he got to the bus. He admitted defeat anyway.

**Castiel: I know you’re right. I hate you for it. But I know you’re right.**

**Charlie: Geez… you and Sam. Stop pining over people that are bad for you.**

**Castiel: Hate to say it, but he’s going to have learn the hard way on that one.**

**Charlie: I like the kid. I know I just met him, but I don’t know. I just feel like he’s too precious for this world or some shit. He won’t learn until it’s too late.**

**Castiel: Too precious for this world…? Lmfao!**

**Charlie: Oh, shut the fuck up. You’re the one who’s obsessed with his brother.**

**Castiel: Hey! That’s not the reason why I’m friends with him!**

**Charlie: I know.**

Castiel did not like where the conversation was going.

**Charlie: I’m sorry, Castiel. I didn’t mean to imply that’s why you’re friends with him.**

**Castiel: I know. Look It’s been a long friggin week, and it’s only Thursday. I’m gonna go to bed.**

**Charlie:  Yeah… I think I am too. Night, Bestie <3**

**Castiel: Night <3**

He rolled onto his side and prayed the next day would be better than the past three. He knew he was asking for a miracle. He just hoped his instincts were wrong and that tomorrow would be a better day. Knowing his luck, it could always be worse.

 

>>>>>>

 

When Bobby got home from the shop, he was surprised to see Dean at the stove cooking. “Since when did you start cooking again?”

“I was hungry. We have a fridge filled with food. Why not?” Dean snapped.

“Watch your tone, boy!” Bobby barked.

Dean sighed after taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry. Sam and I were arguing about some chick that apparently is a serious bitch. At least, that’s what Ellen, Jo, Charlie, and Cas say.”

“He’s gonna have to learn on his own, son.” He patted Dean on the back as a form of comfort. “It smells delicious. What’re you making?”

“Baked potato soup,” Dean said with a smile.

“I knew I smelled bacon,” Bobby beamed back. “I’m gonna go wash up because…” He motioned his hands to himself.

Dean laughed. “I know the feeling.”

As Dean waited for the soup to finish, he decided to make some apple pie. He took out the ingredients from the pantry and the fridge, then slowly peeled the apples to ready them for the filling. His mind started to wander to thoughts of his mom. Imagining her glowing smile with a stripe of flour painting her cheek filled him with a wistful sorrow. He felt the ghost of her gentle touch when she would place her hand on his cheek and sweetly ask, “Who wants some pie?” It was their special activity. His most treasured memories. They would roll out the dough for the crust together. He would help her mix the spices, lemon juice, and sugar with the apple slices. They’d set the timer while she put the pie in the oven. Then he would bring over a chair and watched the pie bake like most people watch TV. Sam picks on him for his obsession and fascination with pie. However, most of the reasoning behind why he adores pie is because it reminds him of those stolen moments in time.

He slipped the pie into the oven and pulled over a chair to watch it bake. He was lost in the labyrinth of his memories as the crust started to turn a golden brown. _What have I done with my life? What would she think of me? I’m a failure and a coward._

Bobby walked into the kitchen and caught Dean as a single tear started to stream down his face. “What’s wrong, son?”

He wiped the tear from his face and plastered on a fake smile. “Nothing. Just sad that the pie takes so damn long to bake,” he laughed.

“Don’t lie to me.” Bobby grimaced.

He grabbed the oven mitts and pulled out the pie. Within seconds the timer started to go off. _Never needed one of those anyway. I have pie senses._ “Nothing is wrong, Bobby.”

“Uh-huh… That’s why I walked in here, and you looked like someone has kicked your puppy,” Bobby chastised.

“Just drop it, Bobby.” He put the pie on the counter, turned off the oven, then lowered the burner for the soup.

“Look, son. I know you have been putting a lot of stress on yourself lately. You’ve made your mistakes. We all have. Give it time. We have all the faith in the world in you.” Bobby put his hand on Dean’s shoulder.

Dean turned to glare at Bobby and was met with an expression of genuine sincerity. His face sobered and his stomach dropped. _I’m far from worthy of that love._ He threw the oven mitt on the counter. “Dinners ready.” He turned to leave the kitchen.

“Where are you going?” Bobby grabbed his shoulder.

“I forgot… to be hungry,” He shrugged Bobby’s hand off, then stormed towards his room where he slammed the door behind him. After he turned the lock, he threw himself onto the bed. He shot his band a quick text letting them know to be at his house the next day around six p.m. for practice before he threw his comforter over his head and tried to fall asleep.

Dean spent the night tossing and turning until he fell into a restless slumber. His nightmares filled with fire that licked his skin and burned away at his soul.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, everyone!!! Thank you so much for reading!!! Over 350 hits! I could cry with gratitude. Again, thank you! Please take note of the updated tags. Alastair is a serious dick... to be honest, that's an understatement, but you'll see what I mean. As always, comments are more than welcomed! Enjoy :)

The next morning Dean woke up to the sound of knocking on his bedroom door. “Dean? It’s 6:15. You plan on going to work today?”

At that moment, Dean knew he would have put The Flash to shame. It took him just under five minutes to shower and groom. He was dressed in a pair of jeans and a white collared shirt within another two minutes. Then he finished his morning routine by grabbing a travel mug of coffee, his guitar, cellphone, and backpack before running out the door by 6:25.

He spent the drive to the school chastising himself for oversleeping. Especially considering the fact of how early he had gone to bed the night before. _Well, it’s not like you actually slept for most of it._

He pulled into the school and headed straight to Ellen’s office. She was already waiting at the side door, keys in hand “Morning! You look like hell.”

“Mmm-hmm,” he grumbled and made a beeline to the auditorium. _I cannot deal with anyone’s shit today. It’s not happening._

By the time stage lights were on and he dragged his seat to the edge of the stage, Dean was emotionally destroyed. Between how close he was to fucking up that morning and the fact that he could still smell the remnants of smoke and hospital rooms from his nightmares, he needed to decompress. This was the only way he knew how. _Well, not the only way..._

He knew the song that would escape him before his finger even started to strum against the strings of his fine-tuned guitar. “Mama told me. When I was young. ‘Come sit beside me, my only son. And listen closely to what I say. And if you do this it will help you some sunny day.” The stress and pain of his nightmares washed over him. He felt just as raw as he did his first day back to the high school. Considering the subject matter, he knew that was an understatement. He let the words of the song wash over him. Several times he heard his voice crack with the overwhelming agony and helplessness he was feeling. He could feel the tears begin to pool in his eyes. He was trying his best to keep the levee from breaking. He didn’t want to reach the point where he would be inconsolable. Especially since he was technically at work.

When he finished the final notes, he bent down and rubbed the bridge of his nose trying to calm his nerves. He wiped the length of his face to cast away the tears that stubbornly escaped him, then got up and put his guitar on the stand. In the corner of his eye, he could see movement in the backstage by the doors. He froze. He was petrified where he stood when he saw it was Castiel. His face was held in an expression of awe. _Don’t look at me like that. I don’t deserve that. I’m nothing special. Obviously… look at me._

“How long have you been standing there?”

“Since the second verse,” Castiel stated.

“Okay.” He breathed while he continued to inspect the floor. _Fucking perfect._

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude. I was walking to Ms. Moseley’s office when I saw the side door open and heard someone singing. I didn’t know it was you,” he continued nervously.

“It’s okay, Cas.” He still refused to look up at Cas. _Why did he have to walk in today of all mornings?_

“Again, I’m sorry. I’ll leave you to it.” He heard Cas turn to leave.

“What did you think?” he blurted to get him to stay. _Don’t leave… Stay… Please…_ He didn’t know what he wanted.

“Excuse me?” he asked, turning back.

“I said, what did you think?” he could hear the weakness in his voice.

“Honestly?”

He nodded yes.

“May sound corny or whatever, but I could feel your soul crying out for something. You lost yourself in the music. It was beautiful. I stood by the door with my eyes closed just listening to you before my curiosity got the best of me and I had to see who it was.”

 _Fuck…_ Those words meant more to him than he could possibly say. From the earnest expression in Cas’ eyes, Dean knew he meant every word.

Of course, instead of telling him so, he did the next worse thing.

 

>>>>>>

 

_“Spend your lives in sin and misery, in the house of the rising sun…”_

Castiel swiped at his phone to turn it off. _Fuck my life._ He spent a couple of minutes staring at the ceiling before he rolled out of bed and went to the bathroom for a shower. He didn’t have a bad night’s sleep, but he definitely didn’t sleep well. _I just want it to be the weekend already._ He let the water run over his back and leaned against the wall of the shower. _Please let today end quickly._ He turned off the water and grabbed the towel from the rack. He rushed through his morning routine before he haphazardly shoved his gym clothes into his backpack. To appease his mom, he grabbed a banana before he kissed her goodbye and gave Hannah a hug. Even though he was far from hungry, he peeled it when he got on the bus and shoved it down his throat. _Ugh… now I’m gonna be sick._

During the short ride to the school, he decided to text Charlie to let her know he would be going to see Ms. Moseley before the first period. He loved Charlie, but he needed Ms. Moseley right now to help him sort through his feelings. She messaged him back right away, letting him know it was okay and that she would be hanging out with Jo and Ash if he decided to meet up with her anyway. He wasn’t going to, but he thanked her. When he walked into the school he made his way towards the music corridor. Instead of turning left, which he usually did every morning, he continued straight towards the choir room.

As he was passing the auditorium, he saw the backstage door was left ajar and could hear someone singing. He decided to sneak in and listen. Whoever it was, was playing the guitar and losing themselves in the lyrics of the song. “And be a simple kind of man hmm be something you love and understand. Baby, be a simple kind of man oh, won’t you do this for me son, if you can, if you can.”

Castiel was mesmerized. He closed his eyes to listen. The singer’s soul was crying out in misery as he continued to play and sing. “Forget your lust for the rich man's gold. All that you need is in your soul. And you can do this, oh, baby, if you try. All that I want for you, my son, is to be satisfied.” He continued to listen until his curiosity got the best of him and he had to see who it was.

His breath hitched when he saw Dean was sitting on a folding chair at the front of the stage playing for no one. He didn’t notice Castiel was watching him from backstage. A fact that he was currently using to his advantage. After Dean sang the last few lyrics of the song he saw him bow his head for a few moments before he wiped his right hand down the length of his face. He stood up and turned to the backstage so he could put the guitar on the stand. That’s when he noticed Castiel standing there and froze. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Since the second verse,” Castiel stated.

“Okay,” he barely whispered, looking down.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude. I was walking to Ms. Moseley’s office when I saw the side door open and heard someone singing. I didn’t know it was you,” he continued nervously.

“It’s okay, Cas.” He still refused to look up at Castiel.

“Again, I’m sorry. I’ll leave you to it.” He turned to leave.

“What did you think?”

“Excuse me?” he questioned.

“I said, what did you think?”

“Honestly?”

He nodded yes.

“May sound corny or whatever, but I could feel your soul crying out for something. You lost yourself in the music. It was beautiful. I stood by the door with my eyes closed just listening to you before my curiosity got the best of me and I had to see who it was.”

He saw a wide spread of emotions crossover Dean’s face before he settled on one. “You stood there with your eyes closed just listening to me. Dude, don’t do that. It’s just creepy,” he jested with a smirk.

Castiel was mortified. He had never felt so insulted. Which in his opinion was saying something. He narrowed his eyes in disgust. “You know? Whatever. You asked. I answered. You don’t like it? Try not asking for honesty next time.” He turned and headed for the auditorium door.

“Cas, no wait! I didn’t mean to! I’m no good at… ah, fuck.” Castiel left and slammed the door behind him.

He didn’t bother going to Ms. Moseley’s. He barged through the door of the bathroom across the hall from the auditorium and lost it. He threw his backpack against the wall and grabbed the back of his head before angry tears started to stream down his face. The irrational wave of emotions that started to seep from every pore was quickly taking over his primary motor functions. There was so much power behind the kick when he hit his backpack that it ended up in the handicap stall at the back of the bathroom. He followed it there and slammed the stall door closed behind him. There, in the privacy of the stall, he finally let his illogical emotions hit him. He felt like such an idiot, crying in the bathroom over someone he had been warned about, countless times now. He tried to regain a bit of his composure before he exited the stall and went to look at himself in the mirror. The evidence of his tears was apparent from the tinge of crimson at the rims and the sclera. He splashed some water on his face and took some paper towel to dry it. After one final inspection, he decided he looked somewhat presentable, grabbed his bag, and exited the bathroom.

When he left the bathroom, Dean was exiting the auditorium. They both froze where they stood, staring at each other. Dean was clearly about to say something when Brady and Alastair walked by, laughing at Castiel “What’s up, faggot?” Brady asked.

“Suck a dick in there or something, you fucking fairy?” Alastair followed. They continued there leisurely stroll down the hallway when they saw the reaction they wanted. They had added insult to the injury that was already starting to turn gangrenous. New tears were threatening to fall. He leaned his head back took a deep breath and walked away not even bothering to look at Dean as he passed him.

His hand was just about to touch the choir room door. A place where he knew he could seek the comfort of Ms. Moseley when the bell rang overhead letting him know that he had to go to his first class. _Fucking Christ! I just want to go home. I knew I shouldn’t have gotten out of bed this morning._

 

>>>>>>

 

When Castiel slammed the door to the auditorium behind him, Dean started to panic. _What the fuck is wrong with you?!?! You can’t just say, “Thanks Cas. That means a lot.” You just had to be a schmuck about it?!?!_

He was going to run after him to fix the horrible mistake that he had just made when he looked down at his watch and realized what time it was. _It’s 7:12!? FUCK!!!_ He turned off the lights and cleaned up the stage. He put his guitar in the corner where he knew no one would look and picked up his bag before he exited the auditorium.

He saw Cas standing in front of the bathroom with his eyes swollen and red. _Fuck… I did that. Why do you keep doing this to him? Why can’t you just be honest with him and tell him that for some reason he’s different? Just fucking talk to him!_

He was about to say these exact words to him when he froze at the snide snarling grin of the demon of his nightmares. _Alastair_ …

He could feel his skin crawl as the monster in front of him curled his lips in a repulsive sneer towards him before he turned his attention towards Cas.

“What’s up, faggot?” asked the smug blonde walking with Alastair.

“Suck a dick in there or something, you fucking fairy?” Alastair followed.

_WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!?!?!?!_

Dean was seething with rage. He knew that Alastair was a prick, but seriously? Dean turned to look at Cas and saw how broken he was. He took a deep shaking breath and walked away.

Dean was balling his hands into fists with a grip so strong he could feel his nails making half-moon cuts into his palms. He turned to his right to go after Alastair and the other bastard with blonde hair, but he was too late. The bell rang and he had to give the keys back to Ellen before he met Mick in the band room.

He saw Cas turn the corner to go towards the technology hallway. He wanted to run after him, too, and tell him how sorry he was. The keys he had to return were weighing heavy in his hand. Unfortunately, he knew he had to take care of his responsibilities first. He dragged his feet towards Ellen’s office and knocked on the door.

She looked at him with a small smile. “Wanna tell me what’s going on with you today?”

“Nope.” He tossed the keys to her which she caught with her right hand. She was going to retort, but he was out the door before she had a chance to say a word.

He spent the rest of the morning trying to solve the problem that was Cas. He had no idea how to talk to this guy. He knew there was something different about him. He spent way too much time thinking about his smile, his eyes, or the way his ass looked in his jeans… _Wrong train of thought, Dean._

If Mick or Rufus were upset that Dean was there after the morning bell had already rung they didn’t mention it. He basically yessed them to death the entire morning. It went straight over Mick’s head, but he could tell that Rufus was getting annoyed. He couldn’t pay attention to them when his own mind was going a mile a minute trying to figure out what he was going to say to Cas fifth period, during music theory. The only logical conclusion that he could come up with that would even come close to making it up to Cas, was by being honest for once.

He walked into the classroom with a heavy heart and took a deep breath. “Hey, Cas.”

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel could tell Sam knew something was wrong. His red eyes said it all, but he was happy that Sam didn’t push him to tell him what happened. Instead, he just tried to cheer him up as they worked on the car together. Castiel was thankful to have Sam there with him. It wasn’t the first time since he met him that he felt that way. He was quickly becoming one of Castiel’s favorite people.

Just like yesterday, Mr. Singer told everyone to go wash up five minutes before class ended. They shared a sink once more. Sam flicked him with the excess water that was on his hands after they washed up. He couldn’t help the smile that threatened to split his face in two. The troubles of the morning were being pushed to the back of his mind with the help of his new friend. When the bell rang, he said goodbye to Sam and headed towards psychology in a better mood.

His morning went smoothly. He took notes, answered questions, asked them too, and did everything any student should do.

When he got to music theory, he was prepared to face Dean. He sat down at his piano taking out his usual supplies when he saw the shadow over his piano.

“Hey, Cas.” Dean looked down at Castiel with an apologetic smile.

“Hello, Mr. Winchester. Can I help you with something?” he asked calmly.

“Don’t be like that,” He closed his eyes and shook his head.

“Like what?” he questioned with a stoic expression.

“You know what. I want to apologize for what I said to you this morning. It was uncalled for and I’m sorry that I upset you. I just… I don’t know how… Son of a bitch,” he said sitting at the piano next to Castiel, turning his chair to face him. He hunched over, rubbing his hands through hair before he put both elbows on his knees and looked up at Castiel “Why is it so hard to tell…?” Castiel cut him off by putting his hand up. Dean sat up straight, worry etched on his beautiful face. He was obviously conflicted about telling him something, but Castiel was done with his shit.

“Look, I don’t care. I’m seriously done. With all of it. So, please, just do whatever it is you’re here to do and leave me alone. Okay?” Castiel held his gaze with all the strength he still had left in him.

Dean’s shoulders slumped as he looked at Castiel with pain in his eyes. “Cas, please, I’m trying to…”

“Dean, drop it. Okay?” Castiel faced forward.

Dean continued to face Castiel until the bell rang. This time he knew he wasn’t imagining that Dean was looking at him. Unfortunately, he lost every fuck he had to give when he exited the bathroom that morning.

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean could tell once the fifth period ended that Rufus was pissed. He saw the entire exchange that happened between the two of them. He walked up to him with trepidation. “Look. I get it. Leave him alone. I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Especially after what you just saw. So, don’t read me the riot act, please. I got the hint from him to leave him alone. Okay?”

If it was possible, he saw Rufus’ face soften. “Well… At least I don’t have to give you shit again about all of this. Now, I’m not sure you even took any notes this time considering how hard your eyes were boring into the side of that kid’s face the entire period. Do you have any questions?” Dean smiled and went over the few notes he did have with Rufus.

He spent the rest of the day in an endless loop of ‘What if?’

What if he had said what he really felt rather than being a dick about things? What if he went after Alastair and whoever that blonde haired fuck was like he really wanted to?

He knew one thing for sure. The next time he saw Alastair, he was not going to let him get away with what he said.

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel gave it everything he had on the elliptical when he got to the weight room. Charlie spent most of the period giving him sideways glances. She wanted to make a comment, he could tell, but she knew better than to question him. He was clearly irate and had something that he needed to work through. It would only make things worse by prying. They parted when they went to their separate locker rooms.

The fact that Alastair and his clan of worthless twits were once again sharing the same locker room was deplorable, to say the least. Their constant bombardment of insults and their harassment that was boarding on psychological torture were a burden that he no longer wanted to bare. He tried his best to ignore it. However, they were persistent. It was eighth grade all over again. _They wouldn’t be stupid enough to try what they did to me…_ He stopped that train of thought in its tracks.

When ninth period finally arrived, he was so elated to see Ms. Moseley he nearly ran her over in her office. She wrapped her arms around him and held him close. The comfort he was feeling from her was the straw that broke the camel’s back. He broke down in tears as he sunk into her warm embrace “Shh, Honey, what’s wrong? It’s okay. It will be okay. I’m right here, sugar.” Her sweet melodic voice made him choke on his tears. He felt like he couldn’t breathe. The weight of the day was crushing him. Her soothing words were barely raising him up from the pit that he has been buried in since that morning.

She slowly maneuvered him over to the couch that was against the wall and sat next to him. “You don’t have to go back out there. Okay? I want you to stay in here until the end of class. You hear?” He nodded his head between sobs. She put her hand on his back, rubbing it in soothing circles until the bell rang. “We’ll talk later.” She stood and closed the office door behind her.

He rested his head on one of the pillows that were delicately placed on the couch and curled up into a fetal position. He barely fit on the loveseat. Nevertheless, he grasped another pillow close to his chest and cried the days worth of unshed tears into it before he fell asleep.

He awoke to a gentle touch on his arm. The kind expression that Ms. Moseley was showing him was enough to force the levee to break once more. Fresh tears started to pool in his eyes. She knelt by his side for a while stroking his hair and softly saying, “Shh”. When he finally started to feel himself calm down, he sat up and ran his hands through hair before he wiped his eyes. She backed away and brought over one of the chairs in front of her desk to face him. She looked at him. “Do you want to talk about it? It’s ok if you don’t want to. I’m here for you either way.” He nodded. She grabbed him a box of tissues from her desk and a bottle of water from the mini-fridge he knew she fought long and hard to get.

After he blew his nose and took a few sips of water, he told her about his day from hell. He despised that when he told her what the goons in the locker room had said to him that he started to choke and stutter over fresh tears.

“Castiel, you know how proud I am of you? How much respect I have for you? You are so brave. You have the strength that many would kill to have. I’m so sorry that those kids still don’t see what they’re doing is wrong. There is no easy way to deal with people like that. I know it sounds cliché, but ignore them. Hopefully, they’ll get the point.” He could tell that she didn’t truly believe the words that she was saying. He tried his best to ignore that. “I do want you to promise me one thing.” She held his gaze. “Promise me that you’ll give em’ hell if they ever try to hurt you again. Do you understand me?”

Castiel nodded and took some deep breaths to calm himself down. “Thank you, Ms. Moseley. I can’t even begin to tell you how grateful I am to have you in my life.” He looked down as he wiped a few more fresh tears from his cheek.

“Anytime, sugar.” He looked up at her quickly and smiled before he let his head rest in his hands with his elbows on his knees.

They sat in silence for a moment or two. “Do you want me to take you home?” She was looking out of her office window. The after school bell had long since rung and the buses were long gone. “I’m pretty sure you missed the bus.” She turned back to him with a calming smile.

He smiled at her, ran his hands through his hair, and nodded emphatically. “If you wouldn’t mind. I don’t want to wait for the after school bus.”

“Of course. I wouldn’t do that to you.” They both collected their things and made their way out to her green Ford sedan.

Castiel saw the Impala in the parking lot and looked the other way when he saw Dean in the driver seat with his window open listen to Led Zeppelin. He could feel his eyes on him as they exited the parking lot.

He spent the ride home wondering if he was still in the parking lot waiting for him. _Don’t kid yourself. You know better._

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean took his time out on the football field. He knew he didn’t have to worry about Sam because he was going to Kevin’s after school. Time was definitely on his side. He needed to confront Alastair and knew for a fact that prick would be out on the field.

Even with taking his time, it didn’t take him very long to clear the field. The marching band didn’t need as many field markers anymore. Which was not surprising.

After fifteen long minutes, he finally saw Alastair strutting onto the field with a salacious grin on his repugnant face. _God, I hate this son of a bitch._ “Dean, Dean, Dean, to what do I owe the pleasure of your company this fine afternoon?”

“I knew you were a dick, Al. I didn’t realize you were a bigoted prick, as well.” He was balling his hands into fists like he did that morning. Ready to strike if necessary.

Alastair narrowed his eyes at Dean. “I’m not sure I know what you mean.”

“What the fuck was those comments this morning with Castiel?” he growled at Alastair.

A stomach churning grin broke out across his face. “Why? You like the little homo or something, Dean?”

“What the fuck is wrong with you!?” Dean was starting to have a hard time reining in his anger. _Not here, dumbass. Not here!_

“Look, Dean, it’s none of your concern what I or my friends do with the little angel.” He mockingly put his hands up and flapped them like wings before he threw them to his sides. “So, if you’ll excuse me, I have a practice to attend.”

Alastair went to walk away. Dean paid him the same respect that Alastair had paid him on Wednesday and gripped his arm harder than was ever necessary. _I hope it bruises, you sick, sadistic fuck._ “I’m only going to say this once, Al. Leave him alone. You got that, dick bag?”

“Or what? You'll work me over? But then, maybe you don't want to. Maybe you're, ah, scared to,” Alastair singsonged.

Dean instantly released his arm as if it were on fire. He pointed a finger at him and gave him a withering glare. “Look. You have one chance. One. Trust me when I say I have ideas on how to handle you, dick. Leave him alone.” Dean grabbed the bag and stormed off towards the school. He could hear Alastair laughing in the background. _Fuck him. I’m not afraid of him. Fucking dickhead._

He went to the band room and dropped off the field bag and picked up his backpack. He said goodbye to Mick who was still sitting at his desk reviewing notes. Quickly, he stopped by the auditorium to pick up the guitar that he had hidden earlier that day and made his way out to his Baby.

When he passed the choir room window, he saw Ms. Moseley peer out the window. She narrowed her eyes at him. He paused and looked back at her smiling and waved. _What the fuck is that for?_ He glanced behind her and saw someone with unruly dark brown hair sitting on her couch with their head in their hands. _Oh… that’s why…_

Dean looked down at his watch. It was 2:35. _Oh, please, dear God, don’t let him take the late bus!_ He knew Alastair wouldn’t be on one of those buses, but he still wouldn’t put it past him to leave practice early just to fuck with him.

He put his guitar and backpack in the trunk and hopped into the driver’s seat waiting for Castiel to exit the school. _If he is taking the late bus… I just want to make sure he’s ok…_ He looked in the rearview mirror towards the door he entered every morning before work. _Stop fucking kidding yourself, Dean. Did you not just witness the shit you pulled out on the football field with Al?_ _Name one other person on this earth you would do something stupid like that for besides Sammy..._

He put the key into the ignition and Led Zeppelin’s _In Through the Out Door_ was in the tape deck. As luck would have it "All of My Love" started playing as Castiel closely followed Ms. Moseley out to her green '08 Ford Fusion. He looked at the radio and rolled his eyes. _Drop a few more hints for me, why don’t you! Like I didn’t already get the fucking memo that he’s different._ “Dick,” he mumbled.

He turned to his left and saw Castiel wait by the passenger door for Ms. Moseley to unlock the car. Dean could see that Castiel had obviously been crying. His hair was more of a wreck than usual and his eyes were swollen. _I’m so sorry._ He knew that he was at least part of the reason why his face looked like that. Castiel ducked to get into the passenger seat of the sedan once it was unlocked. He knew that Castiel saw him. His Baby was hard to miss. The fact that Castiel had his head hung low in an obvious attempt to avoid Dean was the biggest hint.

As he watched her pull out of the parking lot, he smiled. The fact that Ms. Moseley drove him home rather than him taking the bus pleased him more than he cared to admit. _Regardless of whether he hates me or not, at least I know he’s safe._ He pulled out of the space and made his way home to do some homework and eat before his band came over for practice.

 

>>>>>>

 

Ms. Moseley and Castiel sat in a comfortable silence as she drove him home. At the only red light that they would hit on the short drive to Castiel’s house, she stole a quick glance to check up on him. His shoulders were slumped, heavy with defeat. She hated seeing her angel in so much pain. He has never done anything to warrant the abuse that those demons have put him through for years. She put her hand on his back and rubbed it as a form of comfort. Castiel gave her a weak smile before the light turned green and he faced back towards the passenger window.

When they turned into the Shurley’s driveway, Ms. Moseley parked her car and walked up to the house with him. She didn’t allow him to tell her no. Becky had a right to know what was going on and she knew that Castiel probably still had not bothered to tell her. After he unlocked the door, he hollered “Hey, Mom, I’m home.” She could hear the patter of tiny feet as Hannah ran towards them through the kitchen. Castiel took a knee so he could give her a big hug. He motioned for Ms. Moseley to come inside as Becky walked to the front door.

“Missouri! What a surprise! It’s so great to see you!” Becky said with an enormous smile before she gave her a hug.

“Becky! It’s been too long,” Missouri agreed as she hugged her back.

“Come in! Why don’t we have a cup of tea and talk?” she asked while motioning for her to go take a seat in the kitchen.

“That sounds perfect. Thank you.” She gave her a soft smile.

“I’m going to go to my room. I… I think I’m going to go to bed. I don’t really feel well.” Castiel murmured while looking at his shoes.

“Are you okay? Do you need anything, honey?” Becky questioned, her eyebrows furrowed in concern.

“No. I’m fine. I just want to go to bed,” he stated.

Becky turned to look at Missouri quickly. _Let the boy be. He’s cried enough today._

She saw Becky nod her head slightly, almost as if she could read what Missouri was saying with that one look.

“Okay. I’ll come and check on you later.” She cupped his face to make him look at her. “I love you, honey. Get some rest.” She gently patted him on the cheek and pulled him down to kiss his forehead. _The boy has gotten too tall…_

He turned to Missouri. “Thank you again for taking me home.”

“Anytime, sweetheart. You get some rest now.” She gave him a wave.

“Goodnight.”

Missouri watched Becky’s expression change as soon as Castiel left the room and took the stairs down to his room. She was far from stupid. She knew there are only a few reasons why Missouri would turn up at her doorstep unannounced. None of them were good.

Missouri was momentarily distracted by Hannah who was more than a little excited to have a guest over. “Honey?” Hannah turned away from Missouri to look at her mother. “Why don’t you go into the living room for a little bit? Missouri and I have to talk.”

Hannah didn’t fight her mother. There was no threat of a temper tantrum. She simply smiled, walked over, and gave her a hug. “Okay, Mommy.” Without another word, she went to the living room to play.

Becky sat down next to Missouri. They both watched as Hannah went to her dollhouse in the living room. “She’s gotten so big, Becky! She’s a little angel. You’ve been a great mom to all of your kids.” She smiled at her sweetly.

“I try.”

They sat in silence for a few moments, watching Hannah play when the kettle started to whistle. Becky turned off the stove and took the kettle off the burner. Missouri watched Becky busy herself in the kitchen. She brought over mugs and a tea box so Missouri could take her time making a selection. By the time Missouri finally selected some organic earl grey tea, Becky had already finished bringing over the remaining items. The final two were a plate warmer and the kettle. They both tore open their bags and waited for their tea to finish steeping.

“What happened today?” Becky regarded Missouri with worried eyes and took a deep breath as she bounced the tea bag on its string in the hot water. “He can lie to me and say everything is fine, but he’s been off all week. Now, today, you’re the one to drop him off at home? Not that I’m not happy to see you, I am, but the last time you dropped him off... I can’t…” She trailed off and took a stuttering breath. Neither of them dared speak about that day unless it was entirely necessary.

“I know. It wasn’t close to anything as bad as what happened then. But I ain’t gonna lie, sugar, it wasn’t good either.” She removed her tea bag from the cup and placed it in the bowl that Becky had brought over for this specific reason. “I don’t understand why Principal Roman and Vice Principal Crowley still haven’t done something to keep him away from those little devils. They were harassing him again this morning.” She paused. She knew Becky would not be happy about the next fact. “And during gym... in the locker room.” Missouri blew on her tea.

“Excuse me? Did you say in the locker room? He has gym with them? What the fuck is wrong with this school district? Are they so quick to forget everything?” she asked, her voice shrill with sheer horror.

“They weren’t doing anything like that. They were calling him names. Not that it makes it any better.” She put a hand on Becky’s forearm to calm her. “I think they saw an opportunity to kick him while he’s down and really went for it today. I’m gonna be honest with you, Becky.” Becky looked up as she was stirring in the honey she had just put in her tea. She was still shaking with the obvious rage she was feeling. “They aren’t the only people he’s been having trouble with this past week.” They both spared a quick glance at Hannah who was making funny faces at her dolls. Giving each of them different voices. They couldn’t help but smile.

“Who else has been picking on him? Do I have to call the school and say something?” she asked. turning back to Missouri.

“No. It’s a boy.”

Becky raised an eyebrow at her.

“And he ain’t picking on him. Castiel fell hard and I’m afraid that his feelings will not be reciprocated.”

Becky was furrowing her eyebrows with confusion as she continued to listen.

“I used to have him as a student. The boy’s a serious flirt. Castiel has unfortunately fallen for the boy’s antics.” Missouri looked down at her mug while shaking her head. “I’ve spoken to him about this, but you know the heart wants what it wants. He’ll move on eventually. For right now, he’s stuck.”

“You **had** him as a student?” She asked raising another eyebrow at her.

“Yeah, he’s a student teacher now. He’s assisting Mr. Turner and Mr. Davies this semester for college credit. He’s not a bad kid or anything. He’s just a flirt. Eventually, both of them will move on.”

“Missouri? Do I have to make a phone call to the school?” She looked at her with concern still in her eyes.

“No. Don’t worry. I’ll look after Castiel for ya. I’ll even say something to Dean if he hasn’t already gotten the hint.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, Castiel, kind of told him off today. That’s why I’m saying that those devils saw an opportunity to kick him while he was down and went for it.” She took another sip of her tea.

“Well, if the kid still doesn’t get it, please do say something to get him to stop. I really do not have a problem making a call or going down there if I must. My kid has been tormented enough.”

Missouri drained the last of her tea and stood up. “I will. You know I will, sugar. Listen, Becky, don’t push Castiel to talk about any of this, okay? You know him.”

Becky nodded her head in confirmation.

“I wanted to let you know what was going on because I knew he wasn’t going to say anything, but I have to get home.”

“Of course.” They walked over to the front door and hugged one another. “Thank you for talking to me and always being there for my son, Missouri. You have no idea how happy it makes me to know you’re there for him when I can’t be.”

“I love the kid like he’s one of my own. It’s my pleasure.” With a final smile, she walked over to her car. When she put the car into reverse, she watched Becky close the door. She could only hope that Becky would leave Castiel be. At least for now.

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel was numb. He got dressed in his pajamas and crawled into bed. He curled into a ball, facing away from the door, and prayed that his mom wouldn’t come to check up on him. He knew that part of the reason Ms. Moseley took him home was that she wanted to talk to his mom about everything that had been going on during the week. He knew he should be upset, but mostly he was just thankful that he didn’t have to be the one to say anything. He didn’t have it in him at the moment.

He set the alarm on his phone so he could get up for work the next day and then closed his eyes. He drifted off praying that the nightmares wouldn’t come back.

 

>>>>>>

 

Pam called an end to practice early. “Look, Chachi, we need you to be here with us during practice. Not somewhere else in the fucking clouds doing God knows what.”

“I’m…”

“No excuses, Winchester!” She started to grab her stuff to pack up and go home.

“Look. I’m not making excuse! It really has not been the best fucking week. I’ve been thrown a lot of fucking curveballs. I’m sorry that I’m not all here,” he said while pointing at the ground at his feet, “right now. But I’m trying.”

“Al goes to the school where he’s working,” Benny said to Garth and Pam. Dean glared at Benny. “Someone had to say something, brotha.”

Pam’s eyes opened wide. “That twat waffle goes to your alma mater!?”

“Seriously!?” Garth’s slack-jawed expression was almost cartoonish. He had to stifle his laughter.

“Yes. Seriously. And avoiding him out on the football field hasn’t been easy because he’s the schools QB,” he stated while looking at his feet.

“That’s not all. Is it?”

He looked up at Pam who was narrowing her eyes at him with her arms crossed over her chest. “What the hell does that mean?” he snapped at her. A little… well, way over defensive if he was trying to prove that there was nothing else.

“Who is it?” She raised an eyebrow at him.

“No one…” he mumbled.

“So, it is someone?” Garth spoke up.

“Can we just fucking drop it. Look, he has noth…” _Oh fuck…_

“He?” Benny was the next to join in on the fun.

“Oh, fuck all of you!” Dean shouted.

All of them were snickering with one another. “So, really it has nothing to do with Al and everything to do with Dean hasn’t been laid in the past few weeks and now he’s pissed that the piece of ass he wants doesn’t want him back,” Pam snarked.

“Wrong,” Dean huffed.

“Then what?” she spat.

“It’s more… It’s nothing. Doesn’t matter.” He kicked an empty soda can on the floor.

“It has to be ‘more’ if it’s got your panties in a twist, Winchester,” Pam retorted.

“I’m not wearing panties... today,” he snorted.

“Ugh!!! Gross!!! TMI, Dean!” Garth groaned.

“Can I say something?” Benny interjected. “Dean, you said it’s more. If it’s more, then tell him. What can you lose  by telling the truth, brotha?”

_Everything…_

“If this past summer has taught you anything, I think that being honest would be at the top of that list.”

There was a silence that spread throughout the garage for a couple of moments.

“Look. I don’t have all fucking night. Mama’s gots to get laid. And I got a sorority girl’s ass with my name on it so,... are we done?” Pam asked.

“Yeah, sure. Go get some ass,” Dean chuckled. “Wanna try again Sunday?”

It was a unanimous yes.

Benny walked over to Dean while Garth helped Pam with her set and put a hand on his shoulder. “Brotha, you and I have been through a lot together. Hell, I’m the one who fought that demon bitch off when she came to call after you turned her away. “ They laughed. “But if there is one thing I know, it’s when you ain’t being honest with yourself. Tell him how you feel. Holding shit back ain’t ever done you one bit of good.”

“Thanks, Benny.” He gave him a quick hug and then walked over to the garage door to prepare to lock it behind them.

After everything had been locked up he went into the house through the back to the kitchen. He opened the fridge and grabbed himself a bottle of water then quickly downed it.

“Thirsty much?” Sam’s enormous figure was blocking the kitchen entrance.

“When did you get home, Samsquatch?” he asked as he grabs another bottle. This time only sipping it after he opened it.

“I’m only an inch taller than you. You know that, right?”

He gave Sam a once-over. “Whatever. You’re still too tall for your age and you’re still growing, gigantor.”

Sam rolled his eyes.

“So...again, when did you get home?” Dean asked.

“About an hour ago. Bobby picked me up.”

Dean nodded with understanding.

“Look. I want to go to the library tomorrow and I was wondering if I could get a ride.”

Dean turned to him, making a satisfied, “Ah,” after taking his last sip. “Sure. Why not?” he asked. He took a closer look at Sam and saw hesitation behind his statement. He rolled his eyes and huffed, “Sam, I always take you to the library on Saturday. It’s your favorite fucking hangout. What’s the matter now?”

Sam looked down at the floor. “That was before…”

“Before what?”

He avoided the question with one of his own. “Do you plan on going inside with me this time?”

Dean narrowed his eyes at him. “Yeah… I was planning on picking up a movie or two. For some reason, the fire stick doesn’t have a good spaghetti western selection. I do not know why…” He paused during his ramble. “Why do you want to know whether or not I’m going inside this time?”

“Because…” he mumbled.

“Because of what?” He motioned his hands for him to continue.

“Because Castiel works there.”

That was honestly the last thing he expected him to say. “Oh…” His surprise instantly changed to irritation. “So, what? Now, because you know he works there, I’m not allowed at the library anymore?”

“No. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m only...”

Dean cut him off. “You’re saying that I can’t control myself or some shit? That I’m gonna harass him while he’s at work. Is that what you’re trying to say?”

“Look, all I know is that today I saw one of my friends come into the shop with nothing but the pain in his eyes. Pain that I know, regardless of whether he told me or not, was partly because of you!”

Dean was shocked by Sam’s attack. He knew he shouldn’t be. _It’s because you know he’s right._

“I don’t know what your plans are or why you seem desperate to hurt him, but enough is enough! I don’t want you to go into the library because I know you can’t stay away.”

“You don’t know that. You can’t know that!” he snubbed.

“I know you, Dean! Better than you know yourself it seems,” Sam huffed and went to storm out of the room.

“I won’t bother him. I promise. I’ll go in and grab the movies and walk away. I swear. I don’t mean to… I don’t want to… I feel…” Sam looked at him like he had three heads. _Get the words out, Dean!_ “I won’t bother him.”

“You promise you won’t bother him?” Sam raised a questioning eyebrow at him.

“Yes.”

“You’re going to leave him alone?”

He rolled his eyes. “For fuck's sake, Sam! Am I talking to myself? I said yes!”

“Okay.” He smiled. “Library closes at 1. I want to get there by like 11:30 or 12:00 at the latest.”

“Okay.”

“Great.”

“Mmm-hmm," he grumbled. He left the kitchen and took his bottle of water to his room where he locked the door behind him.

He spent the next few hours trying to decide whether or not he was going to listen to Sam and leave Cas alone. Or listen to Benny and tell him the truth.

_Sam was right… I can’t leave him alone..._


	9. Chapter Nine

_"Can you hear me, Major Tom, can you hear me, major Tom, Can you hear me am…”_

Castiel swiped left on his phone to turn his alarm off. He had slept over fifteen hours. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes with his hands, removing some of the crust that had developed there overnight in the process. He then stretched while still lying in bed and yawned. _I really needed that._

He put both feet on the ground and tilted his head back and forth to crack it. After wincing from the sound of his neck popping, he stretched again by putting his hands up in the air, knitting his fingers together, and tilting from side to side like he did with his neck. He heard and felt a few things pop.

 _Fuck, I must be getting old._ He chuckled at the thought and grabbed some clothing he could change into after his shower.

The shower was soothing. He thought about the task that his boss, Joshua, had told him he had planned for him. Strangely enough, he was looking forward to it. The library he worked at had a massive CD selection that had to be reorganized and alphabetized. It was a tedious task, but he looked forward to taking some of them home. He needed new music for his phone.  _Thank God I asked for the sixty-four gigabytes._

After his shower, he got dressed in a pair of black slacks, black shoes, a white undershirt, and a white collared shirt. He left the top three buttons of the collared shirt undone. Buttoning up the entire shirt meant feeling like he was choking. He would only suffer from that kind of torment for special occasions. Work was not one of them.

When he entered the kitchen to grab a quick breakfast, his dad was already sitting at the kitchen table waiting for him. Hannah was on the chair next to him staring at the laces of her shoes that she was holding in her hands. Her eyebrows furrowed with a perplexed expression. “Good morning.” He waved at the both of them with a small smile.

“Good morning, Castiel!” Hannah beamed up at Castiel, laces still in hand “I’m tying my own shoes! See?!”

“I see.” He raised his eyebrows. “Need any help?”

Her face was once again fixed in her earlier expression. “No. I can do it!”

“Okay. If you say so,” he chuckled as he slightly shook his head.

“Hey, kid. You ready to go?” Chuck asked as he bent down taking over for Hannah.

“I said I can do it, Daddy!” Hannah huffed.

“I know, sweetie. I don’t want Castiel to be late for work. Is it okay if we try again later?”

She thought about it for a second before she made her decision and softened her expression. “Okay, Daddy.”

Chuck smiled and finished tying her shoes for her. He turned to Castiel, who had been standing there watching the exchange.

“You ready to go?” he asked.

He had already grabbed a pop tart and water while he watched the little disagreement they were having. “Ready as I’ll ever be,” he confessed as he plastered a fake grin on his face.

“Okay,” he said while grabbing his keys. “Let’s go.”

The ride to the library was spent listening to Kidz Bop. A rendition of Katy Perry’s latest was playing. Hannah was singing and dancing along to it in her car seat. Castiel watched her little body sway to the lyrics. He couldn’t help but smile at her motioning putting “another one in the basket”. Once the song was done, he looked out the window and smiled.  _I love that kid._

He could feel his father’s eyes on him the entire ride to the library. At this point, he was pretty sure his mom had already informed his dad what had been going on the past four days.  _I don’t want to deal with this right now._

They pulled into the parking lot at 8:55, five minutes before his shift was due to start. He unbuckled himself and turned to Chuck to say goodbye. He could tell that he wanted to say something to him. He pleaded with his eyes for him to drop it for now.

“You said to pick you up at 1:10, right?”

Castiel’s body loosened as he let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding. “Yeah. Thanks, Dad”

“Have a good day at work, kid.”

“I’ll try,” he chuckled softly. “Bye, Dad.”

“Bye.”

He closed the passenger door behind him and opened the door to the back seat to give Hannah a hug before he went into the library. “I’ll see you later.”

“Okay.” She hugged him tightly then gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

When he got to the library doors, he hit the doorbell so Joshua would know he was there. When he heard the automatic locks click, he waved back at his father’s car and entered the building.

Castiel’s day went simply enough. By noon, he had gone through at least half of the CDs. The main reason Joshua had given this task to Castiel was because of his attention to detail. Castiel knew that his need for order was bordering on obsessive, but no one complained. So, he figured why change? Plus, he was enjoying the monotony of his task and was excited to take home the pile of CDs that were on the top of one of the cabinets.

He felt someone tap him on the shoulder.

“Hey, Castiel! Told ya I basically live here.”

He couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face. “Hey, Sam! I don’t recall telling you that you were lying. Did you just get here?”

“Yeah, uh... Dean brought me,” He put a few stray strands of his mop of hair behind his ear in an obvious nervous gesture.

“Oh.” Castiel’s face fell.

“Yeah. I told him… well, it doesn’t matter.  He’s over in the DVD and BluRay section right now.”

“Okay.”

It was obvious that Sam noticed Castiel’s complete lack of elation at the prospect of possibly seeing Dean. He gave Castiel a small smile, trying to brighten his mood. “So, anyway, I thought I would say hi. I saw you standing over here and thought I’d let you know that I’m here.”

“Well, I’m definitely happy that **you’re** here.”

Sam gave him a pained expression in an attempt to show empathy for the situation. “I better make my selection before the library closes. Later, Castiel.”

“Bye, Sam.” He watched him go to the fiction section to choose another book. He then turned back to the CDs to continue with his task.

He could feel Dean’s eyes on him. He knew it was only a matter of time before he would walk over to him. Within seconds, Dean was there.

“That’s quite a selection you have there.”

Castiel bowed his head over the CDs. _I knew it..._

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean spent an unhealthy amount of time getting ready to go to the library.  _You’ve got one shot to make this right. Don’t fuck it up._

There was a knocking on his bedroom door. “Dean? The library closes at one. You know that, right?” Sam’s annoyance was palpable in the timbre of his voice.

“I’m fully aware of that, Sam,” he grumbled as he rolled his eyes.

“Then hurry the fuck up!”

He played with his hair for another minute before he decided that he was ready over twenty minutes ago. He knew he was only delaying the inevitable because he was being a chicken shit.  _Stop freaking out. Just be honest with him!_ He rubbed his sweaty palms on the thighs of his jeans and exited his bedroom.

Sam was sitting on the couch, glaring at him. “Well, it’s about fucking time, Dean!”

“Oh, shut up, bitch!” he spat.

“Jerk.”

He grabbed his keys and opened the front door. He turned to Sam who was just standing up. “After you, princess.”

“Oh, fuck you!”

They spent the drive in relative silence. Sam was pissed that he was going to have such a small amount a time at the library. He knew it truly was one of Sam’s favorite places in the area. He really couldn’t blame him. The place was kind of epic. The movie and music selections alone were incredible.

He parked in the largest lot to the right of the building and walked towards the monstrosity of a library with trepidation.  _Oh, God, what the fuck am I thinking? I can’t do this. The guy hates me. He’s not gonna care what I have to say._  He trailed behind Sam who was already on the sidewalk that led to the front doors of the library.

When he entered the library, he saw Cas’ standing over by one of the CD cabinets. Sam was already walking towards him to greet him. He observed the two of them as he made his way over to the movie shelves. He watched as the smile that lit up Cas’ face fell. _Sam probably just told him I’m here with him. Shit. That is far from promising._

Sam walked away from Cas and headed towards the enormous room that held the computers, periodicals, reference, and fiction section. _It’s now or never._

He nervously padded over to where Cas was standing. He glanced at the pile of CDs that were sitting at the top of the cabinet Cas was currently organizing.

“That’s quite a selection you have there.” He was far from surprised to discover that Castiel listened to a wide variety of music. He was also not surprised when Castiel’s head bowed in obvious frustration. He grabbed the pile that was on top of the cabinet. “What’s this? Chopin, Brahms, Miller, and Ozzy? You have eclectic taste.” He looked at the back of the Ozzy CD.  _I actually don’t think I have this one._

Castiel faced Dean. “What do you want?”

Dean took a good look at the man standing before him. Cas’ fury contorted his face, his sapphire glare boring a hole through whatever strength Dean had left. He fidgeted a bit underneath Cas’ scrutiny. The obvious display of dominance was kind of turning him on. _Fuck, he’s hot._  “I wanted to say hi. You look good.” He blushed before looking back down at the CD.  _Deep breaths. You are not off to a good start._

“You’re a schmuck. Leave me alone,” he growled.

The comment was a smack in the face. Instead of the comment further dampening his spirits, it infuriated him. “Why are you acting this way? I said sorry. I didn’t mean to be such an ass. I just don’t know how to act…”

Castiel cut him off once again, just like he had the day before in the music theory classroom. Unlike the day before, this time he didn’t even bother to turn around and look at Dean. “I thought I told you yesterday; I’m done. I don’t care anymore. Now, just go back to looking at the movies and leave me to my work.”

“Cas, please. I’m trying to…”

“Dean. Just stop. Drop it,” he snapped.

“I’m sorry,” he breathed.

“Whatever,” Castiel mumbled.

His heart fell into the pit of his stomach.  _At least I tried…_ He shook his head. _He wouldn’t even let me try to explain. I knew I would fuck this up._ He longingly looked at Cas for a few more moments before he decided to walk away.

He stood in front of the shelves once more, trying to find the western he had originally wanted. When he finally had the movie in hand, he turned to the left to look at Cas one more time. Castiel was staring at him with a wistful look in his eyes. He was about to smile at him until Castiel quickly ripped his gaze from his to look back at the CDs.

_Maybe… maybe I still have a chance to make things right?_

He took the DVD to the circulation desk to check out. Before he exited the building, he spared one more glance in Cas’ direction. His shoulders were slumped and he was shaking his head at the cabinet. He humbly submitted to the day's defeat and walked out to the Impala.

Sam finally made his way back to the car at 1:02. Dean had been sitting in the car for the last forty-five minutes, internally berating himself for the way he had handled Cas from the moment he met him.  _How can one person screw up this often? How is that even possible?_

Sam entered the car with a smile so wide he was almost glowing. “Find what you were looking for?”

“Actually? No, but this one works just fine,” He looked through the windshield as he buckled up with the same dopey smile.

“I have never seen one person get so excited about books.” Sam wasn’t even paying attention.  _That is not an “I’m happy I found a good book.” face. That’s a “There was a pretty girl in the library.” face._

Sam finally came down to earth. “What?”

Dean shook his head. “Nothing.”

He was just about to put the car into drive when he saw Cas exit the library and sit down on the bench that was out front.  _Why can’t I figure you out?_

“Are we leaving sometime today, Dean?” Sam asked, successfully pulling him out of his trance.

“Yeah. Sorry, Sammy. I was lost in thought.” He shook his head and turned on the Impala.

He could tell the exact moment Sam saw where his mind was because his face soured. “Lost in thought, huh?”

“Shut up.”

“Dean, I thought I told you to…”

He cut him off. “I am, Sammy. Okay? I just…”

Sam’s face softened. “Dean? What’s going on with you lately? Do you… Do you actually like him?”

Dean gave Sam a smile that far from met his eyes. “You said it yourself, Sam. I liked playing with the guy.”

“Dean, I don’t think you’re tell…”

“Drop it, Sam,” he growled. He glared at Sam who still wanted to argue.

He finally gave up and crossed his arms over his chest. “Whatever,” he said as he looked out of the passenger side window.

Dean put the car in drive. When he faced forward, he saw Cas climbing into the front seat of a 2017 Honda CR-V. He let the SUV pull out of the lot before him. He took his foot off the break and made his way back home so he could drop Sam off before he stopped at Bobby’s shop.

 

>>>>>>

 

**Zar: Hey, Cassie! Available for a chat? I know we promised tomorrow but I won’t be available. Can we video chat now?**

Castiel barged through the front door when he got home from work. He ran to his room and turned on his laptop. Luckily, it never took long for his computer to boot up. He went onto Facebook, selected his cousin’s face in messenger, and tapped on the video camera icon.

After a few rings, his cousin’s smiling face lit up his computer screen. “Cassie! Darling! How are you?”

“You know I hate that you have a cool accent. I have this lame Long Island accent. Yours is so prim and proper. Totally jealous.”

Balthazar appeared to be hardly amused. “Yes… fascinating.”

“I’m serious. I wish my dad moved to England like your mom did. I love the UK. You know that.”

“You’ve never even been here, Cassie.” He rolled his eyes in mock exasperation.

They played these little roles every time they spoke to one another. Neither would be satisfied until they got this bit of playful banter in. “Doesn’t matter! I still wish I lived there!”

“You live near New York City, the melting pot and one of the epicenters of the entire world, and you think that the UK is the best? You’re out of your bloody mind, Castiel.”

“Pftt! I go to the city all the time. I’ve never been to London.” He was starting to have a hard time keeping a straight face.

“Yes, but you see I live in London. So, it is far from interesting to me. Big Ben, Trafalgar Square, all old hat, darling.” His cousin was also starting to have a hard time upholding his half of the argument.

“You are so full of shit, Zar. You know that, right?”

“Oh, thoroughly full of it. I fucking love London. Fuck your New York City! I’ll gladly keep my London,” he laughed.

“Even though I still want to visit London someday, I will never trade it for the city. You better believe that.” He couldn’t help but join in on Balthazar’s fit of laughter.

“Well, enough of that. How are you, love?”

“You know. The usual. School started up again on Tuesday. Already missing summer vacation. How about you? How’s UCL?” Castiel was basically bouncing in his desk chair with excitement.

“Ugh, dismal. I detest that place.” Balthazar groaned, hardly containing his smile.

“You are so utterly filled with shit!”

Balthazar put a hand to his chest as in an attempt to feign offense. “Me? Full of shit? Whatever could you possibly mean? Me? Lie? Never.”

“Seriously, Zar. How’s University?” he sobered.

“Fantastic. I love it there, Cassie. If I’m lucky, maybe my dear uncle, your father, will hire me when I graduate.”

“He’d be lucky to have you, Zar. Maybe you can take my seat.”

Balthazar furrowed his eyebrows at Castiel. “Still not interested in the family business, are we?”

“I’m interested in a family business. Just not his…”

“Well, I know mum would be more than happy to have you at her side. You should think seriously about perhaps going to a university that would better suit that line of work. NYU for example. Stony Brook is more for eggheads, like your ass of a brother,” he scoffed. “How is the little shit?”

“He’s fine. You know him. And NYU is one of the schools I’ve considered. I just didn’t want to have to worry about room and board. I would rather stay close to home.”

“NYU is close to home, Cassie. A few subway stops and an hour train ride from Penn Station. Just promise me you’ll at least think about it, darling.”

“I will,” he mumbled. He couldn’t look up at the screen.

“Now how’s your girl, Charlie?” Balthazar wiggled his eyebrows at Castiel.

“You know she’s gay, right? You know I’m gay, right?” he asked.

“Oh, hush. I know. I know. I only say things like that because I enjoy getting a rise out of you. Especially after the sour face, you put on when we discussed colleges.”

“Uh-huh… well, Charlie’s great. She’s doing a lot of ‘LARPing’ which I still don’t get, but whatever makes her happy I guess,” he said with a shrug.

“I love that you still actually make the quotation marks rather than just implying it. It’s completely adorable. How are you still single? Someone has to have fallen for your blue eyes and quirky demeanor by now.”

The statement struck a nerve.  _No… but apparently, I have a thing for self-absorbed sociopaths._

“Cassie? Are you alright?”

He shook his head to clear it. “Yeah, I’m alright. And no. No one has fallen for me yet. Not since Aaron.”

“Cassie, sweetie, that was four years ago. You need to move on. Where’s your sense of adventure?”

“It has nothing to do with Aaron. He moved right after everything happened and I accepted that. Yeah, it hurt at first, but c’est la vie. I understood why his parents moved...” he trailed off a bit. The conversation was getting dangerously close to memories he would rather not bring up.

“Okay. Well, I just don’t want you to be hiding away. You should be having fun. Not just working all of the time,” he admonished.

“Hey! I do have fun!” he exclaimed.

“Are any of these said fun activities involved with work or school?” he asked.

“No…”

“Is that no a yes?”

“Maybe…”

“Castiel. You need to get out of the house for a reason other than school or work. What happened to your friend Meg? I’m sure she could find a way for you to have fun.”

He screwed up his face.  _That’s a terrible idea._ “No. Her idea of fun is a bottle of whiskey and an ounce of weed.”

“And?”

“I don’t really feel like being arrested, Zar."  _Is he seriously not getting this?_

“You’re lucky I still love you. Even though you still have that stick up your arse.”

“Zar! I do not have a stick up my ass!”

Balthazar chuckled. “Oh, uh, sorry. I forgot. You’re in denial.”

Castiel mimed looking at a watch that was never there. “Oh, geez, is that the time?”

“I’m only joking, Cassie. Lighten up.”

“Uh-huh… Sure. If you say so.” Castiel rolled his eyes.

“But you do make an excellent point. I do have other things that I should be doing but I didn’t want to cancel our chat for the second week in a row. Tata, darling. Talk soon!”

“It was great seeing you, Zar! Come visit soon!”

“Mum, dad, Michael, and I are planning on being there for Thanksgiving. So, only another two and a half months. Love you, Cassie!”

“Love you, too, Zar!”

His cousin waved one more time before he ended the video message. _Me, smoke weed and drink whiskey? Who the fuck did he think he was talking to?_ He snickered before he took out some of his textbooks to finish up some homework.

 

>>>>>>

 

“WHAT THE HELL?!?! ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?!?!”

Dean ran to the office where he could hear Bobby yelling. “What the fuck is going on in here?”

There was a mess all over the floor. Wet coffee grounds were on the table and floor. Filters were everywhere. The liquid that was a mix of sludge and actual coffee was seeping from the giant coffee machine they recently purchased. Worst of all, Bobby seemed to also be covered by said sludge-coffee mixture.

“I’m surrounded by a bunch of fucking morons! Whoever put the coffee in last neglected to put a filter in. So now, I’m dealing with this horseshit!” he snapped as he turned the machine off.

“Well, I’m not the moron who did it! Let me go grab the mop and bucket.”

Dean left the room and went to the utility closet that housed the cleaning fluids and other supplies. He filled the bucket with hot water and some of the industrial cleaner that Bobby stocked the shelves with. Once it was filled to his liking, he put some paper towel under his arm and steered the cart towards the office with the mop that was already in the bucket.

The floor and table were spotless in no time. Dean could tell that Bobby was breathing easier. “Better?”

“Yes. Bunch of fucking morons.”

“Are you okay? Did you get burned at all?” Dean asked with concern.

“No. I walked into this shit after I finished changing the spark plugs on the Forester out there,” he huffed. “ I was trying to clean up some of what was already on the floor when you got here. Don’t even know who to holler at about this mess.”

“It’s not the end of the world, Bobby.”

“Is there something you’re here for? Or did you just come here to sass me?” Bobby asked with a withering glare.

“You wanted me to go over the books with you? Remember?”

Bobby’s face cleared with realization. “Oh, yeah. Sorry, son.”

“No need to apologize, Bobby. I’d be pissed about that, too. Maybe I should make a little diagram about how to make the coffee and put it on the wall that way this doesn’t happen again. What do you think?” he added with an even tone.

“Sounds good to me,” he answered calmly.

After making a diagram for the coffee maker, which was pretty easy to use and self-explanatory, to begin with, Dean brought up excel and spreadsheets on the computer to go over numbers with Bobby. Even though Dean’s career path was leading him towards music education, he still was a part of this business and he loved it. Bobby opened the shop almost immediately after moving to Long Island with Sam and him. Dean had been working in the shop since he was sixteen. When he graduated from high school, he started taking on more responsibility when it came to managing the shop with Bobby. If Dean didn’t love music as much as he did, he would probably run the shop for Bobby. However, that wasn’t the case.

After hours of handling the books, Dean told Bobby it was time to call it a night and they closed up shop. When they got home, they ordered some pizza and pigged out on cheesy meaty goodness until they were ready to burst. Sam, the freak, ate a salad and didn’t even bother to grab a slice.

He and Bobby downed a few beers. Even though Dean wasn’t going to be twenty-one for another four months, Bobby didn’t care if he drank. As long as he was home and not out galavanting somewhere, he could honestly care less. They watched a bit of TV until Dean heard Bobby lightly snoring in his chair. Dean grabbed a blanket that was hanging on the couch and gently threw it over Bobby. He lowered the volume on the TV and turned off the lamp before he headed to his room.

He spent the rest of the night catching up on some school work and studying before he, too, decided to call it a night and turned off the light. The stress of the day seeped into his dreams and he spent most of the night in a twilight, seeking rest that wouldn’t come.

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel and Charlie spent most of the weekend together.

While Castiel was catching up on school work, he heard a knock on his bedroom door. He was pleased to see that it was Charlie when he told whoever was knocking to come in. They spent hours in his room talking about nothing. They watched a few movies while eating pizza from Mama Mia’s and shared a pint of Ben and Jerry’s for dessert.

He loved Charlie. She had always been there for him. Without saying a word, she had a tendency to make him feel like everything would be okay. Her presence was enough.

Charlie had already planned on staying the night, so when Castiel pulled out the air mattress it wasn’t a surprise. When the lights were off, and she was lying on the mattress they set up at the foot of his bed, she felt comfortable enough to bring up everything that had happened during the week. “What are you going to do on Monday? Are you going to say something to Principal Roman again?”

“No. That never helps. I’ll just continue to ignore them until it gets truly out of hand. I can’t let them get to me.”

“What if they try to start something again? Are you going to wait until things get as bad as they did last time?”

He could hear the concern in her questioning. “They will never have the chance to touch me like that again. I won’t let it happen. I’m not that scrawny ignorant kid anymore. You know that.”

“I know. I just worry about you. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I won’t.”

“What about Dean? What are you going to do about him?”

“I think after the way things went at the library, he’s finally starting to get the hint.”

“You know I love you, right?”

Castiel sat up and leaned over the edge of his bed so he could look at Charlie. “Of course I do! I love you, too.”

Charlie sat up and gave him a hug. “Just promise me something.”

“Anything,” he stated while hugging her back.

“Promise me you won’t be too brave. Promise me you’ll look after you.”

“I promise.”

“Good.”

They broke apart and crawled back into their beds before they both fell fast asleep.

The next day they went for a walk around the neighborhood. They played on one of the many swing sets at the elementary school around the corner from his house. They took the long way to the 7-11, across the street from the middle school, and stopped to get Slurpees and hot dogs.

By the time they got back to Castiel’s house, it was five pm and time for Charlie to go home. He gave her a quick hug before she got into her mom’s station wagon and they drove off.

Castiel spent a little time with his family before it was time to go to bed. He said goodnight to everyone and made his way downstairs to his room.

He set his alarm for the next day and decided tomorrow would be a better day.

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean’s Sunday was somewhat boring. He did some chores around the house and a bit more homework. He wanted to make sure he was ready for school the next day. Especially considering it was filled with classes. He only had a two-hour break the entire day. Between all four classes, he had a twelve hour day. Not including the two-hour break.

The practice with his band was the most fulfilling part of his weekend. They were able to run through a couple of sets before they shared some Chinese take-out. That night’s session reminded him of how everything used to be.  _Maybe things can get better. Maybe not everything is broken._

After everything was packed up and they said their goodbyes, Dean went into the house and took a quick shower. When he shut off the light and set his alarm, he tried not to let the wave of disappointment he felt about not seeing Cas the next day affect his chances of sleeping that night.  _A guy can hope, right?_  He stared at the ceiling for about twenty minutes and sighed.  _I’m not sleeping tonight again, am I?_  He wasn’t wrong…


	10. Chapter Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Over 30 kudos! That is more than I ever expected to get! I am eternally grateful! You're all part of the reason why I continue to write this story. So, thank you, again!  
> I am sooooo sorry that this chapter is short. But hey, the next chapter is going to be Homecoming! Woot woot!  
> As always, comments are welcome. I like hearing from all of you! Enjoy :)

“ _Goodbye stranger, it’s been nice. Hope you find your paradise. Tried to see your...”_

Even though Dean wasn’t going to be working at the high school on Mondays, Castiel knew that his day was going to be far from easy. He may not have to worry about Dean, but Alastair and his goons were another story altogether.

When he entered the school, head wet from the rain, his senses were on high alert. _Never again, assholes._ He may have taken necessary precautions to be able to defend and protect himself since the incident in eighth grade, but he was not going to give those jackasses a chance. He didn’t want it to get to that point.

He wandered over to the school store where Jo and Ash were already standing. During his walk over to them, he was constantly observing his surroundings. He didn’t think they would be stupid enough to try something in front of a group of people, but it was better to not test that theory.

Shortly after he joined Jo and Ash, Charlie ran over to him and wrapped her arms around him. “Well, good morning to you, too, Charlie,” he laughed.

“What? Can’t a girl be excited to see her bestie? What has the world come to?” she asked with an obnoxiously cheerful smile.

“Well, can’t argue with that,” he hugged her again, a little tighter than before. “I’m happy to see you, too.”

“I believe the word I used was excited. But, you’re lucky I’ll settle for happy.” She shrugged after he released her from their hug.

Castiel laughed at Charlie’s antics and turned back towards Ash to continue their discussion about bees. Andy was the next person to join the bunch. He quickly changed the subject of conversation to argue that the effectiveness of medical marijuana on most common ailments is second to none. Castiel was far from arguing that Andy’s point was valid. He did, however, point out that Andy had ulterior motives for wanting marijuana legalized.

The first period was magnificent. He could tell that Sam was surprised by how jubilant Castiel was. However, he didn’t comment on it, so the morning went over smoothly.

At lunch, Castiel was finding it hard to not laugh at everything that was going on between his motley crew of friends. He was happy to see that Meg was warming up to Sam. Especially, when at one point Sam started to talk about how much he was enjoying AP Biology. His grin was close to maniacal when he discussed his next lab.

“Now get this, my teacher said if I can unravel the pig’s intestines without breaking it, I will get an A for the semester!” he announced with obvious excitement.

She turned to him, arching an eyebrow with curiosity and mild disgust. “You are some kind of freak, ya know that?”

The hysterical laughter that followed made his face hurt and stomach ache. It was definitely worth the pain.

Castiel still wasn’t comfortable with how close Ruby was trying to get to Sam, but he was hoping that Sam would at least try to heed everyone’s warning. _It’s not just me who has said something to you, Sam. For God sakes, listen!_

By the time the school day was over, Castiel was exiting the band room like he was walking on air. The day had gone far better than he could have hoped for. Inclement weather or not, he was happy to feel like things were slightly back to normal. He made his way to the front of the school and paused. Brady, Alastair, and Ramiel were standing near the entrance. After the extraordinary day he had, he didn’t want them to ruin it for him. Quickly, he turned around and made his way back to the music corridor.

He was more than a little happy to run into Sam who was in front of the orchestra room talking to the Bane twins. “Hey, Castiel!” Sam exclaimed. “What’s up?”

“Hello, guys. Can I talk to you for a second, Sam?”

“You can talk to me for more than a second. Two even,” he smiled. “Later!” Sam said to the Bane twins. They both waved at the twin and started to walk towards the entrance. “So, what’s up? What do you need to talk about?”

“To be honest, it’s not so much that I need to talk to you as much as I just need you to walk with me.”

Sam looked down at him with a questioning glance.

“You see those guys over there? The ones who are staring at me?” Castiel asked with a nod in the group's direction.

Sam nodded his head as a form of confirmation.

“Well, they have been giving me a really hard time lately and I would prefer to not be alone when I’m around them. You don’t mind, do you?”

“Of course, I don’t mind. What have they been doing? If you don’t mind me asking,” he inquired, looking down at Castiel with concern.

“They just enjoy taunting me and degrading me. It fills them with endless joy to make my life miserable. It has for years now. I hate to ask, but would you mind walking with me to the bus every day until I get my license in December? I’ll have a car by that point.”

“No offense, Castiel, but it sounds like they’ve done a lot more than just taunt and degrade you if you’re uncomfortable to walk alone in front of them.”

Castiel pleaded with his eyes for Sam to not push the subject.

Sam took a deep breath and sighed. “Regardless, I am more than happy to do that for you.”

“Thank you, Sam.”

“Don’t mention it. We gotta look out for each other, right?” he asked with a wink.

 _He got that from his brother,_ Castiel smiled. _But, at least he’s not a jerk._

Sam walked him to his bus and said goodbye before he made his way between the buses to where Castiel knew Dean was. He could sense him watching them. Before he entered his bus, there he was, staring, near the trunk of his Impala.

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean felt like driving a railroad spike through his skull by his two-hour break at 1:30. _I can’t wait to not be in school anymore._ He knew he still had a year and a half left for his undergraduate degree and then two years after that for his graduate degree. It felt like torture. He was tired of classes and homework. _If I’m lucky enough, maybe I’ll be famous before then and won’t have to deal with this bullshit anymore._

He took his time driving over to the high school. He didn’t want to crash his Baby because he was in a hurry to get to the school during inclement weather. _It definitely has nothing to do with me having the slightest chance of running into Cas,_ he scoffed. _Keep lying to yourself, buddy._

Dean filled up his tank at the Speedway that was right before the school and picked up some snacks and drinks to get him through the rest of his school day.

When he pulled into the parking lot he turned up the volume on his stereo and jammed for a bit until he heard the bell ring. It wasn’t raining as hard as it was earlier, so he felt comfortable opening the car door and standing outside near Baby’s trunk.

After a few minutes, Dean saw Sam walking next to Cas. Just the sight of Cas was enough to make the butterflies in his stomach swarm and his heart skip a beat. His breath hitched. _You’re so beautiful and you don’t even know it!_ Knowing that Cas wasn’t walking alone, especially after what happened with that dickhead, Al, made him feel at ease. The fact that it was Sam was definitely comforting. If something were to happen, Sam would be able to handle things. Although, he really hoped it wouldn’t come to that.

“What’s with the face?” Sam asked as he approached the Impala.

“You and Cas are getting pretty close, huh?” he mused.

“Yeah, is that a problem or something? He’s a great guy,” Sam snapped.

“I know,” he admitted without question or hesitation.

“I know? Are you having an aneurysm?” he asked, his mouth agape.

Dean looked back at Sam. “Shut up and get in the car, bitch.”

“Jerk.”


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, everyone! As promised this chapter is definitely longer than the last one. I felt like crap all week for how short chapter ten was. Eleven is the beginning of Homecoming! Please comment and enjoy.

Senior year was finally starting to go as he originally planned. As per usual, he was getting straight A’s in every class. He knew for a fact that one of those A’s was achieved because Sam was pulling his weight in automotive care.

Castiel had been spending most of the school weeks in September either practicing with the Marching Band or in the school library studying. Sometimes Meg and Charlie would join him. Most of the time it was Sam and his friend Kevin, who he did not realize would be graduating with him in June. “I skipped a couple grades,” he had told Castiel.

In fact, Castiel found most of his spare time at school was spent with Sam. He could honestly say Sam was quickly becoming one of his best friends. Unfortunately, Dean was still Sam’s brother, so their social interactions were usually kept primarily on school grounds. Which Sam understood, for obvious reasons.

Even though Castiel had tried to avoid Dean with every effort after their exchange at the public library, he still had to see him more often than he would like. Of course, he had no choice but to see Dean on his normal working days at the high school. However, it was curious how he found that he was seeing him on Monday when he would take Sam home from school. He’d see him Thursday mornings when Bobby would **suddenly** need a part from the shop. He also made a habit of being there for marching band practice on Thursday afternoons, when he most certainly did not have to be. The one thing that annoyed him most of all was when Dean would show up on Saturdays, while Castiel was working at the library. For some odd reason, Dean seemed to have a desperate need to pick up a movie from the library when he dropped Sam off. Every time.

Without fail, every time Dean would appear in one of these places, Castiel would catch Dean staring at him. Not that he was innocent in any way. He definitely wasn’t. Castiel was just as guilty of taking every chance to look at Dean when he assumed he wasn’t paying attention. _You’re just as bad as he is._

More than once, he found himself walking behind Dean in the hallway, marveling at the way his ass looked in his dress pants. Castiel had a weakness for a particular pair of gray slacks that would always lie dangerously low on Dean’s hips but hugged his ass perfectly. After seeing Dean in them the first time, he had a particularly steamy wet dream about him later that night. It started out with the two of them kissing passionately up against the stage in the auditorium. Castiel was tightly squeezing Dean’s ass as they rutted up against each other. Swallowing each other’s moans with a deeper kiss. Until, eventually, he ripped said pants off of Dean and fucked him into oblivion over the piano in front of the stage. All while Dean stroked himself to completion, screaming Castiel’s name as he painted the floor with his cum. Castiel took a cold shower that morning, on purpose.

Unfortunately, the dreams and marveling had caused quite a few mortifying situations to occur. The worst was about two weeks after Dean and Castiel’s quarrel. Castiel and Alfie were leaving AP Literature and heading to their next class. They both had classes in the music corridor during the fifth period, so it only made sense for them to walk to their next classes together. Alfie brought up the subject. Castiel was just merely agreeing. Maybe he was a little too boisterous about the subject, but his ass was indeed gorgeous. As fate would have it, Dean was behind him during most of their conversation, listening to him go on a two-minute oration about how sinful Dean looked in said pair of gray slacks.

Of course, he only discovered that Dean was indeed behind him when he opened the door to hold it for the next person to enter, and there was Dean with a lascivious grin plastered on his face.

“Thanks, Cas,” he said with a wink.

Castiel could feel all of his blood rush to his cheeks. _Fuck!_

Dean was certainly pleased to know that Castiel was still adamantly and blatantly attracted to Dean. _Still doesn’t change anything. You’re still a schmuck._

The final week of September was spirit week at the high school. The entire school was decked out in red and white. The school mascot, the T-Bird, was displayed on banners in every hallway.

Castiel was always nervous about Homecoming. It was the first time the band would march together and perform their routine in front of an audience greater than a few teachers. Not to mention, he never enjoyed sitting and watching an entire game of football. Meg can try all she wants to explain to him how football works. He never cared enough to remember a single word she would say. _Also, seeing those jackasses for a couple of hours is far from what I’d call a good time. Especially, after the bullshit, they pulled last Wednesday._

When the bell for the ninth period rang, on the day of the Homecoming game, Castiel made his way to the band room to get ready. Anna, as per usual, was already there with her hair in a low ponytail, assembling her oboe. When she saw him, she gave him a megawatt smile. “Castiel! Are you excited?” she asked with glee.

“You know me. I’m simply ecstatic! All of those people watching us. Not to mention that long walk up Seventh Street to the football field! Oh shit, and how could I forget?! I get to watch those insensitive pricks run up and down the field for the next few hours!” His words were drenched with sarcasm.

“My, aren’t we in a lovely mood today,” Anna chuckled.

Castiel turned towards Anna with a bitch face he knew would make Sam proud. _You have officially learned from the master. Of course, he would be proud._ The thought made him laugh.

Anna looked at him as if he had two heads. “You sure you’re okay?” she asked.

“Just nerves. I’ll be okay.”

“If you say so,” she said with a shrug.

Luckily, they were blessed with a beautiful day. _Silver lining… I guess._

Castiel and Anna waited outside for Charlie and Jo. They knew it wouldn’t be long before the two of them showed up. Within a minute, they finally appeared. Both of them nearly exploding with excitement. Each had their proper gear in hand. Jo, being the captain of the kickline team, had Pom Poms. Charlie was a member of both parts of the team, as all of the girls were, but she carried a flag for marching up Seventh Street.

“Are you guys ready to kick ass?” Charlie asked as she skipped over to Castiel and Anna.

“Completely. Super duper excited,” Castiel grumbled.

“I’m assuming he’s pulling the same shit he pulls before every football game?” Charlie knowingly asked Anna.

“How’d you guess?” she asked with the same level of sarcasm Castiel had been exuding earlier. Both Jo and Charlie rolled their eyes in response.

“Alright. That’s it. I need to chill out. I’m starting to affect those nearest and dearest to me,” Castiel announced. “Let’s start walking towards the meeting point at Feuereisen Avenue.” Castiel turned quickly and slammed into someone who grabbed both of his shoulders to steady them. “Jesus! I am so sor…” _Of course, it’s you. Why would it be anyone else on the fucking planet?_

When he finally looked up, he was met with piercing green eyes and a gentle smile. “It’s okay. I wasn’t watching where I was going either. Are you okay?”

 _Of course, you weren’t… Liar…_ Castiel shrugged both of Dean’s hands off of his shoulders and grimaced. He didn’t even bother responding to his question before he walked away. He did, however, make a comment to the three women who were walking with him. “It would have been nice for at least one of you to warn me that he was there! What am I supposed to be, clairvoyant or something?!” he asked while throwing his right hand in the air. He would have thrown up both but his left was holding his oboe.

“Well, that’s kinda hard, Castiel. Cause he always seems to be right there. Doesn’t he?” Anna responded with a question of her own.

“What?” Jo asked.

“He’s like always right there! I don’t know how he does it, but he is,” Anna replied.

“Can we drop the Dean talk, please? Just for one fucking day?!” Castiel exclaimed.

He did not fail to see all three of them mouth the word “ **wow** "  in unison as he stomped away.

_Fuck all three of you…_

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean would be lying if he said that he was handling Cas’ distance well. He completely understood his reasoning. To be honest, he couldn’t blame him. It still annoyed him that he couldn’t get Cas to listen to him. _All of this animosity would end if you would just hear me out._

Sam avoided talking about Cas, even though it was obvious how close they had become. It made him sick how jealous it made him. He hated that it wasn’t him making jokes outside of the cafeteria before the sixth period every other day. Dean would swoon every time he saw Cas laugh. Cas has this adorable gummy smile which made the corner of his eyes crinkle and his face light up like a firework every time something particularly funny was said.

He despised that he wasn’t the one showing Cas how to do minor vehicle repairs or services. He found himself imagining them working on a car together. In fact, he spent an unhealthy amount of time fantasizing about what it would be like to have their bodies brushing up against each other as they reach for the same part or tool. Their bodies covered with a thin layer of sweat. Oil painting Cas’ face and forearms. Later, they’d share a shower. Hands cascading over smooth skin as the hot water washed away the dirt and grime of the day. Their mouths crashing together in a deep and sensual kiss. Most of the time, after letting his mind wander that far into the gutter, he would have to excuse himself to go to the bathroom.

Worst of all, he downright abhorred that it wasn't him walking Cas to the bus every day after school. He knew how much of a demon Alastair could be. Dean could only assume his friends were the same as him, if not worse. Dean wanted to be able to protect Cas. He knew that Sam was extremely loyal and would do anything for family, blood or not. Still, he couldn’t help but feel like that was far from enough.

Any time he had the slightest chance to steal a moment or two with Cas, he took it. Dean wasn’t a stalker or anything, but he had Castiel’s schedule memorized. Not the classes part of it. He just happened to know where Cas was at certain times during the day and tried to be there when it was possible. He did have a job.

Walking behind Cas was always either torture or hysterical. It was torture having to watch him interact with others, share smiles and memories with his peers, but not him. Never with him. However, Dean lived for the hysterical moments. Of course, Castiel obviously would have no idea Dean was there. Cas had a tendency to say some pretty embarrassing shit. His favorite by far was Cas’ animated speech about how hot Dean’s ass looked in a pair of gray dress pants. Dean went to Macy’s that night and bought four more pairs. _I have to make sure I look my best… you know for work… not him or anything… plus, you know, doesn’t hurt to have one in every color._

The last week of September was particularly stressful for Dean. Not only did he have a paper due in his Adolescent Psychology class, it was also Homecoming. Dean didn’t realize how much work went was involved on the administrative end. He remembered the amount of time they spent practicing for the football season and Hofstra. Now, knowing what Rufus and Mick had to deal with when it came to Coach Adler, he did not envy them.

Coach Adler had a serious issue with them using the football field three times a week. One Wednesday when they were on the schedule to use the field until 3:15, the football team showed up at 2:45 and told them that the football team had the field and that they would have to leave. If looks could smite, Rufus, Mick, and Ellen would be dead. Of course, to avoid confrontation, the band and the girls left the field. He did, in fact, gain a huge amount of respect for Charlie when she belted out “Respect” by Aretha Franklin as they left the field. The rest of her team joined in at the chorus, banging their heavy flags on the track as they went. _Girl’s got a set of pipes on her._

Luckily, for some reason, Vice Principal Crowley had a soft spot for him. Dean went to his office that afternoon and explained what happened on the field. “Of course, I’ll talk to Zachariah this afternoon after the football team is done with practice. We all have a schedule to follow,” he gave Dean a wicked grin.

“Thanks, Vice Principal Crowley. I just know how you are about integrity,” Dean smiled back.

“Please, call me Crowley, Dean. I’ll take care of this for you, but you’re going to owe me one,” he said as he shook Dean’s hand. “Always a pleasure doing business with you, Dean. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a little hell to raise.” He straightened up his suit as he showed Dean out.

He was genuinely concerned as to what that “one” was. Everything comes with a price. _Great, now I feel dirty._

When the ninth period bell rang on the day of Homecoming, Dean was put in charge of getting the drumline ready. Mick and Rufus were already heading down Seventh Street to Feuereisen Avenue, so it was his job to pull the drumline’s heads out of their asses. _Just because our school has been known for our drum cadence for years, doesn’t mean these shitheads can horse around. We have a reputation to uphold._

After all of them were strapped up and heading out of the band room doors, Dean took a moment to seek out Cas. When he didn’t find him in the band room, he followed the drumline out to the parking lot. His spirits were lifted as soon as he saw the brown mess of sex hair standing next to the other redhead, which he now knew was Anna, over by the side door. _Probably waiting for Charlie and Jo._

He didn’t realize that his feet were carrying him towards Cas until he was close enough to hear him “...towards the meeting point at Feuereisen Avenue.”

Dean didn’t have enough time to back off before Cas turned around and walked right into him. He gripped Cas’ shoulders with both hands.“Jesus! I am so sor…” The amount of disdain that exuded out of those opalescent blue eyes when he saw it was Dean was soul-crushing.

He couldn’t help but notice how right it felt to have Cas in his hands. _Think of something to say quickly, dumbass._  “It’s okay. I wasn’t watching where I was going either. Are you okay?” _Smooth, moron. He definitely fell for that one…_

Cas shrugged both of Dean’s hands off his shoulders and stalked off, completely ignoring Dean’s inquiry. As he watched Cas walk towards Feuereisen Avenue, Dean heard him chastising his companions. “It would have been nice for at least one of you to warn me…” That’s all he heard before Cas was too far away to hear him.

_Why do I even bother? You’re fucking helpless..._

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel always found the walk down Seventh Street to be completely pointless. They didn’t play anything, they just marched. The drumline was the only part of the entire marching band that did anything.

When they finally reached Feuereisen Avenue, Mr. Davies, Mr. Turner, and Ms. Harvelle were starting to organize everyone into their proper order. _Not that it’s changed at all in the last three years._ The order had always been Kickline, Color Guard, drumline, and then the rest of the band. It had been that way since before he started attending the high school. _Well, at least I don’t have to deal with those dicks until we’re already in the stands._

Previous generations had an actual parade. A cadre of students with floats they had built, a king and a queen in a slow moving vehicle, a banner held by cheerleaders, the marching band, Kickline, Color Guard, and the football team themselves, all walking in tandem. There used to be a weekend-long carnival too. However, when budgets get cut, things like that get cut along with it. Now, they just had food stands assembled near the field with merchandising tables.

“Well, I will see you guys when we’re all in the stands,”  Jo sighed as she hugged both Anna and Castiel. “Unless, you know, I die from exhaustion.”

Charlie rolled her eyes. “You’re not going to die of exhaustion, Jo. You’re being overdramatic,” she scoffed.

“Hey,” she snapped as she pointed to Charlie, “you just have to hold a flag up straight and make sure you put your left foot down at the same time as everyone else! I,” she pointed at herself, “have to do a routine the entire way up the street!” Jo exclaimed.

Charlie was mimicking Jo and making snotty faces during Jo’s little rant.

“Don’t make faces like I can’t see you!” Jo punched Charlie in the arm.

“I was so n….”

Jo made her mouth into a thin line as she reared up her fist for another punch.

“Geez, I’m sorry,” Charlie defended with a downward inflection when she said the word “sorry”.

Jo narrowed her eyes at Charlie. “Don’t say ‘sorry’ like that. You’re not truly sorry when you say it like that,” she chastised.

“Awww… are the old married couple at it again?” A voice as smooth as silk and sickeningly sweet came from behind them.

“No one asked you, Ruby,” Jo growled.

“Ooo. Did I hit a mark or something?” Ruby asked with a bogus sweet smile, making her look just shy of devious.

“Shouldn’t you be riding a broom somewhere or something?” Anna inquired.

“Oh, sweet little angel, I wouldn’t dream of being anywhere else,” Ruby chuckled as she walked away. With her flag in her left hand, she raised her right in a wave to all of them as she swayed her hips to the front of the parade.

“It’s still illegal to kill people, right?” Charlie asked with abhorrence.

“Yes. Unfortunately.” Castiel answered.

“That bitch is a raging cunt!” Jo grumbled.

Charlie’s eyes widened in shock. “JO! Language! What the fuck?!”

“I’m gonna have to agree with Jo, Charlie. She really is.” Anna stated.

“Yeah, but do we have to use the ‘C’ word?” Charlie asked as she cringed.

Castiel chortled. “Oh, my God, are you eight?”

“I’m only saying, there are other words,” Charlie muttered bitterly.

“Fine!” Jo exclaimed as she threw her hands up. “She’s a depraved, insipid, cantankerous whore who deserves to be viciously tortured by someone with a very sharp knife! Preferably an O Tanto blade. Better?” she asked as she raised her eyebrows at Charlie and pursed her lips.

“I would have just gone with twat-waffle,” Anna suggested with a shrug.

Castiel barked out his laughter when he saw Jo and Charlie’s shocked expressions. “Oh, my God, I can’t! Your faces!” he guffawed as he wiped tears from his eyes.

Anna started to join in on the hysterics. Jo and Charlie quickly followed. Soon all of them were grasping at their stomachs from the strain of laughing too hard.

“JO! CHARLIE! TIME TO GO, GIRLS!” Ms. Harvelle hollered to get their attention.

“That’s our cue,” Charlie said to Jo.

“See ya in the stands,” Castiel mentioned as he hugged Charlie and Jo again.

Anna and Castiel walked over to the rest of the band and took their places in the lineup. Mr. Davies made his usual pre-march speech through the megaphone. It was filled with cliches like “We’re only as strong as our weakest marcher” or “we’re all in this together.” _Can we just start marching already?_

When he looked over at Anna, her expression mirrored his. _We’ve been doing this for three years. I think we get the point._

Almost as if Mr. Turner could hear what everyone was thinking, he decided to cut in. “Enough of this crap.” He snatched the megaphone out of Mr. Davies hands. “All right, everyone. Don’t screw up. Start marching with your left foot first. No chewing gum. If you have to speak, don’t. You got it!”

Mr. Davies was glaring at Mr. Turner. Ms. Harvelle was trying her best not to laugh. Dean didn’t even try to hide his amusement.

“That’s quite enough, Rufus,” Mr. Davies admonished.

“What? You were all wordy and English. I got the point across. Quick and easy,” Mr. Turner rebutted. He didn’t realize he was still speaking into the megaphone until Dean took it out of his hands.

Dean walked away shaking his head and grinning with amusement. Ms. Harvelle grabbed Dean’s arm and whispered something to him. His face sobered. Castiel furrowed his eyebrows and watched the exchange with adept attention. _What’s that face for?_ He observed the two of them for a while. Ms. Harvelle did all of the talking. Castiel was about to let it go and turn away until two pairs of eyes landed on him. Ms. Harvelle and Dean were both looking at him. _Shit! Were they talking about me?_

Dean continued to stare at Castiel with a knowing smile. That, if nothing else, answered the question for him. _Yup…_

Ms. Harvelle gave Dean a quick pat on the back. “You got that?” he heard her ask Dean.

“Yes, Ma’am.” Dean gave her a dashing smile.

Dean looked at Castiel and his smile only brightened. _What the hell just happened?_

Castiel was even more confused when Dean gave him a quick wink and a crooked grin. _I am so screwed… I was just starting to get over… No, you weren’t! Stop lying to yourself. You’re still hooked and the both of you now know it._

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean started walking not too long after the little display he and Castiel had made. _Pull your shit together, man! It’s obvious at this point that you’re just something pretty to look at. Nothing more._

Dean walked dragged his feet over to where Ellen and Rufus were standing when he got to Feuereisen Avenue. “Hey, Rufus. Obviously, you’ve seen the drumline by now.”

“I’m not blind, moron,” Rufus snapped.

Ellen smacked Rufus upside the head. “What is wrong with you, Rufus? Dean is just letting you know that he took care of what you asked him to do, ya shit.”

“What the hell, Ellen? Are you trying to teach these kids bad habits?” Rufus asked as he rubbed the back of his head.

She scowled at Rufus. “You act like a smartass, you deserve to get smacked, Rufus.”

“It’s okay, Ellen. I should have approached the situation differently,” Dean said with a shrug.

“No, Dean. Rufus is in a bad mood and is taking it out on you.” Ellen supplied.

“What happened?” Dean inquired.

“None of your business, that’s what!” Rufus retorted and stormed off.

Dean turned to Ellen. “What happened?”

“Usual field scheduling nonsense,” Ellen responded.

“I just spoke to Crowley. He said he’d get it straightened out.”

“Remember in your Junior year, when we had to practice in the backfield every day because the football team had the main field?” she asked.

“Yeah. Fucking sucked,” he said with a nod.

Ellen nodded in agreement. “Do you remember the reason **why** we stopped practicing on the backfield?”

“Yeah,” he confirmed with a nod. “There was a girl on your team who suffered a serious case of sunstroke and it took almost a half hour for a golf cart to get back there to bring her to the front. The ambulance couldn’t get to the field. Principal Roman agreed that it was a hazard having us practice out there.”

“Well, Coach Adler, basically convinced Vice Principal Crowley that as long as we have a golf cart out there, we shouldn’t have an issue.”

Dean’s jaw dropped. “And Crowley thought that was reasonable?”

“Apparently, from what Rufus and Mick told me. That’s why you were put in charge of things before the ninth period. They were having a meeting.”

“Are you fucking serious!?  Crowley swore he would talk to Coach Adler! He told me he would help us!” Dean fumed.

“Crowley is a businessman. Unfortunately, it’s good business to make the football team happy right now,” she noted with a shrug

“Where is Principal Roman in all of this?” Dean asked as he balled his fists.

“He put Crowley in charge of this situation. Plus, he’s been in board meetings about increasing the school’s budget all week. So, he doesn’t want to deal something as trivial as this.”

“Horseshit!”

“I agree,” she put her hand on Dean’s shoulder. “Crowley may preach integrity, but at the end of the day, Crowley is all about Crowley. Sorry, sweetie,” She rubbed soothing circles onto his back and then walked away to her team.

Dean crossed his arms over his chest. _Fucking prick! I should have known he was being too nice._ He turned away from where Ellen was standing with her team and observed at the students surrounding him. Dean remembered being one of them. Excited to be out of class, but dreading the walk down Seventh Street.  It was pointless, really. They walked all the way down to Feuereisen Avenue just to walk all the way back to the school. _There is literally no fucking reason to do this._

His gaze did eventually land on Castiel. _You know as well as I do that you were looking for him._ Dean internally rolled his eyes at himself. _Shut up! I know._

Castiel, Anna, Charlie, and Jo were all glaring at Ruby as she sashayed away from them with a wave. _Geez, and I thought he hated me._

He decided to watch the four of them for a bit.  Apparently, Jo said something that Charlie found appalling. Anna and Castiel seemed to have sided with Jo. Of course, Jo insistently declared something else to try and silence Charlie. Anna shrugged supplying what he could only have assumed was her own opinion. Whatever Anna said caused Jo and Charlie’s jaws to drop in utter shock. Then Cas lost it. His face lit up with the gummy smile Dean was starting to adore and his entire body was shaking. Anna was the first to join in on the laughter. Jo and Charlie followed soon after.

Dean couldn’t help but smile at the entire interaction. _I wish…_

“JO! CHARLIE! TIME TO GO, GIRLS!” Ellen’s yelling stirred him out of his reverie.

He watched the group exchange hugs before they went their separate ways. Charlie was the first to see Dean. She looked him over as she narrowed her eyes at him. After a moment or two of being scrutinized by her gaze, she rolled her eyes at Dean and strolled over to one of the other girls on the color guard. _Yeah, I get it. You hate me._

Jo gave him a small smile when she noticed him standing there. “Shouldn’t you be over there, with the band?”

“What was so funny?” Dean asked ignoring her question.

“What?”

“What was so funny? Ca… You guys were laughing pretty hard over there. What was so funny?” _Close one, dickbag. You almost said Cas…_

Jo gave him a knowing smile.

_Fuck… She noticed._

“Yeah **we** were laughing pretty hard, weren’t **we**?” She raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms over her chest. “Lurk much, by the way? Were you watching **us**?” she asked with a little too much emphasis on the “us.”

“Nevermind.” He turned to walk away.

“You know, he realizes you’ve been following him?”

All the color drained from his face. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he retorted as he turned to look back at her.

“Right, of course, you don’t.” She shook her head and made her way over to her team. When she stood next to Dean she paused. “Whenever you decide to stop lying to yourself, let me know.”

Ellen gave Jo a questioning glance as she approached the team. Jo responded with a “later” glare.

_Ugh, I’m gonna be talked to later. Aren’t I?_

After everyone was done lining up, Mick got in front of all of them and started his usual spiel. Oh, my God! He STILL says the same shit every ** _time_** _?! You poor kids._

Dean regarded Rufus. If he thought the man was in a bad mood before, this one could only be described as abysmal. _He’s gonna tear someone’s head off._

“Enough of this crap,” Rufus grunted as he grabbed the megaphone out of Mick’s hand.

_Oh fuck… this isn’t good._

“All right, everyone. Don’t screw up. Start marching with your left foot first. No chewing gum. If you have to speak, don’t. You got it!”

Mick was glaring at Rufus. _It wasn’t good, but it was hilarious._ Ellen was trying her best to contain her laughter next to him. _Fuck containment! Why didn’t he do that when I went to school here?!_

Mick grimaced at Rufus. “That’s quite enough, Rufus.”

Rufus didn’t realize he still had the megaphone on as he began to speak to Mick. “What? You were all wordy and English. I got the point across. Quick and easy.”

Dean went up to Rufus and took the megaphone out of his hands. _That was awesome!_ He knew he had a goofy grin on his face but he couldn’t help it.

“Dean, we need to talk,” Ellen whispered to him as she gripped his arm.

_Here we fucking go._

“Look, Jo doesn’t have to tell me shit for me to know what’s going on. I got eyes. I’ve seen the way you been looking at that boy for almost a month now. The past three weeks you’ve been looking at him like a lovesick puppy.”

 _I’m not a lovesick puppy…_ he scowled.

“Don’t give me that shit! I remember you in high school.”

Dean gave her a quick glare.

“Not even close to where I was going with this, kid. I never saw you look at any of them the way you’ve been looking at him.” She peered over in the direction of where Dean knew Cas was standing. His eyes followed.

He was met by startled blue eyes. _Was he watching me?_

“I know you, Dean. You don’t look at people you don’t care about like that. I just want to warn you. Castiel has fought his way out of hell more than once. Don’t hurt him. I may love you, but they won’t find your body if he gets hurt.”

Dean smiled. _What is she? His mom?_ He smiled at Castiel, whose eyes widened.

“I’ve seen the way he looks at you, too. All I can say is be careful. You still have a job to do here.” She released his arm and patted him on the back. “You got that?” she asked, back to her regular volume.

“Yes, Ma’am.” _I most certainly do._

Cas looked at him in utter bewilderment. Dean simply winked at Cas as a form of answering him. _I’ll tell you later…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, um, thought I'd share this tidbit of information with all of you. The whole pants situation at the beginning of this chapter, it actually happened to me. I got a little carried away, not gonna lie. I didn't realize my insanely sexy math teacher was behind me the entire time I was raving about how incredible his ass looked in those friggin pants. My heart stopped when I realized it was him behind me. From what I could tell, I was blushing so hard I probably looked like a tomato, too. As I held the door open for him, he did exactly what Dean did to Cas. Again three years of my life being teased by that sexy mofo. Lmao


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost 550 hits!!!! *Insert Sally Field's Oscar acceptance speech here* Lol  
> So, this fic is going to be a monstrosity. I have over 175k words typed so far and I'm not even a third of the way done with their story.  
> I really hope you're all enjoying the fic so far. PLEASE comment! I love hearing from you! I do a happy dance every time I see one. It gets awkward for onlookers, but screw them. Lol  
> Now, without further ado, Chapter Twelve :)

_I **am** the_ ****_weakest marcher… Why the hell did he have to wink at me? Now, I’m all discombobulated…_

The entire walk to the football field was a blur. Castiel spent most of it in a haze. He was pretty sure he saw his mom during his journey up the street, but he was too busy thinking about what had just happened with Dean to truly pay attention.

After the band finished playing “The Star-Spangled Banner” and the Show Choir finished singing the “National Anthem” out on the field, the band took their seats at the bleachers. _How did I just do any of that? Are we sitting now?_

Anna was the one who snapped him out of it by literally snapping her fingers in front of his face. “Hello?! Castiel?! Where the hell are you?!”

“Sorry, Anna. I was distracted.” He took off his hat and put it between his feet on the bleacher.

“I can see that.” Anna searched his face. “Oh, God. It’s about him, isn’t it?” she asked with a scowl.

“Why does everyone always assume it’s about him?” he snapped.

“Why are you being defensive if it’s not?”

 _Touché._ “Fine. Yes. It’s about him,” Castiel conceded.

“What did he do now?” she asked as she raised an eyebrow at him.

“Ms. Harvelle and Dean were talking about me.” He looked down at his hat, trying to avoid her eyes. “And before you ask ‘how do you know?’ I know because they both looked at me while they were talking and then Dean smiled and winked at me.” When he finally looked up, her eyes were wide and her jaw had dropped. “Yeah, I know.”

“Why would she talk about you to him?” she asked, her voice an octave higher than usual.

 _How the hell should I know?_ “No idea.”

Charlie plopped down next to him after a minute or two of Anna and Castiel sitting in silence. “Hey, Bestie!” She looked between Anna and Castiel and laughed. “I know, football sucks. Am I right?”

“Why would Ms. Harvelle talk about me to Dean?” Castiel asked as he turned to look at Charlie.

“How do you kn…”

Anna cut her question off. “Trust me. He knows.”

“I don’t know. Ask Jo when she finally gets her ass over here.” She scowled as she leaned a bit to her left, looking past their bleachers.

“Why would **she** know?” Castiel asked.

“Um… I don’t know. Maybe because Ms. Harvelle is her mom and Dean is basically her step-brother,” Charlie replied with clear exasperation.

“Somebody talking about me or something? I heard Harvelle,” Jo raised her eyebrows at everyone with the question.

“Why would your mom talk to Dean about Castiel?” Charlie questioned Jo.

“How would I know? I said something to Dean about being a creeper. Maybe she reiterated. Why?” she asked as she took a seat next to Charlie.

“Your mom and Dean were talking about me. From what I saw, she was not reprimanding him, she was encouraging him,” Castiel replied.

“Ugh, let me go talk to her. See what happened.” Jo went to stand up but Castiel gripped her arm.

“Don’t bother. It’s not worth it,” he pleaded. “I have a feeling I’ll find out what it means sometime today or tomorrow. If not, then definitely by Monday.”

Jo shrugged. “If you say so.”

The first half of the game was spent cheering and alternating between playing “Charge” and “Hey Baby”. _They’re absolute shit. I don’t understand why they deserve any of this._ Ten minutes before halftime, Mr. Davies and Mr. Turner told them it was time to line up at the field’s right end zone. Castiel was already aching to get it over with. _You freak out every year. Every year!_ He switched his oboe from one hand to the other as he shook out his jitters from each one. He took his time walking down the track towards the end zone. He needed the time to give himself his normal internal pep-talk. _You got this! Four songs and its over._

“Awww, is the little angel gonna play us a song?”

 _Not right now! Please! Seriously?_ Castiel turned and glared at Alastair.

“What’s wrong? You don’t want us to hear you play?” He elbowed Brady in jest to get him to join in on the taunting.

“I don’t know, Al. I think he’s too afwaid to play for us,” he jeered.

“Knock it off you two! I won’t ask twice!”

_What the fuck?!_

“Ah, Dean. I’m so sorry, Sheriff. I didn’t mean to upset your little faggot.”

Dean got right into Alastair’s face then pointed a finger at him. “You’re lucky we’re on school property, asshat!”

“Well, then I think it’s best for you to scamper off with your little darling over there. Isn’t it, Dean?” Alastair asked with a sneer.

“This is far from over, Alastair,” Dean growled.

“No. I presume it’s not,” Alastair chuckled.

Dean turned away from Alastair with seething hatred and rage in his eyes. His expression instantly softened when he saw Castiel’s face. He gently placed his hand on Castiel’s forearm. “You okay?”

“Yes. Um… wha...what was that about?” Castiel stuttered. _Cause that was all kinds of hot!_

“Prick just gets on my nerves. This isn’t the first time he’s pulled shit like that,” he snarled as he glanced over at Alastair. “But you’re okay. So that’s all that matters.” He sweetly smiled at Castiel and started to tenderly rub up and down his arm. Castiel shivered at the touch.  “Come on. I believe you have a few Beatles songs to play. And we both know how much you love them,” he stated as he hit him with a devilishly handsome grin.

Castiel tilted his head to the side. _How do you know that?_

Dean chuckled. “You have a never-ending array of Beatle shirts, man. Doesn’t take a genius to figure out that you love them.”

Castiel nodded his head. _Oh… right._ “Yeah. I do.”

“Okay. Come on.” Dean moved his hand from Castiel’s arm to his shoulder and lightly directed him towards the rest of the band. Dean left his hand on his shoulder until they got to Castiel’s spot on the line. He gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze before he hesitantly removed his hand from Castiel. “Well, break a leg and all that crap.” He gave Castiel a coy smile and walked away with his hands in his front pockets.

Castiel watched him walk away, mouth agape. He wasn’t sure what to say, think, or do. _What the actual fuck was that?_ When the halftime whistle blew, Castiel took one last look at Dean as he made his way to where he would be standing in front of the main bleachers. _Did he buy those pants in every color? Sweet Jesus, I’m fucked!_

Castiel turned to his left. Anna’s face mirrored his previous expression. He shrugged because he had no way of explaining what had just happened. _I don’t even know what just happened._ Mr. Turner blew his whistle signifying that it was time for them to start marching out onto the field. _Well, here goes nothing._

 

>>>>>>

 

“What the hell are you smiling about?” Rufus asked Dean as they watched the band perform the national anthem.

“Can’t a guy just be happy?” Dean asked with a wide grin.

“No,” Rufus deadpanned.

“Rufus, look. I know you’re ma…”

Rufus cut Dean off with a sharp poke to his chest. “Don’t talk to me about shit. ‘Cause you don’t know shit. You got that?”

Dean rubbed his chest. “Yeah. I got it. Won’t happen again.” _Fuck… that actually kinda hurt._

Rufus stomped off towards the side bleachers where the band would be sitting once they were done playing. “He’ll get over it, Dean, my boy.”

 _God, this guy is like a testicle with teeth._ “Well, I think he has a right to be upset, Coach Adler. Someone ended up in the hospital the last time we had to use that field. In fact, no one uses that field. What kind of deal did you have to make in order to get this field almost every day?” Dean asked as he glowered at Coach Adler.

“Well, you know… got a little of this, for a little of that. I just explained things from my point of view and he agreed,” he explained with a smug grin.

“So, in so many words, you lied,” Dean hissed.

“No. I would never lie. I just avoided certain truths to manipulate him,” he sneered.

Dean balled his fists. _Coach or not, I want to stab this guy in the face._ “Well, I guess you’re players are learning from the best.”

“Well, I don’t mean to toot my own horn or anything, but I am good,” he said with a shrug.

“You’re a sch….”

Ellen pulled Dean away by his arm before he could finish and started to push him the other way towards the bleachers. “Okay, Dean. Why don’t we go over here since they’re done playing?”

“Oh, leaving so soon? I wanted to hear what he had to say? I’m sure Principal Roman or Vice Principal Crowley would be delighted to hear what we have working for us,” Coach Adler jeered.

Ellen stopped pushing Dean away and turned towards Coach Adler. “Zachariah, I think you’ve done enough damage for one day. So, why don’t you do what you’re paid to do? Go help those boys out there win for once,” Ellen commented with a wicked grin.

Coach Adler’s face sobered and turned into a scowl.

“If memory serves, they haven’t won a game in what? A season and a half?” Ellen asked as she looked up with a perplexed expression. “Funny. Kinda makes it look like you can’t actually do your job.”

Coach Adler’s face started to turn a deep crimson as he pursed his lips and balled his fist.

 _She’s fucking awesome_ , Dean mused with a smile as he crossed his arms over his chest and watched the exchange.

“Now, I do recall that my girls and this marching band have been winning every year at Hofstra for the past, what is it now? Twenty-five years?” Ellen asked as she shook her head and tsked. “Hmm, maybe that’s why he gave you the field, hmm? He feels bad for how lousy you are at your job,” Ellen continued to shake her head. “Shame really. All that money they’re wasting on you and your band of losers. They should be paying for us to go to Disney World for, what is it now, the seventh time?”

 _Okay, if she doesn’t stop soon this guy is gonna explode._ “Alright, Ellen. Why don’t we go over to our reigning champions?” Dean asked as he put a hand on Ellen’s shoulder. “I think you’ve proved your point here.”

Ellen gave Coach Adler a tiny girlish wave. “Bye, sweetheart!” she chuckled.

Dean looked at Ellen and beamed as they walked towards the bleachers. “If Bobby doesn’t ask you to marry him, he’s a dumbass.”

“Well, you make sure you tell him that.” She patted him gently on the cheek.

“You better believe it!” he exclaimed.

“Hey, Dean!”

He heard Sam screaming at him from the main bleachers. “Hi, Sam!” he shouted with a wave. “What are you doing up there? Why don’t you come down here and hang out with the cool kids?”

Sam screwed up his face in disgust. “Did you seriously just say that?”

“Jo’s down here. Charlie, me, Cas… We’re all down here!” Dean hollered.

“Well, Kevin, Alicia, and Max are up here. So, I’m all good,” Sam yelled back as he smiled.

“Don’t be lame, Sam,” Jo shouted from behind him. “Bring them with you!”

“I’m not being lame. It’s been awhile since I’ve hung out with the three of them,” he hollered back.

“Whatever,” Jo flipped her ponytail and walked away.

“See you after?” Sam asked.

“Of course!” Dean replied and walked over to the stands. It was only when he got over to the bleachers he realized he was happy that Sam rejected his invitation. _Ruby…_ She was tossing her ponytail flirtatiously at some of the guys who were in marching band. _That girl is a rancid bitch._

Dean forgot how much he actually enjoyed being at a game. Not for the football, even though he enjoyed the sport itself, but for the energy. He missed how well the marching band conducted the energy of the game.

Mick and Rufus let everyone in the bleachers know when it was time to walk over to the field. Dean followed closely behind once everyone had cleared the bleachers to make sure they were lined up properly. Mick reiterated, again, how important it was that not one single person’s foot can pass the end zone line because if it happens at Hofstra they’ll be disqualified. _I know, Mick. I did attend this high school. Remember?_ Of course, he was smart enough to keep that comment to himself and followed the group down the track.

He was about halfway down the track when he saw Cas, balling his empty fist and glowering at Alastair.

_Fuck no!! I thought I already made my point perfectly fucking ****clear!_

“I don’t know, Al. I think he’s too afwaid to play for us,” the smug blonde haired dick jeered.

“Knock it off you two! I won’t ask twice!” Dean shouted.

Cas turned to him. His blue eyes wide, jaw dropped.

_Are you seriously surprised I would defend you? What the fuck did I do to you?_

“Ah, Dean. I’m so sorry, Sheriff. I didn’t mean to upset your little faggot,” Alastair sneered.

 _I fucking **hate** that word! _Dean got right into Alastair’s face and pointed a finger at him. “You’re lucky we’re on school property, asshat!”

“Well, then I think it’s best for you to scamper off with your little darling over there. Isn’t it, Dean?” Alastair asked, his gangly teeth bared in a malicious grin.

Dean gave Alastair a once over. _Not right now. Take care of him later._ “This is far from over, Alastair,” Dean growled.

Alastair chuckled. “No. I presume it’s not.”

Dean turned away from Alastair making a beeline for the marching band. _Who the hell does that prick think he is? I fucking hate myself forever… Cas._ He composed himself enough to make sure Cas was alright. He softly placed his hand on Cas’ forearm. “You okay?”

“Yes. Um… wha...what was that about?” Cas asked as he stuttered. His pupils were dilated. His face was slightly flushed and his breathing was noticeably erratic.

Dean’s heart started to race. _Shit… I did something right apparently,_ he smiled internally. _Might as well make sure I reiterate how I feel about that douchenozzle._ “Prick just gets on my nerves. This isn’t the first time he’s pulled shit like that,” he snarled as he glanced over at Alastair. _I really do fucking hate him. I hate myself more for once calling that asshole a friend…_  He turned back to Cas and he felt all of his anger leave him. “But you’re okay. So, that’s all that matters.” He smiled at Cas as he gently rubbed his hand up and down Cas’ arm. He felt Cas tremor at his touch. _Maybe if you tried explaining yourself after today, he’ll listen._ “Come on. I believe you have a few Beatles songs to play. And we both know how much you love them,” he added as he gave him a megawatt smile.

Castiel tilted his head to the side and furrowed his eyebrows with a puzzled expression.

Dean laughed. _Seriously, Man? Have you not seen your wardrobe? You were just wearing an ‘Abbey Road’ shirt on Wednesday… Not that I noticed or anything…_ “You have a never-ending array of Beatle shirts, man. Doesn’t take a genius to figure out that you love them.”

Castiel nodded his head in realization. “Yeah. I do.”

“Okay. Come on,” Dean moved his hand from Castiel’s arm to his shoulder and lightly directed him towards the rest of the band. Cas wasn’t tensing with Dean’s hand on him. If anything, he noticeably relaxed. Dean decided to leave his hand there the entire walk out to the end zone. When they made it over to Cas’ spot in the lineup, Dean gave Cas’ shoulder one final squeeze, as a form of encouragement, then forcibly removed his hand. _I don’t want to g… Shut up. He has to perform and you have to observe. Remember what you’re actually here for._ “Well, break a leg and all that crap.” He wasn’t sure whether the smile on his face was goofy or adorable. He assumed adorable and put his hands in his pockets as he walked away. He barely heard the halftime whistle blow.

By the time he made it over to where Mick was standing, baton in hand, Rufus blew their whistle. Dean sat back on the bench and watched the magic of all of their hard work bloom before them. _I love this part._ He smiled as the “true” winners stole the show, as usual.

 

>>>>>>

 

“You were all amazing!” Becky shouted as she wrapped her arms around Castiel.

“Incredible job, kiddo!” Chuck smiled at his son as he slapped him gently on the back.

“I want a hug!” Hannah hopped up and down by the gates exit as she waited for Castiel to pick her up and give her a hug. Castiel swooped her up in his arms and cackled as he spun her around and squeezed her tight. “Faster, Castiel! Faster!” she squealed with glee.

“Don’t spin her around too much, bro. She’ll lose the hotdog she ate all over your uniform,” Gabriel warned.

After Castiel handed his oboe and his hat off to Gabriel, he lifted Hannah up and put her on his shoulder. “You wouldn’t do that, Hannah, would you?” he asked as she smiled down at him.

She held onto his right ear and giggled. “No, Castiel. I would never do that to you. I love you!”

“Oh, I see how it is. You won’t lose your hotdog all over Castiel. But it’s perfectly fine to projectile vomit all over me and Kali in the living room,” Gabriel whined.

“I was sick. My tummy hurt. I didn’t mean to,” she pouted and started to sob.

“No, Hannah. Don’t cry. I’m sorry. I was being a poop.” Gabriel handed off Castiel’s things to his mom and reached up to grab Hannah. She willingly raised up her arms to be taken off of Castiel’s shoulders so Gabriel could give her a hug.

Castiel gratefully accepted his instruments back from his mom and told her he would meet them over by the band room. He gave his mom and dad a quick hug and walked towards the back entrance to the school. Gabriel had already walked off with Hannah who was crying into his shoulder.

Dean was waiting by the doors for him. “Hey, Cas. Can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Why?” Castiel raised an eyebrow at him as he walked through the opening and made his way through the trophy hallway.

“Well, I just wanted to tell you that… Well, Al… He’s a dick,” Dean stammered.

“Yes. I am thoroughly aware of that,” he laughed. “What about it?”

“Um… well, I wanted to tell you that you hopefully won’t have to deal with him anymore.” He gave him another coy smile.

Castiel turned towards Dean and tilted his head. “Oh, and why is that?”

“I told him to fuck off,” Dean stated with a shrug.

Castiel froze in front of the Guidance Counselor's office. “You did what?”

Dean turned around and gave Castiel a wide grin. “I. Told. Him. To. Fuck. Off.”

“Why?” Castiel breathed.

“I don’t like the way he talks to you. Or treats you.” Dean looked down at his feet and put his hands in his pockets. “No one should be allowed to treat anyone that way. Least of all you.” He gave him a shy smile as he looked up just a bit through his indescribably long lashes. His cheeks were pink accentuating his freckles.

“Why would you do that for me?” Castiel asked as he narrowed his eyes at him.

“I think you know why…” Dean’s cheeks flushed a little deeper.

Castiel shook his head and looked down. _No, I really don’t. Do you like me or something?_ His eyes widened. _Do you_ **_like_ ** _me?_

Dean gave him one final smile. “Well… I’ll see you later, Cas.”

Castiel didn’t know what else to say. His brain had ceased to function. “Goodnight, Dean.”

Dean turned towards the front of the school and went out the main doors.

 _What the_ **_hell_ ** _just happened?!_

 

>>>>>>

 

After the game ended, Dean followed Alastair towards the school. _I told you, this isn’t over._ He made sure no one saw him as he dragged Alastair behind one of the dumpsters.

“Just because your little fairy would be okay with this, doesn’t mean I am, Dean,” Alastair hissed.

“I thought we took care of this over three weeks ago, Al,” Dean bit back.

“Since when do you have any control over what I can and cannot do?” Alastair asked with a sickening grin.

Dean glowered at Alastair. “I think you’re forgetting who I am, Al.”

“Oh, yeah? And who is that?” Alastair questioned.

Dean slammed Alastair up against the wall. He pushed his forearm hard against Alastair’s windpipe, cutting off his oxygen. “I’m the one who knows where your stash is. I’m the one who knows who your suppliers are. I’m the one who will make your life a living hell. You don’t like gay people, Al? Try being someone’s bitch in prison. I’m sure the boys in Riverhead would **love** you. Your uncle’s influence will only get you so far.”

“You wouldn’t do that,” Alastair spat as he narrowed his eyes at Dean, his hands clawing at Dean’s arms as he tried to fight him off.

Dean applied a little more pressure to Alastair’s neck and leaned in closer. “Watch me. Turning you in,” Dean chuckled, “would be a privilege and pleasure. So, I won’t say this again, Al. Fuck off!” He released Alastair from the wall and backed off.

“I can fuck you over too, Dean,” Alastair coughed as he rubbed his throat.

“I’d like to see you try,” Dean laughed.

Alastair’s face split into a malicious grin. “Oh, I will. Trust me, I will succeed. It’s not only your little princess that should worry, Dean. At least he knows his place. He learned his lesson the first time.”

Dean’s entire being lit up with a level of rage he didn’t know he possessed. “What the fuck does that mean?! What did you do to him?!”

Alastair’s grin grew wider. “Nothing a faggot like him doesn’t deserve.”

“What’s going on over here, boys?”

_Of course, you show up now…_

“Oh, nothing, Coach. Just having a little chat,” Alastair said as he winked at Coach Adler.

“All about good stuff, I hope?” Coach Adler asked he pointed his finger at both of them.

Dean plastered on a fake smile and spoke through his gritted teeth. “Yeah, of course.”

“Good! Al, why don’t you head to the locker room? We have a few things we need to go over before I let you go tonight.” Coach Adler motioned his hand to have Alastair come with him.

“Of course, Coach!” Alastair walked away and flipped Dean off, behind his back, as he turned the corner.

_What the fuck did that monster do to him?_

Dean knew where Cas would be heading. He walked over to the trophy hallway and stood outside the entrance to the school. _Alastair isn’t stupid enough to try to pull something after that. I have him by the nuts._ When he saw Cas walk away from a cute couple, which he assumed were his parents, all thoughts of Alastair’s warning flew out of his head. _He can’t do anything to us._

Cas narrowed his eyes as he got closer to the entrance to the school.

 _I’m not going to hurt you…_  “Hey, Cas. Can I talk to you for a minute?”

Castiel raised an eyebrow at him as he walked through the opening and made his way through the trophy hallway. “Why?”

“Well, I just wanted to tell you that… Well, Al… He’s a dick,” Dean stammered. _No shit, Sherlock._ He internally rolled his eyes.

“Yes. I am thoroughly aware of that,” he laughed. “What about it?”

Dean almost exploded when he saw a bit of Cas’ gummy smile. _It’s directed at me!_ “Um… well, I wanted to tell you that you hopefully won’t have to deal with him anymore.” _Stop being so goofy…_

Castiel turned towards Dean. He tilted his head and gave him the same adorable perplexed expression he used earlier.

_Seriously, man. You gotta stop that._

“Oh, and why is that?” Cas asked.

Dean shrugged. “I told him to fuck off.” _Well… actually… I said more than that but whatever._

Castiel froze in front of the Guidance Counselor's office. “You did what?”

Dean turned towards Cas and was floored by his dumbfounded expression. It quickly changed to amusement as he gave Castiel a wide grin. “I. Told. Him. To. Fuck. Off.”

“Why?” Castiel breathed.

“I don’t like the way he talks to you. Or treats you.” Dean looked down at his feet and put his hands in his pockets. _When did I turn into a thirteen-year-old girl? Maybe I should start having slumber parties? We’ll braid Sam’s hair..._ “No one should be allowed to treat anyone that way. Least of all you.”

“Why would you do that for me?” Castiel asked as he narrowed his eyes at him.

“I think you know why…” Dean felt his cheeks flush.

Castiel shook his head, then looked at the ground with a puzzled expression for a few moments.

_It can’t be that hard to figure out how much you mean…_

Dean saw the light bulb go off the instant Cas figured it out. His blue eyes grew incredibly wide and all of the color drained from his face as he swallowed hard.

Dean beamed at Cas’ realization. “Well… I’ll see you later, Cas.”

“Goodnight, Dean.”

For a moment, Dean was afraid that Cas had lost his ability to speak. _Wouldn’t be the first time I rendered someone speechless..._

He continued to smile as he walked out the front doors and made his way to the Impala. Sam was standing next to the rancid bitch that everyone was always **so** happy to see. “Hey, Dean. This is…”

“Ruby. Yes. I know,” Dean responded without letting Sam finish. He left his expression vacant. _It’s easier for her to think I’m indifferent towards her. Rather than the fact that I don’t like or know her._

“Oh? Has Sam been talking about me?” she asked as she twirled her hair, giving Sam a lascivious grin.

“Not just him actually. Quite a few people,” he answered, giving her his “little shit” grin.

Ruby’s face sobered. “Oh… All nice things I hope?” she asked adding a smile at the end.

“Depends on what you consider ‘nice’,” Dean replied. He raised her eyebrows and gave her a thin smile that clearly said: “Get the fuck away from my car now, bitch!”

She turned to Sam and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Don’t believe everything you hear.”

Sam’s face turned a rosy pink. “Bye, Ruby.”

“Later, Sam,” she cooed as she swayed her hips to a car nearby.

 _Don’t I know that car?_ Dean shrugged it off. “Get in the car, bitch.”

“You’re lucky she wasn’t here to hear it, jerk,” Sam grumbled.

“Yeah? And what would you have done?” Dean asked with an amused smile.

“Fuck you!” Sam got into the car and slammed the passenger door behind him.

_Yup… that’s what I thought._


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The number of hits this past week blew me away. Thank you! You have no idea how much it means to me that all of you are reading this fic! Please comment! I want to hear from you. I know I say it basically every week, but I really do want to hear from all of you!

On the Tuesday morning after Homecoming, Charlie narrowed her eyes at Castiel when she witnessed the painfully awkward interaction between Dean and Castiel after Dean exited the auditorium. “What the fuck was that about?”

Castiel tilted his head at her, feigning innocence. “What the fuck was what about?”

Charlie crossed her arms over her chest. “Don’t give me that, Shurley. I saw the level of red your face turned and I saw the doe-eyed grin that Dean just gave you. What the fuck was that about?”

“It was nothing. He just… I don’t know. He did me a favor.” He shrugged.

“And what favor was that?”

Castiel looked down at his feet and started to kick at nothing. “He told Alastair to fuck off and leave me alone,” he mumbled.

“He did what?!”

Castiel looked up from the floor into the wide-eyed expression of his best friend. “He told me that no one deserves to be talked to like that. Least of all me.”

Charlie’s eyebrows shot up and her eyes grew impossibly wider. “He…” She shook her head in confusion. “What?! How?! What?!”

Castiel chuckled at Charlie’s obvious surprise. _You and me both, Bradbury._ “Three excellent questions. None of which I have the answer to.”

“Why didn’t you text me about this, you ass?!” she asked as she punched him in the arm.

He grabbed his arm and started to rub it. “I didn’t think it was all that important,” he grimaced.

Charlie screwed up her face. “Didn’t think it was… Have you lost your fucking mind?! Of course, this is important!”

Castiel shook his head and furrowed his eyebrows. “No. He was just being nice. He saw how much of a dick Alastair is to me and did what anyone would do. You would have done the same thing.”

“I wouldn’t look at you like that after, that’s for sure.”

Castiel didn’t want to tell her about what else happened. About the fact that Dean basically admitted his feeling for Castiel after Homecoming. He didn’t want to get his own hopes up and watch them get crushed when it all turned out to be a game that Dean was most likely playing. However, if the way Dean was looking at him was any indication of how he was truly feeling, it certainly was not a game.

Charlie was the only friend who said anything about Dean and Castiel’s behavior. Even though it was pretty obvious that things were different. The most he got from Meg and Anna were mild sighs and eye rolls when they saw one of Dean and Castiel’s mortifying exchanges. He was definitely surprised that Sam stayed silent on the subject. He didn’t have to say anything, his facial expressions spoke volumes. His favorite by far was the Thursday after Homecoming when Dean showed up the first period with bagels and coffee. After he gave Castiel one of each, the sheer look of shock and horror at their mildly humiliating interaction was priceless.

What was truly disconcerting about the entire interaction was that Dean seemed to know the exact way, down to the amount of cream cheese, he took his bagel. _Only my mom and Gabriel know the way I take it. The last time I checked my mom and Dean have never met and Gabriel is far from a big fan of Dean._

Unfortunately, Gabriel had also become aware of Dean’s new nervous, yet flirtatious, behavior. Gabriel was in charge of being Charlie and Castiel’s ride after the next home game on the first Saturday of October. He was parked in the lot next to the tennis courts waiting for Charlie and Castiel. “Hey, Cassie. Ready to blow this dump?” Gabriel asked while wiggling his eyebrows.

“I’m pretty sure I have asked you an infinite amount of times not to call me that,” Castiel grumbled.

Gabriel placed his hand over his heart as if he were wounded by Castiel’s words. “I see how it is. Zar can call you Cassie but your own brother has to stick to Castiel? For shame, Castiel. For shame,” he said, acting as if he was truly choked up about the entire situation.

Charlie was laughing next to him during Gabriel’s performance. Castiel turned and glared at her. “Oh come on, Shurley. Your brother is hilarious. I can’t help myself.”

Gabriel gave the two of them a shit-eating grin. “I always knew I liked you, Red.”

“Can we just go?” Castiel whined.

“Cas!”

 _Oh, God, please no. Not now… Not while he’s here._ Castiel turned around and saw Dean running towards him. “Yes?”

When Dean finally reached him he was out of breath. “You forgot your hat.” He held out the standard marching band hat to Castiel, willing him to take it.

“No, I didn’t. See?” Castiel held up his identical hat.

“Oh… I saw it sitting where you usually sit on the bleachers and assumed it was yours.” Dean looked at the hat and pursed his lips.

“Maybe it’s Anna’s?” Charlie questioned.

Castiel shrugged. “Maybe.”

Dean looked up at Castiel and blushed, accenting all of his freckles.

 _I wonder how much of his body is covered in those freckles._ Castiel gave Dean a once-over before he internally slapped himself. _Get your mind out of the gutter, Shurley._

Dean seemed to notice and his face flushed a few shades deeper after he was also caught checking Castiel out.

“I hate to interrupt this mildly awkward encounter, but do we plan on leaving sometime today?” Gabriel asked as he stood by the driver side door, left hand turning white from how hard he was grabbing it.

_I forgot how much Gabriel despises him…_

Dean looked over at Gabriel and did a double take. “Hey! Don’t I know you?”

“Yes, unfortunately.” Gabriel rolled his eyes. “We have a mutual acquaintance.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed. “Really? Who? I’m sorry. I’m drawing a complete blank here.”

“Lydia.”

Dean mouthed the name as he looked up at the sky. It took her about fifteen seconds to remember who she was. “Oh, Lydia,” he said with a crooked grin. “Yeah, how has she been? Do you still talk to her?”

Gabriel narrowed his eyes at Dean. “You’re one heartless S.O.B., aren’t you?”

Dean’s face screwed up in bemusement. “Excuse me?”

“Look, bucko. I’m here to pick up my brother. Not shoot the shit with you. Okay?” Gabriel turned to his attention towards Castiel. “Are you ready to go?”

Castiel could feel the animosity oozing from the two men as he looked between them. “Uh, yeah.” Castiel placed a hand on Dean’s arm. Dean faced him and his expression instantly softened. _God, why are you touching him? Why did you touch him?_ “Thanks for… well trying to return a hat that’s not mine,” he chuckled.

Dean gave Castiel a megawatt smile and looked at where Castiel’s hand was. “It was nothing, Cas.”

Castiel hesitantly removed his hand from Dean’s arm, instantly regretting that he touched him, to begin with. _Great,_ _now you know what he feels like… shit._ “Well… I guess… Goodbye, Dean.”

“Later, Cas” Dean gave Castiel a random squeeze on his shoulder before he walked away towards his Impala.

Castiel joined everyone else in the car and sat in silence as he felt the temperature of the car drop a few degrees. “Don’t ask… I don’t even know,” Castiel said as he shook his head.

Gabriel glared at Castiel. “What part of 'stay away from him' did you not understand, Castiel?” he asked.

Castiel looked down at the hat that was sitting between his feet. “I… I’ve been trying… I…”

Charlie rose to his defense from the back seat. “It’s not his fault, Gabriel. Dean seems to have developed some sort of mild stalker-like crush on Castiel.”

Castiel looked out the windshield and snapped. “It’s not stalker-like!”

“Then what is it, Castiel?” Gabriel fired back.

“I don’t know… Can we just drop it?” Castiel asked with defeat as he looked back down at the hat.

Gabriel’s gaze continued to bore into the side of Castiel’s head. “Nothing good will come of you feeding into his random fixation. Did you see how long it took for him to remember Lydia?”

Castiel looked up at Gabriel and nodded.

Gabriel nodded along with Castiel. “Well, remember that. ‘Cause like it or not, little bro, you will become another one of his Lydias.”

“I got the hint…” Castiel looked down at his knotted fingers. “Can we go now?”

“Yeah, we can go.” Gabriel put the car in drive and exited the school parking lot.

_It’s going to be close to impossible to avoid him… Especially, since… well, since I don’t want to._

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean knew he was stupid for thinking things would be different right away. He wanted to make a move, but he could see how uncomfortable Cas was with everything. He was definitely happy that Cas was at least acknowledging him again.

The first day he was back at the high school, he planned to go right up to Cas after he finished playing in the auditorium. However, the second he saw Cas standing there with Charlie, Ash, and Jo, he froze. He had no idea what to say. He spent a few moments thinking. _Should I go up and talk to him or just acknowledge his presence and walk away?_

He ended up doing some sort of awkward one-two step until he settled on giving him a sweet smile. After that humiliating moment, he put his hands in his pockets and walked away. _You’re a fucking idiot._

That Thursday was just as embarrassing. He spent fifteen minutes looking at the menu board at Strathmore before he decided to get Cas an egg everything bagel with vegetable cream cheese. He was mortified when he got to the register and realized he didn’t know how Cas took his coffee, so he asked for a bag of creamers and every kind of sweetener to take with him. The same woman he has been ordering bagels from since he moved to Long Island gave him a knowing smile as he walked away. _I know… I’m fucking pathetic._

After he spent a few minutes banging on the shop doors of the high school, Bobby greeted him with a huge smile. “Hey, son! Whatcha got there?”

Dean shrugged. “Carbs, grease, and caffeine.”

“Well, bring them in here, ya idjit! Before they get cold,” Bobby ordered as he motioned for Dean to come in.

His entire world lit up when he saw Cas looking over the hood of the beater with Sam, a small amount of grease-painted his forehead. _How the hell did you do that?_ He laughed.

“What the hell are you laughing at?” Bobby questioned.

Dean cleared his throat. “Nothing.” He started to empty the bag from Strathmore. “I got you bacon, egg, and cheese on a bacon and egg bagel. Fruit salad for the hippie and I got… well, I got something for Cas, too.”

Bobby raised an eyebrow at Dean. “Uh-huh… Care to explain why?”

“Because I felt like it,” Dean mumbled.

“Sam, get over here!” Bobby yelled, effectively grabbing his attention. “Castiel, you, too.”

Sam and Cas’ eyes widened. Their expressions were close to cartoonish. Sam looked at Cas and pointed out the strip of oil on his forehead. Cas said something that looks a lot like the word “Fuck” and wiped a towel all over his face.

Sam laughed as he approached Dean and Bobby. “What’s up, Bobby?”

“I brought you some fruit salad, ya hippie.” Dean put a fork on top of the container and shoved it at Sam.

“You know, trying to be healthy is nothing to be ashamed of,” Sam huffed.

“Well, it certainly makes up for this sin of a coffee that you always order.” Dean handed over the cup of coffee he got for Sam. “Here’s your cream and sugar with a splash of coffee.”

Sam’s eyes smiled. “Thanks, Dean.” He leaned on Bobby’s desk as he took a sip and placed the fruit salad next to him. His eyes fluttered shut as he savored the flavor of his sacrilege coffee.

“You wanted to see me, Mr. Singer?” Castiel asked as he apprehensively approached Bobby.

“Actually, I did,” Dean answered sweetly.

Castiel tilted his head and furrowed his eyebrows at Dean. “Why?”

 _Fuck! I love when he does that! How can someone be adorable and sexy as fuck at the same time?!_ He laughed nervously. “I got you a bagel and coffee.” He handed him the bagel first. “I got you an egg everything bagel with vegetable cream cheese. I asked them to lightly shmeer it. They always overdo it.” He turned and grabbed the coffee and the bag filled with the coffee-fixings. “I didn’t know how you take your coffee, so I got a bag of creamers and sweetener.”

Cas’ slack-jawed expression was enough to make his day. “Um… I don’t usually drink coffee. I’m more of a tea person actually.”

Dean’s face sobered. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

Cas’ eyes locked on Dean’s in panic. “No! No, this is perfect. Thank you. You didn’t have to get me anything.”

Dean let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding. “I did it because I wanted to, Cas,” he admitted as he smiled bashfully at Cas.

Cas smiled with his eyes. “Well, it was extremely nice of you. I do drink coffee on occasion. I usually get it extra light.”

“Noted.”

“Dean?”

“Yeah, Cas?”

Cas gave him his favorite perplexed expression and head tilt. “How did you know the exact way that I take my bagel?”

 _Well, fuck._ “Extremely lucky guess,” he answered.

Castiel narrowed his eyes at Dean. “Uh-huh…” Castiel searched Dean’s face. He pursed his lips and huffed out a breath when he didn’t find what he was looking for. “Well, thank you again. I appreciate the gesture.”

“You’re welcome, Cas.”

Cas walked over to Bobby’s desk and fixed his coffee the way he likes it, then tossed the bag into the garbage. After one final smile at Dean, he turned towards the car he had been working on. He put the bagel into his backpack for later and his coffee on the workbench holding all of their tools.

When Dean turned to look at Bobby and Sam, Bobby was smiling and Sam maintained a horrified expression. “What?!” Dean whined.

Bobby crossed his arms over his chest as his smile widened. “Well, aren’t you adorable,” Bobby chuckled.

“Shut up!”

“What the hell was that, Dean?” Sam gasped. “That was… I don’t have words for what I just witnessed.”

Dean scoffed. “Says mister drools over Ruby every chance he gets.”

Sam left his fruit salad and coffee on Bobby’s desk, gave Dean the finger, and walked away.

Later that day Sam cornered Dean at home saying that his behavior was unacceptable. It was obvious how uncomfortable Cas was with the entire situation.

_Cas knows how I feel. I don’t need to be told how I should feel or what I should do from everyone._

He couldn’t help but feel like he was somewhat lying to Cas when Alastair’s behavior started to unnerve him once again. He wasn’t harassing him like before, but during the next home game, Alastair and the other football schmucks were either giving Castiel death looks or avoiding him altogether. Every so often, he would catch the smug blonde asshole whispering to Alastair about something as they were watching Cas. When Alastair saw Dean watching them, he gave Dean a wink and a smile. The unsettling expression made him paranoid about what could possibly happen. Especially, since Alastair mentioned that he had done something to hurt Cas in the past. Cas didn’t seem to notice, but he felt it was fairly obvious that Cas should not be left alone when he’s around one of Alastair’s posse.

After the football game, his new founded paranoia made him pull a rather ridiculous ploy. He saw the blonde dick, _I really gotta find out what his name is,_ walking within the same vicinity as Cas. He quickly grabbed one of the spare hats and ran over to him. Apparently, he did a pretty decent job of acting like he actually thought it was Cas’ hat because Charlie even suggested that it could be Anna’s. His major regret about the entire exchange, besides the whole humiliating himself yet again, was he found out that Cas’ brother hates him. Unfortunately, he was a friend of one of his exes. That relationship, in particular, did not end well. _Him hating me is gonna be a problem, isn’t it?_  

 

>>>>>>

 

As the weeks went by, October was becoming more and more hectic. Hofstra was fast approaching. They were due to perform on the third Thursday of the month and it honestly never felt like they had enough time to prepare. Castiel knew that they would do an outstanding job and bring the house down, but the anticipation of that night was killing everyone.

They were practicing four times a week. After the whole field debacle, they were given a golf cart on Mondays and Wednesdays to take to the backfield. Mr. Turner spent most of his drive to the field cursing under his breath. Castiel noticed that Mr. Turner favored one phrase in particular. “Fuck you, Zachariah. You junkless wheezing bag of dicks.”

Castiel hated walking to there. It was at least three-quarters of a mile away from the main building and because of the distance, they were only able to run through everything once with the Kickline and Color Guard team before they had to make it to their afternoon buses.

The first thing Castiel did when he finally made it to the field was a search for Dean. He was always there Tuesday through Thursday for practice. In the second week of October, he realized that he didn’t see Dean on Mondays like he used to. After Gabriel’s warning, he was trying to stay away from him. Still, he felt like he could at least wonder where he was. _Keep lying to yourself. It’s been working out perfectly so far._

Jo, of course, noticed his weak attempt at hiding his search for Dean that Monday. “He’s busy on Mondays.”

“What?”

Jo raised an eyebrow at Castiel as she dropped the bag of pom poms onto the side of the field. “Dean. He’s busy on Mondays. He scheduled all of his classes on Mondays so he wouldn’t have to worry about having to make it to other classes during the week.” She looked up as if lost in thought. “Well, all except for his, I think it’s sociology… maybe psychology?” she shook her head as if she was trying to clear it. “Whatever, he has a class on Thursdays, too.”

Castiel narrowed his eyes at Jo. “I wasn’t looking for Dean.”

Jo rolled her eyes. “Uh-huh… sure you weren’t.”

“I wasn’t!”

“Whatever, Castiel,” she said as she waved him off.

_I’m not that obvious..._

After weeks of practice, and an overabundance of stress preparing for Hofstra, the day had finally arrived. Castiel spent the entire day nearly jumping out of his seat with anticipation. He may have hated the days leading up to the festival, but he looked forward to it every year. He enjoyed watching the other schools perform, he treasured the long bus rides on the LIE to the university, and he downright savored the walk back to the buses after they performed.

Anna was already in her Marching Band uniform by the time Castiel made it to the band room. He ran over to her with a huge smile on his face. She turned towards him just in time to catch him as he wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. “It’s our final year at Hofstra! Are you excited?!”

There were tears pooling in Anna’s eyes when he pulled away. “Yup.”

“What’s wrong, Anna?” he asked as he rubbed both of her arms.

Her shoulders started to shake. “It’s our final year at Hofstra,” she sobbed.

“Oh, Anna. It’s okay!” He gave her another hug as she cried into his shoulder.

“We’ll never perform at Hofstra again. Now we’ll just be spectators,” she stated between sobs.

He grabbed both of her shoulders and held her at arm's length so he could look at her. “Anna, what’s so wrong with that? This is part of growing up. We can’t stay here and do this over and over for the rest of our lives. Plus, I don’t know about you, I have always wanted to watch our school perform in person. Watching everything on video later is not the same.”

Anna wiped the tears from her eyes and looked at Castiel. “I guess you’re right about that.”

“I know I’m right about that,” he chuckled.

“Do you promise to come with me next year?” she asked with fresh tears at the brims of her eyes.

Castiel shook his head and raised an eyebrow at Anna. “Why would I go with anyone else besides you, Jo, and Charlie? We’re band buddies, remember?”

Anna laughed and wiped the remaining tears from her eyes. “I know you’re right. I’m just gonna miss this, ya know?”

“I definitely do,” he said with a nod.

Castiel got changed in the cafeteria bathroom quickly and went back to the band room. Anna was talking to Andy, who was shamelessly trying to flirt with Anna. _She’s been turning you down for two years now. Let it go. She’s not interested._ Castiel didn’t have any issues with Andy. If anything, Andy was one of the few guys in his high school that he didn’t have a problem with. However, Andy was way too much of a pothead and Castiel knew that Anna had no interest in him. Of course, Castiel did know who Anna really wanted and it was not Andy. Unfortunately, the guy she did want, Ezekiel, has been very taken by Rachel for three years now.

Castiel walked over to save Anna from Andy’s fruitless attempt to woo her. “Oh, Castiel! I was looking for you!” Her eyes widened with relief. “Ready to get on the bus?” Her facial expression screamed, “ ** _Please, save me!_** ”

“Ready as I’ll ever be I suppose,” he said with a shrug.

Anna tightly gripped Castiel’s forearm and dragged him toward the busses. “See you there, Andy!” she yelled back at him.

When they got outside, Castiel took back his arm. “Was it entirely necessary for you to grip my arm so tightly?”

“It was completely and thoroughly necessary for me to do so!” she exclaimed. “How many times do I have to tell him no?”

He chuckled. “I have no idea.”

“Come on. Let’s get on the bus.”

Castiel pointed at the fourth row on the right side of the bus. “Do you want the window seat again?”

Anna beamed at Castiel. “You know me so well.”

“I’ve known you since the third grade, Anna. If I didn’t know you by now, I’d say we have a serious problem.”

Anna narrowed her eyes at Castiel. “Oh, shut up.”

“You only say that because you know I’m right,” he laughed.

He could hear her mockingly repeat what he said.

_See? I’m right._

When the bus was finally filled, Mr. Davies stood up by the front seat and smiled. “Is everyone ready?”

“Yeah!” everyone on the bus hollered in unison.

“Excellent! Now, if you have any questions, which I’m certain most of you won’t, I will be sitting here in the front row. I have a radio that is linked up to Mr. Turner and Ms. Harvelle on the other busses, so we’re all in contact with one another if need be.”

“Put on 106.1 BLI!!!!” Someone yelled from the front.

“Let’s not and say we did,” Dean groaned as he entered the bus. He turned to the bus driver. “Hey, Marvin? Put on 102.3.”

“You got it, Dean!” the bus driver exclaimed as he threw on his baseball cap.

“Classic rock!? Oh, come on!” the person who yelled before, which he now saw was Hester, whined.

“I am not listening to top twenty the entire ride there!” Dean turned to the rest of the bus. “Show of hands. Who wants to listen to talentless morons for the next hour?”

“They’re not talentless morons, Mr. Winchester,” Hester grumbled.

“We already know how you feel, sweetheart. Let’s hear what the others think,” he snarked as he held up a hand to silence her.

Hester crossed her arms over her chest as a few of the other flautists raised their hands in agreement with her.

“Alright, and who wants to listen to artists who are actually **_artists_** , and jam for the next hour?”

Everyone else’s hands shot up.

“Any questions?” Dean asked Hester with a condescending smile. There was no answer. “I didn’t think so.”

“WBAB it is!” Marvin shouted.

Dean made his way towards the back of the bus and stopped when he saw that Barry was the only person sitting in the seat across from Castiel. _Oh shit…_

“Hey, kid. Mind scooting over a bit so I can sit next to you?” Dean asked politely.

“Yeah… uh… sure,” Barry stuttered.

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” Barry moved towards the window without another word.

When Dean was seated he turned to Castiel with a wide grin. “Heya, Cas.”

“Hello, Dean.” Castiel looked at Dean’s bright smiling face and blushed. _Fuck, it’s like looking into the sun._

“Jesus, here we go,” Anna muttered next to him.

Castiel looked down at his oboe. _Tell me about it…_

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean hated Mondays. Not for the normal “Oh, God, it’s Monday” reason that everyone else has. It was because he wasn’t able to go to the high school to watch the marching band practice. _Shut up! I know already!_

Since October started, Dean spent his Mondays bouncing his leg in every single school desk he sat in throughout the day. He didn’t want to be there. He wanted to be making that obscenely long journey to the backfield to watch… _just say it…_ Cas. It was inconceivably comforting to know that Cas seemed to notice Dean’s absence. Jo made a show of telling him at the family dinner they had at her house the day after it happened. Dean tried, but he was pretty sure he failed, to hide that he was pleased to hear it. _It’s pathetic how happy you are about that._

Dean forgot how tiresome October actually was when he was in high school. Yet again, seeing things from the educator’s point of view made it even more exhausting. He spent most of his time stressing out about the plans that Mick, Ellen, and Rufus had laid out for the season. He felt horrible that he had to put band practice on hold for the rest of the month. However, after Pam threw a drumstick at him and told him to get his head out of his ass, he felt that it was beyond necessary. He’d say that she needs to get laid, but she gets more ass than he does.

Rufus was still beyond pissed about having to drive the golf cart to the backfield on Mondays and Wednesdays. Enraged to the point that Mick had to have a “private” conversation about the constant profanity that Rufus seemed to enjoy using during the drive there. When he wasn’t taking it out during the drive there, he was unleashing his wrath on everyone else. It was making Ellen, Mick, and Dean’s lives miserable. They were beyond lucky that none of the students had reported him. _Maybe we should sick Bobby on him…_

On the nineteenth of October, Dean was about ready to burst with the excitement that all the stress was finally going to be over. He knew that they still had one more home game, and from what Mick was telling him, Disney was more than likely going to happen in February, but he was still glad that Hofstra was going to be over. _How the fuck am I going to pull off Disney!? I almost had a heart attack the last time we had to fly down there!_

After arguing with Rufus for ten minutes about not riding in the same bus as the drumline, Dean was finally able to board the wind section on their bus. He could hear Mick giving his little speech as he approached and was pleasantly surprised to see that Marvin was the bus driver. Marvin was his bus driver all throughout high school. “Hey, Marvin! It’s been a while! How’ve you been?”

“Dean! I’ve been… well, you know,” he laughed. Marvin had a mild case of PTSD. An IUD killed his men during the Gulf War, so he was still pretty jumpy sometimes. Dean knew that his response actually meant shitty with a side of fuck it all, but he wasn’t going to share that in front of Mick.

Dean nodded in understanding.

Marvin gave Dean a wide grin. “Geez, it’s been what? Three years? What have you been up to, kid?”

Dean pursed his lips. Dean trusted Marvin because of everything he always had the strength to share with Dean, but it was neither the time or the place for sharing what he’s really been up to. “Let’s just say a lot for now and I’ll tell you later.”

Marvin nodded in agreement. “Gotcha.”

“Put on 106.1 BLI!!!!”

 _Oh, fuck no!_ Dean internally groaned when he heard the blonde in the second row yell out her request. “Let’s not and say we did.” When he reached the top step he turned to Marvin. “Hey, Marvin? Put on 102.3.”

“You got it, Dean!” Marvin put on his baseball cap and bounced in his seat with excitement.

“Classic rock!? Oh, come on!” The curt blonde whined.

Dean narrowed his eyes at her. “I am not listening to top twenty the entire ride there!” He turned to face the rest of the bus. “Show of hands. Who wants to listen to talentless morons for the next hour?”

“They’re not talentless morons, Mr. Winchester.”

 _What the hell do you know?_ “We already know how you feel, sweetheart. Let’s hear what the others think.”

The blonde brat crossed her arms over her chest as a few of the other flautists raised their hands in agreement with her.

“Alright, and who wants to listen to artists who are actually **artists,** and jam for the next hour?”

Everyone else’s hands shot up.

“Any questions?” Dean gave her a smug grin. She rolled her eyes. “I didn’t think so.”

“WBAB it is!” Marvin shouted.

Dean made his way towards the back of the bus and stopped when he saw the seat across from Cas was being occupied by only one person. The kid looked like he was around the same age as Sammy. He was wearing round-framed glasses with a thick prescription. “Hey, kid. Mind scooting over a bit so I can sit next to you?” he asked him politely.

“Yeah… uh… sure,” the kid wearing Harry Potter glasses stuttered.

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” The kid moved towards the window without another word.

When Dean was seated he faced Cas. “Heya, Cas.”

“Hello, Dean.” Castiel eyes smiled when he looked at him.

Anna mumbled something next to Cas and then turned her attention towards the window. Castiel looked down at his oboe.

“So…” Dean started. “Are you excited about tonight?”

Castiel’s gaze remained on his oboe as he answered with a smile. “Understatement.”

“It’s your final year performing at Hofstra, I’d say it’s probably bittersweet, right?”

“Perhaps…”

 _Christ, this is like pulling teeth._ They sat in silence for a few minutes. Dean was humming along to a Bad Company song on the radio when he decided to attempt asking another question. “See any good movies lately?”

Cas finally looked at Dean. “No.”

Dean laughed. “You do have the ability to say more than one word at a time, right?”

“Of course,” Cas answered with a shit-eating grin.

 _Wow!_ “You’re a little dick, huh?”

Cas raised an eyebrow at him. “I’d hardly say it’s little.”

Dean was pretty sure his heart stopped. “What!?”

“It’s far from little. I’d actually say it’s aesthetically pleasing,” he said with a shrug.

Dean swallowed hard. _Huh?_

Cas leaned a little closer to Dean and whispered. “I like seeing you _**squirm**_ ** _._ ** ”

He could feel the ghost of Cas’ breath on his ear. _Holy shit! Where the fuck did this Cas come from?_

Cas started laughing uncontrollably.

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed at the sudden change in mood. _Am I missing something?_ “What’s so funny?”

“Not so nice when it’s you, is it?” he asked as he gave Dean one of his gummy smiles.

Dean screwed up his face in confusion. “What?!”

Cas shook his head, the huge smile still lighting up his face. His eyes crinkled at the corners as he chuckled. “The second time you spoke to me, you said you liked to see me squirm.”

“I did not.”

“You did, too!”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Cas as he raised an eyebrow at Dean. He stared off into space trying to recall the conversation. _Stop thinking about how sexy his dom brow is and think back to whether or not you said that!_

“Don’t hurt yourself,” Cas said with a chuckle.

Dean pursed his lips. “That was almost two months ago. Give me a minute!”

Cas held up his hands in defense. “Sure… take your time.”

Dean replayed that morning in his head. He remembered slamming the door open. Cas asked him about whether or not he planned on doing that every morning. He said he was a clumsy, Cas disagreed and then… Dean’s eyes widened with realization. _Oh, fuck… I did… didn’t I._

“There it is!” Cas praised.

Dean huffed out a laugh. “Sorry, man. I guess I’m kind of a dick.”

“Oh, I see how it is. I’m a little dick and you’re kind of a dick,” he said as he nodded his head.

“Well, apparently, neither of us has a small dick so this conversation is kind of moot.”

Cas blurted out a small laugh. When Dean turned to look at him, Cas’ face was bright red. “Apparently.”

“Oh, Jesus, will you two stop talking about the size of your penises and get to a new fucking subject?!” Anna barked at the two of them. “I’m about to lose my lunch all over the two of you.”

“Well, I tried to ask him about movies and he failed to elaborate. So, penises are what we ended up with,” Dean replied.

“Castiel doesn’t watch movies,” Anna stated.

Dean’s jaw dropped. “What?!?!”

Anna nodded. “Trust me. I’ve been asking questions like that for years. If he has seen a movie, It’s probably because Charlie forced him to watch it.”

“Okay… Cas, what movies has Charlie forced you to watch?” Dean asked as he arched an eyebrow at Cas.

Cas started to list them as he looked up in an attempt to remember them all. “Let’s see, well I’ve watched The Lord of the Rings trilogy, The Hobbit trilogy, The Harry Potter Series, and all of the Star Wars movies.”

“That’s it?” Dean asked with more disgust than he meant.

“I have watched a few more than those, but I just have always found that my attention was better suited elsewhere,” Cas said with a shrug. “I’ve seen many of the Marvel movies, as well. The Avengers was a must on Charlie’s list. She has a bit of an obsession with Joss Whedon’s work. So, of course, that means I have watched Buffy, Angel, Dollhouse, Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog, Serenity, and Firefly. She can beg all she wants, but I cannot seem to get into Agents of Shield. I tried.”

Dean screwed up his face. “What **do** you do with your free time?”

Anna lowered her voice a few octaves in an attempt to impersonate Cas. “Last time I checked, Anna, I can get the same entertainment value from a book, perhaps even more so, than I would get from a TV show or movie.”

“There is nothing wrong with reading, Ms. Reads-too-much-JohnLock-fanfic,” Cas snapped at Anna.

She narrowed her eyes at Cas. “You enjoy it, too, and you know it.”

Castiel laughed. “That’s because it’s basically gay porn.”

“Yeah, and it’s sexy as fuck!” she exclaimed.

 _Have they completely forgot that I’m sitting here listening to all of this?_ “Fanfiction? JohnLock? Gay porn?”

Cas’ face flushed.

_Yup, definitely forgot I was listening._

“JohnLock is John Watson and Sherlock Holmes. We totally ship them,” Anna said in answer to all of Dean’s questions.

“Ship?” Dean inquired.

“Ship basically means that you want their relationship to develop romantically. Sometimes two characters have undeniable chemistry and an intensity that is too powerful to be denied. So, you want them to get together,” Cas explained. “Unfortunately, the writers of shows, like Sherlock, tend to keep their heads firmly buried in their own asses. So, they queerbait us and string us along for years. Hence, fan fiction.”

“So, fan fiction is a bunch of fans writing what they think should happen?” Dean asked.

“Exactly. A lot of them are extremely talented,” Cas confirmed. “I personally ship Cockles.”

“Cockles? What the fuck is that?” Dean asked. _I am so fucking confused._

“Not important,” Cas stated.

“If you say so,” Dean laughed.

“Misha is so fucking hot!” Anna moaned.

Cas shrugged. “I’m more of a Jensen man myself…” Cas turned to Dean. “Hmm, you kind of… nevermind.” Cas shook his head putting an end to the subject. “So, Dean, besides Led Zeppelin, what kind of music do you listen to?”

Dean gave Cas a wide grin. _Now, that I can talk about for hours._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge shout out to my friend, SubtEXt! The whole JohnLock conversation was inspired by her. After we met through GISHWHES this past summer, she introduced me to this amazing world of fanfiction. If it wasn't for her, I would never have worked up the courage to write this monstrosity. So, thank you, SubtEXt!


	14. Chapter Fourteen

Castiel had no idea how he pulled off teasing Dean without stammering through every word. The overwhelming presence that was Dean was filling his senses and making it hard to breathe, let alone think.  _ I’m gonna blame it on the musk… _

He had to admit that causing Dean to experience some semblance of discomfort, made up for a lot of what Dean had put him through within the first week of knowing him. If he was to be completely honest with himself, Anna’s company helped alleviate most of the stress he was experiencing. Especially after her outburst about getting off the subject of penises, he knew he could make it through the bus ride with her by his side. There was a bit of a backtrack when she felt it was necessary to bring up his favorite version of gay porn. However, music, as always, was the conversation’s saving grace.

The amount of passion Dean had when it came to music was awe-inspiring. At one point in Castiel's life, he would have said Dean’s passion matched his own, but after middle school… well, things changed.

Dean was very dedicated to the art itself. He may have been into classic rock more than any other genre, but he knew in order to appreciate the art itself, you have to study the masters before you can find your sound. With that idea in mind, he was classically trained to play more than one instrument. Dean could play the trombone, clarinet, drums, piano, trumpet, and cello. Dean explained he knew without a doubt, his first and favorite instrument would always be the guitar.

Castiel was pleasantly surprised to find out they shared a lot of the same tastes in music. Castiel went into detail about how his Aunt Amara had a lot to do with his musical preferences. She introduced him to The Who, The Rolling Stones, AC/DC, Led Zeppelin, and The Beatles. Still, as Dean was well aware of, The Beatles were his favorite. Dean wasn’t as big of a fan of The Beatles as Castiel, but he agreed they did revolutionize certain aspects of the music industry and he could understand the appeal because his mom also loved them.

After discussing musical tastes, Dean went on a twenty-minute rant about his band, “Raised from Perdition.” The amount of information Dean was divulging to Castiel was probably more than he should have been sharing. For example, Dean told Castiel that Garth, who played lead guitar, once chugged an entire beer within a minute and then passed out after a fit of giggles. Benny, who played sax and bass, was dating a girl who had a blood play fetish. The drummer, Pam, had a horrible break-up from some guy named Jesse last year, who was an addict and a cheater. Dean didn’t elaborate on what drug or who he cheated on her with, but Castiel felt he probably already knew too much.

“So, basically they’re like your family?” Castiel asked.

Dean nodded as he pursed his lips. “Basically. It’s like Bobby says ‘Family don’t end in blood, boy,’” Dean said, nailing his Bobby impersonation.

“Well, they sound like a very interesting bunch of people.”

Dean screwed up his face. “I don’t know about interesting. Insane is closer to the truth.” Dean pointed to a weirdly placed bruise which was almost fully healed near his left ear.

Castiel’s eyebrows raised. “How did that happen?”

“Pam, the angel she is, told me to get my head out of my ass because my mind was elsewhere during practice,” he said as he shook his head and laughed.

“Sounds like someone Jo would get along with her,” Anna added.

Dean started to laugh. “Actually, the first time they met was pretty hilarious.”

“How so?” Anna asked with a maniacal grin.

_ What's that about? _

“Well, Pam… she…” Dean shook his head at his feet. “How do I put this?” He looked back up and wet both of his lips before he spoke. “She likes to flaunt her sexuality. She’s hot and she knows it.”

Castiel nodded his head. “Hmm… sounds familiar.”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Castiel as Anna laughed at him. “We’re not talking about me right now. Are we?”

“Who said I was talking about you?” Castiel asked as he tilted his head.

“Shut up!” Dean snapped back with a smile. “Anyway, Jo came out to a gig we had in Brooklyn. She wore this tight black spaghetti strap dress with these super high heels. Needless to say, she looked good.”

“I think I know what dress you’re talking about. Charlie told me about it…” Castiel had known for years Charlie had a hopeless crush on Jo. She was there when Jo bought the dress and shoes. Charlie didn’t stop talking about it for almost a month. Still, he knew this was not information Charlie would want others to know about. So, it was better for him to just stop talking.

Dean arched an eyebrow at Castiel. “Really?”

Castiel shrugged.

Dean laughed. It was obvious he knew where Castiel would have eventually gone with his remark had he continued to speak. “So, back to the story. Jo was getting hit on the entire night. This one guy was particularly handsy and would not leave her alone. I was about to lose my shit on him when out of nowhere, Pam comes along and wraps her arms around Jo’s waist from behind. She kissed Jo’s neck and said, ‘Hey, Baby. You miss me?’”

Both Anna and Castiel’s jaws drop.

“Yeah!” Dean exclaimed while nodding emphatically. “So, Jo leans back into Pam and says, ‘Hey, Sweetie! I was starting to worry. Where have you been?’ and kisses her on the cheek.”

Anna scoffed. “No fucking way!”

“Let me finish!” he laughed. “So, this moron goes, ‘So, she’s the reason why you’re not in the mood to play? You guys ever thought about adding a third?’ Jo rears back and nails this guy right in the nose. Then, as the guy grabs his face, Pam comes over and junk punches him.”

Anna gasped. “Oh, my god!”

“While the guy was on the floor grabbing his nuts, Pam grabs Jo’s ass and says, ‘I don’t share, fuck boy,’ then walks away with her arm around Jo’s shoulder. One of the funniest things I have ever seen in my life.” Dean reared his head back and laughed with his entire body. “Best part, Jo smacks Pam after because grabbing her ass because, apparently, that was going too far. Pam’s answer, ‘We had to be convincing. Didn’t we, sugar?’”

“What happened after that?” Castiel inquired.

“Well, they got along great after that. Jo did make it perfectly clear she doesn’t swing that way, but she appreciated the back-up. Jo doesn’t have a problem with it, she just doesn’t feel that way about girls, ya know?”

“Yup,” Castiel and Anna agreed in unison.

Dean laughed. “Never been into girls, Cas?”

“Nope. Not once. I’ve known for a very long time I’m gay,” Castiel stated.

“Nothing wrong with it,” Dean said with a shrug. “I only realized I’m bi when I got into my senior year of high school.”

_ Explains why Gabriel never saw him with any guys… _  “Really?”

“Yeah… I had… well, there were… Yeah, um, I’d prefer not to say anything about it,” Dean stammered out.

“You don’t have to share. No one is forcing you,” Anna smiled.

Dean gave a short smile and coughed as he rubbed the back of his neck. “So… um, Cas, are you trying out for the musical?”

“Cas...tiel doesn’t sing in front of people. At least, not anymore,” Anna answered for him.

If looks could kill... Castiel turned and glared at Anna. From the look in her eyes, she knew she stepped over a line.  _ Damn, right you did! _

“Really? Why not?”

“I just don’t,” Castiel spat as he turned to look at Dean.

Dean held up both of his hands. “Whoa! Didn’t know it was a touchy subject.”

“It’s not a touchy subject,” Castiel grumbled.

“Okay… then why did you almost bite my head off when I asked why you don’t sing in front of people anymore?” Dean asked as he narrowed his eyes at Castiel.

“I sing in front of people.”

“Singing in the chorus doesn’t count, Cas. You know it,” Dean shot back.

“Stage fright!” Anna blurted out.

“Stage fright?” Dean asked sarcastically as he leaned to his left to look Anna in the face.

Castiel nodded.

“I’m gonna call bullshit and drop the subject. How about that?” Dean asked both Anna and Castiel.

Castiel nodded again. “Sounds good to me.”

They all sat in silence for a couple of moments. “However,” Dean started.

_ Oh, Christ, here we go. _

“I am going to say you can’t let the past keep you from doing something you love doing. The pain of the past should not dictate what you do in the future. Shit happens, mistakes happen, but you can’t let the past haunt you forever.”

“Speaking from experience, Dean?” Anna asked with a knowing smile.

“We’ve all made mistakes. My mistakes just happen to have a family tree of mistakes along for the ride,” Dean smiled softly at Anna before he turned to Castiel. “Sometimes your mistakes help you learn and lead you to the right decision in the future.”

Castiel chuckled. “That was very inspirational. You should teach a class.”

Dean threw his head back with a laugh. “What? How to get over fucking up 101?”

Castiel shrugged. “I think…” The bus came to a stop as they took a spot in the university parking lot.  _ Are we here already? _

“Alright, everyone. Make sure you have everything you need. We will not be coming back here until much later this evening. Is everyone excited!?” Mr. Davies asked with an enormous smile.

“YEAH!!!!!” Everyone screamed.

“Alright, then! Let’s get a move on!”

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean knew he was oversharing, but for some reason, he felt comfortable telling Cas almost anything. He had to stop himself a few times because he realized Anna was also there, listening. He preferred she did not know some of the things that he would have been willing to share with Cas if they were alone. Not that he minded having her there. She was a welcome presence. He knew Cas probably wouldn’t have been as much at ease without her there.  _ I wonder what he’s like when he’s around Charlie. _

Every time Cas looked at him, as corny as it was, it felt like no one else was in the room. Or in this situation, the bus. Again, it was only when Anna would throw in her two cents he would come back to earth and realize he should watch what he was doing. He was still technically working even though it was a Thursday.  _ I’m sure she can probably see the hearts in my eyes everytime I look at him, too. _

Besides the whole Cas being undereducated in the world of movies and television, they had a lot in common.  _ Charlie gave him an introduction to the cinematic world. It’s my job to further his education… that is… if he lets me. _  He had so many more questions to ask. So many more things he wanted to know about Cas. However, on a bus heading to Hofstra was not the place.  _ Take a chance. Ask him out. Or at least ask for his number! _

Dean could tell Cas had a serious passion for music. When he brought up his Aunt Amara and the role she played in his life of music, he could hear the admiration in his voice. He obviously looked up to her in an enormous way. From what he could tell, he originally wanted to be just like her.  _ What happened? _  When Dean asked about the musical, he was surprised by Cas’ reaction. He would have thought Cas would be all over that. Especially since he is in Concert Choir. The musical and being in that class always seemed to go hand in hand.

It was only when he started to think about what everyone had said to him about Cas, he realized he was right. ‘Stagefright’ had nothing to do with it.

When Rufus tried to warn him off from Cas, he had explained, “You should have seen him the first time I met him. Nearly had a panic attack stepping in front of that piano.”

Before the march to field on Homecoming, he remembered Ellen mentioned to him, “Castiel has fought his way out of hell more than once. Don’t hurt him.”

Then, later that same day, he was told by Alastair, “At least he knows his place. He learned his lesson the first time.”

Dean finally puts two and two together,  _ Alastair. _

Now, more than ever, he hated himself for ever being affiliated with the dick. Cas once had the same amount of passion for music as Dean, maybe even more. Alastair took it away from him in some way. He took his spark, his power, his meaning.  _ If you plan on taking this any further with Cas, you have to tell him sooner rather than later that you and Al have a history. Lily can wa… no, he needs to know about her, too. _

When they exited the bus, Dean knew he wouldn’t get a chance to talk to Cas until later during the bus ride home. At that point, everyone would be too exhausted to talk anyway.  _ Perfect time to ask for his fucking number!!!! _

“Hey, Dean!” he heard Jo yelling for him as they made their way to the bleachers of the university’s football field.

“Hi, Jo!” he hollered back with a smile.

When she got up close to him she punched him in the arm. “Asshole!”

He grabbed his arm and held it close to his chest.  _ Fuck, she punches like a freight train.  _ “What the fuck was that for?”

“I didn’t tell people at school about the bar incident for a reason!” she berated him.

“Who told you I said something?”  _ Do not tell me it was Cas. _

“Anna! She was group messaging Charlie and I the entire bus ride to Hofstra! Do you understand… you just… you’re a fucking idiot!” she yelled before she stomped off.

“You really did cross a line there, Hun.” Dean turned around to find Ellen standing behind him with her arms crossed over her chest, face held in a scowl.

“Care to explain? I was just telling a funny story. Now I feel like a piece of shit and I don’t even know why!” Dean threw his hands up in the air before he brought his arm back to his chest to start rubbing it again.  _ Shit, that really fucking hurt. _

“Charlie.”

“What about her?” Dean asked.

“Not my place to tell you. However, you basically just admitted, without meaning to, that Jo let someone she met for the first time kiss her neck and grope her.”

“Yeah, and I also said she slapped said person afterward and said she crossed a line!” Dean snapped.

“Well, that’s not how Charlie saw it and it doesn’t sound like that’s what they were told,” Ellen pursed her lips at Dean. “Apologize to the two of them and explain to them exactly what was said.”

Dean glowered at Ellen.  _ I knew I was saying too much. _  “Fine!” Dean stomped off and made his way to the bleachers.

 

>>>>>>

 

“Charlie! What’s wrong?” Castiel asked as soon as he saw Charlie’s red puffy eyes.

“I’m stupid,” she whispered.

“No! You’re most certainly not! What happened?”

Charlie looked down at her shoes. “Anna told us everything Dean talked about on the bus.”

Castiel swallowed hard.  _ Shit! Did she tell her that I basically told Dean about her crush on Jo? _  “And what did Dean say?”

Charlie rolled her eyes. “You should know! You were there!”

_ Wait a second… That is not a blaming you voice. That is an I’m pissed at something else voice. _  “Are you referring to the story about the guy from the bar in Brooklyn?”

“Yes!” she yelled.

“Okay, so you’re upset that Pam got a little overzealous while being her back up and then Jo smacked her later for going way too far?”

“Jo, what?” Charlie’s face instantly sobered.

“Jo smacked Pam for going too far with the whole pretending to be her girlfriend thing to get the guy to leave her alone. Apparently, he was extremely handsy and was harassing her,” Castiel answered in disgust as he thought about the moron who touched Jo.

Charlie shook her head in an attempt to clear it. “So, wait. Jo smacked her?”

“Yes. Jo smacked her,” Castiel answered. “Then Jo explained in no uncertain terms she was not interested.”

Charlie’s face broke into a face-splitting grin. “Really?!"

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Yes, really!”

She jumped up and kissed him on the cheek before she gave him a huge hug. “Thanks, Bestie!”

“You are so lucky I love you, weirdo,” he groaned.

“I know.”

“Charlie!” Castiel recognized Dean’s voice instantly.

“Dean!” Charlie turned around and gave Dean a hug.

Dean’s hands were held up at his sides. His face screwed up with a horrified expression. " ** _What the fuck?_**  " Dean mouthed at Castiel.

Castiel shrugged and shook his head as he held his hands before him. His face clearly stating " **_I don’t fucking know."_ **

Dean laughed at Castiel and wrapped his arms around Charlie to hug her back.

Charlie pulled away from the hug and kissed Dean on the cheek before she ran off.

Dean approached Castiel with a sweet smile. “So… I’m assuming I don’t have to beg Charlie for forgiveness for a crime I did not commit?”

“It appears so.”

Dean laughed then looked at his bicep. “Jo punched me on my way to the bleachers because of what we talked about on the bus. She was pretty pissed that I mentioned what happened at the bar.”

“Well, from the way Charlie reacted when I told her Jo smacked Pam, I don’t think Anna told them everything. Jo was most likely upset that you left out that detail.”

“But I didn’t!” Dean growled.

Anna walked over with a huge grin on her face.”Hey, guys!”

“What the hell Anna?!?!?! Why did you text the?!?!” Dean admonished.

“Just giving them a little push.” She gave Dean and Castiel a megawatt smile. “Gotta say, Dean, that story couldn’t have come at a better time.”

Castiel furrowed his eyebrows. “What are you talking about?”  _ I am so confused… _

“One, I knew this would piss the both of them off. Two, I knew Charlie would be devastated and Jo can’t bear to see her upset. It hurts Jo more than she cares to admit. Three, I knew you would come in to fill in the blanks for Charlie. Which would ultimately solve problems one and two and turn into what I just witnessed under the bleachers.”

Dean and Castiel looked at each other before they looked back at Anna. “And that is?” Dean asked.

“Them making up,” her grin grew impressively wider.

“Making up?” Castiel asked.

Just when Anna was about to answer, Dean gently slapped Castiel’s chest with the back of his hand, then pointed to the bottom steps of the bleachers. Charlie and Jo were holding hands. As they slowly made their way up the stairs and into better view, Castiel noticed both of their lips were red and it wasn’t lipstick.

_ No friggin way!!!! _

Castiel’s gaze locked with the eyes of his best friend. He smiled as she blushed at him.

“Not into that sort of thing my ass!” Dean exclaimed.

“Shut up!” Jo fired back. “I wasn’t into that sort of the thing with Pam. Charlie…” she smiled sweetly at Charlie. “Well, she’s my exception.”

“Took you long enough,” Anna chastised as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Charlie narrowed her eyes at Anna. “What does that mean?”

Anna turned and looked at Castiel. Her eyes expressed an apology for what was about to be said before she turned her attention back to Charlie. “Castiel mentioned he knew about the dress Jo wore that night because you told him about it.” She shook her head. “We’ve all known, except Jo apparently, that you have been hooked on her for  **years.**  I knew about the dress because Jo told me about how you lit up like the fourth of July when you saw her wearing it. She talked about how adorable you were when it came to the fucking dress for a month straight.”

Jo’s mouth went into a thin line. Charlie’s expression changed to a dopey smile.

“There have been other things Jo has  **obsessed** over throughout the years too. I knew the story involving this stupid dress, would be the special straw which I have been waiting for to break the proverbial camel’s back,” Anna explained. “And it would finally get Jo to pull her head out of her ass!”

“Brilliant,” Castiel stated with all sincerity. “Wish I’d thought of it myself.”

Charlie held Jo’s hand a little tighter. “You think you could wear the dress for me again sometime?” she asked as she wiggled her eyebrows at Jo.

Jo bit her bottom lip and blushed. “Only if you wear your Queen of Moons battle gear,” she failed to whisper.

Charlie looked coyly at the ground before she looked back at Jo. “You seriously like that?”

Jo nodded vigorously. “You have no fucking idea.”

“Okay! Well, I’ve heard enough,” Dean announced. “I’m just gonna go down there with the rest of the teachers and try to mentally pour battery acid all over that image. So, if you’ll excuse me.”

_ No goodbye? _

As if Dean could hear Castiel’s thoughts, he faced Castiel quickly and gave him a bashful grin. “See you later, Cas?”

Castiel laughed. “Of course.”

Dean beamed at Castiel’s response. “Awesome! Later, Cas.”

“Goodbye, Dean.”

“Bye, ladies,” he said with a wink at the three of them. Dean took one final glance at Castiel as he bit his bottom lip then made his way down the bleacher steps.

Jo continued to watch Dean descend down the stairs as she spoke. “And I thought you had it bad,” Jo huffed.

Charlie pointed at herself. “Me?”

Jo pointed a thumb behind her, not even bothering to turn around and look at Castiel. “Him.”

“I was on the bus with them for a little over an hour. Trust me… I know,” Anna groaned. “They spent a good two minutes talking about their dicks.”

Jo and Charlie turned around at the same time with matching mischievous grins.

_ Why me? _

 

>>>>>>

 

“All fixed?” Ellen inquired as soon as Dean was in front of her.

“Yes,” Dean groaned. “And now I need brain bleach.”

Ellen chuckled. “I was wondering when she would finally figure shit out.”

“You knew?!” Dean asked. He was completely baffled.

“Of course, I knew. I’m her mother,” Ellen huffed. “Those two have been in love with each other for years. Jo was just being a stubborn ass about it.”

“Well…” Dean’s eyes widened. “Yeah… don’t know what to say.”

Ellen laughed. “You don’t have to say anything, Hun.”

“Hmmm, actually I have one thing to say.”

“And what’s that?”

“Pam’s gonna be pissed it wasn’t her,” Dean chortled.

Ellen shook her head and walked away.

_ What?! It’s true!!! _

The hours leading up to the performance were torture. Dean kept looking up at Cas, wishing he could sit there with him.  _ That would be highly inappropriate. On the bus is one thing. Out here is different. _

About fifteen minutes before they were due out on the field, Rufus started shouting for everyone to line up under the bleachers. Dean followed everyone under the bleachers and made sure the drumline was paying attention to what Rufus was saying. One of the students Rufus always seemed to be yelling at, Andy, was busy trying to flirt with some of the Kickline girls from Islip while everyone else was lining up.

Dean walked over to him, grabbed him by the back of his Marching Band jacket and dragged him to the rest of the drumline.

Andy’s arms were flailing all over the place as he tried to fight Dean off. “Yo!!! Didn’t you see I was busy, man?”

_ You’ve got to be kidding me…  _ “Didn’t you see we’re all busy,  **man** ?”

Andy waved Dean off. “Pfft, I had time!”

Dean’s mouth formed into a thin line. “Andy, I swear on your almighty pot nug, if you don’t get into the friggin line-up right the hell now, I will personally make sure every single woman on this earth thinks you have genital herpes.”

“But…”

“Do I look like I’m joking, Andy?” Dean asked with a stern expression.

Andy tried his best to stand his ground until he finally admitted defeat and joined the rest of the marching band.

“How in the hell did you do that?” Rufus asked as Dean approached him.

“I threatened him,” Dean said with a shrug.

Rufus shook his head. “I threaten that dumbass almost every day. Nothing ever works.”

“Did you threaten to tell every woman on this earth he has genital herpes?” Dean inquired as he raised his eyebrows and pursed his lips at Rufus.

Rufus stared at Dean for a moment, his facial expression was giving nothing away. “Nope,” Rufus admitted.

“You should try it some time. Does wonders,” Dean suggested.

Rufus shook his head. “I don’t think he’s gonna try to pull that shit again. He’ll be too afraid you’ll say something.”

“Rufus, I’m not going to be here forever. Eventually, he’s gonna do something stupid again.”

Rufus gave Dean a mischievous grin. “Well, I’ll just have to think of more interesting threats to make. Won’t I?”

Dean shook his head and chuckled as he walked away from Rufus to check up on the rest of the Marching Band.

Anxiety was palpable in every row of the Marching Band as Dean made his way down the line of students waiting to finally make their way out onto the field. Many of the students were shaking out their hands in an attempt to release some of their pre-performance jitters.

Dean never had a problem being in front of a group of people. When he was one of the many students who performed for the festival, he was always more excited than nervous. He would bounce from one foot to the other with anticipation of the amazing performance he knew they would undoubtedly give.

Apparently, Cas was the exact opposite. Cas’ skin was pale and moist with sweat. He was taking deep labored breaths and trying his best not to pass out.

Dean walked over to Cas’ side where Anna was trying and failing to get Cas to calm down. “Castiel, you’ve done this before. There is no need to worry. You’re making yourself sick.”

Dean stepped in front of Cas to get his attention. “Hey, Cas, buddy? Look at me.”

Cas looked at Dean and started shaking his head. “I’m gonna be fine. I swear.”

Dean took Cas’ oboe from him and handed it to Anna. He grabbed hold of Cas’ shoulders to steady him. “Are you sure? Cause you look like you’re ready to either vomit or pass out.”

Cas was nodding his head adamantly. “I’ll be okay. I swear. I just have anxiety issues when it comes to performing in front of large groups of people.”

“Well, you’re not all alone out there. You have over a hundred students who are going to be right there with you, marching along to the music of your favorite band. You got this! Now, look at me.”

Cas looked into Dean’s eyes. There was so much raw emotion flooding Dean’s senses. Having those brilliant eyes on him was making it hard to breathe, let alone speak. He tried his best to get the next words out in an even tone. “I need you to take a couple of deep breaths with me. Can you do that?”

Cas nodded his head as he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Eyes on me, Cas.”

Cas’ eyes shot open and locked back onto Dean’s. “Good. Now, in.”

Castiel took a deep breath in with Dean.

“And out.”

Cas’ arms found their way to Dean’s sides then slowly, yet gently, traveled down to his hips as they released their breath.

His heart skipped a beat as the rest of the world disappeared. Dean felt his body move without his permission as he lowered his hands from Cas’ shoulders to his biceps and stepped in closer. “In one more time.”

The startling sapphire blue of Cas’ eyes changed before him. They had turned dark, lustful. He felt Cas gravitate closer to him.

Dean let out his breath with Cas. He licked his lips.

Cas’ eyes followed the movement with rapt attention.

He wanted nothing more than to lean in and steal a kiss.  _ I know he wants it, too. Just make the mo... _

“Uh-hmm.”

The sound broke whatever spell Dean and Cas were under as they turned their heads towards it.

Anna stood there gawking at the two of them as she held on to the oboes. “Neither the time or the place, boys. You can fuck each other with your eyes later, okay?”

Dean looked at the placement of Cas’ hands, then his own.  _ What the fuck am I doing!? _  He took a quick step back, released Cas’ arms, and cleared his throat. He was mildly aware that his pants were suddenly tighter than normal.  _ Shit!  _ “Did that help at all?” He asked as he rubbed the back of his neck.

“Yes,” Cas breathed.

“Good. Very good. Um…” Dean started to back away slowly. “I’m gonna just go do stuff over here. Break a leg, you two!”

“Thanks, Dean,” Cas murmured.

Dean felt his expression soften. “Anytime, Cas.” His face flush. “Later, Anna.” He turned around and traipsed over to one of the stadium bathrooms.

When he walked in, he went to one of the stalls and locked the door behind him. He looked down at the bulge in his pants and groaned.  _ I’m mad at you! This is about ninety-five percent your fault!  _ He unbuttoned his jeans and pulled down the zipper to alleviate some of the pressure.

He knew he couldn’t take care of it at the stadium so he started to think of everything he found disgusting.  _ Feet, used tissues, communal bars of soap, Sam’s coffee… _

When his boner finally went away he zippered, buttoned up, exited the stall, and washed his hands before he left. He went out to see if the Marching Band had made their way over to the field yet.

When he heard Rufus’ whistle blow, he knew they were about to start.  _ FUCK!!!! _

He ran to the field entrance. Luckily, they were only entering the field to take their positions. He walked quickly over to Ellen.

“Have fun?!” she asked with a knowing smile.

Dean groaned. “I didn’t do anything.”

He looked down at his crotch.  _ If I get in trouble I will blame you. I won’t tell them I blame you, but we’ll know it’s your fault. _

Dean turned to Mick and watched as he waved his baton to signal for the band to start.

 

>>>>>>

 

“I think I’m gonna pass out, Anna,” Castiel said as he started to shake.

Anna placed a hand on Castiel’s shoulder. “You’re not going to pass out! It’s going to be okay. You’re just worried about the performance. Try to relax and breath.”

“Don’t tell me to relax!” He snapped at her.

She shook her head and started to rub soothing circles on his back. “Castiel, you’ve done this before. There is no need to worry. You’re making yourself sick.”

“Hey, Cas, buddy? Look at me.”

_ Oh, please don’t come near me right now. _  He shook his head. “I’m gonna be fine. I swear.”

Dean took Castiel’s oboe from him and handed it to Anna.  _ Hey! I need that! _

Castiel felt Dean’s hands grasp his shoulders. “Are you sure? Cause you look like you’re ready to either vomit or pass out.”

He nodded his head. “I’ll be okay. I swear. I just have anxiety issues when it comes to performing in front of large groups of people.”

Dean smiled sweetly. “Well, you’re not all alone out there. You have over a hundred students who are going to be right there with you, marching along to the music of your favorite band. You got this! Now, look at me.”

Castiel looked into Dean’s eyes and was instantly lost in their complexity and beauty. All of the stress and anxiety he was feeling were suddenly useless figments of his imagination. They had no business being in the world the two of them were occupying.

“I need you to take a couple of deep breaths with me. Can you do that?”

Castiel nodded his head.  _ I can do that.  _ He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Eyes on me, Cas.”

He quickly opened his eyes and was startled by the intensity of Dean’s gaze as he held it.

“Good. Now, in.”

He breathed in with Dean. He was almost lightheaded being in such close proximity to Dean.

“And out.”

As he exhaled, he put his hands on Dean’s sides to steady himself. Within moments, he started to regret his decision. He could feel the muscles underneath the fabric of his shirts as he slowly let his hands caress Dean’s sides until they rested on his hips. His hip bones were just underneath his thumbs. At that moment, he was tempted to grab and take what he wanted.

“In one more time.” Dean’s words started to sound labored as his hands moved down Castiel’s arms and took a step closer towards Castiel.

_ Maybe he can feel it, too. _

His assumptions were confirmed when he saw the emerald of Dean’s eyes disappear behind the onyx of his dilated pupils. His arousal was apparent as he exhaled another breath with Castiel.

Castiel moved forward as he followed Dean’s tongue as he wet his lips.  _ I want to taste him. _

“Uh-hmm.”

Castiel and Dean turned toward the sound.

Anna stood there gawking at the two of them as she held on to the oboes. “Neither the time or the place, boys. You can fuck each other with your eyes later, okay?”

Dean looked between the two of them and must have noticed something wrong as he let go of Castiel. “Did that help at all?” Dean inquired. His hand moved to the back of his neck.

_ I don’t know. Maybe? Can we go back to about thirty seconds ago? That way we can refresh my memory.  _ “Yes,” Cas breathed. His answer barely audible to his own ears. He could hear his blood rushing through him as his heart raced.

“Good. Very good. Um…” Dean started to back away slowly. “I’m gonna just go do stuff over here. Break a leg, you two!”

“Thanks, Dean,” Cas whispered.

Dean gave Castiel a gentle smile. “Anytime, Cas,” he cooed, his blush accentuating his freckles. “Later, Anna.” Dean turned away from Anna and Castiel and trailed off in the direction of the bathrooms.

“I agree with Jo,” Anna declared.

Castiel turned towards Anna in a daze. “Huh?”

Anna handed Castiel his oboe. “The two of you are hopeless.”

Castiel tilted his head. “Why do you say that?”

“Another two minutes and the two of you would have started to either make out or jizz in your pants,” she laughed.

Castiel had been vaguely aware he was half hard in his pants. “Well…” he cleared his throat. “I think it is safe to assume maybe Dean is interested.”

Anna’s jaw dropped. “It’s safe to assume? You’re kidding me, right?”

“What?”

“No. Pfft. What would have ever given you that idea?” she asked sardonically. “Dude has only been staring at you and flirting with you for over a month and a half.” She shook her head. “Dumb ass.”

“Alright, everyone! Time to start heading towards the field!” Mr. Davies announced. “As always DO NOT, under any circumstances, let your foot cross the line onto the field before Mr. Turner blows the whistle.”

_ I think we know by now. You’ve only said it about thousand times at this point. _

When they got out to the field they took their places in the end zone. Castiel took a few deep breaths. Every time he would exhale he would picture the look in Dean’s eyes as he held him.  _ Not right now, you dumbass!!!! _

When Mr. Turner blew his whistle, everyone started to make their way out to the field.

Castiel saw Dean running onto the field.  _ He almost missed it. _

Castiel faced forward as soon as he hit his mark and waited for Mr. Davies to wave his baton. As soon as the baton made its first swish through the air, the band started to play.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've been going back to chapters I've already posted and I've been editing everything. I didn't have a chance to really edit this one like I have with chapters one to five, but I plan on doing it with every single one of them. Apparently, the editing process is never over. As always, enjoy!

After the performance, Dean walked back to the bus. He had no reason to stay in the stands with everyone else. As he approached the bus, he could see Marvin in the driver seat eating a sandwich and watching something on his cellphone. 

“Hey, Marvin!”

Marvin turned to Dean as he was still chewing on a piece of his sandwich and locked his cell phone before he put it down. “Dean!” He looked around. “Where is everyone else?

Dean pointed behind him. “There are still two more bands that need to perform before they’re allowed to leave. I just beat the traffic of everyone leaving by getting here first. Plus, I said I was gonna talk to ya, didn’t I?”

Marvin’s face split into a wide grin. “You sure did.” He put his sandwich on the foil in front of him and wiped his hands on the napkin next to it. “Come on in and sit down.”

He sat down on the front seat then turned towards Marvin. “What were you watching?”

“Promise not to pick on me?”

Dean chuckled. “Why would I laugh?”

“I was watching this Spanish drama I found on Netflix. It’s called ‘The Grand Hotel’. I want Julio and Alicia to get together. They’re made for each other. Dona Teresa seems to think that Diego is better suited for Alicia, but I think he killed Julio’s sister. Their marriage will be a sham.”

“Well, buddy, I’m not gonna laugh. I have… Well, Dr. Sexy MD is a serious guilty pleasure of mine. So, I have no right to speak,” Dean admitted.

Marvin smiled. “Well, at least there is no judging.”

“Of course not.”

They sat in silence for a moment or two. “So… You said you’d tell me what you’d been up to,” Marvin stated.

“I did.”

“So, what have you been up to?”

Dean took a deep breath. “Well… College is a lot of work, which I expected, but so far I’m doing pretty well. I started a band with Garth. You remember him?”

Marvin nodded his head. “Of course. Skinny kid, always super happy and polite?”

“Yup, that’s the one,” he said as he snapped his fingers and then pointed at Marvin. “We almost got picked up by a label. They’re based out of New York City and London. We had a gig lined up and everything.” Dean looked down at his boots. “I kind of fucked it up.”

Marvin’s eyebrows furrowed. “How so?”

“A girl.”

Marvin nodded his head in understanding. “Been there.”

“It wasn’t just the girl. If it was just the girl, I would have been able to make it to the gig,” Dean huffed as he shook his head.

Marvin leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest while he looked at Dean. “Well, then what else was it?”

“I lost myself in a world of stupid shit. She kinda introduced me to this island’s drug culture and I thought it was a good idea to get lost in it.”

“Heroin, huh?”

Dean looked up and furrowed his eyebrows. “Yeah… How’d you kn…”

Marvin cut him off. “I had a rough time when I got back from the Middle East, Dean. I made some stupid decisions. A lot of wrong choices.”

Dean scoffed. “Yeah, well, Lily was a seriously wrong choice. I almost lost everyone, Marvin. The horrible shit that I did. I disappeared for months on them. The entire time I was lost in a drug-induced haze at her mansion in St James. When I wasn’t there, I was fucked up at her cousin and dealer’s house. I’m such a major league fuck up, man.”

Marvin glowered at Dean. “I don’t agree with you on that. You’re far from a fuck up.”

Dean raised an eyebrow at Marvin. “You sure about that?”

“Positive. You wouldn’t be here right now if you were.”

Dean nodded his head. “I sure don’t feel like a winner, Marvin.”

“You are in my book, kid,” Marvin smiled. “Can I ask you a personal question?”

Dean laughed. “I think I’ve been pretty personal tonight already, but yeah, sure. Why not?”

“What made you leave? What made you quit?”

“Well, a lot of things really. The major reason, Sammy,” he breathed. “He called me.” Dean bounced his head around a bit. “He was blowing up my phone for months, but I never answered. This time, I answered.” He took a deep breath. “Bobby got hurt at work. Some moron at the shop didn’t put one of the drills back where it belongs… well, let me just say it wasn’t pretty.”

Marvin’s face screwed up in disgust.

“Sammy was freaking out. Understandably so.” Dean clicked his tongue and took another deep breath. “Bobby is our dad. John may have been my father, but Bobby is my dad. I realized at that moment, if something happened to Bobby and I wasn’t there, Sam would have no one. Everyone is dead. My grandparents on both sides, my parents. There are no aunts and uncles. It’s just the three of us. I can’t leave him alone like that. So, I decided to leave.”

“You made the right choice,” Marvin smiled.

“Yeah? Al and Lily didn’t make it seem like it was. Lily didn’t let me go at first. I had to dig myself out of the hole I was buried in and she wouldn’t let me. She told me I was being stupid and that I didn’t need to waste my time chasing after my family. The day after Sam called, I snuck out while she was passed out. Walked all the way home. Then spent the next week going through withdrawals. Fucking sucked. I’ll never forgive myself.” 

“Dean.” Marvin shook his head. “We all make bad choices. The hard part is not making the same bad decision twice. Or even a third time. You got through it. I have faith that you’ll continue to get through it,” he said with a grin.

“Well, so far so good. However, Al goes to the high school. So, that’s been a thorn in my side since I found that out. Guy’s a major league dick.”

“Oh, God. Do you mean Alastair Lucif?” Marvin asked with revulsion.

“Yeah. You know him?”

Marvin shivered with abhorrence. “Ugh, unfortunately. They changed my bus route the year after you graduated. I was unfortunate enough to get stuck with that dick’s bus route. He made my life miserable for two months until I begged them to give me my old route back.”

“I’m sorry, man. I knew he was a dick when I first met him, but I don’t think I realized just how much of one he was until I… well until I saw how he treated Cas,” Dean looked down at his boots.

“Cas? As in Castiel?” Marvin asked. “The kid you were talking to earlier, right?”

“Yeah. He’s a great guy.”

“Alastair fucked him up, Dean.”

Dean looked up into Marvin’s horrified expression. “What do you mean by that?” he asked as the anger started to flow off of him in waves.

“He put him in the hospital. He would brag about it in hushed tones to his buddies on the bus. Almost as if it was a victory to utterly destroy the kid.”

“What did he do, Marvin?” Dean asked with a growl.

“Well, the kid, Castiel, was practicing for a talent show sometime in middle school. It was either in eighth grade or ninth grade? He was in the auditorium with one of his friends or something. I don’t remember all of the details. All I know is that later that day, they cornered him in the gym locker room and assaulted him. The kid ended up in the hospital.”

Dean balled his fists. He squeezed so hard his knuckles cracked.

Marvin held up his hands in defense. “That’s what he said. I don’t know how much of it is true. The most horrible part about all of this is if it is true, he got away with it. He never even got a slap on the wrist.”

Dean was seeing nothing but red.  _ Of course, it actually happened. Of course, he got away with it. No one can touch that fucker! _ “His uncle, Lily’s dad, is a defense attorney. If he can get some of the Gotti’s out of a conviction, he can do the same for his nephew,” Dean hissed.  _ And I thought I could threaten him... _

Marvin sat up straight and took off his baseball cap. “Justice is served,” he scoffed.

“Mmm-hmm.”

The parking lot was starting to fill with the voices of all of the marching bands that had performed that night.

“Dean?”

Dean turned his attention back to Marvin after the distraction the herd of students brought him. “Yes?”

“Don’t let the knowledge of what Alastair did to Castiel affect how well you have been doing at turning your life around.”

_ Fucker deserves to die! Don’t tell me what to do with that waste of life. _

“I know you probably won’t listen to me, but I hope you will at least be honest with Castiel.”

Dean’s eyes widened in surprise. “What do you mean?”

Marvin shrugged. “You seem to be friendly with him. He has a right to know that you were once friends with Alastair.”

Dean looked down at his boots.

“It’s better for him to hear it from you than from someone else. Especially if you’re trying to be friends with him.”

Dean nodded his head as he rubbed his hands together between his legs. “You’re right. Just gotta figure out a way to say it,” he laughed.

“You will,” Marvin smiled.

Students started to board the bus.

“It was great talking to you, Marvin,” Dean smiled back.

“Same here, Dean.”

Anna walked by them, then Cas followed.

“See ya later.” 

Dean got up from the front seat and made his way back to where he sat on the way to Hofstra. The kid with the Harry Potter glasses was already leaning up against the window in the seat across from Cas. Dean turned towards Castiel and let his gaze drift over him for a moment.  _ God, you really are beautiful.  _ He realized how wrong this would look from an outsider’s point of view and decided to say something. “You two look exhausted.”

Castiel peeked one eye open at Dean. “Yup.” Just as soon as he opened his eye it was closed again.

Dean laughed.  _ I kinda adore this guy… uh-oh. _

 

>>>>>>

 

Everyone was walking on air when the performance was done. They wouldn’t find out at the festival itself who had won, but they knew after watching everyone else that they were definitely one of the best.

The walk to the bus, after the final two schools performed, was one of Castiel’s favorite parts of Hofstra. Andy, every year, would start to play the beat of “The Hey Song”. Other people from the brass section would join in with him as the Kickline and Color Guard would start to clap along to the beat of the song. Only then would Andy start to scream over the bunch to get them to scream along with him. In past years, Jo, Charlie, Castiel, and Anna, would end up screaming their voices hoarse to the point where they could hardly be understood or heard for the rest of the night and into the next day. This year, they decided to speak rather than scream the words.

By the time everyone had made it back to the bus, their second winds had started to fade away and they were dead tired. Castiel and Anna said goodbye to Charlie and Jo as they entered their bus, then almost crawled onto their own bus as they made their way to their seat.

Anna put her head up against the window and closed her eyes as she hugged her oboe to her chest. “Another amazing year at Hofstra,” she said with a smile.

Castiel leaned his head on the back of the seat and closed his eyes. “Understatement.”

“You two look exhausted.”

Castiel opened one of his eyes and looked up at Dean. “Yup,” he confirmed and closed his eye again.

“We’re back to the one-word answers again, I see,” Dean chuckled.

Castiel heard Dean take his seat in the spot across from him. “Tired.”

“Sorry. I have no way of fixing that,” Dean continued with a soft laugh.

“Didn’t ask you to fix it,” Castiel stated as he sat up straight and faced Dean. “Did you enjoy the show? You disappeared after we performed.”

Dean chortled. “Yeah, I had a date with Marvin up there,” Dean said as he nodded his head in the direction of the bus driver. “He used to be my old bus driver. He’s a good guy.”

“Well, you didn’t miss anything by leaving early, so no biggie,” Castiel said with a shrug.

“Yeah, but you missed me,” Dean said with a salacious grin.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Oh, yes. It was horrible. I nearly died from the pain of your absence. How dare you leave me?” His voice was laced with sarcasm.

Dean threw his hand on his chest, feigning offense. “You slay me with your words.”

Castiel huffed out a laugh and gave him Dean a crooked grin. “We are hopeless,” Castiel whispered.

“What?” Dean asked.

_ Grow a pair of balls for once and take what you want!  _ “Can I have your number?”

Dean’s eyes widened before he smiled. “You want my number, Cas?”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Well, if you’re going to be a dick about it then no.”

Dean gave Castiel a panicked expression and shook his head. “No! It’s not…” He looked up and huffed out a breath before his eyes fell back on Castiel. “You know I’m not great at this crap. What I meant to say was I was actually going to ask you for yours tonight.”

Castiel tilted his head. “Really?”

“Yeah. I think it should be beyond obvious that I like you.”

“A few people have pointed out that fact to me, yes,” Castiel said as his smile started to grow wider.

“So, can I have your number?”

Castiel held out his hand. “Give me your phone.”

Dean smiled as he took out his phone. He tapped the screen a few times before he handed it over to Castiel.

Castiel typed in his number and then added his name to Dean’s contacts before he hit the call button. An instrumental version of “Come Together” started to play as soon as Castiel’s phone started to ring.

“Huh. Not the song I was expecting.”

“What song were you expecting?” Castiel asked.

Dean shrugged. “I was thinking maybe their earlier work. ‘Twist and Shout,’ ‘I Wanna Hold Your Hand,’ ‘And Your Bird Can Sing,’ ‘Ticket to Ride,’ something like that.”

Castiel arched an eyebrow at Dean. “Sorry to disappoint. I actually wanted ‘Happiness is a Warm Gun,’ but they didn’t have it on Zedge. So, I settled on my second favorite Beatles song.”

The look of sheer shock on Dean’s face was almost comical. “‘Happiness is a Warm Gun’ is your favorite Beatles song?”

“Why is everyone so surprised when I tell them that?” Castiel smacked his right hand on his thigh.

“Just, I don’t know. Darker than I would expect.”

“I think the lyrics are intense and the music matches the depths of John’s words. Just think about the level of lust and desire you would have to have for someone to write words like that. ‘When I hold you in my arms. And I feel my finger on your trigger. I know nobody can do me no harm.’ The idea of having that level of passion for someone to the point that they become your own personal drug of choice. I don’t know… it speaks to me for some reason…”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed and the corners of his lips turned down as he contemplated Castiel’s words. “Huh… I always thought it was about drugs.”

Castiel huffed out a laugh. “Shows how much you know about the Beatles.”

Dean smiled. “Touché.”

“John wrote the song about Yoko. The title actually came from the cover of a gun magazine George showed him.”

Dean bounced his head. “Interesting. I really thought all these years that it was about drugs.”

“‘Octopus's Garden’ was written while Ringo was high,” Castiel laughed.

“Now, that I believe,” Dean laughed. “No offense. Ringo was not the best musician. I’m surprised they even let him write that one.”

“Well, not every drummer can be the infamous John Bonham, can they?” Castiel questioned.

“John Bonham was in a class all his own. What people do with a double bass drum, that guy did with a regular bass drum. The little accents he would throw in. The way he would link in with Page. The syncopation of his rhythm has been… What?” 

Castiel was giving Dean a crooked smile as he listened to him ramble off all of the reasons why John Bonham was the best drummer in Rock and Roll history. “You’re funny.”

Dean gave Castiel a heart-stopping grin. “I’m adorable,” he winked.

Castiel rolled his eyes as Dean started to laugh.

They spent the rest of the bus ride home talking about music. Castiel wasn’t aware that the song “All of my Love” was written by Robert Plant in memory of his son, Karac, who died from a stomach virus at the age of five. Just as Dean was not aware that “Something” was written for George Harrison’s wife, Pattie Boyd. They went back and forth like that until the bus pulled into the school parking lot. 

As Castiel was packing up his oboe in the band room, Dean walked up behind him. “Cas?”

Castiel peeked over his shoulder to give Dean a quick glance. “Yes?”

“What are you doing next Saturday?”

He stopped disassembling his oboe and faced Dean. “Meg is having a Halloween party which I have been ordered to go to under pain of death. Why?”

“Oh,” Dean’s hand shot up to rub the back of his neck.

_ Is that a nervous habit or something? Cause it’s adorable. _

“I was gonna ask if you wanted to maybe grab a bite to eat and see a movie with me. I figured it would kind of be a way to celebrate the final home game of the season. But I understand.” Dean’s hand dropped from the back of his neck and ended up in his front pocket.

Castiel’s eyes widened.  _ Meg, I am going to kill you for making me go to your fucking party! _ “I can see if I can get out of it.”

Dean waved Castiel off. “Nah, it’s fine. You should go. One of the final high school house parties and all that. Next year, they’ll be college house parties. Which is completely different.”

Castiel tilted his head. “How so?”

“People in college can usually buy alcohol. So, there’s less stress involved when it comes to planning one of those,” Dean answered while he nodded his head.

“Makes sense.”

Dean’s gaze drifted off towards his boots. “Yup.”

They stood in silence for a moment. “I’m free the next day.”

Dean’s eyes locked with Castiel’s. “What?”

“I’m free next Sunday,” Castiel stated with a smile.

Dean mirrored Castiel expression. “Really?”

Castiel rolled his eyes and chuckled. “Yes. Really.”

“Awesome.”

Castiel beamed at Dean. His face started to hurt from how much he’d been smiling that day.

“I’ll text you later with the time that I’ll come over to pick you up.” Dean did an awkward two-step until he decided to give Castiel a pat on the back. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Cas”

“Goodbye, Dean.”

“Night, Cas,” he smiled brightly at Castiel as he backed away towards Mr. Davies and Mr. Turner’s office.

Anna walked up to Castiel. “I go to the bathroom for five minutes and you’re getting asked out.”

Castiel nodded and then took out his cell phone.

**Castiel: Looks like we both got what we wanted tonight.**

Castiel received a response back a lot faster than he thought.

**Charlie: And how’s that?**

**Castiel: I got a date with Dean next Sunday night :)**

**Charlie: WHY DO I HAVE TO BE ON MY WAY HOME!?!?!?**

**Charlie: DETAILS! NOW!**

**Castiel: As soon as I get home. I think my mom’s here.**

**Charlie: You better!**

Castiel smiled as he locked up his case. He gave Anna a hug and said he would see her the next day. He walked out to the parking lot and hopped into his mom’s car.

“You guys did amazing!” she exclaimed as she gave him a kiss on the cheek. She gave him a once-over. “What are you so smiley about?”

“I have a date next weekend…”

Becky’s eyebrows raised and her eyes widened. “With who?”

“Dean.”

“Dean who?”

“Winchester.”

“Am I going to be meeting this boy first?” She asked her facial expression hidden by the darkness of the night.

“Of course. He’s going to be picking me up from the house.”

They sat in silence.

_ Can we turn on a light or something? It is making me feel really uncomfortable that I can’t see your face. _

Before he could turn his thoughts into words Becky answered. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay.” She put the car in drive and exited the parking lot so they could head home.

_ Okay... _

 

>>>>>>

 

“Dean! Just the man I wanted to see!”

Dean sat down in front of Mick. “Thought I’d come and say goodbye before I head home.”

“I appreciate it,” he smiled. “However, I do have something I’d like to discuss with you.”

_ Remember what I said, dick. I’m blaming you for this! _ “Okay? What would you like to discuss?”

“Well, I wanted to see if you’d be able to make it to Disney this year.”

A weight had been lifted off of Dean’s shoulders.  _ Okay. We’re good. _

“Ellen received an email from Disney. They said that they would be delighted to have us back in February. They’ve invited both the Marching Band and Orchestra this year,” Mick’s smile was bursting with pride. “Now, I know that you have an extreme case of Aviophobia, but…”

“Aviophobia?”

“Fear of flying.”

Dean nodded in understanding.

“As I was saying. You have no real reason for being there. Especially since you will no longer be a student teacher by then. Still, we would be thrilled if you could join us.”

_ Orchestra has been invited? That means Sammy… _ “Well, you’re wrong about one thing.”

Mick’s eyebrows raised in question.

“Sam is in Orchestra. I have a reason, besides loving this Marching Band, to be there. So, I’m in,” Dean said with a huge grin.

“Excellent!” Mick clapped his hand in excitement. “Rufus told me I was completely bonkers for even bothering to ask.”

Dean laughed. “Rufus said ‘bonkers’?”

Mick waved him off as he leaned back in his chair. “Of course not. He said something completely crass. It’s my job to clean up whatever bits n’ bobs come out of that nutter’s mouth,” he laughed.

“Well… At least you have a system, I guess,” Dean said with a shrug.

Mick snapped his fingers and pointed at Dean. “Exactly!”

Dean stood up and rubbed his palms on the thighs of his jeans. “Anyway, I’m gonna go home. I’ll see you tomorrow, Mick.”

“Of course!” Mick stood up and shook Dean’s hand. “You’ve done brilliantly, Dean! Keep up the good work. I will see you tomorrow morning.”

“Night, Mick,” Dean waved goodbye to Mick as he left the office. He made his way towards the band room exit that leads straight to the parking lot where he knew he would find his Baby.

“Where do you think you’re going, you little shit?”

Dean shook his head. “I’m going home, Rufus. I have to be here early tomorrow. Just like you.”

“I have to talk to you.”

Dean pointed his thumb towards the office. “Mick already did. He told me about Disney. I said I would go.”

“Oh…” Rufus paused. “Huh. I thought for sure you would have said no. Considering the way you freaked out on the way to Disney back in 2014, I kinda thought you’d say no this time.” He pointed a finger at Dean. “You owe me fifty bucks.”

Dean screwed up his face. “What!? Why!?”

“I bet that you wouldn’t go and I lost,” Rufus answered with a stern expression.

“So, now I owe you money for not making the decision you wanted me to make? In what world does that make sense?”

“Mine!”

“Rufus, you tosser, let the boy go home. He doesn’t owe you a bloody thing. You lost! Alright? Fair and square! Now pay up.” Mick beamed as he held out his hand in wait for the money he was owed.

Rufus took his wallet out of his back pocket and opened it to take out some bills. “I only have sixty. You got change?” he asked as he looked up at Mick.

“I have two tens,” Dean interjected.

“Oh, now you have money?” Rufus snarked.

“I said that I didn’t owe you money. That in no way implies that I’m broke,” Dean chuckled.

Rufus slapped a twenty in Dean’s hand. 

After shaking out his hand, Dean handed one ten to Rufus and then the other ten to Mick. “Everyone settled now?” Dean asked.

“Yes!” Mick and Rufus said in unison.

Dean laughed at the scowl Rufus was wearing as he watched Mick fold the money into his wallet with delight. “Can I go home?”

“Of course, Dean. We’ll see you in the morning,” Mick answered with a wide grin.

Dean left the band room before the two of them could delay him any further.  _ God, I just wanna go home alr… _

“Dean!”

_ Oh, what the hell now?  _ Dean turned himself around exaggeratedly. “What!?”

Jo meandered over to Dean with a huge smile. “Someone’s in a hurry to leave!”

“Yeah, because I got shit to do,” Dean groaned.

“Uh-huh…” Jo arched an eyebrow at Dean as she smirked.

Dean rolled his eyes. “What do you want, Jo?”

“Charlie texted me. Told me you asked Castiel out.”

_ Bunch of gossips.  _ “Yeah? And?”

“Don’t hurt him.”

Dean’s face sobered. “I won’t.”

“Good. I don’t want to lose you,” Jo stated with all sincerity.

Dean chortled. “How would you lose me?”

Jo tilted her head as she shrugged. “Cause if you hurt him, you’re dead.”

“Why? Because you’d kill me?” Dean asked with an incredulous tone.

“No. Charlie will,” Jo replied with haunting honesty.

Dean’s eyes widened. “Charlie will kill me?”

“Yup,” she deadpanned.

Dean huffed. “Huh… Good to know.”

“Yeah. My girlfriend is a serious badass,” Jo said with a crooked smile.

“Dawwww! Awen’t you cute,” Dean teased.

Jo punched him on his arm.

“Fuck, Jo!! You gotta stop doing that!” Dean yelled.

“Don’t be an ass and I won’t have to!” She hollered back.

They glared at one another for a brief moment.

“Okay. Break it up you two!” Ellen raised her voice at the two of them. “I will not ask you again.”

“She star…”

“I’m finishing it!” Ellen barked as she interrupted Dean.

“But he wa…”

“Joanna Beth Harvelle, I swear, if you don’t get in the truck right now, so help me!” Ellen warned as she pointed towards the 2014 Chevy Silverado 1500.

Dean winced as he glanced over at Jo.  _ Full name… shit. Get in the car! _

Jo rolled her eyes as she stomped off towards Ellen’s pickup.

Ellen turned to Dean with a scowl. “Go home, Dean. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Goodnight, Ellen.”

Ellen waved goodbye and followed Jo to her truck.

When Dean was finally inside of the Impala, he closed his eyes and let his head fall back in relief for a little while.  _ What a day… _ He grinned.

Once the moment had passed, he sat up, put his Baby in drive, and left the school parking lot.

 

>>>>>>

 

**Charlie: Awww, Castiel!!! I’m so happy for you!!! This is so amazing!!! We should totally go on double dates!!!!**

**Castiel: Dean and I haven’t gone a date by ourselves yet. Why on earth would we go on a double date before we go out on our first date?**

**Charlie: I don’t know. We could make it a thing. I could schedule Jo and my first date next Sunday and we would just so happen to show up to where ever you guys go.**

**Castiel: Okay… since when do we live in a RomCom?**

**Charlie: Hey! People plan shit out like that in real life too!**

**Castiel: I am not having my first date with Dean with the two of you. It’s just not happening, Charlie. I’m sorry.**

**Charlie: :‘(**

**Charlie: Meanie.**

**Castiel: Is it truly so hard to understand why I don’t want my first date to be a double date?**

**Charlie: No. I’m just busting your balls :D**

**Castiel: Sometimes I hate you.**

**Charlie: Yeah, but you’ll always love me <3**

**Castiel: You know it!**

**Charlie: Night, Bestie <3**

**Castiel: Goodnight, Charlie :)**

Castiel set his alarm, plugged his phone in, and then locked the screen. He put his hands behind his head and stared off into space as he let his mind wander over the events of the day. When the day started, he had no idea that by the end of the night he would have Dean’s number and a date planned for the twenty-ninth.

Just as he was starting to doze off his phone started to quack next to him. He checked the time.  _ 11:17 pm? No one but Charlie texts me this late. _

He unlocked his phone and hit his text message icon to see who was messaging him.

**Dean: Hiya, Cas.**

Castiel’s eyes widened in shock.  _ Already? Don’t people usually wait or something? _

**Dean: Are you still up?**

**Castiel:** **Hello, Dean. I was just starting to doze off.**

**Dean: Oh…**

**Dean: I’m sorry.**

**Castiel: It’s okay.**

_ More than okay.  _ Castiel’s entire body was buzzing with excitement.

**Castiel: Is there something you’d like to talk about?**

Castiel watched in wait as the three little dots in the bottom left corner danced up and down, letting him know Dean was still typing his message.  _ Is he writing a friggin novel or something? _

**Dean: Well I said I would message you later with details. Like what we’re doing. Time and place and junk.**

**Castiel: The date is not for another week, Dean.**

**Dean: Well… I’m excited.**

Castiel’s breath hitched.

**Castiel: Me, too :)**

**Dean: Awesome!**

**Dean: I was thinking dinner and a movie. Blade Runner 2049 came out two weeks ago. I kinda wanna go see it.**

**Dean: Did you ever watch the original?**

_ Do you not remember what Anna said earlier. _

**Dean: Kind of a stupid question. Isn’t it. The answer is probably a no. Lol**

**Castiel: I was about to say… Lol**

**Dean: I’ll bring you my copy tomorrow. You cannot see the new movie without seeing the original first.**

**Dean: What would you want for dinner?**

**Castiel: Which theater would we be going to?**

**Dean: I was thinking either Island 16 or Regal 9. I’m kinda leaning towards Regal. Lounge seating just is too awesome to pass up.**

**Castiel: I agree.**

**Castiel: Most of the restaurants nearby are fast food or chains. I enjoy IHOP. Friendly’s has some decent burgers and awesome Ice Cream Sundays. Then, of course, there is always Little Vincent’s.**

**Dean: I can do Friendly’s… but that one is kind of small.**

**Dean: We could always drive to the Airport Diner. They’ve got some killer burgers.**

**Castiel: Very true. If you don’t mind driving that is.**

**Dean: Have you seen my car?**

**Dean: Trust me. I never mind driving. Lol**

**Castiel: Yes I have seen your car. It’s gorgeous. You take excellent care of it.**

**Dean: She’s my Baby. I gotta treat her with respect. She’s a lady after all.**

Castiel laughed out loud.

**Dean: I rebuilt her, she was scrap before I got to her.**

**Castiel: Well, you obviously did an incredible job.**

**Dean: Thank you :D**

**Castiel: Not that I’m not enjoying this conversation and all, but we should both go to sleep. I have school and you have work in the morning.**

**Dean: If you say so :(**

**Castiel: *rolls eyes* Go to bed, Dean.**

**Dean: See you tomorrow morning?**

**Castiel: Of course.**

**Dean: Good! I’ll be the one slamming the auditorium doors open and making you *squirm* ;)**

Castiel rolled his eyes.  _ Of course, he would say that… _

**Castiel: I wouldn’t expect anything else. Goodnight, Dean.**

**Dean: Later, Cas :)**

Castiel locked the screen to his phone for the final time that night then made himself comfortable. He knew he would be exhausted the next day. All things considered, after the day he had, he didn’t care how tired he was going to be. Every single thing that had happened would be worth it.

_ I’m gonna need coffee tomorrow... _


	16. Chapter Sixteen

To say Dean was happy would have been an understatement. He spent most of the night tossing and turning with excitement. The date was still over a week away, but there was a date set and that was what mattered.

When his alarm went off the next morning, he nearly sprinted out of his bed to get ready. He wanted to surprise Cas with breakfast, so he set his alarm for 5:45 a.m. that way he could make a stop at Strathmore before he went to the school.

After his teeth were gleaming and his hair was styled to perfection, Dean took extra care in getting dressed. He stood in front of his closet for five minutes before he settled on a powder blue collared shirt, the gray slacks he knew Cas loved, and black leather belt with shoes to match. Once he made sure he had packed the “Blade Runner” DVD, he grabbed his bag, guitar, and keys, then walked outside to his Baby.

The early morning sun had not even begun to rise as Dean left his driveway and headed to his favorite bagel shop. Being that it was only six, the roads were still fairly empty. The only thing he ever had to wait for in the mornings was the LIRR. While he waited for the train to go by, he reached under his front seat to choose a cassette from the box he kept there. He blindly selected one, then put it in the tape deck of the Impala. It never really mattered which one he took out of the box, he knew he would love it. “In the Evening” started to sound through the car as the railroad crossing cleared and the light turned green. _I’m never not in a Zeppelin mood, “In Through The Outdoor” will do._

Strathmore’s parking lot was already filling up with cars when Dean pulled in. It only opened ten minutes before he arrived, but it was one of the most popular bagel shops in the area, so the fact that there was already a line was no surprise. As he was standing in line, he already knew what he should order for everyone. Still, for some reason, Cas’ order was causing him a little bit of indigestion.

 _Should I text him and ask him whether or not he wants coffee or tea today? If he does want tea, what kind should I get him? There are fifteen different types of tea up there!!!!_ _He did look tired yesterday. We were texting until late last night. Maybe this is one of those random coffee mornings? Or should I get him one tea and one coffee? How does he take his tea? Is he going to think it’s weird that I’m bringing him food? Maybe I shouldn’t get him anything…_

By the time he had left Strathmore, he had a large cup of hot water with three different types of tea Cas could choose from, a coffee extra light, and a bag of cream and sweeteners. _I need two extra hands just to carry what I got for Cas._

When he got to the school, he kicked the door to get Ellen’s attention.

Ellen looked at Dean’s hands and snickered as she opened the door. “Throwing a party or something?”

“Haha, very funny,” he snarked. He walked into her office and put down the bags and two drink carriers onto her desk. “I got you a coffee and muffin. You still like blueberry, right?”

Ellen gave Dean a wide grin. “Yes. I do.”

“Good. I also got stuff for Bobby and Sam. I told them to come here to get their breakfast,” he explained as he put a sandwich and a fruit salad onto her desk. When he finished separating all of the items, he turned to Ellen. “What?”

Ellen was giving him a knowing smile. “That’s a lot of drinks and food. You only feeding you?”

Dean narrowed his eyes at her. “Maybe?”

“Uh-huh…” She walked over to Dean and put the metal carabiner that held the keys to the lighting booth onto one of his belt loops. “Why don’t you leave that stuff on my desk, go grab your guitar, and play for a bit. Then you can bring Castiel his breakfast.”

“Jo told you, huh?”

Ellen arched an eyebrow at Dean. “Hun, you come in here today looking all dapper and shit, with a bag of gifts I might add, and you think Jo is the one who told me something?” she asked.

Dean put the drink carrier and bag of food back onto her desk and sat down. “I’m that obvious?”

Ellen laughed as she nodded her head vigorously. “In a big way.”

Dean put his head in his hands. “Fuck!” he started to shake his head. “I really like him, Ellen,” he admitted as he sat up straight and ran his right hand down the length of his face. “I like him to the point of where I’m stupid about shit. Last night...” He put his head back into his hands. “I was so inappropriate. I was shocked when Rufus and Mick didn’t corner me when we got back to the high school.”

“You can thank me for that, by the way.”

Dean looked up at Ellen, dumbfounded. “What?”

She shook her head and chuckled. “I saw you and distracted the two of them with the Disney email. I was going to wait until today to talk to them about it. Your behavior kinda put me between a rock and a hard place.”

“Oh, shit! You see what I mean?! You shouldn’t have had to do that for me!” he whined.

“No. I shouldn’t. Even though you weren’t technically on the clock, you were still working.”

 _Good thinking genius. You almost kissed him, too._ “I am so sorry, Ellen.”

She gave Dean a gentle smile. “Well, you didn’t do anything horribly inappropriate. Just don’t make me cover for you again and we’ll be okay.”

“I’ll try. I can’t promise anything when it comes to him, for some reason, but I’ll try,” he admitted.

Ellen sat down next to Dean and put a hand on his shoulder. “You have to do more than try, Dean. Being caught with a student…” Ellen took a deep breath. “I don’t want to fire you, but I will have to if you cross that line.”

Dean’s face fell. “I have a date with him next Sunday.”

Ellen nodded in understanding. “Well, the most I can say is try not to do anything untoward while you’re in public. At least not right now. Wait until after your final day.”

Dean looked up at the clock. He knew Cas would be arriving at the school soon. He took the metal carabiner off of his belt loop and handed Ellen back her keys. “I’m not going to need them today.” He stood up and picked up the drink carrier and bags. “Thanks, Ellen.”

“No problem, Dean.” She gave Dean a doleful smile. “I know it sucks, but you have a job to do. You’re not a student here anymore. You’re a teacher.”

“I know.” He waved goodbye as he made his way to the auditorium.

He sat at the edge of the stage, then took out his cell phone after he put everything down.

**Dean: Meet me in the auditorium. The backstage door is unlocked.**

 

>>>>>>

 

“Castiel,” Gabriel snapped as he barged into the bathroom. “Do you have something you’d like to tell me?”

Castiel finished rinsing the soap off of his face before he spoke. “First thing that comes to mind is 'good morning'. I am inclined to think that is not what you meant.”

“You have a date with Dean next Sunday?!?!”

 _Ugh, mom…_ “Yes.”

“Why?!”

Castiel huffed in annoyance. “Because he asked me and I said yes.” 

“Why?!”

“Because I want to!” Castiel barked.

“Are you hard of hearing or something?!?! Did you not hear me when I told you he is a serious dick?!?!” Gabriel all but yelled his question.

“Gabriel, I am already running late as it is this morning. Can you wait and yell at me later?” Castiel growled.

“You think this is yelling? I’m not yelling. Do you **want** to hear me yell?” Gabriel inquired with fury.

“Right now, no,” Castiel retorted. “Right now, I would like to finish my shower and get ready for school. You are prolonging the process by being overly combative about something that is not due to happen for another week. Now, if you don’t mind, I would like to finish my shower in peace!”

“This isn’t over, Castiel. We’re going to have a serious conversation about your dreadful decision-making capabilities.”

“Well, again, until then, can I finish taking my fucking shower!” Castiel hollered.

Gabriel exited the bathroom with a slam of the door.

 _Brilliant_ _! A_ _bsolutely perfect!_

Castiel finished his shower and dried himself off. After he brushed his teeth and put on his clothing, he tried to put his contacts in and failed miserably. The right contact fell to the floor and disappeared. _Ugh, seriously!_ He quickly went into his room and grabbed his glasses from his nightstand. When he went to put some product in his hair , he realized he was out of pomade. The only thing he had was some gel that had been sitting in the cabinet for God knows how long. He decided to say fuck it and skipped styling altogether. _I already look like shit, so might as well just add to the list of crap that has gone wrong so far today._

When he got upstairs, he saw his bus was already pulling up in front of his house. He didn’t have time to say goodbye to anyone, let alone eat. He slammed the door behind him, then ran to the bus.

As he walked through the front doors of the school, his phone started to vibrate in his pocket.

**Dean: Meet me in the auditorium. The backstage door is unlocked.**

_Why is he texting me to come to the auditorium?_

**Castiel: Okay…?**

Castiel opened another text to tell Charlie he wouldn’t be meeting her at their usual spot, then made his way to the auditorium.

As he walked into the dark of the backstage, he didn’t know what to expect. When he saw Dean sitting at the edge of the stage with his legs dangling over the front of it, he smiled.

Dean must have heard him enter because as soon as he was about five feet from him, he got up and turned around. “Hiya, Cas. I got you…” He took one look at Castiel and his mouth fell agape. “I…” he coughed. “I didn’t know you wear glasses.”

 _Crap! I look like shit. Why did he have to ask me to meet him today?_ Castiel gave Dean a once-over. _HOW IS IT FAIR THAT HE ALWAYS LOOKS LIKE A GREEK GOD!!!!_ “Yeah, I uh… I switched to contacts last year,” he explained as he looked at the ground. “I know I look…”

“Fucking hot!”

Castiel looked up and raised his eyebrows. “Pardon?”

Dean cleared his throat. “What I mean is, um… I like you in glasses.”

Castiel tilted his head. “Are you feeling okay? Did you suffer a brain injury or something? I look like shit today.”

Dean laughed nervously. “We obviously have differing opinions of what shit looks like.”

Castiel waved a hand over himself. “This is shit.” He turned to Dean and waved his hand over him. “That is hot.”

Dean’s face turned a rosy pink. “Again. Difference of opinion.”

Castiel shook his head. “Anyway, you got me what?”

“What?”

“When I walked in here, you greeted me, then said you got me something.”

Realization hit Dean. “Oh, right, yeah,” he chuckled. “I got you a bagel the way you like it. Also, I didn’t know whether today would be a tea or coffee kind of day, so I got you both.”

Castiel prayed to whoever was listening that Dean would not see the hearts which were probably extremely visible in his eyes. “You got me breakfast?”

Dean’s entire face lit up. “Yeah.”

Castiel flung his arms around Dean. “Thank you!”

Just like the night before, as soon as he put his hands on Dean, he began to regret his decision. He felt Dean’s strong arms wrap around him. One arm was holding him between his shoulder blades, the other was around his lower back. The warmth of Dean’s hands was searing into his skin through his shirt. He shivered from the heat of their touch. Dean’s head fell into the crook of Castiel’s neck. He followed Dean’s lead. _God_ _,_ _he smells amazing._

Dean pulled back and looked at Castiel. His eyes laser-focused on his lips.

Castiel took a deep breath and swallowed hard. _Please…_

After a few more moments, Dean shook his head and stepped away. “I’m sorry.”

Castiel tilted his head. “Um… Okay? Why?”

“You’re coffee and tea are getting cold.” He cleared his throat and looked at his watch. “I should probably head to Mick and Rufus’ office. I am at work after all…” he trailed off.

Castiel bowed his head. “I’m sorry.”

“Why are you sorry?” Dean asked.

Castiel stole a quick glance at Dean. “That must have been wildly inappropriate for the workplace, especially since I’m a student.”

“Unfortunately… yes. Ellen already spoke to me this morning about my behavior,” Dean confessed.

Castiel gazed over at the drink carrier and bags before he faced Dean. “Is that why you decided to give me my breakfast in here?”

He nodded. “Yes.”

“I see,” Castiel stated as he looked back at his breakfast. “Maybe we should cancel next Sunday. I don’t want to get you in trouble.”

“What?!” Dean asked with astonishment. “No!”

“Dean, think about it. You're a teacher. I’m a student. There is still a serious taboo when it comes to student/teacher relationships. Plus, regardless of the fact that a vast majority of the world has come to accept homosexual relationships, the fact that we are two men will make it worse.” _I literally want to punch myself in the face right now for saying all of this._

“No,” Dean shook his head. “I’m not letting that stop me.”

“Dean, honestly, stop thinking about this,” he pointed between the two of them, “for a moment and think about your future. I am not worth you throwing your entire career away.”

“Says who?”

“Says me.”

Dean put both hands on the back of his head and started to pace up and down the stage. When he finally stopped, he balled his fists at his sides and was breathing erratically. “No. I can’t cancel next Sunday.”

“You can and you will.”

Dean walked up to Castiel and stopped himself from reaching out to touch him. “No.”

“Fine.” He held Dean’s gaze.

He saw the weight lift off of Dean’s shoulders as he took a deep breath.

 _Castiel… Don’t do it._ “I’m canceling.” _You’re a fucking moron._

Dean’s face fell. He bowed his head. “Don’t. Please, don’t.”

“Dean, I…”

The warning bell rang. Dean looked up at Castiel. “Don’t cancel yet. Please think about it first.”

“Dean, I’ve already…”

“No. You haven’t.” Dean looked around quickly. He grabbed Castiel’s hand and dragged him over to where one of the curtains were pulled back.

“Why the…”

Without warning, Dean grabbed both sides of Castiel face and crushed their lips together.

Castiel thought his kiss with Aaron was spectacular. Even after everything that happened after they kissed by the piano in eighth grade, he still dreamt about that kiss. Evidently, he had been completely wrong.

The kiss was merely PG, but the fire that spread through his veins at the touch of Dean’s lips on his was akin to a forest fire in the heat of summer. The shock of the initial touch was lost within the matter of a second. Castiel lifted his right hand to the back of Dean’s neck and pulled him closer as he wrapped his arm around his lower back to push them closer together.

Dean’s hands moved down to Castiel’s lower back as he licked at his upper lip.

As soon as Castiel gave him an opening, the bell rang. They instantly separated as if the bell had burned them.

Castiel softly chuckled as he tried to catch his breath. “So…” he cleared his throat. “I’m definitely going to think about that.”

Dean leaned in and gave Castiel a lingering kiss. “Me, too,” he laughed.

Castiel went to the edge of the stage and picked up the drink carrier and bags. He handed the bag holding a sandwich wrapped in tinfoil to Dean as he grabbed a cup from the carrier.

“So, I’ll see you fifth period?” Dean asked.

“Yes. Of course.”

Dean leaned in and kissed him once again. “Awesome!”

Castiel walked towards the door opposite from the one he had initially walked in. “Goodbye, Dean.”

Dean was heading towards the other door. “Later, Cas.”

When Castiel walked into the shop, five minutes late, he was on another plane of existence. What just happened in the auditorium was not something that usually happened to Castiel. _What is it with me and auditoriums? Do guys just think “Yup, he needs to be kissed in here.”_

When he walked up to the workbench, Sam was already in the process of lifting the vehicle so they could get a look at the chassis. “Hey, Castiel. You’re ru…” He took one look at Castiel and glowered. “He did fucking not.”

“What?” Castiel questioned, feigning innocence.

Sam crossed his arms over his chest. “Don’t give me ‘what’ when you definitely know ‘what’ what is,” he admonished.

Castiel simply smiled. “Are we changing a couple of brake pads or what?”

Sam shook his head while maintaining his grimace. “Yeah… come on.” He continued to raise the vehicle as he muttered angrily.

Castiel definitely did not spend the rest of the morning thinking about that kiss.

 

>>>>>>

 

While Dean was in the bathroom checking on his appearance, he reluctantly threw out his breakfast. He knew if he showed up late with Strathmore and didn’t have anything for Mick and Rufus, he would be in more trouble than he probably already was.

When the swelling of his lips started to recede, and he was able to keep the smile from his face for more than fifteen seconds, Dean left the bathroom, then went to the band room. He looked down at his watch. _Fuck, it’s 7:35?!_ _What the fuck am I gonna tell them?!_ When he opened the door and entered their office, Rufus and Mick were nowhere to be seen. _Where the fuck are they?!_

He sat in front of their desk for what felt like an eternity until he heard the band room doors open and close.

Mick entered first with a wide grin. “Ah, Dean. I trust you haven’t been waiting there long. We just got out of a meeting with Principal Roman.”

Rufus followed closely after. “That man sure likes to hear himself talk. We were in there for over forty minutes!”

Dean scowled. _I threw out my breakfast for absolutely no reason._

“So, how long have you been sitting here?” Mick asked.

Dean looked up at the clock on the wall. _It’s 7:45. If Principal Roman was just talking to them for over forty minutes, you have your excuse. Lie your fucking pants off._ “I’ve actually been sitting here for about thirty minutes. I didn’t know where you two were, so I figured it was better to just stay put.”

Mick’s face sobered. “Oh… I am truly sorry, Dean. I was not aware of the time. We were preoccupied with discussing Disney with Mr. Roman.”

Dean waved Mick off. “It’s no big deal. I’m here to help you guys out anyway. I don’t mind waiting.” _You’re also lying to their faces right now_ _,_ _too, so there’s that._ “What did you guys talk about?”

For the next fifteen minutes, they discussed what Disney entailed. Principal Roman apparently stated there was not enough money in the school's budget to cover most of the trip. _Band candy it is._ When the bell rang at a little after eight, Mick, Rufus, and Dean shelved their Disney discussion for later.

In between periods one and two, Dean took out his cell phone and shot a quick text to Cas. He knew as his thumbs typed out his message his face was plastered with a goofy smile, but he couldn’t find it in him to truly care. _Having his number is going to be a problem. If I had a problem staying away from him before, being able to talk to him anytime I want…_

**Dean: Didn’t walk into the band room until around 7:35. Had to throw out my breakfast because I was worried about showing up late with food. Turns out I was worried for no reason. They weren’t even in here.**

His fingers paused for a couple of seconds before he typed out the next message.

**Dean: Can’t wait to see you fifth period :***

After he hit send, he started to panic. _Is the kissy face going too far? Should I dial shit back a bit…_ He sat there staring at his phone until the bell rang, signaling morning announcements were about to start. He made sure his phone was on vibrate before he put it into his pocket. _Pull your shit together, Winchester. You’re still at work._

When his cell phone started to buzz in his pocket, he himself started to vibrate with excitement.

**Cas: I’m happy you didn’t get into trouble. That’s the last thing I want to happen.**

_Shit…_ He knew if Cas continued to worry about the whole student/teacher relationship thing, incredible kiss or not, he would still cancel. _Incredible is a serious understatement and you know it._ Even now, over forty minutes later, thinking about the electricity of that kiss was making him regret his choice in pants.

**Cas: Your brother’s face when I entered the shop, also late I might add, was priceless. He argued, ad nauseam, that I should know better and that you are a horrible influence on me.**

Dean laughed out loud, drawing a grimace from Rufus. _I should put my phone away._

**Cas: I can’t wait to see you fifth period either. ;)**

Dean couldn’t help but smile before he put his phone away. _I guess the kissy face wasn’t going too far…_

 

>>>>>>

 

The dopey grin Castiel wore for the rest of the morning was drawing more attention than he felt comfortable with. He knew most of the time he wore an expression of either mild interest or indifference around others. He just couldn’t help the smile that would not leave his face. _You’d think it’s a sin for me to be happy or something._

During their walk to music hallway after the fourth period, Samandriel commented on his behavior. “I don’t think I have seen you this way in… well, ever. What happened?”

Castiel shrugged. “Just in a good mood, I guess.”

“Well, whatever you’re doing, it’s infectious and I for one am loving it,” he smiled brightly.

When Castiel opened the music theory classroom door, his face instantly flushed and his heart started to race. He sat down in his usual spot and started to take out everything he needed for the class. When he saw the chair next to him move, he smiled down at the keys of his piano. He shook his head to clear it. _Don’t be obvious, Castiel. He could lose his job for this…_ His face fell. _You shouldn’t be doing this at all._

He couldn’t help the lustrous grin that lit up his face when he glanced over at Dean and saw his emerald eyes were smiling at him. “Hello, Dean.”

“Hiya, Cas,” Dean blushed.

“How has your morning been?” he inquired.

“Awesome,” he beamed. “Yours?”

“Spectacular,” he admitted as he looked down at his knotted fingers. “Dean,” he once again looked into Dean’s memorizing stare. _Stop looking at me like that._ “You do need to mind your behavior while we are around others.”

All of the color drained from Dean’s face. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I always seem to forget where I am when I’m around you.”

The admission caused his dick to take a slight interest in the conversation. He glared at his pants. _Down boy...I don’t want to hear a peep from you until we’re in the privacy of our room later tonight._

Mr. Turner decided the class was going to have a composition day. Usually that meant he wanted to spend time muttering over his paperwork.

“How long have you been playing the piano?” Dean asked while Mr. Turner was deeply engrossed in whatever he was going over.

“I started playing a little over a month before my third birthday.”

Dean’s eyebrows shot up to the ceiling with shock. “Really? Do you attend the NYSSMA evaluations every year, for piano?”

NYSSMA was the New York State School Music Association. Every spring they would evaluate different students throughout the state on their music capabilities. Castiel used to participate in the testing every year for piano. “No. The past four years I have attended them for oboe.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed with confusion. “Why not piano? If you’ve been playing the piano for almost fifteen years, I’m sure you’re more than capable at acing the exam.”

“Because I don’t,” Castiel grumbled.

Dean arched an eyebrow. “Do you play at all?”

Castiel went to open his mouth before Dean stopped him.

“I’m not talking about playing during this class. I’m talking about in your free time.”

“No,” Castiel deadpanned.

“Why not?” Dean asked with evident concern.

“I just don’t. I haven’t in years.”

“Well, that’s a shame.”

Castiel tilted his head at Dean. “Why? You’ve never heard me play. How would you know if I’m any good? Maybe I stopped playing because I’m abysmal.”

Dean shook his head. “I highly doubt it. Plus, I remember the conversation we had on the bus yesterday. I have a feeling, it was more than singing that you used to do in front of an audience.”

“If you recall, I remember you saying you were going to drop the subject,” Castiel grumbled.

“Well, if you remember that, I’m sure you remember I told you the past shouldn’t dictate what happens in your future,” Dean glared. His face softened almost instantly. “You should play again. If not in front of other people, at least when you’re alone. You’ll thank me for it.”

Castiel gave Dean a noncommittal nod of his head. _Don’t lie to yourself and say you haven’t been thinking it. You’ve been playing with the idea of taking it out from the closet across from your room for months. If not years._ “I’ll take that into consideration,”  Castiel mumbled.

“Good.”

The bell rang not too long after their uncomfortable conversation.

Dean stood up and surveyed what Castiel knew was a mournful expression. “I didn’t mean to pry, Cas.”

Castiel shook his head. “Don’t worry about it.” _Part of me knows you’re right._ “It doesn’t matter.”

Dean gave Castiel a doleful smile. “We both know that’s not true. This conversation obviously upset you.”

Castiel chuckled. “Shit happens, Dean. The past is the past. Eventually, I’ll get over it.”

“What happened?”

Castiel balled his fists at his sides. “Now, that is a subject I never wish to discuss. You either drop it or we’re going to have a problem.”

Dean’s eyes widened as he lifted his hands up in defense. “I’m sorry. I was just curious.”

“Well, satisfaction from this curiosity does not bring the proverbial cat back, so drop it,” Castiel hissed.

“Dean, get your ass over here. This crap is about to give me a migraine,” Mr. Turner interrupted.

_Thank God._

Dean turned his attention over to Mr. Turner. “I’ll be right there,” he replied. He studied Castiel before it was obvious he gave up whatever he was looking for. “I’ll see you later, Cas.”

“Bye, Dean.”

Dean opened the door for him. “I wish I could kiss you goodbye,” Dean said with an almost inaudible whisper.

Castiel turned around and blushed. “Now, that is just not fair,” he smiled.

“When have I ever been fair?” he asked with a wink.

Castiel rolled his eyes and made his way to the lunchroom. When he arrived at the mass of students crowding around the cafeteria door, Sam and Charlie were already there.

“Care to explain why I had to find out from Sam what happened this morning?” Charlie asked with her arms crossed over her chest.

 _Shit…_ “I’m sorry, Charlie. I… I don’t have an excuse.”

Charlie raised an eyebrow at Castiel. “Well, at least you're honest,” she said with a smile as she pulled him into a hug. “You better tell me everything!”

“Excuse me. Can that wait? I would prefer to not be mentally scarred by this conversation,” Sam groaned.

Charlie and Castiel chuckled as the lunchroom doors opened. They decided to put a pin in that conversation, to spare Sam’s mental well being.

 

>>>>>>

 

The amount of paperwork that went into planning something like the school’s trip to Disney was nothing short of daunting. Dean was not aware of how many forms had to be filled out, signed, notarized, and sent out to the entirety of the Marching Band, Kickline/Color Guard, and Orchestra. The trip wasn’t for a few months, but preparations for the event were going to take time, so they started early.

Dean spent most of the afternoon with either Rufus, Mick, or Ellen, going over everything. They needed to discuss everything which had to be done before they could make the announcement during the ninth period. The hardest part, besides the paperwork, was keeping what he knew about the trip to himself. He wanted to tell everyone they were invited back to Disney, but he knew Ellen saying she would castrate him if he opened his mouth was more of a promise than a threat.

Cas continued to message him throughout the day. On more than one occasion, he had to stop himself from mentioning what he was up to, especially when Cas asked him what Rufus was upset about before he left. Cas was evidently concerned about Dean’s future and what their currently pending relationship could do to it. Dean was not worried. Even though deep down he knew he probably should be. However, the more he thought about the way Cas felt in his arms, the little-surprised hiccup of his breath when they first kissed, and the drop dead sexy way his voice sounded after they separated, he couldn’t find it in himself to care.

By the time the ninth period arrived, Dean was itching to see Cas. Having the ability to text Cas helped, but it was hardly enough. When that mess of dark brown hair walked into the band room, he had to physically control his body’s need to leap out of his seat and wrap his arms around him. _Control yourself, man. Work, remember! Work!_

He loved the way Cas looked. His hair was definitely wilder than usual and looked soft to touch. He imagined running his hand through Cas’ hair, then giving it a little tug to hear what sort of sounds he could make. _Get your mind out of that gutter before we have a problem._ Not to mention , he looked like a sexy nerd with those Clark Kent glasses. _Okay, you’re cut off_ _,_ _mister!_

Instead of walking over to Cas, he decided to text him.

**Dean: Hey, good lookin’ ;)**

Dean watched as Cas took out his cell phone and read the message.

Cas narrowed his eyes at Dean before he saw him start to text back.

**Cas: Is it strictly necessary for you to text me things like that? You could just walk over here. You realize that, right?**

Dean could tell his disheartened expression made Cas regret his previous text.

**Dean: You know why I can’t…**

Cas read the text and nodded his head.

Dean watched as Cas’ fingers paused over the screen as he typed. When his phone finally vibrated in his hand, his heart dropped to the pit of his stomach.

**Cas: You realize if this continues, controlling our behavior is going to get harder.**

The pain he was feeling from seeing the word “if” was comparable to pouring lemon juice on a paper cut. It hurt like a bitch. Before he was able to respond, the bell rang. _Fuck my life!_

He spent the rest of the period, including when Mick announced Disney to the class, shaking his leg. He knew Cas was right. Ellen had already warned him she had no problem firing him, but she didn’t tell him to cancel. She just told him to watch himself while they’re in public. So far, he knew that was going to be a problem. _Maybe they’re right…_ Still, he refused to wait until after his final day at the school for things to happen with Cas. The past month and a half had been torture enough. The idea of prolonging things further was downright insane.

When the bell rang, Dean took out his phone and started to text Cas back. Before he could hit send, a shadow was hovering over him.

“Hello, Dean.”

Dean looked up into the smiling sapphire eyes he adored and couldn’t help but smile back. “Hey, Cas.”

“I’m not canceling yet. You told me to think. I’m still thinking,” he explained.

Dean let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. “You know telling me good news like that in front of a room filled with people is not fair, right?”

Cas shrugged. “I love seeing you **squirm** ,” he replied with a wicked grin.

Dean felt that response go straight to his dick. He narrowed his eyes at Castiel. “I really hate you right now.”

Castiel chuckled as he shook his head. “No. You really don’t.”

 _You’re right… Hate couldn’t be any further from the truth._ Instead of answering, Dean just smiled.

“I have to go to my bus. Talk to you later?” Castiel asked as he turned to leave.

“I don’t see why not.”

Castiel gave Dean one of his gummy smiles. “Goodbye, Dean.”

“Later, Cas.” _He’s gonna be the death of me._

 

>>>>>>

 

When Castiel got home, he went straight to the kitchen to talk to his mom.

“Hey, Hun! How was school?” Becky asked with a warm grin.

“Interesting,” he admitted. “Mom?”

“Yes?”

“Why did you tell Gabriel that I have a date with Dean?” Castiel inquired.

Becky furrowed her eyebrows. “I wasn’t aware it was an issue telling your brother who you plan on dating. Care to explain why it would be?”

“Gabriel isn’t particularly a huge fan of Dean,” Castiel responded with a sigh.

Becky smirked as she nodded her head. “A lot of people aren’t big fans of his, from what I gather.”

“What does that mean?” Castiel barked.

Becky’s scowled. “Castiel, he doesn’t have the best reputation. Ms. Moseley told me about him back at the beginning of September. He’s a flirt. Are you sure he’s not trying to manipulate you in some way?”

Castiel’s jaw dropped. _I cannot believe this._ “When have I ever been that stupid?”

“I never implied you're stupid. You are far from it and you know it. We just worry about you, Castiel. We don’t want you to get hurt,” Becky answered softly.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “I think I am more than capable of making my own decisions. I ignored him for over a month because I figured his behavior was merely an attempt to manipulate me. It’s not. He actually cares.”

“I trust you, Castiel. I just don’t trust what could happen. The monsters who run your school seem to constantly overlook the atrocities of the little demons who attend it. I will not… I cannot…” Becky’s breathing became labored as she started to sob. “I won’t let you get hurt again, Castiel. Do you even understand what it was like getting a call from Missouri that day? The fact that I wasn’t there to protect you? I WON’T LET THAT HAPPEN AGAIN!” she screamed.

Castiel bowed his head as he somberly approached his mom to comfort her. “I won’t let that happen again,” He stroked her hair as her tears started to stain his shirt. “I was naive, then. I expected the best from everyone. I’m not ignorant of the evil of this world anymore.”

“I know, but knowledge does not prevent them from killing you if they try again,” Becky muttered into his shirt.

Castiel let out a deep breath. “No. It doesn’t.”

Becky stepped away from Castiel and went to the sink, hiding whatever remaining tears she still had to shed.

“Alastair hasn’t harassed me in weeks because Dean said something.”

Becky turned around, eyes red and swollen. “What?”

“Alastair was harassing me at Homecoming, remember?”

Becky nodded her head. “Yeah, I remember. Someone walked over and said something then escorted you to the end zone.”

Castiel nodded. “That was Dean. He even said something to Alastair after the game. He told me no one deserves to be talked to that way. Least of all me.”

Becky’s eye widened in disbelief. “Alastair hasn’t said anything since? Not a word?”

“Every so often I see him giving me dirty looks, but that’s it,” Castiel answered with a shrug.

Becky nodded and turned back towards the sink.

Castiel started to walk down the stairs towards his room.

“I’m meeting him before you go out, right?” Becky asked as she hollered from the kitchen.

“Yes.”

“Good.”

Castiel couldn’t help but smile as he walked towards his room. He knew he would probably have a repeat of this conversation later on that night with Gabriel, but he knew he could handle it.

When he looked at the closet, that was across the hall from his room, he paused longer than usual. _Fuck ‘em._ He threw open the closet door and moved things around until his eyes fell upon one of many things he had been hiding from for four years. His Yamaha P-45 88 Key Electronic Keyboard. He lifted it with unsteady hands and carried it through his bedroom door before he carefully placed it next to his desk.

After he made sure everything was back in its place in the closet, Castiel entered his room and stared at the box. He didn’t know what he was so afraid of. It was only a piano. He played the piano almost every day at school. _It’s different and you know it._ He sat down at the corner of his bed, glaring at the cardboard. It was torn and tattered like Castiel’s spirit. _They can’t hurt you. Not here._

He stood up and started to assemble an old friend. He had once spent many hours playing piece after piece, song after song, every chance he could get. It was the love of his life at one point. The last time he played like that was before the talent show in eighth grade. _You mean the talent show you never competed in?_

The first time he ever touched a piano was close to fifteen years ago. It was the beginning of November, Castiel wasn’t even three, but he could still remember it as if it were yesterday. If anything, he was pretty sure it was one of his first memories. He and Gabriel went to visit their Aunt Amara at her Central Park West apartment while their parents went away on vacation. While dinner was in the oven, his Aunt Amara decided to take her place in front of the piano, his cousin, Michael, was quick to join her.  “Heart and Soul” to this day, had always been his aunt’s go-to duet piece. As soon as the notes started to fill the apartment, Castiel raced over to the Bösendorfer with a pillow. He sat next to them and listened to their duet sound through the Upper West side, putting songbirds to shame. He closed his eyes and let the wave of notes soothe him as they played in tandem.

“Castiel, sweetie? Would you like to play?” His Aunt Amara asked when she noticed him sitting there.

Castiel would never forget the smile that spread across her face as he climbed up onto the bench and waited for her instructions. He could still feel the gentle kiss she placed on the top of his head before she pointed out which key went to which note on the sheet music she had in front of her.

That day was the first time he had ever heard the Beatles.

When the power cord was finally firmly plugged into the wall, and the piano was completely assembled, Castiel pulled over his desk chair and sat in front of his memories. He took one final deep breath before he let his fingers rest upon the keys.

Within moments, he began to sing and play the same song she did for him all those years ago. “Hey, Jude.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> About friggin time they kissed, am I right? Lol  
> Leave a comment with any complaints, questions, or concerns.  
> Thank you for reading!!!!


	17. Chapter Seventeen

“Shit,” Dean grumbled.

Sam’s head snapped to look at Dean. “What?”

“I forgot to give Cas my copy of Blade Runner. We’re seeing the new one on our date next Sunday.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Maybe if you weren’t so busy making him late for class this morning , you would have remembered, dumbass.”

Dean picked up the textbook he was reading at the kitchen table and threw it across the room.

Sam slammed his pen down on the kitchen table. “What the fuck, man?!”

“Maybe if you weren’t such a dick, I wouldn’t have had to do that,” Dean snarled.

“I’m not the one who is trying to get caught on school property kissing a student, moron.”

Dean balled his fists at his sides. “I’m not the...”

“I swear, if you two idjits don’t shut up, I’m gonna come in there and wallop on the both of ya. Ya, hear?!” Bobby hollered from his chair in the living room.

“Bobby, he…” Dean began.

“I don’t care who started it. I’m finishing it. Now , come in here and help me order a pizza,” Bobby shouted.

Dean walked into the living room and saw Bobby looking at the menu for Mama Mia’s. “Bobby, we’ve ordered from there a million times now. You seriously need to look at the menu?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, princess. Do you have something against me checking to make sure they have zeppoles today?” Bobby barked , e very word oozing with sarcasm.

Dean threw his hands up in defeat. “Fuck! What the hell is with you two?”

“Just order the usual, ya idjit. Don’t forget the friggin ’ zeppoles,” Bobby ordered.

“I’m not Sam. I remember things that you like to eat.”

“I heard that,” Sam yelled from the kitchen.

“Yeah. I know you heard it, bitch!” Dean screamed back.

“Jerk!” Sam hollered.

Dean started to dial the number for the pizza place. “I’m assuming that I’m picking it up to?”

“Aren’t you a smart boy,” Bobby replied sardonically.

“You know, it’s so nice living with such happy people,” Dean remarked as he rolled his eyes. When Annamarie answered, he ordered two meat lover pies, a cold antipasto, a dozen garlic knots, and a dozen zeppoles. “They said forty-five minutes.”

“We need soy milk,” Sam announced from the kitchen.

Dean grimaced.  _ That’s not milk. _ “Last time I checked, soybeans don’t have a mammary gland. As Lewis Black said, ‘It’s soy juice.’ Get it right.”

Sam gave Dean a bitch face as he entered the kitchen. “We’re out.”

“Okay? What do you want me to do about it?”

“You’re going to be right near The Village Market . C an you pick some up for me?” Sam asked as his expression changed to puppy dog eyes.

Dean groaned. “Fine.”

“Thank you,” Sam smiled as he sat back down at the kitchen table.

“Ugh! I’ll be back,” Dean announced as he grabbed his keys and leather jacket.

Dean slammed the door to the Impala after he parked.  _ Pains in my ass. Friggin Soy Juice. Not even real fucking milk. Makes me sick. _ He whipped out his phone and saw that the green light was blinking, letting him know he had a message. He unlocked his phone and smiled.

**Cas: Thank you.**

Dean furrowed his eyebrows as he chuckled.  _ What? _

**Dean: You’re welcome…?**

Dean entered the market. He waved hello to the guys behind the counter and headed to the refrigerators to grab the “milk”. His phone vibrated as he searched.

**Cas: You said I would thank you… I am.**

His face lit up.

**Dean: You played?**

**Cas: Yes.**

**Dean: That’s great, Cas! So, I’m assuming you enjoyed it?**

**Cas: I wouldn’t be thanking you if I didn’t enjoy myself, would I?**

He could hear the eye roll.

**Dean: I forgot to give you the DVD.**

**Cas: Is Sam going to the library tomorrow?**

**Dean: I don’t know. I could go. ;)**

**Cas: Dean…**

He could hear Cas’ deep timbre, saying his name, as he read the text.  _ Shit, that voice does things to me. _

**Dean: I know. Can’t be obvious. I’ll check with Sam when I get home.**

**Cas: Thank you. Drive safe :)**

“What’s got you smiling like a freak?”

Dean looked up and glared at the owner of that question. “Hello, Adam.”

“Hey, Winchester. It’s been awhile,” Adam smirked as he approached Dean.

_ God, I hate his smug ass.  _ “Yeah, not long enough.” 

“Awww, Dean. You’re not still upset about Schneider giving us the deal, are you?” Adam asked with a spurious pout.

“No. I’m not upset about that. I wasn’t there. You were the runner-up,” Dean replied as he shrugged. “Plus, from what I hear, she only gave you a demo. Not a deal. She had that prize planned for us.”

“She has plans for ‘The Forgotten Son.’ The demo was only the beginning.”

“Still only a demo?” Dean asked , then tsked. “Doesn’t sound like she has a lot of faith in you guys.”

“Well , maybe she’s being careful after putting her faith in a low life, like you,” Adam growled. He narrowed his eyes at Dean. “By the way, how’s Lily?”

Dean balled his fists at his sides. He could feel his nails cutting the skin of his palms. “Walk away, Adam.”

Adam gave Dean a maniacal grin. “Ooo, struck a nerve , didn’t I?”

“I said walk away,” he snarled.

Adam backed away. His hands in the air at his sides. “I’ll tell Schneider you say hi,” Adam promised and walked away.

It took everything Dean had in him to not pick things up and start throwing them. He closed his eyes and counted to ten. He took a few deep breaths to steady himself. When he opened his eyes, he had calmed down enough to find the soy milk. He made his selection, paid for the “milk,” and dropped it off in the car before he went to the pizza place.

He was in another world while he was paying for the pizza. The guys behind the counter tried to make small talk with him, but most of his answers were either grunts or head nods. When he had all of the boxes, bags, and containers in hand, he went back to the Impala.

He sat in the driver seat for a moment or two, seething with rage.  _ You’re the fucking idiot who let that happen. His smug ass is lapping of the royalties of his shitty music because you couldn’t keep your shit together. _

His cell phone started to vibrate in his pocket.

**Cas: Turns out my dad has a copy of the movie… No worries if you can’t make it tomorrow :)**

_ Just like that, my weekend is fucked. _

 

>>>>>>

 

“Harrison Ford is kickass. I’m not sure if this is really your type of movie, kid,” Chuck explained as he grabbed the DVD he was looking for. He turned and handed it to Castiel. “If you’re gonna start watching Harrison Ford movies, you should really watch _Indiana Jones._ Those movies are awesome. _Raiders_  rocked my world. It was a Spielberg and Lucas love child. Definitely one of my top ten favorite movies.”

Castiel chuckled. “I’ll keep that in mind, dad. However, I’m only watching this one because I don’t want to be lost next Sunday.”

“Most of the time, with these random sequels years later, you don’t really need to watch the original in order to somewhat enjoy the movie. Movies nowadays are just reboots of stuff they’ve already made a thousand times anyway. It takes a lot to surprise me.”

_ I don’t think I’ve heard him babble like this in a while. _ “Dad, you’re a writer and editor. It doesn’t shock me that it takes a lot to surprise you.”

Chuck held his pointer finger up. “That is very true,” he smiled brightly. He gave Castiel a pat on the back. “Enjoy, kid.”

“Thanks, dad.”

Castiel started walking towards his room. He lightly smacked the DVD case on his palm as he approached his bedroom door.

“Was that you playing and singing it your room before?” Gabriel was standing at his door.

Castiel turned around to talk to him. “Yes. Why?”

Gabriel nodded his head. “It’s been a while since I’ve heard you do that,” he answered. A ghost of a smile was threatening to appear.

“Yeah, Dean convinced me that it was stupid to let my past demons haunt me.”

Gabriel continued to nod his head. He went to enter his room. Without turning his head he spoke. “He hurts you,” he looked at Castiel, “Charlie won’t have to kill him. I will.”

“Noted.”

Gabriel shut the door behind him.

_ I’ll take illegitimate death threats against Dean any day over screaming matches. _

Castiel turned on his TV to watch the movie. After watching it for fifteen minutes , he messaged Dean.

**Castiel: You’re taking me to see a movie about clones?**

Within seconds he received Dean’s reply.

**Dean: You’re watching it?**

**Castiel: No.**

**Dean: I can hear the eye roll from here. Lol**

**Castiel: I have no idea what you’re talking about.**

**Dean: Uh-huh…**

**Castiel: *eye roll***

**Dean: Don’t you have a movie you should be watching?**

**Castiel: My dad told me Blade Runner should not be the Harrison Ford movie I start with. He said I should start with Indiana Jones.**

**Dean: YOU’VE NEVER WATCHED INDIE?!?!**

**Dean: I am soooo revoking Charlie’s movie geek card. She has failed you.**

Castiel laughed out loud.  _ It’s not her fault that I’m not a movie person. _

**Castiel: Knowing her, she probably tried and failed miserably. You should have seen the fit she threw when I refused to watch the Star Trek movies.**

**Dean: Okay… That’s it. I don’t care if I have to tie you down, we are watching movies together.**

**Castiel: I’ll bring the rope ;)**

It was about fifteen minutes before he heard from Dean.

**Dean: It’s mean giving me imagery like that.**

**Castiel: Change of subject?**

**Dean: Please… unless?**

**Castiel: We are not even close to conversations like that, Dean.**

They messaged each other back and forth for the remainder of the evening. Castiel calculated he probably watched about an eighth of the movie in total.  _ Doesn’t matter. Dean will probably get me to watch it again eventually. It’s going to take me forever to understand half of his references. _

Dean told Castiel that Sam was planning on going to Kevin’s for the weekend so he wouldn’t be able to go to the library. Castiel hated himself for feeling even a modicum of disappointment that he wouldn’t be seeing Dean until Tuesday. However, having the ability to message Dean whenever he wanted definitely softened the blow.  _ You’ll just talk to him tomorrow. _

He drifted off into a peaceful slumber. His dreams filled with ropes, chains, and blissed out moans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for another short chapter. I legitimately feel terrible when I post short chapters like this. Hope you enjoyed. See ya in a week!


	18. Chapter Eighteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Considering this is my first fic, it blows my mind that I have over 1000 hits. Thank you for reading!!!!

It had been years since Castiel had been as at ease and happy as he was during the last full week of October. Dean had been messaging him at all hours of the day. He could have lived without the random texts about Dean’s dream he received at three in the morning on Tuesday, but he lived to wake up and see the ones that didn’t wake him up the next day.

During that final week, he felt like he was having the same conversation over and over. “What are you going to be dressing up as for the Halloween party?” Charlie had asked him about fifty times. Jo about twenty. _The only reason they're bothering you that often is because Jo is pissed that Charlie wants to dress up as Hermione for the tenth year in a row._ He was ready to smite Meg for the number of times she had asked him. Anna wasn’t going, so she was the only one who wasn’t bothering him about it. She did tell him more than once he should dress up as Sherlock. He outright refused that option. Besides the fact that he knew he didn’t want to go as Sherlock, he honestly had no idea what to wear or who to be.

“I don’t know what to wear either,” Sam admitted to him, Thursday before the party, at lunch.

“Are you doing anything after school?” Castiel asked.

Sam narrowed his eyes at him. “No. Why?”

“I was thinking, maybe we could go to the school library and look at some costume ideas together,” Castiel said with a shrug.

Sam nodded his head. “I’ll let Dean know where I am.”

Castiel blushed at the mention of Dean. “Ok, good.”

Sam groaned. “Ugh, enough with the fucking heart eyes! I am not going to the library with you if you do that the entire time. The two of you are making me sick.”

Castiel coughed to keep himself from giggling uncontrollably from unabashed glee. “Sorry. I’ll try harder next time.”

“Well, you better!”

Band was relatively dull now that Hofstra was over. Mr. Davies and Mr. Turner no longer had to worry about Hofstra, so they were now focused on the Winter Concert and Disney follow-up. _I am not a big fan of Christmas music… Ironic, considering I’m named after an angel._ Anna and Castiel looked at the sheet music when it was first handed to them and sighed at one another.

When the final bell rang, Castiel packed up his oboe, said goodbye to Anna, then made his way to the orchestra room. He stood next to the doors for a few minutes until Sam exited with Kevin, Max, and Alicia.

“Hiya, Castiel!” Sam greeted him excitedly.

 _He’s like a massive puppy._ “Hey, guys,” Castiel said as he acknowledges each of them.

Each of them gave him their version of greeting.

“See you later, guys!” Sam put his hand on Castiel’s back, then steered him towards the stairwell by the main office.

When they passed by the main office, Alastair and his goons were leaning against one of the walls nearby. All of his goons faces were held in deep scowls. Alastair, however, was smiling maliciously at Castiel.

“That guy is creepy as fuck,” Sam mentioned as they started to climb the stairs.

Castiel nodded in agreement. “Well, considering he is a creep, probably has something to do with it. That’s putting it nicely, too, I might add.”

“He seems to have it out for you or something,” Sam continued. “Since the first week of school, every time I see him looking at you he has this face.” Sam attempted to mirror Alastair’s expressions and failed. “He’s sick.”

Castiel arched an eyebrow. “Understatement,” Castiel stated as he grasped the library door. “We do not have the best history. Which, again, is putting it nicely.” He held the door open to let Sam enter.

“What happe…”

“That is a story I rather not tell. We have other things to attend to here.”

They walked over to the librarian, Ms. Novak, to greet her. “Hello, Castiel and Sam! It’s great to see the two of you! Here to check out a book?”

“No,” Castiel responded. “We’re actually here to use the computers. We’re attending a costume party and sadly have no idea what to wear. We thought it would be best to do a bit of research together online.”

Ms. Novak smiled brightly. “Well, I trust you boys know how to use one. If you need me, you know where to find me.”

“Thank you!” Castiel and Sam answered in unison.

After Castiel logged into one of the computers, he went to Google. “Okay… Now what?”

Sam’s gaze lifted to the ceiling. “Um… well, there is TV, movies, books, comics, some people do idioms, animals, mytho…”

“You’re not helping,” Castiel interrupted.

Sam huffed. “Try TV first, then.” 

Castiel selected images and typed in “popular male characters on TV,” then used the cursor to scan through the results. He didn’t see anything he would be able to pull off.

“Oh, hey! Dr. Sexy MD! I could do that, especially since Ru…” Sam paused before he continued. “I can do Dr. Sexy. I own cowboy boots. Scrubs are relatively cheap at Walmart. I just need a stethoscope and a lab coat.”

“My mom is a nurse. I’m sure she has a broken one lying around. I’ll see what I can do about the lab coat, too,” Castiel offered.

Sam beamed at Castiel before he turned back to the computer. “You could do Sherlock. I think you can pull him off.”

 _Not him, too._ “No.”

“Okay… Then, what do you have in mind?” Sam asked.

“I don’t know. I jus…” He trailed off when he saw what he was looking for. “Who is that?” He asked himself, out loud, as he selected the picture. It was a man wearing a tan trench coat, red tie, and a suit; his hand was holding a ball of fire. “Constantine?”

“One problem, Castiel,”

Sam pulled Castiel out of his daze. He raised an eyebrow at him. “What?”

“John Constantine has blond hair. Last time I checked you have dark brown,” Sam mentioned as he pointed at Castiel’s mess of brown hair.

“I’m sure I could find a wig,” Castiel argued as he turned back to the computer to key in the name John Constantine. The page was filled with images of the DC Comic book character and the character from the television series. “Hey! He has brown hair!” Castiel announced as he pointed to a man wearing a black suit and tie.

Sam’s eyes widened as he looked at the computer screen. “No. You are not going as the Keanu Reeves’ Constantine. I won’t allow it.”

“Okay… Well, I’m going as Constantine. I do not have to buy a single thing if I go as him.”

“Again, Castiel, you have dark brown hair. Not blonde hair. What are you going to do, bleach your hair for a day?” Sam asked.

 _He’s got a point…_ “Hold that thought.” Castiel took out his cell phone and quickly texted Charlie.

**Castiel: Do you know anyone who owns a blonde wig?**

_Hurry up, Charlie._ It only took her about fifteen seconds to respond.

**Charlie: Um… I think Eddie has one he used when he dressed up as Draco one year.**

**Charlie: Wait… Are we talking short or long hair?**

**Castiel: Short. The Draco wig would be perfect.**

**Charlie: Okay. Let me check.**

Sam and Castiel sat in silence as they waited for Charlie to respond.

**Charlie: He still has it. I already asked if you could borrow it. He said yes. He can bring it in tomorrow.**

Castiel looked up at Sam and smiled. “Constantine it is.”

 

>>>>>>

 

The grin that was plastered continuously on Dean’s face had no chance of ever going away. He was constantly walking on air. After what happened at The Village Market with Adam, Dean thought his weekend was going to be dreadful, but he couldn’t have been more wrong.

Saturday at the shop was perfect. He did a full service and inspection on a ‘67 Chevy Nova. The the rest of his day was spent doing some minor detailing on a ‘72 Chevy Caprice. He loved working on classic cars. The newer models were all computers. Classics were puzzles he loved to solve. _God, I love this job._

Dean enjoyed filling in at the shop, but he knew he would never truly be happy if he stayed in the shop for the rest of his life. Music is where his heart truly lived.

He spent eight hours with the band on Sunday. They went over some covers and even started working on some originals again. Pam had thoroughly warmed up to him yet. She also squeezed his ass at one point. When he turned to give her the evil eye, she winked at him. _At least she’s not throwing shit at me._

Monday was torture. Which wasn’t new. What was new were the text messages he received from Cas throughout the day. Some of them said the most random things.

**Cas: I like bees. When I was around six or seven, I followed a honeybee outside in our garden. My mom swears to this day that I said “I saw the route of flowers. It's all right there, the whole plan. There's nothing to add.”**

**Cas: Did you know that a cat's penis is sharply barbed along its shaft?**

**Cas: You know the riddle “Why is six afraid of seven?” For the longest time, I thought it was because seven is a prime number and prime numbers can be intimidating. Gabriel informed me it’s because seven eight nine.**

Every single one of those messages brought a little sunshine into his life.

He made sure to be the first person to text him every day. On Tuesday morning, he was greeted by a somewhat surly Cas when he exited the auditorium. Apparently, text messages at three in the morning are not appreciated.  He couldn’t help himself. He knew it could have waited until the next day, but he had to let him know about the random dream he woke up from. _It’s not my fault that you were talking about bees and then my brain had you showing up on my car covered in them. At least I didn’t mention the naked part._

Work was still hectic, but nothing like it was when Hofstra was approaching. Disney paperwork was still being organized and distributed, which luckily was more of an administrator’s job than a student teacher/teaching assistant’s job. The only thing that was a problem was dealing with Rufus’ constant ornery complaints about **everything**. Dean never realized how much Rufus truly complained until he started working with him. He found himself seeking refuge in Ellen’s office more often than not to escape him. He started noticing Mick had a habit of doing the same thing.

Dean found himself longing for the end of December because his job was keeping him from being as close to Cas as he truly wanted to be. He noticed on more than one occasion how close an eye Rufus and Ellen were keeping on him when he was around Cas. When Ellen did, it was out of concern. When Rufus did, it was so he could complain about something else.

On Thursday, Sam messaged him to tell him he was staying after with Cas. For some reason, Sam failed to mention he was also going to be attending the same party Cas was planning on going to on Saturday. Now, he needed a costume.

Dean pulled up to the school at around 2:45, then sat out front waiting for Sam. At 2:50, Sam appeared at the entrance with Cas behind him.

“Okay. We can go,” Sam said as he got into the car.

Dean watched as Cas waved and started to walk towards the school. He jumped out of the car. “Cas?”

Cas paused and turned around. “Dean?”

 _Fuck, that voice._ He coughed. “Do you need a ride?”

The smile he received in reply was enough to answer his question.

“Hop on in,” Dean said with a wave of his hand. When Cas slid into the back and started to caress the leather seats, Dean swallowed hard. “You like her?” he asked as he looked at Cas in his rearview mirror.

“She’s gorgeous. You seriously rebuilt her?” Cas asked with evident awe.

Sam rolled his eyes. “Yes.”

He could hear Sam muttering something else, but he ignored him. “Yeah, I rebuilt her. Bobby and I finished her up right before graduation.”

Dean watched as Cas’ eyes continued to soak up Baby’s interior. “She’s stunning.”

_Stop thinking dirty thoughts. Stop thinking dirty thoughts. Stop…_

“Jesus! Do you want me to get out of the car so you guys can fuck or something?” Sam barked.

Castiel’s expression was a mix of arousal, frustration, and embarrassment. “Sorry, Sam. I didn’t mean to cause you any discomfort,” Cas admitted as he blushed and looked down at his now knotted fingers.

“It’s ok, Cas. I appreciate you ogling my baby. Just treat her like the lady she is, and we won’t have any problems,” Dean suggested with a grin and a wink.

Castiel made one of his gummy smiles as he looked at his hands.

“Can we go?” Sam asked as he nearly whined.

“Yeah, we’re going.” Dean put the car in drive. “So, where to, Cas?”

“I live near the elementary school,” Cas answered.

Dean chuckled. “Okay? Which one? There are four of them.”

“The one that is over by the middle school.”

 _Give me more to go on than that._ “Which middle school? Both of them are near an elementary school.”

“The one off of Peconic.”

_Shit, he lives that close to us?_

“We live on the north side of the train tracks. Right across from that elementary school, near the overpass,” Sam mentioned before Dean had a chance.

“You live that close?”

“That’s exactly what I was just thinking,” Dean declared.

“Wow…” Cas whispered.

_My sentiments exactly._

When they crossed Vet’s Highway and entered Cas’ neighborhood, Cas finished giving him directions to his house. As Dean pulled in front of the house, he couldn’t help but think about how close they did live to one another. _Fuck, I could walk here…_

“I’m gonna step outside for a second,” Sam announced out of nowhere.

Before Dean could ask why Sam was getting out of the car, he was already closing the front passenger side door. _Weird kid…_ He looked back at Cas, who was in the process of putting his bag onto his back. “So… I’ll see you tomorrow I guess.”

Cas spared a glance at Dean before he nodded his head and finished putting his bag on his back. “Yes.”

“Talk to you later?”

Castiel smiled sweetly. “Of course.”

Dean felt his face flush.

Dean heard Sam’s muffled sigh coming from outside of the car. “You know I didn’t step out here so you two could be coy with one another. Get it over with, so I can go home.”

Dean internally shrugged as he unbuckled his seat. _Don’t have to tell me twice._ He turned around, grabbed Cas by both of his backpack straps, and kissed him. Just like last time, within a second, he felt his entire body start to buzz with electricity. The current went all the way to his toes, lighting him up and bringing him to life, like Frankenstein’s monster.

As he did before, Cas took control of the kiss and grabbed the back of Dean’s head to pull them closer together. He ran his tongue gently over Cas’ upper lip. This time when Cas gave him his opening, he took it without the worry of a bell stopping them. The moment their tongues met, whatever semblance of control the two of them had was gone. Cas was all but pulling Dean into the back seat as their tongues teased one another. He grabbed a bit of Dean’s hair and pulled as he bit Dean’s bottom lip.

“Fuck,” Dean moaned before Cas pulled him in for another kiss.

There was banging on the roof of the car. Both Cas and Dean groaned. _Jesus Christ! What the fuck?!?!?!_

“I WANT TO GO HOME!!!”

Dean leaned to kiss Cas. His lips were met with two fingers pushing him back. _What?!_

Castiel cleared his throat. “If I kiss you again, he’s going to have to walk home.”

If Dean wasn’t hard before, that comment solidified it. “Then, he can walk home,” he responded as he went to kiss him again.

“Dean,” Cas warned, his voice dropping an octave lower.

 _That is not helping._ Dean all but pouted as he sat back in his seat. “Fine.”

Cas kissed him on the cheek. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Dean turned his head, then grabbed the nape of Cas’ neck to give him one final kiss. When he released him, Cas’ half-pursed lips and closed eyes made him giggle. “You’re adorable.”

Castiel blinked a few times, then blushed. “Goodbye, Dean.”

“Later, Cas,” he smirked. He watched as Cas slid out of the back seat, then closed the door behind him. _Fuck, I’ll never get used to kissing him._

He heard Sam say goodbye to Cas before he got into the car. “You owe me **big** fucking time. I am going to need brain bleach for the rest of my life to get the sounds you two were making out of my head.”

Dean pursed his lips and nodded. “Dim sum?”

Sam crossed his arms over his chest. “It’s a start, jerk.”

“Bitch.”

He waited for Cas to enter the house before he put the car in drive, then headed towards the train tracks. _It would take me fifteen minutes to walk here… this could be interesting._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I need to explain myself. The whole Keanu Reeves Constantine thing is because my friend goes on a rant about how his Constantine is not really Constantine. I've listened to the rant countless times, so that whole entire scene is in honor of him. I actually enjoy that movie. Lol


	19. Chapter Nineteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning in this chapter.

After school on Friday, Sam and Dean went to the Islandia Walmart in search of some scrubs for Sam’s costume. Dean wasn’t the biggest fan of going to any Walmart or shopping center because of the parking lots. More than once he had to fix nicks, dents, and scratches that appeared on his Baby.

The store was packed. Both of them figured it was probably due to some last minute costume shopping. 

“Sammy, you could have told me about this last week. Now we’re stuck with this mess,” Dean groaned as he tossed three bags of candy into the cart.

Sam raised an eyebrow at the amount of candy that was now sitting at the bottom of the cart and rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I could have. I just didn’t know what I was going to be until yesterday.”

“You know, I love that you and Bobby picked on me for watching Dr. Sexy a couple of times,”  _ What they don’t know, won’t hurt them.  _ “But it’s okay for you to dress up like him for Halloween.”

“I have cowboy boots,” Sam said with a shrug.

“Killer reason to go with that costume,” Dean praised in jest as he gave Sam a thumbs up and one sham of a wink.

“Castiel told me his mom could probably get me a lab coat. She’s working today, so he said he’d let me know,” Sam mentioned as he started to peruse the scrubs selection.

Dean cleared his throat. “Cas never mentioned what he plans on wearing.”

Sam continued his search as he answered, “John Constantine.”

“Really?”

Sam turned around to face Dean. “Yeah. He said that it’s because he doesn't have to buy a single thing. It looks like Castiel had the same ‘killer reason to go with that costume’ as I did,” Sam scoffed.

Dean narrowed his eyes at Sam. “He has dark brown hair. Constantine has blonde.” His eyes widened. “ **Please** tell me he is not going as the Keanu Reeves version.”

Sam shook his head vigorously. “Trust me. I put a kibosh on that the  **second** he saw the picture. He’s borrowing a wig from one of Charlie’s LARP buddies.”

Dean breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank you, God!”

“Last time I checked , I’m not God.”

“Thank you, Sam," Dean said sardonically as he rolled his eyes.

“That’s better,” Sam grinned as he finally found the right size scrubs. “We can go now.”

They headed over to the registers to check out when Dean saw Alastair walking out of one of the aisles. He held his arm up, blocking Sam’s way.  _ I am not dealing with that dick right now. _

“What the hell, Dean? I’d like to leave sometime today you know.”

Dean put his arm down and faced his brother. “How about we go to the electronics area?”

“I don’t want to g… Geez, that creep is fucking smiling at us.”

_ Fuck, he saw me. _ “What creep?”

“Some guy that is constantly looking at Castiel like he is either the bane of his existence or a toy he can play with.”

_ He what?  _ “Excuse me?”

“Yesterday , when we were heading to the library, he was leering at Castiel with the most haunting smile I have ever seen. The guy is a fucking creep…” Sam paused. “Why is he walking over to us?”

_ Fuck. _ “Sam, walk away. Go look at something somewhere that is not here.”

Sam’s eyes widened exponentially. “Do you know him?!”

“Sam, please, don’t argue with me right now just…”

“Dean, Dean, Dean.”

Dean turned around and glared at the demon in front of him. “Alastair.”

Alastair smirked. “It’s good to see you again, Dean.”

“Can’t say the same,” Dean growled.

“Who’s this?” Alastair asked as he nodded his head towards Sam.

“None of your business.”

Alastair’s mouth formed into a perfect “O” before he smiled maliciously. “Is this little brother? Hello, Sammy. He used to talk about you all of the time.”

“Funny, he never mentioned you,” Sam spat as he grimaced at both of them. "And it's Sam."

Somehow, Alastair’s grin was able to widen further. “Aww, I’m sure he just forgot to mention me. We have someone in common,” he looked into Dean’s eyes as he hissed the name. “Lilith.”

“Not anymore,” Dean said through gritted teeth.

“No. Not anymore. Now we have someone else in common. How is your sweet little angel?”

“Go to hell!” Sam barked.

Alastair tsked at Sam. “Ah if only I could, but they’d just keep sending me back up to this shithole .” H e turned his sneer back to Dean. “Anyway, no time to chat. I got a hot date. I’ll be seeing you tomorrow, Dean.”

Sam and Dean watched as Alastair sauntered over to the registers. 

“Talk, now!” Sam ordered.

Dean’s head bowed. “What do you want me to say, Sammy?”

“How do you know him?”

“Lily.”

Sam huffed out a breath.

“He’s Lily’s cousin…”

“Does Castiel know that you know him?”

“No. Not really.”

Sam scoffed. “What does that mean?”

He could feel Sam’s glare. “He knows that I have spoken to him a couple of times, to get him to back off.” 

“They have history, Dean,” Sam snapped.

Dean let out a breath. “I know.”

“You know, and you haven’t told him?”

Dean raised his head to look at Sam. Steam was coming out of his ears. “I’m ashamed of it, Sammy.”

“I’d be ashamed of knowing him , too, especially since he acted like you guys were friends. How could you be friends with him, Dean?”

“He wasn’t really a friend.”

Sam huffed out a frustrated breath. “Yeah? Then, what was he?”

“My dealer, Sam! Alright?!” Dean growled. His self-loathing had finally gotten a hold of his emotions as he snapped at Sam. “He was your low life of a brother’s fucking heroine dealer. Among other things.”

Sam’s lips formed into a thin line. “He’s not anymore?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “I said ‘was,’ didn’t I?”

Sam softly nodded his head. “You have to tell Castiel. He had me walking him to the bus every day because of the looks Alastair and his friends were giving him. You have to tell him that you know him.”

“I will.”

“You better. It may hurt him, but it’s better for him to find out from you.”

Dean bit the inside of his cheek. “I’ll tell him on Sunday.”

“If you don’t tell him, I will.”

Dean looked up at Sam with grief and understanding.

Sam put a hand on Dean’s back as he started to steer him towards the registers. “You’re my brother , Dean , and I love you, but you can’t lie about something like this. He doesn’t deserve that. You don’t have to tell him about the heroine, not yet, but at least tell him about Alastair.”

“I’ll tell him,” Dean affirmed.

“Good. Now, can we pay so we can leave?”

Dean gave Sam a crooked smile. “Yeah. Let’s go.”

 

>>>>>>

 

The final home game of the season was bittersweet. It was nice knowing he wasn’t going to have to sit on freezing cold bleachers for the rest of the year, but it was also the last home game Castiel would ever attend and perform. By the time Anna and Castiel made it to the bleachers, at the end of halftime, Anna was sobbing uncontrollably on Castiel’s shoulder.

“We’re” {hiccup} “never” {sob} “going to” {sniffle} “do this” {hiccup} “again,” she could hardly get out the words.

Castiel was petting her head as he held her close. “That’s not true. We still have Disney coming up.”

“It’s not” {sniffle} “the same.”

“No. It’s not. It’s even better.”

Anna began to calm down a little more as Castiel started to rub soothing circles on her back. “How?”

“Well , for one, it’s Disney.”

She gave him a wet chuckle.

“Two, we’ll be escaping New York to enjoy the blissfully warm weather while it’s freezing up here.”

Anna took a deep stuttered breath. “That’s true.”

“Three, we’re not performing in front of the dicks from the football team.”

Anna’s body started to shake with laughter. “That’s a serious plus.” 

Castiel pushed her gently away from him so he could get a good look at her. 

Her eyes were puffy and red. She wiped her nose on her sleeve. “I’m just going to miss this. You know?”

“I know.”

Anna leaned in and gave him one more hug. When they separated, she smiled at him. “Let’s go sit on those cold fucking bleachers one last time.”

Castiel chuckled. “Yes. You know how much I enjoy that.”

Jo and Charlie joined the two of them not long after. Unfortunately for Anna, they spent most of the second half of the game talking about the party at Meg’s house. Jo and Charlie finally decided on a costume. Jo was dressing up as Buffy. Charlie was going to be, as she put it, badass Wicca goddess Willow.

“I don’t know, I figure I just switched from one badass redhead to another,” Charlie said with a shrug.

Jo scoffed. “Yeah. The arguing we did for almost a week and a half had nothing do with this decision.”

“Hey, at least I talked you out of Gamora. You would have been scrubbing the green body paint off for weeks,” Charlie retorted.

“Says the person who wanted to dress up as Mystique,” Jo stated, as she crossed her arms over he chest.

Charlie narrowed her eyes at Jo. “You liked that idea, too, and you know it.”

Jo rolled her eyes. “So, Charlie and I should be at your house around 9:30. Sound good to you?”

“Perfect,” he beamed. “Gives me plenty of time to eat and get ready.”

“I wish I could go,” Anna mumbled. “My mom doesn’t like Meg.”

“My mom has gotten used to Meg,” Castiel mentioned. “Doesn’t mean she likes her either.”

“My mom called her a demon to her face,” Anna stated.

Jo threw her head back in a laugh. “That must have been hilarious.”

Anna shook her head. “No. Meg turned to my mom and said ‘Takes one to know one, sugar lips.’”

Jo and Charlie started to laugh hysterically.

Castiel pursed his lips as he nodded his head. “Yup. That sounds like Meg.”

When the final whistle blew, Castiel said goodbye to Anna as he gathered his things. After a quick hug, he made his way up to the school.  

Dean was busy talking to Mr. Davies and Mr. Turner. He smiled as he passed by.

“Isn’t that sweet.” 

Castiel turned towards the sound of the snake like voice.  _ You’ve always got something to say, don’t you? _

Alastair was strutting towards him with his helmet in his hands. “Someone is hot for teacher.”

As usual, Castiel refused to speak to Alastair. He merely stared daggers at him.

“Daddy’s little girl is sweet on you , too, princess,” he divulged as he started to step into Castiel’s personal space. “I can tell he wants a piece. I can’t imagine what it must feel like knowing that I will always be the one who got the first slice,” Alastair whispered. His voice was sickeningly sweet in his ear.

Castiel felt his stomach turn as his spirit broke.

“He doesn’t know, does he?” Alastair asked with a sneer.

Castiel looked into his tormentor’s eyes. It took everything he had not to unleash the wrath that was threatening to boil over inside of him.

Alastair softly chuckled. He leaned in close to Castiel to whisper in his ear. “I didn’t think so.”

“Alastair!” Castiel heard Dean scream from behind him.

“That’s my cue, princess. See you tonight,” Alastair said with a crooked smile, then jogged off towards the school.

Castiel was shaking. He could feel his knees growing weak.  _ Hold it together, Castiel. _

“Cas!” Dean was yelling as he approached.

“I’m fine.”  _ No. You’re not. Go ahead, lie. That always makes things better. _

“You don’t look fine.” Dean held Castiel at arm's length to give him a once-over. “What did he say to you?”

“The usual shit. Different flavor,” Castiel replied as he turned to walk to the school.

Dean grabbed hold of his arm. “Woah, Cas. Don’t walk away just yet. Alright?” 

“I can handle it. I don’t need you to fight my battles for me,” he snapped at Dean.

“That’s not why I’m telling you not to walk away, I...” Dean paused as if he was trying to think of something to say. “Did your mom bring the lab coat and stethoscope with her?”

“No, I brought it with me. It’s in the band room. You know that.”  _ Stop trying to stall me, Dean. _

Dean chuckled nervously as he rubbed the nape of his neck with his hand. “Right… Sorry. Slipped my mind.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Are you coming or what?”

They walked in silence as they made their way to the band room. Castiel could see Dean sneaking glances at him, in the corner of his eye.  _ God, if you want to ask me something, just ask. Get it over with. _

It wasn’t until they were in front of the auditorium that Dean finally decided to speak. “So , we never scheduled a time for tomorrow.”

_ Not what I was expecting. _ Castiel smiled softly. “I figured that we’d see an early movie, then eat at the diner after.”

“I’ll text you some showtimes later. You just let me know which one works best for you,” Dean replied , h is eyes smiling back at Castiel.

Castiel took a deep breath. “I’m sorry I snapped at you back there. Alastair is a dick, as you so rightly put it. He just knows how to get under my skin.”

“It’s okay… I understand. I just worry about you is all. I… I don’t trust him,” Dean stammered.

Castiel shrugged. “Neither do I. Even so, I can’t just stop living because he… because I don’t trust him.”

Dean nodded his head in understanding.

As soon as they entered the band room, Castiel walked over to his seat and picked up the bag that held the stethoscope and the neatly folded lab coat. He handed it to Dean. “We plan on being at the party by around 10 or 10:30. I’ve already informed Sam when the party starts. Just remind him of our arrival time for me.” 

Dean stepped a little closer to Castiel. “Are you sure you’re okay, Cas?”

“I’ll be okay once this party tonight is over. Meg wants me there, desperately. I’m just surprised she invited Alastair.”  _ Pissed is more like it. _ “I’ll talk to her about it later.”  _ If she’s not already drunk and/or high. _

Dean’s lip formed into a thin line. “He’s going?”

“Apparently,” Castiel huffed.

“And you’re still thinking about going?” Dean questioned.

Castiel scoffed. “I’m not going to stop living because of him. Plus, I’m not going to be alone. I have Jo, Charlie, and Sam. I’d say Meg, but she’ll probably be wasted by the time we get there.”

Castiel watched as Dean took a few deep breaths as an attempt to calm himself down. 

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yes. Okay. I’m happy you won’t be alone,” Dean said as he gave Castiel a smile that hardly reached his eyes.

“You’re a shitty liar,” Castiel half-heartedly chuckled.

Dean shrugged. “Yeah. Well , I’m not the boss of you, so I can’t forbid you to go or some shit. So , lying it is.”

“How about, as soon as I get home later, I text you?” Castiel asked sweetly.

Dean gave Castiel a crooked smile. “That works,” Dean chuckled. “Do you know how much it sucks that I can’t kiss you right now?” 

“You can kiss me all you want tomorrow,” Castiel promised with a wink.

Dean pointed a finger at Castiel. “I’m holding you to that. We won’t have interruptions this time. No Sam. No bell.”

“I look forward to it,” he smiled coyly at Dean. Castiel felt his phone vibrating in his pocket.  _ Mom’s here.  _ “I have to go. I will text you later.”

“You better.”

“Goodbye, Dean.”

“Later, Cas.”

_ Tonight is going to horrendous... _


	20. Chapter 20

Charlie and Jo arrived at 9:30 as promised. Charlie was wearing a pair of jeans, a pink flowing blouse, a necklace with a sizeable amethyst, and a leather jacket. Jo was wearing a pair of red leather pants, a black tank top, a thick silver cross, a pair of boots, and a leather jacket that closely resembled Charlie’s. Jo was the only one holding a weapon. It was a perfect replica of Buffy’s stake.

Castiel didn’t notice any of that right away, of course. He was still busy running around the house when they arrived.

“Need any help, Castiel?” Charlie asked.

“No.”

“Are you sure?” Jo inquired.

“Positive.”

Jo and Charlie took their seat at the kitchen table.

“Would you girls like something to drink?” Becky asked.

“No. Thank you, Mrs. Shurley,” Jo replied.

Charlie pointed a thumb at Castiel as she looked at Becky. “What’s up with him?”

“Something about a tie,” Becky answered as she shrugged.

“What?” Jo and Charlie asked in unison.

Castiel put his search on hold for a moment while he answered their question. “I thought I owned a red tie. It turns out I don’t. I asked my dad. He doesn’t either. I texted Dean and Sam. Still no luck. I don’t own a red tie.”

Jo narrowed her eyes at him. “Okay? And?”

“John Constantine wears a red tie. I don’t own a red tie.”

“So, wear a different color tie, hun,” Becky offered.

“John Constantine wears a re…”

“Yes, we know, a red tie,” Charlie said as she rolled her eyes. “What colors do you have?”

“Black, Gray, Blue, Purple, White, Yellow, and Green,” Castiel responded, pointing to the kitchen table which held all of the ties he owned.

“How about purple?” Jo asked. “Purple has red in it.”

Both Charlie and Castiel narrowed their eyes at her.

“Geez! Touchy…” Jo grumbled.

“Blue always makes your eyes pop!” Charlie exclaimed.

“I could always go with black,” Castiel mentioned as he shrugged.

“I agree with Charlie, wear the blue,” Becky stated.

Castiel looked at all of the women who were adamantly nodding their heads at him. “Ugh, fine. I’ll wear the blue one.”

“You should probably get your wig on, too,” Charlie suggested.

Charlie fussed over Castiel for about fifteen minutes trying to hide his unruly hair under the wig. They used an obscene amount of product to keep his hair from popping up all over the place. It didn’t honestly work.

“I did my best,” Charlie admitted with a shrug.

“Fuck it!” Castiel snapped.

“Castiel, sweetie, language,” Becky chastised.

“Hannah is in bed, mom.”

“Still, language. Mind it. At least while I’m in the room,” Becky suggested as she gave him a pat on the cheek.

Castiel grabbed the blue tie, then attempted to make a Windsor knot as he watched himself in the mirror.  _ Ugh, it’s fucking backward. _  He looked at the time on his phone. It was almost ten.  _ It’s going to take nearly a half hour to get there. _  He walked into the kitchen. “Time to go.”

“Honey, your tie is ba…” Becky started.

Castiel held up a hand. “I know. Let’s just go. Get this over with,” he said as he grabbed his tan trench coat, then walked towards the front door.

Once everyone was piled into the car, Castiel texted Sam to let him know they were heading to Meg’s house.

_ Here goes nothing. _

 

>>>>>>

 

“I just got a text from Castiel. Time to go,” Sam informed Dean as he entered the kitchen.

Dean was finishing his final bite of pie. “Let’s go,” he said with his mouth still somewhat full.

“You’re such a gentleman,” Sam stated as he rolled his eyes.

Dean grabbed his leather jacket and the keys to his Baby. “What?” he asked , h is mouth still somewhat filled.

Sam shook his head as he exited the house before him.

Dean laughed.  _ Kid _ _ ’ _ _ s hilarious. _  “See ya later, Bobby.”

“You boys be careful, ya hear?” Bobby asked.

“Will do,” he replied as he closed the door, then locked it behind him.

When they were both in the car, Dean got the address from Sam, then put it into Google Maps. “Shit, it’s all the way near Dowling?”  _ Ugh, I hate driving there. _

“Is that far?” Sam asked.

“It’s about twenty-five minutes away.”

“Ew… How does she even go to school with us?” Sam questioned.

“Certain parts of that area fall into our district,” Dean mentioned with a small shrug.

“Well ,  better get going.”

They sat in relative quiet for about five minutes before Dean brought up what had been bothering him since earlier that day. “Alastair is going to be at the party.”

He saw Sam glance over at him in his peripherals. “What? How do you know?”

“Cas told me that Alastair said something about him being there.”

Sam shook his head. “That can’t be right. Meg knows how much Castiel hates Alastair. Why would she invite him?”

“Look, all I know is that he’s going to be there and Castiel was seriously shaken up after he spoke to him today.”

“What did Alastair say?”

“I don’t know. Cas wouldn’t tell me,” he admitted as he shook his head. They sat in silence again for a few more moments before Dean finally explained what he meant by mentioning all of this. “You need to stay with Cas all night.”

“What?”

“You heard me,” Dean snapped.

“I’m not the only one who is going to be there, ya know?”

“I know. However, I also know that if shit goes down ,  you’ll be able to handle it,” Dean conveyed.

“What the hell do you think is going to happen?” Sam asked with exasperation.

“I don’t know. There is going to be alcohol there, and if Alastair is there, then you can without a doubt add drugs to that equation. Shit can go south fast.”

“Well, I’ll ask Charlie and Jo to help keep an eye on him with me.”

Dean took his eyes off of the road to glare at Sam. “I’m asking you. Not them.”

“You’ve said it yourself that Jo punches like a wrecking ball. She can hold her own. Plus, who’s to say Castiel can’t take care of himself,” Sam argued.

“Alastair does not fight fair. Cas having some back-up helps.”

“All of this is purely conjecture, Dean. Nothing could end up happening.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “As you so clearly saw yesterday, I know him. I know what he’s like. Just trust me on this.”

“You're paranoid.”

“I am not paranoid.”

“Yes ,  you are!”

Dean knew they had reached their destination when he saw a mass of cars parked all along the street. Google maps told them they had arrived as they approached a white mansion that overlooked the bay. He could hear the sound of music blasting as he pulled up the street and parked.

Dean turned to look at his brother who was reaching for the door handle to leave. “Sammy… Look. I know this guy. I know how he thinks. Trust me on this and just stay close to Cas.”

“I have plans, Dean,” Sam finally admitted.

_ Of course, it’s about her.  _ “Really ? T hat’s why? Ruby is gonna be here, so everything revolves around that bitch now?”

“She’s not a bitch!” Sam barked.

“I have had four different people tell me otherwise. You are the only person who has stated the opposite. Four to one, Sammy. It kinda seems like you’re the one who may be in the wrong about this one.”

“I trust her. She’s been nice to me,” Sam muttered.

“Yeah? Hitler was nice to Ava. He still killed a shit ton of people,” Dean stated.

Sam rolled his eyes. “I’m going to the party, Dean.”

“I’m staying put.”

Sam paused as he started to open the door. “You’re what?”

“I’m parking my ass right here tonight.”

“Are you fucking kidding me, Dean?”

“No. I don’t trust him. My ass is sitting right here.”  _ I have a perfect view of the front of the house. I’ll see who comes and goes the entire night. _

“Dean, seriously, just go home.”

“No.”

“Dean.”

“I’m done arguing, Sam. I’m sitting right here.”

Sam gave Dean a bitch face, then rolled his eyes. “Fine.”

“Fine.”

Sam exited the car and slammed the door behind him.

Dean watched as Sam stomped towards Jo, Charlie, and Cas. Charlie looked over at the Impala before Sam wrapped his arm around her, and they went towards the house. Cas paused and waved before he followed the others.

_ I’m sitting right here. _  Dean grabbed a bag of candy that he left in a bag under the seat and ripped it open.  _ Mmmm, Milk Duds. _

 

>>>>>>

 

The drive to Meg’s house was far from new for Castiel. Meg used to live three blocks away from him when they were still in single digits. However, in seventh grade, she moved south of Montauk Highway because her mom wanted the view. From then on, Castiel had to make the trip to the south shore just to see her.

Becky reminded them she was going to be picking them up outside of the house at one am. Jo, Charlie, and Castiel knew the party would probably continue until the wee hours of the morning. Even so, they knew better than to argue. They all agreed to be there at one and set alarms on their phones so they could make sure they were all outside of the house by then.

They pulled up to the house at around 10:30, then said goodbye to Becky before she drove off. Castiel could see the Impala parked not too far up the street.  _ Maybe I should say hi. _

“Nuh-uh, Shurley,” Charlie warned. “You promised Meg you were going to be here. If you go over there, we all know you’re not coming back.”

Castiel’s looked down at the ground and kicked the air. “I was only going to say hi.”

“Uh-huh… And I really am Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” Jo remarked sarcastically.

“You look great, by the way. Just like her,” Castiel mentioned with a smile.

Jo’s face split into a wide grin. “Aww! Thanks, Castiel!”

“You’re welcome.”

Castiel heard the creak of the Impala door and a harsh slam behind him.

Sam was stomping towards them muttering to himself. When he saw the three of them, his face softened. “Hey, guys!”

“Rough night?” Charlie asked as she tilted to the side to get a view of the Impala without Sam’s large form blocking her way.

“Ugh, You don’t even know the half of it,” Sam groaned. He put his arm over Charlie’s shoulder. “Come on. Let’s go inside and have fun. I’m not a big fan of Halloween, but let’s see if maybe that will change tonight.”

Castiel stood a couple of seconds longer to stare at the Impala.  _ I really don’t want to go inside. Can’t I just stay out here? I can always just say hi to Meg, then come back out here.  _ Castiel waved at the Impala.  _ That’s what I’m going to do. _  He smiled.

“Shurley! Come on!” Jo yelled.

Castiel dragged his feet towards the house.  _ Ugh, give it ten minutes and then go back outside. _

The house was overcrowded. Meg mentioned that there were going to be a lot of people, but this was far from what he was expecting. Castiel went to school with basically everyone in the house, but he’d be lucky if he could name more than ten of them.

Everyone he looked at had a drink in their hands. Castiel looked into her dining room where he saw a lineup of people. There were three kegs and a table filled with a vast array of liquor.  _ How is it even close to possible for her to find this amount of alcohol? _

Castiel didn’t plan on drinking. He preferred to keep a clear mind at all times, especially knowing that Alastair was going to be there. The last thing he needed was to be cornered by that asshole while he was intoxicated.

They steadily made their way to the back of the house where they knew they would find Meg. Sure enough, he saw her with a group of people out on the deck. He opened the sliding glass door and was instantly bombarded by a cloud of marijuana smoke.  _ Yeah _ _ , _ _  definitely not going to be able to have any semblance of a serious conversation with her right now.  _ He waved his hand in the air a few times to keep himself from inhaling the smoke, then walked up to Meg.

Her eyes were bloodshot and glazed over from the amount of alcohol and drugs that were already in her system. Somehow, she still seemed to find it in herself to jump up and give Castiel a hug when she saw him. “Clarence! You actually showed up!”

Castiel adjusted the devil horns on her head, then held her at arm’s length. “You threatened me. You said you would kill me if I didn’t show. Remember?”

Meg giggled uncontrollably. “Oh, yeah. I did,” she snorted. She gave Castiel a once-over. “You looked so badass. You’re so good, but you look so bad. That is actually all manner of hot.” She grabbed his arm and pulled him down to her ear. “Too bad you’re gay. If you weren’t, I would order some pizza, and we’d move some furniture if you know what I mean?”  s he asked with a smirk.

Castiel just shook his head. “I think you’ve had enough, Meg.”

Meg waved him off. “Pfft. I’m fine. Get out of here. Go enjoy yourself. Live a little, choir boy.”

He rolled his eyes as he watched her almost fall over when she went to sit back in her seat. “Later, Meg.”

When he turned around, he realized he had somehow managed to lose Jo, Charlie, and Sam. He went back through the sliding door and started to search for the three of them. He found Charlie and Jo first. They were grinding up against each other out on the makeshift dance floor that partygoers had created. He smiled at the two of them as he watched them for a moment or two.   _ It’s about time they got there. _

He walked away from the dance floor and decided to go on a search for Sam. After a few minutes, he finally found him, up against one of the walls in the main hallway, with Ruby. She was wearing a sexy nurse costume.  _ So _ _ , _ _  that’s why he wanted to be Dr. Sexy. _

They were kissing so vigorously; it almost looked like they were trying to eat each other’s faces. Sam’s hands were grabbing at Ruby’s ass. Her arm was wrapped tightly around his neck as she brought him closer to her.

_ I’m going to be sick. _

Castiel looked around trying to find someone that was at least an acquaintance. He couldn’t find anyone that matched the description.  _ Well, I gave it a shot. _

When he got out to the front porch, he sat down on one of the rocking chairs, then began to scratch his head.  _ Fuck, this wig is annoying as hell. Eddie better not have given me lice or something!  _ He ripped off the wig, thoroughly disgusted by the thought of lice, then once more started to scratch his scalp fervently. When his hair was utterly mussed up and sticking straight up again, he finally felt comfortable enough to leave the porch. He put the wig in his trench coat pocket, then stood up to head towards the Impala.

Of course, that is the moment Alastair and Brady exited the house.

“Hey, cocksucker! I’m surprised you didn’t dress up as Tinkerbelle, you homo!” Brady exclaimed while slurring his words.

_ Great! Intoxicated psychopaths. My favorite.  _ “Really original, Brady.”

Alastair sneered. “What? You have a problem with strapping on some wings and waving a wand around for us? I figured you would enjoy playing with one of our wands.”

Castiel shook his head. “I don’t have to stand here and listen to this. Excuse me,” he said, then turned to walk away.

Brady grabbed his arm. “Did I say you could walk away, faggot?”

Castiel ripped Brady’s hand off of him and twisted it behind his back. He then used his full force to push him away. Brady tripped over himself as Castiel released him. “Leave me alone.”

“Oooh! Someone’s buffed up a bit. Hasn’t he?” Alastair asked as he laughed.

Brady got up off of the ground. “Yeah. I guess the faggot learned how to fight since last time.”

Castiel balled his fists at his sides.

Brady moved to tackle Castiel, who in turn sucker punched him. Brady hit the ground with a thud, then stayed there.

“I said leave me alone,” Castiel threw his hands up with frustration. “Why the fuck is that so hard for you to understand?”

Alastair glared at Castiel. “I decide when I’m done. Not you.”

Castiel rolled his eyes and faced the Impala. He saw Dean getting out of the driver side.  _ Why the hell is he getting out of the car? _

“Cas! CAS!” Dean shouted.

That’s all the warning Castiel got before Alastair turned him around and slammed his fist into Castiel’s face. The force of the hit caused him to face plant on the front lawn of Meg’s house.

“I make the rules, you fucking faggot! Not you!” Alastair reared back and kicked Castiel in the stomach.

The pain was excruciating. His insides felt like they were rupturing. He knew, no matter how much pain he was in, he had to get up. Castiel rolled away from the kick that Alastair was lining up for. He stood up too fast, making him slightly unsteady on his feet. He wasn’t sure if he could take another hit.

Dean appeared from behind him and punched Alastair so hard; he could hear Alastair’s nose break. “What the fuck is wrong with you?! What part of leave him alone do you not understand, Al?”

_ Al? _

“So ,  your answer was to punch me?” Alastair asked as he spat blood onto the lawn.

“Well, I would have shoved my foot up your ass. I just didn’t want to ruin my shoes,” Dean fired back.

Castiel shook his head as he held his arm over his stomach. “Al?” he asked.

Alastair sneered at Castiel. The blood dripping from his nose made him look more like a serpent than he ever thought was possible. “Oh, Dean didn’t tell you? We go  **way** back. Don’t we, Dean?”

All the color had drained from Dean’s face.

Castiel’s brain short-circuited. “What?”

“Cas…”

_ No… _


	21. Chapter Twenty-One

“Ugh, I shouldn’t have eaten so much,” Dean said out loud to himself. He put his fist to his chest and burped.  _ Shit! Heartburn… _

Dean took a quick glance in his rearview mirror and noticed Cas was outside on the front porch. He was sitting on one of the rocking chairs, scratching his head furiously.  _ He’s friggin adorable! _ By the time Cas was done, Dean’s favorite mess of dark brown hair was just as wild as the day he met him.

Cas put the monstrous sin of a wig into the pocket of the tan trench coat and stood up. He was facing the Impala. Dean’s insides started to do somersaults.  _ Is he coming over here?!?! _ Before he could truly get his hopes up, Alastair and that rancid blonde asshole exited the house.  _ Eventually, I’ll find out his name. _

After a bit of conversation, Cas made a move to walk away. The blonde grabbed his arm. Dean was ready to exit the car until he saw that apparently, Sam was right. Cas can defend himself.  _ Shit… Well, that’s one down… _

Cas and Alastair were glaring at each other as they continued to have a far from polite discussion. Dean knew in his gut that shit would hit the fan the second that Cas would turn his back on Alastair. He got out of the car and faced the house. Cas was standing near the edge of the lawn staring at Dean. Cas did not realize that Alastair was stalking up behind him.  _ Fuck! I’m not gonna make it in time! _ “Cas! CAS!” Dean shouted.

Within seconds. Alastair had grabbed Cas’ shoulder, turned him around, and knocked Cas to the ground.  _ SON OF A BITCH! _ He ran towards the house. He heard Alastair shouting something at Cas as he kicked him in his midsection.  _ Fucker usually wears steel-toed boots.  _ He watched as Cas just barely avoided the next kick that would have connected with his ribs.

As soon as Cas was on his feet, Dean was right behind him ready for a fight. He didn’t give Alastair a chance to get another hit in. He reared back his fist and punched Alastair in the face. He could hear and feel his nose break under his fist. “What the fuck is wrong with you!? What part of leaving him alone do you not understand, Al?”

“So, your answer was to punch me?” Alastair asked as he spat blood onto the lawn.

“Well, I would have shoved my foot up your ass. I just didn’t want to ruin my shoes,” Dean fired back.

“Al?” Cas asked.

_ Fuck… No… Not now!!! _

The grin that spread across Alastair’s face was more than mischievous. More than spiteful. He was aiming for malice, and he was about to hit his target with deadly accuracy. “Oh, Dean didn’t tell you? We go  **way** back. Don’t we, Dean?”

Dean felt sick.

Cas face was a blank canvas. “What?”

_ I’m so sorry... _ “Cas…”

The wave of emotions that were spreading across Cas’ face was heartbreaking. “You’re… you’re…” Cas stammered.

“Cas…”

“You’re friends, with HIM?!” Cas started to yell at the final word.

“I’d say we were once clo…” Alastair started.

“Al…” Dean growled.

Cas threw both hands in the air. He winced and crossed both of his arms over his stomach.

“Cas, let me take you to the hospital,” Dean suggested.

Cas narrowed his eyes at Dean. His mouth shaped in a clear expression of disgust. “I’m not going  **anywhere** with you!”

“You’re hurt…”

He shook his head. “I don’t care if I’m fucking dying. I am not going anywhere with you!”

Charlie and Jo appeared out of the front door. Charlie ran to Cas’ side and grabbed his head with both hands. Castiel tried to pull away from her. “What the fuck?!” Charlie attempted to attack Alastair; Jo showed up last second to hold her back. “You sick, son of a bitch! You didn’t fuck him up enough the last time?!”

“Charlie, stop, he’s not worth it!” Jo said as she tried her best to hold her back.

“NOT WORTH IT!!!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID?!?!?!” Charlie was screaming.

“Charlie!” Cas yelled loud enough for both of them to hear. The amount of pain he was in was completely evident in the way he was holding himself.

Charlie answered without taking her off of Alastair as he walked away. The blonde douche, who was now awake, was leaning on him. “Yes?”

“I need to go to the hospital. You have to call my mom.”

“Dean can take you,” Jo said as he pointed at him with her thumb.

Cas glared at Dean once again. “I’m not going  **anywhere** with him,” he hissed.

“Cas, please… just let me explain!”  _ I’m trying to fix this! Why do you never let me fix  _ **_anything?!_ **

Within a flash, Cas was in Dean’s personal space, his voice barely above a whisper. “Let me ask you a question.”

Dean nodded his head.

“You knew how I felt about him. Right?”

Dean nodded. “Yes.”

“You have obviously heard the way he has spoken to me on more than one occasion. You’ve seen the way I act around him. You know…” Cas started to take labored breaths, holding back what Dean knew were tears. “You know everything that I stopped doing because of something he  **obviously** did. Why didn’t you say something? Anything?”

“Can we talk someplace that is not here?” Dean asked. There was a crowd that was slowly starting to form.

“I already told you. I am not going anywhere with you,” Cas barked.

Charlie walked up behind him, her cell phone held to her chest. “Castiel? Your mom said that she wouldn’t be here for at least a half hour. Please, let Dean take us to the hospital. Your face is starting to swell. You’re clearly in an excruciating amount of pain. You need a CAT scan. Your mom can meet us there.”

“I don’t want to…” Cas began.

“Castiel, to be honest, I don’t care what you want. You’re hurt. I want you in that Impala in thirty seconds or so help me; I will put you in there myself!” Charlie roared.

Cas hit Charlie with a withering stare. Dean saw the exact moment that Cas conceded to his fate. “Fine,” he grumbled.

Charlie walked away as she put the phone to her ear. She was naturally filling Cas’ mom in on the plan.

“We need to find Sam. Did anyone see him in there?” Dean asked.

Cas huffed out a laugh with another wince. “Considering the position I saw him when I exited the house, I’d say it’s safe to assume that he’s with Ruby somewhere.”

“HE’S WHAT?!” Dean snapped.  _ I FUCKING WARNED HIM THIS WOULD HAPPEN! _

“I’ll go find him,” Jo offered.

“Thanks, Jo,” Castiel smiled.

“Cas, I know you don’t want to talk to me. I get it, but I have a feeling that Charlie wasn’t kidding. Can you come with me to the car? Please?” Dean asked. He was practically begging.

As if on cue, Charlie showed up. “What did I tell you, Castiel?! Get in the fucking car!!!”

“We’re waiting for Sam,” he replied.

Charlie scoffed. “I don’t care if we’re waiting for the pope! Get in the fucking car!!!!”

_ Shit… Note to self, do not piss Charlie off…  _ “It’s unlocked,” Dean mentioned to Cas.

Cas rolled his eyes. “Fine,” he groaned and staggered towards the car.

Charlie walked up beside Dean and glowered up at him. “I don’t know what you did, but if I find out you had any part in this, they won't find a body. You got that?”

Dean nodded. “Yes, Ma’am.”

Charlie' face screwed up in disgust. “Don’t call me Ma’am! God! You just made me feel like I’m sixty!” she shrieked and hurried off after Cas.

Sam was right behind Jo as they exited the house. His face was held in an expression of mild confusion. “What happened?” Sam asked.

“Exactly what I said was going to happen, asshole! I told you to stay with him! I fucking warned you this shit would happen! Why the fuck would you listen to me, right!?” Dean shouted.

“Is Cas okay?” Sam’s asked with concern.

“His face is messed up, and it looks like he may have been hit in the stomach or something,” Jo replied.

“He was kicked in the stomach by Alastair. Right after he punched him in the face,” Dean added to Jo’s previous answer.

Jo’s jaw dropped. “Are you fucking serious?!”

Dean face screwed up. “What? Yes. I’m serious. Why the fuck would I lie about something like that?” he asked. He turned to Sam with a grimace. “I told you to stick with him. All night. I told you. Instead, you were with that fucking bitch. The one everyone has been warning you about.”

“He was wandering around the house looking for us,” Jo defended Sam. “Apparently, Ruby all of a sudden said she had to go ten minutes ago and ran off.”

“How fucking convenient! She disappears right after Cas gets his face bashed in. Do you bel…”

“DON’T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE!!!!” Charlie screamed.

Jo, Dean, and Sam gave each other a quick look before they ran over to the Impala.

The doors creaked shut after everyone was piled into the car. “Which hospital?” Dean asked.

“Southside. Castiel’s mom works there. She said she will meet us there,” Charlie responded.

“Buckle up. I’m not planning on driving slow,” Dean ordered. As soon as he heard every buckle click, Dean did a quick “K” turn. Without a shred of guilt, he broke the speed limit and several other laws heading towards Sunrise Highway.

 

>>>>>>

 

“Castiel, take off your coat and lift up your shirt. I need to see what’s going on,” Charlie demanded.

“Charlie, we are in a moving vehicle, and it is dark out. You would need light to see what’s going on. That is a violation waiting to happen,” Castiel argued.

Charlie narrowed her eyes at Castiel as her lips formed a thin line. “I don’t remember asking, Castiel James!”

_ Ugh… I hate when she uses my middle name. _ Castiel winced as he slowly removed his trench coat and untucked his collared shirt. “Happy?” he croaked.

“Unequivocally,” she replied as she turned on the flashlight on her cellphone. Charlie scrunched up her nose when she finally got the light shining on Castiel’s stomach. “That is all sorts of gross, Castiel.”  

Castiel didn’t want to look at it. From the look on Charlie’s face, he may need surgery.  _ Just my fucking luck... _

“What the fuck was he wearing for shoes? Cement?” Charlie asked as she cringed.

“He usually wears steel-toed boots,” Dean answered.

“How would you know?” Jo and Charlie asked in unison.

“Oh, you didn’t know? Apparently, Dean and  **_Al_ ** go way back,” Castiel gibed.

“You, what?” Charlie snarled. “You’re friends with that animal?”

“Not anymore,” Sam answered.

Jo smacked Sam upside his head. “You fucking knew!?”

Sam started to rub the back of his head. “Not until yesterday at Walmart. Asshole came over to us and taunted Dean. They have a history. That’s it. Dean swore he was going to say something about it after I found out. Right, Dean?”

Dean stayed silent in the driver’s seat.

_ Of course, he wasn’t. Just another fucking manipulation… _

Sam flicked Dean on his ear. “Dean! Answer, jerk!”

Dean reached for his ear. “I’m fucking driving, bitch! You don’t hit the driver!”

“Then answer the fucking question, Dean!” Jo snapped.

“What do you want me to say? Nothing I say is going to make this better. I fucked up. End of story. I don’t get a second shot here. Or in my situation a third,” Dean said as he kept his eyes on the road. “I don’t get a chance to make this better. I should have said something. I was going to tell him tomorrow.”

_ What? On our first date, he was going to drop a fucking bombshell like that? _

“On your first date? Have you lost your fucking mind?” Jo asked, completely befuddled.

“Well, when else was I going to tell him?” Dean inquired. “Hmm? Answers? Suggestions? Seriously, I want to know. When should news like ‘Yeah, you know that guy? The one that I’ve heard assaulted you? Well, he and I used to be bros , ’ be given. Seems to me that no matter where or when shit would have hit the fucking fan!”

The car was silent.  _ I know… _ “When you told me you told him to back off. On the bus, when we were on our way back from Hofstra. The hours we spent texting each other. Earlier today, when I was cornered by Alastair. All of those were perfectly fucking good times. All of them, Dean.”

“Cas, I di…”

“Don’t give me some bullshit of ‘I didn’t know what to say.’ You just say it!” Cas yelled.

“Look. We can talk about this, but I am not doing it in this car with everyone listening,”  Dean retaliated.

Castiel leaned his back against the seat. “The time for talking about this is done. You had plenty of chances. All I’m hearing now are excuses. I’m done being manipulated for your enjoyment,” he mumbled.

“Cas , it’s not like that. You’ve got…” Dean’s voice broke. He cleared his throat.

Charlie cut him off before he could add anything more to the conversation. “Look, not saying that I am siding with anyone here, but I don’t think this conversation needs to happen in front of Jo, Sam, and me.”

“We’re here,” Sam said they pulled in front of the ER doors.

Charlie and Jo exited the backseat to help Castiel out of the car. He slapped both of their hands out of the way and tried to get himself out of the car on his own.  _ I’m not an invalid. I can take care of mys… _ “FUCK!” He screamed.

Charlie’s face was a mix of both frustration and concern. “You’re a stubborn ass, Shurley! You’re lucky I love you,” Charlie admonished as both she and Jo lifted him out of the car.

Castiel put most of his weight on Charlie and Jo as he exited the car. “I’m lucky I have you,” he smiled at both of them. He tried his best to ignore the pain that smile was causing him.

Sam and Dean exited the car. “Do you need help?” Sam asked.

“No. Thank you, Sam. I’ll see you at school,” Castiel grinned. “You head on home.”

Sam’s eyebrows furrowed in concern. “Are you sure? We can stay,” Sam offered.

“I’m positive,” Castiel declared.

“I’ve got him,” Charlie said as she turned to Jo. “Have Dean take you home.”

“Are you sure, babe?” Jo questioned as she leaned her head forward to look at Charlie. “I can stay.”

Castiel shifted his weight off of Jo and onto Charlie. “Seriously, you can go, Jo. Charlie’s got this.”

Charlie gave Jo a crooked smile. “See! We’re sure. Now give me a quick kiss goodbye so I can take him inside.”

Jo released Castiel and gave Charlie a chaste kiss before she entered the back seat.

“Cas, let me know…” Dean started.

“I think that our conversation in the car clearly states that I will not be contacting you. Just go. Now!” Castiel demanded.

The same pained expression Dean had made all of those weeks ago, in Music Theory, once again marred his otherwise beautiful face. It made Castiel sick to think that even after finding out Dean knows Alastair; it still kills him that he’s the reason for that look. That most of the anguish Dean was feeling is because of something Castiel was doing to him.

Dean’s head bowed. “I know… I know that I’ve hurt you. For that, I’m sorry. Please, just let me explain. At least give me that. Please?”

Castiel shook his head. “Not now, Dean. I can’t do this right now.”

Dean gazed deeply into Castiel’s eyes. His emerald eyes were pleading for forgiveness. “Whenever you’re ready, let me know. I’m not going anywhere.”

Once again, Castiel shook his head. “I can’t. Just go home, Dean,” he faced Charlie. “Ready to go inside?”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “I’ve been waiting for you, Shurley.”

He spared one final glance at Dean.  _ Why didn’t I listen to everyone when they warned me about you? _

Dean gave Castiel a doleful smile as he entered the Impala.

_ It’s because you’ve never wanted to listen when it comes to him.  _ Castiel bowed his head and felt tears forming at the brims of his eyes.  _ And you never will… _


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two

“So… Plan on explaining a few things to me, Dean?” Jo asked.

“No.”

“‘No,’ is not going to cut it here, Dean. Spill. Or I will find a way to get you to talk,” Jo ordered.

Sam turned around to look at Jo in the face. “He doesn’t have to talk if he doesn’t want to. You know how he is when it comes to this sort of stuff.”

“I don’t remember asking you, Sam,” she snarled.

Dean huffed out a breath. “There’s nothing to say, Jo. I don’t have anything that is going to make this better,” Dean said as he looked at Jo through his rearview mirror.

She furrowed her eyebrows at him. “I didn’t ask for you to make things better. I asked you to explain to me what the hell just happened.”

Dean gripped the steering wheel. “I know Alastair.”

Jo huffed out an almost silent chuckle. “I gathered that much. How?”

“I’m sorry, but that’s none of your business,” Dean snapped.

“He’s Lily’s cousin,” Sam announced.

Dean punched Sam in the arm without looking at him. “What the hell, man!?” _Thanks a lot, dick._

“Lily?” Jo asked. “Who the hell is Lily?”

 _I guess Ellen didn’t share any of that shit with Jo._ “An ex.”

“She’s the re…” Sam began.

Dean punched him in the arm again. “So help me, Sam, if you don’t shut the fuck, the next one will be in the face.”

“Why am I not allowed to know?” Jo questioned.

Dean could hear the pout before he saw it in the rearview mirror. “Jo, there is some shit I don’t share. Lily, is one of them. I fucked up hard when it came to her,” he said as he shook his head. “Alastair was part of that mistake. Knowing what I know now…” Dean paused to take a deep breath. “I’ve made a shit ton of mistakes, this one… this one keeps getting worse.”

“How could you ever be friends with a dickhead like him, Dean?” Jo asked with apparent revulsion.

 _Jesus! I was never a huge fan of this guy. Now everyone is acting like we were the best of friends._ “I was never truly his friend, Jo. I knew him because of Lily. That’s it.”

Jo scoffed. “Well, regardless, Dean, you couldn’t have chosen a worse person to have any form of association with when it comes to Castiel.”

 _No shit!_ “I’m aware of that.”

“No. I mean like a fucking disaster. Do you have any idea what that prick did to Castiel?” Jo inquired.

“Yeah, my old bus driver told me he used to brag about how he assaulted him in the gym locker rooms one year,” Dean explained as he continued to look at her in the rearview mirror.

Jo huffed out a sardonic chuckle. “Assaulted is one way to put it.”

Dean furrowed his eyebrows as he focused his attention back on the road. “What does that mean?”

“Not my place to say,” Jo replied.

Dean looked back at her. “You can’t say something like that and expect me to drop it.”

Sam put his hand on Dean’s shoulder. “Dean, I think what she means is that it’s up to Castiel to tell you what happened.”

Dean peered over at Sam. His eyes were wide with fury. His lips were pressed tightly together in a thin line. Sam’s entire being was telling Dean to drop it.

_You know what happened? How?_

Dean pulled into Jo’s driveway without saying another word.

“I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” Jo said with a smile that hardly met her eyes

“Bye,” Sam and Dean said in unison.

Jo gave the two of them an almost imperceptible grin. “I love it when you guys do that. Bye.” She slid out of the back seat and gently closed the door behind her.

Dean waited until Jo was inside of the house before he put the car in drive and made his way back home. “Okay… What happened?”

“What?” Sam asked with evident confusion.

“What happened between Alastair and Cas? You clearly know something I don’t.”

“Think about it, Dean.”

Dean could feel Sam’s eyes on him. He thought about it long and hard and still, nothing came. “I’m obviously missing something, Sam. Just tell me.”

Sam let out a sigh as they pulled into the driveway. “‘That’s a nice way of putting it.’ and ‘It’s not my place to tell you.’ can only mean one thing, Dean.”

With an expression that clearly stated “ _get to the point,_ ” Dean waited for Sam to finally answer his question.

Sam bowed his head and shook it. When he finally spoke his words were uttered in a soft and hollow breath. “Dean… Alastair…” Sam looked Dean in the eyes; they were filled with evident apprehension and regret. “He raped Castiel.”

Every single piece of candy Dean had eaten earlier that night made a reappearance as he opened the driver side door and vomited up the poison of Sam’s words.

 

>>>>>>

 

“Charlie, I can fill out the paperwork on my own. I don’t need you to do it for me,” Castiel grumbled as they sat in the waiting room of the ER.

“Castiel, you have already mentioned, on more than one occasion, that your vision is blurred and that you are having a hard time focusing on anything without wanting to vomit. I am filling out the paperwork for you until your mom gets here.” There was no room for argument in Charlie’s tone. She was in charge.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Fine.”

Unfortunately for Castiel, the ER was busy. He was still waiting to be seen by a nurse so they could take his vitals. _I just want to go home and curl up into a ball._

Becky walked in through the entrance of the ER.

“Mom!” Castiel called out.

When her eyes landed on him, she covered her mouth with her left hand and sobbed. She ran over to Castiel and Charlie and knelt at his feet. She gently cupped the side of his face that was not currently swollen and cried. “Oh, my poor baby!”

“Mom, I’m okay.” He grabbed the hand that was holding his face and gave it what he hoped was a comforting squeeze before he released it. “It could have been a lot worse.”

Becky wiped tears from her eyes. She ground her teeth and glared at Castiel. “Did you file a police report yet?”

“We got here about five minutes ago. So far, we’ve had his ID scanned, and we’ve started to fill out his paperwork,” Charlie answered for Castiel.

“I’m not filing a police report,” Castiel declared.

“You’re what?!” Charlie shouted.

“I’m not filing a police report. What good has that ever done for me in the past when it comes to him?” Castiel demanded.

Becky took a deep breath. “The police report is for your protection. Charlie said that he and Brady were also injured?”

“Yes,” Castiel replied.

“Filing a police report gets your side of the story on record just in case they try to file a suit against you. Just trust me on this, sweetie,” Becky said as she squeezed his hand. “I’m going to go see if I can get you in there sooner rather than later. I’ll be right back.”

Within a minute, Becky was back with her coworker, Tessa, to take Castiel into the back. Becky was able to get Charlie into the back, so she didn’t have to stay out in the waiting room.

He was taken to one of the many beds that were lined up around the emergency room. Becky pulled over one of the carts and started to take Castiel’s vitals. “Tongue,” she ordered as she stuck the thermometer in his mouth.

“Ma, I dun hab a feber.”

“Shh…” She took out the thermometer and went back to work. She took his blood pressure, took some blood, and asked him some questions about his condition. When she lifted up his shirt to listen to his lungs, she lost her mind. “OH, MY FUCKING GOD!!!”

Tessa ran over. “What’s wrong?”

“Look! We need to take care of this now!” she yelled. Her head snapped towards Castiel as she glowered. “Why didn’t you say anything about this? You have internal bleeding, Castiel!”

“We’re still waiting on orders from Dr. Roberts, Becky. I can’t just take him to run tests without them,” Tessa replied.

Becky pursed her lips. Her nostrils flared as she narrowed her eyes at her coworker. “Where is she?”

“Becky, you know how it gets on Satur…”

“WHERE IS SHE?!” Becky shouted.

“If you calm down, you can follow me. I know you’re stressed, and I would be, too, but I can’t take you to her if you don’t take a deep breath and calm down,” Tessa explained as she rubbed soothing circles into Becky’s back.

Becky took a few deep breaths. “Take me to her.”

Tessa and Becky walked towards one of the many hospital doors that led to wherever the doctor was.

“Huh…”

Castiel turned to Charlie and tried to furrow his eyebrows and instead flinched due to the pain. “What?”

“Nothing… Just, for a little woman, your mom is scary as hell sometimes,” Charlie said with her eyebrows raised. “I’m happy I’ve never pissed her off.”

“At this point, you’re family. I don’t know if there is anything that you could do to piss her off that much. She’s only flipped out on me like that three times in my entire life.”

“Really? Only three?” Charlie asked with a smirk.

“Hey! I’m a good kid!” he smiled brightly before he winced. “God, my face hurts.”

“It’s seriously gross…” Her face sobered. “To be honest, I’m surprised you’re even still functioning right now. Your stomach, Castiel… I can understand why she’s freaking out right now.”

“I know,” Castiel agreed as he bowed his head. “My insides feel like they’re on fire, I’m nauseated, I can hardly see out of my left eye, there is a sharp pain in my side that won’t go away, and my head feels like it’s going to explode. Besides that, I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest and thrown into a blender. It’s been a spectacular day.”

“Castiel,” Charlie breathed with a sigh as she wiped a tear from his face.

 _I didn’t even know I was crying. Shit…_ He looked up at her. “I’ll feel better when all of this,” he said as he slightly motioned his right hand up and down over himself, “is fixed.”

Becky showed up next to his bed out of nowhere. “I got the tests ordered. We’re heading to the CAT scan,” she explained as she started to get things ready to transport him to the machine. She faced Charlie and put a hand on her shoulder. “I hate to do this to you, but you need to go outside to the waiting room. When the tests are done, I will let you know what’s going on. Okay, sweetie?”

Charlie looked like someone kicked her puppy. “Promise me you’ll keep me posted.”

“I would never leave you in the dark,” Becky promised. She smiled sweetly and patted her gently on her cheek.

“I’ll see you soon, bestie,” Charlie said as she kissed Castiel on his right cheek.

 _That’s if I don’t end up in surgery._ “Bye, Charlie.”

 

>>>>>>

 

“I’m going to kill him,” Dean growled as he paced in front of the couch in the living room.

“Boy, will you sit down! You’re making me dizzy with this pacing shit,” Bobby demanded.

Dean stopped and glared at Bobby. “Did you not hear what I told you?!”

“I hear ya, son. I’m just telling you that all of this pacing back and forth is not going to change the past. So, sit down!” Bobby barked.

Dean sat down next to Bobby and put his heads in his hands. “Bobby, I fucked up.”

Bobby placed a hand on Dean’s shoulder. “Look, Dean. You’re not him. You didn’t know what he did. Right now… Well, Castiel is upset you lied to him and kept your past with Alastair a secret. You can come back from that.”

“How can I do that without telling him about Lily? About everything? He’ll want nothing to do with me after I tell him.” _I should just fucking give up… This black cloud is always going to be following me… Why do I even bother?._

“You can’t give up, Dean. You don’t know if the truth is going to do anything but fill in a few of the blanks for him.”

Dean sat up straight and gave Bobby a bitch face Sam would be jealous of. “Pfft. Yeah, I’m sure finding out about me being an ex-addict and that Alastair was my dealer is really going to turn him on.” Dean rolled his eyes. “‘Hey, Cas! Guess what!? I used to shoot up and fuck that demon you hate’s cousin,’ definitely would turn me on. Ooo, baby,” Dean scoffed. _Yeah, everyone wants a guy like me…_

Bobby took his hand off of Dean’s shoulder and scowled. “Dean, you made mistakes. Everyone has. No one is perfect.”

Dean threw his head back into his hands. “Why do I even bother, Bobby?”

The smack on the back of Dean’s head was completely unexpected.

“Ouch! What the hell?!”

“Stop acting like a moron and realize everything that you have to offer to this world! You made a mistake. Think of everything you’ve done since then!” Bobby berated.

Dean narrowed his eyes at Bobby. “So far, it seems like my mistake keeps getting worse,” he argued. He bowed his head and let out a deep breath. “I’m just like my father.”

“You’re a better man than your Daddy ever was. Don’t compare yourself to a man who drank himself to death and abused his kids.”

Dean huffed out a sardonic breath. “Mm-hmm.”

Bobby groaned. “I’m done arguing with you. If you’re going to wallow in self-pity and not listen to a word I have to say, I can’t help you. I’m done trying to get you to believe me.”

Dean sat quietly as he listened to Bobby stomp off towards his room. He sat on the couch for a while wondering what his next step should be. He didn’t have any way of getting in touch with Charlie. It was killing him that he didn’t know what was going on when it came to Cas. He could tell by the way Charlie’s expression changed when she was looking at Cas’ stomach that he was seriously injured. The only things he could and wanted to do was find Alastair and bash his head in.

The only problem was, if he really did worry about his future, prison for assault was not going to look good on any application.

 

>>>>>>

 

While Castiel was waiting for the tests to come back, he filed a police report. Officer Stover said that he would let them know the results of his investigation once he had a chance to talk to Alastair.

_He’s going to get away with it… Always does. He always finds a way._

Becky and Dr. Cara Roberts approached Castiel when the results of the different tests they had run. His mom’s held expression was somber. Dr. Roberts was smiling softly at him.

_Fuck… This isn’t going to be good._

“Okay… good news and bad news, Castiel. Good news, we can fix you. Bad news, you need surgery.”

_Great…_

Dr. Roberts looked down at her clipboard and started to recite her findings. “We need to get you into surgery immediately. The kick caused some internal bleeding. We have to find where the bleed is so we can stop it. From what the scan is showing, it is probably from a rupture to your spleen. Luckily we’re able to get you into surgery within the next hour. Now, your orbital bone is broken, and you have a mild concussion. That’s why your vision is blurred, and you feel sick to your stomach. There’s not much that can be done there.”

Castiel sighed. “How long?”

“How long for what?” Dr. Roberts asked. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Recovery time. How long am I going to be here? How long am I going to be out of school?” _If I’m stuck here forever, I’m going to scream._

“Well, in regards to how long you’ll be here, a week. Unfortunately, maybe more depending on your progress. We want to avoid sepsis,” Dr. Roberts explained. She shrugged and looked up quickly before she directed her attention back at Castiel. “Which I’m not gonna lie, that is a possibility with any surgery.”

Castiel nodded his head slowly to keep himself from vomiting. “How long am I going to be out of school?”

“Probably until the beginning of December. Again, it really depends on your overall progress. Worst case scenario, beginning of January. Best case scenario, the very end of November or the first week of December.”

_Christ…_

“You're also going to be out of work for a while, too. Your mom told me you work at the library?”

“Yes,” Castiel confirmed.

“You’re going to have to notify them that you probably won't back until the end of January. Unless of course, they can give you a desk job or something that doesn’t require you to do anything. When I say anything, I mean anything. You are not allowed to lift anything or move around too much. You don’t want to pull any stitches. Which also reminds me, you can’t participate in gym or any sports when you go back to school,” Dr. Roberts said as she jotted down a few things on her clipboard.

Castiel smiled. “No gym?”

Dr. Roberts looked up and gave Castiel an enormous grin. “No gym.”

 _FUCK YEAH!!! NO SWIMMING!!!_ He did several strange internal fist bumps. _I really should not be happy about that, especially considering the reasoning behind it._

“Okay… So, Tessa will be over soon. She’s going to be the one who takes you over to surgery. I’ll see you after,” she promised with a smile.

“Thank you, Cara,” Becky said with a gentle touch on Dr. Robert’s arm.

“Anytime, Becky. I’ll see you both later.” With a final grin in both Castiel and Becky’s direction, Dr. Roberts exited the ER.

“Have you been keeping Charlie posted?” Castiel asked.

Becky nodded as she smoothed out Castiel’s hair. “She’s still in the waiting room. Gabriel is going to be coming to pick her up soon. Michael’s in New York on business. Gabriel was spending time with him in the city. He said he was going to catch the next train out of Penn. He should be here within the hour to take her home.”

“Good,” he said with a nod of his head. “I don’t want her to be here all night.”

“It’s all taken care of, sweetie. Don’t you worry about it.”

“You should go home, too, mom.”

Becky barked out a laugh. “That’s hysterical, Castiel. I’m not going anywhere.”

“You need sleep. I don’t want you to lose it on my account.”

“Castiel, you are my son. I don’t care what you say. I am staying here with you until I know exactly what is going on. You can tell me I need sleep. You can tell me that I don’t need to be here, but my place is here. I’m not leaving you alone. I am going to be here before, during, and after your surgery.” Tears started to fall from Becky’s eyes on to her cheeks. “No matter how old you are, you’re still my baby. I’m not going to let you go through this alone. Okay?”

Castiel gave a crooked, melancholy smile. “Yes, mom.”

Becky sniffled and coughed to bring back some of her composure. “Okay. So, that’s settled.”

Just as Dr. Roberts promised, it didn’t take long for Tessa to show up to take him to surgery. “Hello, Castiel. The anesthesiologist is ready for us. The OR is set and ready for you. So, it’s time to go,” she said with a soothing smile. She turned to Becky. “We’ll let you know when he’s under and we’ll give you surgery progress and findings. I’ll see you in the OR waiting room.”

Becky gave Castiel a quick kiss on his forehead. “I’ll be here the entire time. I’m going to check on Charlie, and I’m going to give your brother a call. Your father wanted an update, as well. I’ll be here when you wake up. I love you, Castiel,” she said as she gave him another quick kiss.

“I love you, too, mom.”

Becky and Tessa nodded their heads at one another before Becky turned on her heels and headed for the exit to the ER waiting room.

“All right, Castiel. Time to go,” Tessa announced.

_Here we go..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please be advised next week is GISH, so I will not be posting due to GISH madness. I will return to my regular schedule of every Wednesday the week after. Good luck, fellow GISHers. May the odds be ever in your favor :D


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How was everyone's GISH? Mine was interesting... I got a tattoo that says "Yourself Getting A Tattoo" and spent hours making a birdhouse. *Shrugs* Oh, well. Lmao  
> Sorry, I am late for my postage. I got carried away writing and forgot what day it was. GISH threw me off. I will be back to my normal schedule next week. Love you all! Enjoy!

**Sam: Is he okay?**

**Charlie: Are you asking for you or him?**

**Sam: That’s not fair. He’s one of my best friends. Of course, I’m asking for me.**

**Charlie: He needs surgery, and his left orbital is broken. He should be going into surgery any minute now.**

**Sam: Do they know what’s wrong?**

**Charlie: Cas’ mom didn’t give me all of the details. Earlier when she saw his stomach, she mentioned that there is definitely internal bleeding. That’s all I know.**

**Sam: Keep me posted. Please.**

**Charlie: I will. Gabriel is heading to the hospital to take me home soon, but Cas’ mom promised that she would update me regularly. So when I know something I’ll text you.**

**Sam: Thanks, Charlie.**

**Charlie: No problem, Sam.**

 

**> >>>>>**

 

Charlie had been freaking out for most of the night. The night had started out on a high note. She was spending the night with her girl, dancing the night away. What brought her out of her perfect bubble was when she noticed the amount of commotion that was happening near the front door. A bunch of people were screaming about some sort of fight going on outside. When she ran out and saw that it was Castiel, her entire world came to a screeching halt.

She had been there through everything with Castiel. She was in the hospital when he received multiple stitches all over his body in eighth grade. She was there when Castiel found out that they could not charge Alastair with sexual assault due to his ironclad alibi. No matter what, she was always there.

Finding out that Dean, the person that she was just starting to trust, had some sort of past with Alastair, was a shock to her system. She was ready to maim him. Castiel had been single for years. He lived his life that way on purpose. There were always a few small crushes, but nothing life-changing or affirming. However, Charlie knew that not even Aaron compared to what Castiel feels for Dean.

Seeing Castiel broken, all over again, in the hospital, was heartbreaking. The past few weeks, Castiel was coming back to life. Just by observing the way he moved, the way he carried himself, she could tell that he was starting to feel whole again. Now, once again, all she saw was an empty vessel. The Castiel that only hours ago was finally coming back to the world was gone. The last couple of weeks were forgotten.

Becky was keeping her posted as she stayed in the ER waiting room, but she wanted to be behind the scenes with him. She knew that there was only so much that could be done. She technically was not family, in the legal sense of the word, so her rights were limited. It was a bittersweet moment when Becky told her that Gabriel was coming to take her home. She wanted to stay at the hospital, but she also knew it would be better if she went home.

Charlie didn’t honestly know what to say or do when Sam texted her to ask how Castiel was doing. Honestly, she had half a mind to tell him to go fuck himself. She liked Sam, but Dean was Sam’s brother. She didn’t know if she could trust what sort of information would be kept between them. Everything she had seen so far made her believe that he would give Jim Moriarty a run for his money in the manipulation department, and the psychopath department. If she were to be completely honest with herself, she needed and wanted more answers when it came to Dean. From what Jo had told her, she was not going to get answers. Which was thoroughly frustrating. She needed to solve the puzzle that was in front of her. If Dean remained silent, her metaphorical scratch would never be itched. Charlie knew if Dean hadn’t shown up when he did, Castiel would have sustained further injuries. Or , on an even more horrifying note, he could have died.

As soon as Becky entered the waiting room, Charlie was brought out of her internal revery and stood up. “How is he?”

Charlie could tell that Becky was embodying her nurse persona to protect herself from breaking down in the middle of the ER. “He is going into surgery now. I have to call Chuck. He asked me to notify him as soon as Castiel went into surgery.”

“Okay.”

Becky glanced down at her cell phone. “Gabriel should be here any minute. Last text I received was about twenty-five minutes ago saying he just got off of the train.”

As if he heard her talking about him, Gabriel walked into the ER. He quickly located the both of them. “How is he? Is he okay? What’s going on? Is he in surgery?” Every question was asked in rapid fire. He didn’t give either of them a chance to answer before the next one came out.

Becky put her right hand gently over his mouth to silence him. “He’s as well as he can be. He is on his way to surgery. He has internal bleeding. The punch to his face also broke his left orbital. It wasn’t a serious break, so we just need to wait for that one to heal on its own.”

Gabriel knitted his eyebrows, and his nostrils flared. “Alastair was the one who did this? Again?”

Charlie bowed her head. “Yes. I’m sorry. I should have stayed with him the whole night. I didn’t even know he was invited . ”  S he looked in between the two of them. “I seriously don’t know why Meg invited him. She hates him just as much as I do.”

“Maybe she didn’t,” Gabriel suggested.

“It was her house. Showing up where you’re not invited is rude,” Charlie stated.

Gabriel screwed up his face and shook his head. “Since when has Alastair ever cared what is and is not rude?”

“Touché,” she replied.

Gabriel softly placed his hand on Becky’s shoulder. “Are you sure you don’t want us to stay here with you?”

She nodded. “Positive. I have things handled here. After I call your father, I will be going to the OR anyway. It’s best if you just take Charlie home.”

“Okay, mom. Just making sure you’re okay.”

Becky placed her hand over Gabriel’s. “Sweetie, he’s my son. Of course, I’m not ok. Still, I have to be strong. I have to be here for him. This isn’t about me. This is about him and what he needs. Just like if something happened to you, God forbid, it wouldn’t be about me. You kids, you’re my life. My world starts and begins with the three of you.”

“I think what he means, Mrs. Shurley, is that you have to take care of you , too,” Charlie added.

“I’ll take care of me when my son is home. Until then, I have someone, who regardless of what he says, needs me. You two get out of here. I’ll talk to you both later,” she said as she kissed both of them on their cheeks.

“See you at home, mom. I love you,” Gabriel declared as he gave her a bear hug.

When he released her, Becky turned to Charlie and hugged her. “Thank you.”

Charlie choked out a sob. “I don’t know why you’re thanking me. If I had stayed with him the entire time , he wouldn’t be in here tonight.”

Becky kissed her head. “Don’t blame yourself for the actions of evil people. You are one of the most caring and selfless people I know, Charlie Bradbury. Never forget that.”

Charlie could feel tears streaming down her face. “I let him down, Mrs. Shurley. It’s my fault he’s in here.”

Becky pushed her away so she could get a good look at her. “Did you punch him or kick him?”

“No, but I left…”

Becky shook her head vigorously. “No. I don’t want to hear it. You’re not the one who hurt him. You were enjoying a party that you thought did not include that asshole on the guest list. There is no reason for you to feel guilty.”

“Apparently, Castiel knew he was,” Charlie revealed.

Gabriel’s jaw dropped. “He knew?! Why didn’t he tell anyone?”

“He did. He told Dean,” Charlie replied as she looked at the floor. “If Dean didn’t show up when he did… I don’t even want to think about what would have happened.”

“Dean was at the party?” Gabriel asked.

Charlie looked up at the two of them. “Yeah. He sat outside of the house just in case something happened.”

“Castiel did mention that someone was there to help him when he was talking to Officer Stover. He said he didn’t know who they were. That was Dean?” Becky questioned.

If Castiel didn’t mention that Dean was there, Charlie knew that she needed to keep most of what happened to herself. “Yeah. He said that he had a feeling that the guy would try to pull something, so he sat outside just in case.”

Becky made an almost imperceptible nod of her head. “I’m assuming he’s the friend that you said was driving Castiel to the hospital as well.”

Charlie nodded her head as a way of confirming Becky’s assumption.

Gabriel made a sour face. “Why didn’t Dean tell anyone?”

“He told his brother, Sam, who was also at the party,” Charlie answered. She shook her head with complete frustration over everything that had happened that night. “Look, all of this happened within a span of ten minutes. Castiel went and said hi to Meg. Jo and I, we didn’t go out to the porch to greet Meg. We just waved at her from the back door before we went to go dance. Sam was pulled away by Ruby the second she saw him. He didn’t have a chance to say hi to Meg. I’m assuming that Castiel didn’t want to interrupt any of us, so he just went outside to escape the noise of the party. That’s when Alastair and Brady found him.”

“That bitch always seems to be right in the heart of it. Doesn’t she?” Gabriel asked with a growl.

“Which bitch? Meg?” Charlie inquired.

Gabriel screwed up his face. “No. Not, Meg. Are you kidding me? Meg would never do anything to hurt Castiel. Chick loves him as much as you do,” he replied. “I’m talking about Ruby.”

Charlie shook her head. “No. In this situation, I just think she has had her sights set on him for a while and finally had a chance to get him alone.”

Becky looked at her cell phone. “As much as I would love to continue to stand here with the two of you, I have a husband to call and a son to look after. You two get home safe.”

“Okay, you’re right. We should go. Come on, Charlie,” he said as he put a hand on Charlie’s shoulder. “Bye, mom.”

Becky waved at the two of them. “Goodbye. I will see you later.”

“See you soon, Mrs. Shurley,” Charlie replied.

“Come on, Red. Let’s get you home,” Gabriel said as he directed her out of the ER and towards the parking lot.

When they reached Gabriel’s car, Charlie paused before she entered the front seat. “Gabriel?”

He looked up at her without answering.

“My mom doesn’t expect me home tonight. I was originally going to be spending the night at your house. I don’t want to go home. Can you just take me back to your house? I don’t want to go home,” she pleaded with a sob.

“Of course, Charlie. Just make sure to call your mom in the morning.”

“Thank you, Gabriel,” Charlie said as she sniffled.

“No problem. You’re family after all,” he admitted with a gentle smile. “Come on. Let’s go home.”

 

>>>>>>

 

After four hours of pacing, Becky was ready to barge into the operating room and demand answers. Becky loved being a nurse, but her knowledge of the field had her thinking of every horrible outcome she could ever possibly imagine. Fear was making her irrational. She knew that in the end, Castiel would be okay.

The night had been a complete wreck. She was so excited for her son. This was supposed to be a big weekend for him. Of course, that asshole, Alastair , had to ruin it. Becky despised Alastair. She hasn’t liked him from the moment she met him in Castiel’s fourth-grade class. He was just as much of a little demon, then as he was now. The fact that he had now assaulted her son twice, both occasions putting him in the hospital, she had already planned the exact way she would kill him. She didn’t want to feel this way towards another person, but some people just deserve it.

Becky called Chuck regularly to let him know what was going on. He , of course, just like her, had not slept a wink since finding out what had happened at the party. It killed Becky that Chuck wasn’t there with her. She knew he wanted to be there just as much as her, but someone had to be home to watch Hannah. Because Becky was a nurse who worked at the hospital Castiel was in, Chuck was the one who stayed at home with their youngest.

When Dr. Roberts finally appeared, Becky was on edge. Her outer appearance was one of strength, but inside she was screaming for answers. “How did everything go?” she asked calmly. Her voice was definitely steadier than she was expecting it to be.

“Well, the bleeding was from the ruptured spleen , w hich we already assumed it was. We were able to save most of it, so that is a good thing. We did find another bleed elsewhere, but it was an easy fix. Overall the surgery was pretty standard. There were no complications during surgery, so he should be fine,” Dr. Roberts said as the corners of her lips curved up into a small smile.

Becky let out a massive sigh of relief. “Oh, thank you. Thank you!” she exclaimed as she gave the doctor a huge hug.

Dr. Roberts hugged her back. “Becky, you’re crushing me.”

Becky released her immediately. “Oh, geez. I’m sorry, Cara. I’m just… You have no idea how happy I am that he is okay.”

Dr. Roberts gave Becky a crooked smile. “I have an idea. The way you talk about your kids, I can only imagine the amount of stress this must have put you through.” Dr. Roberts put a hand on Becky’s back. “I have to get back in there, but I just wanted to let you know what’s going on. He should be awake in a few hours when the anesthesia wears off.”

“I’m not going anywhere, Cara. I’m going to be here no matter what time he wakes up.”

Dr. Roberts nodded. “Well, you can go sit with him while he sleeps if you’d like. His room will be ready soon.”

“Okay. I’ll be here whenever it’s ready. I have a phone call to make.”

“I’ll send Tessa to come to get you when the room is ready. I have rounds to make after I finish up with Castiel,” Dr. Roberts said with a gentle smile.

Becky nodded. “Okay. I understand. Thank you again, Cara.”

“Well, I hope that nothing like this ever happens again, but anytime.”

Becky waved goodbye and said an internal prayer that nothing happens like this again.

 

>>>>>>

 

**Charlie: Hey, guys. Just wanted to let you know. Castiel made it out of surgery.**

**Charlie: He should be okay.**

**Jo: Thank, God!**

**Sam: Thank you for letting us know, Charlie!**

**Charlie: I’m so happy he’s okay. I haven’t slept.**

**Sam: Neither have I.**

**Jo: Ditto.**

**Charlie: Becky said he should be up in a few hours. I’ll keep you two posted.**

**Sam: Thank you again, Charlie.**

**Charlie: You’re welcome. You two get some sleep.**

**Jo: I’ll try.**

**Sam: Yeah, sleep is probably not gonna happen.**

**Charlie: Ttyl.**

 

**> >>>>>**

 

**Sam: He’s been harassing me for hours about him, Jo. I don’t know if I should tell him or not.**

**Sam: I told Charlie that this isn’t about him. Which it’s not, but she has no idea what he’s been like. He’s a wreck, Jo.**

**Jo: I understand where you’re coming from. However, I also understand where Charlie is coming from.**

**Jo: He’s going to have to let Castiel come to him. Which right now, it’s obviously not happening.**

**Sam: I know that. I get it. Still, Jo, you don’t seem to get it either, I have never seen him like this. He’s lost it.**

**Sam: He and Bobby fought earlier. After that, Dean locked himself in his room for a couple of hours until he started harassing me about Castiel.**

**Sam: I need to at least tell him he’s okay. I don’t have to tell him everything. He deserves to know** at least  **that.**

**Jo: Look, if it gets him to stop harassing you, then do it. But that’s it. Don’t tell him anything else. The rest has to come from Castiel. Got it?**

**Sam: Okay. I’ll text you later after I talk to him.**

**Jo: Okay. Ttyl.**

 

**> >>>>>**

 

Wrecked didn’t even begin to describe how Dean was feeling. He had been blaming himself for everything that had happened to Cas. The events of the night were playing in his mind on repeat for hours. He told himself he should have been quicker. The moment he saw Brady grab him, he should have been out of the car. Whether Cas could defend himself or not, Dean knew that Alastair fought dirty. The second Cas told him that Alastair was going to be there, he knew this was going to happen. Still, he did nothing to prevent it.  _ I’m just as much of a monster as he is. _

His need to know what was going on with Cas was outweighing his rationality. He had been berating Sam for hours about the night's events. Not only was he blaming himself for what happened, he felt that Sam was also equally at fault for everything that happened. He knew that he should try to cut the kid at least a little slack, but he couldn’t stop himself.

When he wasn’t scolding him over letting Cas out of his site, he was bombarding him with questions on how Cas was doing. He figured out that Sam would probably have a way to contact Charlie. If anyone would know what was going on, it was her. Dean knew Sam would reach out to Charlie . Cas was one of his friends after all. Sam, however, outright refused to admit what he knew.

Without any knowledge of what was going on with Cas, Dean found himself, on more than one occasion that night, in tears. All he knew was Cas was in pain, not only physically but emotionally. The expression of complete and utter sorrow that Castiel had given him before they said goodbye was still weighing heavily on his conscience. Dean felt physically ill knowing that he had caused that. When Cas was in pain , he could feel it like a knife to his heart. He had known for weeks he should be honest with Cas. He knew keeping his past a secret from him was wrong, but still, he said nothing.  _ It’s because you’re a fucking coward. _

Just as Dean’s tears once again started to fall, there was a knock at the door. “Go away, Sammy.”

“I’m not going to stop knocking until you let me in.”

True to his word he continued to knock on the door until Dean was ready to beat the living shit out of him. Dean wiped his tear stained face and opened his door. “What?”

He watched as Sam took in his appearance. From what Dean could tell by Sam’s expression, he looked pitiful.

“Do you plan on saying something, or did you just want to annoy the hell out of me?”

Sam's face was etched with confliction. He took a deep breath. “He’s okay.”

Dean felt a small amount of the weight that had been crushing him all night lift. “He’s okay?”

“Yes. He’s okay,” Sam replied and turned to go back to his room.

Dean grabbed his shoulder and spun Sam around to face him. “Woah, where are you going? You’re going to tell me he’s okay and that’s it?”

“Yeah, that’s it. I felt you deserved to know at least that much,” Sam responded as he turned once againto walk away.

Dean held onto Sam’s shoulder. He refused to let him go until he knew everything that happened. “What does that mean? I’m beyond happy that he’s okay, I think that much is evident. Still, I deserve to know at least that much? Why am I not allowed to know what happened after we dropped him off at the hospital?”

Sam huffed. “Look, I’m lucky to know what I know. Unfortunately, I am now guilty by association. You fucked up, Dean. It’s all up to Castiel from here on out what you get to know and what you don’t. You can harass me all you want, but I am not losing my friends over your fuck up.” He ripped himself free from Dean’s grasp and stormed off to his room. He slammed and locked his door behind him.

Dean sat down at the edge of his bed and put his head in his hands. The weight that was slightly lifted after finding out that Cas was okay was back. He kicked his door shut and let the tears come.  _ Again, why do I even bother? _


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four

_ How can you stand to even look at yourself? _

Sunday and Monday were indescribably horrible. Knowing that Sunday was supposed to be their first date and Cas was sitting in a hospital room, refusing to talk to him, was more than he could bear. Dean tried to stay calm. He was desperately trying to remain patient, but he needed answers now.

He was hardly paying attention in class all day on Monday. When he woke up that day, he honestly thought about saying fuck it and going back to bed. Instead, he spent the entire day trying to decide whether or not he should go to the next class.

By the time he got home on Monday night, he was ready to give up on everything. He tossed his backpack into one of the corners of his room, slammed his bedroom door, and face planted onto his pillow. Within five minutes, someone was knocking on his door. “What!?”

“Can I come in?” Sam asked sheepishly.

Dean let out an over exaggerated sigh. “Yeah,” Dean answered as he sat up to face the door.

The door opened just a crack. Sam popped his head in without entering. “How was school?”

Dean threw Sam a bitch face. “Does it sound like it was a good day?”

Sam’s face fell. “I’m sorry. That was a stupid question.”

Dean huffed out a breath as he closed his eyes and shook his head at the ceiling. “What do you want, Sam?”

“I was just checking on you. I know that the past couple of days haven’t been easy on you.”

Dean looked down at his feet. “I’m fine.”  _ Liar. _

It was Sam’s turn to give him a bitch face. “We both know that’s not true.”

“What do you want me to say, Sam? Do you want me to pour my heart out to you or some shit? Cause you know and I know that’s not happening.”

“I just want you to be honest with yourself, Dean,” Sam pleaded. “We both know how much he means to you. You’ve proven that more than enough times.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Well, apparently that means nothing to him. I’m the enemy. Remember?”

“He knows, Dean, and it does mean something to him. Just give it time.”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Sam. “How would you know how he feels?”

Sam stared at the floor to avoid Dean’s gaze. “I visited him today.”

Dean’s eyes widened exponentially as he stood up. “You visited him? How is he? Is he okay? What did he say?”

Sam crossed his arms over his chest and raised an eyebrow at Dean. “Yeah. You’re definitely completely fine with how things are right now.”

“Sam,” Dean growled.

Sam shook his head in exasperation. “Yes, I visited him. He’s okay, just trying to heal. He didn’t say much of anything. He was a little loopy from the pain medication,” he said with a crooked smile. “He booped me on the nose a couple of times. It was kind of funny.”

Dean had to control the overwhelming wave of jealousy that washed over him. He didn’t know whether he wanted to flip his mattress and throw Sam out of the window or scream with anguish. After making the rational decision just to take a deep breath, he sat down on his bed, put both of his elbows on his knees, and rubbed his palms together before lacing his fingers together. “I’m happy he’s okay.”

Sam sat down next to Dean on his bed. He put his hand on his back as a form of comfort. “Give him time, Dean. He is in no condition to talk right now. He needs time to heal and sober up, preferably.”

Dean shrugged off Sam’s hand and walked over to where he tossed his bag earlier. “Thanks,” he grumbled.

“Don’t give up, Dean,” Sam mumbled.

Without even bothering to look back at Sam, Dean said, “Goodnight, Sammy.”

He heard Sam let out a deep breath before he stood up. “Night, Dean,” Sam muttered and shut the door behind him.

Dean grabbed the staff book he had been writing music for the band in and started to scribble a few notes and lyrics.  _ Angsty rock. You’re fucking hopeless. _

 

>>>>>>

 

If Castiel were held at gunpoint and ordered to recall everything that happened the day after his surgery, he would have told them to shoot. He couldn’t remember a single thing. All he knew was that the world was filled with beautiful colors and shiny lights. Of course, he knew he was hallucinating from the pain medication, but he wished the world could be that fluffy and comforting all of the time.  _ I can definitely understand how someone could get addicted to this feeling. _

By the time night fell, he knew he had seen his family, which of course had included Charlie, but he had no idea what was said. He had a feeling that whatever he did say was hilarious because all of them, especially Gabriel, could not stop laughing at him. He vaguely recalled asking someone to pull his finger. He had no idea why he did it. At the time he thought it was just as hilarious as the others did. He was thankful for the pain medication. He knew he wouldn’t have been laughing without them.

The second day in the hospital was just as fuzzy, but not as bad. He was happy to see Mrs. Moseley, Jo, and Sam. He was worried when Charlie told him Sam was coming to visit. He wasn’t sure whether or not Dean would decide to show up or not. Then he remembered that Dean had school all day on Mondays. So, there was no chance that Dean would be able to make it to the hospital , a t least not during visiting hours.

Dean and Castiel still needed to discuss everything that had happened that night. Castiel needed answers. He needed to know how and why Dean knew Alastair. The very thought of the conversation was unnerving. Castiel didn’t know whether his questions would be answered with honesty or lies. However, the more time Castiel had to himself to think, the more he realized that he wanted things to work out with Dean. He had proved, on more than one occasion, that Castiel means more to him than anyone else he has been with. At least, that’s a point that Sam was trying to convey to him over and over. Still, Castiel didn’t want to have it while sitting in a hospital bed.

By the time Halloween arrived, Castiel was done being at the hospital. Even though he was no longer in the ICU, it still didn’t even come close to being home. He was nauseated half of the time because of the pain medication, and he missed his bed. The hospital bed was hardly conducive to a good night's rest. If he could toss and turn without wanting to scream, he knew that would be precisely what he would be doing at night.

What Castiel indeed despised, more than the bed and the hospital is the stress he could see his mother was under. Becky tried her best to hide it, but she wasn’t fooling Castiel. She had hardly left his side since she first arrived at the hospital three days earlier. Castiel had to beg his mom to go home and take a shower and get some rest on Sunday evening. He knew she had to work on Mondays. He pleaded with her, stating that she wouldn’t be any good to her patients if she didn’t get some rest. Of course, just to prove a point, she switched with one of the other nurses, Billie, on Monday to be near Castiel. By Tuesday, he was elated to hear that his mom needed to leave the hospital to take care a few errands.  _ Thank, God! She needs to get the hell out of here. She works here. She doesn’t have to live here _ _ , _ _ too. _

Not long after Becky had said goodbye to Castiel, Charlie appeared on her laptop and a backpack. She snuck in some candy and popcorn for their traditional Halloween movie marathon. Charlie let him chose the movies this year. He knew it was because he was in the hospital and she was being nice, but he was not going to look a gift horse in the mouth.

“Which one first, bestie?” Charlie asked with a wide grin.

“Hmm…” he paused as he looked at each of the movies. “Well, I know you and I both enjoy  _ Beetlejuice _ , but can we do  _ Silence of the Lambs _ first?” he asked while making a boo boo lip. “Please?” He added in puppy dog eyes for effect.

Charlie rolled her eyes. “Alright,” she said with a sigh. “I don’t get you and this movie.”

“Have you read the books yet, as I told you to do?” Castiel inquired.

She looked to the side with an utterly guilty expression. “Yes…”

Castiel barked out a laugh. “Liar.”

Charlie threw her hands up. If it was possible for someone to roll their eyes with their entire body, that was exactly what she did. “Look, I started to read  _ Red Dragon _ , but it was so creepy, Castiel. Francis Dolarhyde is a nut job. I didn’t even get to the part where Hannibal is introduced. I can’t even imagine what he’s like.”

“You didn’t even give the series a chance!” Castiel exclaimed. “Francis Dolarhyde is an incredibly complex character. Yeah, what he did was sick, but there is a reason for his delirium.”

Charlie shook her head. “I don’t know. Someone who breaks mirrors and then shoves them in his victim's eye sockets, that’s not my thing. I can deal with the Lord of the Rings. That is fantasy. From what you’ve told me, Thomas Harris, based all of his psychopaths on people that really existed. That’s fucked up. Plus, I read like half of the book, and your precious Hannibal was only mentioned.”

“He has only a small part in that book.  _ The Silence of the Lambs _ is where you see a lot more of him. The relationship between him and Agent Starling is twisted. By the time you read  _ Hannibal _ ...” Castiel huffed out a huge breath. “Just give it another try. Please?”

Charlie listened with her arms crossed over her chest and her eyebrow raised. She took a deep breath. “Fine. Let’s watch this creepy ass movie.”  

“The reason why I like  _ Silence of the Lambs _ so much is that Anthony Hopkins, even though he doesn’t have the red eyes or the extra fingers, completely embodies the character. He was incredibly on point with his portrayal of Hannibal Lecter. He deserved and earned his Oscar,” Castiel explained with conviction.

“Well, again, Dr. Lecter’s number one fanboy, can we watch this creepy ass movie already?”

“Yes, please,” he beamed.

“You’re so weird.”

“Yeah, but you love me.”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Yeah, you’re lucky, mister.”

Castiel gave Charlie a sweet smile. “I sure am.”

They watched the movie in silence until right after Miggs threw his cum at Agent Starling. “Now, that’s just nasty!” Charlie yelped with a grimace. “I knew it was coming, but it’s fucking gross.”

“Well, Hannibal takes care of him for her,” Castiel replied with a wicked smile.

Charlie looked at him with a baffled expression. “You’re one twisted mister; you know that?”

“Yes,” he deadpanned.

Silence once again fell over the room until Castiel noticed Charlie was worrying her bottom lip out of the corner of his eye. “What’s wrong, Charlie?”

“I saw Dean today.”

Castiel felt his heart drop to the pit of his stomach, where it then exploded, and the butterflies started to try to break through his stitches. “Oh?”

“Yeah.”

He continued to watch her chew on her bottom lip.  _ Care to elaborate, Charlie? _ She still didn’t say anything. “And?”

She glanced over at him and quickly averted her eyes.

“Charlie!?”

She turned her attention back to him. She looked like someone kicked her puppy. “What?”

Castiel huffed out a sigh while he rolled his eyes.  _ You cannot be this clueless, Bradbury.  _ “You’re the one who brought him up, and now you’re not saying anything,” he admonished and hit pause on the movie. “Talk,” he ordered.

“I think Sam is right. You need to talk to him.”

“Okay…? Care to share what you mean by that?” he questioned with a bemused expression.

She started to examine her knotted fingers. “He didn’t even look at me, but Castiel, he’s… broken.”

Castiel felt as if someone ripped his heart from his chest and then squeezed. “I can’t talk to him right now. Not while I’m in here. I should be out of here by Sunday. I will message him then. I just… I can’t do that right now.”  _ Even though I feel just as lost as he is… _

Charlie examined Castiel’s face then furrowed her eyebrows. “You’re both hurting. I can see it. I’m not saying him hiding the whole Alastair thing from you is okay. You know I’m still pissed at him about that. Still, we both know he probably saved your life on Saturday. You should say thank you for that.”

Castiel closed his eyes and took a deep breath to keep his emotions under control.  _ You will not cry. You will not cry! _ “I will message him on Sunday, Charlie. I’ll talk to him then. I can’t do this right now. I understand how he feels, but he needs to understand how I feel and give me time.”

Charlie nodded her head and let out a sigh. “If he asks, and I don’t think he will, but if he does, I will tell him that.”

“Thank you,” he smiled.

“Now, let’s get back to watching this fucked up mess of a movie,” Charlie said as she pressed play.

Castiel shook his head and set his attention back to one of his favorite thrillers.

 

>>>>>>

 

“Trick or Treat!” a group of kids screamed from the front steps of the Shurley residence.

Becky stopped dead in her tracks as the phone rang. The caller ID yelled out that it was the Suffolk County fifth precinct. “Chuck, can you pass out the candy to the little ones? I have to take this call,” Becky pleaded. Her eyes were wide with anxiety. She left the hospital early specifically for this reason.

“Of course, hun,” he answered, without hesitation, and carried the bowl over to the front door.

“Hello?” Becky asked as she answered to phone.

“Good evening, This is Officer Stover, I’m calling to talk to Mrs. Shurley.”

“Speaking.”

“Hello, Mrs. Shurley. So, I have some news on the police report your son filed.”

“Okay? What did you find out? Are those demons behind bars yet?” Becky inquired. She could hear the officer take a deep breath on the other side of the phone.

“Unfortunately, Mrs. Shurley, the charges have been dropped against Mr. Lucif and Mr. Brady due to lack of evidence.”

She scoffed. “Excuse me? Lack of evidence?”

“Neither of them were in the area at the time of the assault. A red light camera captured a picture of Mr. Lucif’s ‘18 Cadillac Escalade at around nine pm on Saturday in Jamaica, Queens. I also found out, during the investigation, that a security guard broke up a fight at about 11:15 at a gig they were attending in the area. Apparently, according to the security guards, Mr. Lucif and Mr. Brady were assaulted by two highly intoxicated audience members. The security guard took them to the local precinct where they filed a police report at around 11:45 that night,” he explained.

“You have got to be kidding me? You mean to tell me that these two, pardon my french, assholes, are getting away with assaulting my son?! For the second time!?”  s he asked with fury.

“Unfortunately, ma’am, we don’t have any evidence to convict the suspects. No one has come forward to confirm your son’s allegations. Without proof, there is no case. All of the evidence pinpoints their location in Queens at the time of the assault.”

Becky huffed out an exasperated breath through her nose. “Un-fucking-believable. So, basically what you’re telling me is my son, who is sitting in the hospital right now recovering from a ruptured spleen and internal bleeding, got hurt by his volition. That’s what you’re telling me? That he hurt himself?”

“No, ma’am. I would never say or imply that. The evidence is showing the assault wasn’t done by Mr. Brady or Mr. Lucif,” Officer Stover let out a sigh. “Look, ma’am, off the record; I can definitely sense that there is definitely something rotten in the state of Denmark here. However, my gut doesn’t mean jack squat. Hard evidence is what does it. We don’t have any,” he said before he took a deep breath. “I cannot even begin to explain how truly sorry I am about this, Mrs. Shurley.”

Becky could hear the sincerity in the officer’s tone. Still, sincere or not, those monsters were once again getting away with a crime against her son without even a slap on the wrist. “Officer Stover, what the hell is wrong with the world? My child is assaulted, not once, but twice, and still, nothing can be done. How is that justice?”

“Reasonable doubt is a double-edged sword, Mrs. Shurley. I am truly sorry,” Officer Stover admitted.

The honesty behind his tone was only making Becky feel worse. “Thank you, Officer Stover, for following up so quickly.”

“Goodnight, Mrs. Shurley. I wish you and your family only the best.”

“Goodbye, Officer Stover. Same to you,” she said and then hung up the phone. When she faced Chuck, all of the emotions she had been holding back for the past three days caught up with her. She sat down at the kitchen table and felt the levee of her strength break as her tears started to fall. The warmth of Chuck’s embrace only increased the volume and strength or her sobs. “What am I going to do, Chuck? What am I going to tell Castiel?”

Chuck held her tight and kissed the top of her head. “We’ll figure something out. For now, let’s give him time to rest and heal. When he gets home, we’ll explain everything to him.”

Becky pulled away from Chuck’s strong embrace and wiped the tears from her eyes. “I should probably message Charlie and tell her to hold off on saying anything about Brady and Alastair.”

Chuck nodded. “That sounds like a good idea.”

Becky took out her cell phone, attempted to take three solid deep breaths, and wiped away a few more stray tears before she once again looked at Chuck. “Maybe we should have moved like Aaron, and his family did.”

“Maybe we should have,” he admitted with a somber expression.

“Too late now.”

“Too late now,” Chuck agreed with a doleful smile.


	25. Chapter Twenty-Five

Being back at the school on Tuesday, knowing Cas wouldn’t be there, put Dean in a more foul mood than he already was. Everyone noticed . N one of them said a word. Rufus attempted to speak his mind. Surprisingly enough, Ellen was able to stop him. Dean could not fathom what she said to make him keep his mouth shut, but he appreciated it nonetheless.

Contrary to Charlie’s belief, Dean was not blind. He noticed Charlie watching him. He was pretty shocked at how often their paths crossed throughout the day. Every time he saw her, another piece of him fell apart. He wasn’t sure if it was for her own self-interests or if it was for Cas, but he tried his best to leave her alone. He had a million questions. More than likely, she would be able the answer at least half of them. Still, instead of asking her, he left her alone and continued to suffer in silence.  _ What would be the fucking point of asking her anything anyway? She wouldn’t answer any of your questions. It doesn’t matter how you feel about Cas. You’re the enemy. You betrayed her best friend. _

Dean knew patience was the key to winning Cas back. No one wanted to talk about shit like this while they’re in a hospital bed. Still, only knowing, “He’s okay,” from Sam, was not good enough. He needed to apologize. The more time he had to mull things over in his mind, the more he wanted to drop kick himself in the face. He was thoroughly aware it was physically impossible for someone to drop kick themselves in the face. Still, he liked to imagine he could.

That night, Dean went home and locked himself in his room. He didn’t eat, which was proof enough of how abysmal he was feeling. Again, just like Monday night, he grabbed his staff book and wrote a few more stanzas of a song. He could hear trick-or-treaters at the door . H e ignored them.

Wednesday was no better. He walked into the school at 7:12, which was late, and noticed that Alastair was back. He froze where he stood.  _ Why the fuck is he not in jail right now? _ The smug sneer on Alastair’s face explained it all. He didn’t know the details . H e just knew that somehow, some way, Alastair’s uncle was able to get the charges dropped.

Dean had been wondering why the cops had never shown up at his door. Cas’ mom would inevitably order Cas to file a police report. Dean was the reason why Alastair’s nose was fucked up. Why wouldn’t they come to his house to question him?  _ Maybe Cas didn’t mention that you were there? Maybe he was trying to protect you? Or maybe you should get your head out of your ass and stop getting your hopes up? He hasn’t messaged you once about anything. He obviously doesn’t give a shit about you. Why should he? _

Alastair made a move as if he was going to approach Dean until the warning bell rang.

_ Oh, thank, God! _

The expression Alastair shot him foreshadowed one thing, clear as a bell.  **_Later._ **

He spent the rest of the morning thinking about that look. There was nothing else on this earth he wanted less than a confrontation with Alastair. Especially given what happened on Saturday.

After the fifth-period bell rang, Dean knew where to find one of the people he promised he wouldn’t bother. He walked right up to the cafeteria and tapped Charlie’s shoulder before Sam had a chance to show up.

When she turned to face him, Dean watched as her expression morphed from one of panic to insouciance. “What do you want?”

“Can I talk to you? Please?” he asked. He knew this was borderline pathetic, but he didn’t have any other choice.

Charlie closed her eyes and let out a deep breath through her nose. When she opened her eyes, he could feel her frustration. “Yeah… Come on. Let’s talk before Sam gets here. He’s already enlightened me on the subject of you,” she admitted as she pushed him away from the cafeteria and down the hallway towards the music theory classroom. When they had reached the relative privacy of one of the small stairways, that led to the auditorium seats, she crossed her arms over her chest and at glared at him. “Okay, talk.”

Dean stared at his feet to avoid her scrutinizing gaze. “He’s okay. I know that. Sam told me at least that much. I just... I need to talk to him. I need to say I’m sorry. I know I fucked up. I know that I have no right to ask him to forgive me. Especially considering everything that Alastair has done to him over the years . ”  H e took a deep breath and stirred up enough courage to lock eyes with Charlie. “Everyone has a past. Unfortunately, Alastair and a bunch of other fucked up shit are part of mine. I swear I was going to tell him, but I just didn’t know how to tell him one thing without telling him all of the other things.”

She looked at him with a mixture of pity and sincere sympathy. “Look, Dean, you don’t have to tell me all of this. As I said before I dragged you over here; Sam has already clued me into how horrible you’ve been feeling.”

_ I’m gonna kill that kid. _

“Truth be told, Dean, I know how you feel right now without Sam saying a word to me. It’s written all over your face.”

Dean looked back down at his feet. “I… I just…”

“He needs time, Dean. I am not the one you should be speaking to about this. You should have this conversation with Castiel.”

Dean kept his head down and squeezed his eyes shut. “He won’t talk to me. He wants nothing to do with me,” he whispered as he shook his head.

Charlie put her hand on Dean’s shoulder. She placed her head in his line of sight so he could see her. “That’s not true. He just needs time. Please give him that.”

Dean nodded his head. “I can continue to do that.”

Charlie took a quick peek up the stairway towards the hallway above. “I need to go to lunch.”

“Okay…”  _ This conversation did not make me feel any better. No surprise there. _

“Later, Dean.”

“Bye, Charlie.”

Charlie ran up the stairs and turned left towards the cafeteria.

Dean climbed the stairs and walked out the door near Ellen’s office to his car. Luckily, the sixth period was also when he usually grabbed some lunch. No one would miss him. He crawled into the back seat and stared at the roof of his Baby’s interior. 

If he said he was done, he’d be severely understating his current disposition. He didn’t want to talk to anyone other than the one person who was currently avoiding doing precisely that. His patience was wearing thin. Dean always hated this time of year, and this situation was now added to a long list of shit he fucked up and will never be able to fix. He tightly squeezed his eyes shut and tried to repress all of the memories that he spent his short life trying to avoid thinking about.

It’s truly incredible how, when a few things start to go wrong, memories of every horrible thing that has ever happened started to come to life and tear a soul to shreds. Atrocious things that were never within anyone’s ability to control, instantly torture the person which had been damaged by those memories, to begin with. 

Dean knew that he was not to blame for most of the horrendous things that happened before his sophomore year of high school. If he were, to be honest, he knew that he wasn’t to blame for any of it. He always seemed to be able to place the blame and burden of everything that had happened on his shoulders.  _ Have it beaten into you enough times; you start to believe it. _

Dean knew what the next day was. It was the anniversary of the day his mother died. The short amount of time she was in his life was the best five years of his life. It was a life filled with peanut butter, and jelly sandwiches with the crust cut off, just the way he liked it. His stomach was filled with tomato and rice soup when he was sick. When she was gone, it was always a guessing game of when his next meal was while he had a cold. Or what was worse, he was still wondering when his next meal was going to be in general. She would say angels watched over her two boys as she tucked them into their beds and sang “Hey, Jude.” After the fire, Sam and Dean’s nights were filled with the sound of people fucking in the next room. Or worse, John screaming. 

Dean choked down a few traitorous tears as he tried to prevent all of the horrible memories of a hundred dingy motel rooms his tiny family was forced to live in. John no longer tarnishing the world with his presence was always a welcomed thought.  _ That prick deserved what he got. _ The scars that man left on Dean still disfigured him both mentally and physically. His hand reached for his back without his permission. He could feel the divets the belt buckle had left on his skin on his fifteenth birthday.

It wasn’t Dean’s fault that his mom died. He didn’t realize that the outlet had too many plugs in it. How was he supposed to know that could cause a fire?  _ I was only five for Christ’s sake! _ The Fire Marshal even confirmed that the wiring itself was faulty. How was that supposed to be within Dean’s control?  _ All he cared about was that it was my toys in those plugs. That made it my fault. _

There had been a small amount of hope for the first few days, in the hospital, after the fire. The external burns weren’t what killed her in the end. The damage from both the smoke inhalation and internal injuries from the fire destroyed her lungs and trachea. Eventually, the machines were keeping a vessel alive that no longer could sustain the soul inside of it. There was nothing the doctors could do.  _ At least you saved Sammy. Not that it ever mattered to him. _

When Dean heard the bell ring, he already decided that he was going home. He walked straight to the band room to let Rufus and Mick know that he didn’t feel well and he was going home. From the look on both of their faces, he knew they didn’t believe he was physically ill. However, considering his behavior over the past two days, Dean knew they were letting him go home due to emotional stress.  _ At least I don’t have to deal with Alastair. _

The idea of going home to nothing was both welcoming and terrifying. He didn’t want to be left to his own devices. His mind was not a place he wanted to be in at that moment.  _ You have nowhere else to go… _

 

>>>>>>

 

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite angel, Clarence.”

Castiel bowed his head and smiled. “Hello, Meg.”

She dragged over a chair to sit beside his bed. It made appalling scraping sound as it moved across the floor that made their skin crawl. “Sorry about that,” she apologized as she looked down at the chair with disgust.

“It’s okay, Meg. How are you?” he asked with a crooked grin.

Meg huffed out a laugh. “Shouldn’t I be the one asking you that?”

Castiel shrugged. “Well, maybe, but I can still inquire as to how you are. Even if I am currently sitting in a hospital bed because of one of your party guests.”

There was a fire in her eyes. “I swear to you, Castiel, I did not invite him to my party. I don’t even know how he knew about it.”

Castiel cocked an eyebrow up at Meg. “Seriously? Meg, there were at least seventy-five people at your house on Saturday. How could he not know?”

“Castiel, everyone I invited was sworn to secrecy. I would never endanger you!” she confessed. “Especially, considering how much I pushed you to be there. I wanted you to have fun for once in your high school life.” Meg bowed her head. He could see her shoulders shaking as she started to cry. “This is all my fault. I’m so sorry.”

Castiel eyebrows furrowed and he scrunched his nose. “How on earth is this your fault?”

Meg threw her head back as she wiped off a few stray tears. Her vulnerability was palpable as she took a deep breath. Her entire demeanor was entirely out of character for her. “If I wasn’t fucking shit faced, I would have been a better hostess and would have seen the prick was there.”

Castiel shook his head in exasperation. “No offense, Meg. I walked into that party expecting it.”

She threw her hands up and stood up. The chair made the same bone-chilling sound as it moved behind her. “That’s exactly my point! What the fuck is wrong with me? How could I let something like this happen to you!? I let this happen to you not once but twice!”

Castiel’s head fell back before he turned it towards her with a bitch face. “You were going to a different middle school when he cornered me in the locker room. You didn’t  **let** anything happen to me. You had and have no control over what that asshole does.”

Her mouth formed a thin line, and her nostrils flared as she put her hands on her hips. “I could have been there for you. Both times I could have and should have been there for you.”

“You’re being stupid, Meg. You are not at fault for any of this.”

She shook her head. Her face etched with confusion. “I want to know who the hell told him about the party. I’ll fuck them up. I’ll torture them. Won’t even get my hands dirty,” she growled without a modicum of sarcasm in her voice.

_ Sometimes she scares me. _ “Well, let me know when you find out. Even though that’s probably never going to happen.”

“I’ll find them and torture them. That’s the least I can do. ”

Castiel looked down at the hospital standard knitted blanket covering his legs and picked at a stray strand as he chuckled. “You’re seriously deranged,” he stated as he shook his head. He peered over at her. “Luckily enough for you, I love that you are.”

She threw a crooked smile in his direction. “Yeah, but if I don’t torture these people, who will?”

“Charlie.”

“Touché,” she agreed as she nodded her head. They both stared off into their own space for a few moments until Meg turned to Castiel with a wicked grin. “You wanna put on some completely appalling Spanish soap opera and make up our own lines as we watch it until visiting hours are over?”

Castiel made a hearty chuckle. “As long as you don’t make everything instantly pornographic, like you did last time.”

“Ugh, you’re no fun,” she jested playfully.

“I know. I’m almost entirely vapid with a dash of dreadfully dull,” Castiel concurred sarcastically.

Meg shrugged before she grabbed the remote. “Well, at least you admit it.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Just put on the ridiculous show.”

“With pleasure,” she beamed.

 

>>>>>>

 

By the time Sam and Bobby walked through the front door, Dean had burrowed into the sheets of his bed and didn’t plan on ever coming out. He tried watching TV, writing music, reading, and playing a few games on his phone. Also, pathetically enough, he tried masturbating. He thought it might release a few endorphins and help improve his mood. However, every video he decided to watch didn’t interest him in the slightest. The only time he felt aroused was when he pictured lust blown blue eyes looking up at him. None of those videos came close to what he wanted.  _ Nothing has come close since Cas handed you Ellen’s keys outside the auditorium on the first day of school. _

There was a soft knock on his door. 

“What?”

“Can I come in ? ” Sam asked.

“No.”

“Dean, please? You have to come out of your room,” Sam implored with a sigh.

“No.”

“Why not?”

Dean huffed out a breath as he rolled his eyes. “I don’t know. I’ve got personal crap I’m taking care of in here.”

Dean could hear Sam’s responding bitchface. “What does that mean, personal?”

_ Ugh, pain in my ass.  _ “Did you have a stroke? Vocabulary! Personal. As in my own grown-up personal, I don’t know, crap!” he berated.

Sam sighed. “Keep lying to yourself and others, Dean. It’s been working out splendidly so far.”

“Just go away, Sam.”

He heard Sam’s sock covered feet pad down the hall to his bedroom before the door slammed shut.

_ You’re such an asshole, Winchester. He doesn’t deserve your bullshit. _ He rolled over and closed his eyes trying, and once again failing, to push every painful memory out of his mind.

 

>>>>>>

 

Being in a hospital room twenty-four hours a day, only getting up to pee, could start to drive anyone crazy. One of the most significant contributors to his current impending insanity was he kept trying to go to the bathroom without help. Without fail, every time, he was either yelled at, or he would be in excruciating pain for a couple of hours after. By Wednesday he had refused to take pain medication because the hallucinations were starting to terrify him. So , he was suffering through the pain.  _ It’s better than seeing spiders on the walls or watching his loved ones _ _ ’ _ _ smiles turn into a head with only teeth. I’ll live with the pain. _

Castiel appreciated the sentiment of everyone worrying, but it was starting to get on his nerves. The company was welcomed, the pained expressions were not. Even Meg, who is usually indifferent to the span of human emotions, looked at Castiel with agonizing concern. He needed everyone to stop smothering him with worry. He wanted them to treat him like Castiel, not a porcelain doll or an infant.

He hated himself for loving when everyone left him alone at the end of the day. The relative silence was something he was beginning to treasure. He always enjoyed his personal space. Now, he prayed for it every day by the end of the day.

The past couple of nights, after everyone went home, he would stare at the messenger app on his phone. He would contemplate for a while whether or not it was a good idea to message Dean. He had read the text Dean sent to him on Sunday morning at least a thousand times.

 

**Dean: Sammy told me you’re okay. I won’t push you to tell me more if you don’t want to talk. Just know that I’m here when you’re ready, and you’re in my thoughts. You’re always in my thoughts. Feel better, Cas.**

 

He could hear Dean saying those words to him as if he were sitting right next to him. By Wednesday evening, it was harder for him not to send Dean a message. Even though the talking part of their relationship had only started around two weeks prior, he missed him. He missed sending him stupid text messages about nothing. He missed their flirty banter. There were a million reasons why he wanted to talk to Dean and make things work. He just couldn’t bring himself to send him a message while he was still in the hospital bed.

At around two in the morning, when he should have been sleeping, Castiel grabbed his phone and reread Dean’s message. He was beyond shocked when three dots started to dance in the bottom left corner of the screen.  _ Dean,  _ he smiled brightly.

 

**Dean: I miss you, Cas. Every second. I’m sorry. Please forgive me…**

 

Castiel’s heart was beating wildly in his chest. He read the new message twenty times before he said fuck it and hit call.

Much to his chagrin, it went straight to voicemail. He felt his heart stop and then shatter. _Where did you go? I miss you_ _,_ _too!_ He made sure his phone was on vibrate as he fell asleep. _If he doesn’t try to call me,_ _I’ll try again in the morning._ He drifted off into a restless slumber.

 

>>>>>>

 

He didn’t know why he chose to go there of all places. As the Uber driver pulled in front of the residence, he sent one final text and shut off his phone.  _ Not going to need it anyway. _  He gave the driver a substantial tip and walked up the granite pavement toward the back door.

He knocked on the door three times and waited. When the door opened , he was filled with both dread and exhilaration.

He was met with a salacious smile “Dean?”

Dean bowed his head and took a deep breath before he looked into the seafoam eyes he swore he would never lower himself to see ever again. “Hey, Lily.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry...


	26. Chapter Twenty-Six

Just being in Lily's presence again was intoxicating. Dean didn’t know whether he wanted to run or keep his feet planted firmly on the ground. He was leaning towards running.

She grabbed the front of his shirt and ripped him into the house.

The warmth and strength of her embrace were making him sick.  _ Why am I here?  _ He grimaced.  _ Heroin, remember? _

“Oh, I’ve missed you so much!” She released him and held both sides of his cheeks to get a good look at him. A scowl painted her face. “You seem different, babe. What’s wrong?”

Dean shook his head to escape her hold. “I’m fine.”

“Oh, honey, I’ve never believed that for a second,” she assured him as she wrapped her arms around the back of his neck forcing them to stand closer together. She grabbed his hair and crashed their lips together.

The kiss put him on the edge of losing what little food he had been eating the past few days. When Lily licked the seam of his mouth, Dean hesitantly opened for her. She was taking complete control of the kiss that he was hardly participating in, to begin with. His hands found her hips, and he gently pushed her away from him. “That’s not why I’m here, Lily.”

Lilith’s eyebrows raised in recognition of his request. A sinful smirk covered her face, lighting up her eyes. “Oh, I’m so sorry, Dean. I don’t have any. I could call Al and ask him to bring some over,” she offered as she motioned towards her room. She turned to face him once more as her lips curled into a devilish grin. “It is a school night though. So, he’s probably sleeping,” she whispered. Every minuscule change in her expression insinuated that she knew exactly what Dean has been up to.

“I’d prefer not to see him right now. Thank you.”

Both of her arms wrapped back around his neck as she pouted. “Oh, baby, has Al been a bad boy?”

Dean softly removed her arms from around his neck. “Understatement.”

Lilith’s demeanor changed to one of apparent frustration and annoyance. Dean was avoiding physical contact. She never appreciated that. “What are you doing here, Dean?”

Dean bowed his head. “I don’t know. I guess… I didn’t know where else to go,” he mumbled.

She huffed out a breath. “Why come here? You obviously don’t want anything that I have to offer you.”

Dean balled his fists and squeezed them tight. He lifted his head and glared at her.  _ You’re here. She’s right! Too fucking late now. _ He grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her to her room. He made a decision by going to her house. It was a bad one, with every passing second that was becoming more apparent, but he still made his decision.

When they arrived at her room, he threw the door open and tossed her onto her bed. She grabbed the bottom of her nightshirt and lifted it over her head.

Dean’s stomach turned as he looked at the naked form presented before him. He plastered on a smile that evidently was good enough to convince Lily that he was into what was about to happen.  _ If you’re gonna fuck up, might as well do it right. _

He spent the next few hours fucking the wrong person. Hating himself a little more every time she’d cum.

Dean would be lying if he said he didn't imagine it was Cas when he finally came.

 

>>>>>>

 

**Bobby: I just a call from Cesar. He said Dean never showed up today after I left. Did you see him before you left for school?**

**Sam: No. He was supposed to take me to school. I knocked on his door a couple of times, but there was no answer.**

**Bobby: I’ll check with Ellen. Thanks, Sam.**

 

>>>>>>

 

**Benny: He didn’t show up for class. I tried calling him, but it went straight to voicemail.**

**Sam: Yeah, I tried calling him too. He turned his phone off. I’m worried about him.**

**Benny: Me, too, brotha.**

 

>>>>>>

 

**Castiel: Hey, Sam. I hate to bother you about this, but do you know where Dean is?**

**Sam: No. Why? Didn’t you say you needed time?**

**Castiel: He messaged me last night. I tried to call him, but he didn’t answer. Then I tried calling him this morning when I woke up. Same thing.**

**Castiel: I’ve tried texting, and I called him again about an hour ago. No reply or answer.**

**Castiel: Is he okay?**

**Sam: That’s a good question.**

**Castiel: What do you mean by that?**

**Sam: He disappeared, Castiel. You’re the first person to say you’ve heard from him within the past sixteen hours.**

**Sam: What did he say?**

**Castiel: Fwd >>Dean: I miss you, Cas. Every second. I’m sorry. Please forgive me…**

**Sam: I’ll text you later.**

**Castiel: What happened?**

**Sam: I’ll text you later.**

 

>>>>>>

 

**Sam: Do you remember where she lives?**

**Benny: What? Who?**

**Sam: I know where he is. Do you remember where she lives?**

**Benny: Fuck… No. I’ll ask around. I’m sure I can find out from someone.**

**Sam: Hurry.**

 

>>>>>>

 

If he wasn’t disgusted with himself before, he was now. Lily was draped over his chest, snoring softly, naked, and dead to the world. Every time he tried to slip out from underneath her, she would wrap her arms around him a little tighter. So, instead of removing himself from her grasp, he stared at the ceiling and watched her ceiling fan spin. Dean lifted the arm that wasn’t currently being held captive by Lilith and wiped his hand down the length of his face.  _ What the fuck did I just do? _

No words could describe how glad he was that Lily was out of heroin. Dean knew his original plan was to show up and get so high he couldn’t remember who he was, where he was, or who he was with. The fact that he could still do all of those things was both a blessing and a curse. He was ecstatic that he had the mental capacity to get up and leave. At the same time, he was livid that he couldn’t power wash the last 12 hours out of his head.  _ How the fuck am I going to fix this? _

The clock near her TV said that it was 2:35 in the afternoon. Sammy would be on his way home from school.  _ Fuck, I was supposed to be at the shop this morning.  _ He glared at the body that still refused to remove itself from his.  _ Maybe if I chew my arm off, I can get away from her. _

Dean started to poke her.  _ I really gotta fucking piss. _ “Lilith.”

Seafoam green eyes blinked sleepily in his direction. She gave him a sweet smile. “Good morning, gorgeous.”

“Afternoon,” he corrected her. “But we didn’t fall asleep until around ten so…”

She stretched as she rolled onto her back exposing her, unfortunately enough, perfect rack. “Mmm. Yes. We. Did,” she moaned as she enunciated every word. “You were fucking  **_amazing_ ** last night! Even better than I remember.”

_ Yeah, because it wasn’t you I was in bed with last night… At least I imagined it wasn’t you.  _ “Thanks… I guess,” he droned.

“You’re most certainly welcome.” She uttered a sinful moan. “God, I’ve missed your dick!”

Dean rolled his eyes as he was finally able to escape her hold. “I gotta piss,” he mentioned as he pulled on his boxers, grabbed his phone, and walked to her bathroom. After he locked the door, he took pleasure in having a moment of quiet inside the privacy of her bathroom. He turned on his cell phone and was instantly bombarded with the vibrations of missed calls and texts.  _ Shit! What the hell!? _

There were fifteen missed calls from Sam, nine from Bobby, eleven from Ellen, and six from Benny. When he saw the last caller’s name, his heart stopped. Cas had tried to call him, four times. The first one was twenty minutes after he sent him the text the previous night.  _ Fuck… _ He looked around the bathroom.  _ Fuck! WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING HERE?!?! _

As he read through his texts, he realized it was definitely a blessing that he didn’t have a chance to fall off the wagon the previous night. He sent a quick text to Sam telling him where to find him. He promised him that he didn’t use and that if he was afraid that he did they could piss test him when he got home. His phone started to ring almost immediately after he sent the text.

“Hey, Sammy. I’m…”

“WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!?! DO HAVE ANY IDEA HOW WORRIED WE’VE BEEN?!?!?!?!”

Dean had to hold the phone away from his ear. “Sammy, I know you’re pissed but…”

“NO! PISSED DOESN’T EVEN BEGIN TO COVER IT, DEAN!” Sam continued to scream. He could hear the tears his brother was holding back. “How… how… how…” he stuttered. Sam was starting to lose the battle to contain his emotions. Sam cleared his throat. “Benny and I will be there in twenty minutes. Be ready,” he sniffled.

“Not even close to a problem, Sam.”

“Bye,” Sam replied and then disconnected.

Dean continued to go through his texts. Bobby only left one text telling him to call him as soon as he got a chance. Ellen didn’t leave any messages or texts.  _ She’s gonna kill me. _ Benny sent him a text as he was reading the ones he already sent saying he would be there soon. Then, of course, there was Cas.

There were four. The first one was from ten that morning.

**Cas: I tried to call you last night. It went straight to voicemail. I miss you too, Dean. I said I needed time. I think it’s been long enough. We need to talk. I want to talk. I just don’t want to do it in a hospital bed.**

_ You’re a friggin idiot, Dean… WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST DO?!?!?! _

The second was sent around fifteen minutes after the first.

**Cas: By the way, thank you. I never got a chance to thank you for saving my life. If you hadn’t been there, I would probably be dead. Alastair would have never stopped. If you genuinely do know him, you know I’m right about that. So, thank you.**

_ Is he thanking me? Why? I was too late to stop him... _

The third was sent around one.

**Cas: Also, don’t worry about the cops showing up unless Alastair filed a police report. I never mentioned your name. You saved me. You don’t deserve to be in jail for that asshole. I hope to hear from you soon.**

_ Well, that answers my “Why did the police never show up?” question... _

The final text was from an hour ago.

**Cas: Hey, I just spoke to Sam. He said you disappeared. I hope you’re okay. Text me when you get this. :)**

_ I’m an idiot… He didn’t care, huh, dumbass?  _ He sent a text back immediately.

**Dean: Sorry I disappeared. I’ll explain everything when I can.**

Within ten seconds there was a reply and a knock on the bathroom door.

“Dean? Are you okay? You’ve been in there for almost ten minutes.”

_ Oh, yeah… Still need to deal with… that.  _ “Yeah. I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Okay, I want a repeat of last night. So, be ready.” He could hear her grin.

_ Hell fucking no. Not gonna happen. Again... _

**Cas: I’m so happy to hear from you! Sam said you disappeared. I was worried. Are you okay?**

_ Salt on the wound, Cas… You’re a dumbass, Winchester. _

**Dean: I’ll explain. When do you get out of the hospital?**

**Cas: Sunday. You can visit me before then if you’d like :)**

_ I would sincerely like nothing more… But you’ll hate me. _

**Dean: I want us to be able to talk. You said that you didn’t want to do that in a hospital bed, which I understand entirely. It makes sense.**

**Cas: Okay… You can still visit me even though I don’t want to talk about that right now.**

_ Ugh, fuck… Cas, you’re not making this easy. _

**Dean: Patience. Trust me; there is no place else I would rather be right now than with you.**

_ Ain’t that the fucking truth! _

**Dean: Still, we need to talk. I won’t be patient if I see you and you need to heal. I’ll text you later.**

**Cas: I understand. Talk to you soon :)**

Once he was done reading that final text, he locked his phone and went into the bedroom. Lilith was still naked on top of the sheets. Waiting, ready, and completely willing to fuck him again. “I gotta go.”

The smile she was wearing instantly fell and turned into a grimace. “Excuse me?”

“I said I gotta go.”

“Who said you were allowed to leave?”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed.  _ Is this bitch fucking serious?  _ “I did,” he retorted as he grabbed his jeans from off of the floor and started to put them on.

“No.”

Dean buttoned his jeans and zippered them as he found his shirt. “I wasn’t asking.”

“Al is on his way.”

Dean stilled as he put on his socks.  _ Fuck… _ He tried to play it cool when he got back to getting dressed. “Good for him.”

“He’s not going to be happy that you’re leaving, Dean. I told him that you wanted to play and have fun. Now you’re leaving?”

He found his boots and started to tie the laces.

When she walked over to him and took a knee, she was finally wearing a nightshirt.

_ Ugh, go the fuck away…  _ “I don’t really care what he wants.”

“So, what? You fuck me, and now you’re going back to that little bitch boy you’ve been fawning over,” Lily growled.

Ice started to run cold through his veins. He finished lacing up the last boot, stood up, and got right in her face. “Let me make myself perfectly clear. First of all, you are just some easy piece of ass. I needed to fuck. I knew your drug riddled ass would be willing to spread your legs for me. Second, the little bitch boy, who is one of the bravest people I have ever met, has a name. It’s Castiel. You and Al can take your homophobic asses straight to fucking hell. I’m done with this and with you,” he snarled. “Thanks, by the way, for giving me the closure I needed,” he said with a wink.

“You’re a fucking dick. I’ll have your head for this, you worthless piece of shit.”

Dean grabbed his leather jacket from the ground and turned with a smirk. “You know, for someone who is a worthless piece of shit, I seem to recall you screaming my name quite a few times last night,” he bragged with a lascivious grin. He shrugged on his jacket and started to walk down the hallway to the back door. As he opened it, he spared one final glance at the cantankerous whore of his past. “Oh, also, last night sucked. The only reason why I was able to cum is that I was picturing Cas the entire time. Not you.”

“You’re a pig! Get out of my house!”

“With pleasure,” he announced with a wide grin and slammed the door behind him.

As he was walking down the driveway towards the sidewalk, Dean recognized Alastair’s Escalade instantly. What he wasn’t expecting was the little brunette that hopped out of the front seat.

“Fuck!” she blurted.

“Ruby?” he asked with a snarl. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I well…”

Benny and Sam couldn’t have shown up at a more perfect time if he planned it himself. “Ah, my ride is here!” he exclaimed with a little more zeal than he was expecting.

Sam hopped out of Benny’s truck as soon as he pulled up. “Dean!” he called.

“Ah, Sammy. Perfect timing, kid. Look who’s here!”

“Ruby?” Sam growled.

Ruby started to stroll towards Sam. “Look, Sam, I can explain.”

“It was you! Wasn’t it!? You told him there was a party!? What the fuck is wrong with you!?” Sam asked, enraged.

“I… Well…” she stammered.

“Holy fucking shit!” Dean bellowed.

“You’re the reason why he’s in the hospital, you bitch!” Sam yelled.

“That’s not true. I just…” Ruby began.

Sam cut her off by holding up his hand in front of her. “I don’t want to hear another word out of your mouth. Everyone was right about you. You are a rancid cunt!”

_ Ouch… _

“Now, Sam, that is no way to talk to a lady,” Alastair reprimanded as he finally graced them with his presence.

“Do me a favor , Alastair, shut your fucking mouth!” Sam fumed. “Dean may have broken your nose, but I will finish the job, I swear! Get the hell away from me, my brother, and my friends.”

“Excuse me? Did you just threaten me?” Alastair asked with a grin.

“No. That wasn’t a threat,” Sam answered. He took one step and was in Alastair’s face. “It’s a promise,” he hissed.

Alastair’s previous sneer turned into a scowl. He glared at Sam. “Watch who you’re threatening, kid. You have no idea who you’re dealing with.”

“I’m dealing with a rapist who’s uncle bails him out of everything,” Sam replied. “One day, and I am  **hoping** I am there to see it, you’re luck will run out and you’re uncle won’t be able to help you.”

_ Atta boy, Sammy. _ Dean beamed.

“Dean?” Sam asked.

“Yeah?”

“Get in the truck.”

_ Don’t have to tell me twice.  _ “Okay.”

Sam and Alastair glared at one another for a few more moments before Sam followed Dean to the truck. He slammed the truck door behind him.

Benny put his truck in drive and sped away from the mansion that Dean was happy to see disappear in the rearview mirror.

“Hey, Sam, I’m sorry. I know…”

Sam held up a hand to silence Dean. “I have a call to make.”

Dean watched Sam scroll through his contacts until he landed on a name.  _ Who the fuck is he calling? _

“Hey, Charlie.”

Silence.

“Yeah, I got him.”

Silence.

“I don’t know.”

More silence.

“We can talk later. I just wanted to let you know it was Ruby. Call Meg.”

Dean could hear screaming on the other side of the phone.

“Yes, I know you were right. Ruby's a bitch. Just call Meg, all right? All right. I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”

“So, I’m assuming Ruby is dead?”

Sam faced Dean and gave him a bitch face. “You have some explaining to do. Start talking.”

“Nothing happened!” Dean blurted.

Sam cocked an eyebrow. “I highly doubt it with a response like that.”

“I didn’t do anything!” Dean whined.

“Dean! Stop bullshitting me!” Sam chided. “Just tell the fucking truth!”

“I didn’t use. You can fucking test me!”

“Not using don’t mean not doing anything, brotha,” Benny explained. He hit his turn signal to exit the neighborhood.

Dean bowed his head. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Benny shook his head. “Dumbass.”

Sam smacked Dean on the back of his head.

“Ouch! What the fuck, Sam?” Dean asked.

“You’re a fucking idiot!”

“Thanks for the news flash. I’m already thoroughly aware of that,” Dean grumbled.

Sam huffed out a breath and shook his head. “No, Dean, I mean you are a serious fucking dumbass,” Sam argued.

“I’m really not disagreeing here, Sam. Care to explain why you feel the need to reiterate how much of a dumbass I am?”

Sam rolled his eyes and shot Dean bitch face number eight. “You seriously need to ask me why you’re a dumbass?”

It was Dean’s turn to make a bitch face. “No, Sam. You don’t have to explain to me why I’m a dumbass. I know why. I knew I fucked up the moment I showed up at her door.”

“Then why the  **hell** did you stay!?” Sam barked.

“I don’t know. I felt like if I’m gonna fuck up might as well do it right.”

Benny snorted. “So, fucking her is worse than using heroin?”

_ Shit… _

“I’ll take your silence as a yes,” Benny replied. “So, what you’re telling us is you felt that way and still decided to jump into bed with her?”

_ Maybe… _

“You’re a fucking idiot,” Sam announced, yet again.

“I’m pretty sure we’ve already solidified that fact around ten times now,” Dean groaned.

Sam threw his hands up. “What the fuck are you going to tell Cas? Did you think of that?”

Dean frowned at his knotted fingers. “I don’t know. I honestly thought that he wanted nothing to do with me until about an hour ago.”

Sam scoffed. “You’re an idiot.”

“Sam,” Dean warned.

Sam screwed up his face. “Don’t ‘Sam,’ me! Someone saying they need time does not instantly mean they’re done. He’s in the hospital, you dumbass!  **Plus** , the fucking icing on this goddamn cake, all you had to do was wait  **twenty minutes** , and he would have called you to tell you that himself!”

Dean took a deep breath. “Thanks, Sam… Not feeling shitty enough right now for all of this.”

“You should feel shitty!” Sam berated. “Not only did you once buy drugs from his rapist, but you have also now fucked his rapist’s cousin because you were all butthurt that he wouldn’t talk to you.”

“I know! I fucked up, okay!?” Dean yelled.

“So, how do you plan on fixing this, brotha?” Benny questioned.

“I’m going to be honest with him,” Dean admitted.

Sam was cackling before Dean finished. “That’s a fucking joke! You? Honest?”

“Yes, me!” Dean snapped. “Did it ever occur to you that I actually fucking care about him? That I want things to work out with him? I may not be into chick flick moments, but I’ll do it for him!”

“What if he wants nothing to do with you now after you tell him?” Benny asked.

Dean started to shake his head vigorously. “No. I don’t want to even think about that.”

“It’s a serious possibility, brotha.”

“Well, at least I will have tried, right?” Dean questioned as he worried his lip.

Sam shot Dean a stink face. “You’re gonna be a pain in my ass for the rest of my life if this doesn’t work out, aren’t you?”

_ No… maybe… probably… _

Sam made an exaggerated sigh. “Ugh, I’ll talk to Charlie. She’s gonna hate you. More so than she already does, but...”

Dean bowed his head. “Don’t even bother,” he mumbled.

“I am not dealing with your moping around for another week. I’m just not going to do it., especially if I can expect you being a pain in my ass for the rest of my life,” Sam groaned.

“I’m not gonna…”

Sam’s bitchface halted his response.

“Seriously, Sammy, don’t even bother,” Dean continued. “I’ll tell him the truth and if he hates me…” he took a deep breath. “I’ll try to find a way to live with it.”

“We both know you suck at accepting shit, Dean,” Benny added.

“I won’t have a choice, will I?” Dean asked. “I’m not going to force him to forgive me. I’m not going to force him to want me the way I want him,” he muttered.

Sam raised an eyebrow at Dean before he rolled his eyes. “Ugh, fine. Don’t say that I didn’t try to help.”

The three of them sat in silence for the rest of the trip back to Dean and Sam’s house.


	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven

“Are you here to spend time with me? Or do you plan on checking your phone every five minutes?”

Charlie didn’t think she was that obvious. “I’m not looking at my phone every five minutes.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “I was being nice. In reality, you’ve been looking at it every two minutes since you got here!”

“I’m waiting for someone to call,” Charlie admitted.

He arched an eyebrow. “Jo?”

“No…”

“Who?”

“No one…”

Castiel huffed out a deep breath. “Charlie? Who?”

“I spoke to Sam earlier. He said he was going to give me a callback. It’s been over an hour,” she said as she looked at her cell phone again.

“Well, I’m sure he’ll call you,” Castiel said with a shrug. “What is he calling you about?”

“Stuff…”

He furrowed his eyebrows. “What sort of stuff?”

“You know, things…”

Castiel threw his hands up. “Charlie!”

“I don’t want to say,” she groaned.

“Why not?”

Charlie looked down at her knotted fingers as she worried her lip. “Well, it’s because I don’t want to upset you while you’re in here.”

“So, it’s about Dean?” he questioned as he raised both of his eyebrows.

“Among other things…”

“Other things?”

Charlie let out a deep breath through her nostrils. “We know who told Alastair about the party.”

Castiel shook his head and blinked a couple of times. “Really? Who?”

“Ruby,” Charlie growled.

“Huh.” Castiel shrugged. “Not even close to surprised.”

“Meg was above and beyond shocked. To be honest, after the initial reveal, I wasn’t all that surprised either,” she added with a shrug.

“I don’t understand why Meg was still friends with her, to begin with. She stole a bunch of her shit. Remember when Meg found her father’s goblet in Ruby’s closet while they were doing a project? She was grounded for… What was it? Two months, before she found it at Ruby’s house?”

“Three months,” Charlie corrected.

“Plus, remember when she ruined my mom’s book club? That is one of the only times my mom lost it on me. Which, of course, she apologized for later because I didn’t know Ruby was planning on sticking pins in the couch.”

“Oh my God! I remember that! My mom was pissed about that, too. Jo’s mom was ready to kill Ruby!” Charlie exclaimed.

“Not to mention all of the guys she’s fucked and the rumors she started…” Castiel shook his head. “What a bitch.”

“Still, at least Meg is probably going to kill her now. Or worse comes to worse; we never have to talk to that bitch or see her ever again,” Charlie gushed with a devious grin. She shook her head. “I seriously would never want to be on Meg’s bad side.”

“Neither would I. But she loves us, so we’re lucky,” Castiel beamed.

Charlie laughed. “Depends on the day, Castiel.” Her phone started to ring. It was Sam. “I gotta take this call.”

“Go,” he ordered with a smile.

Charlie went into the bathroom. She was happy there was a fan that turned on as soon as she turned on the light. Unfortunately, the fact that Castiel needed a hand to go to the bathroom was also a positive in this situation. She had a feeling whatever Sam had to tell her would not be good news. “Hey, Sam. What happened?”

“Ugh,” Sam sighed. “He fucked up, Charlie.”

Charlie pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes. “What did he do?”

“I think it’s best if we both stay out of this one, Cha…”

Charlie cut him off. “Nuh - uh, Winchester. You are going to tell me right now what he did! I am not letting my best friend get any more hurt than he already is!” she hissed trying to control her volume.

“Charlie,” he sighed. “He really wants to be the one to tell him.”

“I don’t care what he wants! I need to prepare my friend for whatever stupid shit your brother has done!” she growled. “You’re brother is causing him a lot of heartaches. If whatever he did when he disappeared is going to cause more of it, Castiel needs to be prepared!”

Sam let out a deep breath. “He saw his ex…”

“Okay? And?” she asked while waving her hand in a motion for Sam to elaborate, even though he couldn’t see her.

“He slept with her.”

She pinched the bridge of her nose in exasperation again and huffed out a deep breath. “Is that all?”

“No.”

“Okay? What else?”

“His ex, Lily… well, she… Ugh, Charlie please can I not be the person to tel…”

“Sam!” she barked.

“His ex is Alastair’s cousin…”

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel could hear nothing but the sound of the air vent in the bathroom when Charlie entered. He sat there, twiddling his thumbs, waiting for her to come out of the bathroom. Everyone, including Dean, was being incredibly cryptic about where he had been. Someone vanishing for an entire night and part of the day usually doesn't mean rainbows and kittens are on their way. It usually means foul news and a lot of it.

The news of Ruby’s involvement with Alastair at the party was far from surprising. If anything, Castiel felt like he should have known. Jo told him she left Sam high and dry at the party. That should have been his first clue. He could only imagine what Meg planned on doing to her. He only hoped that this time she would rip her to shreds rather than just threatening to do so. Castiel didn’t want to tempt the fates by wishing Ruby would be brutally maimed by his friend , but he was in the hospital because of her after all. So, he figured the scales needed a bit of balancing already.

Castiel turned to his left when he heard Charlie raise her voice slightly.  _ That can’t be good… _

He couldn’t help but try to predict what Dean did.  _Maybe he found Alastair and beat the shit out of him… Maybe he got drunk and was picked up by the cops for indecent exposure._ Castiel sh ook his head.  _ No. Dean wouldn’t do that. Talk about pissing his future away. Maybe he went upstate to the Catskills to get away from everything. Maybe…. _

“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?! SHE’S HIS COUSIN?!?!?!?!?!”

Castiel’s head whipped to his left where Charlie was screaming in the bathroom.  _ What? Who’s cousin? _

“DON’T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN, SAM!”

Billie popped her head into the room. “Is everything all right in here, Castiel?”

Castiel shrugged. “Damned if I know. Charlie’s on the phone in the bathroom talking to our friend Sam. Apparently, someone is someone else’s cousin, and she’s pissed about it. I don’t know,” he explained, terribly, as he shook his head, then shrugged again.

Billie knocked on the bathroom door.

Charlie exited. Her face was red as she took a few deep breaths. “Yeah!” she snapped.

“Watch your tone! Stop hollering and cussing. You’re upsetting other patients,” Billie retorted. “Plus, you shouldn’t be on your phone. There are rules. You’re not respecting them. Say goodbye to Sam and hang up the phone.”

“This conversation isn’t over, Samuel,” Charlie snarled into the phone. She paused for a reply. “Okay, good. Bye.” She hung up the phone and glared at Billie. “Satisfied?”

Billie crossed her arms, raised an eyebrow, and pursed her lips as she leaned on one of her hips. “Thrilled. Now keep it down,” she ordered, then strutted out of the room.

“I’m assuming the conversation didn’t go well,” Castiel said with an expectant smile.

Charlie’s head snapped towards Castiel. Her mouth had formed a thin line. “Obviously.”

“Care to explain what happened? From what I heard, some girl is someone’s cousin, and Sam wanted you to calm down. Who is said girl’s cousin? You don’t have to explain why Sam wanted you to calm down.”

“Castiel, I want to tell you. Trust me, I do. However, this…” Her face screwed up as if she had just smelled something awful. “I don’t have the heart or stomach to tell you what I just found out. All I can tell you is I wouldn’t touch Dean with a ten-foot pole, even if I were straight.”

Castiel’s face sobered.  _ He… no… _ All of the air in his lungs left him, and he felt tears begin to pool in his eyes. “He slept with someone… didn’t he?”

Charlie shook her head. “Ugh, I really need to watch my big fucking mouth,” she sighed and took a seat at the edge of Castiel’s hospital bed. “Yes, he did.”

Castiel’s hands knotted together. He coughed to hide the tears he was holding back. “Who was it?”

“Castiel… I-I can’t.”

Castiel looked at Charlie’s pained expression. He didn’t want to push, but it was too late now. “Who was it, Charlie?”

“Castiel…”

“WHO WAS IT?”

“His ex…” she whispered.

_ Give me more than that. You wouldn’t be disgusted if that were all the person was.  _ “Who was it, Charlie?”

“Lily.”

“Who is Lily?”

“Dean’s ex.”

“I gathered that much. Whose cousin is she? You screamed she’s his…” That’s when it hit him.  _ Oh, my God… I’m going to be sick.  _ “No…”

“Castiel, deep breaths. Please! You’re gonna hyperventilate.” Charlie stood up and rushed to stand right next to Castiel. She exaggerated taking deep breaths in an attempt to get Castiel to calm down.

“Garbage pail.”

“What?”

Castiel felt his lunch in his throat. It was about fifteen seconds away from making a reappearance. “Pail!”

Charlie got the jist after taking a good look at his face. She searched the room for something to give him until her eyes landed on the small ice bucket with a tiny bag in it. She removed the lid and shoved it in his face.

Castiel tried his hardest to vomit without retching too much. He didn’t want to pull his stitches and prolong his stay in the hospital.  _ I want to die right now. That would be easier, right? Probably not… _

Charlie was rubbing soothing circles into Castiel's back as he continued to throw up the contents of his day's meals. “I’m sorry, Castiel,” she apologized as she grabbed a couple of tissues from the box next to his bed.

He grabbed the tissues when he felt like he was done and wiped his mouth. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes.  _ This entire thing with Dean just keeps getting worse and worse!  _ “Ugh,” he coughed, trying his best not to gag. “Water, please.”

Charlie grabbed the vomit bucket from his hand and returned with a plastic cup of water. “Should I call the nurse?”

Castiel opened his eyes and took a sip of water. “No. I don’t think I pulled anything.”

She nodded her head. “I truly am sorry, Castiel.”

“What should I do?” he asked as he turned his face towards her.

“That’s up to you.”

“Hospital bed or not, I really need to talk to him. I can’t prolong this anymore. I can’t… I don’t think I can just get over this one, Charlie. Knowing Alastair… I could perhaps understand that after he explains everything to me. But this?!” he shook his head. “He went and slept with that asshole’s cousin because I wouldn’t talk to him? What else could he do in the future if something comes up? I know we’re not together. I know that nothing was ever said about us being exclusive or official or whatever. Still, is this indicative of what I would have to look forward to if I even try to have a relationship with him? He jumped to a serious conclusion and… I can’t even say it, or I’m going to vomit up bile.”

“The choice is yours. I can’t decide for you.”

“I can’t wait until Sunday. I know that much.”

Charlie shrugged. “Then, call him. Or text him. I think texting would be better in this situation, personally.”

Castiel nodded his head. “Okay. What should I say?”

 

>>>>>>

 

After being read the riot act by everyone, Dean escaped to his room. He closed the door and leaned up against it. Letting his head fall back as his eyes closed.  _ NEVER FUCK UP AGAIN!!!! _ He clicked the lock after a minute of just leaning up against the door and walked over to where his phone was plugged in. The green notification light was blinking.

He unlocked his screen and saw that the text was from Cas. His face lit up.

**Cas: What are you doing tomorrow after school?**

**Dean: Nothing really. I was planning on coming home and doing homework. Why?**

It took longer than usual for him to receive a response.

**Cas: I know you said you wanted to wait until Sunday, but I want to see you. I’m ready to talk. Would you come here after school?**

_ What? Didn’t we just agree earlier to wait until Sunday? He needs to rest. _

**Dean: Are you sure, Cas? You need your rest. All of this can wait until Sunday.**

Dean watched the three dots on the bottom of his screen dance and disappear for about five minutes before he received the next message.

**Cas: I’d rather talk about everything sooner rather than later. Would you mind coming here tomorrow? I’d really like to see you.**

Deep down, Dean knew something was off about the entire situation, but he wanted to see Cas. He couldn’t deny that.

**Dean: Of course, I wouldn’t mind. I miss you, Cas. Would four work for you? I gotta take Sammy home after school first.**

The response to the next message arrived a lot faster than the other ones.

**Cas: That’s fine. Not like I have anywhere else to be. Lol**

_ Smartass… _

**Dean: Haha. Funny.**

**Cas: See you tomorrow, Dean.**

**Dean: Later, Cas. ;)**

Even though his gut was telling him to prepare for the worst, Dean couldn’t help but feel excited about seeing Cas the next day. He didn’t know what he should expect when he walks into the hospital room. Still, nothing made him happier than knowing he was going to get to see Cas.

Everything he had to tell him was not going to be easy to share. He knew better than everyone the information he was about to divulge about his past was not easy for anyone to digest. He could only imagine how Cas was going to feel about everything. Lily and Alastair were now honestly part of his past. The last twenty-four hours definitely solidified that fact.

The thing Dean was the most worried about was telling Castiel about what he had done with Lily the day before.  _ Maybe the fact that you pictured him will… _ He cut that line of thought short.  _ Why would that matter to anyone? You still slept with someone when it was evident that you guys were heading towards something great. Towards something special… _

Dean put his head on his pillow, weaved his hands together, and placed them on his chest.  _ You’ll be lucky if he decides to ever talk to you again… _

The next day, Dean couldn’t help but feel like he was walking on air. No matter what kind of dirty looks he got from Alastair, nothing could touch him. He was going to see Cas after work; nothing could be better. The look Charlie was shooting in his direction, however, was worrisome. He asked Sam on the ride back to the house what that was all about, but he shrugged and said he had no knowledge as to why she would look at him like that.  _ My ass, you have no idea. _

The parking lot at the hospital wasn’t full. He could have easily found plenty of spots closer to the building, but he parked as far away from other cars as possible. He hated going to the mall, hospitals, bars; you name it because no one cared about the car next to it.  _ Every parking lot might as well be the Islandia Walmart parking lot. _ Once he felt comfortable with the spot he had chosen, he put the car in park and turned off the car.

His dashboard’s clock said that it was 3:37. He was way ahead of schedule. He couldn’t believe how happy that made him. There was no way he was even close to ready to go inside. His gut was telling him he was about to walk into a mess or at least he was about to cause one. No one hated Dean more than himself. At that moment, a more valid statement could never have been said.  _ You fucked up. It’s time to face the music. _

After taking a few deep breaths, Dean finally worked up the courage to get out of the car and walk up to the hospital. He dragged his feet the entire way.  _ You were jumping out of your seat all Goddamn day, so excited to finally get here, and now you’re freaking the fuck out. Pull it together! _

When he walked through the entrance, he was immediately stopped by security. He gave them Cas’ name and room number. They scanned his driver’s license, asked him to place his palm over some sort of machine, and took a picture. As soon as they gave him his sticker and told him which way to go, Dean was on the move. It didn’t take long for him to get to the Med/Surg floor and it took even less time to find Cas’ room. He looked at his cell phone.  _ 3:59… Shit, perfect timing. _ With one final deep breath, he walked through the door.

Cas was sitting straight up in his hospital bed talking to a nurse with short brown hair. Both of them heard him enter the room. The brunette nurse slowly turned to face him and gave him a small smile.

_ She’s gorgeous!  _ He internally smacked himself for that thought.  _ Focus, Winchester. Keep your dick in your pants! It’s gotten you nowhere good in the last forty-eight hours. _

The nurse whispered something to Cas before she stood up, then made her way towards Dean. She gave him a once-over. “So, you’re Dean?”

He shook his head quickly with surprise. “Um...Yeah.”

He spared a quick glance in Cas’ direction. The skin around his eye was tinged with a deep hue of yellow and a faint reminisce of purple where Alastair had hit him. Cas was picking at a nonexistent string on his lap, avoiding Dean’s gaze.

Dean turned his attention back to the nurse. “Has he been talking about me?”

The nurse's eyebrows raised as her eyes widened. “Yeah, just a little,” she replied. She spared one final look in Cas’ direction. “I’ll be back soon to check your vitals,” she promised with a grin.

“Thank you, Tessa,” Cas murmured

“Anytime,” Tessa answered.

Dean knew he had hearts in his eyes as soon as Cas’ eyes met his. He couldn’t help it. “Hey, Cas.”

Castiel bowed his head and glared down at his hands. “Hello, Dean.”

Dean furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.  _ This is already off on a horrible note. _ He sat down at the foot of Cas’ bed. “I’m sorry you have to be in here.”

Cas’ head tilted to the right as he raised his head and looked at the wall in front of him. “You didn’t put me in this bed,” Cas replied as his cerulean gaze finally met Dean’s.

Dean knew that Cas was just as lost in his eyes as Dean was in Cas’. He couldn’t help but flash a coy crooked smile in Cas’ direction.  _ God, I’ve missed him. _ “Doesn’t mean that I’m not somewhat responsible for why you're in it.”

Cas’ head remained in a tilted position as his eyes narrowed in bemusement. “How on earth are you responsible for me being in this bed?” he asked.

Dean’s shoulders slumped. “I saw you exit the house and when that guy grabbed your arm,” he admitted. “I didn’t get out of the car until I saw you walk away. Alastair was already stalking up behind you at that point. I should have gotten out of the car when I saw them approach you. I hesitated. I didn’t think…” He took a deep breath. “I’m so sorry, Cas. For everything,” he apologized as he bowed his head.

“It is not your responsibility to control others behavior. It is, however, your responsibility to control your own, Dean,” Cas snapped.

Dean turned his head slightly to get a good look at Cas. His jaw was clenched tightly shut, and his nostrils were flared.

_ Am I missing something?  _ “What?”

“Ugh,” Castiel sighed as he threw his head back against one of his pillows. “The reason why I wanted you to come here is that I already know what happened yesterday.”

_ Oh, shit… _ Dean’s heart dropped to the pit of his stomach. “Who told you?” he implored as he stood up.

Cas rolled his eyes in exasperation. “It doesn’t matter who told me.”

Dean crossed his arms over his chest.  _ “ I don’t know why she looked at you like that _ _ , _ _ Dean.” Liar…  _ “It was Sam, wasn’t it?”

Castiel narrowed his eyes at Dean. “Why does it matter?”

_ How much did he tell her… _ “It matters because…”

Cas cut him off. “Stop,” he ordered with a wave of his hand. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he locked eyes with Dean. “You slept with Alastair’s cousin, right?” His question was hesitantly asked. There was an excruciating amount of pain in his voice.

Dean winced.  _ Everything. That’s what he told her.  _ “Yes,” he croaked.

Castiel’s face screwed up into an expression of pure disgust. “Oh, my God. I’m going to be sick again,” He looked almost green with nausea.

“Again?”

Apparently, Castiel’s anger was going to win the battle over his nausea. “What the fuck is wrong with you? I said I needed time! You couldn’t wait?”

“Cas… can I explain?”

Cas cocked an eyebrow at Dean. “Is your explanation ‘I was possessed by a demon, and my actions were not my own’?” he asked with complete sincerity.

_ What?  _ “No.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Is this how it’s going to be if I even try to have a relationship with you? You get upset and go and sleep with your ex?”

“No. Of course not,” Dean scoffed.

“Then why the hell did you do it?!”

Dean stood up and started to pace in front of Cas’ bed. His head snapped towards Cas as he paused. Whatever filter he had because of his guilt, shut off. “You know what? Fuck you, Cas! You never let me explain or defend myself! You constantly shut me down and refuse to talk to me. This time, Cas, was bad. You’re in the fucking hospital! You wouldn’t talk to me. You didn’t even let me know that you were okay! I was left completely in the dark. I thought you were done with me, that you’d given up,” Dean ranted as he once again began to pace in front of Cas’ bed. “So, yeah, I made a stupid and rash decision. I’m not saying that what I did was okay. I  **hate** myself for everything that I’ve put you through. Still, you  **never** let me explain myself. You jump to conclusions just as often as I do.”

Castiel threw his hands up. “Well, then talk. You obviously have a lot on your mind. This, right now, is your chance, to be honest with me. Right now, Dean, I honestly don’t know if I want to be friends with you. Let alone even consider being in a relationship with you.”

Dean grabbed the front of the bed. His knuckles were turning white from the strength of his grip. He glared at Cas. “I planned on being horrifyingly honest with you,” he hissed. “Unfortunately, someone beat me to the punch and didn’t let me explain myself. Which inevitably has set you off, as per usual,” he snarled, then quickly released his grip.

Dean approached one of the chairs over by the window and harshly grabbed it. He carried it to the other side of the bed. He could feel Cas’ eyes following him as he circled him. The amount of tension filling the room was palpable. When Dean finally landed on the spot he felt was best for their “talk,” he slammed the chair on the floor causing Castiel to jump out of his skin.

“Now, are you ready to listen to me? Or do you plan on snapping at me some more?” Dean asked.

Castiel grimaced. “Well, as long as you’re honest with me and don’t dance around the issue, I...”

Dean rolled his eyes. “See already, hearing not listening! I said I plan on being horrifyingly honest!”

Castiel slapped his thighs with exasperation and looked out the window. When he once again faced Dean, a bitch face that would make Sam jealous covered his face. “Well, go on. Dazzle me with your honesty,” he taunted sarcastically. He was basically making spirit fingers when he said the word “dazzle.”

“Smart ass…” Dean leaned back in his chair with his arms crossed over his chest. “You’re gonna hate me more than you already do by the time I’m done, just FYI.”

“At least you’re going to be honest with someone. Probably going to be a first for you.”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Castiel. “Do you want to hear what fucking happened or are you going to make sassy comments?”

Castiel held his hands up. “Go ahead. Continue.”

Dean shook his head.  _ Here goes nothing… _ “My band,  Raised from Perdition , we were getting pretty famous this past winter. We were booking gigs everywhere. Venues throughout the island, the five boroughs, and even some in Connecticut and Jersey. We even had a label looking into picking us up . ” Dean adjusted his position. He leaned forward, put his elbows on his knees, and ran his hands through his hair before he sat up again. His hands paused on the back of his neck. “With fame and recognition comes a lot of other shit. Lily was part of that other shit. She showed up at a lot of our shows . S he was a serious groupie. After seeing her a few times, I decided to introduce myself.”

Dean took a deep breath and let it out. “Now, Cas, I’m not gonna lie. I’ve already said that a few times, but it’s true. You’re not going to like a fuck ton of the shit I’m gonna say, but I’m gonna say it anyway. So, no matter how much it pisses you off or disgusts you, I need you to let me say it. Okay?”

Castiel crossed his arms over his chest and leaned as far back as his bed allowed him. He held his hand in front of him in a gesture that clearly meant “ **continue** .”

“Okay…” Dean peered off to the side.  _ Where the fuck was I? _ When his brain was back on track, he locked eyes with Castiel. “All right, so when I introduced myself to her, I could tell she was some form of trouble , but I ignored my instincts. I was thinking with my dick. I saw a blonde wearing a low cut white dress with an hourglass figure, and the blood that usually runs to my brain went south.”

Castiel’s face screwed up.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Again, brutally and disgustingly honest. So, do you want me to continue or are we ending it here?”

Castiel took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “Continue,” he sighed.

“Okay.” He shifted in his seat before he decided to speak again. “That night,” he swallowed, “I fucked her. She was incredible. I had never been with someone so passionate. She was an animal in the sack. She blew my mind in more ways than one. I was addicted to her by Monday morning.”

Castiel’s eyes widened.

“Yeah… um… it was kind of a long weekend…” he coughed.  _ Get on with the story, Dean. _ He cleared his throat again. “Anyway... we started to hang out. Most of the time it was just fucking. I’d show up to her mansion in St. James. She’d drag me into the house, and we’d spend another weekend wrapped up in each other. After about a month, we decided to take our relationship outside of the bedroom and went to a few parties together. No raves or anything. Just the usual shit. Drinking, passing a joint around, nothing insane. Eventually, that wasn’t enough for her. I didn’t know it when I first met her, but she is into some hardcore shit. That is how I met her cousin, Alastair.”

Castiel ground his teeth.

“I know…” Dean bowed his head. “Please, just let me finish.”

“Go on.”

“Unfortunately, Cas, we got along at first. He was creepy as fuck, but it was a creepy I could deal with in a way. Every time he crossed a line, I would shut him down, he’d laugh it off, and shit would go back to normal.” He shook his head. “But that’s beside the point. He was and still is her dealer. The first time we met, he was bringing her some Molly. It was beyond anything I had ever experienced up to that point. You’re basically experiencing sensory overload when you do Molly. Everything, touch, and taste are intensified by a million. Lily and I spent the night either fucking or just touching each other. I figured if this guy could give me shit that made me feel like that, I might as well try whatever else he has to offer. That’s when I was introduced to Lily’s drug of choice. Heroin.”

Up to that point, Castiel had been glaring at his lap. His eyes shot up to Dean’s.

“Yeah, I know. How stupid could I get? The answer is pretty fucking stupid,” he admitted.  _ Understatement, Winchester… _ Dean didn’t truly want to admit what he was planning on saying next. When he suddenly appeared after four months, back in August, he told everyone only what they needed to know. He didn’t tell them what it felt like. The power and unbelievable calm he felt when the drug was pumping through his veins. No one knew how he ended up chasing the white rabbit around. They knew that Lily introduced him to that world, but they didn’t know just how far down the rabbit hole he had fallen. Even if they did, he only told them half the truth.  _ You promised honesty… _ He took a deep, steadying breath. “Cas… No one really knows any of what I’m about to tell you. No one except Lily and Alastair that is. I promised you honesty. Just…” he sighed. “Promise me you won’t tell anyone. No matter what you decide after today, please keep what I’m about to tell you to yourself.”

Cas searched Dean’s face. At first, his scrutinizing gaze was firm, unyielding. Dean watched it soften , a lmost as if Cas was discovering a depth to Dean’s words that he wasn’t originally expecting. He nodded his head. “I promise, Dean. Nothing will leave this room.”

Dean released a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Thank you.”

Cas gave him a small nod. “Continue.”

“At the beginning, I was only using. Dear fuck, was I using. I was always searching for my next hit. I started skipping school. I bailed early during band practice. Fuck, I even fucked my band over when it came to that record deal. I would have done just about anything for it. In the end… I did,” he added as he shook his head. “Cas, I’ve disappeared before. That’s why Sam was freaking out yesterday. Last time it was for four months. I told them I was just drugged up with Lily or Al… I was drugged up, but… fuck!” he exclaimed as he stood up and harshly pushed the chair away. He ran his hands through his hair.  _ I can’t do this… I can’t tell him all of this… I can’t tell him everything that I’ve done! _ His hands started to shake. He laced his fingers behind his neck and shook his head.  

Suddenly, Dean felt a gentle touch on his bicep, calming the racing beat of his heart. He looked down and saw Cas was trying to soothe him. Dean dropped both of his hands from the back of his neck and covered Cas’ hand with one of his own.

“It’s okay, Dean,” Cas began. “I won’t hate you.”

Dean scoffed as he sat back down, never releasing the hand Cas had offered him. “I highly doubt that.”

“Are you still doing what you did?”

Dean regarded Cas with a dejected expression. “Of course, not.”

Cas did his signature head tilt. “Then, why would I hate you?”

Dean glanced down at their linked hands and noticed that Cas had still not taken his hand back. A sorrowful smile spread across his face as he laced his fingers with Cas’. “Cause… I hate me for what I did.”

“Has hating yourself helped you get over what you’ve done?” Cas added with a squeeze of Dean’s hand, forcing Dean to look at him. There was no judgment in Cas’ eyes, only concern. “You carry a lot, Dean. You never share what is truly bothering you. I’m not going to hate you for your past. You told me you were going to be horrifyingly honest with me. So far, you have held true to that promise,” he explained. “I’m still listening if you want to share, but I’m not going to force you.”

Dean started to rub his thumb across the length of Cas’. He took another deep breath. “I was basically Alastair’s henchman. I went where he told me to go. I was his bodyguard and soldier. I met all of his connects. I even dealt a few times. Everything I did was to get another hit of my new poison of choice,” he confessed. He coughed to cover an oncoming sob. “I put someone in the hospital, Cas. I beat him within an inch of his life because Al told me that this guy stole from him. I don’t even remember the guy's name. I just…” he paused. He could feel a traitorous tear streaming down his face. “Hurting people, that was only part of it,” he coughed again as he tried to conceal his emotions. “I stole things… Not only from strangers but family. I royally fucked up over and over again. I wish I could forget everything that I did, Cas, but there’s just too much.”

Cas placed his free hand over the ones that were tightly linked together.

He smiled softly up at Cas. “The reason why I left, after everything I did, was because… Bobby got hurt. I hadn’t answered my phone for months. I just threw it to the side. Al gave me a burner. That’s what I had been using. I randomly checked my messages one day and saw that Sammy left me a few texts telling me that Bobby was in the hospital, something happened at the shop. I freaked out. Bobby may not be my blood, but he’s the closest thing that I’ve ever had to a real dad.”

Cas’ eyebrows furrowed. “Your dad was alive up until you were fifteen, wasn’t he?”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Cas. “Yeah… How did you know…”

“I kinda...” he looked down at their hands. “I kinda know a bit about your life prior to Long Island because of Sam.”

Dean sat up straight and cocked an eyebrow at Cas. “Really? What did he tell you?”

“At the time, he didn’t know that I knew you… We were talking about some random stuff the first day that we had shop together. You came up,” he said with a shrug.

Dean chuckled softly. “I did, huh?”

Cas smiled and shook his head. “From the moment I met you, Dean, you have always come up in one way or another. I’ve been kind of lost since you grabbed those keys out of my hand in front of the auditorium.”

“You and me both, Cas,” Dean divulged. When Dean locked eyes with Cas, they were sparkling.  _ God, I will never get over how gorgeous this guy is. _

Cas coughed and looked back down at their hands. “Sorry. I rudely interrupted you. Please, continue.”

“It’s okay,” he smiled. “Well, my real dad, was a dick. I don’t know how much Sammy told you, but he was hardly ever there. He would disappear for weeks on end. When he did come back, he was usually drunk. We were broke as fuck because he pissed our money away by either gambling or drinking himself into a temporary coma. I spent most of my formative youth starving so Sammy wouldn’t have to. I used to lock Sam in one of the hundred crummy motel closets and hand him a pair of headphones when, John, would come back to the motel in a particularly foul mood. He never laid a hand on Sam because of it.”

Cas eyes widened with shock. “Sam didn’t tell me.”

“It’s not something people usually share, Cas.”

“He used to beat you?”

“The worst, and last time was on my fifteenth birthday. He… well, he…” Dean begrudgingly released their laced hands, stood up, and shrugged off his jacket. He took off the grey sweater he had been wearing exposing his white wife beater.

Castiel blushed with a coy smile. “Stripping for me, Dean? I don’t think I’m ready for that right now.”

Dean bellowed a hearty laugh. “Oh, you wish, Shurley.”

Castiel bashfully stared at his lap.

“I’m not stripping, Cas. I can’t explain what he did. I can only show you.”

When Cas looked back, his eyebrows had knitted together in a perplexed expression. “What do you mean?”

“There is a major reason why we ended up moving in with Bobby. My dad used to beat me, yes. However, the final time put me in the hospital. Sammy called Bobby freaking out because I never unlocked the closet door and he tried banging on it after a couple of hours, but I never answered.”

A raging fire started to burn brightly in Cas’ eyes. “What did he do, Dean?”

Dean sat down on Cas’ bed and showed him the scars that still marred his the otherwise perfect skin of his entire back.

Cas hand reached out and gently grazed over the  scar tissue on his shoulders. “Oh, my God, Dean! What did he do?”

“He came back drunk, nothing new. This time when he took off his belt, he hit me with the buckle. He continued to hit me until I passed out from the pain.”

“Oh, Dean,” Cas sobbed. “How could your father do this to you?”

Dean started to feel uncomfortable. No one but Sam and Bobby knew about where those scars had come from.  _ Well, again, you promised honesty… _ “Like I said. Bobby is my dad. John, my biological father, is nothing but a sperm donor to me.”

“I’m so sorry, Dean.”

“That was over five years ago, Cas.”

“That doesn’t make it okay, Dean. What happened to you, that level of abuse, will never be okay,” Cas admonished.

“I never said it was okay, Cas. I said that it happened over five years ago. I’ve had time to heal.”

“Your external scars have healed. Your internal, from what I can tell, are still open sores.”

Dean’s jaw dropped.  _ How… what?  _ “I’m fine.”

“Bullshit, you’re fine.”

“I am!”

“Dean, you’ve been honest with me so far today. Don’t lie to me now.”

“What do you want me to say, Cas? That he blamed me for my mother’s death? That he beat me because he couldn’t accept that the love of his life was gone? Nothing is going to change what he did to me. Nothing,” he hissed. “I’m no better, Cas. I’ve disappeared on people I care about as well for my own selfish fucking reasons. I’ve hurt people I care about because I couldn’t pull my shit together. You should know better than anyone! This past week, I let my past come back to haunt me and fucked a dumb bitch, that I want absolutely nothing to do with because I’m as weak as he was.”

Cas slapped the bed in frustration. “You’re not him, Dean. I’m not going to say that you haven’t fucked up. You have. Still, everyone makes mistakes. It’s what makes us human. Do you regret the things you’ve done?”

“Every fucking second.”

“Do you think your father ever regretted the things that he did? Do you think Alastair cares about the things you did for him? The things he did to me?”

“No…” Dean replied as he bowed his head.

“You’re not a monster, Dean. Stop making yourself into one.”

“Cas… I a…”

“Shut up! I don’t want to hear it! You’re not a monster. You’re not your father, and you are most certainly not Alastair. No matter what you say to me, you will never convince me that you are like them. You carry too much guilt over everything that has happened. Things you have no control over. Things you haven’t done. A monster doesn’t show remorse. They just do whatever makes them feel powerful.”

“Cas, I..”

“So help me, Dean, if you say one more negative comment about yourself, I will kick you out of this room. Stop it!”

Dean's eyebrows hit the ceiling with shock.  _ Shit… _

Cas narrowed his eyes at Dean. “Sit down, Dean,” he ordered with a growl.

Dean sat down on the chair without a second thought.  _ Fuck, that’s hot as hell… What does that say about me that I like when he’s bossy. _

Cas huffed out a deep breath. “Dean, you’ve given me an overload of information to sift through. I don’t have an answer for you right now. I need time to think. I need you to understand that me needing time does not mean that I have given up completely on you. However, no matter how honest you’ve been with me today, you still… You slept with someone else the last time I said I needed time. I don’t know whether or not I can trust you when it comes to sleeping with someone else.”

“I won’t, Cas. I pro…”

Cas held up a hand to silence him. “Look… I know that we’ve never truly… That this,” he motioned between the two of them, “never truly started. I have no right to claim you as mine. Still, when I first met you, everyone, including your brother, told me that you couldn’t keep it in your pants. I trusted you. You broke that trust.”

Dean bowed his head.  _ Everyone basically told him I’m a slut.  _ He shook his head.  _ Not like they were wrong… all things considered. _ “I used to sleep around. Besides this one obscenely stupid mistake, I haven’t even thought of anything or anyone else but you since the moment I met you.”

“The mistake still happened. It’s gonna take time for me to trust you, Dean. We didn’t even begin to explore what this could be and you… Well, you know what you did,” he mumbled. “Give me time, Dean. I promise I’m not going to keep you in the dark this time.”

Dean glowered at the floor.

“What I said yesterday morning,” Cas began, “is still true.”

Dean glanced up at Cas and saw that he had downcasted his eyes morosely towards his knotted fingers.

Their eyes met. They spent a few moments just looking at one another before Cas spoke. “I miss you, Dean. God help me, I can’t stop thinking about you. I want you. More than I have ever wanted anything in my entire life,” he confessed. “When you kiss me...” He sighed as he shook his head at the ceiling. “Fuck... I know you feel it , too. It’s electrifying. I want that,” he admitted as he once again met Dean’s eyes. “I need that,” he insisted as his voice grew impressively deeper.

Dean felt his dick take a sudden interest in the conversation and timbre of Cas’ voice. Dean bowed his head to glare at his dick.  _ So fucking inappropriate right now, dude.  _ He only hoped that Cas didn’t notice. When he looked back at Cas, he knew he hadn’t.

“Still, my lack of trust in you…” He shook his head. “It’s outweighing that need right now.”

Dean nodded his head. “I can give you time, Cas. All of the time you need. I won’t break your trust again. I promise.”

“Well, just like respect, in this situation trust is earned, not just given.”

They sat in silence for a minute or two until they heard someone clearing their throat behind them. It was the nurse, Tessa. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything, but it’s time for me to take Castiel’s vitals.”

Dean stood up and rushed to put his sweatshirt back on. “It’s okay. I should probably go.”

Cas nodded in agreement. “I will text you later.”

Dean gave Cas a crooked smile as he grabbed his coat. “Okay. See ya, Cas.”

“Goodbye, Dean.”

They shared one lingering stare before Tessa once again cleared her throat.

“Sorry,” Dean apologized. “I’ll go. Bye, Cas.”

“Goodnight, Dean.”

“Later, Tessa,” Dean said with a wink.  _ Stop doing shit like that! _

Tessa shook her head. “So long, Dean.”

Dean exited the hospital and made his way out to his Impala. Luckily, there were no scratches or dents. He sat down in the driver’s seat and put his head on the steering wheel as he held it.  _ Well, that went better than I expected. I can probably kiss any sort of physical relationship with him goodbye… _ Dean stuck the key in the ignition. Bad Company’s “Ready for Love” filled the car.  _ Does the radio just know how to fuck with me or something? _ He exited the parking lot and headed home, hoping that maybe, just maybe, Cas will take a chance on him.


	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight

No matter how hard Castiel tried, sleep didn’t come. He spent hours staring at the ceiling, lost in thought. Dean had gifted him with an abundance of knowledge. More than he could handle. The last thing he was expecting when Dean walked into the room that day was that Dean was a junkie and a dealer. Not to mention he was probably wanted for assault and larceny. God only knows what else he could have possibly done for Alastair during those four months that he fell off the face of the earth.

Castiel wasn’t lying when he told Dean he didn’t hate him. However, knowing what he knows now, apparently, cheating would be the least of his worries if they were to become involved. Dean could say he wasn’t going to get involved with any of the horrible things he once did, but could he really trust him? What would happen if they had another fight in the future? Would Dean suddenly decide he could no longer avoid the pull of heroin and fall into the same bad habits? Would he have to worry that Dean would steal from him? From his family?

Castiel couldn’t imagine a life without Dean. Just thinking about casting him aside caused an inconceivable amount of pain. The pain in his chest was close to unbearable. Almost as if he could no longer breath and his heart was no longer beating. Still, he knew he couldn’t trust him with his heart. At least not for right now.  _ Yeah… Uh _ _ - _ _ huh… Cause he doesn’t already have that… _

After tossing and turning for a few hours, Castiel finally made a decision. He couldn't force Dean out of his life. Too much of Castiel’s heart and mind were occupied by Dean. Much to his chagrin, he could never push Dean away. Instead, as he told Dean earlier, he would at least let Dean try to earn his trust.  _ We can be friends, right? _

Unfortunately, he had to admit; friendship would probably be impossible. He craved Dean like a pregnant woman wants pickle and peanut butter sandwiches.  Wanting Dean was wrong on so many different levels, especially after what he had done, but he needed him. Dean made him feel whole. Thus, regardless of indigestion, the entire ordeal was causing him, he was about to take a severe leap of faith and give Dean a shot.

As the sun began to rise, Castiel grabbed his phone.  _ 7:40… I wonder if he’s even up. It’s the weekend. I know my ass wouldn’t be up for another half hour if I had work. Another three if I had the day off. _ He stared at his phone for another five minutes before he eventually said screw it and messaged him anyway.  _ If he’s sleeping, he’ll message me when he wakes up. _

**Castiel: Hello, Dean.**

Much to his surprise, he saw the three dots immediately start to bounce in the bottom left of his screen.

_ Was he waiting to hear from me or something? _

**Dean: Hey, Cas. Good morning! You’re up early :)**

**Castiel: I never went to sleep.**

**Dean: I’m sorry… That’s my fault, isn’t it?**

**Castiel: Mostly mine, but we can share the blame if you’d like. Lol**

**Dean: Haha, I’m good with that.**

Castiel chuckled.  _ Weirdo… _

**Castiel: So… How do you feel about trying to be friends?**

The three dots bounced for about two minutes then went away. It was another five before they returned.

_ I should have known he wouldn’t be okay with that… _

**Dean: I’d gladly be your friend, Cas. I’ll take what I can get. :D**

_ Shit! Really? _

**Castiel: Okay :) I’m going home tomorrow.**

**Castiel: Charlie is planning a small welcome home party for me.**

**Castiel: She thinks it’s supposed to be a surprise, but she is horrible at keeping secrets. Lol**

**Castiel: Charlie said she has already provided Sam with the details.**

**Castiel: Would you want to join us?**

Dean replied to the question Castiel hadn’t even asked as he hit send.

**Dean: Don’t even have to ask. I’ll be there.**

Castiel snickered.  _ Yeah… friends… definitely going to work. _

**Castiel: Okay :D I’ll see you tomorrow, then.**

**Dean: Can’t wait. See you soon, Cas!**

**Castiel: Yes. I will see you tomorrow, Dean :)**

**> >>>>>**

 

“YES!” Dean crowed.

Bobby ran into the office from the shop. “What the hell are you hollering about, ya idjit?! Scared the shit out of everyone.”

Dean was grinning like a fool. “I’m just excited.”

“I’m assuming this is about Castiel. Am I right?” Bobby asked as he crossed his arms over his chest.

Dean shrugged with a smirk. “Maybe…”

“Well, aren’t you adorable,” he jested with a knowing smile.

“Shut up!” Dean tried and failed to sound angered by Bobby’s teasing.

Bobby shook his head with a grin. “Get back to work, boy.”

“I’m gettin’ right on that.”

Bobby continued to shake his head as he exited the room. He mumbled something indiscernible.

_ I want to surprise him with something. What does he like besides music and books? I could always bring food! _

He texted Sam.

**Dean: Cas mentioned a party tomorrow. I wanna bring something, any suggestions?**

About two hours later he received his response.

**Sam: So… He’s decided to give you another chance? Wow!**

**Dean: No, we’re just friends.**

**Sam: Pfft, yeah. We’ll see how long that lasts.**

Dean swore he could hear the bitch face.

**Dean: We can be just friends, Sam. He’s a great guy. You’re friends with him.**

**Sam: Yeah, but I’ve never wanted to get into his pants.**

**Dean: Wow, Sam… You’re a douche.**

**Sam: You know I’m right.**

_ Of course, I know you’re right... _

**Dean: Anyway, what should I bring?**

**Sam: Idk.**

**Dean: Wow! You’re a load of help.**

**Sam: Why don’t you ask Jo?**

**Dean: You could always just give me Charlie’s number…**

**Sam: Not gonna happen.**

**Sam: I am not going to incur the wrath of Charlie.**

**Dean: She’s never going to forgive me. Is she?**

**Sam: We’ll see. For now, I do enjoy most of my life and would like to keep it.**

**Dean: Ugh, fine. I’ll text Jo.**

Dean put his cell phone down with all intention of getting back to work. After trying for five minutes to get his brain back into work mode, he gave up and grabbed his phone.

**Dean: What type of food does Cas like?**

He waited for ten minutes for a reply. His leg was bouncing at lightning speed the entire time with impatience.

**Jo: Well, good morning to you too, Dean. It’s such a lovely day. Isn’t it? Nice to know you’re still alive, asshole!**

_ Shit… I forgot to text her… _

**Dean: Sorry. I’m an asshole. How are you?**

**Jo: Eh, can’t complain. I’m happy you’re okay.**

**Dean: Thanks. So am I.**

**Jo: So, why do you need to know what kind of food he likes?**

**Dean: He invited me to his house tomorrow.**

**Jo: You’re going to his surprise welcome home party?**

**Dean: Yeah, he invited me.**

**Jo: Okay.**

He knew there was a question there that she wasn’t asking, but he dropped it and moved on.

**Jo: Anyway... You wanted to know what food he likes?**

**Dean: Yeah, I don’t want to show up empty-handed.**

**Jo: He loves burgers. Five Guys is his favorite.**

_ Cas loves burgers? How ‘bout that?  _ He smiled giddily.

**Dean: I can’t pick up Five Guys for him and no one else. What else does he like?**

**Jo: Have you ever been to Briermere’s?**

**Dean: What’s that?**

**Jo: You’ve never been to Briermere’s?**

**Jo: You call yourself a pie lover, and you’ve never been to Briermere’s? For shame, Winchester!**

**Dean: They make pie?**

**Jo: Pfft. Do they make pie...**

**Jo: briermere.com**

Dean clicked on the hyperlink. The site itself was nothing to go nuts over. The left menu had a selection for “pie list.” His jaw dropped when he clicked on it.  _ HOLY SHIT!!!! _

**Dean: There are almost thirty different kinds of pie on this list!**

**Jo: Told ya.**

**Dean: What should I get?**

**Jo: Peach Cherry. He loves their blueberry and peach muffins there, too.**

**Dean: Thanks, Jo! I owe you one!**

**Jo: You owe me fifty, Dean!**

He looked at his watch. It was a little before twelve.  _ Riverhead is about forty-five minutes away. I can make it there before they close. _ “I’m going out, Bobby!” Dean hollered as he grabbed his jacket and keys.

Bobby approached him with a scowl as he wiped his hand on a rag. “Where do you think you’re going?”

“I’m going to go get some pie. Want anything?” Dean added with a wide grin.

“No. ” H e glanced over at the clock on the shop wall. “It’s almost twelve. Do you really need pie this very minute?”

“They close at five, and it’s on Sound Avenue in Riverhead. I don’t want to drive out there tomorrow.”

“Oh, shit.” Bobby looked like he has been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. “Who told you about that place?”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Bobby. “You knew about pie Mecca, and you never told me?”

“Dean, you would be over four-hundred pounds right now if I told you about this place when Ellen told me,” Bobby rebuked as he shook his head. “Don’t go into a pie coma, son.”

Dean chuckled. “I won’t.”

“Bring Sam with you,” Bobby suggested. “It’s a farm after all. He’ll probably want some vegetables and shit. Stop at Lewin’s, too, if you bring him with you. He’ll go apeshit.”

“Okay,” he beamed.

Dean tore out of the shop’s parking lot like a bat out of hell. He ignored several traffic laws during the short trip back to his house. When he unlocked the door, he slammed it open. Sam, who was sitting on the couch, watching TV while he ate his lunch, jumped. His salad was now nothing but a mess on the floor.

“What the actual fuck, Dean!?” Sam chastised. “I was enjoying that!”

“Clean yourself and the salad up; we’re going to a farm!”

The bitch face Dean received from Sam put all of his other bitch faces to shame. “Seriously? That’s why you ruined my lunch? We’re going to a farm?”

“We’re getting organic fruit and vegetables from farm stands out east.”

That perked Sam right up. An excited smile lit up his entire face. “Really?! We are?!”

“Yup! Now, get dressed, bitch. I’d like to be out of here in ten.”

Sam shook his head and started to put the remnants of his lost lunch back into the bowl. “Jerk.”

 

>>>>>>

 

“So, how are we feeling, Castiel?” Dr. Roberts asked with a bright smile.

Castiel shrugged. “Better. I’m not a hundred percent, but I suppose that’s to be expected after being assaulted.”

“Touché,” she replied. She leafed through the papers of his chart. “Well, you’re in stable condition. We’ve avoided sepsis, thankfully. So, you’re definitely going home tomorrow afternoon.”

Castiel closed his eyes and sighed out a breath of relief. “Thank you, Dr. Roberts. I really can’t wait to go home.”

Becky, who was sitting at the foot of his bed, squeezed his blanket covered toes. “We can’t wait to have you home, sweetie.”

“I miss my bed,” Castiel admitted with a chuckle.

“Well, another twenty-four hours and you can greet it as an old friend,” Dr. Roberts promised.

Charlie cleared her throat from the corner. “Um, there are things he has to do when he gets home.”

Dr. Robert’s raised both eyebrows. “Well, as long as there is nothing strenuous, I don’t see why he would have to go to bed right away. Just don’t overdo it, Castiel. Not that I don’t enjoy having you around, but I don’t want to see you until it’s time for your check-up.”

“Understood, Dr. Roberts,” he confirmed with a nod of his head and a smile.

“Becky?” Dr. Roberts asked as she continued to review Castiel’s charts.

“Yes, Cara?” Becky responded.

“Come with me to the nurse’s station,” Dr. Roberts requested. “I have some things I would like to go over with you since I am not going to be here tomorrow.”

Becky nodded. “Of course.”

When Castiel was sure that Becky and Dr. Roberts were gone, he turned his attention towards Charlie. She was holding up a chunk of her hair and flicking the ends. “Hey, Charlie?”

She dropped her hair and smiled at him. “What’s up, bestie?”

His cuticles suddenly became very interesting. “Um… Well, I sort of invited Dean over to the party I’m not supposed to know about tomorrow.”

Her face fell into a scowl. “Is there a reason why you didn’t ask me first?”

“It’s my house, Charlie. I wasn’t aware that I had to ask permission,” he answered dryly.

“No. You don’t have to ask. I just wish you would have told me before you did,” she replied. She grabbed a chunk of her hair and started to play with it again. “I’m going to assume this means that you plan on trying to make it work with Dean?”

“I don’t plan on trying to have a relationship with him. I plan on trying to be his friend. A relationship of the romantic kind is out of the question,” he admitted.  _ At least for right now... _

She shrugged. “Whatever makes you happy.” She dropped her hair once again and smacked her hands together between her knees as she let out a deep breath. “Can I be honest about something, Castiel?”

He tilted his head and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “Of course.”

“I think that a lot of what happened this past week could have been prevented.”

“Understatement,” Castiel scoffed. “All he had to do was be honest with me from the start, and this would have never been a problem.”

“I’m not talking about him. I’m talking about you.”

Castiel’s eyebrows raised in shock. “Excuse me?”

“Look, don’t get me wrong, Castiel. I’m pissed at him about too many things to count. Still, you have to accept some of the blame in this,” she demanded. “He should have been honest. I’ll give you that. However, when was he supposed to tell you? I know you’re not sharing everything that he told you, which I understand. What’s private is private, but just think about it. If what happened in his past is something he doesn’t share with anyone, when do you think he would have been able to fit any of that in? You don’t share dirty secrets at work in front of coworkers and impressionable minds. You most certainly don’t do it through text!” she adamantlyinsisted as she shook her head. “I know you’re probably gonna hate me for this, but I’m gonna have to agree with him on this. You overreacted. You jumped to a major conclusion without giving him a chance to explain, and then you blacklisted him.”

Castiel went to open his mouth , but Charlie stopped him.

“Just hear me out before you go off on a tirade about how you’re right and I’m wrong. Okay?” Charlie requested.

“Fine,” Castiel replied with an exasperated sigh.

“Thank you,” she nodded. “Dean, on more than one occasion, has shown how much you mean to him. You have gushed to me every single time that guy has done anything for you,” she groaned as she shook her head.  Charlie lifted her hand and held down her left pinky with her right pointer as a way of showing she was about to list every event. “He defended you at Homecoming, not once, but twice. He has cornered Alastair multiple times about his behavior, just because he cares about you. Then last week, he put his life and entire career at risk to stop Alastair from killing you,” she finished by dropping both of her hands which smacked her thighs as she shook her head with irritation. “I don’t know, Castiel, but that sounds like someone who would do anything for you. What you did… You basically spat in his face and told him everything he did to prove himself to you meant nothing. I understand being upset, Castiel, I really do, but you went overboard.”

Castiel looked down at his knotted fingers. He knew when he was being scolded for bad behavior. She was right. “I was upset, Charlie. You know what Alastair did to me. You know how far he went in the locker room. You were there with me in the hospital last time Alastair attacked me,” he mentioned. “When it comes to him, I see red. Plain and simple. He broke me. He took away my spark when he… he raped me. When I found out that Dean had any kind of affiliation with him, I felt broken again,” Castiel admitted. He bowed his head and stifled a sob. “Dean, and I know you’ve seen it, he… Well, his encouragement and affection, was almost like a salve for the wounds Alastair and the others created back in eighth grade,” he croaked. “I don’t want to be broken again, Charlie. Not again . ”  H e started to cry in earnest. “I wouldn’t be able to survive it. I can’t, Charlie. I just can’t.”

Charlie hopped out of her seat in a flash and darted to Castiel’s side. She held him close as he shook in her arms.

When Castiel’s sobs began to subside, Charlie rubbed his back and gently pushed him away. She was already holding a tissue to help wipe his tears. He had no idea how she had managed to grab a tissue. He was attached to her like a leech, but he always assumed she had a little magic in her.

After a few more sniffles, Castiel finally spoke. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Charlie.”

She hugged him a little tighter. “You’ll never have to worry about that, bestie. I love you. I’ll always be there to pull your head out of your ass.”

He softly chuckled. He knew she what’s right. “I love you, too.”

They held each other for a few more moments until Becky came in with a stack of paperwork about Castiel’s home care. When she saw the state of Castiel, her face fell. “What’s wrong, sweetie?”

He shrugged and gave her a sorrowful grin. “Just being silly. You know me.”

Her eyebrows furrowed in bemusement. “Castiel, sweetheart, silly has never been a word I have used to describe you. Peculiar, intelligent, and selfless, yes, but silly?”

Charlie barked out a laugh then smacked a hand over her mouth. “I’m sorry,” she chuckled softly. “Peculiar? That’s funny. I would say weird, geeky, amazing, and loving,” she declared. She shrugged. “What do I know? I’ve only been your best friend for basically my entire life.” She placed a hand over her heart. “You are the Xander to my Willow.” Her face momentarily screwed up in disgust. “Except for the whole random love triangle in season three. I love you, Castiel, but I am so not into you that way. My heart belongs to Jo. Has for way too long,” she smiled sweetly.

Becky beamed. “I don’t think I’ve mentioned how happy I am about that, Charlie. I knew eventually it was going to happen. I didn’t know when, but I’m happy you guys have finally found each other.”

“She’s my Tara. ‘I will always find her.’”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Enough with the Buffy references! I may understand them, but you’re overdoing it, Charlie,” he complained. He narrowed his eyes at her. “Please. Do not tell me that you want to do another binge session of that show again,” he begged. “My favorite character leaves midway through season four.”

Charlie gave him puppy dog eyes and a boo-boo lip. “Please, Castiel!”

He rolled his eyes again and sighed. “Ugh, fine,” he conceded. He pointed a finger at her. “However, I have some conditions.”

She sat up straight. “Let me hear ‘em.”

“Top thirty favorite episodes. I am not watching all one hundred and forty-four episodes again. We’ve done that at least eight times now.”

She held out her hand. “Deal,” she agreed as they shook hands.

Becky shook her head as she grabbed her coat. “Come on, Charlie. Time for me to take you home.”

Charlie gave Castiel another hug and a quick kiss on the cheek. “Bye, bestie. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodbye, Charlie.”

Becky leaned forward slightly and kissed Castiel on the forehead. “Goodnight, hun. I will call you later. Okay?”

“Okay, mom. I love you.”

“I love you, too,” she smiled.

Both Charlie and Becky waved at Castiel and took their leave from the room.

Now that he was left alone with his thoughts, he knew without a shadow of a doubt that Charlie was right.  _ She’s usually right.  _ Maybe in the past Dean’s other partners have meant next to nothing to him, but Dean is one of those people who shows how he feels with actions, not words. Dean doesn’t want to speak about what he has already demonstrated Castiel on multiple occasions. Castiel knows that Dean cares deeply for him. He wouldn’t risk everything that he has worked hard for unless he did.

As Castiel watched the sunset, he realized friendship most certainly was never going to be an option for them. He wasn’t lying when he told Dean that he had been lost since the moment Dean took those keys from his hand. However, Dean jumped to a severe conclusion and wound up in his ex’s bed. Castiel may not have been innocent, but he still needed time to digest everything that has happened. Nevertheless, he knew he was immensely attracted to Dean, and he didn’t know how long he would be able to stave the feelings and urges he experienced when he was around him.  _ I’m not going to be able to keep my hands to myself, am I?  _ He covered his head with the blanket and willed himself to fall asleep. A series of some exceedingly depraved wet dreams did not make that easy.

 

>>>>>>

 

Heaven has been said to be many different things. Dean’s favorite interpretations have been  _ The Five People You Meet in Heaven, What Dreams May Come,  _ and he once watched a show where heaven was a series of your most treasured memories. However, after visiting Briermere’s, he was pretty sure that he had died and gone to pie heaven.  _ This really is pie Mecca! _

The line to purchase a pie was out the door when they first arrived. There were at least thirty people in front of him when he parked his baby in the dirt. The parking lot was out of spaces. He was honestly afraid when he pulled up that they would run out of pies by the time he was ready to order. As soon as he entered the frankly too small shop, he knew he was wrong. They had cases displaying the pies and other baked goods, but they had a massive room behind the counter that housed their stock. His jaw-dropping was entirely out of his control.

The smell of baked goods was overwhelming his senses. Pie was everywhere. There were muffins, cookies, jams, preserves, and a selection of produce that excited Sam a little too much. The pie... Dean knew that Bobby was right. He would definitely be over four-hundred pounds within the next five months.  _ I’m gonna need a bigger mouth! _

“What can I get ya, hun?” the brunette shopkeeper asked with an enormous smile.

“The shop,” he chuckled with all sincerity.

She threw her head back in a laugh. “You’re not the first person to order that, sweetie. Unfortunately, handsome, it’s not for sale.”

He pursed his lips as his eyes scanned over all of the pies. “Then I’ll just have to buy a lot of friggin pie. Won’t I?” he proposed with a crooked grin.

“Well, lucky for you, we’ve got a lot of friggin pie,” she smiled.

Sam appeared behind him. “Don’t spend all of your money, Dean.”

“I have two jobs, Sam! I can afford to buy a few pies,” he huffed.

A few pies was an egregious lie. Dean walked out of Briermere’s with the peach cherry pie for Cas and ten different kinds of pie all for himself.  _ I’ll share if Bobby and Sam ask nicely. Probably… Maybe… I’ll think about it. _ Not to mention, a dozen cookies and six muffins he bought.

Dean entered Lewin Farms on Google maps. He turned right as he exited the parking lot and continued down Sound Avenue towards the farm.

“Where are you going to put all of that pie, Dean?” Sam inquired with obvious worry.

“We have a freezer in the basement. Elizabeth gave me all the instructions on how to freeze and bake them,” he beamed.

“It’s a good thing we’re going to a farm. You’re going to have to eat nothing but vegetables to make up for all of the pie you’re going to be eating,” Sam lectured as he shook his head.

“I can’t live off rabbit food, man,” he snapped. “We’re going to this place purely for your enjoyment. Bobby said you would love this place.”

Thankfully, the farm wasn’t too far up the road from Briermere. They pulled into another dirt parking lot and walked into what could only be considered a giant indoor farmers market. There were bins everywhere overflowing with produce. Sam scampered off looking at everything with a massive smile on his face. Dean picked up a container of apple cider from one of the refrigerators and started to read the label.

“If you’re going to drink cider, you should really start with Jericho Cider Mill’s.”

Dean spun around and was stunned to see that his ex, Lisa, was smiling up at him. “Holy shit!” he exclaimed.

Lisa laughed. “Good to see you too, Dean.”

He shook his head to clear it. “Hey, Lis. What are you doing here?”

Lisa crossed her arms over her chest. “I would be asking you the same thing, but Sam kinda answered that question for me,” she smiled.

“Yeah, I usually wouldn’t be caught dead in here, but Sam… Well, you know,” he shrugged.

She nodded in understanding. “So… how’ve you been?”

“Okay. You?”

“Great. I’m here with Matt,” Lisa mentioned as she pointed toward him.

Dean definitely remembered him. Tall, dark, and handsome, just like he always was. He also couldn’t help but recall how she used him to make Matt jealous. “You guys are still together.”

It wasn’t a question, but Lisa answered anyway. “Yup, going on almost four years now.”

“I remember,” Dean stated as he tried to keep pettiness out of his tone. He knew it didn’t work.

She bowed her head. “I can’t apologize enough for how I treated you, Dean, especially after what happened with Cassie. I know she betrayed your trust, too.”

He smiled knowing full well that it was not meeting his eyes. “It’s fine,” he lied as he shrugged.

“No. It’s not,” Lisa admitted. “However, I know you’ll keep saying it is until you think I believe it.”

Of course, Matt had to chose that exact moment to walk over and smacked Dean on the back. “Hey, Dean!”

“Hi, Matt.”

“How are you?” he inquired with honest sincerity.

“You know... same shit, different day. You?”

“Great!” he announced. Matt faced Lisa. “We should go, babe.”

She nodded in agreement. “It was nice seeing you, Dean,” she said with a sad smile.

“You, too. The both of you,” he replied.

“Later, Dean!” Matt beamed.

“Bye,” Dean muttered.

He glared at his boots.

Sam barreled up from behind him with a cart filled with produce. “Dean! This place is amazing! We  **need** to come back here again.”

“Of course, Sammy,” he smiled half-heartedly.

Sam’s line of sight fell upon, from what Dean could tell, Lisa and Matt. His face fell. “I’m sorry, Dean. I know that’s probably the last thing you wanted to see today.”

Dean shrugged. “It’s fine. Let’s check out and go home. Okay?”

Sam nodded.

The drive home was filled with a comfortable silence. Dean was annoyed by the fact that Lisa was still with Matt after what had happened in high school. However, it was years ago and he never really felt like it would have gone anywhere anyway. It did bother him that she brought up Cassie. That situation was none of her business.

By the time they got home, it was after six. Sam and Dean spent time in the kitchen taking care of the food they had purchased in tandem. Dean prepared the pies for the freezer while Sam cleaned up his produce. They worked without speaking while classic rock played in the background.

Unfortunately, Sam felt the need to break the silence. “Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“You were always too good for her.”

Dean put down one of the pies and looked at Sam. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Who? Lisa?”

Sam nodded.

“She used me, Sam. Kinda puts her in the bitch column, don’t ya think?”

“True.”

“I seem to have a thing for bitches…” he paused. “Not those kinds of bitches… you know what I mean.”

“Castiel isn’t a bitch,” Sam pointed out.

Dean smiled crookedly. “No. He’s not.”

“You really like him, huh?”

_ Understatement. _ “Yeah, I do.”

Sam smiled with a nod. “Good. He likes you , too.”

Dean cocked an eyebrow. “Really? How do you know?”

Sam gave him a bitch face. “You haven’t been eating lunch with him every other day for the past two months. I have. Trust me. He likes you.”

“He doesn’t want me like I want him, Sam. He only wants to be friends.”

Sam bellowed a hearty laugh as he faced his produce again. “Trust me. Give it a couple of weeks.”

Dean beamed. “Really?”

Sam continued to shuck some of the corn they bought as he answered. “Really.”

They finished their separate tasks and cleaned up. After Dean put all of the pies in the freezer, he grabbed the bag of cookies and made his way to his room with a glass of milk. He watched a couple of episodes of Dr. Sexy as he made pornographic moans over the taste of the cookies.  _ Yup, four-hundred pounds. _ He finished eating the cookies, threw out his garbage in the kitchen, put his cup in the dishwasher, and got ready for bed.

He fell asleep with a smile on his as one thought replayed in his mind.  _ Give it a couple of weeks. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Briermere Farms, Jericho Cider Mill, and Lewin's are very real. If you're from Long Island, you know the deliciousness of those places.


	29. Chapter Twenty-Nine

Even though the party wasn’t due to start until three, Charlie had been at Castiel’s house since nine that morning decorating. She wanted to make sure every tiny detail was perfect. Instead of having it on the second floor, Charlie and Becky decided it would be best to throw the party on the first floor. That way, if or when he became too tired, they wouldn’t have to go too far to get him to his room. Luckily, Castiel’s house was equipped with a kitchen and living room on each floor, so Charlie didn’t have to run up and down the stairs a million times to make sure they would have everything ready for the party.

Charlie knew she was going a little overboard on the decorations, but she couldn’t find even the smallest part of her that really cared. Charlie had made and planned on making so much food. She didn’t know whether or not they would be able to make it or eat it all. There were cookies, cupcakes, tarts, tiny peanut butter and jelly sandwich wedges, chips, dip, vegetables, fruit salad, mini pigs in a blanket, hamburgers defrosting in the sink, pizza rolls, and plenty of candy supplied by Gabriel. A table had to be brought in from the garage to fit all of the food.

Gabriel was the first one to point out how insane the decorations were. The colors were too much. There were too many banners and decals. After an hour or so of that, Charlie sent him to his room. Assistance be damned.

By the time Jo arrived, at one, Charlie had already blown up at least fifty balloons, put up a few welcome home banners, and was starting on the rainbow streamers. She was going for a Beatles theme, so she needed a lot of colors.

Jo’s eyes grew wide with shock as she slowly approached the bottom of the stairs.

Charlie huffed in exasperation after seeing Jo’s expression. “What?”

“It’s very… loud in here, Charlie. Are we having a pride party or a welcome home party? I’m confused.”

Gabriel came out of his room after not helping for the last few hours, so he could make another snide remark.

“So help me, Gabriel, if you say one more thing, I will come over there and punch you in the face,” Charlie snarled.

He held both of hands up in surrender. “Geez, someone is a little touchy.”

“A little touchy? Oh, that’s it,” she barked as she stomped over to Gabriel.

Jo stepped in front of her. “Woah! Don’t let him get to you!”

“Don’t let him… He’s been making comments about every little thing all fucking morning, Jo!” Charlie hollered.

“Yeah? Since when is that a surprise?” Jo asked as she put her hands on her hips. “He’s always making comments. That’s just Gabriel.”

“Exactly, Charlie. I can’t hel…”

Jo got right into Gabriel’s face. “Me telling her not to hit you does not give you a free pass, Gabriel. I am more than likely to hit you if you don’t knock it off!”

“You’re feisty. I like it,” Gabriel said with a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows.

Charlie balled her fists at her sides. “I’m gonna wring your fucking neck you…”

“Charlie!” Jo hissed as she put a hand on her chest.

“Well, that’s my cue to leave and lock myself in my room until everyone else gets here,” Gabriel snickered as he sauntered back to his room, thoroughly proud of himself.

“I wish you would have let me hit him. You have no idea what I’ve been dealing with all morning,” Charlie huffed.

“How about this? If you promise not to hit him for the rest of the day, I’ll plan a little treat for you,” Jo disclosed as she wrapped her arms around Charlie’s neck.

Charlie’s eyebrows shot up. “Really? Like what?”

Jo whispered in Charlie’s ear. “It’s a surprise.”

A broad smile spread across Charlie’s face. “Costumes?”

Jo leaned in and gave Charlie a lingering kiss then replied, “It’s a surprise.”

Charlie smiled and kissed Jo with a little more heat.

“Oh, God! Is this what I showed up two hours early for?”

Jo was the one who broke the kiss. “No, Meg, you showed up early to help us.”

Meg surveyed the room. “Did a leprechaun vomit in here or some shit? What the fuck is with all of the rainbows? Should I be looking for a pot of gold?”

Charlie could feel her blood once again start to boil. “It’s Beatles themed, Meg,” she growled through gritted teeth.

“Where’s the Beatles shit, then?” Meg asked with a stink face. Her eyes continued to roam around the room as she picked apart Charlie’s hard work. “From what I can tell, it’s nothing but rainbows and glitter.”

Charlie threw her hands up. “You and Gabriel, I swear! I haven’t had a chance to hang everything up yet. I am only one person!” she roared as she held up one finger in Meg’s face.

Meg screwed up her face with an expression that clearly stated,  **What the fuck?** “Geez, lighten up, Red. What do you need help with?”

Charlie huffed out a deep breath. “I need help hanging the yellow submarines, Sgt Pepper’s stuff, Magical Mystery tour stuff, and a giant green apple needs to go over the food.”

“We got this, babe,” Jo promised with a kiss on Charlie’s cheek.

Charlie blushed. “Thanks, hun.”

Meg rolled her eyes. “Come on. Let’s finish this atrocity to the senses.”

“Meg,” Charlie snarled.

Meg held up both hands in surrender. “Whatever you want, mistress.”

Charlie nodded once, stiffly. “Don’t you forget it.”

“Wow…”

Charlie spun around to face the stairwell.

Sam’s eyes were wide with both shock and horror. “It’s… well… it’s really  **bright** in here.”

Meg cackled where she stood by the couch. “Watch what you say, Moose. She may decapitate you.”

“I hate all of you!” Charlie barked.

“Nice decorations. Cas is gonna love it! Beatles, right?” Dean inquired as reached the bottom of the stairs.

Charlie’s jaw dropped. “Yeah… Um… How’d you know?”

“Well, kind of obvious with the way stars are set up over there,” he replied as he pointed over to the window. “Looks like the album for  _ Magical Mystery Tour _ ,” he grinned. “Do you have the rainbow words for the album cover to put underneath it?”

“Um… well, not exactly,” she explained as she walked over to the pile of stuff she brought with her for decorating. “I made my own. Instead of it saying ‘Tour,’ it says ‘Party.’” She shrugged. “I think it works.”

Dean hovered behind her. “Looks good to me!” he beamed. “Need help hanging stuff?” he asked. He looked down at the white box in his hands. “On second thought, where should I put the pie and muffins?”

Charlie’s eyebrows furrowed as she looked at the boxes. When she saw the emblem for Briermere’s, she inhaled deeply with shock. Then proceeded to choke on her own spit. “You”{cough} “drove” {cough} “all the way” {cough} “to Riverhead?” she asked as she continued to cough.

Dean started to pat Charlie on the back. “You okay?”

“You’re actually not supposed to do that,” Gabriel informed as he exited his room.

The patting instantly stopped. “Sorry… Didn’t know. I was always told to do that.”

“It’s a common misconception. Slapping, patting, etcetera, does nothing but cause the invasion to fall into the airway, further blocking it,” Gabriel continued.

“Again… didn’t know. Sorry,” Dean repeated.

Gabriel shrugged. “Now you know.”

Charlie had finished her coughing fit by the time they finished their exchange. “Thank you, Gabriel. Much appreciated,” Charlie said without a hint of sarcasm.

“Anytime, Red,” Gabriel replied, then entered the downstairs living room to help Meg, Sam, and Jo with their task of hanging Beatles memorabilia.

“So, pie and muffins,” Dean began. “Where am I putting them?”

“There’s a kitchen right behind me,” she said as she leaned back and spun while pointing. “We can stick it in the fridge,” she suggested. She opened the fridge and shook her head in disbelief. “Castiel is going to freak when he sees the boxes. It’s been months since he’s had Briermere’s. How did you know what to get?” she asked as she looked at the labels on the boxes Dean handed her.

“Jo told me,” he admitted. He rubbed the back of his neck. “I uh… I wanted to surprise him with something special.”

Charlie gently placed the boxes in the fridge and closed the door. She narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest while leaning all of her weight on her left hip. “What’re your intentions, Winchester?” she questioned with a withering stare. “Treats like these don’t generally mean friendship, buddy.”

Dean bowed his head, avoiding Charlie’s scathing expression. “Cas isn’t interested in anything but that, Charlie. You know that as well as I do,” he mentioned. “I’m doing what friends do. Which, of course, is to make their friends feel better when they’re sick. Or in this case, injured. Hence, pie and muffins,” he explained with a shrug.

Charlie gave Dean a once-over while pursing her lips. “Well,” she started, “Just know, Winchester, if you hurt him, I will beat you to death with a shovel.”

Dean barked out a laugh. “Thanks, Willow. I appreciate the warning.”

Her expression brightened as a smile spread across her face. “You’ve watched  _ Buffy? _ ”

“Yeah, of course. One, Joss Whedon is a genius. Two, between one of my exes and my buddy Benny’s vampire obsession, didn’t really have a choice.”

Charlie’s jaw dropped. She quickly recovered from her shock the once again narrowed her eyes at him and poked him in the chest. “Don’t think that because you just happen to know some random line from one of my favorite TV shows that the shovel plan won’t happen.”

“Well, again, I appreciate the warning. ‘A vague disclaimer is nobody’s friend,’” he quoted with a shit-eating grin.

“Okay… bonus points for being able to quote the next line, but you’re still not off of my shit list, Dean.”

“At least I tried,” he said with a shrug.

Charlie hit him with one final quote. She had to test his nerdiness. “‘Do or do not. There is no try.’”

Dean chuckled as he shoved his hands in his pockets. “Oh, Charlie... I think you just became one of my new best friends,” he declared with a wide grin. “Quoting Yoda?” he added, putting a hand over his heart. “You just made my day.”

Charlie gave him one last once-over. “Unfortunately for you, Dean, the position for bestie has already been filled by Castiel,” she reminded him. “But you’re okay, Dean. Just don’t hurt him, okay?”

“Never,” he replied without hesitation.

She raised an eyebrow at him.

“Well, again. I swear,” he promised.

“Good. Because, again, shovel.”

“Got it,” he confirmed. He smacked his hands in front of him and rubbed them together. “So, what do you need help with?”

“A lot, still, actually.”

“Point me to where you want me.”

“Follow me,” she smiled.

 

>>>>>>

 

“Mom, I’m injured. Not an invalid,” Castiel groaned. “I don’t need the wheelchair to exit the hospital.”

“Hospital policy, sweetie. You’re not allowed to exit the building without being in the chair,” Becky explained as they entered the elevator.

Castiel rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. “I can walk, you know?”

“Yes, I am thoroughly aware that you can walk. You’ve been walking since you were eleven months,” Becky retorted.

“I’m so done being horizontal. I can walk! I can move! I may not be running anytime soon, but I can still walk!”

“Castiel!” she snapped. “I am not the hospital. I just work here. They make the rules, not me. Now stop complaining. We’re almost out of here. As soon as we’re outside those doors, you can go for a walk. Until then, suck it up and deal with it.”

He knew he sounded like a petulant jerk, but he was done sitting. As soon as he saw the doors leading to the outside, his heart started to race.  _ Only another fifteen feet ‘til freedom! _ When those automatic doors opened, and he felt the first blast of fall air on his skin, he hobbled away from the wheelchair and smiled.

“Come on. We don’t have all day.”

_ Oh, yeah, the party. _ “I forgot,” he pouted.

“Oh, come on. Are you not excited to see everyone? I know everyone is excited to see you,” Becky added with an encouraging smile.

“I am excited,” he admitted, “I just… I don’t know…”

“Is it because Dean is going to be there?”

Castiel shrugged. “A little bit.”

“You know that nurses talk, right? Tessa kinda filled me in on a little of what’s been going on this past week,” she confessed.

_ Of course, she did…  _ “How much did she tell you?”

“Well, she told me that there is a lot of drama there. Apparently, you guys had some sort of conversation on Friday while I was making my rounds in the ICU,” she mentioned as she crossed her arms over her chest. “She also told me that you two have the longing stares down to a science,” she jested with a wiggle of her eyebrows.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “There were no longing stares, Mom.”

“Charlie told me he is the reason why Alastair… Well, the reason why Alastair didn’t,” she took in a shaky breath, “You know what I mean.”

“Yes, mom, he broke Alastair’s nose. Stopped him from kicking me again,” he admitted as he bowed his head. “I know I should have informed Officer Stover of Dean’s involvement.”

“If he is the reason why you are standing in front of me right now, Castiel, I can understand why you didn’t admit to him being there. However, Castiel, he was a witness. Alastair…”

“Alastair would have found another way to get away with what he did. Just like last time. You know that I’m right about that, mom,” he insisted. “Dean would be in a jail cell right now if I told Officer Stover about him. He could kiss his teaching career goodbye if anyone found out.”

Becky cast her attention to the ground where she was fidgeting on her feet for a few seconds, worrying her bottom lip. She peered up at him through her lashes. “You know the fact that he is a student teacher bothers me, right?”

“He’s only three years older than me, mom. Not fifteen. I’m not some tenth grader obsessed with their much older teacher. Plus, he is not technically a teacher he’s a student teacher and teaching assistant,” he ranted.

She held her hands up in surrender. “I’m only saying this is crossing some lines what you two have going on here.”

Castiel rolled his eyes, something he found himself doing a lot more since he met Dean. “We’re just friends, mom. I am not pursuing anything more than that with him.”

“Well, again, Castiel, nurses talk. I’ve heard about the way he looks at you. Friendship does not seem to be what he has in mind for the two of you.”

Castiel minutely shook his head. “Friendship is all he is getting from me. So, he better learn to accept it.”

Becky shrugged. “If you say so.” She looked around the parking lot. “Let’s get you home. You have a ‘surprise party’ to get to.”

Castiel softly chuckled. “Yeah, such a surprise.”

He was surprised to find that when he got to the car, Chuck and Hannah were in there waiting for them. “What are you two doing here?”

“We was waiting for you, Castiel,” Hannah smiled. She was not confined to her car seat, so she hopped out of the car to hug him. Just before she was about to wrap her arms around him, she froze. She furrowed her eyebrows and worried her lip. She moved her eyes between Castiel and Becky for a few moments before they remained on Becky. “Can I hug him? I don’t want to make his booboos worse, mama,” she urged with a pout. “I don’t want to hurt my brother.” Her eyes started to glisten as she started to feel discouraged from her original goal. Her lip started to quiver. “I’m sorry, Castiel. Can I hug you?”

“Of course, sweetie! Just not too tight and not out here where you’ll only be hugging my leg, okay?” he added.

Her face lit up. “Okay! Are we going to watch  _ Moana _ when we get home?”

Castiel and Becky chuckled. They could hear Chuck’s muffled laughter from inside the car. “Not today,” Becky answered. “Maybe tomorrow. Okay, sweetheart?”

“Okay, mama!”

Hannah climbed back into the car and waited for Castiel to be seated before she gave him the gentlest of hugs and placed a sweet kiss on his cheek. “I love you, Castiel,” she whispered.

“Love you, too,” he replied.

Hannah beamed as she sat down in her seat and buckled herself in. She turned to him proudly. “I can buckle all by myself, Castiel. See?”

“Yes. I can.”

“She’s a big girl now. Right, pumpkin?” Chuck smiled.

“Uh-huh,” she nodded emphatically.

“How’s it going, kid?” Chuck inquired.

Castiel shrugged. “Still alive, thankfully. Ready to go home.”

Chuck chuckled. “I bet.”

“Everyone’s seat belts buckled?” Becky checked as she clicked her own in.

“Uh-huh. I’m a big girl, mama!” Hannah exclaimed.

“Yes, you are!” Becky praised. She looked in the rearview mirror at Castiel. “Buckled?”

“Yes,” he answered.

“Home, here we come,” Becky smiled.

Luckily, Hannah was in an agreeable mood, so she didn’t have a problem with them spending the twenty-minute car ride listening to Chopin. Castiel wasn’t particularly in the mood to listen to anything with words. Piano music, especially Chopin and Beethoven, always had a soothing effect on him. He needed peace at that moment, so he was thankful that Hannah was willing to forgo the  K idz  B op for the day.

He always enjoyed driving down Sunrise Highway. Not only was the scenery vastly more enjoyable this far east on the island, but it was the first highway he ever had a chance to drive on. It was terrifying as all hell, but a treasured memory nonetheless.

When they pulled into the driveway, Castiel knew, even though there was not a car in sight, there were guests inside waiting to welcome him home.  _ Ugh, I don’t want a party right now. I want to enjoy my room and my bed. _

Becky helped him out of the car and to the front door while Chuck walked ahead with Hannah to open the door.

After they entered the house, his mom led him in the direction of the downstairs.  _ Oh, thank God. Whoever decided to do it down there, thank you! _

They only made it halfway down the stairs before everyone yelled surprise. Castiel let his eyes survey the room.  _ What the hell?  _ “Um… did a unicorn fart in here or something? Why are there so many rainbows?”

Everyone, but Charlie, laughed. “Ugh, it’s Beatles themed,” she explained as she pointed to a yellow submarine hanging from the ceiling. “See, Beatles.”

His eyes narrowed as he continued to observe his surroundings. “Uh-huh…” He began to notice all of the little details that clearly stated Beatles. Still, the rainbows were throwing him off. “No offense, Charlie, it looks like Elton John’s essence was exuded all over this room. Don’t get me wrong. I appreciate the sentiment, but I can’t decide whether or not it’s a party celebrating my homecoming or my sexuality.”

Charlie sighed. “Well, we never had a party for that. So, let’s call it a two - in - one. How about that?”

Castiel chuckled and shook his head with amusement.  _ Only Charlie… _ “Deal.”

She wrapped her arms around him in a soothing embrace. “Welcome home, bestie.”

He closed his eyes and squeezed her a little tighter. “Thank you, Charlie.”

She let him go and shrugged. “Eh, what are friends for?”

“I personally would have let him be, but…”

“No one asked you, Meg,” Charlie snapped.

Castiel’s eyes widened. “Charlie,” Castiel admonished.

“You would not  **believe** the shi…” she paused as she took in her audience. Hannah was talking to Gabriel over by his bedroom door. “Sugar I have been getting all morning about my decorations.”

“Understandably so, Charlie,” Castiel said as he once again let his eyes gaze over the room’s decorations. “It’s… loud in here,” he explained. He noticed all of the smiling faces in the room waiting for him to greet them. One, in particular, was burning holes through his skull with how hard he was staring. “I got people to say hi to, Charlie. Thank you again.”

“Yeah, yeah. Uh-huh. Pick on my decorations and then thank me. Butthead.”

“Love you, too,” he chuckled.

Jo was the next person to say hello. “Hey, Castiel,” she said with a light hug. “You look better than you did on Monday. Definitely soberer.”

“Yeah, painkillers will do that,” he laughed.

“I’ve heard.”

“All right, Clarence. Stop letting everyone occupy all of your time. It’s my turn,” Meg interjected as she wrapped her arms around his side.

Castiel patted the top of her head. “Hello, Meg.”

She glared up at him. “What the fudge? Am I a fudging dog?”

Castiel and Jo snickered.

“What?”

“It’s just funny,” Jo answered.

Meg looked utterly confused. “What’s funny?”

“You not cursing. It’s hilarious,” Jo explained.

“Oh, fudge you! I’m trying to watch my language around the kid! I’m not always crass. I can mind my manners!” Meg declared.

Jo held up her hands in surrender. “I stand corrected. It’s still not any less hilarious. Just F.Y.I.”

Meg rolled her eyes and stomped off in the direction of the overflowing snack table.

_ Who the hell is eating all of that, Charlie? _

“Hi, Castiel! Quite a vibrant party Charlie planned here,” Sam noted as he approached Castiel , h appy puppy dog face fully in place.

“Yes. She sure knows how to overwhelm me on a constant basis,” Castiel acknowledged. He shivered. “Kind of freaks me out, to be perfectly honest.”

“I’ll help by tearing it all down later if you’d like,” Sam offered with a maniacal grin.

Castiel chuckled. “I would greatly appreciate that. Thank you,” Castiel smiled. He felt winded. “I need to sit down. Seriously injured and all. I shouldn’t be standing too long.”

“The couch is all set for you, Cas.”

Castiel blushed at the criminally gorgeous man in front of him. “Hello, Dean.”

Dean’s face lit up like the morning sun. “Heya, Cas.”

“How are you?”

“Great. You?”

“Injured,” Castiel deadpanned.

“Let me help you,” Dean offered with a worried expression.

“Injured, not completely impaired. I can make it to the couch,” Castiel said as he waved everyone off.

“You got it, Cas.”

When Castiel was seated, he closed his eyes and let his head fall back.  _ Oh, God, it’s so good to be home. _ He felt a little body come and crawl up next to him. He opened one eye and peered down at the smiling face of his little sister. “What’s up, Hannah?”

“I missed you,” she replied.

“I missed you, too.”

Dean sat down on one of the lounge chairs and smiled at the two of them.

“Dean?” Castiel asked.

“Yeah?”

“Have you met my little sister, Hannah?”

“No,” Dean beamed at the little girl. “Hello, Hannah. It’s nice to meet you.”

Hannah shrunk into Castiel’s side. “Hi.”

“I like your shirt. Is that…  _ Tangled _ ?” Dean questioned.

Hannah grabbed her shirt as if she didn’t know what she was wearing. “It’s Rapunzel. I like her. She’s not my favorite,” she admitted as she shook her head.

“Who is your favorite?” Dean asked. “Are you a  _ Frozen _ kind of chick?” he continued with an inquiring eyebrow.

“Bleh!” Hannah exclaimed as she shook her head vigorously. “No!”

Dean’s smile widened. “I’m not a big fan of that movie either.”

Castiel tilted his head in bemusement.  _ Does Dean watch Disney movies? _

“Who is your favorite princess?” Dean asked again.

“Moana,” she answered as if it shouldn’t even be a question. “Obviously.”

“I’ve never seen that one,” Dean responded.

Hannah sat at the edge of the couch with a slack-jawed expression. “You’ve never watched  _ Moana _ !”

“No, is it good?” Dean inquired.

“It’s only like the bestest movie ever!” Hannah shot up and grabbed the Roku remote to put it on. “Castiel sings and dances for me when we watch it together.”

Both of Dean’s eyebrows shot up as he turned to Castiel with a smirk. “Really?”

_ Fuck you, Hannah… _

“Yeah! Castiel has a pretty voice. I like when he sings to me,” she confessed.

“I’d definitely like to hear him sing sometime,” Dean replied with a soft smile as his eyes remained on Castiel.

“He dances too! Remember?” Hannah reminded Dean.

“Yes, you mentioned. I don’t think he should be doing any dancing right now,” Dean added.

Hannah bowed her head and put the remote down. “That’s right. Castiel is hurt,” she remembered. She glanced at Castiel. “I’m sorry, Castiel. I forgot.”

Castiel shot her a crooked smile. “It’s okay, Hannah. Some other time. Mom said not today anyway, right?”

“Oh yeah,” she said as she smacked her forehead with the palm of her hand. “Duh. I’m so silly,” she mentioned. She made funny faces and monkey noises while dancing around the living room in an attempt to prove her silliness. She hopped back on the couch next to Castiel. “Castiel?”

“Yes?”

“Can Dean come over and watch Moana with us tomorrow?”

Castiel furrowed both of his eyebrows.  _ It took her four months to even think about talking to Kali. It took Dean five minutes to win her over… Huh… _ “I don’t know. He’s pretty busy all day on Mondays, Hannah. Plus, he does have oth...”

“I’m free every other day after you get out of school,” Dean interrupted with a smile so broad it could split his face.

She jumped onto the floor and grabbed Castiel’s hands, shaking them with excitement. “Can he come over on Tuesday, Castiel? PLEASE?!” she whined.

Castiel blushed. He swore he could feel the smirk Dean was giving him. “Well, if it’s okay with Dean and mom, it’s okay with me.”

She spun to Dean with unbridled jubilance. “Will you come over on Tuesday, Dean?”

“Of course, sweetheart,” he said with a wink and a smile in Castiel’s direction.

Castiel felt his heart stop. He swallowed hard.  _ He knows what that does to me… _

Dean must have noticed something changed in the air between them. His face sobered and he took a stuttered breath.

Hannah ran off squealing with glee in the direction of their mom. Her excitement only intensified when Becky must have agreed that it was okay that Dean came over on Tuesday.

“Sorry, Cas,” Dean began. “I can’t help it. I… I’ll try harder to not do stuff like that. I… Well, not for nothing Cas, I can’t control myself around you sometimes. You just… I’m trying to be your friend. I am your friend,” he said as if he were trying to convince himself more than Castiel. “I’m sorry.”

“I know what you mean, Dean.”

Dean locked eyes with Castiel. “Really?”

“Just because…ugh…” he paused. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he continued. “I still want you, Dean. You know I do,” he added. His eyes fell on Dean’s lips. He could still remember the way they felt when they were pressed up against his. “Your presence, it weakens my resolve.”

Dean licked his lips.

He felt the wave of arousal rush through him. He shivered and bit his lip to stifle a groan.  _ Fuck! _ He once again locked eyes with Dean. His gaze had darkened. “You don’t play fair, Dean. You know what… Just, stop being pretty. Okay?”

Dean chuckled. “Um... How am I supposed to do that, Cas?”

Castiel huffed out a quick laugh. “I don’t know. Is that even possible with you?”

He shrugged. “I kind of just wake up looking like this.”

Castiel surveyed the area. Hannah was near the kitchen babbling with excitement to their mom about Tuesday. “Fuck you, Dean!”

“Hey! I’ve seen you on your so-called  **_bad day_ ** . You have the same curse as I do, dude. You wake up pretty, too.”

“Oh, God. Should I just go back to the kitchen?” Meg asked as she plopped down next to Castiel. “'Cause I just left the nauseating display that is Jo and Charlie over there. Is that what I should expect over here , too?”

Dean cleared his throat. “Where’s Sammy?”

She shrugged as she took a sip of her soda. She made a satisfied “ah,” sound and then pointed near the stairwell. “Talking to Gabriel.”

Castiel tilted his head. “About what?”

“How the fudge am I supposed to know?” Meg asked as she took another sip of her soda. “I don’t particularly care.”

Dean huffed out a breathy chuckle. “You have such a warming presence, Meg. It is Meg, right?”

“Yeah, and of course, you’re Dean. Clarence here’s dream boat,” Meg said with a wicked grin.

Castiel’s face flushed. “Meg,” he snarled.

“What? !  Like it’s a big fudging secret. God! You spent two infuriating months  **obsessing** over the guy. ‘Oh, Meg. Oh, Charlie. Why does he keep tor…’”

Castiel slapped his hand over her mouth. “Shut the fudge up, Meg!” Castiel hissed.

Meg licked his palm.

“Ew, Meg! Gross!”

“Serves you right, Castiel. Don’t touch the face!” Meg warned.

“My apologies.”

“Castiel, I’m gonna put the burgers on the grill. How many do you want?” Chuck asked.

“Two, please,” Castiel replied.

Chuck’s eyebrows shot up. “Only two?”

Castiel pursed his lips in contemplation. “Make it three. Just in case.”

“Chuck!” Becky called.

“Yeah, hun?”

“Just grill them all up. We can send people home with food. Lord knows we have enough.”

“Yeah. Understatement, Becky,” Chuck scoffed.

Dean stood up. “Do you need help with anything, Mr. Shurley?”

“No. I’m fine. Dean, right?” Chuck inquired while pointing a finger at him.

“Yes, sir.”

“Thank you, Dean, for the offer, but I can grill a few burgers with no problem,” Chuck smiled.

“You’re welcome, sir,” Dean said with a nod.

“Chuck, please. You’re making me feel old,” he laughed.

“Sorry… Chuck,” Dean grinned.

“No problem,” he responded , then turned to Charlie. “Burgers in the fridge down here or upstairs?”

“Down here. In the sink.”

Chuck walked towards the downstairs kitchen with a final nod.

Meg cocked an eyebrow. “Trying to make nice with the parentals, huh , Dean?”

_ I swear, I’m going to punch her today. _

“It’s called manners, Meg. You should try using them sometime,” Dean suggested , then meandered in the direction of the kitchen.

“Pfft… I have manners!” she argued.

“In your opinion,” Castiel corrected.

“Oh, shut up!” Meg snapped.

Castiel chuckled.

“Yeah, laugh it up , fuzzball!”

Charlie took the seat that Dean was just occupying.  “How’s the party going so far, bestie?”

“Pretty well. Thank you, again.”

Jo joined the group by sitting on Charlie’s lap and blocking Charlie from Castiel’s line of sight.

“There are other seats, Jo,” Meg mentioned before she drained what was remaining in her cup.

“Yes, I know. This seat is comfier,” Jo stated. She wrapped her arm around Charlie’s neck and placed a kiss on her cheek.

Meg screwed up her face in disgust. “You two are going to make me sick.”

“I second that,” Castiel agreed with a raise of his hand.

“You’re just jealous,” Jo retorted then planted another kiss on Charlie’s cheek which was completely red.

Castiel glanced over in Dean’s direction. Both he and Becky were laughing at whatever Hannah had just said.  _ You’re right… I am. _

“So who’s up for board games or something?” Charlie questioned. “I have Uno!”

“No!” Castiel, Meg, and Jo said in unison.

“Why not?” Charlie argued with a pout. “Uno is fun!”

“The last time we played Uno, you threw a mug at me for giving you a draw two for three turns in a row,” Meg supplied in answer to Charlie’s argument.

“Well, that was just evil,” Charlie replied.

“No. What’s evil was you throwing a mug filled with hot cocoa at me for not having any other card in the color blue besides draw two,” Meg rebutted.

“It wasn’t full!”

“IT WAS STILL HOT, CHARLIE!” Meg snapped.

“Ladies, ladies,” Gabriel intervened , h is voice as smooth and sweet as honey. “No need to argue over the past. Meg only sustained minor injuries.” Meg went to open her mouth, but Gabriel silenced her with a raise of his hand. “And Charlie, you know we outlawed that game after that incident, so don’t even try to bring that game back into this house, especially since my little bro, over here, is already injured,” he said as he ruffled up Castiel’s already messed up hair.

Charlie buried her head into Jo’s side. “Fine,” Charlie groaned.

“So, I’m out of here,” Gabriel announced.

“What?!” Charlie screeched.

“He’s going and seeing a movie with his girlfriend, Kali,” Sam supplied for Gabriel as he plopped down on the floor next to the coffee table in front of the TV.

“You could have invited her to the party,” Jo suggested.

Gabriel laughed. “Yeah, no. Castiel doesn’t like her, and she frightens Hannah.”

“Remind me again why you’re dating her?” Castiel added with a smirk.

“You’d be lucky to find yourself a Kali,” Gabriel pointed out. “She’s a spitfire in and out of the bedroom,” he added with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle.

Meg threw a pillow at Gabriel’s head. “Do you even have a filter?”

“Pfft… Filters are for quitters,” Gabriel said, then strutted to the stairs. “Farewell! Don’t miss me too much while I’m gone.”

Everyone over by the couches groaned

“BYE, GABRIEL!” Hannah hollered after him as he bounded up the stairs.

Castiel huffed out a sigh. “So… board games…”

 

>>>>>>

 

Considering how Dean’s morning started, he was incredibly surprised at how well the party was going. When he woke up, the uninhibited level of excitement and dread invading his consciousness was unnerving. If he were, to be honest with himself, he didn’t know exactly how to feel about the day ahead of him. Dean couldn’t wait to spend some actual time with Cas. Up until this point, except for the hospital and the one time he drove Cas home, all of their interactions took place during something school related. Of course, it was a party, so technically it wasn’t going to be personal time, but he would take what he could get. Even so, he was pretty sure he was about to walk into a house filled with people who despised him.

Sam was definitely not making his morning any easier. He spent an exorbitant amount of time calling Dean out on his obsessive need to perfectly sculpt his hair. In an attempt to shut Sam up, Dean pointed out that Sam had an obscene amount of hair products at his disposal. Dean argued that Sam had just as much of an obsession with his hair as Dean did had with his own. Sam just shrugged it off and said long hair needs more maintenance, short hair doesn’t. In short, evidently, Dean has no excuse.

When they finally arrived at Castiel’s house at around one, Dean entered the house and tried not to assume crash positions. The door was unlocked, and Sam was informed earlier that day, through text, just to come inside when they get there. Dean let Sam go in first without him so he could gather his nerves before he had no other choice but to go inside. He recognized what Charlie was attempting to do when he entered the first floor. Still, he had to agree with everyone in the room when they said it looked like someone shit sparkles and farted rainbows all over the place, but Charlie was Cas’ best friend, and he didn’t feel like making things worse than they already were. However, after the short, semi-threatening conversation they had in the kitchen when she put the pie and muffins in the fridge for him, he knew that they could definitely be friends if she gave him a chance to prove that he wasn’t a total dick.

Dean didn’t realize how nervous he was about meeting Castiel’s parents until they walked into the room. He already knew that Gabriel was not his biggest fan. While they were decorating the living room, things seemed to be civil between them, but who knows what Gabriel had told his parents about him. The only thing they probably knew about him was that he was a student teacher at their son’s school.  _ They probably think I’m some sort of sexual predator or some shit. _

What Dean had not expected was that Castiel had a little sister. Dean was great with kids. When he first started college, his original intention had been to go into elementary education. Children have so much spirit , s o much life. He wanted to be able to fuel those fires and enrich their lives with music. Eventually, he decided to go for secondary education instead since he wanted to help wayward youths find their way through music education. Music saved his life , p lain and simple. Why wouldn’t he help other achieve the same end?

The instant he started talking to Hannah, he knew he had won her over. Dean’s secret obsession with Disney movies finally paid off. The fact that winning her over got him another day with Cas, this time not during a party, was just icing on top of the metaphorical cake. The new, for lack of a better word, date was going to be all the more interesting because apparently, Cas liked to sing to his sister during the movie. He had been wondering for a little over two months what Cas’ singing voice would sound like.  _ Moana _ was his chance to hear it finally.

The major problem that Dean was having when it came to the party, and being around Cas in general, was that he couldn’t help but flirt with him. He knew by the face Cas had made when he winked and smiled at him that being friends really was going to be close to impossible. He didn’t want just friendship with Cas. Sure, being able to talk to Cas was nice, but he wanted him. From the heat in Cas’ eyes when Dean licked his lips, Dean could tell that Cas wanted him , too. He didn’t want that moment to end, but of course, it’s a party, someone had to ruin it.

Dean knew he liked Charlie. He could definitely understand why Cas would be friends with her. Meg, on the other hand, was something else. He appreciated her blatant honesty, especially since it revealed a little bit about Cas, but something about her just irked him. After about a minute or two of being in her presence, he decided it would be better for him to take her in only small doses and went to the kitchen to introduce himself to Cas’ mom.

Hannah was rambling on about something when he approached. He was pretty sure that he heard something about himself and princesses.

“Hello, Mrs. Shurley. I figured it would best for me to come and introduce myself,” Dean began.

“Yes, I think it is, Dean,” she concurred. “But considering how much I have heard about you from everyone, I don’t think that an introduction is strictly necessary.”

_ Shit… this is what I was worried about. _ “Oh… Um, what have you heard? All good things I hope,” Dean added with a smile.

She shrugged. “Depends on who you ask.”

Hannah tugged on Dean’s shirt to get his attention. “Dean! Mommy said you can watch  _ Moana _ with Castiel and me.”

“That’s right. I’m very excited to watch it,” Dean admitted with complete sincerity.

Hannah rolled her eyes. “Well, duh! It’s only the best movie I ever saw.”

“I have ever seen, sweetie. Not I ever saw,” Becky corrected.

“I was telling my mommy that you have eyes like Rapunzel. They’re the greenest green to ever green.” Hannah babbled.

Cas’ mom and Dean snickered in response.

“Thank you, Hannah. I appreciate the compliment,” Dean smiled as he continued to laugh.

“No. That’s not a compliment. That’s a fact,” she explained. “Do you want to play dolls with me, Dean?”

Dean's eyes widened as he turned to Mrs. Shurley. “Uh… Well, I…”

Gabriel interrupted momentarily. “Farewell! Don’t miss me too much while I’m gone.”

“BYE, GABRIEL!” Hannah hollered as he took the stairs two at a time.

_ Where is he going? _

“Hannah? Dean is a guest at your brother’s party. You can play dolls with him some other time,” Mrs. Shurley said with a gentle smile for her daughter.

“Please! He’s my friend, too, mama!” Hannah whined.

“Uh… How about this? You go grab a couple of dolls and meet me over by the couches,” Dean suggested.

Hannah’s face brightened infinitesimally. “Okay!” she exclaimed and ran up the stairs to grab whatever dolls she wanted to show him.

“It seems that you have won the attention of two of my children, Mr. Winchester,” Becky said as her eyes remained on the stairs that her daughter just sprinted up.

“Um, Mrs. Shurley, I don’t want you to think that I have any dishonorable intentions towards your son,” Dean started. “I have a lot of respect for him. He’s a great guy. I’d like to call him a friend if that’s okay with you.”

Becky leveled him with a glare whose only equal was Medusa’s. “Let me make myself perfectly clear, Mr. Winchester. My son has been through more bullshit than any person his age should have to go through. Nurses  **talk** , Dean. I know more than you think,” she growled. “I will not tolerate you  **ever** putting my son at risk or hurting him.”

“Mrs. Shurley, I…”

“I don’t believe I said I was done, Dean,” she hissed.

Dean swallowed hard. “Yes, ma’am.”

“I know you have feelings for him. It is beyond obvious that he has feelings for you. Anyone with eyes can see that,” Becky declared. She put both of her hands on her hips. “Now, you will treat my son like the angel and the warrior that he is without question. If I hear that you  **ever** hurt my boy, I will hurt you.”

_ Two life threats in one day… Two more and I break my record. _

“I can see what you're thinking, Dean. I won’t kill you. Death is too good for some people. Hurt my son, and I will make sure that you wish that you’d never been born,” she hissed.

Dean was shocked to find that a woman who was almost a foot shorter than him could make him feel like he was five inches tall. “I will never hurt him, Mrs. Shurley. I give you my word.”

“You’re lucky I’m giving you a shot, Dean. The fact that my son would not be alive if it were not for you is the only reason I am even considering trusting you,” she admitted.

“I… Ma’am, I didn’t do anything but punch Alastair. I hardly call that saving your son’s life,” Dean argued as he shook his head.

“Take credit where credit is due, Dean. Alastair is a monster. There is no stopping him, from what I can tell. Twice now, that demon has put my son in the hospital. Both times he got away with it. I only wish it had been me that broke his nose,” she confessed.

“Pfft, I wish I did more than break his nose. The things he’s done, he should be dead.”

“Death is too good for him. Death is mercy. He deserves agonizing pain,” Becky snarled.

“He’d only get off on it. That’s the kind of monster he is,” Dean divulged.

“Then a slow death it should be…” she paused. “You’ve seen  _ Deadpool _ , I presume.”

“Yeah! The movie was awesome… Um, why do you ask?”  _ Where the fuck did that come? _

“You remember how Francis brought out Wade’s mutant properties?”

“Yeah, that air pressure chamber thing. He kept suffocating him over and over again. Kept him right at the edge for a we…”

Becky was smirking at him.

“I like your style. Though a long weekend is too short a time for him.”

“Who said a long weekend. I never said for a long weekend. I said a slow death. I’d keep him right at the edge until his heart gives out,” she explained with a shrug.

“You’re one twisted sister,” Dean commented with admiration.

She shot him a bitch face. “You’ll understand when you have kids, Dean.”

“It’s Cas. I don’t need to have kids before I understand why you want him to suffer, Mrs. Shurley.”

Mrs. Shurley gave him a once-over. “Call me, Becky.”

Dean shook his head in shock. “Um.. yeah… okay, Becky.”

She smiled and gave him a pat on the back. “I’m going to go look for my daughter. She’s taking too long. That usually means trouble.”

“I bet,” Dean chuckled.

They parted ways, and Dean went to join the other party guests in the living room. “What’s going on over here.”

“Well, we’re trying to decide what game to play,” Jo answered.

“It’s a toss between Life and Monopoly,” Charlie added.

Sam pouted. “I still stand by my argument that people lose friends when they play Monopoly.”

Meg rolled her eyes. “We heard you the first five times, Moose.”

“I like Life. I promise I won’t try to sell the children,” Dean said for Charlie’s benefit.

She chortled. “Okay, Anyanca.”

Cas joined in on the laughter. “I actually got that reference.”

“Well, looks like Life it is!” Jo announced.

“Burgers!” Chuck yelled.

 

>>>>>>

 

“Dude, the burger isn’t going anywhere,” Sam lectured.

Castiel smiled down at the juicy deliciousness of the burger in his hands. “These make me very happy.”

“Considering the close to pornographic sounds that have been coming out of your mouth since you started eating, we can all tell,” Charlie explained.

Castiel swallowed the bite of burger he was just chewing and looked at the faces of all of his friends. Dean’s, by far, was his favorite. His mouth was agape, and his eyes were wide. He had hardly touched his burger.

Apparently, Castiel wasn’t the only one who had noticed Dean wasn’t eating. “You feeling okay, Dean? Usually, you’re on burger two by now,” Sam said with obvious concern.

Dean cleared his throat. “Uh-hmm, uh, yeah, I um. I’m just really excited about dessert, man.”

“What’s for dessert?” Castiel asked as he took another bite of his burger.

“Well, we got a lot actually,” Charlie replied. “We have cupcakes, tarts, cookies, muffins, and pie.”

Castiel nodded his head. “Sounds delicious.”

“Yeah, the pie and muffins are from Briermere’s,” Jo noted.

Castiel paused before he took another bite of his burger. “Charlie, really? You went all the way out to Riverhead for my dessert? You didn’t have to do that.”

“I didn’t buy it,” Charlie admitted.

Castiel furrowed his eyebrows and tilted his head. “What?”

“Dean did. He asked what you like. So, I told him to get pie,” Jo explained.

“But… Briermere’s is my favorite pie. When someone is told to get someone pie, they go to Stop and Shop or Prestano’s, something nearby, not Briermere’s. That’s a forty minute drive!” Castiel exclaimed.

Dean blushed. “I asked what your favorite was. I wanted to get you something special… It’s peach cherry.”

_ If I wasn’t injured right now… _ Castiel cleared his throat.  _ Get off that train of thought right this instant. _ “Thank you, Dean. It is most certainly appreciated and very special. It is my favorite. You didn’t have to go out of your way like that.”

“I love pie. Trust me, knowing about this place now is a dream come true,” Dean admitted.

“It’s the best pie on the island,” Castiel stated.

“I look forward to trying it,” Dean smiled.

_ He is not making this easy for me… gets me a pie, gets along with my sister, polite, considerate, sexy as all fu… _

“Will you two stop eye fudging! I’m trying to eat!” Meg interjected.

Castiel could feel his face turn a bright crimson. He took another bite of his burger and stared at the ground as he chewed.

After everyone finished eating, they gathered around the coffee table once more to start playing Life. Hannah eventually joined them with a book bag filled with her dolls and clothing. Between every single one of Dean’s turns, she would go back to rambling on about something with her dolls. Dean was beyond patient with her. Castiel himself would have told Hannah to play in her room or with her dollhouse after the first half hour. Dean, however, spent over an hour, in between turns, playing with Hannah and her dolls until Becky told her it was time to go upstairs to get ready for bed. Dean had to carry her upstairs because she wanted to spend a little more time with him.

“He’s really good with her,” Charlie stated as she spun the wheel on the board.

“Dean has always been good with kids,” Sam said with a shrug. “He has a gift.”

“I think you have competition, Castiel,” Meg jested.

Sam scoffed. “Are you kidding me? His heart beats for only one person in this house. It’s not her.”

Castiel’s face flushed.  _ It’s mutual… _

“Look at him blush!” Meg teased.

“Shut up, Meg,” Charlie snarled.

“Look, Dean and I are only friends. That’s all. Please stop pushing!” Castiel snapped.

Every face in the room was slamming him with epic bitch faces.

“What!? It’s true!” Castiel protested.

“Yup, and I’m straight,” Charlie snarked.

Castiel leaned back on the couch and crossed his arms over his chest. “Fuck all of you.”

“We all understand your need to take a beat, Castiel. We do. Still, you’re kidding yourself if you think that you guys are friends. You’ll never be friends,” Charlie admonished. “Just accept it.”

“Whatever,” Castiel grumbled.

Dean joined them again just before his turn . Apologizing for having to carry Hannah upstairs. “She seems to like me,” he beamed.

“You’re a likable guy, man,” Sam smiled.

“Thanks, Sammy,” Dean grinned.

“Well, after this spin, Dean is going to be ready to retire. So, that only leaves Meg and Jo on the board,” Charlie informed the group. “What do you guys want to do next?”

“Movie?” Jo suggested.

“What movie?” Sam inquired.

Dean raised his hand. “I can recommend a few.”

Castiel handed the Roku remote to Dean. “Have at it.”

“Thanks!” Dean exclaimed. “Trusting me with the movie selection. That’s big.”

Castiel shrugged. “I honestly don’t have a preference, so your choice is better than mine.”

Dean laughed. “Well, I’m gonna count my money then make my selection.”

Everyone counted their earnings. Jo won. Sam was second. Castiel was third. Dean and Charlie tied for fourth. Meg, much to her chagrin, came in fifth. She then announced she was going to sit in vengeful silence for the next hour to plot her revenge against the winner. Which everyone, of course, found hilarious.

Dean, as promised, grabbed the remote after he was done and started to go through the movies available on VUDU. “Dude,  _ Fifth Element _ ! We gotta watch this one!”

“I’m green,” Charlie replied. “Everyone else?”

“Super green,” Sam responded in a squeaky voice.

Castiel couldn’t understand what was so funny about the color green, but evidently, it was hilarious considering how hard the rest of the group was laughing. “Why is the color green funny?”

“You’ve seriously never watched this movie, Cas?” Dean questioned with a baffled expression.

Charlie threw her hands up. “He is movie illiterate. I’ve tried. I tap out. It’s your turn, man.”

“Seriously, I speak in movie and TV quotes, Cas. You will not understand a ton of shit I say unless you start watching movies,” Dean explained. He raised an eyebrow at Castiel. “You know what, that’s gonna be our homeschool project for you. We’re watching movies.”

Castiel furrowed his eyebrows. “Why do I have no say in this?”

Dean huffed out an exasperated breath. “ ‘ Cause, you need a movie education, and I will be your teacher.”

“You like being his teacher, huh? That’s kinky,” Meg noted with a suggestive smile.

Charlie punched Meg’s arm. “Mind out of the gutter, Meg,” she chastised. “I’m with Dean on this. It’s about time you start watching movies.”

Castiel shook his head. “Fine. Put the movie on. Let’s begin the lesson.”

Castiel had to admit the movie wasn’t half bad. Especially when the Diva started to sing in the opera house. “Her range is incredible!” Castiel exclaimed.

“What about that fight scene? Pretty badass, am I right?” Dean inquired.

“I always thought that fight scene was sexy as fuck,” Charlie admitted.

Jo glared at Charlie in response.

Charlie gave Jo a bitch face. “Jo, really? My heart has belonged to you since forever, and you think that a fight scene with Milla Jovovich is going to change that? You’re sexier than ten Milla’s.”

Jo beamed. “Glad to hear it,” she said , then kissed Charlie on the cheek.

When the movie ended, it was around nine. Since it was a school night, the three ladies in the room called their parents to arrange for them to be picked up. Jo and Meg were the first to go after they helped divvy up the leftovers as Becky asked. Sam and Dean spent time cleaning up the decoration while Charlie finished reorganizing the kitchen and wiping it down. By the time Sam and Dean had finished with the decorations, Charlie was done with the kitchen and brought out the pie.

“Oh, fuck yes!” Dean exclaimed.

Sam shrugged at Charlie and Castiel. “He loves pie.”

Dean punched Sam in the arm. “I didn’t want to try any of the pie I bought for myself until I tried this one. I’m fucking ready to have me some pie, bitch!”

Sam rubbed his arm. “Jerk.”

Charlie’s eyes shot to the ceiling. She mouthed the word “ **_Wow_ ** ” then put the plates, pie box, forks, and pie cutter on the coffee table. She sat down at one of the chairs and flung open the box. “How big of a slice do you want, Castiel?”

“An eighth, please,” he smiled.

“Sam?” she asked as she cut into the pie.

“Not a big piece. A little smaller than Castiel,” he answered.

“Dean?”

“Um… I’ll take the same size as Cas,” he replied.

Sam cocked an eyebrow. “Really?”

Dean elbowed Sam. “Shut up!”

Castiel pointed to the two brothers. “Is the violence truly necessary?”

Sam barked out a laugh. “This is nothing,” Sam said as he sat down on the couch. He lifted up his shirt. He pointed to a scar on his ribs. “This one happened when I hit the corner of one of the end tables at home while we were fighting over the remote.”

“Yeah,” Dean chuckled. “What he’s failing to mention is that when he won, he threw one of the other remotes at me and slashed my head open.” He crouched down in front of Castiel then parted his hair near the hairline to reveal a scar.

“Yeah, but I’m the one who needed stitches, jerk!” Sam grimaced.

“Alright, let’s stop exchanging battle scars and eat some pie instead,” Charlie interrupted.

Castiel smiled around his first bite.  _ Mmm, I love this pie. _

Dean was moaning. If Castiel’s moans were close to pornographic when he was eating his burger, Dean’s were hardcore gay porn. “Oh, my fucking God!” Dean groaned. “This is un-fucking-believable!”

Castiel had to shift in his seat from the new level of uncomfortable his pants were causing him.  _ Don’t think about sex. Don’t think about sex. _

Dean made another guttural moan.

_ DON’T THINK ABOUT SEX! _ He scowled at Dean.  _ Bastard wants to kill me… _

“Dean, it’s just pie,” Charlie commented with a sour face. “You’re turning me off of my food, dude.”

“No. This is not just pie. This is… The crust is flaky yet moist at the same time. The filling isn’t liquidy or overpoweringly sweet. Its tart and tangy. I’ve died and gone to pie heaven!” Dean beamed. There were flakes of crust peppering his lips.

“Bobby was right,” Sam started. “You’re going to be four hundred pounds.”

“Yeah, but I’ll die happy,” Dean grinned as he took another bite of pie. Well, more shoveled half the piece in his mouth than took a bite.

_ How does he fit that much in his mouth? _

“Anyway,” Charlie began as she put her plate of pie on the table, “I’m done.”

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed. “But, you’re not done.”

“You may enjoy the sound of Dean’s wanton moans, but it’s making me sick,” she admitted. “Plus, my mom should be here any minute, so…”

“Mind if I finish your piece, Charlie?” Dean asked.

Charlie shrugged. “Have at it.”

Dean rubbed his hands together and snatched the pie off of the table.

Castiel cocked an eyebrow as he watched Dean nearly swallow Charlie’s unfinished piece whole.  _ Wow… _

Charlie checked her phone. “Just got the text. She’s here.”

Castiel made a move to stand up.

She hugged him from the side. “Don’t you dare try to get up.”

“Thank you, again, Charlie,” Castiel said as he hugged her awkwardly back.

Charlie smiled at Castiel as she pulled away then shrugged. “Hey, what are besties for?”

“We should probably get going, too, Dean,” Sam added as Charlie stood up.

The utter look of betrayal on Dean’s face was priceless. “Sam! Pie!”

“Yes, I know pie, but I have school tomorrow and so do you,” Sam responded.

Sam and Dean had a staring match that ended with Sam winning the silent argument. “Fine!” Dean snapped.

Sam closed the pie box and took it to the kitchen while Dean cleared the table.

Dean made a motion to take Castiel’s empty plate from his hands. “You done, Cas?”

“Yes. Thank you, Dean.”

Dean smiled sweetly down at him as he took the plate. “No problem.”

“I’m off,” Charlie announced from the stairs. “See you soon, Castiel!”

“So long, Charlie!” Castiel hollered after her.

Charlie waved goodbye to everyone and disappeared up the stairs.

Sam exited the kitchen followed closely by Dean. “We’re going to be leaving now, too, Castiel,” Sam informed him.

“Okay,” Castiel winced as he started to push himself off the couch for the first time since he got back to his house.

Dean darted across the room to help him. “Cas…”

“I got it,” Castiel promised.

“Still, you shouldn’t exert yourself,” Dean chastised. He took one of Castiel’s arms and wrapped it around his neck. “Let me help you, please.”

_ Mmmm… He smells good.  _ “Thank you, Dean,” Castiel smiled.

Dean smirked back at him. “Anytime, Cas.”

Sam was standing in front of the two of them; face screwed up with mild revulsion. “Anyway… Later, Castiel,” Sam said with a slight nod of his head. “I’ll meet you outside, Dean.”

“Bye, Sam!” Castiel yelled after him.

Dean held Castiel close to him, not letting him go even though Castiel was already safely on his feet. “Do you need help doing anything else?”

Castiel chuckled. “I’ll be okay, Dean. Thank you,” he grinned as he turned his head to look at Dean.

Their faces were a mere four inches apart. Dean took in a stuttered breath as he looked from Castiel’s eyes to his lips. His lips glistened as he wet his own.

Castiel couldn’t help but watch Dean as he did so. The temptation to steal a kiss was close to overpowering. All he had to do was lean in, and he was sure Dean would follow.

Dean, for some odd reason, was stronger than the two of them and stepped away from him. “I’m sorry, Castiel. I shouldn’t be doing things like that. You’ve asked me not to on more than one occasion.”

Castiel sighed. “Do you hear me complaining right now?”

“No, but that’s the problem. You need time. I’m robbing you of it by being greedy,” Dean mumbled as he put his hands in his front pockets.

Castiel took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He shook his head and released a bittersweet chuckle. “We’re hopeless,” he stated as he looked back into Dean’s eyes.

Dean nodded as he pursed his lips. “Yup. No argument there.” Dean leaned in and gave Castiel a gentle kiss on the cheek.

Castiel’s eyes fluttered closed. He felt a shiver run through him as the electricity spread from where Dean’s lips touched his cheek.

Castiel felt Dean’s breath on his ear as he whispered. “Goodnight, Cas. Sleep well.”

“Mmm-hmm,” he breathed as he opened his eyes. Only to be met with Dean’s bright smiling eyes. “You, too.”

Dean’s face flushed as he smirked. “Later, Cas.”

“Goodbye, Dean.”

When Castiel heard the front door close, he let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding. His mom appeared at the bottom of the stairs with a gentle smile gracing her sweet face. “Who’s ready for bed?”

Castiel chuckled. “Me.”

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean left Cas’ with a smile that was almost painful it was so wide. Not even Sam’s final eye roll of the night could have ruined how incredible Dean’s day had been. They sat in relative silence during the short drive home. The only things he wanted to think about were those mesmerizing blue orbs watching him the entire day and the way they darkened when he said goodnight. Cas was just as bewitched by Dean as he was with Cas. Dean knew Sam was right. All he would need was a few weeks, maybe less, and Cas wouldn’t be able to control what was going on between them since the moment they had met.

_ I can’t wait until Tuesday. Disney movie and child aside, I’m seeing Cas again. _


	30. Chapter Thirty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 2000 hits and 100 kudos. I cannot describe how much I love every single one of you. Thank you so much for reading <3

Boredom did not even begin to cover what Castiel was feeling. He thought it would be great to be home again after the week-long stay in the hospital, but he was miserable. Most of his time was spent listening to music and reading. Every so often he would turn on his TV and then turn it off considering he had no idea what to watch or why he turned it on in the first place.

The hours that everyone was at school were the worst. After school on Monday, Charlie was initially supposed to go over to his house, but she had to cancel due to a school project. So, instead of spending time with his best friend, he spent a few more hours staring at the ceiling until his mom came home from work to check his bandages.

Luckily, he wasn’t completely alone. His father decided to work from home for the next two weeks, or until Castiel could do more than just go to the bathroom on his own. One of the benefits of being self-employed. Chuck’s partner, Marv, was willing to take over running most of the meetings. Unfortunately, some of the more involved meetings, like the one with their latest acquisition, Eric Kripke, had to be rescheduled. Still, Chuck promised Castiel that everything else could wait while he was on the mend. Even so, Chuck did spend an exorbitant amount of time in his office when Castiel didn’t need anything and Hannah wasn’t home.

Castiel didn’t want to be a burden, but the more time he spent alone, the more he felt like one. His mom was fussing over him before she left for work that morning. Castiel had to swear to her at least fifteen times that he would call her if anything went wrong. He reminded her that he was not alone in the house, but apparently, that didn’t mean anything. Gabriel was just as bad. He came in spouting advise and using medical terminology to the point that Castiel only understood every other sentence. Regardless of how lonely he felt, he didn’t want to listen to Gabriel’s ranting on top of his mother’s. Castiel begged him to leave his room. Eventually, he no longer had to beg for him to go. Gabriel was volunteering in the pediatric oncology department at Stony Brook Hospital and had to leave for his shift.  _ Those little ones need him more than me right now. _

Around eight, Castiel had given up on doing anything productive or entertaining. After reading the same paragraph for the last ten minutes, he decided to put the book down then turned off the playlist of Chopin concertos he had been listening to on his phone. Once he returned from another treacherous journey to the bathroom, he turned off the light in his room and laid down. He knew that within the hour, his mom would be home to check on his stitches and change his bandages, but for now, all he needed was the dark and silence.  _ Maybe I can get a quick fifteen-minute nap in, too, while I’m at it. _

His phone started to ring. With a sigh, he grabbed his phone and answered without bothering to look.  _ It’s probably my mom. _ “Hello?”

“ _ Hey, Cas. _ ”

Castiel shot up into a sitting position in his bed. “Fuck,” he hissed. He grabbed his stomach. A sharp pain had torn across his abdomen.  _ Big mistake sitting up that fast. I hope I didn’t pull anything! Friggin idiot. What the hell did you do that for? _

“ _ You okay, Cas?! _ ” Dean’s worried voice broke him out of his internal monologue.

“Yes, I’m fine,” Castiel answered with a wince. “Hello, Dean.”

“ _ Pfft… My ass you’re fine! What happened? _ ” Dean demanded.

Castiel exhaled a deep breath. “I sat up too quickly. I’ll be okay.”

“ _ Are you sure? Do you need anything? _ ”

Castiel chuckled softly. “Yes, Dean. I’ll be fine. No. I do not need anything. I’m sure my mother will be home soon to fuss over me a bit before I can go to bed.”

There was an awkward moment of silence. “ _ Well, if you need anything. _ ”

“I’ll be alright, Dean. I appreciate the concern,” Castiel said with a smile.

He could hear Dean’s reciprocating smile through the phone. “ _ Of course, Cas. _ ”

“So, is there a reason for this call?” Castiel inquired, the smile never leaving his face.

“ _ Besides making you pull some stitches, you mean? _ ”

Castiel barked out a laugh. “Yes, besides that.”

“ _ Well, I wanted to see how you’re doing. I just finished class not too long ago, and I was thinking about you… kind of all day and I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. Are you okay? _ ”

He could picture Dean rubbing the back of his neck nervously in his mind. He couldn’t help it when his grin widened. “Yes, Dean. I am okay. As I have said, many times. Now, how are you? Are you okay?”

Dean’s breathy chuckle came through the phone. “ _ Yeah, Cas. I’m okay. _ ”

His smile grew infinitesimally wider.  _ You’re such a sap… Stop smiling like an idiot! _ “Okay. Anything else?”

“ _ Munchies. _ ”

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed. “Munchies?”

“ _ Well, I’m coming over tomorrow for movies and stuff. I can bring food and shit _ .”

“I certainly hope you do not bring shit with you.”

“ _ Cas, seriously? _ ”

Castiel snickered. “Of course, not seriously.”

“ _ You’re such a weirdo, _ ” Dean laughed.

“In answer to your question, I still have an overabundance of what you call ‘munchies’ here. Charlie divvied out most of the food that was at the party. However, chips, pretzels, and such, did not make the list of things that would leave my party along with its guests.”

“ _ Well, if you want, tomorrow I can unburden you of those items, _ ” Dean offered.

“That would be greatly appreciated. There is no earthly way we would have been able to eat all of it,” Castiel admitted.

“ _ Do you want me to grab some burgers or anything? _ ” Dean added.

Castiel grinned. “Well, if you’re going to bring burgers with you, I feel I must inform you I have some pie left over.”

“ _ Are you saying that you think I am only getting you a burger to hear the titillating sounds you utter when you eat them? _ ”

“Pfft… Why would you think that? I only mentioned the pie because, well, you see I have so much leftover food. Seeing as you liked the pie so much, I thought I should let you know,” Castiel beamed.  _ Also, yes, I want to hear you moan…  _ Castiel shook his head.  _ “I just want to be friends, Dean.” Complete and utter bullshit… _

“ _ Uh-huh… Sure, Cas. _ ” Castiel could almost hear the smirk. “ _ What time should I get there? _ ”

“I don’t know. Hannah gets home around 3:30. So, around then would work.”

“ _ Okay. Three it is. _ ”

“Is that all, Dean?”

There was a long pause before Dean answered. “ _ Yeah, I guess. _ ”

“Okay.”

“ _ Okay. _ ”

_ He’s adorable… CHRIST STOP IT!!! Friends, remember? Friends!  _ “Goodnight, Dean.”

“ _ Night, Cas, _ ” Dean breathed, sounding almost disappointed.

“Goodnight.” Castiel went to move the phone away from his ear.

“ _ Wait, Cas, _ ” Dean blurted out.

“Yes?”

“ _ I can’t wait to see you tomorrow. I know you don’t want me to say shit like that. I know I shouldn’t say it, but it’s true. So, yeah… _ ”

Castiel smiled crookedly through the phone. “I look forward to seeing you tomorrow as well, Dean.”

“ _ Really? _ ”

Castiel chuckled. “Yes, really.”

“ _ Okay! Well, later, Cas! _ ”

“Goodnight, Dean.”

Castiel waited to hear the sound of the call being ended before he removed the cell phone away from his face. He smiled down at the screen that was still displaying Dean’s name. Considering how miserable he had felt the entire day, his night indeed was a severe improvement.

 

>>>>>>

 

Monday was a blur. Dean spent most of the day thinking about Tuesday. Things had gone so well at the party. Castiel’s little sister, Hannah, warranted the biggest hug the world had ever seen. He knew Castiel eventually would have asked him over, but that little girl basically nipped the whole song and dance in the bud.  _ Maybe I should get her something as a thank you. _

After he got off of the phone with Castiel, his spirits soared even higher. He didn’t know it was possible, but a short five-minute conversation made him even more excited about the next day. He was still on the fence about picking up burgers, but he was pretty sure that it would be a good idea.  _ Worst case scenario I can run out and get burgers for us. Or there is always Ubereats… _

The next day at the high school, Dean had a smile that had taken permanent residence on his face. Rufus told him several times, “Get away from me, kid. Your smile is freaking me out.”

Every time, Dean would respond with, “Awww, come on, Rufus. You should try smiling too sometimes. It’s good for you!”

He would either receive a grunt or a scoff. One or the other. Neither one did anything to sour his mood.

Ellen and Mick didn’t say anything about his pleasant demeanor. If anything it was contagious, so they were just as happy as he was without knowing why.  _ Maybe that’s why it bothers Rufus. He’s just permanently ornery. _

Between the fifth and sixth period, Charlie even greeted him. “Hey, Winchester! How’s it going?”

He was in such a state of shock he didn’t remember how to use his mouth until she had cleared her throat. “Sorry! Hey! I’m great! How are you?”

She shrugged. “Eh, can’t complain. I miss having my bestie with me at lunch, but I always have Meg and Sam to keep me company. Gym has been  **hell** , let me tell you. Coach Adler is making us swim! Ugh,” she groaned with derision. “It is the worst semester of my life.”

Dean chuckled. “Wait until you get to college, then you can tell me what a bad semester is.”

She mumbled what he just said in a mocking tone and then punched him in the arm. “Let me have my moment of self-pity, will ya!? You don’t have to rub the whole ‘I haven’t been in the college world yet,’ in my face.”

Dean rubbed his arm. “Geez, you punch like Jo.”

“No, she punches like me,” she beamed.

“You two are adorable,” Dean admitted with sincerity.

Charlie turned a bright shade of crimson. “Shut up,” she muttered.

“It’s a compliment! Take it,” he chuckled.

She punched him in the arm again. “Quit it, Winchester.”

“What did he do?” Sam asked as he approached the two of them.

“I said her and Jo are adorable. She punched me,” Dean explained.

Sam’s eyebrows furrowed. “That’s a bad thing?”

“Apparently,” Dean replied with a shrug. “Anyway, I got stuff to do, so I will see you two later,” he excused himself from their company with a wave and made his way down the hallway toward the auditorium.

Since the start of his school year, the auditorium had become his center of solace. He didn’t always go in there and turn on the spotlights. Sometimes he merely appreciated the silence the large room held. The only time he couldn’t go in the auditorium was during the fifth period. The mixed choir had all rights and privileges during that period. Luckily, sixth period, his free period, he didn’t have to worry about anyone invading his privacy.

“Well, hello, Dean.”

Obviously, that held true until now.

“What are you doing in here, Al?”

“How’s your boy?” Alastair asked, ignoring Dean’s previous question. “Healing up nicely, I suspect.”

_ God, I want to rip this asshole to shreds!  _ “I don’t see how that is any of your business. Considering you’re the reason why he is injured in the first place.”

“I can’t inquire as to how a dear old classmate of mine is doing?” Alastair asked with a hand over his heart, feigning offense.

Dean glared at Alastair. “What do you want, Al? That’s why you’re in here, isn’t it? You want something from me?”

“Well, you see, Dean, I am utterly disappointed that we didn’t get a chance to spend some quality time together on Thursday,” he explained as he slowly approached Dean. “I was under the impression that you wanted something from me, is that no longer the case?”

_ Is this dick serious?  _ “I think I made myself abundantly clear on Thursday that I have no interest in you or your cousin.”

“Hmm, well, you see, Lily doesn’t like the way you treated her. To be perfectly honest, Dean, neither do I,” Alastair hissed.

“I couldn’t care less what the hell you think or want, Al.”

“Really? Hmm… You know, that little case you made to me over a month ago about you having dirt on me. Well, that goes both ways. You do realize that, right?”

Dean swallowed hard. “You’re bluffing,” he said smoothly, trying to mask his terror.

Alastair chuckled as a wicked grin spread across his face. “I could be. However, you know, I’m probably not.”

“Al, what do you want?” Dean muttered.

“After everything that happened that Saturday, I was still willing to play nice. I figured after your little faggot’s outburst you would come crawling back to us. Then, what do you know, Thursday comes along, and I get a phone call from my absolutely elated cousin that our Dean was back. Obviously, that changed for some random reason. I’m assuming your dear little fairy has something to do with that. Am I right?” Al asked as he snarled at Dean. There was a certain level of rage in his tone that was both irritating and intimidating.

“His name is Castiel, Al. Not faggot. Not fairy. It’s Castiel,” Dean growled.

“So, lover boy took you back.”

Dean balled his fists.  _ School property, Dean. You’re on school property. He’s doing this on purpose. Just walk away. _

“I’m going to take your lack of answer as a yes,” Alastair stated through gritted teeth. He shook his head. “Why do you lower yourself? You had such promise. You had fun with us this summer. I know you did. Why waste your time with him when you could be doing what you do best with me?”

“Al, I’m not doing this here. Leave me and Cas alone.”

Alastair tsked. “If only I could, Dean. If only I could.”

Dean furrowed his eyebrows. “What the hell does that mean?”

“You pissed me off and disappointed me, Dean. Not to mention, you hurt my dear cousin’s feelings and broke my nose. I do not abide that kind of behavior. Punishment is necessary.”

Dean's nostrils flared, he was livid. “Are you threatening me?”

Alastair chuckled maliciously. “As your dear brother, Sam, said to me, ‘it’s not a threat, it’s a promise,’ Dean,” he sneered. Alastair grabbed his cell phone out of his back pocket. The light from the screen lit up his snake-like features. “Well, I have things to attend to. Always a pleasure, Dean.” He turned away and made his way towards the auditorium doors that led to the art corridor. “Send my regards to Castiel,” he said without turning to face Dean. When he finally met the door to leave, he grabbed the handle. “He’ll definitely be hearing from me.”

“Stay away from him!” Dean barked.

“Oh, Dean,” Alastair chuckled as he shook his head. He smirked at Dean as he opened the door. “That was never going to happen,” he warned, then slammed the door behind him.

Dean could feel his face flush with unabashed fury. His heart was racing, and his breathing became erratic. He had no idea what to do with the knowledge of Alastair’s intentions. Part of him wanted to keep it to himself. However, after what happened last time, he knew keeping this to himself would not end well.  _ If you warned the others previous time, he would have never been in the hospital. He would be here, right now, with me. _

After pacing the backstage for five minutes, he made his decision. He took out his cell phone.

**Dean: Bring Charlie with you to the auditorium. Now!**

**Dean: Bring Meg, too.**

Within a matter of three minutes, all three of them showed up.

“Dean?” Sam called.

Dean approached the edge of the stage and was met with three varying levels of bemused expressions.

Meg, of course, was the first to speak. “Care to explain why I just had to ditch some perfectly horrible pizza?”

“Is everything okay?” Charlie followed.

“Last time he said something I kept my mouth shut. I’m not doing that again,” Dean declared.

“Are you gonna elaborate on that?” Meg inquired, her standard level of irritation intact.

“Alastair promised me that he’s going to finish the job he started at your party.”


	31. Chapter Thirty-One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are Moana spoilers in here. If you have not seen the movie, I suggest you do. Makes me cry everytime I watch it.

Three o'clock on Tuesday could not come fast enough. If Castiel had the ability to pace the floor, that would be precisely what he would have been doing. Instead, he tried to do the same thing that he had been doing for the better part of the day before, read and listen to music. However, every time he tried to do anything other than think about seeing Dean, he failed miserably.

When he knew that the final bell had rung at the high school, he texted Dean to tell him that he should come through the back. Castiel still had a hard time with stairs, and he knew that he wouldn’t have to climb any if Dean went to the back door rather than the front. Also, his father was reasonably busy with work-related duties; he didn’t want to trouble him with door answering.

At around 2:45, Castiel received a text.

**Dean: Am I supposed to sit out here for the next fifteen minutes, or can I come in now?**

Castiel laughed out loud.

**Castiel: That excited to come to watch Moana, huh?**

**Dean: Well, I do enjoy a decent princess movie, so yeah.**

**Dean: Definitely has nothing to do with seeing you, at all. ;)**

Castiel shook his head.  _ This friendship is genuinely impossible. _

**Castiel: Head to the back. I’m heading to the door to let you in.**

His heart was racing.  _ Oh, God… Am I really about to spend almost an hour alone with him?  _ He took a few deep breaths to calm himself then gingerly got out of his bed. Once he felt steady on his feet, he approached the back door. He could see Dean’s shadow behind the curtain.  _ Breathe… just breathe. Everything will be okay. _

Words failed him when he saw Dean’s gorgeous face smiling at him. “Hey, Cas.”

“Hello, Dean,” he blushed.

“I like you in glasses. A lot,” Dean admitted.

Castiel touched the black frames as if he forgot they were on his face. “Yeah, I can’t be bothered with the process of contacts right now. Still, I feel like I look like a dweeb when I wear them.”

“Far from a dweeb. Trust me,” Dean swallowed.

Castiel watched Dean’s Adam's apple bob up and down on his neck. Dean’s jaw clenched, accenting the sharp angles of his face.  _ Sexy as fuck! _

Dean cleared his throat to get Castiel’s attention.

Castiel shook his head to clear it. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Not for nothing, Cas, but the last person who looked at me like that, I got laid,” Dean replied, flicking his eyebrows up quickly in a suggestive manner.

Castiel’s jaw dropped.  _ Don’t tempt me, Winchester. You have no idea how badly I want to throw my caution out the window. _

Dean licked his lips and then pursed them. “You gonna invite me in or am I standing out here for the duration of this visit?”

“Uh, yeah. Of course, come in,” Castiel said as he stepped to the side.

Dean smirked as he stepped into the first floor of Castiel’s house. “Thanks.”

Castiel closed the door and locked it behind him. “Mmm-hmm.”

“So, living room, I presume?”

“Yes, this way.”

They made the short journey down the hallway towards the living room. Castiel turned to tell Dean to take a seat when he noticed Dean was not behind him. He approached the hallway and saw Dean standing at the precipice of his bedroom door. “You have a record player?”

“No. Why?”

Dean entered the room without permission.

_ Oh, God, he’s in my room. HE’S IN MY ROOM!  _ Castile quickly followed Dean.

Dean grabbed a random record off of one of Castiel’s shelves. “Well, for someone who doesn’t have a record player, you sure do have a lot of vinyls.”

“I inherited them,” Castiel explained. He shrugged. “Well, kind of. My Aunt Amara, she loves music, just as much as I do. Probably more. She gave me some of her duplicates.”

“No. Fucking. Way! You have  _ Coda, Zeppelin II,  _ and  _ Physical Graffiti _ ?” Dean asked his face lit up like a kid in a candy store. “Shit! Is that?” Dean inquired as he looked at a framed album on one of Castiel’s walls. “Is that a signed copy of  _ Abbey Road _ ?”

Castiel nodded in confirmation. “Yeah, my aunt Amara again. She actually knows Paul and Ringo.”

“Get the fuck out of here!?”

“No. She does. My aunt is in the music business. She lives in London. I only see her when she comes to the city on business. She’s always busy.”

Dean’s jaw dropped. “Does she know anyone from Zeppelin?”

A wide grin spread across Castiel’s face. “Yes.”

“Who?”

“All of them.”

“WHAT?!” Dean exclaimed. He almost jumped with excitement. “Why the hell did you not tell me that?!”

“It never came up. We merely discussed their music. I don’t mention this stuff at the drop of a hat.”

“You know I’m a huge Zeppelin fan. It should have been a given to mention that!”

“My apologies.”

“Have you met anyone else?” Dean asked as he continued to browse through Castiel record collection.

“Not many. I met Joan Jett, Tom Petty, Cyndi Lauper, Mandy Moore, Ed Sheeran, and David Bowie.”

Dean’s jaw dropped once again, only wider than before. “Shut the fuck up! You met Ziggy fucking Stardust?”

Castiel chuckled. “Yeah, he was a great guy.” His face sobered. “I was distraught when he passed. Him and Tom Petty,” Castiel bowed his head. “Two great musicians and people.”

Dean’s expression was somber. He nodded in agreement. “They really were.” They stood in silence for a moment or two. “Fuck, I am so jealous, Cas!”

Castiel smiled. “Well, you never know. Someday you may become famous and meet some of your idols.”

Dean scoffed. “Pfft, yeah, right. I’ll just fuck it up again.”

Castiel placed his hand softly on Dean’s shoulder. “Don’t sell yourself short, Dean. I’ve heard you play. You are inconceivably talented. You’ll most certainly get your chance again.”

“Maybe. Someday. Until then , I am not getting my hopes up.”

Castiel took back his hand. “You have a seriously low opinion of yourself. You are worth more than you even know. The world could use more people like you.”

“What? Fuck ups?”

“No. It has plenty of those. And again, you are not a fuck up. It needs more people who are willing to fight for what they believe in. It needs a few more heroes.”

“I’m no hero, Cas.”

“Might sound corny, but you’re mine. I’m living proof of your bravery,” Castiel smiled.

Dean’s face flushed. He cleared his throat. “Uh, Cas… I have to tell you something.”

Castiel’s face sobered.  _ Oh, God, what did he do? _

“I promised I would always be honest with you.”

_ Please, no… don’t tell me he slept with someone else since Sunday. _

“Alastair kind of cornered me in the auditorium today.”

“What about?”

“He promised me he was going to finish what he started when it comes to you.”

Castiel backed away from Dean until his knees met the edge of his bed and he was forced to sit down. “I see.”

“I won’t let anything happen to you,” Dean promised with an unwavering amount conviction.

“You can’t guarantee something like that, Dean,” Castiel muttered.

Dean sat down next to him. “No. I can’t. Still, I’d like to think that I can do my best at keeping you safe and out of harm's way. I already told Sam, Charlie, and Meg. I think you should tell your parents.”

Castiel shook his head. “That will do nothing but freak them out. I don’t want them to worry.”

“No offense, Cas. They should worry. I know the asshat personally. He doesn’t make idle threats. Usually, when he says something, he means it.”

Castiel turned to face Dean. “I think I know what he is capable of, Dean. He has done more than enough to me that I know he is probably not kidding.”

Dean’s bright emerald eyes were tainted with concern. He put his hand on Castiel’s. “I will not let him do anything to you again. If he wants to hurt you, he’s going to have to go through me first, okay?”

Castiel shook his head. “Don’t put yourself in danger for me. I’m not worth it.”

Dean huffed out a small breath. “Now, who has a low self-image? Trust me, Cas, you are beyond worth it.”

Castiel locked eyes with Dean. He saw nothing but faith, trust, and honesty in his eyes. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay. I trust you,” he said with a grin.

“Huh,” Dean uttered in mild surprise.

Castiel tilted his head in confusion “What?”

Dean shook his head. “Nothing.”

Castiel furrowed his eyebrows. “I don’t believe you.”

Dean shrugged. “It’s just being honest with you isn’t as hard as I thought it would be. Usually, it takes me forever to say how I really feel or what I mean. With you,” he shrugged again, “I don’t know, you’ve always been my exception for a lot of things.”

Castiel felt his face flush. “You flatter me, Dean.”

“It’s not flattery ; it’s a fact.”

Their eyes once again met. It took every ounce of control Castiel had not to lean in and steal a kiss from Dean. Castiel cleared his throat. “We should probably go to the living room and get things set up for when Hannah gets home.”

“Yeah, we should,” Dean agreed half-heartedly as his gaze traveled to Castiel’s lips.

_ Control yourself; please control yourself! _

Dean licked his lips.

_ Fuck it! _ Castiel leaned in.

“CASTIEL?!?!?! DEAN?!?!?!” Hannah’s little feet were hurtling down the steps towards them.

Dean chuckled. “Of course,” he said with a shake of his head.

Hannah came into the room, half out of breath, a wide grin was threatening to split her face in two. “Hello, Dean! Are you ready for  _ Moana _ !?!?”

“I sure am,” Dean replied. “We’ll meet you in there in a second, okay?”

“Okay!” she beamed and skipped into the other room.

Dean faced Castiel. “Cas…”

Castiel shook his head. “We shouldn’t, Dean. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t lead you on like that. I just… I can’t seem to… stop.”

Dean’s face sobered. “It’s okay, Cas.”

“No. It’s really not.”

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

Castiel pushed himself off of the bed.  _ It’s not fine. I want you. All the time. _ “Come on. We have a very excited little girl in the other room who has done nothing but talk about this for the past two days.”

“Yeah,” Dean nodded, refusing to meet Castiel’s eyes. “Let’s go.”

 

>>>>>>

 

It really was far from fine.  _ Fine really means fucked-up, insecure, neurotic, and emotional. Basically covers all of it right now… _ Even though he understood the reasoning behind Cas’ hesitancy, he didn’t know why he was bothering to fight what both of them wanted. It was almost as if Cas wanted to torture the both of them. Every second they spent alone with one another an invisible force was continually pulling them closer. There was only so long they could deny one another of what they truly wanted before they would explode.

Hannah was beyond excited to have Dean there. After her interruption, she was beyond thrilled to set them up. When Cas and Dean entered the living room, she had already brought the movie up. It was paused at the beginning and ready to play.

Cas smiled sweetly at his little sister. “Just a few more minutes, okay? I want to show Dean where all the snacks are.”

“Okay,” she beamed. “I’ll be right back. I wanted to show Dean what I made in school today.” She placed the remote on the table and darted up the stairs.

“She’s a little spitfire,” Dean mused.

Cas nodded.

“So, snacks?” Dean asked as he put his hands in his pockets, rocking softly on the balls of his feet.

“In the kitchen.”

When they entered the kitchen, Cas made a fruitless attempt to reach for a bowl on the second shelf of one of the cabinets. He gripped his stomach and hissed from the pain of the stretch.

Dean scowled. “You know, I’m right here, Cas? I am fully capable of helping you,” he insisted.

Cas banged his fist on the counter. “I hate this! I hate that I can’t do the simplest of tasks!”

Dean put a hand on Cas’ shoulder. “Hey, you’re not alone in all of this. You have people who care a lot about you. We’re all happy to help where we can.”

Cas shrugged Dean’s hand off of his shoulder. “It’s not the same, and you know it!”

Dean nodded his head minutely in understanding. “You’re right. It’s not the same, but we’re here nonetheless. So, point me in the direction of the things you want, and we’ll go and watch the movie that your sister is dying to introduce me to.”

Cas narrowed his eyes at Dean and started to point. “Bowls are there, chips and pretzels are there. If you want veggies and dip, they’re in the fridge. Leftover soda is in the corner over there. Cups… Well, we can use the rest of the solo cups next to the soda. I’ll take the ice, please.”

“Okay,” Dean rubbed his hands together as a sign that he was prepared for his task. “Go sit down. I’ll bring everything in there.”

Cas huffed out an exasperated sigh. “I can grab a bowl of two. I just can’t reach.”

“Cas,” Dean snarled. “Don’t argue with me. Go sit.”

Cas glared at Dean. “Assbutt,” he growled.

“Assbutt?”

“It felt right,” Cas explained with a shrug.

Dean barked out a laugh. “A little redundant, isn’t it? You realize you literally just called me a butt butt.”

Cas rolled his eyes. “Just grab the stuff and bring it into the living room. Hannah should be down any second with whatever she wants to show you.”

“Yes, sir,” Dean said with a salute.

“Good boy,” Cas smirked.

A chill traveled up Dean’s spine.  _ I liked that a little too much… _ He cleared his throat. “On it,” he croaked.

Cas chuckled suggestively as he bit his lower lip and left the room.

_ Smooth, Winchester. _

Dean got to work collecting everything he figured they would need. Luckily, he was able to locate a plate that was big enough to be considered a tray. He loaded everything onto it then carried it into the living room.

After he gently placed the tray on the coffee table, Dean sat down next to Cas. “Hannah’s still not down here? Is she okay?”

As if in answer to his question, Dean heard little feet making their way down the stairs towards them. “I’m back!” Hannah announced. “I had to go potty.” She ran over to the two of them and plopped herself in between the two of them. She held a drawing in her hand. “I made this in school today,” she said as she handed the drawing over to Dean.

It was a picture of what could only be described as slightly more detailed stick figures holding hands. Two boys and one little girl were smiling up at him from the paper. There were musical notes, flowers, a giant hook, and a funky looking stone at the little girl's feet. “Who are the people in the picture?”

“That’s me,” she began, pointing at the little girl. “That’s you,” she pointed at the stick figure with green dots for eyes. “And that’s Castiel,” she pointed at the final figure with the blue dots for eyes. “It’s us watching  _ Moana _ together!” she smiled brightly up at Dean.

“That’s a great picture you drew there,” he shot her a crooked smile then passed it back to her. “Thank you for sharing that with me.”

Her eyebrows furrowed. “No. You keep it. I drew it for you.”

Dean pointed a hand at himself. “For me?” he asked, baffled at the little girl's kindness.

Her smile brightened to the strength of a supernova. “Of course, silly,” she said as she shook her head. “I wants you to have it,” she stated, her little hand grabbing his forearm as she used it to lift herself to a standing position on the couch.

“Thank you, Hannah,” he said as he hugged her. “It’s going on my wall when I get home.”

She pushed him back and hit him once again with her megawatt smile. “Really?”

“Of course, sweetheart! Thank you,” he hugged her again. Dean’s gaze fell on Cas. The look in Cas’ eyes was one of awe and bemusement. Dean smiled at him and shrugged.

Cas laughed. “Alright, you two, are we watching this movie or what?”

Hannah broke away from Dean and sat back down on the couch, bouncing in her seat. “ _ MOANA _ !!!!” she exclaimed.

Cas and Dean snickered.

“Alright,” Dean started with a clap of his hands, “Let’s do this!”

Hannah was right, to say the least. Cas did have a pretty voice. Beautiful was more accurate. He had an extensive range. He wasn’t a tenor by any stretch of the word. He was more of a baritone, but he could reach notes that many singers wish they could reach.  _ Fuck… he just got that much hotter! _ Cas knew every word to every song. He made silly faces at all of the right parts. It was evident that Cas usually did dance with Hannah. More than once, Hannah attempted to grab Cas’ hand and get him to stand up and dance with her. Cas would shift uncomfortably in his seat then shake his head. Both of them were clearly disappointed by his lack of mobility. Hannah would pout, but fortunately, she understood. Her gaze would fall to his stomach as her frown deepened. Cas and Hannah shared disappointed expressions every time, but eventually, they would go back to a limited performance of their normal routine.  _ Cas enjoys doing this with her.  _ It hurt to see both of their pained expressions. Especially during Maui’s song , “You’re Welcome.” Cas obviously knew the entire dance routine for it. Instead of enacting them, due to his injuries, he only moved his arms around to some of the moves.  _ Alastair has no idea how much pain he has caused. Not just to Cas, but his family, his little sister… _

Dean couldn’t help the stray tears that fell a few times throughout the movie.  _ Fucking Disney movies. _ Every time he would fruitlessly try to hide them, but he knew that Cas saw it every time he did. Cas would smile coyly down at his knotted fingers , then look back at the screen.

Hannah caught it only once. She grabbed his hand, laced their fingers together, and said, “It’s okay, Dean. Don’t worry . S he never really leaves her. She’s the stingray. She’s always there. Always watching. Isn’t that right, Castiel? That’s what mommy says. When someone dies , they stay close to the people who loves them.”

Dean looked down at the concerned child’s face. Those words had hit him way too close to home. It took every ounce of emotional control to keep himself from really crying. “I know, Hannah. This just reminds me of my mom. That’s all,” he explained as he softly squeezed her hand.

A deep frown covered Hannah’s ordinarily bright face. “Your mommy is in heaven?”

Dean nodded with a mournful expression.

“I’m sorry, Dean. No one should lose their mommy.”

“It was a long time ago.”

“Doesn’t mean you can’t be sad.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “How does a kindergartener know this much?”

There was a tap on his shoulder. Cas’ eyes were marred by sorrow. “We lost our grandpa almost two years ago, my mom… Well, they were really close. Grandpa Akobel, he meant a lot to all of us. We had to explain to Hannah what all of it means.”

Dean nodded with understanding. He looked down at Hannah. “It’s never easy losing anyone, Hannah. But you’re right . T hey’re always in your heart.”

She nodded. “I know.”

Nothing else was said on the subject, which he was incredibly grateful for. Dean continued to sit back and enjoy the show that was Cas and Hannah.

When the credits began to roll on the screen, it was almost six, and Dean’s stomach started to growl.

Hannah giggled from what seemed to be her now permanent position at his side. Her arms wrapped around him. “I think Dean’s hungry. His tummy just said hello.”

Castiel chuckled. “I think so,” he agreed.

“I can run out and get some food for us if you want,” Dean offered hesitantly.  _ Ugh, I really don’t want to go out. _

Castiel shook his head. “That shouldn’t be necessary. Hannah?”

She looked up at him expectantly. “Uh-huh?”

“Why don’t you go upstairs and see what Dad made you for dinner?”

She scowled and wrapped her arms around Dean a little tighter. “I don’t want to go upstairs.”

“Hannah,” Cas admonished, “Dad probably made you dinner. You should go upstairs.”

“But…”

“Hey, you crazy kids! How was the movie?” Gabriel asked as he entered the room, a glowering caramel skinned goddess closely following him.

_ Watch it, Winchester! Cas is worth more than a billion of whoever this chick is. _

“Hello, Gabriel. Good evening, Kali,” Castiel said with a vacant expression. “How are you this evening?”

The question was obviously addressed to Kali, but Gabriel is the one who answered. “Fabulous ! W e’re just stopping here quickly before we go to Lombardi’s. Want anything while I’m there?”

“A cannoli,” Dean answered. “Leave the gun though. I won’t need that,” he chuckled.

The girl Cas called Kali rolled her eyes. Gabriel smiled. “Okay, Clemenza. I’ll be sure to do that after Paulie is dead.”

“Hey!” Dean exclaimed with a bright smile. “You got it!”

“I don’t understand that reference,” Castiel voiced with a perplexed expression.

Dean’s jaw dropped as his eyes widened in shock. “You’ve never seen _The_ _Godfather_!?”

Cas’ did his standard head tilt. “ _ The Godfather _ ?”

Dean faced Gabriel, his hand splayed out to him with an expression of “ ** _What the fuck?_** _!_ ”

“Don’t look at me,” Gabriel said with a shrug. “I have nothing to do with that mishegoss. Sometimes I can’t believe we’re from the same gene pool.”

“Gabriel, we have places to be. Is this display vital?” Kali snapped.

Dean cocked an eyebrow.  _ What a bitch! _

“Sorry, sugar cake,” Gabriel apologized with all sincerity. He entered his room and exited quickly with whatever he had come for. “Well, good night, you three.”

“Goodnight, Gabriel!” Hannah yelled.

“Goodnight,” he smiled back at Hannah.

Kali nodded tersely at Dean, Cas, and Hannah.

When they were gone, Dean turned to Cas. “Wow ! S he’s a breath of fresh air.”

“You have no idea,” Castiel stated as he lifted himself off of the couch. “I have to use the restroom.”

Hannah looked up at Dean. “I don’t like her. She’s scary.”

“Yeah, she doesn’t seem like the friendliest of people,” Dean concurred with a nod.

“I like you more. You’re nice.”

Dean leaned into Hannah. “Can I tell you a secret?”

She nodded adamantly.

“I like you more, too.”

She smiled and hugged his side again. “I’m happy that you’re Castiel’s boyfriend.”

Dean’s face fell. “Um, Hannah, I’m… Well, I’m not Castiel’s boyfriend.”

She pouted. “Why?”

“Because he doesn’t want me to be,” Dean explained, trying and failing to hide his vexation on the matter.

“Why?”

“It’s complicated.”

“Why? Do you not like my brother?” she asked. She separated from him and hopped onto the floor. She glared at him with her hands on her hips.

He shook his head. “The exact opposite, sweetheart. I like him very much.”

“Then why aren’t you his boyfriend?” she demanded with irritation.

“Why does it matter to you if he has a boyfriend or not? Do you have a boyfriend?”

She blushed. “No…”

Dean smiled. “No?”

“No,” she said, this time with conviction.

“If you say so,” Dean chuckled.

“Hannah, have you gone upstairs to Dad yet and asked him about your dinner?” Cas inquired as he entered the living room.

“No,” she grimaced.

“Hop to it, missy,” Cas ordered.

They had a quick staring match before Hannah conceded and groaned, “Ugh, fine.” She gave Dean another hug. “Night, Dean! Thank you for watching  _ Moana _ with me.”

“Anytime,” Dean promised with a smile.

“Hannah?”

“Ugh,” she whined. “I’m going.” She hugged Castiel’s leg then stomped up the stairs.

Dean grinned. “She’s adorable.”

Castiel shrugged. “She can be.”

“So, dinner?”

“I was thinking Chinese.”

_ Ugh, I really don’t want to go out. _ “I can swing by Dim Sum, I guess.”

“I was thinking New Ming. They deliver.”

Dean scowled in disgust. “They suck.”

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I don’t want you to have to waste the gas going out just to come back. Do you?” Cas asked as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Oh, God, I do not want to have to go out,” Dean sighed in relief from Cas’ understanding.

Cas smiled. “Then it’s settled. New  M ing.”

After they ordered and Dean won the battle over who was paying for the food, Dean was paying; they made themselves comfortable once again on the couch. “So, Hannah thought I was your boyfriend.”

Cas’ face turned a bright crimson. “She did?”

“Uh-huh,” Dean smirked. “She was very upset that we’re not boyfriends, just F.Y.I.”

Dean didn’t think it was possible, but Cas’ face blushed a little harder with that bit of information. “She likes you,” Cas stated.

“Yes, she told me.”

Cas fiddled with his fingers. “You’re very good with her. Not everyone is okay with spending the amount of time you spent with her today. I think a lot of people consider it an inconvenience , me having a little sister. Only Charlie really gets her. Meg, well, you’ve met her. She’s not people friendly, let alone, kid-friendly.”

Dean snorted. “That’s an accurate observation.”

“I hardly see Anna unless we’re at school. Her parents are insanely strict, but I think she would be willing to spend time with Hannah if she had the ability to come over.”

“Yeah, I saw Anna today. She seems lonely without you.”

Cas smiled. “We’ve been what she calls ‘band buddies’ for a very long time,” Cas explained, he made air quotes when he said “band buddies.”

“That’s adorable,” Dean mentioned then internally smacked himself for not using a filter.

Cas’ head tilted. He narrowed his eyes at Dean. “What is?”

Dean cleared his throat. “You actually make the air quotes. They’re already implied, but you make them. It’s, uh… It’s cute,” Dean stammered.

Cas chuckled. “My cousin, Balthazar, made the same comment the last time we skyped with one another.”

“You have a cousin named Balthazar?”  _ What a name! _

“Yes. He lives in London. He’s attending UCL. Majoring in English literature. I think he plans to work with my father in publishing.”

“UCL… University College of London? Isn’t that one of the top ten colleges in the world?”

Cas nodded. “The last I checked it was number six.”

_ Fuck! _ “He must be brilliant.”

“He certainly thinks so,” Cas said with a smile. “My cousin, Balthazar, has a very high opinion of himself. As do I. He is not only family. He is one of my closest friends. I miss him.”

“When do you get to see him next?”

“Thanksgiving,” Chuck answered for Cas.

_ Shit, is he a friggin ninja? _ _! _ _  I didn’t even hear him enter the room.  _ Dean shot up. “Good evening, Mr. Shurley,” Dean greeted, he offered Chuck his hand.

“I’m fairly certain I told you to call me Chuck,” he reminded Dean as he took Dean’s proffered hand and shook it. “So, I just finished listening to my daughter rave about the amazing afternoon she had with the two of you.” Chuck released Dean’s hand.

“She’s a delightful child,” Dean grinned.

“That she is. I thought I would come down here and check on the two of you,” Chuck said in explanation of his presence. “Are you two hungry?”

“We ordered some takeout.”

“Ah, okay,” Chuck said with a nod. “Your mom will be home around 9:30,” he mentioned to Cas.

“Thanks, Dad,” Castiel responded.

“You boys have a good night. I still have work to do.”

“It was good to see you again, Chuck,” Dean added.

“You, too,” he replied and went back up the stairs.

“He was making sure you weren’t doing anything untoward down here to me,” Cas chuckled.

Dean glared at Cas. “Does your entire family think we’re dating?”

Cas face sobered. “No. I don’t believe so. I was joking. My dad was being polite is all.”

“Oh…”

A knock came at the back door.

Castiel’s eyes drifted in the direction of the back door. “Chinese is here.”

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel was having a fantastic time. The way Dean interacted with Hannah was nothing short of incredible. She adored the green-eyed Adonis just as much as he did. Dean obviously equally enjoyed her company,

Unfortunately, Castiel had to admit; he was embarrassed that he was expected to follow their usual routine of singing every song with one another. From what he could tell, Dean enjoyed the performance. Hannah and Castiel alike were disappointed at his limitations. Sadly, he had to admit; he enjoyed  _ Moana _ more when he was acting it out with Hannah. Trying to reenact the movie from his seat on the couch was making him miserable, to say the least.

Watching Dean experience the movie for the first time was baffling. His usual macho exterior was blown to bits by Disney feels on more than one occasion. Castiel was almost brought to tears when Hannah tried to comfort Dean. He knew Dean’s mom had died when he was around Hannah’s age. Considering what he knew of his father, he probably never had the same talk Hannah had when their grandfather died.

When the movie was over, Castiel didn’t know what was going to happen next.  _ Is Dean going to go home? He didn’t bring burgers, so I’m assuming maybe takeout? Should I offer for him to stay for dinner? _ Hannah’s observation that Dean was hungry helped answer his question of what the next step should be. Once Hannah had said good night and was upstairs enjoying her own dinner, Dean and Castiel decided on Chinese.

Castiel still felt the butterflies swarming in his stomach. The anxiety of the entire situation was overwhelming him. He didn’t trust himself. Especially after he almost he almost kissed him earlier in his bedroom. His father was a welcome distraction for a short period of time. Of course, once he was gone, Castiel was left to flounder in Dean’s presence once again. He felt like an absolute doofus after Dean asked if everyone thought they were dating.  _ I don’t bring new people home all the time. Considering you are the only person who is here right now, their assumption is not unwarranted. _

The only person who ever goes to Castiel’s house and spends alone time with him is Charlie. His entire family knows that nothing is ever going to happen there, which he was absolutely fine with. He loved Charlie, but even the thought of anything happening romantically between them made him feel nauseated.

Once the Chinese food arrived, Dean picked up the Roku remote and insisted they watch another movie together. They came across a movie called  _ Starship Troopers _ , and Dean demanded that it should be that one. Castiel agreed and spent the next two hours in horror from how terrible the movie was.

When it was over, Dean's eyes fell upon him with a wide grin. “So, what did you think?”

“That was horrendous. I cannot believe I just spent over two hours watching that nonsense. You actually enjoy that?” Castiel asked. His face screwed up in an expression of disgust.

“Oh, come one, you laughed a couple of times. It’s hilarious,” Dean argued.

“I laughed because the entire movie was completely preposterous. In what world would giant insects invade Earth ? Absolutely absurd,” Castiel rebutted, shaking his head. “At least  _ Fifth Element _ had a somewhat convincing backstory. This movie was… I don’t have enough words to explain how much I detest it.”

Dean scoffed. “Wow, Cas ! Tell me how you really feel.”

“I’m pretty sure that is exactly what I just did.”

“That was rhetorical, Cas,” Dean replied. “Look, how about I come over tomorrow and make it up to you. We’ll watch  _ The Godfather. _ It is literally one of the best movies ever made.”

Castiel made a bitch face. “You claimed this movie was one of the best movies ever made.”

Dean chuckled. “Well, this is not only my opinion we are talking about in this situation.  _ The Godfather  _ is critically acclaimed as one of the best movies of all time. I’m talking top five, Cas.”

“Hmm… Okay. I will watch it with you.”

“Tomorrow?” Dean asked with a hopeful expression.

“Tomorrow,” Castiel agreed with a smile.

Dean’s face lit up. “Awesome.”

Castiel looked at the clock near the TV. “It’s almost nine. You have work tomorrow. You should probably go home and get some rest.”

“Yeah,” Dean responded, his smiling eyes losing some of their luminous beauty. “You’re probably right.” He stood up, checked all of his pockets, and picked up the drawing Hannah had made him. After he confirmed that he had everything, he turned his attention back to Castiel. “Do you want my help cleaning up?”

“No. That won’t be necessary. There isn’t much to clean up. Just a few items to put away.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed. “Are you sure? I don’t mind staying a little longer to help.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Fine,” he conceded. He pointed a finger at Dean. “I will be helping you with the leftovers. There are two containers here. I can manage.”

Dean laughed. “Alright. No arguing here. Come on . L et’s clean up.” He loaded up the massive plate with all of their dirty dishes and followed Castiel into the kitchen.

After Castiel put the food into the fridge , he leaned up against the counter and watched Dean wash the dishes. He was more than a little comfortable with the domesticity of the sight. “You know, we never had another piece of the pie.”

Dean’s shoulders moved as he chuckled. “Well,” he started, looking over his shoulder, “there’s always tomorrow,” he mentioned with a wink.

Castiel rolled his eyes.

Once everything was washed, dried, and back where they belonged, Dean picked up Hannah’s drawing. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Of course,” Castiel confirmed with a grin. “I’ll walk you out.” He followed him to the back door.

Dean hovered at the opening for a few moments. His hesitancy to leave was obvious in the way he carried himself. Dean’s brilliant green eyes locked with Castiel’s and held their gaze. 

Just like Dean, Castiel found himself not wanting Dean to leave. He wanted him to spend just another minute, another hour, in his presence. After all of the anxiety he was feeling, he was surprised that he didn’t want that feeling to go away. He would gladly put up with the butterflies if it meant spending more time with Dean. He felt alive when Dean was around.

Dean leaned in and kissed Castiel gently on the cheek. His eyes fluttered shut from the irresistible feeling of Dean’s lips on his skin. It took an enormous amount of strength not to turn his head and take what he had wanted from the moment Dean entered his house earlier that afternoon.

“Night, Cas,” Dean whispered in his ear.

“Goodnight, Dean,” Castiel breathed back.

When he opened his eyes, Dean was wearing a coy smile. A tinge of pink was coloring his cheeks. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” Dean promised.

“You most certainly will,” Castiel replied.

Dean’s eyes smiled brightly at Castiel’s response. “Night.”

“Goodnight, Dean,” he repeated. He watched Dean round the corner of his house then disappear. When he heard the gate click shut, he closed the back door, locked it, the leaned up against it. His head fell back against the curtain.  _ Oh, boy… How am I going to make it past tomorrow? I can’t take much more of this… _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have met Joan Jett, Cyndi Lauper, and Mandy Moore. Joan is a bamf. Cyndi is one of a kind. Mandy is the sweetest thing. I wish I met the other three. :(


	32. Chapter Thirty-Two

If Dean wasn’t enamored with Cas before, he certainly was now. Every night he would fall asleep picturing Cas’ too blue eyes smiling at him. His dreams were filled with endless laughter and playful banter. Worst of all, his days were overflowing with thoughts of Cas. The distraction had won him a few new drumstick shaped bruises from Pam.  _ Every single one of them was worth it. _ Still, Dean felt like what they had wasn’t enough. Patience was never one of Dean’s strong suits, and after three weeks of waiting for Cas to do something, his saint-like patience was reaching its limit. He wanted more, needed more. He was giving Cas the space and time he had requested, but Dean was starting to think that Cas would never want or need Dean. At least not the way Dean wanted and needed Cas.  _ Maybe, I’m just not enough. _

Almost every day, Cas and Dean followed the same routine. Dean would go over as soon as possible and watch movies with Cas while they ate some form of take-out and/or snack food. Most of the time they would watch their first movie with Hannah. It was usually a toss-up between a Disney or Dreamworks film. However, there was no shortage of Disney movies in the Shurley’s Vudu account, so they generally went with a Disney movie. Once the credits would start to roll on their animated feature presentation, Hannah would go upstairs, and they would watch one of the movies Dean brought with him or select another one off of Vudu. Dean found that he would usually find what he brought with him on the Shurley’s Vudu account. Castiel told him that most of the movies they had on there were purchased by his father.  _ Guys got good taste. _

By the week of Thanksgiving, they had watched over fifty movies. Everything from  _ The Godfather _ , which Cas adored, to  _ Let’s Go To Prison _ . Cas spent the rest of the night after watching that movie saying, “What the hell is woo-ed? Woo-ed is not a word, Dean.”

“It’s what you should prepare to be, Cas. By the master,” Dean would reply with a smirk.

Dean loved arguing with Cas about every film they watched. Their ongoing dialogue throughout the movies, as well as after, helped him get through the day. One of his favorite arguments was the Sunday before Thanksgiving when they watched  _ Big Trouble in Little China _ . Charlie and Jo had joined them for the occasion because Charlie admitted that she loved a good John Carpenter movie.

Dean glanced over in Cas’ direction after it was done. He was met with a completely bewildered expression from Cas. Dean chuckled. “What’s wrong Cas?”

“What is with you and these absolutely implausible movies? This one is almost as horrible as  _ Starship Troopers! _ ” he exclaimed.

“Hey! No judging! That movie is awesome,” Dean argued, trying and failing to hold back his laughter.

“Judging,” Cas deadpanned.

“Oh, come on, Castiel. It wasn’t that bad,” Jo interjected. “I’ve definitely seen worse.”

“You disappointment me, Jo. This movie was terrible,” he complained, his face screwed up in disgust. “How can you follow up  _ Casa Blanca _ with this atrocity?” Cas asked Dean.

Dean slapped his hands on his thighs, feigning frustration. “Come on! What was wrong with this one?”

Cas scoffed. “Seriously? What wasn’t? Lo Pan has to marry someone with green eyes and then sacrifice them? Bunch of nonsense,” he added, shaking his head. “Oh, and what’s worse, the whole pinky thing at the end of the movie!” he ranted, motioning his pinkies like the men in the movie and then hit Dean with a bitch face. “Seriously? Come on!”

Dean threw his entire body into his laugh. “The movie is meant to be corny as fuck, Cas. It wasn’t made to make sense.”

Cas shook his head in exasperation. “The man blew up at the end of the movie, Dean. I don’t see what is so funny about this.”

Dean was starting to find it hard to breathe. “You’re funny,” he said as he continued to laugh.

Cas’ eyes narrowed at Dean. “You think you’re funny, don’t you?”

“I think I’m adorable,” he answered with a smirk.

Cas rolled his eyes. “So, Mr. Adorable, can you’re green eyes break the curse, too? Is that why you showed me this terrible movie!?”

“I don’t know, you tell me.” Dean batted his eyelashes mockingly.

Suddenly, Dean was smacked in the face with one of the decorative pillows from the couch. The culprit, Cas, was biting both of his cheeks and shaking as he tried, and failed, to hide his laughter.

“Oh, that’s it, mister! It’s on!” Dean declared as he grabbed a pillow of his own and smacked Cas back in the face.

With his hands held up in protest, trying to control his fits of laughter, Cas attempted to make his best impression of a sad puppy. “Hey! I’m injured!”

“Lies! It’s all lies! You declared war when you hit me with your pillow of mass destruction!” Dean crowed as he continued to smack Cas with the pillow.

Charlie shot up, grabbed both of their pillows, and threw them to the ground. “Alright! Knock it off, you two!”

Cas crossed his arms over his chest with a huff. “He started it.”

“Well, I’m finishing it!” Charlie barked. “God! The two of you! Is this the way you guys always act?”

“No,” Dean and Cas said in unison.

“Most of the time, we just have a screaming match until we order takeout,” Dean explained. “Or his mom comes downstairs to asks what we’re arguing about.”

“Then she usually joins us,” Cas added.

Jo and Charlie had matching slack-jawed expressions. “She joins you?” Jo asked.

Cas shrugged. “Sometimes.”

Dean looked at Cas. “She watched  _ Indiana Jones _ ,  _ Full Metal Jacket _ , and what else recently?”

Cas snapped his fingers a few times. “Oh, um… What was it?”

“ _ Bram Stoker's Dracula _ ,” Dean supplied, pointer finger held up to help signify his “ **ah-ha** ” moment.

“Oh, yeah. That’s the one with Neo, right?” Cas asked.

Dean chuckled. “You mean, Keanu Reeves?”

“Yes. Him,” Cas confirmed with a nod.

“Geez! How many movies have you two watched?” Charlie inquired, her eyes wide.

“A lot,” Dean replied.

“Shit,” Jo muttered.

“So, are we still on for Friday, Castiel?” Charlie asked as she popped a pretzel into her mouth.

Cas nodded. “As long as Balthazar is still invited, then yes.”

“Pfft, duh! I miss him, too, you know!” Charlie chided with her mouth still full of pretzel.

Castiel held his hands up. “My mistake.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed. “What’s going on Friday?”

“We’re going to go see  _ Justice League _ ,” Jo answered.

“Oh,” Dean murmured.  _ Why didn’t he tell me? _

“You and Sam are more than welcome to join us if you want,” Charlie offered, popping another couple of pretzels into her mouth.

“I don’t want to bother you guys, Cas’ cousin being there and all,” Dean explained. He could feel Cas’ eyes on him.

“You won’t be imposing,” Castiel exhorted. “If anything, Balthazar would be excited to meet you.”

Dean met Cas’ gaze. “Really?” he asked, the single word filled with insurmountable hope.

“Of course,” Cas responded, his eyes falling towards his knotted fingers. “He, um… He’s heard a lot about you.”

Dean leaned back in his seat on the couch; arms crossed over his chest. “Really?” he asked with a smirk. “You talking about me to other people?”

Charlie rolled her eyes. “Like that’s anything new,” she mumbled.

“Charlie,” Cas growled.

“What!? It’s not like it’s not true!” Charlie challenged.

“Charlie!” Jo roared. “Knock it off! He’s clearly uncomfortable.”

“Ugh,” Charlie huffed. “Why are you defending him!? I’m sick of this nonsense!”

“Not now, Charlie!” Jo barked. Her eyes left no room for argument.

“Um,” Dean began, “Am I missing something here?”

“Winchester, I will punch you if you push it! Do you hear me?” Jo snapped.

Dean’s eyes widened. “Geez! Fuck! Sorry, I asked.”

After an awkward amount of silence filled the room, Dean glanced over at Cas. His face was scarlet from embarrassment.

“So… Who’s up for another movie and some takeout?” Dean inquired. “My treat!”

Everyone jumped at the offer.

_ Save in a beaut, Winchester. _

 

>>>>>>

 

“So, I’m going to be able to meet the boy?” Balthazar asked with a taunting tone.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Yes. You’re going to get to meet him. He’s going to the movies with us on Friday.”

The video lagged as Balthazar clapped his hands. “Fabulous! Shall I be gentle, or do you prefer I interrogate him properly?”

“Please do not torture him, Zar!”

Balthazar pointed a hand at himself. “Me? Torture? Cassie, darling, I do not recall proposing any such thing. Honestly, Cassie, what do you take me for?” he asked with a cheeky grin.

Castiel threw his hands up. “You see? That face,” Castiel pointed at the screen, “ right there, is why I am questioning your intentions.”

“I swear to you; I will not torment the boy. However, Cassie, dear, you have been doing nothing but talking about this boy for the past couple of months. I need to make sure that he is worthy of you. You do realize that, right?” Balthazar inquired. His face sobered to show his sincerity.

“Yes, Zar, I know. I just… I don’t want you to frighten him off,” Castiel admitted as he worried his bottom lip. “Things have been so perfect between the two of us the past three weeks. I don’t want to ruin it.”

“You really like him, don’t you?”

Castiel nodded. “He’s… He’s incredible, Zar. He comes over almost every day. We watch movies, but to be honest, most of the time it’s the conversations we have that matter. He challenges me. Makes me think. I enjoy arguing with him. Isn’t that weird? I enjoy it! It’s not just that either. The passion he has for music… The only person I have ever seen feel music the way he does is your mom. To be honest, the only time his free time isn’t spent with me is when he is rehearsing with his band. And don’t even get me started on how beautiful his singing voice is. We were watching  _ Tangled  _ with Hannah; he started to sing Flynn’s part in ‘See the Light.’ I felt chills…” Castiel stopped when he saw his cousin’s smirk. “What?”

“Oh, nothing. Just… do hearts come out of your eyes when you’re around him as well? Or is it only when you’re talking about him?”

“Zar,” Castiel growled.

“Cassie, I have a question. Why are you two not together yet? It’s obvious that you want to be with him. What’s holding you back?”

“That’s two questions,” he groaned.

“Just answer the bloody questions!” Balthazar snapped. “Because honestly, cousin, you’re being a little shit about all of this.”

If Castiel were to be completely honest with himself, he didn’t know why they weren’t together yet. There was nothing holding them back. It was clear that Castiel had forgiven Dean for everything that had happened after the first week they spent together watching movies. The main reason why Castiel hadn’t attempted to pursue a romantic relationship with Dean was that Dean hadn’t shown even the slightest amount of interest in him since the night they watched  _ Moana _ . Dean would flirt, of course. Flirting was programmed into his DNA, but that was it. Dean hadn’t kissed him on the cheek after that first night. They sat close to one another, but they never touched. Frankly, he couldn’t remember the last time they even hugged each other in greeting.

Balthazar cleared his throat to bring Castiel back. “I’m waiting.”

Castiel bowed his head. “He doesn’t want me. Not anymore.”

“You must be joking, Cassie. You can’t honestly be that dimwitted,” Balthazar huffed.

“Zar, he has no interest in me in that way anymore. I told him I wanted to be friends and that’s what I have, a friend. I am forever going to be in the ‘friendzone,’” Castiel grumbled. “I’m so stupid.”

“Cassie, you yourself said that the boy spends every moment of his free time with you. No man on this earth does that unless they want you. He may not say it, but him being with you as often as he is… Well, that’s proof enough in my book.”

“I don’t know, Zar. He hasn’t shown the slightest amount of interest in me since the beginning of the month. I think he gave up,” Castiel muttered towards his knotted fingers.

Balthazar sighed in exasperation. “Get your head out of your arse, Castiel!”

“Zar, you’re wro…”

“I am not wrong!” he snapped. “I will show you while I am there that you, Cassie, are the one who is wrong!”

Castiel exhaled a deep breath through his nose.  _ Whatever… _ “Speaking of which, when are you getting here?”

“Nice change of subject…” he shook his head. “We arrive at JFK around two pm tomorrow.”

“Oh, thank God!” Castiel exclaimed in relief. “Laguardia is a nightmare on a normal day. This time of year, it’s a war zone!”

“I have been to New York quite a few times. Laguardia is forever under construction. It’s part of the reason why we are flying into JFK.”

“Is Aunt Amara really coming?”

“Surprisingly enough, yes. She has some business to handle on the island.”

Castiel’s eyebrows shot up. “Really? On the island?”

“Shocking, I know. Unfortunately, it’s nothing but bad news for the talent. Or in this case, lack thereof.”

_ Huh? _ “What do you mean?”

“Mum settled is what. She took on this God awful band. Lost money in the process. She originally had her eyes set on another band. The way she talked about them,” Balthazar said as he shook his head. “Obsessed.”

“What was their name?”

Balthazar looked up as he furrowed his eyebrows, lost in thought. “Hmm… I can’t recall,” he glanced down and tapped his finger on his bottom lip. “Well, fuck… What was their bloody name?”

“It’s okay if you don’t remember.”

Balthazar sighed with a shrug. “Sorry, darling, studies have turned my brain to absolute mush.”

Castiel chuckled. “It’s okay.”

“Anway, she has to tell this other band that they are absolute shit and drop them. They’re called something brother… or is it, son?” Balthazar asked himself. He shrugged once again. “I don’t give a flying fuck what they’re called. Why am I bothering? Point is, I’ve listened to their brand of nonsense. They sound like cats screaming in the dead of night.”

“Geez!” Castiel’s nose scrunched as he grimaced. “That bad?”

“To be honest, even that is putting it nicely. Their music is an atrocity to the senses. Painful to the ears.”

“Wow!”

“Tell me about it,” Balthazar groaned. “Listen, I still have quite a bit of preparation to take care of before tomorrow’s flight. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Waiting until last minute? Really?” Castiel snarked.

“Oh, shut up,” Balthazar snapped.

Castiel laughed. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Zar.”

“Ta-ta,” he said, then ended the call.

 

>>>>>>

 

“His cousin is going to hate me,” Dean muttered.

Sam was throwing Dean his millionth bitch face of the night. “Then don’t go, Dean.”

“I can’t not go! He’d definitely hate me if I suddenly decide that I’m not going,” Dean affirmed.

Benny’s head was in his hands. “We’ve been arguing about this for almost an hour, brotha. We all came here for band practice. Can we please get back to doing that?”

“And you call me a bitch,” Sam griped.

“Well, excuse me for being indecisive,” Dean snapped.

Pam rolled her eyes. “Look, hot shot, we’ve got a couple of gigs coming up. Luckily, some of our old haunts still seem to have a bit of interest in us. Now, I for one want to make sure we rock at our first fucking show in ages. That’s why I’m here,” she barked. “Instead, I’ve had to deal with yet another night of the ‘why doesn’t Cas want me?’ show,” she mocked.

Dean glared at her. “Fuck you, Pam! It’s not like I didn’t have to deal with your moping ass when Jesse was around!”

Pam nearly jumped over her drums kit. “Oh, that’s fucking it, Winchester!”

“Hey! Knock it off!” Garth demanded as he stepped between the two of them. “Enough! Alright?”

Dean was being held back by Benny as Sam stood in front of Pam, the two of them were glowering at one another.

“She started it!” Dean protested.

“No, you started it, dickbag!” Pam shot back.

“The both of you, shut the hell up!” Garth ordered. He stood in front of Dean with his arms crossed over his chest as he scowled. “Look, Dean, I’ve known you a long time. Longer than anyone else in this garage, besides Sam. I know when you’re being an idiot. Right now, you’re being a massive one,” Garth stated without remorse. “Now, Sam has already informed you, several times tonight, that Cas is  **one hundred percent** interested in you. For the life of me, I cannot understand why the two of you don’t pull your heads out of your asses and do something about it!”

“He doesn’t want me to make a move. He would have said something by now if he wants me!” Dean fumed.

Sam groaned from his corner. “I swear! Charlie is right about the two of you! You’re both a couple of dumbasses.”

Pam started packing up her stuff.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” Dean demanded.

With her snare drum in her hands, Pam plowed through Dean and Garth in the direction the garage door button. She slammed her elbow into it and marched up to the door as it made its ascent.

“Hey!”

“What!?” she barked as she snapped her head in Dean’s direction.

Dean tried to grab the snare drum from Pam. “We’re not done yet!”

“No, Dean. We’ve been done since about thirty minutes after set up. The second you brought up your Sunday night we were done,” She roared, ripping the snare drum back out of his hands and stomping off towards Benny’s truck.

“We still have an entire set to get through, Pam!” Dean shouted as he followed her.

Pam placed the drum gently on the driveway and marched back up to Dean. “Where are your nuts, Winchester?”

“Excuse me!?”

“You heard me,” she growled. “Where are your fucking balls? Because the Dean Winchester I know wouldn’t be acting like a pussy!”

“I’m not a pussy!”

Pam got right into Dean’s personal space and gave him a once-over. “Yeah? Prove it!”

“I’m not a pussy, Pam!” he growled.

She rolled her eyes. “Go to the movies, Dean. Who gives a fuck if his cousin doesn’t like you? Cas  **likes** you. A lot, from what Sam says. So , pull your head out of your ass, grow back your fucking balls, and make a fucking move already! For Christ sakes! If you guys are not together by next week, I will lose my shit!”

Dean opened his mouth to argue.

“So help me, Dean, if the next words out of your mouth are not ‘I plan on jumping his bones on Friday at the theater , ’ I will punch you. I am not joking!”

Dean gritted his teeth as he stared daggers at Pam. He knew she was right. For some reason, he was playing it safe with Cas, and he didn’t have an excuse. Not anymore. Dean had been spending every available moment with Cas because there was nowhere else he would rather be. Instead of showing Cas what he wanted, had always wanted, he keeps him at a distance when he’s around him. Things between them had changed over the past few weeks. Before they started spending time with one another, Dean knew he wanted Cas. There was never any argument there. The first time he saw him, he was already thinking about fucking him. However, now, he needed him. If he didn’t talk to Cas, his day was incomplete. Most of the time he wondered how he used to get through a single day without being able to talk to Cas. He found himself checking his phone, constantly, waiting for another snarky text to come. Waiting for a call to let him know when he should come over the next day. Dean was hooked, and Pam was right, he needed to grow a pair.

“You’re right,” he conceded.

Pam’s eyebrows shot up. She crossed her arms over her chest and put all of her weight on her right hip. A smug grin appeared on her face. “It’s about time you realized that, Dean.”

His shoulders slumped. “Can we get back to practicing now? The show isn’t until the end of December, but again you’re right. We need to rock.”

“That’s the spirit!” She slapped him on the back with a cocky smile. “Now, let me grab the snare so we can get this show on the road.”

Dean entered the garage with his head bowed.

“So, what’s the verdict, brotha?” Benny asked with a knowing grin.

Dean shrugged. “Looks like I’m going to the movies.”

 

>>>>>>

 

**Dean: Heya, Cas! What’re you up to?**

**Castiel: I’m on my first non-medical outing in weeks.**

**Dean: Really? Where?**

**Castiel: Riverhead. My mom has to pick up the turkey.**

**Dean: You do realize there are grocery stores nearby that sell turkey, right? Lol**

**Castiel: It’s not a Miloski’s Poultry Farm turkey, Dean. Trust me; it’s worth the trip.**

**Dean: If you say so.**

**Castiel: You’re seriously arguing after trying the pie from Briermere?**

**Dean: I stand corrected. You’re allowed to make your trip out east.**

**Castiel: I don’t recall asking for permission.**

**Castiel: What are you doing today?**

**Dean: Well, I was going to ask if you wanted to hang out, but you’re busy, so…**

**Castiel: It’s the day before Thanksgiving, Dean. Most people are busy.**

**Dean: Well, what about later? It’s only ten right now. What are you doing tonight?**

**Castiel: My family is flying in from Heathrow. They should be at my house by four unless traffic is horrendous.**

**Dean: Oh, okay.**

**Castiel: You’re still coming to the movies on Friday, right?**

**Dean: I wouldn’t miss it. :)**

**Castiel: Good. I can’t wait for you to meet Balthazar.**

**Dean: I look forward to it.**

 


	33. Chapter Thirty-Three

Thanksgiving was usually an exciting time of the year in the Shurley household. Most of the time they would spend up to three days in preparation for the event. On the day before Thanksgiving, it was a tradition of theirs to drive out to Sound Avenue and stop at Lewin’s to pick up all the ingredients for the sides. Then they would stop by Miloski’s Poultry Farm to pick up the turkey his mom had reserved months ago. However, this year, it was only his Parents, Hannah, and Castiel, who was making the trip out east. Gabriel was meeting Michael in the city. Apparently, Kali, Michael, and Gabriel were going to see  _ The Book of Mormon _ that night. So, Gabriel wanted to be at JFK to pick him up.

His aunt and Balthazar, who he would prefer to see over Michael any day, would be heading directly to them after they land. One of the perks of being the CEO of Obscurité Entertainment was having a company vehicle waiting at almost every destination. Which, coincidentally, was also one of the perks of being related to the CEO of Obscurité Entertainment. They never had to worry about picking her up from the airport.

As soon as they got home, everyone, except, of course, Hannah, was given their prep tasks. Castiel was always in charge of the green beans and peeling. He  **hated** peeling. Especially, turnips.  _ No one eats this friggin thing except Gabriel for some random reason! Why doesn’t he peel it?! _ Much to Castiel’s chagrin, his mom had spent the entire previous day baking. Castiel loved making the pies, cookies, and cakes with her and Gabriel every year. Unfortunately, Becky was still fussing over him and his wounds. Even though he could take care of eighty-five percent of his daily activities without a problem, Becky always felt the need to coddle him.

Around four, Castiel started to get antsy. He knew that his family would be there any minute. The beans, spuds, and ghastly turnip, although they were mostly finished, could wait. He wanted to spend time with the family he hardly ever sees.

When a knock came from the front door, Castiel knew that his family had arrived. His mother’s scowl was the only thing that kept him in his seat, peeling those God-forsaken potatoes. Chuck strolled casually over to the front door to let in his sister and nephew.

“Hiya, sis!” Chuck exclaimed by the front door.

Castiel stood up at a pace that he knew would appease Becky and followed the sound of his father’s voice to the front door.

The first person he saw was his aunt. It had been almost three years since he last saw her in person. Even if he had tried, Castiel would not have been able to stop his tears of joy.

“Oh, Castiel!” she hung up her coat and darted over to him. After wrapping her arms around him and kissing his cheek, she held him at arm's length and beamed. “How’s my favorite nephew?”

“Aunt Amara, you can’t say things like that,” Castiel chastised while trying to suppress a grin.

Amara waived the comment off dismissively. “Pfft, bull shit, I can’t. He’s not here right now. I can say what I want,” she asserted, wrapping her arms around him for another hug. “It’s been too long, Castiel. I’ve missed you,” she murmured.

“I’ve missed you, too, Aunt Amara,” Castiel replied, hugging her a little tighter.

“What? Now, since she’s here, I’m the red-headed stepchild?” Balthazar asked.

Castiel chuckled as he released his aunt. “Of course, not!” He wrapped his arms around his cousin. “I’m so happy you’re here, Zar!”

Balthazar gave him a big kiss on the cheek. “Well, why wouldn’t you be? I’m your favorite cousin.”

Castiel shook his head as they separated. “What is with you two today? You can’t just say things like that!”

Balthazar barked out a laugh. “Castiel, if there is one thing you can trust when it comes to me, it is that I will never hold back.”

Castiel could feel the color drain from his face. “Please, don’t do that Friday!”

“What’s happening on Friday?” Amara inquired.

“We’re going to the movies. Castiel’s boy is going to be in attendance,” Balthazar teased with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle.

“He’s not my boy, Zar,” Castiel muttered. He walked away and entered the kitchen.

“Oh, really?” Balthazar questioned as he followed Castiel into the kitchen. “So, I haven’t heard you talk about nothing else for the past couple of months?”

“Zar,” Castiel growled.

Hannah came into the room, rubbing her eyes.

“Oh, honey, I’m sorry. Did we wake you up?” Becky asked voice laced with guilt.

“No, mommy,” she said as she shook her head. She shied away from the group.

Becky knelt and smoothed some of Hannah’s hair behind her left ear. “You remember Aunt Amara and your cousin Balthazar, sweetie, right?”

Hannah nodded shyly.

Amara smiled down at Hannah. “Hey, pumpkin! I brought you some presents! You wanna see them?”

A wide grin spread across Hannah’s face. She nodded adamantly.

“Come. Into the living room. I’ll show you,” Amara requested. She held out her hand for Hannah.

Hannah accepted the proffered hand with delight and walked into the living room. Chuck followed with a bag that Castiel could only assume held the gifts. Becky followed closely after.

“Let us adjourn to your room, Cassie,” Balthazar ordered. He turned on his heels and started to move in the direction of the stairs.

“I have things to peel.”

“Yes. Fascinating,” Balthazar noted sarcastically. “Come on. Don’t dawdle.”

“Zar, I can’t ju…”

“You can and you will. Now, come, before I change my mind about playing nice on Friday,” Balthazar warned.

Castiel’s shoulders slumped. “Fine,” he sighed. “But if I get in trouble, it’s your fault.”

“Certo, mio cugino!”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Sei pazzo.”

“Ah, but you see, we’re related. My psychosis is genetic. You could inherit this,” Balthazar waved a hand over himself, “Someday.”

“One can only hope not,” Castiel groaned, then begrudgingly followed his cousin down the stairs to his room.

 

>>>>>>

 

After spending at least eight hours in the kitchen with Ellen, Thanksgiving dinner was finally ready. For some reason, dinner always falls around three o’clock on Thanksgiving, but Dean figured it probably had something to do with the holiday’s tradition of people stuffing their face until they inevitably pass out on the couch for an hour or two before dessert is served. Which this year consisted of three different kinds of pie. One he made, one from Ellen, and then one from Briermere. Dean had never had pear pie, but he was willing to bet that since it was a Briermere pie, he wouldn’t regret the purchase.

The holiday season, in general, was never a big deal until Sam and Dean started to live with Bobby. Most of the time Thanksgiving with his biological father was a bucket of extra crispy while John passed out drunk on the couch. The one tradition that had stuck all of these years was watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and then watching _ Babes in Toyland _ with Sammy. Unfortunately, watching movies just didn’t feel right without Cas there. He took out his phone and texted Cas while Barnby made an attempt on Bo Peep.

**Dean: Happy Thanksgiving, Cas!**

Dean didn’t expect a text back, but he just missed spending time with him. They hadn’t seen one another since Monday. It might as well have been a lifetime considering all of the time they had been spending together. He was more than a little surprised when he received a response within a minute of his text.

**Cas: Same to you, gorgeous!**

_ Gorgeous? Is he drunk? _

**Dean: How ya feelin’, Cas?**

**Cas: Incredible, you?**

**Dean: Have you been drinking? Lol**

**Cas: No.**

**Dean: Is that no a yes?**

**Cas: Yes.**

**Dean: Wine?**

**Cas: Scotch.**

Dean chuckled.  _ That’s my ma… Not mine… _ He took a deep breath, then continued their conversation.

**Dean: Going for the hard stuff, huh?**

**Cas: It was either scotch or vodka. I decided I was not in the mood to consume rubbing alcohol. Hence, scotch.**

**Dean: Good choice.**

**Cas: Is it tomorrow yet?**

**Dean: No. Unfortunately.**

**Cas: Can you come over? I miss you.**

_ God, that offer is so tempting. _

**Dean: It’s Thanksgiving, Cas. You should spend it with your family.**

**Cas: I’ll make it worth your while ;)**

His eyebrows shot up.

**Dean: Really? How’s that?**

**Cas: A few things come to mind.**

Dean’s heart stopped.

**Dean: What are those things?**

**Cas: That’s for me to know and you to find out, handsome ;)**

_ He’s drunk… he doesn’t mean what he’s saying. _

**Dean: You’ve been drinking, Cas.**

**Cas: Doesn’t make me want you any less. Sober or not, you’re still hot.**

_ WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?!?!?!?! _

**Dean: Don’t tempt me, Cas… You have no idea how much I want you.**

He hit send and instantly regretted his decision.  _ Fuck! What the hell are you thinking?! Stop it! You’ll ruin everything! _

**Cas: Then, what are you waiting for? You know what you want. Take it.**

“Hey, man? You okay?” Sam asked a concerned expression painted his face.

“Huh?”

“You’re breathing heavy, and your face is bright red,” Sam explained, his hand on Dean’s shoulder. “Is everything okay?”

Dean was becoming more uncomfortable by the second. Even more so when he noticed the growing bulge in his tight black jeans. “Uh… yeah… I’m…” he could hardly get the words out. “I’ll be right back,” he blurted, then darted to the bathroom.

When he entered the bathroom, he turned on the tap. He reread Cas’ last message.  _ What the fuck?! Does he mean this?! He’s drunk… he can’t possibly mean this. _ He put his cell phone on the counter and splashed some water on his face a few times as he attempted to calm himself down. After taking a few deep breaths, he wiped off his face, then glared down at his dick.  _ This is always your fault.  _ Dean read Cas’ text one last time before he decided to hit the call button.  _ I need to hear his voice before I make any rash decisions. For all I know, he is completely obliterated and has no idea what he’s saying.  _ It rang a few times before it went to voicemail.

“ _ This is my voicemail. Make your voice… a mail. _ ”

Dean snickered.  _ Only Cas would have that as his message machine _ . He typed out a quick text.

**Dean: Love the voicemail. Call me back. We need to talk.**

 

>>>>>>

 

“Mom? Have you seen my phone?”

Becky stood up from her seat on the couch. Her eyes began to survey her surroundings before she shrugged and looked at Castiel. “No, sweetie, I haven’t. When’s the last time you saw it?”

“It was plugged into the charger in my room.”

Her eyebrows furrowed. “It may have fallen onto the floor. Did you check under your bed?”

_ How on earth could it fall off my nightstand if I didn’t touch it?  _ “No. I’ll go check again.” He made the short journey back to his room to try to find his phone.

When he opened his bedroom door, he was shocked to find that his phone was precisely where he had initially left it.  _ Did I just imagine that it wasn’t there?  _ He rounded his bed and unplugged it. The screen lit up displaying a missed call and a new text message. He entered his password and unlocked his phone. Castiel swiped his finger from the top of the phone to display his notifications. The missed call was from Dean as was the text.

**Dean: Love the voicemail. Call me back. We need to talk.**

Castiel squinted down at the notification with a perplexed expression.  _ What? _ He opened the text, ready to ask what they needed to talk about when he noticed a lengthy text conversation that he did not have with Dean. With every text he read, his eyes grew wider in horror. When he read the last text that he had not sent to Dean, it took every ounce of self-control to not scream in anguish.  _ Oh, my God! _ “BALTHAZAR!!!!!!!!!” he hollered.

Livid, at that moment, was a vast understatement. Castiel barged out of his bedroom and instantly began his search for his traitorous cousin.  _ I’m going to murder him! _ “Balthazar!” he yelled. Unfortunately, he had no choice but to take it easy on the stairs, but when he finally reached the top, he stomped into the living room. Castiel glared at his family. Everyone was present except for Michael, Gabriel, and, of course, Balthazar. “Where is Balthazar?!”

His Aunt Amara was the one to supply the answer. “They’re out running a quick errand. Michael needed something at Walmart, Gabriel and Balthazar decided to join him.”

_ The chicken shit!  _ Castiel put his hands in his hair and started to pull.  _ I’m gonna kill him! What the hell am I going to say to Dean?  _ Not only did Balthazar act as if Castiel was drunk, he basically told Dean to come and get it.  _ Isn’t that exactly what you want? _

“Are you okay, Castiel?” Amara inquired as she approached him.

Castiel didn't realize he had just been pacing in front of his entire family until his aunt had placed a hand on his shoulder to stop him. He knew that he looked like a man on the edge, but he couldn’t help himself.  _ What if he screwed everything up? Things have been so perfect! _ “I’ll be fine.”

“That’s a load of crap, Castiel,” his aunt rebutted. Amara turned towards the rest of the family. “We’ll be right back,” she announced.

Amara led Castiel back to his room to give them some privacy. She had Castiel sit down on his bed as she pulled his desk chair in front of him. “Talk,” she ordered.

“It’s nothing.”

“Bull shit, Castiel,” she snapped. “I may not see you as often as I used to, but I still know you. What did my son do?”

He huffed out a sigh. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll figure it out.”

Amara crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back in the desk chair. “Does this have anything to do with the boy?”

“No…”

“Liar.”

He threw his head back and groaned, “Yes.”

“What did he do?”

Castiel grabbed his phone out of his back pocket and unlocked it. He read what Balthazar had texted Dean. “I don’t know how to fix this.”

“Do you like him?” she asked.

“Dean?”

She nodded.

_ You have no idea how much. _ “Yes.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

His jaw dropped. “Are you serious? Did you not just hear what he said?”

“I did.”

“Then how is this not a problem?”

She shook her head. “Castiel, you approach everything the same way you approached the piano the first time. You’re eyes wide with wonder, but wary of the unknown. However, once you started playing, there was no stopping you. Balthazar, well, he is an entirely different beast. He dives into the unknown. Shoot first, ask questions later. He probably thinks he’s helping.”

Castiel bowed his head. “But what if he’s not? What if he just ruined everything?”

“I highly doubt he did.”

“What should I do?”

Amara leaned forward. She put her elbows on her thighs and rubbed her hands together. “Well, if it were me, I would tell Dean the truth. Tell him that Balthazar is the one who sent them,” she suggested. “However, don’t lie and say that what was said in those texts is false. Anyone with eyes would be able to see that what Balthazar told Dean is true.”

“What Balthazar was implying is that I want Dean to take me,” Castiel sputtered.

She leaned back in the chair again. “Well, is he wrong?”

He shrugged. “I wouldn’t use those words, but I do have interest in Dean of a romantic nature.”

Amara guffawed. “I know I shouldn’t be instigating here, but ‘romantic nature’ is a less crass way of saying you want to get into his pants.”

Castiel blushed.

“He must be hot.”

He nodded meekly. “Yes, very.”

“Got any pictures of him?”

Castiel shook his head.

“Pity. Usually, Deans are attractive. I’m assuming from the shade of red you’re turning, this Dean is no exception.”

“Understatement,” he deadpanned.

She laughed. “So, what are you going to do?”

Castiel stared at the wall as he spoke. “First, I’m going to yell at your son. Then... Well, I guess I’m going to the movies.”

“I meant what are you going to do tonight? It’s only six. You realize, he’s probably going to expect you to call him tonight?”

“Ugh,” he grunted. “Do I have to call him tonight?” he asked, his head in his hands. “I’m so embarrassed.”

“Unfortunately, nephew, you’re going to have to say something. How would you feel if Dean sent you something like that and then never called you back?”

_ Pretty awful… _

“That’s what I thought.”

There was a knock on the door. “Everything okay in here?” Becky asked, poking her head into the room.

“Absolutely,” Amara replied as she stood. “My son, the little shit that he is, played a prank on Castiel,” she explained.

Becky arched an eyebrow. “Should I be concerned, Amara?”

“Nah,” Amara dismissively waved off the comment. “It’s been fixed.”

Castiel knew just by looking at his mom that she did not believe a single word. “Uh-huh,” Becky said as she crossed her arms over her chest and leaned against the door frame. “If you say so.”

Castiel bowed his head to avoid his mother’s scrutinizing gaze.

“The boys are back,” Becky informed. “Thought I’d let you know.”

“Thank you, Becky. I have a few words to say to my son,” Amara stated and left the room.

Becky entered the room and sat next to Castiel. “What happened?”

“Balthazar unlocked my phone and texted Dean,” he responded.

“Well,” Becky began, “that’s what you get for having your birthday as your phone’s password.”

Castiel’s head snapped up to look at his mother. “How did you know?”

“Because I know you,” she stated with a smile.

He put his head in his hands. “I’m such an idiot.”

“No, sweetheart. You’re not. Just naive at times,” she corrected.

“Thanks. That makes me feel a lot better,” Castiel mumbled with a bitch face.

“So, what did he say?” Becky inquired.

“He told Dean that I like him.”

“That’s news?” she asked with a bemused expression.

Castiel’s head fell back into his hands. “He told him that I want him and that I think he’s hot.”

Becky giggled. “Again, that’s news?”

“Mom!” Castiel whined.

“What?! You know I’m right!”

He sat up straight and looked up at the ceiling.  _ Why me? _ “He asked him to come over and told him to take what he wants. He also told him that I had been drinking scotch.”

His mom scoffed. “You? Drink? That’s hilarious.”

Castiel’s head lolled in the direction of his mother’s face. He responded to her comment with another bitch face. “Mom? Seriously?”

“What did Dean do?”

He looked at the ground. “He called. When I didn’t answer, he sent me a text saying that we need to talk.”

“Good.”

He narrowed his eyes at Becky. “Good? How is any of this good?”

“You can trust him. That’s what’s good.”

“What?”

“Well, ‘you’ told Dean that you had been drinking and that you wanted him to come over for God knows what. Dean could have A, shown up here ready to take what he wants. Or B, called to make sure that you were in the right frame of mind to be making decisions like that. He chose option B,” she explained. “He doesn’t want to take advantage of you,” she added with a smile. “He deserves a gold star in my book for that.”

Castiel rolled his eyes as he smiled. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“I am right,” she objected.

“You are right,” he concurred, grinning.

She nudged him. “Call him.”

“I will,”

Becky stood up. “I’ll leave you to it.” Just before she was about to close the door, she said, “If I were you, knowing your cousin, I would lock your door before you call. Give yourself some privacy.”

Castiel nodded. “Thanks, mom. I’m going to call now. Can you turn the lock for me?” he asked.

“Of course,” she answered, then locked the door before she closed it.

After unlocking his phone, Castiel selected Dean’s name from his contacts and hit the phone icon.  _ Here goes nothing… _

 

>>>>>>

 

For the next couple of hours, Dean checked his phone regularly. When the response to his text didn’t come, he figured Cas probably passed out from drinking.  _ I don’t think Cas has ever mentioned that he drinks. Maybe it’s a holiday thing… _

When his phone started to ring at a little after seven, Dean nearly jumped out of his skin. He got up from the couch and walked to his room. As soon as he was in the privacy of his room he answered without bothering to check the caller ID. “Hello?”

“ _ Hello, Dean. _ ”

“Hey, Cas,” he croaked.  _ Pull it together, Winchester. _ He cleared his throat. “How’s your night going?”

A deep breath and a sigh came through the speaker of his phone. “ _ I’m so sorry, Dean _ .”

His heart dropped. “For what?”

“ _ My cousin, Balthazar, is the one who sent those texts. Not me _ ,” Cas explained.

“Oh.”  _ So, he doesn’t want me… Fucking figures.  _ “It’s okay, Cas.”

“ _ No, Dean. It’s really not _ ,” Cas rebutted. “ _ That was extremely rude and inappropriate. _ ”

He shrugged even though he knew Cas couldn’t see him. “Shit happens.”

“ _ I have to admit; I am pleased that you called first rather than showing up unannounced. That would have made this entire debacle worse. _ ”

“Well, ‘you’ said that ‘you’ had been drinking. If something were ever to happen, I want consent from a sober mind, not an intoxicated one.”  _ I’m not a monster. _

“ _ I know, Dean. I know I can trust you. _ ”

“Good.”

“ _ I haven’t been drinking. _ ”

Dean chuckled. “I kinda figured.”

There was a moment of awkward silence.

“Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, Cas,” Dean said to cut through the silence.

“ _ Of course, Dean. I… _ ” Cas sighed. “ _ I’ll see you tomorrow. _ ”

“Night, Cas.”

“ _ Goodnight, Dean. _ ”

Dean waited for Cas to hang up. He didn’t. “Did you want to say something else, Cas?”

“ _ I… _ ” he stammered. Castiel groaned. “ _ No, _ ” he snapped.

Dean’s eyebrows shot up. He could hear the frustration in Cas’ voice. “Is that no a yes?”

All Dean could hear was Cas’ erratic breathing coming through the phone.

“Are you okay?” Dean asked.

“ _ He wasn’t lying. _ ”

“Who wasn’t lying?”

“ _ Balthazar. What he said. It’s not a lie. _ ”

“What?” Dean breathed.

“ _ I… um… I’ll see you tomorrow, _ ” Castiel blurted, then hung up the phone.

Dean stared at his phone with a slack-jawed expression for around two minutes after Cas hung up.  _ Did he…? Does he…? What? _ There was a knock at his door. “Yeah?”

Sam opened the door. “What’s going on? You almost ran in… What’s with the face?”

Dean shook his head to clear it. “What?”

“Are you feeling okay?” Sam asked as he raised an eyebrow at Dean.

“I’m…” his face split into a massive grin. “I’m fucking awesome, man!”

Sam’s eyebrows shot up. “Um… okay? Why?”

Dean didn’t answer Sam’s question. He continued to smile like a doofus.

Inevitably, Sam figured out what was going on. “About fucking time,” he huffed and left the room.

_ Sure is… _

 

>>>>>>

 

Even after berating Balthazar for a half an hour, his cousin still didn’t seem to care. “If you ask me, Cassie, I don’t understand why what I did bothers you. Dean didn’t lose his shit, and you finally told him how you feel. That seems like a win to me.”

“That’s not the point, Zar. You could have seriously fucked everything up! What if he didn’t feel the same way?!”

Balthazar rolled his eyes. “I believe I already explained this to you. Dean would not spend every spare moment he has with you unless he has feelings for you. From what he said, he wants you just as much as you want him. Maybe even more.”

“Not possible,” Castiel mumbled.

“See! I helped!” Balthazar exclaimed, his hands held in front of him.

Castiel slammed Balthazar with a bitch face. “You’re lucky you did.”

Balthazar slapped his hands together. “Well, now that we’ve settled that, let’s go upstairs and have some of your mother’s incredible pecan pie before I have to go to the Marriott with mother and Michael.”

“Yeah, why not.”


	34. Chapter Thirty-Four

Black Friday, shopping nightmare of the year. From what Dean could tell, it was a movie theater nightmare as well. _Thank God we bought our tickets on Sunday._ They pulled into the parking lot of Island 16 Cinema De Lux about an hour before the movie was due to start. Dean parked all the way in the back of the parking, as per usual, to keep his Baby away from neglectful theater patrons. Jo complained the entire walk to the back entrance, but Dean just ignored her.

The closer Dean got to the theater, the more nervous he felt. His palms were sweaty; his heart was racing, his face was flushed. A few days ago, Dean was nervous about meeting Balthazar. Now, he was terrified to see Cas. Deep down, he knew he was being a fucking idiot, but he was apprehensive about the entire situation. _What if what he said yesterday before he hung up was a mistake? If it’s not, what if he changed his mind?_

If Dean thought the parking lot was packed, the inside of the theater was a zoo. From what he could tell, there was no possible way that they were going to be able to find Charlie, Cas, and Balthazar in this crowd. Even so, like a moth to a flame, he found Cas within a minute. _I’d recognize that sex hair anywhere,_ he smirked.

As if Cas could feel Dean’s presence, he turned and locked eyes with Dean. His face flushed and he bowed his head with a coy smile.

Dean couldn’t help but grin at the sight of Cas. The butterflies in his stomach began to flutter lightly. _Apparently, he hasn’t changed his mind._ By the time Dean was right in front of Cas, the butterflies had begun to swarm. “Heya, Cas,” he said with a crooked smile.

“Hello, Dean,” Castiel replied, his face flushing a bit further.

Dean faced Charlie. “Hey, Charlie.”

“Hi, Dean,” she responded quickly before she wrapped her arms around Jo and gave her a lingering kiss. “Hey, beautiful.”

Jo answered Charlie’s greeting with another kiss.

_Sometimes they’re so adorable it’s nauseating._

The blonde that was with Charlie and Cas was squinting at Dean.

“Hi, you must be Balthazar,” Dean stated as he held out his hand.

“Do I know you?” Balthazar asked, ignoring Dean’s proffered hand.

He dropped his hand. “No. I don’t think so. I’ve never been to London.”

Balthazar shook his head as if to clear it. “Sorry, you just look incredibly familiar. But yes, I am Balthazar. Obviously, you’re Dean.” This time Balthazar held out his hand.

Dean shook it. “Yes, I’m Dean.” He pointed behind him. “That’s my brother, Sam.”

Sam held out his hand, which Balthazar also shook. “Pleasure to meet you,” Sam said with a grin. “Castiel has had nothing but nice things to say about you.”

Balthazar smirked. “Well, I am indeed quite impressive. So, I can understand why he would sing my praises.”

Cas rolled his eyes. “Yeah, you’re a regular saint.”

“Aww, now, Cassie, even though you still have that stick up your arse, doesn’t mean you have to be cross with me.”

“I have every right to be pissed with you, Zar,” Cas hissed as he glowered at his cousin.

“You forget, Castiel. I… don’t care,” Balthazar snarked.

Cas rolled his eyes again. “I’m going to go wait in line for popcorn.”

“I’ll come with you,” Dean offered without a second thought.

Castiel blushed and nodded.

“You guys want anything?” Dean asked the group.

After taking snack orders, everyone but Cas and Dean went to find their theater to reserve seats.

Dean nudged Cas as they waited in line. “Excited about the movie?”

Castiel smiled at the ground. “More or less.”

“I’ve heard good things about the movie. It’s probably no Avengers, but I can’t turn down watching a movie with you. It doesn’t feel right watching them without you anymore.”

Cas tilted his head and furrowed his eyebrows at Dean. “How so?”

“Well, for example, I was watching _Babes in Toyland_ yesterday with Sammy, and I couldn’t help but feel like something was missing. That’s kinda why…” Dean paused and took a deep breath. “It’s kinda why I texted you yesterday, to begin with. I… I missed you,” he stuttered.

To say that Dean was shocked by Cas’ next action would have been a vast understatement. Cas laced his left hand with Dean’s right and beamed with glee. “I missed you, too, Dean.”

Dean released a stuttered breath. The slightest touch of Cas’ hand always seemed to set a fire he had no intention of extinguishing. Dean squeezed Cas’ hand then gently rubbed his thumb up and down the length of Cas’ thumb. Holding his hand made Dean’s heart beat faster and yet slower. Something so simple filled him with unimaginable pleasure. However, they were in public. Until Dean was no longer a student teacher at the high school, Ellen warned him that he had to mind his behavior while they were in public. With one final soft squeeze, Dean released Cas’ hand. It broke Dean’s heart when he saw the puzzled expression on Cas’ face.

“I’m so sorry, Cas. You have no idea how much that means to me, but technically, even though you’re home for a medical reason, I am still a student teacher at your school. We talked about this.”

Cas frowned. “I forgot. My apologies.”

“Don’t apologize,” Dean admonished. “My semester is over on December twenty-second. After that, I will no longer have to worry about hiding this.”

“My birthday is on the twenty-third,” Cas divulged.

“Really? December twenty-third?” he asked with a grin.

“Yes,” Cas answered with a nod.

“My band’s first show in fucking forever is that night. Would you… would you want to come?” Dean inquired, worried that Cas would say no.

Cas smiled with excitement. “It would be an honor!”

“Awesome!” Dean exclaimed. “You’ll get to meet my band. They’ll be so excited to hear that you’re coming to the show. They’ve… they’ve heard a lot about you,” he added, his face flushing.

Cas laughed. “I look forward to meeting them.”

Once they were done purchasing everything, they carried their goodies to theater four, where _Justice League_ was about to start airing the previews for upcoming films. _Did that seriously take us almost an hour to get popcorn?_ It took a few moments to locate the others. They were pleased to find they didn’t have to climb too many steps to reach them. Also, a major bonus, they didn’t have to squish past a bunch of strangers before they could sit down.

They handed out everyone’s snack, then took their seats. Dean was thrilled to discover someone in the group arranged for Cas and Dean to sit next to each other. His mind instantly drifted to thoughts of what he had done with different dates in the past. _Hands to yourself in public, man. You just reminded Cas that you’re basically his teacher and could lose your job. Knock it off._ When Dean was finally comfortable in his seat, he grabbed a fist full of popcorn and prepared for a couple of hours of superhero goodness.

Whether they were sitting on Cas’ couch or in a movie theater, Dean enjoyed talking to Cas during the movie. A few aggravated shooshes were hissed out by strangers, and Sam, but Dean couldn’t find it in himself to care. This was their thing, and from what he could tell, Cas didn’t care what everyone else thought either.

About an hour into the film, Dean was starting to lose the battle with his bladder and had to excuse himself to go to the bathroom. One of the major downsides of having to see a movie in a theater was there was no pause button. If someone had to go to the bathroom, they had to expect that they would inevitably miss some pivotal plot points due to their need to take care of their bodily functions.

One of the benefits of the theater their movie was showing it was the bathroom was right across from it. He rushed through the crowd in the hallway only to find that there a huge line to wait for a urinal. _This is the men’s room! Why the fuck is there a line?_ Dean was seconds away from doing a dance to prevent himself from relieving himself in his pants.

“Of course,” someone said behind him. “Why would the toilets be empty on a day like today?”

Dean turned to agree with the guy standing behind him. He was shocked to find Cas’ cousin was the one who had commented. “Yeah, I really gotta go, too.”

“Hmm,” Balthazar uttered with a nod.

Dean faced forward to continue waiting for the next available urinal.

“So, is there a reason why you’re not taking advantage of our current setting?” Balthazar asked. A few of the other people waiting in line gave him dirty looks.

“Um… It’s a bathroom, dude. I use this place for only one reason and get the fuck out.”

“Not the sodding bathroom, you pillock, the theater.”

Dean squinted at Balthazar with bewilderment. _What?_

Balthazar rolled his eyes. “You have fooled around at the cinemas before, yeah?”

His eyes widened. “Dude, we’re in fucking public. Plus, we’re not even close to that point in our relationship or lack thereof at the moment.”

“What the bloody hell do you think I’m telling you to do?!” Balthazar asked, horror-stricken.

“Well, what the hell are you asking me to do, man?”

Balthazar huffed out an exasperated breath. “There is nothing wrong with a bit of light snogging in a darkened theater. The two of you are sitting right next to each other, but you might as well be on different continents.”

“I don’t want to be pushy, Balthazar. I want things to be on his terms. Not mine. It’s called being a gentleman.” A urinal opened up, and Dean darted to it. When he finished, he stepped in front of one of the sinks, applied some soap, and waved his hand under the faucet to dispense some water.

Balthazar stood next to him. “Are you taking a piss?”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “I just did, dude.”

The Englishman laughed. “Sorry, a bit of slang,” he explained. “What I mean is, are you joking? You have met, Castiel, right?”

Dean walked over to one of the hand dryers. “Yeah, I’ve met him,” he said loud enough to be heard over the sound of the blower.

Balthazar took the machine next to Dean. “Then you know he is not one to make a move. You’re going to have to do it for him.”

Dean shook his head. “No. I’m not forcing him to do anything.”

“Ugh,” Balthazar groaned. “Look, you wanker, my poor cousin swore until yesterday that you had lost all interest in him. Castiel doesn’t understand subtle. He needs you to take the initiative and show him that he is most certainly wrong.”

“What… what if he doesn't…”

“Oh, don’t get your knickers in a twist,” Balthazar interjected. “He wants it. Deep down, you know I’m right.”

Dean bowed his head. _What if you’re wrong? I basically just scolded the guy for holding my hand. Who’s to say he won’t push me away if I try._

“Oh, grow a sack, you ponce!”

Dean locked eyes with the brit and glared. “What the fuck have you been calling me?”

Balthazar rolled his eyes. “Bloody moron,” he mumbled, then walked towards the theater doors.

“Hey!” Dean called after Balthazar.

Balthazar ignored Dean as he gripped the handle and swung the door open.

“I said hey!” Dean repeated.

The Englishman faced Dean, keeping the door open. “You did. Twice. Good for you,” he snarked, patting Dean on the shoulder. “Now, are we going to continue watching this mediocre film, or would you rather stand out here chatting a bit more?”

Dean shook his head and glared at Balthazar with abhorrence as he entered the theater and made his way back to their seats. _This guy is a dick._

When he reached his seat, Cas looked up at Dean and smiled sweetly. As soon as he was comfortable, Cas leaned in and whispered. “Did you have fun? You were in there for a bit.”

Dean chuckled. “Oh, loads,” he murmured with evident sarcasm. “Thanks for asking.”

He received a crooked smile in response.

Dean took in his surroundings and realized Balthazar was right. From what he could tell, no one was looking in their direction. There were no lights on in the room, except, of course, the light emanating from the screen. It would be stupid to not to take a chance and see what happens. The thought had occurred to him before the movie started. The conversation they had while they waited in line for popcorn was the only thing that prevented him from doing anything. _Dude may be a dick, but he’s got a point._

The divider between them didn’t have a drink in it. Dean knew from a previous experience that the armrest could indeed be lifted. Thankfully, Cas was not using said armrest either. Dean surveyed the area once more before he made his decision. _Fuck it!_

 

>>>>>>

 

Considering the direction the night could have gone, Castiel was elated to discover that he was worried about nothing. If anything, he overreacted, yet again, when it came to the thought of losing Dean.

Castiel was definitely disappointed when Dean released his hand at concession and reminded him of the conversation they’d had over a month before how they needed to keep their whatever this was a secret. Luckily, Castiel didn’t do what he really wanted to do which was kiss Dean. Castiel was not the biggest fan of public displays of affection. Anytime he would see a couple mauling each other’s faces in public; he would feel completely uncomfortable. However, if he were, to be honest with himself, at that moment, Castiel realized he wanted to be one of those couples. The second their hands touched there was that familiar volt of electricity that shot through him. He knew Dean could feel it, too. It was impossible to ignore the wave of euphoria they both inevitably felt every time they touched.

Words could not describe how happy delighted Castiel was to find that the group had saved two seats for them where they would be sitting next to each other. Right in between Balthazar and Sam.

Dean, as he usually did when they watched movies together, spent the movie talking to Castiel. It obviously annoyed quite a few of the patrons of the theater, including Sam, but the familiarity of the situation was comforting. So, unfortunately for the other guests watching the film with them, he didn’t care. Not in the slightest.

Midway through the film, Dean excused himself to use the restroom. Castiel felt his absence like a weight on his chest. The theater, though it was filled with over one hundred people, including his cousin and his friends, made him feel like he was alone. When Dean was with him, a hole that had been vacant within him for so long finally felt full. As soon as they were apart, that same piece of him was once again missing. _I’ve known him for only three months. Already I can’t imagine a world without him. Knowing him has been some of the happiest moments of my life._ _I never want to lose that._

Not long after Dean left to go to the bathroom, Balthazar followed. When he saw his cousin leave, a part of him wanted to get up and go with him. Since the text message incident, Castiel was concerned that his cousin would try something else. There was nothing preventing Balthazar from doing something reckless and stupid in order for him to get the results he wanted.

As if he wasn’t anxious enough, the state of duress Dean was in when he returned was troubling. It was evident that something had indeed happened in the bathroom to upset him. He tried to make light of whatever had occurred by asking him if he had fun. A question he found Charlie tended to ask him every time he returned from the bathroom. The laugh and the sardonic remark he received definitely soothed some of the tension he was feeling.

Still, Dean was acting strangely. He kept on shifting in his seat and looking around the theater. Castiel tried to pretend as if he didn’t notice how odd his behavior was, but he was concerned that his actions would lead to him getting up and leaving. From the way he was observing his surroundings, Castiel could only assume that is exactly what Dean had planned to do.

Instead, much to Castiel’s surprise, Dean lifted the armrest and hesitantly reached out his hand for Castiel to hold. Without a second thought, Castiel locked their hands together and smiled crookedly at Dean.

Dean’s reciprocating grin was exceptionally bright and shined through the darkness of the theater like the moon during the night.

For a few moments, Castiel thought the evening couldn’t possibly get any better. He felt Dean lean into him like he had done numerous times throughout the film to make snide remarks and sassy comments. Once Castiel mirrored Dean’s movement, instead of an explanation, Castiel received a kiss on the cheek. His face instantly flushed. When he turned to his left, their lips were mere centimeters apart. Dean’s tongue moistened the plump and tempting lips he had been fantasizing about for over a month. _Who are you kidding? Since the moment you saw him you wanted nothing more than to taste those lips at least once. Only to find out one taste of those sinful lips was never going to be enough._

Dean’s hand squeezed Castiel’s forcing him to gaze into Dean’s too green eyes, which in this light were a deep forest green. They were seeking confirmation that what he wanted was okay. Without any further hesitation, Castiel closed the space between them and crushed their lips together. Every single molecule of Castiel’s body started to vibrate. His hand slowly traveled up Dean’s torso to the nape of Dean’s neck. Both of them, without coaxing, deepened the kiss. Dean’s tongue slid into Castiel’s mouth, tasting and teasing him. Their tongues gently massaged one another in a seductive dance. The heady taste of Dean’s mouth forcing him to pull Dean closer. Castiel was close as he could get to Dean without being on his lap. He tilted his head to the right before opening his mouth further, taking more of Dean’s tongue into his mouth. He sucked on its length, pulling one of the most titillating, keening moans out of Dean. He swallowed it fervently with another kiss. It took every ounce of self-control Castiel had left to not climb onto Dean’s lap and straddle him. He wanted to feel the delicious friction of their rock hard erections rubbing together. To feel strong hands grabbing his ass pulling them even closer as he let his body grind along the length of Dean’s cock.

Dean pulled a salacious guttural groan out of Castiel when he gently bit Castiel’s bottom lip and pushed away from him gently.

A wave of lust crashed upon him as he had never felt before. A fervid need for Dean traveled from the crown of his head to the tip of his dick. His brain short-circuited. A long string of _Dean Dean Dean Dean_ was set on repeat in his mind. His hands ran through Dean’s hair at the back of his scalp. He grabbed hold of the short hairs and pulled, breaking their kiss.

Dean moaned wantonly, He chased Castiel’s lips, begging him to once again seal their lips together. Which, of course, Castiel was enthusiastically willing to do. Castiel leaned in once again to consume the delectable taste of Dean’s mouth when someone had cleared their throat.

_I don’t know who the fuck you are, but I wish I could smite you right now!_

Castiel took in the utterly blissed out expression on Dean’s face and let out a muted gasp. _Seriously, fuck you, whoever you are!_

Dean blinked at Castiel with his insanely long lashes. His eyelids were heavy, further contributing to his overall appearance of ecstasy.

_Fuck it and fuck you, random moviegoer!_

Castiel leaned in and took exactly what he wanted. Another heated and soul igniting kiss started to once again reprogram his nervous system. All he craved and needed at that moment was Dean and his tantalizing mouth.

The same person cleared their throat again.

 _Ugh, you retched sack of shit!_ “What?!” Castiel spat as he looked up at the person who had cleared their throat twice now.

His heart stopped when he realized who it was.

 

>>>>>>

 

Dean wished for things he shouldn’t want to happen right there in that theater. His memories didn’t do kissing Cas justice. Considering the fact that he had Cas pegged as someone thoroughly inexperienced when they first met, he definitely knew how to kiss like a porn star. This kiss was penthouse forum material. It had the perfect amount of tongue, and he wasn’t drowning in saliva. Sad to say, the saliva bit was something he experienced more often than not. The best part of the kiss was how Cas sucked him into the kiss. Not to the point where he felt like he was making out with a vacuum cleaner, but enough to where he had trouble catching the breath he no longer cared to take. Especially, if it meant he would lose the feeling of those lips on his.

On more than one occasion, Dean had found himself contemplating murder. He never acted upon it. Even so, whoever the jackass was in the row behind them, who was incessantly clearing his throat, was in grave danger of being Dean’s first victim.

Cas was the one to snap first. He saw just as much violence in Cas’ eyes before he focused that fury on the person who had interrupted them. However, nothing would have prepared either of them for who the asshole was. How they missed him when they entered the theater, how had any of them missed the prick when they selected their seats, was beyond Dean’s comprehension. From what he could tell, Castiel was thinking the same thing.

Alastair and some of his other cronies were sitting in a long line in the row behind them.

“Hello, faggots,” Alastair hissed.

Cas and Dean faced forward. Dean felt his heart beating out of his chest. _This is the perfect spot for him to get at Cas. It’s crowded. No one can peg him; it could be anyone if he attacks._ One look in Cas’ direction and he knew they were thinking the same thing.

Dean elbowed Sam in the ribs, harder than he intended to get his attention.

“Ouch! What the fuck, Dean?!” Sam scream whispered.

“Pass the message. We’re leaving. Now!”

Sam’s face screwed up. “What?! Why?!”

Dean cocked his head in the direction of the row behind him.

Sam’s eyes widened in realization when he saw who was sitting behind them. He gave a single nod and turned to Jo and Charlie.

The conversation Sam was having with Jo and Charlie, by the looks of it, was a lot like the one he had just shared with Sam. Both of the girls stole a glance quickly in the direction of the row behind them. Charlie’s eyes didn’t widen like Sam’s or Jo’s; they narrowed with malice and murderous intent.

_I really like this chick._

Dean turned to his right to see how Cas’ conversation with Balthazar was going. Balthazar wore the same vicious expression Charlie had been wearing only seconds before.

 _Damn… Maybe I should throw this guy a bone._ _If looks could kill._

One by one they all stood up and made there way out of the theater. Dean took the steps down two at a time as he led the group to the emergency exit doors at the bottom of the theater. Everyone kept up with him; no words were exchanged until they were all outside and the door was firmly shut behind them.

“How the hell did he know we were there?!” Jo barked.

“Debit and credit card records,” Charlie supplied. “All you need is a semi-decent hacker, and they can locate transactions. With the information from the purchase, they can determine location, among other things.”

“What the hell is wrong with that guy?!” Sam added.

“He’s a psychopath,” Dean answered.

Cas wore a vacant yet determined expression.

Dean wrapped his arm around Cas’ waist, pulling Cas towards him. “Don’t worry, Cas.”

Castiel shook his head “Let me think,” he said as he picked up the pace and sped up to get to the car, forcing them apart.

As they approached the Impala, Dean noticed the state of his Baby and was ready to rip his hair out. There was what looked like a bucket of red paint thrown all over her. “What the fu…” It only got worse. He stepped to the driver’s side where the word “ **FAGGOT** ” was keyed deep into the metal of his girl. “Oh, MOTHER FUCKER!” he hollered. “WE’RE FUCKING KEYING CARS NOW, AL!” He crouched down, licked his thumb, and hoped against all hope that it wasn’t actually carved into the car. Obviously, it was all for naught; the words were carved in so deep, there was no way his Baby would be fixed by Monday. “Son of a bitch,” he whimpered as his head fell upon the driver’s side door. His hand rubbed over the giant letters. “I’m so sorry, Baby,” he croaked. He stood up and huffed out an enraged breath.

Everyone looked at him with pity. Everyone except Cas. He could meet Dean’s eyes. His arms were wrapped tightly around himself, despair marring his sweet face.

Cas’ sorrowful expression spurred Dean to action. “I’m taking everyone home. Now! Get in the car,” Dean ordered.

“You can drop me off at the Islandia Marriott,” Balthazar stated.

Dean nodded with a grunt of, “Mmm-hmm.”

The car was silent. Dean wasn’t sure if they were afraid to speak, or if it was just the situation that was causing the silence, but he was thankful for it.

It took the normally ten-minute drive to the Islandia Marriott, thirty minutes due to the traffic on Black Friday. Dean got out of the car. He was surprised to see that Cas did not join him. Dean went around the front of the car. “Well, I guess it was nice meeting you,” Dean said as he offered his hand to Balthazar.

Balthazar accepted it. “Take care of him, please. You have no idea…” he paused. His gaze traveled to where he knew his cousin was sitting. He took a deep breath. “You have no idea what that monster has done to him.”

Dean sighed. He closed his eyes momentarily and then opened them before he told Balthazar dejectedly, “Yes, I do.”

Balthazar narrowed his eyes at Dean, entirely baffled by Dean’s knowledge. “He told you?”

Dean shook his head. “No. I, um… I kinda figured it out.”

Balthazar nodded in understanding. “You don’t know all of it, Dean. The crime was not just the sexual assault. It was so much more. Maybe one day he’ll tell you. Until then… Just promise me you’ll be there for him,” he pleaded.

“I don’t want to be anywhere else. I’ll always be there for him,” Dean promised.

The corners of Balthazar’s lips twitched with a smile that almost happened. He smacked Dean on the back. “Well, I’m officially on your team. No matter what Gabriel says, you’re a good man, Dean. Take care of him.” He waved at the passengers in the car, then turned towards the hotel and traipsed to the main entrance.

Dean climbed back into the Impala and pulled out of the parking lot. He brought Jo home first, then Charlie. Dean wanted Charlie to go home with Cas, but Cas insisted Charlie should stay home. After a long and hesitant goodbye, Charlie left the car and went into her house.

When they arrived at Cas’ house, Dean told Sam to wait in the car while he brought Cas inside. Cas unlocked the front door and was ready to say goodbye almost instantly. “Cas, stop,” Dean begged. “Don’t do this. Don’t let him do this to you.”

Cas shook his head vigorously. “Don’t, Dean. Just… Just don’t,” he stuttered, holding back impending tears.

Dean reached out for Cas. “Talk to me, please.”

Becky appeared at the top of the stairs. Balthazar must have called her. She was wearing a face only a mother could. Anguish, concern, rage, and relief all combined into one single expression. She took the stairs two at a time until her arms were wrapped around her son.

Cas gently removed her from him. “Mom, don’t. I just can’t. I can’t.”

Dean’s heart broke at the sight of Cas’ forlorn expression. “Cas,” Dean breathed.

Cas shook his head and made his way down to his room.

Becky’s eyes locked with Dean’s. “What happened?”

_Should I tell her everything?_

Becky’s gaze strayed after her son. The overwhelming misery coming off her in waves answered his question.

“Um, well, we were kissing,” Dean began.

Her head snapped in his direction. Eyes once again meeting Dean’s.

“Someone cleared their throat, twice. At first, we both thought it was some random person. Then… well, obviously, we realized who it really was. We basically just up and left after that.”

She nodded in understanding.

“As you can see,” he pointed at his car, “they vandalized my vehicle…” he took a deep breath. “Cas… he just shut down after that.”

“How much do you know about what happened between the two of them?”

“I know Alastair… he… um, he…” he groaned. “God! It makes me sick just thinking about what he did.”

She swallowed hard with emotion, biting her top lip. “Me, too,” she sobbed. She harshly swiped at her eyes to keep her tears from crying. She cleared his throat. “Did you hear what was apparently Alastair’s final straw? What set him off?”

Dean shook his head. “Not really. I know that it happened around the time of a talent show, he was performing with a friend. What eventually happened took place in the gym’s locker room at the middle school. He… uh… He ended up in the hospital, but that’s about it. Um, I also heard that he bragged about it on the bus. My old bus driver told me all of this.”

“Well, Castiel should be the one to tell you everything if or when he feels comfortable enough to tell you. However, I feel it is important you know that there is only one other person my son has ever shown interest in. The ‘friend’ who was in the auditorium, was that person. They kissed on the piano bench at the school while they were in private rehearsal before the school day started. It was his first kiss. The boy, Aaron, when people talk about what happened, they never mention what happened to him because he and his family left the district after the incident.”

“What happened to him?”

“They assaulted him, too.”

Dean’s jaw dropped. “What?!”

“It wasn’t sexual assault,” she replied. “Not that what they did to him was any better. Aaron suffered severe physical trauma. They severed his spinal cord at his L3 and L4 vertebrae. He’s completely paralyzed from the waist down. As soon as his parents had the capability to move him, they relocated to Pennsylvania. They denied Castiel any further communication with Aaron. Castiel was only informed of his condition. Stable but paralyzed. I have friends who are still in contact with his parents. Apparently, physical therapy has not helped. The damage is too great. He’ll never walk again.”

“Son of a bitch,” Dean muttered. He gritted his teeth in anger. “Did they deny Castiel contact with Aaron because Castiel’s  gay?”

“No. Nothing like that. It would be pretty hypocritical considering their son is also gay,” she replied. “Unfortunately, they blame Castiel,” she shook her head. “Of course, it doesn’t make sense to blame him, but they needed a scapegoat. Especially since no one can ever seem to find anything to nail the prick.”

Dean’s eyebrows raised in surprise.

“I’m sorry,” she apologized when she observed Dean’s expression. “I just… I really hate him.”

“I do, too.” _Understatement of the fucking century._

Becky’s vision drifted once again towards her son’s room.

“You should go to him. He may not want to talk, but he probably needs you,” he said with a doleful expression.

Becky nodded once more. She looked up at Dean and gave him a small smile that did not even come close to meeting her eyes. “Get home safe, Dean. Thank you for bringing my son home to me.”

Dean rocked awkwardly on the balls of his feet then took a deep breath before he decided to speak again. “I know this goes without saying, especially since you’re his mom, but take care of him. He… well,” he lifted his hand to the back of his neck where he rubbed it nervously, “if you haven’t noticed yet, he kinda means the world to me,” he said with a small smile.

She huffed out a single laugh. “Yeah, I noticed,” she confirmed. “And yes, he is my son. I will take care of him.”

He nodded. “Goodnight, Becky.”

“Night, Dean. Thank you again for bringing him home to me.”

“Of course.”

She waved and closed the door as he made his way towards his car to drive home.

He stole one final glance at the house. _Fuck! I don’t want to go home. I should be in there with him._ Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath. _Go home, Winchester. Becky’s got this._

 

>>>>>>

 

It was the eighth grade all over again. Castiel wrapped his arms around his chest trying to hold himself together. Trying to keep his insides from falling out. _Why is he so desperate to ruin me? What did I ever do to him?!_

Nothing could have prepared him for the whiplash of emotions he had experienced that night. It started out with a slight amount of foreboding, but that was mostly due to the fact that he would be seeing Dean for the first time since he had admitted his feelings to him. Earlier, there was some apprehension about how Dean had reacted to finding out how true Balthazar’s texts had really been. However, the result, could not have been any better. The kiss they shared in the movie theater was heavenly. He had completely forgotten about how extraordinary Dean’s lips felt, how soft they were. Balthazar had told Dean he needed to take what he wanted from Castiel. At that moment, Dean wouldn’t have had to worry about taking from Castiel. He was thoroughly capable and willing to give Dean absolutely anything, **anything** , he wanted. Apparently, Castiel wasn’t allowed to want anyone without having the bone-chilling presence of Alastair dousing his feelings with a bucket of ice water.

Castiel needed to escape. Dean, without being asked, knew exactly what Castiel needed. He had to go somewhere he felt relatively safe.   _Alastair is trying to prove to you that there is no place safe. No place I can go where he won’t find me._ The brisk walk to the car was meant to clear Castiel’s head. It was supposed to give him time to think of a plan. Of course, he wasn’t allowed to even do that. Alastair had to add insult to injury by vandalizing Dean’s car. That’s when whatever amount of control he had left over the situation left him. _Alastair can get to Dean… He can hurt him._ Everything shut down.

Even if he tried, Castiel would not be able to recall most of the drive back to his house. He knew there was traffic. It was Black Friday, of course, there was traffic. Balthazar was the first one to be dropped off. He hardly acknowledged his cousin’s farewell. Considering the fact that Balthazar was supposed to be flying home the next morning, he probably should have paid more attention. When they dropped Charlie off, he argued with her. He understood Charlie’s need to be there with him. If he were to be honest with himself, he probably shouldn’t have enforced his need to be alone. He knew better than anyone that the nightmares were about to come back with a vengeance. _Three years of therapy down the tubes._

When Dean pulled in front of his house, he didn’t want to go inside. He knew his mom was going to be there waiting for him. He wasn’t stupid, far from it. The first thing Balthazar probably had done when he got back to his room was he called her. _She’s not going to leave me alone._ Much to his chagrin, Castiel got out of the car and trudged towards the front door. However, once the door was unlocked, all he wanted to do was sprint to his room and hide. Dean, of course, was not having it.

“Cas, stop,” Dean pleaded. “Don’t do this. Don’t let him do this to you.”

 _Please.._. “Don’t, Dean. Just… Just don’t” he stammered, dreading the fact that he could feel tears setting in.

Dean reached out for Cas. “Talk to me, please.”

_Please! Let me leave!_

Castiel heard rather than saw his mom when she had arrived at the top of the stairs. Without looking up, he knew what expression she was wearing. For years she has been making the same face. It wasn’t until he finally locked eyes with her that she rushed down the stairs and wrapped her arms around him

Feeling the warmth of her embrace was only increasing the chance of his tears falling in front of Dean. _I can’t be this way in front of him. I just can’t._ Cas gently removed her. “Mom, don’t. I just can’t. I can’t,” he choked on the words.

“Cas,” Dean uttered, barely above a whisper.

 _No. No! I can’t do this._ He left the two of them without so much as a goodbye in Dean’s direction.

Trying to maintain some semblance of composure, Castiel had made his best attempt to gently open the door and softly close it behind him. He wasn’t sure how successful he had been due to the fact that all he could hear was the sound of his own blood rushing through his veins. Once he felt secure in the privacy of his own room, he let the levee break. Tears did not start to fall instantly like he thought they would. Instead, he began to have a panic attack. He was taking stuttered breaths. The more he tried to steady himself, the worse it would become. Castiel didn’t notice he had hit the floor until his mother walked into the room and rushed to the floor to sit beside him. _Did I faint or something? How did I get down here?_

“Breathe, Castiel! Breathe!” Becky murmured. “Shh. I’m here. I’m here,” she promised over and over as she wrapped her arms tightly around him and started to rub his back. “You’re safe.”

Those final words were what brought the tears. He sobbed into her neck as he curled into his mother on the floor. “I’m never going to be safe, mom,” he barked out without meaning to. His harsh sobbing made it hard for him to control the volume of his voice. “What did I do?! What did I do?! Why?!” he asked without expecting an answer which would actually explain why this monster felt the need to constantly torture him.

“You didn’t do anything, sweetheart. You’ve never done anything to deserve this! He’s a psychopath! This is not your fault!” Becky declared adamantly.

Castiel scoffed, removing himself from his mother’s embrace. He stood up and glared down at her. “I must have done something to warrant this kind of abuse,” he continued to sob. However, he could sense that his tears would soon be taking the back burner as rage began to course through his veins. “He never stops! Alastair promised Dean that he would end me! Tonight he proved he can find me no matter where I am,” he snapped. “I haven’t gone anywhere except Riverhead for Thanksgiving and doctors visits in weeks, **weeks** , mom! The first time I go anywhere, he’s there, watching me. Taunting me.”

“What do you want me to do, Castiel?” she asked, defeated. “I can’t make him stop. No matter how hard your father and I have tried, we can’t put him behind bars. What do you want me to do? I’ll do anything I can to help you.”

“There is nothing you can do!” he replied with conviction. “He will find me. We can’t even move! He’s not going to stop!”

Becky put her head in her hands. “I’m so sorry, Castiel,” she apologized, holding in her tears. She shook her head and then sat up straight putting her long dirty blonde behind her ears. “We should have moved. We should have disappeared like Aaron and his family had. Your father and I have failed you as parents. I’m so sorry.”

“Mom,” Castiel fell to his knees, tears at the brims of his eyes once again, “don’t say that! Never say that!” He wrapped his arms around her. “If you recall, I was part of the reason why we decided not to move. I wanted to stay with my friends.”

Becky removed his arms and held his biceps so she could look him in the eyes while she spoke to him. “Look what us allowing it has cost you! You were in the hospital only three and a half weeks ago. You’ve been home, away from  school where you should be, because you’re still healing from the surgery you needed to have. You’ve stopped playing piano, Castiel. You hardly sing anymore unless you’re at school or watching a movie with Hannah. On top of all that, now you’re even afraid to leave the house because you’re afraid of what he’ll do next! What kind of life is that?! He sucked every bit of happiness out of you. He made you forget yourself, Castiel. What’s worse is he continues to do it. No,” she shook her head, “we should have moved. Your father could have commuted from upstate or New Jersey to the city.”

“You want him to take my friends from me along with everything else he has taken from me,” he admonished. “No. No matter what happens, I’m happy to be here just because of that.”

“Castiel, there was no way on earth that you would have ever lost Charlie or Meg. Charlie has been attached to you at the hip from the moment she met you. And Meg… That girl could care less about anyone else on this earth. But you? She’d die for you without a second guess. You’re her exception.”

“I would hardly ever see them,” he stated.

“With technology nowadays, that is completely unlikely.”

“No,” he shook his head. “I’m happy we stayed here. No matter what, this is my home. Long Island is my home, mom.”

“Not if it costs you your life, Castiel.”

Nothing his mother was saying was making him feel any better. _What do you expect? This asshole has single-handedly made your life miserable for years! He has consistently destroyed you just when you’re nearly done being put back together, more than once._ “I’m tired,” he admitted. “I need to go to bed.”

“Do you want me to get you anything?”

“No. I’m going to take a shower then go to bed.” _I need to wash off the memories of this dreadful evening._

“Okay. I’m here if you need me,” she replied as they both stood up. She gave him one final hug “I love you, sweetheart.”

“I love you, too, mom,” he replied hugging her back.

She gave him the smallest of smiles then left his room.

Castiel grabbed a pair of pajama pants and an old t-shirt and went to the bathroom to take a shower. He brushed his teeth first as he waited for the water to reach the perfect temperature. When he was done brushing, he stepped into the shower and let the powerful stream of blistering heat soothe him. He would have been lying if he told anyone he hadn’t cried as he washed the night's troubles down the drain.

After he dried himself off and got dressed, he padded off to his room and crawled into his bed. He curled into himself and sobbed quietly. _Cut it out! You’re stronger than this! Pull yourself together_. He grabbed a tissue and blew his nose, then tossed the used tissue onto his nightstand. _I’ll throw that out later._ Castiel rolled on to his back and stared at the ceiling. He closed his eyes slowly and huffed out a deep breath. _The night had started out so well._ _I didn’t even get to say go..._

{tap} {tap} {tap}

 

>>>>>>

 

It had been awhile since Dean had a decent temper tantrum. There was not a doubt in Dean’s mind that he was about to have one.

When they arrived back at the house, Dean pulled his baby into the garage. Something, believe it or not, he hardly ever did. Dean sat in the driver’s seat and gripped the steering wheel so tight that his knuckles turned white.

“Dean,” Sam said as he softly touched Dean’s arm.

“What?” Dean barked, instantly regretting his behavior. _He doesn’t deserve that._ He took a deep calming breath. “What, Sam?” he asked.

Sam was wearing his sad puppy dog face. “I was talking to you. I’m guessing you didn’t hear me.”

Dean shook his head. “No. I didn’t.”

“I was just saying things may be rough right now, but they will get better. The two of you will find a way to beat this dick. The Impala may be messed up right now, but you’re an awesome mechanic. It’ll be fixed in no time. Just try to think of the positives.”

Dean glared at Sam. “The positives?! What positives?! What part of what happened tonight with that douche bag is okay?! He told me he would get to Cas! Tonight he showed me just how easy it is for him to keep that promise!”

“We’ll all make sure that nothing happens to him.”

Dean scoffed. _Yeah. Okay._

“You know, there are more people who care about Castiel than just you. We all want to make sure he’s safe. We’ll figure out a way to take care of this prick.”

 _Seriously, Sammy?! You’re smarter than this._ “Yeah? And how’s that?” Dean questioned.

“We’ll figure it out.”

 _There is only one way to keep him safe._ “I’m going to kill him. The only way Cas will ever get away from that dick is when he’s dead.”

“Dean, don’t. He’s not worth it.”

“Cas is not worth it?!” Dean snapped.

“Not Castiel! Alastair is not worth it! He is not worth you throwing your life away, Dean!” Sam barked back.

Dean gritted his teeth. “I know where to find him. I know what to do. I can go there right now if I want.”

“Dean, stop it. Right now!” Sam ordered. “You heard what I said. No matter what you think, you going there right now to try to kill him will do nothing but ruin your life. Ruin everything you’ve worked hard for.”

 _I’ve heard enough of this shit._ Dean climbed out of the car and slammed the door behind him.

Sam was quick to follow. “Dean, listen to me!”

“Listen to you? Look at what he did to my car!” he hollered. “Think of everything he’s done to Cas, what he’s still doing! He’s done a lot more than that. I should know! I spent the summer with the asshole!” Dean picked up a wrench from one of the workbenches and pelted it at the wall. Dean didn’t see the damage the wrench had caused, but he definitely heard it. “He won’t stop, Sam. Not until he’s dead!”

“You killing him is not going to do anything but make everything worse! Think about it, Dean. Alastair has gotten away with assault, rape, drug dealing, money laundering, and God knows what else. Do you seriously think you could ever get away with killing him without there being consequences?”

Dean took a deep breath. “What the hell am I supposed to do, Sam? I can’t just sit back and let him continue what he’s doing. I can’t just…” His fury continued to build and build until he was ready to explode.

“Dean.”

“No!” Dean yelled. “No! I can’t let him keep doing this!” Dean picked up a tire iron and chucked it like a throwing star. It went through one of the windows of the garage. “Son of a BITCH!”

Dean put his hands on his head. He ran his hands back and forth on his scalp and then grabbed his hair. _I can’t be here anymore._ Dean approached the Impala. For a brief moment, he had almost forgotten what Alastair did to her. _Oh, Baby, I’m so sorry._ He stomped away from the Impala to the side door and swung it open so hard it slammed against the garage wall. He barged out of the garage and started to walk down the driveway towards the street.

“Dean!” Sam called after him.

“Leave me alone, Sam!” he bellowed.

“Where are you going?”

Dean didn’t answer and just kept walking.

He was happy to find that Sam didn’t follow him. Dean had no idea where he was going. There was a 7-11 up the street and the Shell gas station, but he had absolutely no interest  in going to either one of them. Instead of making a decision, he just headed in the general direction of both of those destinations. However, his feet didn’t carry him there. He took the overpass to cross over the train tracks to Easton Street. Before he knew it, he was opening a gate and heading to one of the back windows.

{tap} {tap} {tap}

He waited a minute or two before he tapped it again.

The back door opened and Cas appeared with a nine-iron ready to strike. When he saw it was Dean, the golf club slid through his hands until it hit the concrete of the stoop. “Dean?” he asked with a perplexed expression before he looked around the backyard. “What are you doing here?”

“Well, to tell you the truth, I was pissed off about how shit went down tonight and just started walking. I had no idea where I was really going at first until I found myself approaching the overpass.”

Cas was shivering from the cold. He wasn’t wearing shoes and he only had a pair of pajama pants and what looked like a well-loved Metallica t-shirt.

 _Just when I thought I couldn’t like this guy anymore, he wears that._ “Cas, you’re freezing. Can we go inside and talk?”

Cas nodded without hesitation. He bent forward to pick up the golf club then walked through the doorway into the house.

Dean followed him inside and softly closed the door behind him then locked and bolted it. He entered Cas’ room and saw Cas slipping on a sweatshirt. “Where did you put the golf club?”

“Under my bed. I started keeping it there after the first time Ala…” he paused and didn’t continue. Cas sat down at the edge of his bed. “Well, you wanted to talk to me about something,” Cas said as he nervously knotted his fingers together. Refusing to look Dean in the eyes.

“Are you okay?”

Cas scoffed.

“Yeah... Sorry. Stupid question.”

“What do you want, Dean?” Cas asked as he ran a hand through his unruly hair.

Dean sighed. “I hated the way things ended tonight. You shut down and I couldn’t get through to you.”

“I have my reasons,” Cas mumbled.

“I know,” Dean answered.

Cas glanced up at Dean as he squinted. His eyebrows furrowed. “You know? You have no idea what I’m feeling. You have no idea how horrifying this all is. He found where I was and watched us the entire night, Dean. He saw me k…” he shook his head cutting his thought short. “He vandalized your car! Your Baby! The car you spent hours refurbishing!”

“I can fix my car.”

“That’s not the point,” he said as he bowed his head.

“Then what is the point, Cas? Do you think this crap is going to chase me away or some shit? I think it should be clear to you by now that I’m not going anywhere.”

“Don’t make promises that you can’t keep, Dean,” Cas grumbled.

“I’m not Aaron. I won’t leave you. No matter what.”

Cas’ eyes narrowed at Dean. “If you know about Aaron, then you know what Alastair had done to him. Don’t think for one second Alastair won’t do the same thing to you or worse!”

“He won’t hurt me.”

“Don’t be naive. He doesn’t care about anyone but himself. Don’t risk your life for me, Dean. I’m not worth your life,” Cas muttered.

“Bullshit, you’re not!” Dean snapped. “Do you seriously think that little of yourself?!”

“Look, Dean, I’m trying to save you from what Alastair will inevitably do to you. You should stay away from me. We shouldn’t even bother with any of this if it puts you in harm's way.”

Dean’s heart plummeted to the pit his stomach. _No. Not this bullshit again. I’m not losing him. I’m not letting Alastair take him from me._ “Stop it. I’m not some damsel in distress, Cas. I don’t need you saving me,” Dean chastised.

Cas narrowed his eyes at Dean. “What? You don’t think you deserve to be saved?” he asked with obvious annoyance. His eyes suddenly widened in realization. “You seriously don’t? Then you’re just as bad as I am.”

“You’re worth the risks. You’re worth a whole fucking lot to me, Cas,” Dean admitted.

Cas bowed his head again. “You can do better than me.”

“No. I can’t.”

Cas released a humorless chuckle. “Yeah, if you say so,” he mumbled sarcastically.

Dean huffed out a breath in utter disbelief. “You seriously don’t know how remarkable you are? How awe-inspiring? You mean the world to me.”

“I don’t know why.”

 _Enough of this crap!_ Dean knelt down in front of Cas and held Cas’ head in his hands. “I’ve wanted you since the moment I met you, but you already know that. What you don’t know is now that I know you, it’s more than that. I **need** you, Castiel. I need your sarcastic comments and your too fucking blue eyes smiling at me when I say something you think is stupid. I need to argue with you, to be near you, to… Oh, fuck it!”

Dean collided their lips together. He needed Cas to see, to feel, to know everything that he did. Every emotion Dean had ever felt for Cas was present in his kiss.

At first, Cas was frozen. He sucked in a short breath through his nose in surprise. However, after a few moments, Cas raised his hand to the back of Dean’s head and kissed him back with a passionate need.

Dean ran his tongue along the seam of Cas’ mouth and was admitted instant access to the intoxicating splendor of Cas’ mouth. Dean licked into Cas’ mouth and massaged his tongue with his. The heady taste of Cas’ mouth spurred him forward as Cas started to lead them on to his bed.

Being kissed by Cas was stupefying. Just when he thought the kiss couldn’t get better, Cas would pull Dean closer to him and show him how wrong he was. If the way Cas sucked on Dean’s tongue was any indication of how Cas would take his cock, he knew he would never last in that tantalizing mouth. The thought made Dean utter a guttural moan that Cas silenced by pulling Dean impossibly closer and kissing him deeply.

Before long Dean found himself in between Castiel’s thighs trying not to dry hump Cas into the bed. Apparently, Cas had a different plan in mind. He flipped Dean onto his back and straddled him.

 _Holy fuck, that was fucking sexy as hell!_ With heavy breaths, Dean tried to speak. “You’re still… hurt. Watch… what…”

Cas tore off his sweatshirt then leaned forward to shut Dean up with another kiss. Cas took control of the kiss. He nibbled gently on Dean’s bottom lip before his tongue once again plunged into Dean’s mouth. Dean’s hands fell to Cas’ waist. He didn’t expect this action to cause Cas to grind down against him then rock his hips back and forth. Dean groaned with unadulterated pleasure. He couldn’t remember his dick ever being this hard. The way Cas slowly rubbed his ass against him was nothing short of delicious. Dean growled as he abandoned all self-control. He thrust up as Cas rutted up against him. He almost saw stars when his rock hard erection rubbed against Cas’ equally hard cock. Cas released a salacious moan as he reveled in the damn near filthy sounds they were making from the breathtaking friction.     

“Ah, fuck, Cas! Please,” Dean whined.

Cas’ head fell into the crook of Dean’s neck. At first, there was nothing but heated short breaths against his clavicle until Cas grabbed the hair at the top of Dean’s head exposing his throat. Dean whimpered as Cas proceeded to nip and lick a line up to Dean’s ear. He sucked and then bit at the lobe before Cas asked, “Is this what you want?” barely above a whisper as he continued to rut up against Dean. “I know it’s what I’ve wanted since we kissed at the theater.”

Dean could hardly breathe, let alone speak. “Cas, fuck! You’re driving me crazy.”

“I thought about moving above you just like this. I thought about your strong hands grabbing me.” He took Dean’s hands from his hips and moved them to the globes of his ass then groaned. “Fuck! Just like that.”

“Cas,” Dean breathed, “please!”

Cas picked up the pace, his hips grinding back and forth over Dean’s crotch.

“Fuck!” Dean could feel the crease of Cas toned ass. He bit his lips to stave off his impending orgasm. Dean never hated his clothing as much as he did at the moment. The next time Cas rocked his hips back, Dean thrust up without meaning to.

“Oh, shit!” Cas hissed in pleasure. Cas bit and then sucked a mark on Dean’s neck before his hot mouth once again engulfed Dean’s. Cas sucked on his tongue and then plunged in deeper, taking what little breath Dean still had away from him.

They moved together until Dean was ready to explode.

Cas broke away from what Dean would definitely consider one of the raunchiest kisses of his life, then his forehead fell on to Dean’s. They shared short hiccuped breaths. When he spoke his voice was completely wrecked. “Dean, are you going to cum?”

Dean nodded vigorously as their eyes met. Cas’ usually sapphire eyes were the color of onyx.

Cas’ movements started to become erratic. “I’m so close,”

Dean was never really into holding someone’s gaze when they were in the throes of passion, but for some reason, he couldn’t take his eyes off of the man who was coming undone above him.

Cas licked his lips, leaving them glistening wet. “I’m gonna cum. Cum with me, Dean.”

With Cas’ demand, Dean went off like a rocket as he squeezed the firm globes of Cas’ ass hard. His body locked up as he came, spilling into his jeans. He bit his bottom lip in a frivolous attempt to control the sound of his climax.

True to Cas’ word, Cas came at the same time Dean did. He continued to rock his hips back and forth, using the mind-blowing friction to stroke them through their orgasms. Cas collapsed on Dean’s chest when Dean started to whimper from the over sensitivity of his now spent dick.

Once their breathing had evened out a bit, Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and kissed his cheek. “Not that I’m complaining, but where the fuck did that just come from?”

Cas moaned. “Mmmm… That was unexpected and extremely pleasant.”

_Fuck! You’re telling me!_

Dean was brought out of his euphoric state when he felt Cas’ chest rumble with his laughter.

“What’s so funny?”

Blue eyes smiled at him. “I came in my pants.”

Dean cocked an eyebrow at Cas. “And that’s funny?”

“Kind of. Especially, since you did too and don’t have a change of pants,” he replied, his grin grew wider.

Dean laughed. “Speaking of which, do you have something I can borrow?” he asked. He could feel his cum seeping further into his jeans and skin. “I need to clean myself up first.”

Cas gave Dean a quick peck. “Give me a second. I’ll grab everything.”

Dean smiled as Cas rolled off of his chest and strutted over to his walk-in closet. In less than a minute, Cas showed up with a pair of sweatpants and a package of wipes. He placed both of the items on the bed.

Dean snickered. “Why do you have wipes in your closet?”

Cas’ eyebrows furrowed with bemusement. “I masturbate. Tissues only clean up so much.” Cas brought over his trash can, then grabbed a few wipes. He turned to walk into the closet.

“Where are you going?” Dean asked.

“I need to change my pants and clean up as well,” he replied as if the answer should have been obvious.

“Oh, um, yeah. Sorry. Carry on,” Dean responded. _That’s weird, right?_ He literally had no idea why Cas felt the need to change in the closet.

“Dean, this is all new to me. I…” he paused to sigh. “Well, I’ve never done that, what we just did, before. Not that I’m not curious, but I don’t think I’m ready to see all of you just yet,” Cas explained as if he could read Dean’s mind.

Dean nodded in understanding. “I get it,” he pointed at the closet. “Do what you gotta do. Knock first before you come out cause I got,” he motioned his hand around his crotch, “stuff to take care of, too.”

Cas shot Dean a crooked smile. “Certainly.”

When the knock came from inside the closet, Dean was already done and waiting for on Cas’ bed. He had already made himself comfortable. His boots were off and sitting near Cas’ desk on the floor along with his cum stained jeans and boxers.

Cas walked out and sat down at the foot of the bed.

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Um, is there a reason you’re sitting all the way over there?”

He could tell that Cas was blushing by the color of his ears.

“What’s up, Cas?”

“Do you… I mean… You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I’m sure you want don’t want to be here. I was just wondering if maybe... if you want...” Cas fumbled over his words in the most adorable way.

Dean smirked. “Get it out, Cas.” He already knew the question and his answer, he just wanted Cas to ask it.

“Would you mind staying the night?”

“I wasn’t really planning on leaving anytime soon, Cas. So, if you want me here,” Dean said with a smile.

Cas eyebrows shot up to the ceiling in shock. “Really?”

Dean shrugged. “Why not? I’m already comfy.”

The smile that spread across Cas’ face could outshine the sun. “Great!” he exclaimed. He shot up from the foot of the bed and locked his bedroom door.

“Planning on taking advantage of me again, Cas?” Dean asked with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle.

Cas’ cheeks flushed. “Well, I… um… I kind of snuck you in. Without permission. I don’t want anyone to know you’re here.”

Dean chuckled. “What? Are you going to throw me in the closet if someone tries to come in or something?”

Cas blushed further.

“Really, Cas?” he laughed.

“Shut up,” he grumbled then climbed over Dean and got comfortable. He handed Dean his TV remote. “Pick a movie.”

“Yes, sir, you rebel you.”

Cas rolled his eyes. “Just pick a movie, Dean.”

After deciding on the movie _Shrek_ , Cas curled up next to Dean.

Nothing could ever compare to this. Dean started to feel infinitely more comfortable. He wrapped his arm around Cas who instantly laid his head on Dean’s chest. Dean leaned forward and kissed the top of his head.

Cas looked up, eyes smiling brightly, then pursed his lips asking for a kiss.

Dean giggled like a weirdo because that was too cute for words then gave Cas the kiss he was looking for.

When Shrek and Donkey were heading to the dragon’s keep, Cas pulled the comforter over them and nuzzled into Dean’s side a bit further.

Before long, Dean fell asleep with a grin on his face listening to Cas’ steady sleeping breaths.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had way too much fun with the British slang. Zar ended up sounding more like Spike than Balthazar. I couldn't help it.


	35. Chapter Thirty-Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning for the beginning of this chapter! Cas' nightmares are back.

A sparkling smile covered Castiel’s face as he looked at the young man in the mirror. His day couldn’t have gone any better if he’d tried. Castiel had kissed the boy he had liked for so long he was sure he would have gone insane if nothing ever happened between them. Castiel couldn’t wait to tell everyone about what had happened by the piano during rehearsal that morning. His grin grew wider as he thought about their plans to go for ice cream at Carvel after the talent show on Friday.

The lights flickered and then went out in the locker room bathrooms.  _ I’m not running that late am I? _ He bent down to pick up his cell phone and looked at the clock.  _ 2:35? I’m not supposed to see Ms. Moseley for another ten minutes. Why is Gordon shutting off the lights already? I told him I needed a little extra time today. _

Steam from the hot water pouring out of the faucet continued to rise as Castiel gargled the hot water in the back of his throat. He wanted to make sure his vocal cords were limber for what was bound to be a strenuous lesson.  _ Better make this quick if he’s already shutting things off,  _ he thought with a shrug.

Quiet chuckles, which could only be described as dark and mischievous, started to fill the main locker room.

Castiel spat the water he had been gargling into the sink. “Hello?” he called.

No answer.

_ Maybe I’m imagining it _ .

The mirror was now covered with steam. He laughed silently.  _ I love when it does that _ . He drew a smiley face with his pointer finger onto the mirror. In the lines of his drawing, he saw the shadow of some standing behind him. He instantly recognized the blonde hair and bright blue eyes of the person who was smiling at him.

Castiel turned around, his head tilted to the right in mild curiosity. “Brady? What are you doing in here?”

Brady’s smirk only grew wider. Apparently, he didn’t plan on answering his question.

Castiel’s eyes searched the area in panic. His heart was racing. Nothing good could come from this.

The same quiet chuckles rang through the locker room. Only this time they were closer.

Lucas Azazel and Joseph Ramiel appeared at the entrance to the bathroom. The same grim sickening smile Brady was wearing painted their faces.

Castiel backed up as far as he could until he was up against the wall.  _ Not a good idea. What are they doing here? _

The ringleader appeared , h is eyes filled with malice, his grin devious.

“Alastair?” Castiel asked. Conflicting emotions filled his gut.  _ Why is he looking at me like that? He’s never been anything but kind to me,  _ the naive part of him thought. His instincts were screaming,  _ RUN! _

“Hello, Castiel,” Alastair’s snake-like voice greeted with a vengeful undertone. “I’m very disappointed in you. I was under the impression that we had an agreement. You’ve betrayed me, Castiel.”

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed. The statement left him perplexed. “What? I don’t understand?”

Alastair tsked. “Don’t play the fool with me, Castiel. It’s far from an attractive quality.”

Azazel and Ramiel began to hit the buttons to all of the hand dryers in the room.

Castiel started to panic. His heart was pounding in his chest. Castiel had no idea what Alastair meant, but there was not a doubt in his mind that the hand dryers were intended to mask the sounds of his screaming from whatever was about to happen.

Alastair approached Castiel like a lion stalking its prey.

An insane part of Castiel still hoped this was all some sort of joke , s ome prank that Alastair was playing.  _ He’s my friend… _ That was the last time those words would ever cross his mind when it came to Alastair.

When Alastair was an inch away from Castiel’s chest, he raised his hand and ghosted a touch from Castiel’s clavicle to his belly button. “Oh, Castiel, you had me fooled. Convinced. You’ll be paying dearly for that.”

Castiel’s chest was rising and falling with terrified hiccuped breaths. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. What did I do?”

All breath left him as a punch with the strength of a battering ram slammed into Castiel’s stomach. He crumbled to the floor, winded by the assault to his solar plexus, curling into himself.

Brady and Alastair ripped him up off of the ground and dragged him into the accessible stall as the others kept the hand dryers running. His body was then thrown to the ground as Alastair locked the stall door behind him.

Some of Castiel’s strength came back to him as he tried to lift himself off the ground.

The small sign of strength was kicked out of him as Alastair stomped his boot into Castiel’s sternum.

Castiel fell back, the back of his head hit the tile with a harsh thwack. His vision went black.

When he came to, Castiel was face down. His pants were being torn off. “No! No! Please!” he begged as he tried to fight his assailant.

“Don’t fight me, faggot! You’re getting what you deserve!”

Castiel screamed at the top of his lungs. He tried to crawl away from the person who had succeeded in pulling off his pants.

Alastair once again stomped on Castiel, this time on his spine. As soon as Castiel was flat on the ground, Alastair straddled his back and slammed his face into the floor. “Don’t fight me, you little bitch,” he hissed. He draped his body over Castiel’s back and whispered, “I want to savor this.”

“Stop! Please!” he hollered.

A belt circled his neck. He felt the bite of the buckle at the back of his neck as the leather began to dig into his trachea, cutting off his air supply.

“Stop! I can’t breathe!” he choked, clawing at his throat.

A muffled voice was screaming in the distance. Castiel couldn’t make it out.

Alastair released a groan of complete ecstasy as Castiel continued to gag. “You’ll always be mine.”

The voice came through a little clearer into his consciousness. “Angel, please! He’s not here! It’s just you and me!”

Castiel woke up gasping for air. Strong arms were holding him tight and cradling his head against the warmth of a muscular chest.

Dean was petting the back of Castiel’s head and dropping soft kisses on the top. “Take a deep breath. It was only a nightmare.”

It was hard to believe that what Castiel had was just a nightmare. The dream was so vivid as if he were experiencing what happened all over again. The taste of blood was on his tongue from his broken nose and split lip.  _ If it was only a nightmare _ _ , _ _ then why is he tormenting me during my waking hours? _ He grabbed the collar of Dean’s shirt and started to cry in earnest into Dean’s chest.

“Shhh. It’s okay,” Dean promised. “Everything will be okay.”

Dean held Castiel closely. He kissed the top of Castiel’s head and rubbed soothing circles onto his back as he continued to whisper a calming and constant stream of  “Shhh, It’s okay. I’m here.”

After a few minutes, Cas’ sobs turned into sniffles and deep breaths. “I’m so sorry,” Castiel croaked , t he sound of his voice muffled by Dean’s chest.

“Why are you sorry?”

“I woke you up.”

“Cas, look at me,” Dean demanded.

Even in the almost complete darkness of the bedroom, Castiel could see nothing but affection in Dean’s eyes.

Dean cupped Castiel’s face and rubbed his thumb across Castiel’s cheekbone, wiping away a few of his tears. “I’m happy I’m here. I don’t give a fuck if you woke me up.”

Cas leaned into Dean’s touch. He covered Dean’s hand with one of his own. “You shouldn’t lose sleep because of me.”

A tiny smile lit up Dean’s face. “Little late in the game, don’t ya think?”

“What do you mean?”

Dean uttered a humorless chuckle. “I’ve been losing sleep over you since the first week I met you. I’m pretty sure that goes both ways. Am I right?”

Cas blushed and buried his face back into Dean’s chest.  _ No… why would I ever do that? _

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

A muffled, “Shut up,” was all Castiel uttered in response to Dean’s question.

Dean once again kissed the top of Castiel’s head.

Just like the night before, Castiel tilted his head up and pursed his lips for a kiss.

“Not to embarrass you or anything, Cas, but that is the most adorable thing I have ever seen,” he beamed and gave Castiel a swift peck on the lips.

Surprisingly, Castiel did not blush at Dean’s comment. Instead, he smiled softly up at Dean. “Thank you, Dean.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “For what?”

“For being here. For being you.”

Dean’s face flushed a rosy pink. “I told you I’m not going anywhere.”

Castiel’s lips met Dean’s for a lingering kiss. There was no heat behind it. Castiel was merely seeking comfort which, from what he could tell, Dean was happy to give.

When their lips separated, Castiel breathed, “I know,” against Dean’s lips.

After one final kiss, Castiel and Dean made themselves comfortable. He rested his head against Dean’s chest and listened to the steady heartbeat of the man who was making him feel safe for the first time in ages. Even so, Castiel couldn’t help but be fearful of how quickly he was developing feelings far more powerful than affection for Dean. As he breathed in the intoxicating smell of Dean , he knew that he wanted to spend every night falling asleep to the scent of motor oil, bruised leather, apple pie, and every other distinct fragrance that came with being so close to Dean.

Once again, Castiel began to breathe evenly. The promise of more sleep was fast approaching.

Another gentle kiss was placed at the top of Castiel’s head. In a voice barely above a whisper, Dean promised, “Alastair won’t hurt you. I won’t let him. Never again _. _ ”

Castiel was swept away into a peaceful slumber with the comfort and protection of Dean’s arms surrounding him.

 

>>>>>>

 

Morning came without warning. A persistent knocking was coming from the door next to him.  _ Ugh… Go away, Sammy. Five more minutes. _

“Castiel, sweetie, it’s time to get up. I made blueberry pancakes. Your favorite,” Becky said as she continued knocking on Cas’ door.

Suddenly, Dean’s morning grew vastly brighter. He smiled down at the mess of brown hair nuzzling into his chest. A warmth filled him, unlike anything he had ever felt. He leaned down and kissed Cas’ forehead.

Cas groaned as he opened his brilliant blue eyes. “Ugh,” he uttered as he sat up and stretched.

Dean quickly followed Castiel’s example and stretched while he yawned.

After Cas rubbed his eyes to rid himself of some of his lingering sleepiness, he locked eyes with Dean.

The same overwhelming warmth continued to spread throughout his entire body. From the crown of his head to the tips of his toes he was completely submerged in the knowledge that if every morning were spent precisely like this, he would never feel empty or alone again. When Castiel’s luminous blue eyes finally began to smile at Dean, he knew with absolute certainty Castiel was it for him. No one else had or would ever make him feel the way Cas did. He tried not to let that information terrify him as he mouthed “ **Good morning** ,” to the bewitching man sitting next to him.

Castiel glared at the door. “Okay, mom. I’ll be right up.”

“Okay,” she replied.

Dean could hear Becky’s smile.  _ She made him pancakes? That is so awesome! I could really go for some pancake myself. Unfortunately, there will be no pancakes for me. My morning will be spent in a closet or walking home _ . He hated the idea of leaving Castiel, but if he was going to be spending the morning upstairs with his family, it was probably for the best if Dean just went home.

“There’s plenty for you, too, Dean.”

Dean’s heart stopped as his eyes widened in horror.  _ Oh, shit!  _ “Uh, thanks… Becky,” he stammered.

Cas’ head fell into his hands.

_ This can’t be good. _

“See you boys upstairs in five,” Becky said with a hint of a warning that clearly stated that it indeed better be only five minutes, then walked away.

Dean shook his head as his entire body started to shake with muted laughter. “So much for throwing me in the closet, huh, Cas?”

Cas, in a very Charlie like manner, punched Dean in the arm.

Dean grabbed his arm but continued to chuckle. “What?! That’s fucking hilarious.”  _ And terrifying, but if I weren’t laughing, I’d be panicking. _

“No, it’s not, Dean,” Cas chastised, Sam-Esque bitch face covering his face. “How did she know you were here?” he asked. His eyes grew wider. “Oh, my God! What if she heard us last night?! What if she…” Cas’ head fell back into his hands. “Oh, fuck my life.”

Dean placed a kiss on Cas’ cheek where his hand wasn’t covering it. “It’ll be okay, angel. Let’s go upstairs.”

As Dean got out of the bed, he started to stretch again.  _ God, I slept like the dead. I wonder if his mattress is memory foam. It fucking molded to my body. _ Just before he was about to ask Cas if his assumption about the mattress was correct, he noticed Cas was wearing his signature puzzled expression

“What?” Dean asked

“Angel?”

Dean blushed.  _ God dammit, Dean! _ “Uh, yeah… You’re named after an angel, and you’re kinda…” his face flushed a deeper crimson as he delayed his answer with a cough.  _ This is embarrassing as fuck. _ “Um, can I not explain my pet name? I just like it. Okay?”

The smile that spread across Cas’ face was glorious and laid all of Dean’s worries about the pet name to rest. Dean knew if Cas tried to grin any wider the skin at the corner of his mouth would rip. Cas hopped out of bed, wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck, and planted a sweet kiss on his lips.

As Dean slowly opened his eyes, the same face-splitting grin that Cas was wearing spread across his face. “Awesome!”

Castiel beamed. “Well, let’s go upstairs. This is bound to be interesting.”

Dean leaned in to give Cas one final lingering kiss before they went upstairs. Compared to the other kisses of the morning, this one was far more daring and heated. Dean wanted more than just a peck or tender lip lock. Truthfully, Dean wanted to coax the same kiss as they had shared in the movie theater, and on Cas’ bed the night before, out of Cas.

Cas put his hand on Dean’s chest and gently pushed him away. “No,” Cas said, trying to catch his breath. “Trust me when I say, when my mom says five minutes, she means five minutes. If you kiss me like that, I won’t leave the room until we finish it.”

“And that’s a bad thing?” Dean asked as he cocked an eyebrow at Castiel.

Cas bitch face was answer enough

Dean licked his lips.  _ Touché.  _ “Yeah, your mom is kinda scary. We should probably go upstairs,” he agreed as he held out his hand.

Cas accepted Dean’s proffered hand with a coy smile. “Great! Let’s go.”

Dean led the way but stopped dead in his tracks at the door. He pointed his finger at Cas’ face. “We’re finishing that later.”

Cas snickered. “Of course, Dean. However, as you well know, for almost a month now, there is a little girl upstairs who absolutely adores you. She will gladly fight for your affection if she has to.”

His finger fell along with his face. “Oh, yeah… Would you mind if we hang out with her for a bit? I don’t want to be a dick to the kid.”

Castiel gave Dean a crooked smile. “You’re asking me if I mind you being okay with spending time with my little sister?” he asked then chuckled. “You’re incredible, did you know that?”

Dean felt his face flush. “Well, you’re pretty fucking awesome, too, Cas,” he replied with a wink.

Cas rolled his eyes. “Come on, handsome. Let’s go upstairs. We’ve been down here well over five minutes now.”

Dean kissed Cas’ hand. “Breakfast awaits. I’m fucking starving,” he declared. His stomach started to growl thus proving how hungry he really was.

“Let’s get you fed.”

When they made it to the top of the stairs, Cas released Dean’s hand and walked into the kitchen first with Dean close behind him.

Hannah was bobbing her head back and forth as she enjoyed her latest bite of pancake. The moment she saw Dean her eyes lit up. “DEAN!!!!” she exclaimed as she jumped out of her chair and darted towards him. She jumped into his arms and wrapped hers around his neck as he picked her up.

Hannah hugged him tightly. “I missed you!”

“Missed you, too, sweetheart,” Dean replied.  _ Seriously not a lie. I kinda adore this kid. _ He hugged her back as he carried her over to the table.

While Dean held her in his arms, Hannah’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Why are you here so early? Castiel says you work Saturdays. That’s why you never watch movies with us early today.”

“Well, the shop is closed this weekend because of the holiday. So, I came here this morning to spend time with you guys and, uh, have breakfast,” he explained.

Castiel laughed.

_ Yeah, I know, smooth... _

“Dean? You got a boo-boo.” Hannah pointed out as she softly traced a finger over something on his neck.

Dean peered down at himself to see what Hannah was looking at. He failed miserably in his attempt. It took Dean a second to realize what Hannah was referring to.  _ Oh, shit… Cas gave me a fucking hickey last night.  _ Dean blushed. “Oh, um, giant squid attack. I won, so don’t worry.”

“Okay,” she smiled as Dean placed her back in her chair.

_ Thank God she’s not pushing the issue. How the fuck do you explain to a five-year-old something like this. You can’t just say, “Uh, yeah, kid. You see, your brother and I made out last night. He got kind of carried away and then sucked a mark onto my neck.” _

Dean could tell that Cas was probably thinking about the same thing when he saw him smile. However, after a few moments, he watched as a frown took the smiles place.

You okay, Cas?” he asked , h is fingers lacing with Cas’ underneath the table.

Cas shook his head as if he were trying to clear it and smiled without it meeting his eyes. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

_ Bullshit, Cas _ .

Cas leaned into Dean’s side to whisper in his ear. “Are you my boyfriend?”

Butterflies started to flutter in his chest. “If you want me to be,” Dean replied, also whispering.  _ Please be a yes! _

Castiel smiled like a fool and nodded his head emphatically.

Dean shrugged. “Then I guess I am,” he answered at an average volume.

“You’re what, Dean?” Becky asked as she dropped plates of pancakes in front of Dean and Castiel.

_ Shit. You should have whispered that, too. She’s probably not your biggest fan right now.  _ “Um, well,” he started nervously. “I’m Castiel’s boyfriend.” _. _

Hannah’s expression was somewhere between elation and what Dean could only imagine was either jealousy or disappointment.  _ Sorry, kid. One, you’re  _ **_way_ ** _ too young for me. Two, it was and always will be Cas, sweetheart. _

Becky sat down with her own plate and poured blueberry syrup on top of her pancakes. “Hmm, you like to state the obvious often?” she questioned as she cut her pancakes with her fork and took a bite.

“Mom,” Castiel whined.

“What?” Becky asked. She covered her mouth as she spoke. Once she swallowed her bite , she pointed her fork between the both of them. “Anyone with eyes and ears can tell that you two are an item,” she explained. Becky put her fork down and clapped her hands together. “Speaking of ears,” she began, “neither of you is quiet, and that door shuts with a bang,” she mentioned. She focused her glare on Dean. “Don’t try to pull that crud again, Dean.”

Dean swallowed hard and bowed his head.  _ Fuck, she did hear us. _

“It was my fault, mom,” Castiel interjected. “I asked him to stay.”

“Hannah, go check on what’s taking your father so long to come out here,” Becky asked her daughter.

Hannah’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “But, mama! I’m not finished.”

“I’m not saying you can’t finish your breakfast, sweetie. I just need you to go check on your dad; then you can come right back.”

Hannah rolled her eyes and huffed, “Fine!”

As soon as Hannah had stomped off in the direction of wherever Castiel’s father was and clearly out of earshot, Becky turned her attention back to the both of them. “Start talking,” she hissed.

Castiel spoke before Dean had a chance to respond. “Dean stayed the night because I asked him to.”

“Uh-huh… Did you invite Dean over?” Becky asked as she leaned back in her chair, her arms crossed over her chest.

_ She’s not going to like my answer. _ “No, ma’am,” Dean supplied. “I came over to check up on him. I was worried about him.”

“Okay. And anyone care to explain to me why no one thought to ask me whether or not Dean could spend the night?” She questioned. Her volume was growing with irritation.

“That is also my fault, mom. I told him that I snuck him in without permission and I preferred if no one knew he was there because I didn’t want you to send him home. I needed him to stay with me. He makes me feel safe, mom,” Castiel explained.

Dean’s heart started to pound in his chest from both the anxiety of the situation and the knowledge that Cas felt safe with him. All he thought about the night before when he was awakened by Cas’ blood-curdling scream, was how desperately he wanted Cas to feel secure in his arms , f or him to know that Dean would protect him no matter happened.

Becky leaned forward, put her elbows on the table, then her head fell into her hands. She shook her head a bit before she ran her fingers through her long hair and put it behind her ears. “Look, I’m not happy you lied to me. You should have told me last night and explained yourself like you just did, I would have told you he could stay in the guest room. Still,” she focused her attention on Dean, “I heard what you did for him this morning during his nightmare. Unfortunately, I was waiting for it to happen, so I didn’t sleep well last night. I came downstairs as soon as he started to scream. Just before I was about to barge through his door, which I found out was locked this morning…” she grimaced.

“That was also me…” Cas tried to defend Dean.

“Did I sound like I was done talking?” she snapped at Cas.

“Sorry, mom,” Cas apologized, bowing his head.

She took a breath. “Anyway, I heard you. From what I could tell you were making sure that he , as Castiel said, felt safe. You even told him you didn’t care that he woke you. Which, of course, is exactly what I would have said. So, thank you for being there for him,” she added with a smile.

_ Sleep be damned. No one should have nightmares like that. _

Becky’s expression changed to a scowl. “Be that as it may, I am still thoroughly pissed off with the two of you. Don’t ever think you will get away with that again. You don’t try to sneak people into my house without telling me, Castiel James Shurley, do you hear me?” she asked as she raised her voice just below the octave of screaming.

_ Full name… Fuck, she’s pissed! _

“Yes, mom. It won’t happen again,” he answered with a bow of his head.

“And you,” she snapped her head and locked eyes with Dean. “The only reason why you are allowed to sit at my table this morning is because of what you did for my son today. Don’t you dare think that if I only heard the first part of your visit that you would even be in my house right now.”

Dean’s face turned beet red.  _ Yup, she heard us... Worth it. _

“Mom, we didn’t do anything!” Cas growled.

“Castiel, don’t lie to me! I could hear both of you through the floor!” she barked.

Cas huffed out an exasperated breath. “We were just kissing!”

“Sure as hell didn’t sound like just kissing!” Becky hollered.

“Mom, I swear, we were just kissing. I may have gotten a bit carried away, but our pants never came off!”

_ Not that I didn’t want them to come off… Mind out of the gutter right now! _

“Pants never came off, huh? Then why is Dean wearing a pair of your sweatpants?” she asked, knowingly.

“Because we came in our pants, ma!” Castiel blurted.

Dean’s head fell into his hands.  _ Seriously, Cas? Why the fuck did you just tell her that? _

“I asked,” Becky huffed. “God, I still don’t want to know,” she groaned.

“Mom, I’m…”

Dean raised his head to see what was happening.

Becky was rubbing her forehead with both hands. “Just, stop talking for a minute. Please.”

An incredibly unpleasant silence filled the room.

Becky moved one of her hands to rest on the surface of the table as the other began to rub the bridge of her nose. “I don’t want to hear anything like that again in my life. I am emotionally and mentally scarred. You’re lucky I didn’t interrupt whatever it was that happened last night. Your father is the one who stopped me from barging in there, just F.Y.I.”

Castiel bowed his head as his face flushed.

“You should probably thank him for keeping Hannah in his office this morning, too,” she added.

_ Oh, thank GOD, he has kept her out of the kitchen for this entire argument. Talk about horrifying! _

Becky grabbed her plate and stood up. “Now, I’m going to reheat my pancakes, and we’re going to finish our breakfast, which I sure as hell am not cleaning up. I’ll leave that to you two. I expect groveling, boys, from here on out. Understand?”

“Yes, mom,” Castiel replied.

_ Far from a problem. Anything to keep you from keeping me away from him. _ “Yes, ma’am,”

“Good. Now, eat!” she ordered then walked over to the microwave.

Even though the pancakes were now cold, Dean dug in.  _ Fuck! They’re delicious.  _ He shoveled every last bit of the delightful pancakes into his mouth while Cas was still working on his first few bites.

Cas raised his eyebrows at Dean in shock.

He screwed up his face in confusion as he leaned into the center of the table for a slice of bacon.  _ What? You knew I was hungry! _

When Hannah and Chuck entered the room, Becky put Hannah’s pancakes into the microwave then stood in front of the stove to make Chuck a plate of pancakes.

Chuck and Cas exchanged looks in a silent conversation between father and son.

Cas nodded his head at his father.

Chuck smiled at Cas and Dean, then grabbed a slice of bacon. He turned to Dean. “I love bacon.”

Dean gave Chuck a wide grin. “Yeah? Me, too.”

Dean was curious about Cas’ silent conversation with Chuck. It clearly was their way of saying “ **later** ,” but Dean was afraid that Chuck would be livid that Dean spent the night in Cas’ bed. Dean honestly wouldn’t blame him. His actions showed Cas’ parents nothing but disrespect. Still, for some reason, when he looked into Chuck’s eyes, he could tell Chuck was far from angry. If anything, he seemed to appreciate Dean’s presence at his table.

_ I’m gonna get whiplash from this family. _

 

>>>>>>

 

_ I hear Guam is lovely this time of year. Maybe I can just zap Dean and myself there. _

It was a delightful thought, but completely impossible. Instead, Castiel and Dean had to suffer through the incredibly embarrassing conversation, well, more confrontation, at Castiel’s kitchen table.

Castiel’s mom was irate. There had only been four occasions in Castiel’s short life where Becky had lost her temper. Two of them had happened within the past four weeks.  _ Dean, evidently, is a bad influence on me. _

Poor Dean. If there were one thing Castiel wished for more than escape during their argument with Becky, it would be wiping the expression of complete mortification from Dean’s face. Castiel’s worst fears had been realized that morning. Not only did Becky know that Dean had spent the night, but she also heard them doing whatever they did last night.  _ Dry humping? I’m pretty sure it’s called dry humping, right? _ Of course, Castiel felt the need to embarrass the both of them further by admitting Dean’s pants were soiled with cum.  _ You need to learn not to overshare, Castiel. _

What Castiel did not expect, especially after the humiliating discussion with his mother, was his father’s evident lack of concern over Dean’s presence at their table. If anything, he would say Chuck was ecstatic to have Dean there with them. Chuck explained, silently, that they would talk later about Castiel’s indiscretions of the previous night, but Castiel was oddly hopeful about the outcome of that conversation.

The rest of the morning was spent cleaning up breakfast followed by watching Dean play with Hannah. It was just shy of endearing watching Dean play with her. At one point, Dean grabbed one of Hannah’s stuffed animals, a tiny penguin, and named it Mr. Pengui. Hannah laughed at him as he proceeded to give the penguin an epic backstory which involved fighting bad guys and criminals, all while dressed to impress in his penguin suit.

Hannah giggled uncontrollably. “Why does he have an accent?”

“Because he’s Pengui. Mr. Pengui,” Dean said in a voice that sounded oddly similar to Sean Connery.

Castiel threw his head back with a laugh. After watching over fifty movies with Dean over the past few weeks, Castiel understood the reference.

The smile Dean gave him due to Castiel’s understanding was nothing short of awe-inspiring.

_ Forget Helen of Troy, that face and smile were the cause of the Trojan War. _

Dean excused himself for a moment, much to Hannah’s disappointment, to call Bobby and Sam. He claimed when he left his house the night before, it was not in the best of conditions, and he was pretty sure that one or both of them were probably having a panic attack. More than likely the one would be Sam.

It was when Dean excused himself that Chuck approached Castiel.

Castiel followed his father into his office and stood in front of the desk rocking back and forth on the ball of his feet anxiously.

“Sit, please, Castiel,” Chuck requested.

Castiel took a seat and inspected his knotted fingers. He didn’t expect his father to yell at him like his mother had that morning, but he was not expecting the conversation to be pleasant by any means.

“So, last night. Big night for you, huh?”

Castiel didn’t answer, but he knew the blistering heat radiating off of his face from the strength of his blush was answer enough.

“Castiel, I know I can trust you. I did not call you into my office this afternoon to scold you. Nor do I plan on praising you. I’m simply worried about you is all.”

“I’m fine,” Castiel mumbled , h is focus still fixed on his fingers.

“Someone who screams in the dead of night is not fine, kid,” Chuck reproached.

“It’s complicated,” Castiel answered, chancing a glance in his father’s direction.

Chuck shook his head. “No. It’s fairly simple. You’re the one who is complicating it.”

Castiel’s eyes once again fell to his hands.

“Look, I know why they’ve started again, Castiel. Why the nightmares have returned. It’s because of Dean. Am I right?”

Castiel scowled at his father. “Dean would never do what Alas…”

Chuck waved his hands in front of him. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, kid! Not even close to where I was going with this!”

Castiel raised an eyebrow at his father.

“When your aunt was here, she commented. Actually, she does that often and without remorse, but this time it hit home. Do you know what she said?”

Castiel shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“She said I missed him. It’s good to have him back.”

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Good to have who back?”

“You, kid. She was talking about you. She asked me what changed. I told her there was only one new thing, or person, in your life.”

“Dean,” he grinned.

“Yes, Dean. Now, that being said, I know why the nightmares are back. I know it is not a fear of what Dean will do to you, but rather a fear of what will happen to Dean by him being with you. Am I right?”

Castiel nodded.  _ I would never forgive myself if something happened to him because of me. _

“I am aware, Castiel, that I am not particularly loquacious. Most of the reasoning behind it is because once I start to talk, I don’t stop. I’m a babbler. It gets awkward.”

Castiel chuckled.

Chuck smiled then continued. “I make up for my taciturn behavior by using my ears and eyes twice as much as my mouth. I can see and hear the difference that Dean has made. For example, a little over a month ago, I was taking the laundry down to the garage for your mother when I heard ‘Hey, Jude’ coming from your bedroom. Did I not?”

Castiel scoffed. “I listen to the Beatles all the time, dad. It’s not odd for that song to be coming from my room.”

“No. You’re right. It’s not. What is odd is it being played on a piano and sung by you. Or am I wrong?”

Castiel could feel all of the color drain from his face.  _ He heard me? _

“Does it bother you that I heard you?”

He shook his head. “No. I just don’t want you to get your hopes up and think that it will become a regular occurrence.”

“Why not?”

“Just feels like a waste of time,” Castiel explained with a shrug.

“It’s far from a waste of time, kid.”

“Agree to disagree,” Castiel muttered.

“Has Dean heard you play?” Chuck asked.

“Just a little. During music theory.”

“That’s not the same thing.”

Castiel leaned his head back and gazed at the ceiling. “Does it matter?” he asked with a sigh.

“Yes. The kid has a serious passion for music, and something tells me he is part of the reason why I heard music coming from your room that day. Correct?”

Castiel didn’t move a muscle. The answer was a resounding yes, but he didn’t need his father pushing this issue any further.  _ Why is this so important to him that I start playing again? _

“Play for him, Castiel. Dean has played for you, hasn’t he? He has sung Disney music with you and Hannah countless times. He obviously wants to bring music back into your life. Let him.”

Castiel narrowed his eyes at Chuck. “Not to interrupt, Dad, but what does this have to do with anything?”

“Well, your cousin and I were talking?”

_ Which one? _

“Balthazar,” Chuck answered Castiel’s internal question.

_ Ah… _ Castiel nodded.

“We discussed him coming to work for me when he graduates in two years.  He implied that someone, namely you, had little to no interest in getting into the publishing field.”

_ I’m gonna fucking kill him. _

“Don’t be angry with him. He’s only trying to help.”

_ Yeah, he seems to like doing that. A lot. _

“Your Aunt Amara would be happy for you to take Balthazar’s spot at the label. Especially, now that you’re playing again.”

“Dad!” Castiel whined. “You told her?!?”

“Yes.”

“Why?!?”

“Because, kid, you have no interest in publishing. I didn’t need your cousin, Balthazar, to tell me that. Music has been and always will be where you belong.”

Castiel grimaced at the floor.

“I had NYU deliver an application to the house, Castiel.”

His jaw dropped as his eye widened in shock. “Dad! What?!? No. I can’t go to NYU.”

“Why not?” Chuck inquired, puzzled. “Balthazar told me you showed interest in what they have to offer. Your grades and extracurricular activities alone should earn you a spot. I can definitely afford the tuition. So, what’s the problem?”

Castiel didn’t have an answer.

“Look, the entire point of this conversation is I want you to be happy. Music is a part of you. It always has been. I have watched you grow, kid. Your passion and heart lie in music. I have never had a problem with that,” Chuck promised. “I have nothing but respect for the boy in the other room. He brought that part of you back. You have no idea how happy I was when I heard the sound of that keyboard coming from your room. I could have cried just sitting there listening to you sing and play again.”

Castiel once again refused to look at his father. He knew if he saw the look of pure sincerity on his dad’s face he would lose control of his emotions.

“Now, about last night,” Chuck began.

He squeezed his eyes shut and prayed for his father to stop.  _ Oh, please! Not you, too. _

“I stopped your mom from coming downstairs because I knew that Dean respects you too damn much to force you to do anything you don’t want to do. Also, to be honest, I knew there was no way it was sex.”

“Dad, please! Just stop!”  _ I am scarred for life. _

Thankfully, Chuck changed the subject. “Don’t tell your mother I said this, but I’m happy he spent the night. When your mother told me what he did for you when you woke up screaming, it only further solidified how I feel about Dean.”

_ Yeah, he’s…  _ Castiel knew hearts were bursting from his eyes as he continued to blush.

“Probably going to be my famous last words, but I trust the kid. I know you’ll be alright because you have him. Call me crazy, but I don’t think he’s ever going anywhere.”

Castiel knew he was smiling like an imbecile, but nothing would make him happier than if those words were actually true.  _ They probably aren’t, but it’s nice to imagine that they could be. _

Chuck cleared his throat. “All that being said, you shouldn’t worry about Dean. He can take care of himself. From what your mom tells me, he has already proved that he can do just that. Evidently, he broke Alastair’s nose?”

Castiel smirked and nodded his head.  _ Sure did. _

“She also told me you probably wouldn’t be alive if he hadn’t stayed to keep watch at that party.”

A chill ran up Castiel’s spine from the truth behind that statement. “Probably not,” he replied.

“Well, for what it’s worth, you don’t have to worry about me being overbearing when it comes to Dean. I’ll leave that to your mother,” he added with a smile.

Castiel stayed in his seat, smiling, for a moment or two longer in comfortable silence with his father. Eventually, he felt it was probably a good idea to get up and save his new boyfriend from his family.

“Castiel,” Chuck said as Castiel stood up to leave.

“Yeah, dad?”

“Love ya, kid.”

Castiel gave his dad a crooked smile. “Love you, too, dad.”

As Castiel exited the office, his grin grew wider. His dad didn’t hate Dean. In fact, he respected Dean. Not to mention, Chuck was happy Dean was there for Castiel the night before. All of it was terrific news. Still, the news of his dad liking Dean was overshadowed by slightly more incredible news of how Chuck was okay with him pursuing music. On top of that, he even had the application for the college Castiel had only dreamed about delivered to their house. There were only two weeks for him to submit the application, but his skin was buzzing with the excitement of what the future could bring.

When he entered the living room, Dean was back where he was before, on the floor next to Hannah. This time he was holding a bear and the penguin, Mr. Pengui, which Hannah adamantly insisted remain said penguin’s name. Apparently, Tilly, the bear’s new name, was in the process of trying to stop the evil Goldfish from killing Barbie.  _ Way to turn playing with Hannah into the plot of  _ **_Goldfinger_ ** _ , Dean, _ he thought as he shook his head.

Dean blew a kiss and winked at Castiel as if he could read his mind and could tell that Castiel was mocking him.

Castiel rolled his eyes.  _ Wouldn’t doubt that he has the ability to at least somewhat guess what I’m thinking. _

After Dean was finished reenacting the final scene from  _ Goldfinger _ with Hannah’s stuffed animals, he stood up and smiled down at the little girl. “Well, Hannah we’ve been playing for over two hours now. Do you mind if Castiel and I spend some time together?”

Hannah pouted and crossed her arms over her chest with a huff. “You’re not gonna want to play with me anymore now that Castiel is your boyfriend.”

“Seriously, Hannah!” Castiel admonished. “What was he just doing for the past two hours?”

“Hey, Cas. It’s okay,” Dean said as he held up a hand to signify Castiel needed to stop and chill for a second. Dean knelt on the ground next to Hannah. “Sweetheart, me being Castiel’s boyfriend does not mean I like you any less. You’re still my favorite little girl, okay?”

_ God, I friggin love it when he says my full name. Everyone else says it and nothing. He says it, and I want to jump him. _

“You don’t hate me, Dean?” Hannah asked as her pout turned into a massive frown.

“Aww, sweetheart, no! I could never hate you,” Dean promised as he hugged her. He rubbed soothing circles into her back. “How about this? Tomorrow, I come over, and we can play with Mr. Pengui and some of his other pals. How does that sound?”

She nodded her head as she sniffled.

Dean gave her another squeeze then released her and stood up again. He strutted over to Castiel and held out his hand.

Castiel grabbed it without question and laced their fingers together.

Dean kissed his cheek. “Let’s go downstairs and watch a movie.”

“Do you want to watch some Bond?” Castiel asked as he led the way to the stairs.

“Definitely!” Dean exclaimed.

“I’m more of a Roger Moore fan. Can we watch one with him in it?”

Dean stopped moving behind him. “Roger Moore? Really?”

“He’s ten times better than Craig or Dalton.”

“Hey, Craig is a fudging beast, man. Don’t knock, Craig!”

Castiel rolled his eyes as he continued down the stairs without Dean. “You can stay up there on the stairs all day for all I care. However, if you don’t move your ass, I just might have to put on  _ Moonraker _ .”

“Ugh, please no! At least put on  _ Live and Let Die. _ Better music and a sexier damsel,” Dean argued.

Castiel turned around and climbed a few steps until he was right in Dean’s personal space. He grabbed the collar of Dean’s shirt and pulled him in for a quick yet surprisingly heated kiss that left them both wanting.

When Castiel broke the kiss and backed away from the green-eyed sex god standing before him, said god’s eyes were still partially closed, and his lips were still slightly pursed.

Castiel smirked. “Okay,” he whispered in Dean’s ear.

Dean’s eyelashes fluttered as he sluggishly pulled himself out of whatever stupor he was in from Castiel’s kiss.

_ I love that I can do that to him _ .

Castiel made it to the bottom of the stairs first with a bounce in his step.

Dean caught up quickly and spun Castiel around. He grabbed both sides of Castiel’s face and kissed him with fierce passion.

Castiel’s hands sought out for something to anchor onto as Dean’s kiss began to quite literally sweep him off his feet. His right hand grasped Dean’s left bicep and gripped it tight to keep himself from falling.

Dean’s strong, rough, hands traveled from the sides of Castiel’s face to his shoulders where they steadied him onto his feet. Dean broke the kiss and stared at his arm. “Quite a grip you got there, Cas.”

Castiel shook his head to clear it. He lifted the short sleeve of Dean’s shirt and saw a handprint-shaped bruise was starting to form on Dean’s arm. “Oh, Dean! I am so sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you!”

Dean shrugged. “We’ll just add it to the list of things you’ve done to claim me the past couple of days,” he jested with a smirk. “I’ve already agreed to be your boyfriend. You don’t have to mark me every day. You’re so possessive,” he claimed with a wink.

Castiel bit his bottom lip then trailed kisses down to the hickey on Dean’s neck. He licked it then nipped it.

“Ah,” Dean moaned.

Castiel leaned in to whisper in Dean’s ear. “I believe you made a promise to finish something earlier, Dean.” His voice hit a ridiculously lower octave when he said “Dean.”

A shiver ran through Dean’s body. “Fuck yes!”

Castiel gave Dean a crooked grin.  _ I love teasing him. _

“Well, get in there,” Dean ordered as he spanked Castiel’s ass.

“Oh, kinky,” Castiel snickered.

“You have no idea.”

_ Promise? _

 

>>>>>>

 

**Sam: So, guess where Dean was last night?**

**Jo: Idk where?**

**Sam: Castiel’s.**

**Charlie: WHAT?!?!?!**

**Sam: Yeah, I just got off the phone with Dean. He was pissed when he left last night. I had no idea where he was going or what he was going to do. Instead of doing something Lily level stupid, he went to Castiel’s.**

**Charlie: One moment, please.**

 

**> >>>>>**

 

“His voice mail is so fucking stupid. Answer the fucking phone, Castiel!”

After trying him for the fifth time, Charlie decided to text him.

**Charlie: You better call me back right fucking now, mister, or so help me I will show up at your house and embarrass the fuck out of you!**

Charlie paced back in forth in front of her cell phone, glaring at it.  _ Where the fuck is he?!?  _ There were only two conclusions Charlie could draw from Castiel not answering the phone. Either Becky found out, and now Castiel and Dean are dead. Or…  _ Oh, my God… I don’t even want to think about them like that. _

A half-hour later, Castiel finally called her back. She almost knocked over her dresser in the process.

“WHAT THE HELL, CASTIEL?!?! DEAN SPENDS THE NIGHT, AND YOU DON’T FUCKING TELL ME?!”

“ _ Well, good afternoon to you, too, Charlie. _ ” Dean’s smug voice came laughing through the phone.

“You did  **not** just put me on speaker right now, Castiel!”

A deep breath and a sigh came through the phone. “ _ Charlie, you are not on speaker. You are screaming at me through the phone. So, of course, he can hear you. _ ”

“Why didn’t you call and tell me you were expecting him over last night?”

“ _ I wasn’t expecting him, Charlie. He came over to check up on me last night. I asked him to spend the night. _ ”

“Do your parents know he spent the night?” Charlie asked with her left hand planted firmly on her hip while the other went flying up into the air in exasperation.

“ _ Yes. _ ”

There was silence.

She huffed. “Are you going to elaborate on that?”

“ _ My mom expects us to grovel due to the betrayal. My dad told me he likes Dean and… well… I’ll explain later. _ ”

Charlie’s jaw dropped. “What?!?”

“ _ You’re dad told you he likes me? Awesome! Guess that’s one parent I don’t have to worry about,”  _ Dean added excitedly.

“ _ Dean, shut up, _ ” Castiel groaned.

Charlie rolled her eyes. “So, what happened last night?”

“ _ Uh...um…”  _ Castiel stammered.

“Talk!” Charlie demanded.

“ _ We made out, _ ” Dean answered for Castiel.

Charlie could hear Castiel growl.

“ _ What?! We did! _ ” Dean chuckled.

Castiel sighed. “ _ Look, Charlie, it’s been a long day, and it was an even longer night. Can we talk about this later? Please? I promise to give you all the details another time. _ ”

“You better, mister!” she snapped.

“ _ I promise, Charlie. I was going to tell you. I’m assuming Sam is the one who beat me to it? _ ” Castiel asked with a hiss Charlie was sure was not directed at her.

She was right.

“ _ What?!? Since when have I ever been able to control him?” _ Dean asked.

Charlie rolled her eyes again. “All right! Shut up! We’ll talk later.”

“ _ Thank you, Charlie. _ ”

“You’re lucky I love you, bestie.”

Castiel laughed softly. “ _ Yes. I know. _ ”

“Bye, Castiel. I know you can hear me, too. So, bye, Dean.”

“ _ Goodbye, _ ” Castiel said.

Dean followed Castiel with a “ _ Later, Charlie. _ ”

The line went dead.

_ This relationship is going to be all sorts of interesting. Isn’t it? _

 

>>>>>>

 

**Charlie: Information has been confirmed. Dean did spend the night at his house.**

**Sam: Did you not believe me or something?**

**Jo: Damn, what happened?**

**Charlie: I didn’t get the full details. He said he’d tell me later.**

**Sam: I didn’t get details either.**

**Jo: Maybe we shouldn’t pry. This is their relationship. They deserve their privacy.**

**Charlie: Yeah, not happening. Lol**

**Sam: I don’t even wanna know. Leave me out of this. Knowing my brother, I’m going to need a bucket of brain bleach.**

**Charlie: He’s my best friend. I tell him everything. I deserve to know what happened.**

**Jo: Everything?**

**Charlie: Well, I guess not everything ;)**

**Sam: Okay… I’m done. Later.**

**Jo: Lol**

**Charlie: Wimp. Lmao**


	36. Chapter Thirty-Six

Life was pretty friggin ’ close to perfect for Dean. It was hard for him to believe it was all real. Dean found himself wondering if someday he would wake up only to realize it was all just an incredible dream. In his experience, good things didn’t just happen to him. There was always a price.  _ Is it okay for me to be this happy _ ?

Before Black Friday, Dean thought he was spending an exorbitant amount of time with Cas. So much time, in fact, Dean was finding his friends and family alike were asking him, “Where have you been?” He wasn’t ashamed of the amount of time he was spending with Cas. If anything, he was finding he preferred spending time with Cas more so than anyone else. Well, everyone except Sam.  

Once Cas and Dean became official, Dean discovered he could always squeeze in a little extra Cas time somewhere. Homework was never an issue. Dean would usually complete a bulk of it during his breaks at the high school or during his two-hour break on Mondays. Studying, well, he tried to fit that in somewhere. Even though he knew it was wrong, most of his studying took place during the class right before whatever test he had to take or while he was working at the shop. Another unfortunate cost of his decision to fit Cas into every spare minute of his time was he had to go without his Baby for a week. Even so, she looked like a new lady by the time her repairs were finished, so Dean felt like she could forgive him.

A lot of what they did before had not changed. Dean would still come over every chance he could get; they’d watch movies and eat takeout. However, there were some definite changes he was really fucking happy about. Movie viewing was no longer limited to just the living room. A vast majority of the time they were now watching them in Cas’ room. Not that they were really watching the movies. They were never surprised  that when the credits would start scrolling down the screen, they could not recall a scene of the movie they were “watching.”  _ It’s not my fault his mouth, and his touch is so fucking addictive and distracting! _

Of course, with Becky’s, and randomly enough, Gabriel’s, constant need to check up on them , it never went anywhere further than a heated makeout session. Even so, he would take what he could get when it came to Cas. Regrettably, or maybe not, depends on someone’s point of view of such activities, he did find himself masturbating a lot more often than he used to when he was home. They weren’t average everyday masturbating session. No. Like a nympho who was desperate for anyone to touch them, Dean would wait until he was either alone in his house, or if he couldn’t wait, in the relatively private space of his garage inside the Impala. Once he felt comfortable enough to unleash, for lack of a better term, the Kraken, he would release some of the most inhuman sounds he had ever made.

On top of that, he had found himself having to thoroughly clean the interior of his Baby more often because of the amazingly intense orgasms he couldn’t keep himself from having when he thought about Cas.  _ Well, hey, at least you found Cas’ trench coat underneath the front seat… I gotta remember to give that back to him eventually. _

There was, in Dean’s opinion, definitely a reason for concern for how often he was masturbating. The bottle of lube that was in the glove compartment had now doubled in size, and he was beginning to think it was probably unhealthy for a guy his age to need to jerk off as often as he was.

All of his extra “me” time was due to his imperative need to not incur the wrath of Becky. The last thing either of them needed was for Becky to walk in with Dean’s hand down Cas’ pants or vice versa.  _ Or you know, one of our mouths filled with the other’s dick, whichever one works. _

On more than one occasion, Dean found himself falling asleep in Cas’ bed. It was absolutely intentional. He knew what he was doing every time he made himself comfortable, but he honestly could not find a reason why he should leave. Cas’ nightmares were becoming less frequent, the mattress was, in fact, memory foam, he asked, and he adored waking up with Castiel in his arms in the morning.

The first time Becky found Dean asleep in Cas’ bed, he felt an urgent need to beg for his life. Within a minute, Dean had put his boots then his jacket on and was out the door. However, a few days later she approached him about the situation.

“Dean, we need to talk,” she urged as he was playing with Hannah.

_ Of course, she corners you while Castiel is taking a shower. _ “Yeah, what’s up?”

Becky sighed. “Hannah, sweetie, I need to borrow Dean for a minute or so, okay?”

Hannah pouted. “We was playing, mama.”

“I swear he’ll be right back,” Becky promised.

Hannah seemed to mull the request over a bit before she came up with a demand of her own. “Ten minutes.”

“It won’t take that long,” Becky replied.

“Okay,” Hannah said with a smile and went back to playing.

Becky led Dean to the kitchen table.

_ I’m really starting to hate this table. _

“Take a seat, Dean,” Becky requested.

Dean sat down and rubbed his sweaty palms on the thighs of his jeans. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes and no,” Becky admitted with a shrug.

_ Oh, shit… _

She took a deep breath. “Castiel woke up screaming again last night.”

Dean bowed his head. “Crap. He’s been doing so well.”

“Well, you see, that’s why I wanted to talk to you,” Becky explained. “Ugh,” she groaned as she started to rub her forehead. “I fudging hate myself for what I’m about to say and ask.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed in bemusement.  _ Huh? _

Becky lifted her head then glared at the ceiling before she took a deep breath and locked eyes with Dean. “Look, the only time I’ve noticed my son doesn’t wake up in terror from the nightmares of his past is when you’re here with him. Every time you’re not here, I have to sleep on the couch downstairs because he wakes up at least three to four times a night suffocating. I just… I can’t watch him go through this again.”

An intense pressure filled Dean’s chest then crushed his heart in a vice grip. Nothing could ever make him forget the morning he woke up to Cas screaming and choking on one of his nightmares.  _ You wanted to find and kill Alastair… Not like that’s anything new, but there are more and more things being added to the list of reasons why he should be dead.  _ “What can I do to help?”

It was clear the Becky was disgusted by what she was about to beg Dean to do, but she was Cas’ mom. Any mom worth her salt would gladly give up their life if it meant their child would be safe. So, regardless of how much she despised the request, Dean knew whatever it was she would do it for her son.

She took a deep breath. “Castiel needs you, Dean. So, because he needs you, I need you to stay here with him until he feels safe enough to sleep on his own.”

Dean’s eye widened in shock. “What?! Becky, I don’t know about this. I don’t want you to push your limits on what makes you feel comfortable.”

She huffed out a frustrated breath. “Do you want to be here, Dean?”

“Of course, I do,” he answered without hesitation.

“Then accept my request before I come to my senses and rescind the offer,” Becky snapped. “Trust me, Dean, I am  **not** okay with you sharing a bed with my son every night. But he can’t sleep without you. I need my sleep so I can help him when he needs me. Since I am losing sleep because of his nightmares, I’m afraid that I might not be able to function well enough to help him or do my job at the hospital. I can’t bare watching him go through this again. As much as I hate to admit it, you seem to be the best solution overall for the situation.”

“You know I’ll do anything for him. If you need me to spend the night, I’ll do it,” he said with a nod.

Becky rolled her eyes. “Don’t act like you’re not fudging ecstatic about this.”

_ I really fucking am, but… _ “I don’t like that it makes you uncomfortable, Becky. You are his mother, after all, and it is your house. I don’t want to piss you off… again,” he added.

“This time is different because you have my permission. Even though I hate giving it.”

Dean nodded his head in understanding. “Well, again, I’ll do anything for Castiel if it helps him.”

Becky smiled. “Thank you.”

“No problem,” he answered.

“Now, get back to reenacting  _ Dr. No _ with Mr. Pengui,” she ordered with a wave of her hand.

Dean smirked. “Yes, ma’am.”

When Cas noticed Becky’s sudden change of heart, he cleared out a drawer for Dean. The way he told Dean what he had done was incredibly adorable.

Cas covered Dean’s eyes and led him into his bedroom.

Dean chuckled. “You know if you’re trying to get kinky, there are much better ways of doing this and would give you the ability to use your hands.”

“If I didn’t think you would open your eyes as soon as I remove my hands, I’d be smacking you right now,” Cas grumbled.

“Ooo, talk dirty to me,” Dean snickered.

Cas kicked Dean’s foot. “You’re an ass.”

Dean laughed. “Yes, but I’m your ass.”

He could hear Cas’ eye roll. “Come on, only a few more feet.”

When they stopped, Cas removed his hands, and Dean opened his eyes.

Dean looked down at an empty drawer. “Um? What am I looking at, Cas?”

“An empty drawer,” he smiled.

He arched an eyebrow at Cas. “Yeah, I got that. Why?”

Cas blushed. “Well, it’s because it’s your drawer.”

Dean's eyes widened in shock. “What?” he breathed.

“You’ve been spending the night quite often this past week. I felt it would probably be a good idea for you to have a place to put some of your things,” Cas explained while he stared down at his knotted fingers.

Dean beamed. “You’re awesome!”

Cas gazed upon Dean with those too blue eyes of his and grinned. “You like it?”

Dean nodded his head emphatically. “Yes. A lot.”

Without warning, Cas grabbed the back of Dean’s neck and pulled him close, crashing their lips together.

Before he knew it, Dean found himself crawling over Cas’ mattress to lay between the muscular thighs of his sexy as fuck boyfriend.

Cas’ breathing was erratic, his face flushed, and the blue of his eyes was close to nonexistent behind his dilated pupils. He grabbed the back of Dean’s neck and pulled him down, meeting him a third of the way to crush their lips together.

As soon as Cas wrapped his legs around Dean’s waist, Dean rolled his hips to cause the delicious friction they were both craving.

They were attempting to grope, scratch, lick, and suck, everywhere and anywhere their hearts desired, trying to keep their moans of pleasure to a minimum.

Cas had already unlatched Dean’s belt and was in the process of undoing the button then lowering the zipper of his jeans.

There was no form of intelligible thought going through Dean’s mind. It took every ounce of control he had not to groan and beg Cas to touch him. Apparently, he didn’t have to beg him to do anything. Once Cas’ hand was rubbing against Dean’s cock through his boxers, they both uttered a moan which was about as muted a volume as they could muster.

“What’re you guys doing down there?!” Becky hollered from the upstairs.

_ Of course, she fucking hears us. She’s got fucking sonar or some shit. _

Cas rolled his eyes and tried to control his breathing. “Nothing, ma!” he yelled back.

Becky scoffed. “Uh-huh, let’s keep it that way!”

_ I’m going to be forever suffering from a case of serious blue balls. _

All of the nauseating cuteness of their relationship aside, Dean was always worried about the ever-looming presence of Alastair. Every time Dean saw him at the high school, the bastard would be wearing a smug grin. A couple of times the asshole even had the nerve to blow a kiss at him. Luckily, Charlie and Jo were there the first time Alastair blew a kiss, so Dean didn’t end up killing him on school property.

Dean hated not having a solution to the Alastair problem. Cas’ first day back to school was right around the corner. There was no earthly way he could be there with Cas every second of the day. Thankfully, one class everyone who cared about Cas didn’t have to worry about was gym. Cas was still exempt from any and all participation in the class without his doctor’s approval. From what Cas told Dean, Cas’ doctor knew the situation and was going to milk the injury for all it was worth.

Still, if Black Friday taught Dean anything, there was no way that they were going to be able to escape him. For some reason, Alastair had his attention laser-focused on Cas. Dean only prayed that he would be able to protect Cas from what Alastair was planning to do next.

 

>>>>>>

 

The remaining two weeks of Castiel’s medical leave from school were comparable to the weeks before Thanksgiving. Most of his time was spent doing homework, playing the piano in private, of course, and spending time with Dean. There was, however, one majorly significant change since then, Dean was now his boyfriend.

Their time together was much like it always had been. Dean would come over, watch movies, and eat takeout. Except now, instead of sitting on the couch together, their new destination of choice was Castiel’s room. Generally speaking, Becky was okay with them spending time in Castiel’s room, but the door always has to remain ajar. Still, even though Castiel did exactly as she asked, every half hour or so, Becky would holler down the stairs to make sure they weren’t up to any funny business. _Where did that idiom come from?_ _It’s nonsensical. There is nothing funny satisfying one’s desires._

To add insult to injury, whenever Becky had her one shift a week at the hospital, Gabriel would be there to prevent anything from happening. Almost as if Gabriel was in cahoots with his mom to make Castiel’s life miserable. That, or Gabriel just liked pissing him off.

Even so, there were rare occasions where Becky’s constant need to check up on Castiel and Dean did not prevent them from doing more than kissing. Sadly, it was never anything more than a bit of above the waist, under the shirt teasing, or ass grabbing, but he was hoping to eventually go further than that.

Much to Becky’s irritation, but also admittedly to Castiel’s pleasure, more often than not, Dean would end up falling asleep holding him almost every night. At first, his mom would come downstairs, awaken them from a deep sleep, and send Dean home. Thankfully, Becky eventually gave up for one reason or another and allowed Dean to spend practically every night with him. Castiel assumed it was probably due to his nightmares. The only nights Castiel would make it through the night without screaming at the top of his lungs were the ones where Dean was there beside him.  So, Castiel figured that even though his mom despised the idea of Dean spending the night, for his sake, and her sanity, she let Dean stay.

As soon as his mom stopped trying, Castiel, like the sap he knew he was, cleared out a draw for Dean.  _ If he’s going to be sleeping here, he needs a place to put his pajamas and a spare change of clothing. _ It was hilarious, in Castiel’s opinion, when his mom realized what he had done. He could have sworn he saw steam coming out of her ears. Even though he knew he shouldn’t find her reaction hilarious, when Becky accidentally washed a pair of Dean’s boxer, it took every ounce of his self-control to keep himself from laughing.  _ Oops… It’s not like we're doing anything untoward. Besides making out… and groping. _

A small part of Castiel thought he would eventually get sick of Dean. However, Castiel found nothing could be further from the truth. It didn’t matter that they were spending every spare moment they had with one another. As clingy as Castiel thought it seemed, he wanted Dean around as often as he could have him. Dean, of course, still had responsibilities that were unavoidable, such as work, school, and student teaching. Plus, Castiel had duties of his own that he had to attend to. So, it was probably for the best that Dean wasn’t there all of the time.

College application deadlines were right around the corner. Castiel had initially planned to send applications to SUNY Stony Brook, Saint Joseph’s, SUNY Farmingdale, Hofstra, Adelphi, and Long Island University. Now, since the option of a music major was a possibility, Castiel found himself applying to more colleges than he had originally anticipated. He had to add NYU, which was his first choice. CW Post and Five Towns College were both on the island, so he thought he might as well. Then, for fun, he applied to Julliard. It would be close to impossible for him to get in, but it’s a prestigious school. It didn’t matter that Castiel had a job lined up as soon as he had his diploma. Going to a school like Julliard would help him gain reputable contacts in the business.  _ Talk about networking. _

The anxiety of sending out applications and the overwhelming stress of trying to catch up on school work was starting to wear down on Castiel’s nerves. Fortunately, he had Charlie and Jo. Even though they were just as swamped as he was with college applications, they were willing to lay everything out and stress out with him. On the second Sunday of December, two days before Castiel was due to go back to school, Charlie and Jo came over to finish perfecting their applications before the deadline. Which, of course, was the next day.

“You know, Castiel, I was expecting my college application process to be simple. But, no. You just had to add NYU to your list,” Charlie griped. “Now, I have to apply to NYU, Columbia, Manhattan College, Fordham, and Saint John’s. You’re a pain in my ass, Shurley!”

“You don’t have to apply to any of those colleges, Charlie. You are choosing to apply to all of them,” Castiel rebutted as he read over one of his many essays for the millionth time.

“Nuh-uh, Castiel. Don’t pull that bullshit. We had an agreement, mister. We said only Long Island Colleges. That way we would always be close to one another. Isn’t that right, Jo?”

Jo nodded. “Exactly. I’m applying to more college now, too. I don’t expect to get accepted to more than a third of them, but I’m trying. Doesn’t hurt.”

Charlie kissed Jo on the cheek. “You’re going to get into at least seventy-five percent of them, sweetness. Give yourself some credit.”

Jo rolled her eyes. “If you say so.”

Castiel ran his fingers through his hair and pulled. “Ugh! My eyes are going to fall out of my head! I can’t do this anymore! I’m about to go insane!”

Charlie rubbed soothing circles onto Castiel’s back. “Don’t worry, bestie. There is not a doubt in my mind that you’ll get into NYU. I can feel it in my gut.”

He rubbed his eyes for a few moments before he spoke. “I never thought music would be an option. Now that it is, I find I am not handling the stress as well as I should.”

“Speaking of music,” Charlie clapped her hands together, “are you going to try out for the musical with me?”

Castiel gave Charlie a bitch face. “You must be joking.”

“No, Castiel, I am completely serious! It will be so much fun!” Charlie exclaimed.

“It’s  _ RENT _ , Castiel,” Jo informed with a smile. “You love that musical.”

“I also love being continent,” Castiel snarked. “If I step one foot on that stage, I can kiss the control I have over my bladder goodbye.”

“Come on. At least do pit orchestra. Oh! Or maybe even stage crew! Jo is in stage crew, and Meg would definitely be okay with you joining her band of merry misfits!” Charlie rambled.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “I’ll think about it. Pit orchestra sounds more likely than stage crew. The last thing I need is for Alastair to find a way to shoot me with a nail gun.”

“You would have too many people up your ass the entire time you’re there . I t would be impossible for that to happen,” Charlie admonished.

“Plus, your boyfriend will probably park his ass at the set all the time to make sure you’re well protected. So, lighten up,” Jo added with a knowing smile.

Castiel huffed out a deep breath. “Are you two done? I’d really like to finish these applications.”

Thankfully, Charlie and Jo didn’t push the subject any further.

There was unconcealed apprehension in the Shurley household the night before Castiel’s first day back. Luckily, Dean was working at the high school on Castiel’s first day back, so his parents agreed Castiel should go in early with Dean. If he took the bus to school, he would be alone when he arrived. Charlie happily agreed to also go to school with them. When Dean was no longer working at the high school, everyone knew Castiel would still need someone there with him in the morning. Castiel put up no argument. Even though Charlie agreeing to be there for him every morning was a small gesture, despite his constant predicament, it still made Castiel feel safe.

The morning went smoothly. After the titillating and hilarious moment which happened when Castiel entered his room to get dressed, they picked up Charlie then made a pit stop at Strathmore for some bagels and hot beverages. Winter was coming, and it was colder than a witches tit outside. Coffee or tea was imperative for the next four to five months

Much to Castiel’s surprise, Dean went to Mrs. Harvelle’s office as soon as they entered the school to pick up the keys to the auditorium. Castiel had noticed the guitar Dean was carrying, but he didn’t think Dean would actually be playing, especially since Dean had been a nervous wreck for weeks about Castiel going back to school.  _ Even though I love hearing him play, this is the last thing I expected today. _

All of them, well, except Dean for some reason, were shocked to find Jo waiting for them in Ms. Harvelle’s office. Of course, Charlie was over the moon when she saw Jo sitting there. Charlie had already admitted earlier at Strathmore that she felt like the third wheel whenever she was around Dean and Castiel. Jo’s appearance immediately solved her dilemma.

When they entered the auditorium, Dean ran to the lighting booth; leaving Jo, Charlie, and Castiel standing on the stage.

“What’s he doing?” Jo asked.

“He likes to come in here every morning and play his guitar,” Castiel explained. “The acoustics are better in here.”

“Why don’t you play for us, too.” Charlie put both of her hands on Castiel’s shoulders then steered him in the direction of the piano.

With every ounce of strength Castiel had, he tried to push Charlie back so he could make his escape. “I most certainly will not be playing this morning.”

“Aww, come on, Castiel! It’s been years since we’ve heard you play,” Jo whined as she joined Charlie in her attempt to lead Castiel to the piano. “Plus, it’s only the four of us in here.”

Castiel shook his head adamantly. “No. That is not happening.”

“Hey! What are you guys arguing about?” Dean asked as he climbed the stairs onto the stage.

“Well, I asked Castiel to play the piano, and he’s being an ass about it,” Charlie answered. “Apparently, even though his application for NYU is in the mail, he still refuses to play for anyone.”

“Don’t force him to do something he doesn’t want to do,” Dean replied in Castiel’s defense.

Charlie put her hands on her hips. “Have you ever heard him play the piano or sing?”

Dean rubbed the back of his neck in a nervous gesture. “Yeah, I’ve heard him sing. The only time I’ve ever heard him play anything is during music theory , w hich doesn’t really count.”

“Doesn’t he have a beautiful voice?” Charlie asked with conviction. “Because I think he’s forgotten how glorious it truly is.”

“Beautiful and glorious, no offense, Charlie, are understatements,” Dean replied.

_ What?! Does he like my voice? _ “Really?” Castiel questioned with trepidation.

Dean smiled crookedly at Castiel. “Yeah, Cas. I’m pretty sure I once told you that you put Prince Phillip to shame.”

Castiel felt his face flush. “I thought you were joking.”

“I wasn’t. I don’t joke about music,” Dean stated.

“Pleeeease, Castiel!” Charlie begged. “Just this once, then I won’t bother you ever again.”

Jo was giving him a thumbs up from behind Dean and Charlie.

“All right,” Castiel sighed. His body shook with terror as he approached the piano. Once he took his seat on the bench, he let his fingers ghost over the keys, then took a deep breath. “So, what am I playing?”

“Play whatever you want,” Jo offered.

Castiel smirked. “Well, in that case...” He had no intentions of playing fair . H e didn’t want to play the piano for them in the first place. “‘I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts, deedalee, deedalee. There they are…’”

“NO!” Jo and Charlie barked in unison.

“Hey!” Castiel chuckled. “You told me to play whatever I want to play. I did precisely what you told me to do. So, whose fault is it really?”

Charlie rolled her eyes. “Come on, Castiel. Be at least a little serious about this.”

Suddenly, Dean appeared on the bench next to him.

_ You sitting next to me is not helping, Dean, _ he grimaced.

“Why don’t you play a Beatles song? I’m sure you know a few of those,” Dean suggested with a sweet smile.

Castiel sighed. “Well, if you want me to be serious about it, there is one song I greatly enjoy playing. It was the very first song I ever heard by The Beatles.”

“Is it ‘Love Me Do,’” Dean smirked.

Castiel rolled his eyes for what seemed like the millionth time. “No, Dean. My life is not a Bad Company song. Plus, my name is not Johnny.”

Dean nudged him. “You know I’m joking.”

“Play it for us, Castiel,” Charlie requested as she leaned up against the piano.

Castiel took one final deep breath.  _ Here goes nothing. _


	37. Chapter Thirty-Seven

Despite the extreme comfiness of Cas’ memory foam mattress, Dean could hardly sleep the night before Cas’ first day back to school. Every time he would finally start to fall asleep, his mind would construct a different horrific scenario of what could happen. Every time his mind played another trick on him, his hold on Cas would get a little tighter. Once he placed a soft kiss on the top of the sleeping angel in his arms, Dean’s mind would be at ease ... for about five minutes when his mind would once again destroy any chance of him sleeping.

When Cas was home, Dean knew he was safe. He could always keep a watchful eye on him while he was there. Chuck, Becky, or Gabriel would be there for Cas when he couldn’t. Unexpected scenarios were nearly impossible in the privacy of Cas’ home. Now, Dean would have no way of guaranteeing Cas’ safety. There was no way Dean could prevent Alastair from appearing where they least expected him to be, especially on school property. 

Considering the inevitable stress all of them were going to end up going through, Dean approached the subject of homeschooling with Cas and his parents. Becky and Chuck were all for it. Apparently, the idea had occurred to them more than once. However, Cas outright refused to be home-schooled. He said they were basically giving up and allowing Alastair to win if he stayed home. From what Becky told him later, part of the reason they never moved after everything happened in eighth grade was that Cas refused to leave his friends. Cas’ spirit had been broken enough. They didn’t want to break it further by moving away.

The silver lining to the entire situation was when Becky and Chuck asked him to take Cas to school every day. On top of everything else, Charlie lived close by, so they all decided it was probably a good idea to pick her up in the mornings, too. Then, like icing on the cake, Dean was ready to give Ellen a kiss when she told him she was going to start bringing Jo in early with her , as well. It was a perfect way of guaranteeing someone would always be there for Cas.

When “Heat of the Moment” by Asia went off Tuesday morning, Dean started to laugh. He rolled over and kissed Cas on the cheek. “Dude, Asia!”

Cas groaned, as per usual, then replied, “Yes.”

“You’re such a pleasure to be around in the morning,” he snarked then turned Cas’ alarm off. “Come on. Up! You gotta go take a shower.”

Cas grabbed the comforter and draped it over his head. “Five more minutes.”

“Nuh-uh. None of that bullshit this morning. We’ve got stops to make.”

Cas tossed the comforter off of himself and glared at Dean. “You’re lucky you’re pretty.”

Dean smirked. “Just pretty?” he asked and placed a kiss on Cas’ lips.

A grin spread across Cas’ face. “Well, I would say other things, but we’d never leave the room,” he admitted and kissed Dean back.

Dean chuckled against Cas’ lips. “Alright, enough! Get up. We have morning breath, and you still have to shower. Don’t take too long. I’ve gotta perfect this,” he said as he waved a hand over himself.

Cas scoffed. “Yeah,  ‘ cause that,” he waved a hand over Dean, “is not already perfect when it wakes up.”

Dean blushed. “Get up.”

“Fine,” Cas grumbled and rolled out of bed.

While Cas took his sweet ass time in the shower, Dean went to work styling his hair. He still had to rinse his face and brush his teeth, but apparently, Cas was less of a morning person than he originally anticipated.  Dean was sitting at the edge of the bed playing “My Singing Monsters , ” patiently waiting when Cas entered the room.

Dean threw his head back and groaned. “Finally! I was about to send in a search party to come to get you. What took yo…”

Dean’s mouth went dry as he turned around and took an obscenely long gander at Cas.  _ Holy fucking shit. _

Cas was standing near his closet door with nothing but a towel wrapped around his hips. “What?” he asked, knowingly.

The angry scar on Cas’ abdomen did nothing to deface the body he had been hiding underneath the never-ending band t-shirts for months now. Dean let his gaze soak in every inch of Cas which wasn’t currently being concealed by the towel. Cas had, by definition, a runner’s physique. He wasn’t muscular or bulky, but his ivory skin was tight yet supple in all the right places. When Dean’s eyes landed on the thin line of hair leading down to what he could only assume was just as delectable as the rest of Cas, Dean was brought out of his perusal by snapping fingers.

“What?!” he asked, still mildly dazed.

Cas was wearing a shit-eating grin. “Like what you see?”

Dean swallowed hard, grabbed his clothes and his pomade, then couldn’t help but burst out, “I gotta take a shower.”

“But you just took one la…”

“Don’t care. I’ll be quick,” he blurted out then darted down the hall to the bathroom.

The frigid water didn’t entirely solve the issue growing in Dean’s pajama pants. However, what did help was Gabriel entering the bathroom while he was in the shower.

“Hey, bro. Good luck at school today. Dean’s taking you right?” Gabriel inquired as he dropped the lid to the toilet.

“Not Cas, Gabe,” Dean uttered as he shivered from the ice-cold water.

“Woah!” Gabriel exclaimed. “What the hell?! How many showers do you need to take man? Didn’t you just take one last night?!”

“Blame your brother,” he snarled.

“Oh, ew. I don’t need to know about you and my brother doing shit!” Gabriel snapped.

Dean rolled his eyes. “We didn’t do anything, Gabe. I’m taking a… um… cold shower,” he stuttered.

Gabriel barked out a laugh. “Gotcha all riled up and left ya hanging, huh?”

“Yup,” Dean replied as he smacked his lips at the “p.”

Gabriel guffawed. “Well, Dean-o, good luck with that.”

Dean reached his arm outside of the curtain and flipped Gabriel the bird.

Which, of course, only made Gabriel laugh harder. “Later.”

The door was closed before Dean had a chance to respond.  _ Asshole. _

Luckily, the shower didn’t fuck up Dean’s hair.  _ That would have a pain in the ass to take care of again. _ He toweled off, brushed his teeth, and quickly got dressed before he went back to Cas’ room.

Cas, now fully dressed in his jeans and t-shirt, was wearing a face-splitting grin when Dean entered the room. “Did you enjoy your shower?”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Cas. “You’re evil.”

“I seriously forgot to take my clothing with me to the bathroom. I didn’t mean to get you all hot and bothered,” Cas admitted with all sincerity.

Dean grabbed his oxfords off of the floor then sat down at Cas’ desk to put them on. He fussed with the laces, feeling Cas’ eyes on him. When he looked up, Cas was staring at him like someone kicked his puppy. Dean sighed. “You seriously have no idea how fucking hot you are, do you?”

Cas slowly approached Dean with a coy smile. “Well, if you keep looking at me like you did this morning, I might start believing you.”

Dean rolled his eyes as he finished tying his shoes. He stood up and placed his hands on Cas’ hips. He made sure their eyes had met before he spoke. “Start believing it now. I don’t lie to you, Cas. I made a promise. I intend to keep it. So, accept the fact that your fucking gorgeous and don’t do that to me again.” He raised an eyebrow in thought, then smirked. “Well, unless we don’t have places to be. ‘Cause I’m completely okay with holding shit up by seeing all of that again then,” he beamed, then gave Cas a quick peck on the lips.

Cas put his hand at the nape of Dean’s neck and pulled him in for another kiss.

Dean gently pushed him away. “What did we just talk about?” he asked in mock disappointment.

Cas pouted. “Okay,” he said , sounding dejected.

“I’ll make it up to you later,” Dean promised.

Cas planted a kiss on Dean’s lips then whispered, “You better.”

Dean kissed Cas one final time. “Alright, enough nauseating chick flick moments,” he admonished with feigned annoyance. “We got places to be, and it’s,” he grabbed his cell off of the desk to check the time, “6:15. Come on, Cas. We said 6:10 the latest. Do you see what your sexy ass does?”

Cas shrugged as he grabbed his backpack. “Well, apparently, like you, I can’t help it. So, let’s go and pick up Charlie.”

_ He’s going to be the death of me. _

After they picked Charlie up , they stopped for bagels and coffee, well, tea for Cas. While they were there, Charlie was whispering something to Cas. Whatever she said was making Cas blush. Dean wasn’t sure if it had something to do with what happened this morning.  _ God, I hope not. _

Even though it was Cas’ first day back, Dean could never pass up a chance to play in the auditorium. Once Dean started to sleep in Cas’ bed more than his own, he began forgoing his time in the auditorium every morning. The way Cas’ nose scrunched up the first time he tried to leave was too adorable for words.  _ Any more of that crap, Winchester, and you might as well grow a vagina to go with the pink panties you own… which you totally don’t wear... on occasion. _ However, Cas’ handsome face was the main reason why this would be the first time in three and a half weeks he would be playing underneath the spotlight of the auditorium.

When all of the appropriate lights were on, Dean made his way back to the stage. As he got closer to the stage, he noticed Cas was clearly uncomfortable and whatever the girls were carrying on about, they were not letting it go. Without a second guess, Dean picked up his pace.

As soon as he made it to the stage , he asked, “Hey! What are you guys arguing about?”.

“Well, I asked Castiel to play the piano, and he’s being an ass about it,” Charlie answered. “Apparently, even though his application for NYU is in the mail, he still refuses to play for anyone.”

_ Ugh, that doesn’t mean he’s ready to play in front of people yet.  _ “Don’t force him to do something he doesn’t want to do.”

Charlie threw her hands on her hips. “Have you ever heard him play the piano or sing?”

“Yeah, I’ve heard him sing. The only time I’ve ever heard him play anything is during music theory , w hich doesn’t really count,” he replied as he rubbed the back of his neck.

“Doesn’t he have a beautiful voice? Because I think he’s forgotten how glorious it truly is.” Charlie glared at Cas as she finished.

_ I’ve only heard him singing Disney tunes, but I think he’s forgotten, too, Charlie.  _ “Beautiful and glorious, no offense, Charlie, are understatements.”

“Really?” Cas asked, his voice small.

Dean smiled crookedly at Castiel. “Yeah, Cas. I’m pretty sure I once told you that you put Prince Phillip to shame.”

Cas blushed. “I thought you were joking.”

_ Seriously, angel? What did I say this morning? I don’t lie to you.  _ “I wasn’t. I don’t joke about music.”

“Pleeeease, Castiel!” Charlie pleaded. “Just this once, then I won’t bother you anymore.”

Cas searched everyone’s faces. “All right,” Castiel sighed, conceding to his fate.

Dean watched as Cas’ entire body started to shiver.  _ The last time he played the piano in a school auditorium was when… Shit, should I go sit with him? He probably needs someone. _

Cas took a deep breath. “So, what am I playing?”

“Play whatever you want,” Jo offered.

Cas smirked. “Well, in that case.” His fingers stretched over the keys as he started to the biggest bunch of nonsense imaginable. “‘I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts, deedalee, deedalee. There they are…’”

“NO!” Jo and Charlie barked in unison.

Castiel snickered. “Hey! You told me to play whatever I want to play. I did precisely what you told me to do. So, whose fault is it really?”

Charlie scoffed. “Come on, Castiel. Be at least a little serious about this.”

_ Cas, stop being a little shit, _ Dean thought as he rolled his eyes. After some deliberation, Dean made up his mind and decided to go sit next to Cas.

When Dean took his seat, Cas scowled.

_ Not trying to ruin your day, angel.  _ “Why don’t you play a Beatles song? I’m sure you know a few of those,” Dean suggested with a sweet smile.

Cas huffed out a sigh. “Well, if you want me to be serious about it, there is one song I greatly enjoy playing. It was the very first song I ever heard by The Beatles.”

_ Can’t pass up this opportunity.  _ “Is it ‘Love Me Do’?”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “No, Dean. My life is not a Bad Company song. Plus, my name is not Johnny.”

_ I love that he got that. _ Dean nudged him. “You know I’m joking.”

“Play it for us, Castiel,” Charlie requested as she leaned up against the piano.

When Cas told them he was going to play the first Beatles song he had ever heard, Dean thought maybe “I Want To Hold Your Hand” or “In My Life.” The last thing he ever expected was the song he used to hear every night before he went to sleep. Even after his mom died, he would still hum it or sing it. Whenever he felt alone or scared, or if Sammy was being fussy, which was more often than not, this song was always the first one that came to mind.

“Hey, Jude,” Cas began to sing, his voice slightly shaking, “Don’t make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better. Remember to let her into your heart; then you can start to make it better.”

Goosebumps started to raise on Dean’s skin. If it were possible, Dean was pretty sure every single hair on his skin was on end. He was terrified. Only Sam knew how much “Hey Jude” meant to him. Then, of course, out of nowhere, the person who has turned his entire world upside down, sits in front of a piano and plays the one song he still hears being sung to him in his dreams.  _ The last thing I ever heard her… Don’t think about that. Not right now. _

To add to the spectacle, Charlie joined in harmonizing with Cas as he played. A crooked smile played on Cas’ lips as the music flowed through him.

“And anytime you feel the pain, hey, Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders. For well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool by making his world a little colder.”

They sounded beautiful together, but anyone could sound beautiful singing or playing a song well. With Dean, music was more than sounding awesome, which, of course, they did. It was about feeling. Dean had to be able to feel the music. The musician’s passion had to be tangible. Whether it was an original or a revival, if there was no emotion, there was no music. It was a significant reason why Dean hated listening to modern music. There was no passion in music anymore, only money.

“So, let it out and let it in. Hey, Jude, begin. You're waiting for someone to perform with. And don't you know that it's just you? Hey, Jude, you'll do. The movement you need is on your shoulder.”

When Cas performs, it’s a multicolored display of emotions. Dean could feel every sharp, flat, and natural note as it burst through everything he had known and blasted it to smithereens. All of the anguish, malice, and torment, Cas had ever been through, was purified by the graceful way his voice and fingers moved through the song.

Just when Dean thought his heart was so full it could burst, Cas took the song to its crescendo then let his soul explode throughout the entire auditorium , b athing everyone with the light Cas had been holding inside of him for far too long. A crescendo which Jo and Charlie were more than happy to join in on. Clapping and singing “Hey, Jude” over and over in tandem with Cas.

Dean knew he was failing miserably at reigning in his emotions, but he couldn’t stop them. Listening to Cas play was too much. A few traitorous tears were streaming down his cheeks as Cas finished out the song with a broad smile plastered on his face.

Cas looked around at everyone beaming. Before he had a chance to look at Dean, and see the mess that Dean had made of himself, clapping came up from behind them.

“Well, it’s about damn time, suga’,” Ms. Moseley announced.

Evidently, while Cas was losing himself in the music, he had drawn an audience. Fifteen people were standing around Ms. Moseley, clapping and smiling right along with her.

Dean used the audience’s appearance as a distraction for him to walk away from the group to go shut off the lights.  _ It should be around that time anyway. I should get the ball rolling and get to work. _ He climbed the stairs to the lighting booth then through the lighting booth window; he observed from afar as everyone approached Cas to either give him a light pat on the back or in Ellen and Ms. Moseley’s case, a big hug.

One by one, Dean started to flip the switches to off on the lighting board. When he was done, he could hardly see anyone on the stage. He exited the room, locked the door behind him, then walked back up to the stage with his hands in his front pockets and head bowed.

The only people who were still on the stage when he got to it were Cas and Ms. Moseley. Jo and Charlie were leaving but spared him a wave as they exited.

Dean could feel Ms. Moseley’s scrutinizing gaze on him as he waved back to them. He glanced in her direction and instead of seeing contempt he saw compassion.”Good Morning, Ms. Moseley.”

Ms. Moseley grabbed Dean’s hand and held it between her own. When their eyes met, hers were filled with warmth. “I think you’ll find she is the reason for all of this, honey.”

Dean cleared his throat to hide his emotions. “What?”

Cas, as usual, tilted his head and squinted at Ms. Moseley in confusion. “I second that.”

“Talk to him, Dean,” she ordered as she pointed to Cas. “I think you know what I’m talkin’ about and you’re just actin’ stupid ‘cause I’m here.”

Cas turned his perplexed expression to Dean. “What is she talking about?”

Dean shrugged.  _ I kinda know, but she’s right _ _. _ _ I’m not talking about it while she’s here. _

Ms. Moseley scoffed. “You don’t have to tell me, boy. I’m leaving. You two talk,” she ordered, waving a pointer finger between the two of them. Before she left, she hugged Cas goodbye and patted Dean on the arm, then exited the auditorium without another word.

Dean looked down at his cell phone.  _ 7:07. I should probably get going. _

“So…” Cas paused. He cleared his throat. “Uh, what did you think?”

Dean put his cell phone back in his pocket but refused to look Cas in the eye.  _ You promised not to lie to him, Winchester. Nut up. _ Just like Cas, he cleared his throat before he began to speak. “There are a lot of things that are coming to mind right now. Things that, to be honest, I would prefer not to talk about while I’m at work.”

Cas’ eyebrows furrowed as a deep frown started to form on his face.

“No. No. Cas. Nothing bad. Far from it. Lightyears. You were awesome! Stupendous! Spectacular! It’s just…” he groaned.  _ God, I hate being this person. _ “Can we talk about it later?”

With the most despondent expression marring his gorgeous face, Cas nodded his head. “Yeah. I guess.”

Dean grabbed both sides of Cas face to kiss the sorrow off of it. After he placed a lingering kiss on Cas’ lips, he let their foreheads touch as he spoke. “Angel, what you just did, it means so much more to me than you know. That song is…” he had to stop himself from tearing up. “It was perfect,” he whispered. He kissed Cas once again , t his time only a peck.

When Dean released Cas’ face and took a step back, he saw fear in Cas’ brilliant sapphire eyes.

“No,  n o,  n o, Cas,” he stammered as he shook his head. He cupped Cas’ cheek with his hand. “Don’t think that way. Don’t.”

Cas took a step back. “We’ll talk later, Dean,” he said as he picked up his backpack then made a beeline towards the exit which led to the art corridor.

“Cas, wait!” Dean called after him.

Cas threw the door open, glared at Dean, and stormed out.

_ Way to fuck shit up, Dean. _

 

>>>>>>

 

The instant the first few lyrics left Castiel’s mouth, he felt Dean’s body stiffen. Usually, Castiel would stop what he was doing to ask Dean what was wrong, but like his, Aunt Amara told him on Thanksgiving, once he started he could never stop.

When Charlie joined in and harmonized with him, he wanted to grab her and hold her tight as a way of thanking her. The amount of adrenaline coursing through Castiel’s veins was probably far from healthy, but it only fueled his desire to play his heart out.

Every so often, Castiel would steal a glance at Dean through the corner of his eye. Every time, Castiel didn’t know how he felt about the way Dean was looking at either him, the piano, or the floor. Dean’s expression was a constant mixture of both terror and sorrow. Neither of those emotions was insinuating that Dean was enjoying what Castiel was playing.

As Castiel finished the song, the last thing he expected was the audience , which was now more than the three people who were there when he first started playing. Basically, the entire music department was there to watch him. As well as, randomly enough, the ceramics teacher, Mr. Harding.

Of course, Castiel wasn’t surprised when , as soon as the crowd surrounded him, Dean was nowhere to be found. After the way Dean was acting the entire time Castiel was playing, he was more shocked Dean didn’t up and run for the hills while he was still singing. Instead, as everyone commended him on his incredible impromptu performance, he watched as Dean made his way toward the lighting booth.

“I’m so proud of you, honey!” Ms. Moseley praised as she squeezed him tight.

A crooked smile spread across Castiel’s face. “Thank you, Ms. Moseley, but it was just me singing in the auditorium. Nothing special.”

Mr. Turner scoffed. “Bull sh…”

Ms. Harvelle smacked Mr. Turner upside the head shutting him up. “Language, Rufus.”

“What?! You know I’m right!” Mr. Turner protested.

Ms. Harvelle rolled her eyes. “Yeah, but you don’t have to cuss, Rufus.”

Mr. Turner muttered some very unsavory things as he exited the auditorium.

_ Thank you,  _ Castiel thought as he smiled.

Ms. Harvelle was the next person to wrap her arms around him in a hug. “You better being trying out for the musical, ya little shit,” she whispered in his ear. “I’ve got a part with your name on it.”

His eyes widened in fear. “No. No. I can’t, Ms. Harvelle.”

Ms. Harvelle held him at arm’s length. “You can and you will, sweetie.” She patted him on the arm a couple of times and left the auditorium.

“Jo and I are gonna go say hi to everyone quick. See ya later?” Charlie asked apprehensively.

Castiel waved them off. “Go. I’ll see you at lunch,” he promised with a smile.

Only Ms. Moseley was left on the stage with him as Dean approached them with a sullen expression.

Dean barely spared a look in Castiel’s direction before he greeted Ms. Moseley. ”Good Morning, Ms. Moseley.”

Ms. Moseley grabbed Dean’s hand and held it between her own, her eyes filled with compassion and empathy. “I think you’ll find she is the reason for all of this, honey.”

Castiel’s face screwed up in bemusement.  _ Huh? Who’s she? _

Dean cleared his throat. “What?”

_ Okay. So, it’s not just me who has no idea what’s going on. _ “I second that.”

“Talk to him, Dean,” she ordered as she pointed to Castiel. “I think you know what I’m talkin’ about and you’re just actin’ stupid ‘cause I’m here.”

_ What is he hiding from me? I thought he said no more lying?! _ “What is she talking about?”

Dean shrugged.

Ms. Moseley scoffed. “You don’t have to tell me, boy. I’m leaving. You two talk,” she said as she waved her pointer finger between the two of them.

_ WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!? Control yourself. You’re about to start overreacting, again. Deep breaths. _

Ms. Moseley hugged Castiel goodbye, patted Dean on the arm, then left without another word.

Dean was looking at his cellphone when Castiel decided to speak. “So…” he paused.  _ How do I approach this without sounding like a self-conscious pathetic imbecile? _ He cleared his throat, then continued.“Uh, what did you think?”

As Dean put his phone away, his focus remained on the stage floor.

_ Why won’t you look at me?! _

Much like what Castiel had done, Dean cleared his throat before he decided to appraise Castiel’s performance. “There are a lot of things that are coming to mind right now. Things that, to be honest, I would prefer not to talk about while I’m at work.”

_ God, he hated it… I knew it. I’m so stupid for thinking he would like what he heard. _

“No. No. Cas. Nothing bad. Far from bad. Lightyears. You were awesome! Stupendous! Spectacular! It’s just…” Dean groaned. “Can we talk about it later?”

_ Why are you lying to me, again? _ “Yeah. I guess.”

When Dean grabbed Castiel’s face to kiss him, it did nothing to calm his nerves. The kiss had a hidden message behind it which Castiel, for some odd reason, was not privy to. Rather than feeling comforted by the kiss, Castiel felt as if it was just some sort of show.  _ Fuck being here at the school! Tell me! _

Dean let their foreheads touch as he spoke. “Angel, what you just did, it means so much more to me than you know. That song is…It was perfect,” he whispered against Castiel’s mouth and placed a barely-there kiss on his lips.

Castiel heard the breath he took when he paused; it was stuttered and weak.  _ What is wrong?! Why aren’t you talking to me?! _

As Dean stepped away from Castiel, his eyes were tinged with despair. It was a sight Castiel never wanted to see.  _ Oh, God… Is he… Did I do something wrong? Is he… _

Dean’s eyes widened in panic. “No,  n o,  n o, Cas,” he stammered, shaking his head vigorously. His hand came up to cup Castiel’s cheek. “Don’t think that way. Don’t.”

_ How can I not, Dean? _ Castiel took a step back away from Dean. The hand that had just gently held Castiel’s face was still where it had been moments before he stepped away from Dean. “We’ll talk later, Dean,” he said, then picked up his backpack and stomped over to the exit which led to the art hallway.

“Cas, wait!”

The sound of Dean’s pained voice only frustrated Castiel further. He did not appreciate being lied to. Even though the door was far from light, Castiel threw it open. With one final scowl in Dean’s direction, he marched out of the auditorium and turned right towards the technology hallway.

Castiel glared at the floor as he strode angrily towards his first class. Someone grabbed his backpack and pulled him in the opposite direction. He was barely able to keep himself from falling as he stumbled backward with the force of the pull. Without looking behind him, he knew who it was. They were trying to drag him to one of the exits near the faculty room.

_ No! Not on my first day back you’re not!  _ As soon as Castiel felt steady enough on his feet, he removed his arms from his backpack. Then, he took off running.  _ Where am I going to go?! Where can I go? _ Even though the warning bell had started to sound throughout the school, Castiel was not going to turn back and head to the shop. He darted past the cafeteria and headed toward the music hallway.  His intentions were now to run to Ms. Moseley. As fate would have it, he ran into Dean first. Unfortunately for Dean, Castiel was not able to apply his breaks in time to stop and slammed into him.

By the grace of God, Dean was able to stabilize both of their steps without either of them falling. “Cas? What the hell? Why are you…” Blind fury filled Dean’s bright green eyes.

_ No… No!  _ “No! Dean, don’t!”

“You heard him,” Alastair hissed from behind him. “Don’t, Dean.”

Castiel could hear the sneer in the monster’s voice.  _ I’m saving his job and his career. Not you, you sick _ _ , _ _ sadistic fuck! _

Dean’s grimace held firm as he stared daggers at Alastair. “Give him his bag back, Al!” he demanded.

“Awww, I just wanted to have a little talk with him. That’s all,” Alastair singsonged with a pout.

“We all know you had no such intention, Alastair. Give me back my things!” Castiel ordered with conviction.

“You heard him, Mr. Lucif,” Ms. Harvelle barked from behind Dean and Castiel.

Alastair tossed the bag at Castiel’s feet and backed away from them with his hands up. As soon as he was around fifteen feet away, the same horrifying smile from Castiel's nightmares spread across Alastair's face. “Until later, Castiel.”

Dean wrapped his arm around Castiel’s shoulder. “You come near him, and I swear…” Dean was cut-off by the sound of the final bell ringing.

_ Saved by the bell! Watch what you say while your in this school, Dean! _

The second the bell finished ringing, Ms. Harvelle was the first to speak. “Get to class, Mr. Lucif,” she commanded.

When Alastair turned the corner, Castiel released a terrified breath he was not aware he had been holding. As he began to take short stuttered breaths, Castiel’s entire body started to shake.

“Ellen?” Dean asked voice drenched in concern.

Ms. Harvelle nodded in understanding. “Go into my office. I’ll be right back. Okay?”

Dean led the way to the office. Once they were inside, Dean brought him over to the couch and held him close.

Almost instantly, Castiel could feel himself calming down. As usual, Dean’s strong arms made him feel safe. “I’m sorry I got so angry. Do you forgive me?” he asked as he mumbled into Dean’s shirt.

A soft kiss was placed at the top of Castiel’s head. “Everything you have done, and will ever do, will always be beautiful in my eyes,” Dean whispered. “Don’t ever doubt or worry that what you showed me in the auditorium this morning would ever fall short of that, okay?”

Castiel nodded. “Do you promise to tell me why you reacted the way you did?”

Castiel felt the nod on the top of his head. “I tell you everything, Castiel. You’re my one and only exception. I made a promise to you. I will always keep it. I just can’t do it he…”

“I know,” Castiel interjected. “Work. I know better.” He placed his face into the crook of Dean’s neck and inhaled the familiar intoxicating scent of everything Dean was, further soothing his nerves. As he exhaled his breath, he placed a gentle kiss at the base of Dean’ neck, then rested his head on Dean’s shoulder.

A shiver ran through Dean’s body. “Don’t start things you can’t finish, Cas,” Dean breathed.

Castiel huffed out a small laugh. “I wasn’t trying to start anything. Mind out of the gutter, Winchester.”

Dean shook his head then planted another kiss at the top of Castiel’s head. “Your sexy ass has caused me to seek real estate in that bitch, so don’t expect it to vacate any time soon, Shurley.”

Castiel chuckled. “Now, look who's starting things they can’t finish.”

The office door opened. Sam was the first to enter.

Castiel removed himself from Dean’s side before Ms. Harvelle entered, instantly missing the warmth and comfort of Dean’s embrace. He knew Sam coming in first was Ms. Harvelle’s way of saying “See no evil, speak no evil.”

Mr. Singer and Ms. Harvelle shortly followed him in. Everyone took a seat.

“What the hell are you doing here, Sam?” Dean asked.

Sam glared at his brother. “He’s my friend! I heard what was happening and I’m not going to be left behind. You never know, I may be able to help!”

Castiel placed his hand gently on Dean’s shoulder. “Leave him alone. He has a point.”

Dean grumbled something indiscernible and left it at that.

“Let’s get this settled quick,” Mr. Singer exhorted. “Rufus is watching my class. He’s just as pissed about this bullshit as we are and I don’t want my students payin’ for his ornery ass.”

Ms. Harvelle nodded her head in agreement. “Noted.”

Dean inhaled a deep breath to calm himself. “So, apparently, the measures we all took this morning won’t be enough. Now, I hate to sound like a mother or some shit, but I’m sorry , Cas, you need to be under constant supervision while you’re here.”

Castiel nodded. “Well, what do you suggest we do?”

“Do you have someone you can walk with before and after every class?” Sam inquired.

Castiel shook his head. “No. Not every class.”

“Fuck,” Dean uttered.

Ms. Harvelle held up a hand in pause to Dean. “Which classes?” she asked calmly.

“After Italian, as I head to choir or band, there is about a minute or so that I am not walking with someone. Then , in the morning , from Physics to English.”

“Frank is your physics teacher, right?” Mr. Singer inquired.

“Yes.”

“Good,” Mr. Singer replied. “He’s a buddy of mine. I’ll talk to him and see what we can figure out there.”

“Actually, that may not be necessary. Jo has gym during the third period,” Ms. Harvelle supplied. “The gym isn’t too far from there. Her next class is fashion and merchandising, which is right near Donna’s classroom.”

_ Seriously? Jo takes fashion and merchandising? _

From what Castiel could tell, everyone else in the room shared his surprise.

“She needed an elective,” Ms. Harvelle answered everyone’s internal question. “She couldn’t get into suspense and the supernatural until the second semester. Which doesn’t start until mid-January after finals. Trust me when I say she has been complaining for almost four months now.”

“Okay…” Dean said with a nod. “And Cas, um, just so you know… I’m not a creeper. I swear, but I’ve kinda been... Well, let’s just say you have someone there when you leave Italian for now.”

“Dean?” Sam questioned, earning Dean’s attention. “That is the quintessential definition of being a creeper.”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Sam. “Shut up, Samantha.”

Sam glared at Dean. “Jerk.”

“Bit…”

“Enough!” Ms. Harvelle snapped.

Sam faced Castiel. “Well, you know Max, right?”

_ How can I not? The guy may be younger than me, but he’s all sorts of tall, dark, and handsome.  _ “Yeah, of course.”

“Of course, huh?” Dean added, eyebrow raised in jealousy.

Castiel rolled his eyes.  _ Only want you, dumbass. _

Sam was giving Dean a bitch face before he explained his inquiry.

“Anyway, he has French during the eighth period. I could talk to him about perhaps walking with you. If you’re okay with him, that is,” Sam offered.

“That’s perfect. Thank you, Sam,” Castiel responded with a smile.

Once Ms. Harvelle received a reply from Jo confirming she had absolutely no problem being his escort and Sam agreed to talk to Max seventh period during calculus, Ms. Harvelle dismissed everyone from her office and sent them on their way.

Dean made the short journey with Sam, Mr. Singer, and Castiel to the shop. Unfortunately, since they were in the hallway, Dean and Castiel could not share the kiss goodbye they both so obviously wanted.

“Promise me you will text me when you are safe in every class,” Dean begged.

“Not a problem.”

Apparently, Dean was not going to let the hallway keep him from at least hugging Castiel. “I won’t let him hurt you, Castiel. Not again. I swear,” Dean promised.

_ Eventually, Dean, he’s going to find me alone. When that happens, he will kill me. _ Castiel squeezed Dean then released him as Castiel plastered a smile on his face. It didn’t come close to reaching his eyes. “I know.”

An encouraging grin that almost happened was present in Dean’s eyes.

_ I have faith in you, Dean, but I know I’m existing on borrowed time right now. _

“See you later?” Dean asked.

Castiel nodded. “Bye, Dean.” He adjusted the backpack on his shoulder, gave Dean one final smile, and entered the shop. He was already dreading the day , n ot to mention the rest of the school year.

_ Alastair has been winning for years. It looks like that’s not changing anytime soon. _

After the insanity of the morning, the rest of Castiel’s day seemed to drag. Besides everyone being on high alert around him, the school hadn’t changed at all since he was last there. Luckily, Castiel stayed on top of his classwork while he was out, so he had no problem following along with the rest of the students in his class. If anything, he was ahead of them. Castiel had an annoying habit of reading ahead. The teachers didn’t have a problem with him doing that; it was more his classmates who were annoyed by him knowing the answer to every question they were asked. Especially in English class.  _ I’ve already read Hamlet three times, so, of course, I know all of the answers. I love Shakespeare. _

The most irritating part about being back to school was Castiel’s inability to touch or kiss Dean anytime he wanted. When he was home, holding his hand or kissing each other breathless, and silly once, was okay. It was normal. Not being able to kiss him while they walked to music theory with Alfie was torture. As soon as he exited the classroom, there Dean was his hands in his front pockets, leaning against the wall outside of the door. _Why do you have to smile at me like that, too? You know what it does to me_. It took an enormous amount of self-control  not to shove Dean up against the wall and take what he had wanted since Alastair tried to attack him earlier.

Lunch was pretty standard. What he was not expecting, even though he should have, was the damn near violent way Meg glared at Ruby. Several times, Meg went off on a tirade about how she wanted to kill Ruby. Her exact words were, “I want to kill the rancid cunt. The amount of time I wasted on her... I could stab myself.”

According to Sam, Meg had been reciting something along those lines for the last month or so. “Ruby doesn’t even have to be near us,” he explained as Sam walked him to history. “Just the mere fact that Ruby is in the same room with us…” he paused then scoffed. “Who am I kidding? It doesn’t even have to be in the same room. Just because Ruby is in the same school, town, state, country, hemisphere, etcetera. Ruby fucking existing is her problem.”

Castiel shook his head. “Well, she’s got one thing right. She wasted way too much time on Ruby.”

Sam nodded. “Yeah, so did I,” he added with a bow of his head.

_ I am not sugar coating this for him. I think I’m entitled to be blunt.  _ “Well, not like we didn’t warn you, Sam.”

Sam shrugged. “Obviously, I had to learn the hard way.”

_ He’s like a sad puppy.  _ Castiel placed his hand on Sam’s shoulder.  _ God, he really is too tall for me to be doing this.  _ “Well, Sam, sometimes the person people tell you to stay away from actually does end up working out. So, I can understand why you tried.”

Of course, trying to comfort Sam didn’t help. Castiel received a bitch face for his attempt at cheering Sam up.

“Not everyone is you and Dean, ya know.”

“I was just trying to help, Sam,” Castiel explained, with his hands up. “ And I know not everyone is Dean and me. We’re an exception,” he said with a blush.

Sam rolled his eyes. “You two are nauseating.”

As they approached Castiel’s next class, Castiel shook his head in exasperation. “Later, Sam.”

The seventh period was horrible. Castiel had forgotten how much Dr. Morrison loved to hear himself speak. College Italian wasn’t all that bad. Like English class earlier, he was much further into  _ La Divina Comedia _ than everyone else in the class. They were still reading  _ Inferno _ . Castiel, on the other hand, had already finished  _ Inferno _ and was halfway through translating  _ Purgatorio _ .

Castiel wasn’t enjoying _Purgatorio_ half as much as _Inferno_. There were thousands of reasons why, but his favorite was Dante’s theory of the Devil being surrounded by a pool of ice. Even more interesting was Satan’s three faces. Each mouth was filled with the worst offenders up to Dante’s point in history. _Maybe Alastair will end up being one of the people in Satan’s mouth._ _Knowing my luck, the demon will enjoy it. He’ll consider it a religious experience or something._

Once Italian class was over, Castiel was excited to go to band. Not only was he going to be able to see Dean again, but band was also one of his favorite classes.

“Hey, Castiel,” a deep voice said from behind him as he exited the classroom.

When he turned around, he was greeted by Max Banes’ bright smiling face. “Hello, Max. How are you?” he asked as he beamed back.

Max gave him a once-over. “Great now,” he replied with a smirk.

Castiel laughed. “I appreciate the gesture, but I am  **very** taken.”

Max pouted. “Hmm, really? By who?”

_ Change the subject right now, Castiel. _ With another smile, he completely avoided answering the inquiry. “So, how’s everything going?”

Max raised an eyebrow at Castiel. “Way to not ignore my question.”

“I can’t answer it. So, it’s better for me not to respond. Let’s just say I’m taken,” Castiel mentioned with a grin.

Max shrugged. “Okay. Well, to answer  **your** question, things are well. I’m excited about the musical. Are you trying out?”

Castiel scoffed. “Yeah, no.”

Max’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Really? I heard you’re playing again. Why wouldn’t you?”

_ Jesus! Does news seriously travel that fast? There are over two-thousand students in this school. How the hell did he find out so soon? _ “Um… Yeah. I started playing again recently. We’re talking this morning kind of recent. I don’t think I’m ready for something of that magnitude yet.”

“It’s  _ RENT _ ! Fuck being ready for it. We’re made for this musical!” Max exclaimed. “Hey, maybe you could be Angel!” he mentioned with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle.

Castiel shook his head.  _ He’s not gonna give up, is he?  _ “My voice is a little too deep for Angel, Max.”

Max shrugged. “Well, there are more parts than just Angel. You should definitely try out.”

“I’ll think about it,” he replied with a reciprocating shrug.

They said their goodbyes when they parted at the orchestra room, and Castiel continued on to the band room.

The band room, of course, had not changed. Castiel received quite a few more waves than he was expecting. He graciously waved back at all of them and walked over to take his usual seat in the room. Once he sat down and put his bag on the floor, he sought out Dean. Castiel knew Dean was in the room because, as creepy as it may sound, he could feel Dean’s eyes on him. It didn’t take long to find him. Their eyes met, and Castiel could feel the stress of the day melt away.  _ Only forty-five minutes and I can finally be with my boyfriend again. _

His reverie was interrupted by an incredibly boisterous greeting on behalf of Anna.

“CASTIEL!!!” she shouted as she entered the room. Anna was so excited to see Castiel she was hopping up and down with joy. She threw her arms around him. “Oh, my God! I have missed you so much! You have no fucking idea! It’s been miserable here without you!”

With a huge smile on his face, he hugged her back with a gentle squeeze. “I’ve missed you, too. It was horrible not being able to see you.”

“I know,” she said as she squeezed him as well. “I would have visited if I could. My mom thought Meg was going to be there twenty-four seven for some reason, so she didn’t want me to visit.”

Castiel chuckled. “Actually, she only visited me about three times. It was Charlie, Jo, Sam, and…”  _ Should you tell her? _ He decided it was probably a good idea to not mention Dean until after his birthday. Castiel trusted her. Still, the entire day the words “Dean is my boyfriend,” never left his mouth. He didn’t want anyone to know.  _ I don’t want him to risk everything for me. _ “Anyway, it’s okay. It was pretty boring most of the time. Watched a bunch of movies and…”

“Wait,” Anna interjected, holding up her hand. “You watched movies? Did the earth stop spinning or something?”

Castiel’s face screwed up in bemusement. “No. I didn’t really have much else to do. I finished my homework fairly quick. I had to entertain myself in some way.”

Anna crossed her arms over her chest and arched an eyebrow at him. “Uh-huh…” a knowing grin spread across her face. She glanced in Dean’s direction. “Are you?” she asked when her gaze fell back on Castiel.

Castiel felt his face flush as bowed his head to hide his goofy smile. “Maybe…”

“You, asshole!” she admonished, smacking him on the arm.

He rubbed his arm where she hit. “Ouch.”

“You couldn’t text me and tell me?!”

“Not really supposed to talk about it, Anna,” he explained. “You know, considering his career and all.”

“Oh… makes sense,” she said as she nodded her head in understanding. “Still pissed.”

Castiel rolled his eyes in response.

Once their greeting was out of the way, Anna plopped down in her seat and asked him the usual small talk questions.  **_How are you? How are things? How is school going so far? What else have you been up to?_ **

With every question she asked, Castiel carefully avoided every answer which would include something to do with Dean. Unfortunately, it was a little more difficult than he thought it would be to refrain from answering any and all questions without involving Dean. Since the assault, Castiel’s life had quite literally been filled with everything Dean. His days, his nights, his bed…  _ Which is beyond awesome. _ Not being able to share everything with Anna was terrible.

Eventually, after Mr. Turner and Mr. Davies went over Disney and band candy sales, their conversation landed on the subject of the musical. Auditions were after school, and it seemed like everyone agreed with Max and Ms. Harvelle.

“Of course, you should try out for the musical! If you’re playing again , there is no reason for you to avoid the musical. When we were in middle school, you were in every single musical! This is your chance to get back to everything you love,” Anna exhorted.

“I don’t know,” he fretted. “Look, I’m not worried about the audition. Ms. Harvelle basically promised me a part. The audition would merely be a formality. The problem is I feel like I would be asking for trouble if I try out. I’m enough of a burden already. You have no idea the amount of stress everyone is putting themselves through to make sure I’m okay. Especially you know who,” he disclosed. “I feel like he’s trying to put on a brave face for me, but I know he’s worried. There is so much I wish I could tell you, but...” he waved his hand around the band room as a way to explain why he can’t continue.

Anna was staring off into the distance as if she was trying to figure out a way to solve his current dilemma. When she couldn’t think of anything, she shrugged, then focused her attention back on Castiel. “I don’t know, Castiel. Yeah, there may be a bunch of reasons for you to not try out, but there are plenty of reasons for you to do it,” she encouraged. “I’m going to be a hundred percent honest with you, Castiel. You’ve been emotionless for years now. Like a marble statue. Cold, no choice, only obedience. What sort of life is that?”

The comment was a smack to the face.  _ I have experienced a vast array of emotions! I am far from apathetic!  _ “That is not true!” he argued.

“Really? Then tell me, Castiel, besides the times Charlie had forced you to go out and do things with her when have you done anything outside of school since the eighth grade?”

“I’ve done plenty of stuff with…”

“Family gatherings don’t count either, Castiel. I’m talking about things you have done in the past four years for you. Not because someone asked you to come with them or you were obligated to go, but something you did for you because  **you** wanted to.”

No matter how hard he tried to find something, he couldn’t. All of the charity work he had done over the summer, yeah, he had enjoyed it, but at the end of the day, it was all for college applications. The marching band was definitely something he enjoyed, but it was something he did for school. There was not one single solitary memory he could think of where he did something because he wanted to. Everything he did was for Charlie or his family, not for him.  _ Shit… _

“That’s what I thought,” she boasted.

Castiel narrowed his eyes at her. “No reason to brag. I get it. I’m a hermit.”

“You’re not a hermit,” she chastised with a roll of her eyes. “Look, even though this is a school activity, it is still something you want to do. Everyone may be telling you to do it, but deep down you know everyone is telling you to because we knew how much you loved being on the stage before everything happened.”

_ I hate when other people are right… _

“Jo told me about this morning. You didn’t have to tell me, but I wanted you to tell me before I blurted it out,” she admitted. “She said when she and Charlie saw you play this morning, they agreed you had found solace in the keys of the piano. The part of you we all knew was missing, well… You became whole in the auditorium this morning. Don’t let him keep this from you. Not anymore.”

The small amount of fight he had left in him was gone. There was not a shred of doubt in her voice. She knew she was speaking the truth. Castiel knew she was right because he had felt it, too.

“I don’t expect you to do what I say. In the end, it comes down to what you want. I’m not going to force you to do som…”

“No,” Castiel interjected. “You’re right. Jo is right. You’re all right.”

Anna beamed. “So… Does that mean?”

Castiel huffed out a small breathy laugh. “Yeah… I’m gonna try out.”


	38. Chapter Thirty-Eight

Done. Dean was completely done. For weeks,  **weeks** , everyone told him not to let Alastair get to him. Eventually, Alastair would get what was coming to him. Yet, instead of Alastair getting what was coming to him, the bastard continued to make Cas’ life miserable. It was only Cas’ first day back, and the fucker appeared outside of the auditorium, ready to strike. Ready to take away Cas’ light, again.  _ What the fuck is wrong with this prick?! _

After the panic attack Dean suffered that morning, he was happy they had a plan to keep Cas as safe as possible. Thankfully, Cas did precisely what he agreed to do and texted Dean as soon as he was seated in every class. Even so, Dean ended up walking with Cas and his friend, Alfie, as they approached the music corridor. Once Alfie entered the auditorium for mixed choir, Dean followed Cas into the music theory classroom and sat down at the piano next to Cas.

The entire period, Dean was on edge thinking about the stress not only he was dealing with, but the stress Cas was inevitably suffering as well. It was beyond unfair, the torment Cas had been dealing with for years now. Dean could not understand for the life of him why Alastair was so dead set on making Cas’ life miserable. All he knew was that the psychopath had an unhealthy obsession with Cas.  _ There’s definitely something more to this. I gotta talk to Cas. _

After Dean brought Cas to the cafeteria, he hesitantly said goodbye before Cas entered. Of course, he tried to get Cas to join him in Ellen’s office during lunch, but Cas was adamantly trying not to let Alastair get to him.  _ He’s right. Cas needs to be able to live his life. Alastair has taken enough from him already. _

When lunch was over, Dean had no choice but to go to the band room. Even though he knew Cas was safe, he wanted to be sure of it. Dean wanted to make sure Cas made it to every class intact and Alastair free.

As the day went on, Dean was becoming more concerned about the months to come where he would be unable to make sure Cas was okay on a daily basis. What would he do when he was no longer working at the high school? The entire situation was impossible.  _ What happened to let Cas live his life? _

When the ninth period had finally arrived, and Cas entered the band room, a huge weight was lifted off of Dean’s shoulders. One single moment signified the end of the day. Soon he would be able to take Cas home, and they could map out a strategy for what was undoubtedly ahead of them. Dean had only two more weeks left at the high school. After that, Dean would be on winter break; then right before his birthday, a brand new semester would begin.  _ Fuck! How am I going to be here to pick him up every day? Shit… Didn’t he say he wanted to start driving to school? We’re all gonna have to talk about that. I don’t know how his parents feel about him driving to school, but I for one am not okay with it. _

Band class went reasonably quick. They weren’t really working on anything because the winter concert had happened last Friday.  _ Yeah, the fucker made him miss that, too. _ Most of the class was spent going over Disney permission slips and band candy. Not every student was going to be able to afford the entire trip or any of it, so the bandy candy sales were beyond important for those students.

Anna, who was jumping with joy when Castiel entered the band room, had sold the most candy out of everyone. Apparently, her father being a pastor helped. So far, she was able to raise enough money for ten students to go on the trip by selling candy to church parishioners. Anna, however, would not be going on the trip due to other obligations. Which, of course, translates into “I am not allowed to go.”

_ Geez, her parents really are strict. _

When class was over, Dean was ready to put the school in his rearview mirror and take Cas home. Even so, evidently, Cas was more popular than Cas initially thought and many of his classmates wanted to welcome him back before they said their goodbyes and headed towards the busses.

After everyone else had dispersed, except for Anna, Dean made his way over to Cas.

“Good luck, Castiel! I know you’ll do great,” Anna affirmed as she hugged Cas.

“Thanks, Anna,” Cas replied.

_ Huh? _

Anna waved goodbye to Dean and Cas, then exited the band room.

“Do great at what?” Dean asked.

Cas jumped as if he hadn’t known Dean was behind him. “Uh… well, I…” he stammered.

Dean cocked an eyebrow at Cas. “You what, Cas?”

Cas looked down at his knotted fingers, then rocked back and forth nervously on the balls of his feet. “Um, I’m trying out for the musical. After school, today.”

_ That’s news to me!  _ “When were you planning on telling me?”  _ Did that come out mean? I didn’t mean for it to come out that way. _ “What I mean is…” He ran his right hand through his hair then let it rest at the back of his neck. “I’m proud of you. After how beautifully you played this morning, this is a huge step, and it’s great, but I’m kinda your ride. You were planning on telling me about this, right?”

“Well, Anna helped talk me into it. Max started it!” Cas defended. “He was all excited about trying out for it. Then I told him I was on the fence about it. Ms. Harvelle basically promised me a part if I want it, but I just… I wasn’t sure. Max told me I should try out. Anna agreed.”

Dean nodded his head.  _ Let him live his life. This is a  _ **_massive_ ** _ step for him. Go with him! _ “Okay, well, I just have to finish up some stuff in here, but then I will be ready to join you. Okay?”

The smile that spread across Cas’ face alone would make this new added stress worth it. “Okay,” Cas beamed.

Dean smirked. “Give me five minutes, angel. I’ll be right back.”

Cas bowed his head to hide his blush.

_ I love that I can do that to him. He’s so adorable. God, I want to kiss him right now. Fucking high school. Fucking work. _

After receiving a final report from Rufus and Mick, Dean exited the band room with Cas then turned left to head to the auditorium where the auditions were being held. Dean beamed at his gorgeous boyfriend the entire way there. It broke his heart he had to spend the short journey to the auditorium wishing he was holding Cas’ hand. Something so simple was absolute bliss, and he had no choice but to accept it was not happening while he was working at the high school.

There was never a point in Dean’s life when he thought he would honestly enjoy holding someone’s hand. It was even more strange how pleasurable just holding Cas in his arms felt. No one else had ever measured up to half of what he felt for Cas. The thought alone was both terrifying and exhilarating.

Even though he hated how him working at the high school was keeping him from truly being with Cas, Dean knew his job was what brought him to Cas.  _ With the way our lives seem to work out, Cas would have eventually ended up in your life, especially since he is taking automotive care with Sam, and Bobby is the teacher. _

When Dean thought about chance encounters , like Dean delivering a part to Bobby could have happened, he had this eerie feeling maybe Ms. Moseley was right. Maybe his mom was the reason for Cas. As chick-flicky as it sounded, they were far more connected than he cared to admit. Sam, Alastair, marching band, all of it, would have eventually led him to Cas. Of course, Dean still needed further evidence to support her theory. Something tangible which proved without a shadow of a doubt there was some higher power at work here.  _ Yeah… that’ll happen. I’m overthinking everything. _

Before they entered the auditorium, Dean and Cas decided to enter separately. The last thing they needed was for anyone to assume they were there together. Dean could make up some excuse about how he was there to watch the auditions because he was a student teacher in the music department.  _ Absolute bullshit, of course. They all know why you’re there. _ Obviously, Cas was there to audition, so he had no reason to make up an excuse.

When Dean felt a comfortable amount of time had passed, he went into the auditorium and decided to take a seat next to Ellen.

As soon as he parked his ass in the seat next to her, she raised both of her eyebrows in curiosity. “What the hell are you doing her…” Ellen found the answer to her question when she saw Cas standing in front of her with Charlie’s arm wrapped around his waist. She rolled her eyes. “Of course, you’re here for him.”

“Pfft, no,” Dean denied with unmistakable sarcasm. “I’m here for the auditions. You know, ‘cause I’m a student teacher in the music department and shit.”

Ellen arched an eyebrow at Dean. “Uh-huh… my ass, Winchester.”

“Look, can you just pretend I’m here for educational reasons,” Dean pleaded. “I’m his ride home, and after this morning I don’t want to let him out of my sight. Please, Ellen, just play along. I just… please,” he begged.

“Alright. I will, but no funny business on school property. You got it?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “I haven’t done anything, Ellen.”  _ I want to, but I’m not stupid. _

“Let’s keep it that way. You have two more weeks here. After that, I don’t give a flying fuck what you two do… Well, as long as you don’t defile “The Swamp” as I know you and everyone else has.”

Dean laughed. “Just have the lock fixed. It’s that simple.”

Ellen scoffed. “Do you have any idea how many times I have begged maintenance to fix it? I’m sick of walking in on teenagers fucking, Dean. Makes me sick just thinking about it.”

“Damn it, Ellen,” he jested with a snap of his fingers. “You’ve destroyed my hopes and dreams,” he chuckled. “You know I have a car now if I truly…”

Ellen put her fingers in her ears. “LALALALA I can’t hear you!”

Dean shook his head and smiled brightly.  _ Well, it’s true.  _ The image of Cas spread out in the back seat of his baby flashed before his eyes. After seeing Cas’ body earlier, it wasn’t hard to imagine.  _ No! Get your mind out of the gutter before things start to get incredibly embarrassing and uncomfortable. _

There were at least one hundred students in the auditorium. Considering how many kids went to the high school, Dean expected a bigger turnout. He recognized a few of them: some from band, a couple from orchestra, a couple he had seen in the hallways around the school, and a few of them he recognized as either friends of Cas or Sam.

Now, Dean never considered himself a truly jealous person. Most of the time in relationships, he found himself indifferent to other people checking out whoever he was doing or dating at the time. As usual, he should have known better when it came to Cas.

One of Sam’s friends from orchestra was all over Cas. From a distance, Dean watched as Max laughed at everything Cas was saying, gently touching his arm, and threw his arm around Cas, enough times where Dean was ready to punch the guy in the face. Dean vaguely recalled Cas saying something along the lines of,  “Yeah, of course, I know Max,” earlier.  _ Cas looked like he liked him, too. _ Dean shook his head at the thought.  _ He’s going home with you, dumbass, right? _

As if Cas could hear what he was thinking across the room, he turned around and faced Dean. The look he was giving Dean clearly said, “ **Don’t be jealous.** ”

Dean shrugged then laughed in response to the look.

Cas rolled his eyes and turned back to his friends.

Around 2:35, Ellen called for everyone’s attention. She asked for them to take their seats, then she would call everyone one at a time.

Jo skipped over to them and handed her mom the sign-up sheet then went back to where Cas, Charlie, Max, Alicia, and,  _ wow Alfie? _ were sitting.

One by one, singers came and went. Some were incredible. Charlie belted out the “Wizard and I” and brought the entire house to their knees.

When Charlie was done singing, Dean leaned into Ellen and told her, “If you don’t cast her as Maureen after that, no offense, you’re an idiot.”

Ellen scoffed. “You honestly think I didn’t come here without people already in mind? I had her cast as Maureen as soon as  _ RENT _ was approved. Her audition is just for shits and giggles,” she snickered.

Dean leaned back and nodded his head.  _ Good. _

Alicia, much to Dean’s surprise had a fantastic voice.  _ Fuck… Whitney’s got nothing on this chick! Shit! _

Cas, unfortunately, had to follow Alicia’s performance. However, in Dean’s opinion, nothing could ever match Cas’ effervescent presence. Cas approached the steps to the stage meekly with his head bowed. His entire being screamed “scared shitless” as he fidgeted with his fingers nervously.

_ Oh, angel, don’t be nervous! You got this! _

Cas approached the center of upstage and cleared his throat.

“Hello, Mr. Shurley,” Ellen greeted with a smile. “Start when you’re ready.”

Dean wasn’t even the one who was on the stage, but he was nervous. He could feel Cas’ apprehension and anxiety coming off of him in waves.

Unsurprisingly, Cas chose to sing a Beatles song. Just like Charlie, he brought everyone to his knees with his rendition of “Let It Be.”

Dean wasn’t as big of a fan of The Beatles as Cas was. The Beatles were one of the most influential bands of the twentieth century, so Dean undoubtedly appreciated their music. He understood their relevance in pop culture and music history. Still, he was more of a classic rock kind of guy. The Beatles had plenty of classics, but he only enjoyed about three of their albums. So, of course, he wasn’t blessed with the amount of Beatles factoids Cas was. However, the song “Let it Be” was one of the exceptions.

When the song, written by Paul McCartney, was released in 1970, there was a common misconception the song had religious undertones based on its lyrics. However, Paul wrote the song for his mother who had died when he was very young. Whenever Paul felt troubled, his mother would tell him to let it be. Or in other words, take a deep breath and relax, everything will be okay. In the song, Paul’s mother comes to him as an angel whispering the words she used to tell him when he was a child. Let it be.

As the song so clearly informs the listener, Paul’s mother’s name was Mary.

Needless to say, Dean knew if he was looking for further proof to support Ms. Moseley’s theory he had just received it in the form of Cas’ choice of audition song.

_ Have I ever told Cas my mother’s name?  _ Dean asked himself. After reviewing every conversation Dean had ever had with Cas, he discovered he never did. Whenever Dean brought up his mom, she was always just his mom, not Mary.  _ Well, shit… _

 

>>>>>>

 

The auditorium hadn’t changed since the morning, but it felt completely different than Castiel remembered. Maybe it had something to do with the reason why he was there, but it was somehow bigger yet smaller at the same time.

“Bestie?!?! You’re here!!!!” Charlie exclaimed as she darted in Castiel’s direction.

_ Oh, my God! Please don’t kill me with your hug. _

Arms that had no business being as strong as they were wrapped around Castiel as Charlie gave him the biggest of hugs. “I didn’t think you would actually come!” she babbled. Out of nowhere, she held him at arm’s length and scowled at him. “Wait. Are you here to audition? Or are you here to join stage crew?”

Castiel gave her a crooked smile. “I’m here to try out.”

“YES!!!!” Charlie crowed as she started to bounce up and down. “Oh, my God! This is fantastic! I didn’t think it was possible!”

“Well, it is possible, obviously, because I am here.”

Charlie wrapped an arm around his waist. She had initially tried for the shoulder but decided on his waist because she was too short. “I’m just happy to see you back in here.”

“I believe you should be thanking me for him being here, Charlie,” Max announced as he approached the both of them.

Charlie and Castiel met Max halfway, Charlie’s arm never leaving his waist. “Thank you, Max,” Charlie cooed. “I’ve missed him. Musicals haven’t been the same without him.”

“Couldn’t agree more,” Max concurred with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle in Castiel’s direction.

Castiel rolled his eyes internally at Max’s antics.  _ Should I even bother trying out if this is what I have to look forward to?  _ “Actually, you should thank Anna. She’s the one who truly convinced me to try out.”

Max laughed. “Well, then, thank you, Anna.”

“What did she say to convince you?” Charlie asked as she smiled up at him.

“Something along the lines of I’m a hermit who needs to get out more,” Castiel replied with a grin for his best friend.

Max playfully shoved Castiel’s shoulder. “You’re not a hermit. You just need to relax a bit,” he suggested — his hand brushing down Castiel’s forearm.

Castiel stepped away from Max.  _ You are making me all sorts of uncomfortable. Don’t touch me. Attractive or not, I will punch you. _

“Remind me to thank Anna, I guess,” Charlie added with a shrug.

“I will,” Castiel promised with a smile.

Max’s hand once again came to rest on Castiel’s arm. “What song are you thinking about singing?”

Castiel shrugged. Mainly to get Max’s hand off of him again. “Probably a Beatles song. I haven’t decided which one yet.”

Max chuckled. “Only you.”

Castiel’s lips were shaped into a forced smile, which he knew probably ended up looking more like he was holding in gas than smiling. “Mm-hmm.”

_ Ugh, please stop with the flirting, Max. _ Castiel turned around to seek comfort in Dean’s eyes.

The moment their eyes met, Castiel knew he would not find comfort in them. A fire fueled by fury and jealousy was burning in his emerald eyes.

_ How could he possibly think I want Max? I’ve known Max for years and have never once pursued him. Don’t be jealous, Dean. It’s obvious I will never want anyone but you. _

As if Dean could read his mind, he shrugged with a laugh which said, “ **Sorry, I can’t help it.** ”

Castiel rolled his eyes.  _ Dumbass. _

The moment Ellen called for everyone's attention, Castiel started to have a mild panic attack.  _ Oh, God! What am I doing here? What the hell was I thinking?!?! Or was I even thinking at all? I can’t do this. I can’t do this! _

When they took their seat, in an attempt to calm Castiel down, Charlie laid a hand on his knee and squeezed. “You got this, bestie! Stop stressing out!”

“I can’t help it,” he admitted. “I have a million things I’m worried about right now. Not just the audition. I can deal with the audition. It’s the aftermath. Namely, Alastair. I’m giving him infinite more chances to get to me by even thinking about performing in this musical.”

Charlie put her hand on his shoulder. “Hey! Knock it off!” she ordered. “We are not going to let him get to you. None of us. When you get this part, you are going to have around forty people who will kick anyone’s ass for even thinking about touching you.”

“Then you should let Max know, too, while you’re at it. I think Dean may end up killing him if he so much as tries to flirt with me again,” Castiel snickered.

Charlie smacked him upside the head. “Stop changing the subject! You deserve to be happy, asshole! Don’t let what could happen to keep you from what you want to do. Okay?”

Castiel rubbed the back of his head. “Fine. Okay!”

Charlie gave him a shit-eating grin. “Good. Now, let’s kick this audition’s ass.”

Everyone did a phenomenal job. Charlie’s rendition of “Wizard and I” rocked the house, which he knew it would. Alicia, Max’s twin, gave him chills when she belted out “I Have Nothing” by the illustrious Whitney Houston.  _ Holy Shit!! She’s been hiding in Treble Choir! What the hell?! _

“Mr. Shurley?”

_ Of course, I have to follow her performance… _

Charlie rubbed soothing circles onto Castiel’s back before he stood up and made his way to the stage.

The entire walk over to the stage was filled with the same thoughts he had before he took his seat. He wanted to kick himself in the head.  _ I really have no right being on a stage again. I haven’t been in front of people in years. Shit, what if I clam up and nothing comes out of my mouth? Oh my God! That is a serious possibility! _

He stood in the middle of the stage, then cleared his throat nervously.

“Hello, Mr. Shurley,” Ellen greeted with a smile. “Start when you’re ready.”

His defeatist mentality disappeared when he saw Dean’s bright and encouraging grin. Earlier, Dean had told him never to doubt or worry that everything he has ever done and will ever do is beautiful.

Before Castiel stepped onto the stage, he honestly didn’t have a clue as to what he was going to sing. All he knew was the song would most certainly be a Beatles song. With the memory of their morning in mind, he made his decision. “When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom, let it be.”

Just like earlier when Castiel performed “Hey Jude,” Dean’s body went stock still. His expression wasn’t so much horrified as mystified. Almost as if something he had been trying to work out had become even more perplexing than it already was. Castiel had no idea why his singing seemed to have this effect on Dean, but he carried with the song anyway.

There was nothing like singing in front of any amount of people on a stage. Castiel had forgotten how much he enjoyed the rush of adrenaline. The feeling of his heart pounding against his chest. The way his body would shake in the best and worst way. When he was in Marching Band, it was always just a taste of what he used to feel out on a stage. Of course, there was still a certain amount of excitement and anticipation before the impending performance, but what he finally realized, was what he felt during those moments was never enough. There was never enough jitters , n ever enough fear. The kind of terror he felt on the stage, performing, was what made him feel alive.

Alastair beat him down and frightened him to the point where he believed he wasn’t allowed to live. Being on a stage again, pushing himself to listen to everyone and audition, proved he was allowed to exist in this world with his friends and family.  _ I’m allowed to be happy like I used to be. _

As he brought the song to it’s close, Castiel smiled down at Dean with a silent thank you. If Castiel didn’t let this one person into his life, he wouldn’t be on that stage auditioning. Every day would have gone by as it always had before Dean’s clumsy key dropping ass barged into his life.  _ Thank you, for being the jerk who brought me out of my rut. _

After a round of applause, Castiel took his seat next to his best friend. Jitters and shakes were still coursing through his body as Charlie kissed him on the cheek.

“Missed you, bestie,” she whispered.

The rest of the auditions went by fairly quick. Most of the audition songs were far from original. Castiel heard “I Will Always Love You,” three times. If he had to listen to it one more time, he was pretty sure he would end up begging for it to stop.

Ezekiel was a surprise. He and Rachel did a duet of “You’re the One That I Want.” Castiel was pretty sure he had never seen a duet for an audition, but they did a fantastic job.

Max danced around the stage singing “Run and Tell That.” A few times he winked at Castiel. Especially when he sang the lyrics “Vanilla can be nice, but truth be told,” and everytime he sang “the darker the chocolate, the richer the taste.”

Castiel could practically feel Dean seething with rage. When he turned to his left, his assumptions were confirmed.

_ I’m gonna have to prove to you that you’re all I want later, aren’t I? _

The most surprising audition was someone Ms. Harvelle called “Miss Chambers.” Everyone sort of shrugged at one another when they heard her name called. A little brunette climbed the steps and exploded with her rendition of “When You’re Good to Mama.”

“Fuck!” Jo exclaimed. “Where the hell did this chick come from?!”

Charlie’s eyebrows shot up to the ceiling. “I have no idea.”

Apparently, Miss Chambers was the final audition because Ellen announced the cast list would be posted on the bulletin board by the library the Friday before winter break then dismissed them.

_ She doesn’t need that long. She just wants to torture all of us. _

Before he left, Castiel made sure to say goodbye to everyone. Most of them would soon undoubtedly be his cast mates.  _ Might as well be friendly to all of them. Rusty people skills or not. _

Shortly after Dean exited the auditorium, Castiel followed. He beamed at Dean as soon as he saw him waiting at the top of the steps.

There was an awkward silence between them. Most of it was due to what had happened earlier after Castiel sang for him at the piano.

Dean shot Castiel one of his heart-stopping crookedly smiles. “You’re an incredible singer, Cas. You blew me away with your audition. I know I’m not the only one who felt that way.”

With his head bowed, Castiel’s smile brightened further as he blushed.  _ He liked it. _ “Thank you, Dean. It means a lot to hear you say it.”

“Okay, angel,” he said as he grabbed Castiel’s bag off of his shoulder and threw it over his own, “let’s get you home.”

Castiel gave Dean a once-over. His eyebrows furrowed. “Where’s your stuff?”

“I put everything in the Impala before the ninth period.”

_ Ah…  _ “Well, thank you for carrying my things , e ven though it’s not necessary.”

Dean shook his head as he chuckled.

When they were out of the parking lot, Dean placed his hand in the middle of the front seat. Castiel laced their fingers together without question and beamed at Dean. The entire day it killed not to be able to do something so simple. “I missed this today,” Castiel admitted.

Dean squeezed his hand. “There are way too many things I missed today.”

_ Hmm… I know what I missed. _ “Yeah? Like what?” Castiel asked with a knowing smile.

When the light turned red at Kenmore Drive, Dean grabbed both sides of Castiel’s face and planted a lingering kiss on his lips. All of the stress of the day flowed out of him once their lips touched. The kiss was brief, due to the light turning green and someone honking a couple of times for them to move, but it was exactly what he needed.

_ I love his lips.  _  “Mmm,” Castiel hummed. “I needed a kiss, too. All day.”

“It sucked not being able to kiss you after what happened this morning. I’m so sorry, Cas. Alastair’s bullshit was the last thing you needed to deal with your first day back to school.”

Cas shrugged. “Unfortunately, as sad as it sounds, I expect his bullshit on a constant basis.”

“You shouldn’t have to.”

“I have no other choice, Dean,” he conceded as he shook his head. “At least you were there today.”

“I won’t be there after next week.”

Castiel took a moment to soak in Dean’s appearance. His face was etched with concern. The anxiety of the entire day was no longer being concealed.

Castiel weaved their hands together again. “Please stop worrying about me, Dean. You can’t control the world.”

“I can’t help it, Cas. I care a whole hell of a lot about you. I don’t want to lose you to someone like him,” Dean confessed as he gently squeezed Castiel’s hand.

When they pulled into the spot in front of Castiel’s house, he pulled Dean into his arms and kissed his neck. “You won’t lose me, Dean. I’m not going anywhere.”

“I almost lost you once because I was almost too late to stop him,” Dean croaked.

_ What is going on? He never lets his emotions get to him like this. Why is he rawer than I have ever seen him today? Is it because of me? Because I’m okay! I’m better than okay! Can’t he see that?  _ “Well, Dean, I’m stubborn as hell, and I will never give up without a fight. Plus, you kind of enlisted a bunch of people to escort me throughout the school,” Castiel clarified as he breathed out a small laugh.

Dean snorted. “That’s cause I’m stubborn as fuck, too. And maybe just a little overprotective.”

Castiel leaned back and arched an eyebrow at him.  _ Who the hell does he think he’s kidding? _ “A little?”

“Shut up!”

Castiel gave Dean a small smile then placed a kiss on his lips.  _ I know I shouldn’t push this right now, but I need to know. _ “So, are you going to talk to me about this morning?”

“Um… Do you seriously want to talk about this in the car?” Dean asked with trepidation as he observed their surrounding.

Castiel exhaled a deep breath. “Unless you want to deal with my mom listening in on our conversation or Hannah occupying your time for the next hour or two, then yeah. I think the car is a good idea.”

Dean sighed. “Fine.”

Castiel moved away and leaned his back up against the passenger door to get a good look at Dean.

“The song... well, songs at this point, remind me of my mom.”

Castiel eyebrows furrowed. “Both of them?”

Dean bowed his head. “Yeah, my mom’s name was Mary. ‘Let it Be’ is about Paul’s mom.”

Cas raised his eyebrows in surprise.  _ Shit… I had no idea. _

“Yeah, that’s right. I know Beatles factoids, too,” Dean said with a humorless chuckle.

_ Only Dean. Always trying to hide behind a laugh. _ “And the other?”

“My mom…” he paused and inhaled a stuttered breath. “Before she died, every night when she put me to bed, she would tell me angels were watching over me and sing ‘Hey, Jude’ as a lullaby. It was her favorite Beatles song.”

_ I can’t believe it _ .  _ Out of all of the Beatles song I could have picked I chose that one. _ “I’m so sorry, Dean. I had no idea.”

Dean gave Castiel a doleful smile. “It’s okay, Cas. I really love the song. I used to sing it to Sammy, too. It just… it holds a lot of memories and it sort of freaked me out the first song you ever played for me was the last…” He stopped and shook his head.

Castiel could see tears at the brims of Dean’s eyes.  _ Oh, no, Dean!  _ “It’s okay, Dean. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Castiel said as he slowly filled the space he had put between them before Dean explained why he acted the way he did earlier.

“I’m sorry, Cas… I know I made a promise to you, but I can’t with…” a stray tear streamed down his cheek.

Castiel kissed his cheek where the tear had fallen. “I’m never going to force you to tell me, Dean. You’ll tell me when or if you are ever ready.”

He huffed another humorless chuckle. “How did I get so lucky?”

Castiel shrugged. “You’re pretty.”

Dean shook his head. “Come on, gorgeous. Let’s go into the house. It’s fucking freezing out here.”

“It’s December in New York. Of course, it’s cold,” Cas said as he rolled his eyes.

Dean chuckled. “Alright, smartass. Let’s go inside.”

_ Nuh-uh. I’m not going anywhere until I right the wrongs of the day.  _ Castiel placed his right hand on the back of Dean’s neck and drew him into a passionate kiss. As usual, the kiss took on a life of its own as their tongues entwined with one another. Castiel had already discovered exactly how to set Dean off. Every chance he could get, he would make sure to hit every single button as they explored each other’s mouths.

Within minutes, or maybe it was less, Castiel was straddling Dean’s lap and had removed Dean’s jacket as if it had offended him. He threw the treacherous article of clothing onto the back seat.

Dean nearly ripped off Castiel’s jacket from the heat of the moment. He gripped the back of Castiel’s head by his hair and sucked on Castiel’s tongue.

The strength of Dean’s grip made every nerve in Castiel’s body fire off with unadulterated pleasure. The satisfaction from their close to pornographic make out session was only magnified when Dean grabbed the globes of Castiel’s ass. Both of them uttered obscene moans from the marvelous friction it had caused. Castiel couldn’t help but roll his hips back and forth to chase the feeling.

Castiel thumbed Dean’s nipples through his shirt arousing a guttural groan which encouraged Castiel to pursue things further. His hands moved to Dean’s belt which he, surprisingly, unbuckled without fumbling hands. When he was tugging at the bottom of Dean’s shirt to remove it, Dean placed his hands on Castiel’s to stop him.

_ No!! NO!!! WHY?!?!?!?!  _ “Come on, Dean,” Cas whimpered. “Please!”

Dean leaned his head back, giving Castiel access to his neck.

_ Don’t stop this, Dean! I want this! I need this!  _ Castiel nipped and sucked the spot right underneath Dean’s right earlobe. “I know you want to, Dean. I can feel it,” he whispered as he ground his hips down to rub against Dean’s erection.

“Oh, fuck, Cas.” Dean’s breathing was erratic. He wet his lips. “Don’t do this to me. I want you so bad, but your mom has fucking spidey senses. She’ll be out her…”

Castiel cut him off with a deep kiss, sucking on his tongue until he pulled back and nipped at Dean’s bottom lip. _ Fuck it, Dean! Fuck all of it! Please let us have this! _

Dean gently, yet at the same time forcefully, pushed Castiel away from him. “Cas! Fuck! Just think about this, okay? We start removing clothing, get really into it, not saying we aren’t already, but you know what I mean. Your mom comes out, catches us, and flips the fuck out. I don’t know about you, but I happen to like my dick where it is , w hich is attached to me.”

Castiel pouted.  _ We never get to do anything like this. _

Dean turned his head. “Nope. Nuh-uh. Your sad puppy dog eyes are not gonna work.”

Cas huffed out an exasperated breath. “Fine.”  _ We’re just destined to forever be stuck at sloppy first. _

“I want you, Cas, but I don’t want your mom, or any of your family for that matter, watching.”

Castiel rolled his eyes and reached into the back seat for both of their jackets. He handed Dean his jacket then put on his own. Once his jacket was on, he glared at Dean. “You’re making it up to me, mister. ‘Cause you are giving me some serious blue balls right now because of this.”

“Trust me, Cas, when I say it’s mutual.”

With one final kiss, they exited the car. They gave each other a once-over to make sure that nothing was out of place and that they didn’t look completely disheveled. When they finally felt comfortable with their appearance they entered the warm house and prepared to go over the stress of the day with his mom.  _ This is gonna suck _ .


	39. Chapter Thirty-Nine

For some odd reason, Cas’ parents were hardly surprised about how Cas’ first day back to school went. Almost as if, like Cas, they were expecting what happened to happen. Their words mirrored exactly what Cas had said before they entered the house.

“Sadly, Dean, I expected this,” Becky said with a scowl. “This butthole has been making my son’s life a living hell since the eighth grade. There was no way he was going to be Alastair - free today.”

Chuck nodded in agreement. “She’s right, Dean. I’m just happy you were the first person he ran into instead of one of Alastair’s lackeys. That was a significant possibility.”

_ How can they seriously be so calm about all of this?! _ “You do realize Cas is going to need constant supervision now that this has happened.”

“Yes, and as you have already explained, you set all of it up earlier today,” Becky reiterated. “Castiel is not alone in this world. He does have people who would and will gladly be there for him.”

Cas lightly placed a hand on Dean’s forearm. “Dean, we have every angle covered.”

Dean inhaled deeply. “What about when you’re rehearsing for the musical, Cas? What if you have to go to them…”

“The musical?” Chuck interjected.

Becky’s face brightened. “You tried out for the musical?”

Cas blushed. “Yes.”

Cas was instantly wrapped in simultaneous hugs from his parents.

“I can’t breathe,” he croaked, muffled by one of their arms.

Becky smacked a big kiss on his cheek before she released him. “We’re just so happy and proud of you, Castiel,” she explained.

“Thank you,” Cas face flushed a deeper crimson as he stared at his knotted fingers. “A few people pointed out how silly I was being, especially considering the musical is  _ RENT _ this year.”

“You love  _ RENT _ !” Chuck exclaimed. “What part do you think you’re going to get?”

Cas shrugged. “I don’t know. All I know is Ms. Harvelle told me she has a part for me if I tried out. That’s it.”

“Angel, maybe?” Becky suggested.

“His voice is too deep for Angel,” Dean added.

“I think Mark would be perfect,” Chuck said with a massive smile. “I am so calling your aunt! She’s going to be ecstatic! She may even fly out to watch you perform as she did in the past.”

Cas scoffed. “Don’t you think she’s a little too busy to come and watch her nephew perform in a high school musical?”

Chuck waved him off. “Pfft. She’d be there for you in a heartbeat. Plus, she’s going to be your boss when you graduate from college, so suck it up and deal with her coming to see you.”

Dean huffed in exasperation. “Am I the only one who is concerned about the Alastair situation?”

“You’re not the only one who is concerned about it, Dean!” Becky snapped. “Don’t take our excitement for our son’s growth as negligence or indifference. We are merely trying to acknowledge his accomplishment rather than stress the negatives of his life on a near constant basis. Castiel trying out for the musical is an enormous check in the win column for all of us. Alastair’s nonsense can be put on the back burner for now while we take a moment to celebrate his achievement.”

Dean shrank into his chair at the Shurley’s kitchen table.  _ I knew I fucking hated this table. I feel like I’m continually being reprimanded when I’m sitting here. _

Still, Dean knew Cas’ parents were right. Celebrating this accomplishment was crucial. There was always so much negativity in Cas’ life. He deserved to bask in the light of his triumphant return to the stage. Allegedly, according to Cas, in the Shurley household, celebrations were always commemorated with ice cream cake from Carvel. When Gabriel showed up two hours later with the cake, Dean knew he would always look forward to celebrating in the Shurley household.

Apparently, Cas losing the ability to perform was a loss for more than just Cas. When Dean approached Jo later on the subject of protecting Cas at rehearsals, he was informed that Cas used to play a part in every single musical the distract held. In 2008, Cas even played Chip, in  _ Beauty and the Beast _ at the high school.  _ I’m guessing that’s part of the reason why the entire music department was in the auditorium beaming at Cas like he hung the moon earlier. _

Wednesday played out a lot like Tuesday. The only difference was Cas had chorus instead of band. Even though Dean knew Cas would be safe there, his stomach didn’t settle until after he received the report and was able to pick Cas up in the choir room at the end of the day. Every time he saw Cas, he felt like he could finally breathe again.

Thursday was terrible. It was only a taste of what he knew was to come when he no longer worked at the high school. After he dropped Cas and Charlie off, most of his morning was spent having a panic attack at the shop. The guys at the shop must have gone into the office around thirty times to ask if everything was okay. He could only say “I’m fine” so many times before he felt like flipping the desk.

When it was time to go to class, he was both relieved and even more miserable than before. Yeah, he was getting out of the shop and away from prying eyes. However, now, he was going to be a half an hour, with mild traffic, away from Cas. Plus, if he thought the guys at the shop were terrible, they were sure to have nothing on Benny.

Of course, Dean was right about that. Benny felt his agitation from a mile away. Not that he was concealing it well, to begin with.

Benny slapped Dean’s knee and held it down. “Brotha, you’re giving me agita. Will you stop bouncing your leg?”

Dean removed his hand. “I’m tricking my cell phone into thinking I’ve taken more steps today than I actually have.”

“That only works if your phone isn’t sitting on the top of your desk,” Benny snarked with a chuckle.

Dean narrowed his eyes at Benny. “Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Has he texted you today?” Benny asked.

_ Of course, everyone knows why I’m freaking the fuck out today…  _ “Yes. About thirty times so far today. Only eight of those are because I asked him to.”

“So, why are you worried?”

Dean started bouncing his leg again. “‘Cause, Alastair’s a dick and has eyes everywhere. It takes only a second. I’m not there to…”

“Dean, no offense, the guy survived almost eighteen years without you in it. You realize that, right?”

“Survived is the keyword, Benny. I’m done with him just surviving. Alastair is keeping him from living,” Dean growled.

“Don’t do anything stupid, Dean,” Benny warned.

Dean rolled his eyes. “I’m not going to do anything stu…”

Their psychology professor started to glare at them, so they decided to cut the conversation short to keep from being berated by the witch.

Of course, the admonishing picked up where it left off as soon as they exited the classroom. Benny was insinuating Dean had a nasty habit of not listening and running off to do something stupid. He was right. Dean couldn’t deny him that, but he had way too many people telling him what was right and wrong as of late and he was sick of it.

On the way back to the high school, Dean stopped at Five Guys in Deer Park to pick up some burgers for Cas and him. The look on Cas’ face when he got into the Impala and smelled the oily deliciousness of the burgers and fries almost made the entire day’s stress worth it. When they got back to the house, and Cas moaned around the meaty goodness of the burger, it took every ounce of self-control Dean had to say fuck waiting and rip off Cas’ clothes.  _ We’ve been waiting for fucking ever to take the relationship further. My patience is wearing fucking thin, and my hand is getting tired! _

The closest they got to taking things to the next level was the Sunday night before Dean’s final week at the high school. Stress had been heavy during the entire week. They had a small disagreement about Dean being a little overprotective and jealous while they were lying in bed trying to wind down and go to sleep.

“Dean! You are up my ass constantly!” Cas scream whispered. “You know how much I care about you and appreciate you, but you’re driving me insane.”

“Look, I know you’ve known Al basically your entire life, but I’ve seen him do some seriously fucked up shit,” Dean defended with conviction.

Cas narrowed his eyes and glowered at Dean. “What? And I have never seen the darkness inside of him? Everything I have been through with that demon was nothing?”

Dean huffed in frustration. “You know what I mean.”

“No, Dean, I don’t. Tell me how what I’ve been through and what I’ve seen is nothing compared to what you’ve witnessed. ‘Cause; honestly, I don’t think you have any idea how horrible it is to be betrayed by someone who was nothing but nice to you up until they… they…” Cas struggled to continue as he took labored breaths.

Without having to think about it, Dean wrapped his arms around Cas as he tried to steady himself, breathing into the crook of Dean’s neck. “I’m sorry, angel. I didn’t mean to make you feel like what you went through meant nothing. Please forgive me,” he begged as he placed a kiss on the crown of Cas’ head. “Never think or feel like what you went through was anything less than a heinous crime and sickening offense against you. If I could do so, I would kill him for what he did to you alone. What he did in front of me was icing on the atrocious cake that is Alastair. ”

Cas shook his head. His soft hair tickling Dean’s mouth and nose. “Don’t even think about murdering someone for me. He’s not worth your life, Dean. I’m not wor…”

“Shut up!” Dean snapped. “I need you, Cas. I don’t know what I’d do if…” He shook his head. “Stop telling me you’re not worth it. Stop telling me you’re not worth the stress. You’re worth everything. Do you hear me?”

Cas nodded in understanding. He kissed Dean’s clavicle. “It goes both ways, Dean. You’re worth everything to me, too.”

“Pfft. You’re only saying shit like that because you’re trying to sweet talk me into changing the subject.”

Cas lifted his head and glowered at Dean. “No, I am merely stating a fact which has failed to get through your thick skull, you stubborn ass.”

He chuckled. “I’m an ass now?”

“Yes. A jealous one at that,” Cas chastised.

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed. “What?”

Cas scoffed. “You think I haven’t noticed the way you glare at Max everytime he walks with me in the hallway.”

Dean’s face blanched.  _ Fuck… _ “No…” he lied without a shred of conviction. He knew he was guilty of giving Max more than a few dirty looks.

“What happened to no lying, Dean?” Castiel asked. The timbre of his voice dropping an octave.

_ Fuck! His voice does things to me when he does that. _ “Have you seen the way he looks at you? He would gladly eat you alive if you gave him a chance.”

Cas gave him a bitch face. “Dean, I have known him for years.  **Years** ! If I wanted to pursue a romantic relationship with him, don’t you think I would have done so by now?”

“Yeah, I do, but…”

“Do you think I would ever betray your trust by being a philandering pig? Have we or have we not agreed to be monogamous?”

“Yes, we have, but…”

“Dean,” Cas interrupted, “stop being jealous. You are what I want. You are the one I need. Not him.”

“I trust you, Cas. I do not, however, trust him,” Dean explained.

Cas planted a lingering kiss on Dean’s lips, taking his breath away. When they parted, Cas breathed, “I don’t want anyone else’s lips or hands on me, except yours,” against Dean’s lips, then he kissed him again. This time only a peck. “Do you understand?”

Dean smirked. “You want my hands on you, Cas?”

Cas rolled his eyes. “I would think that would be thoroughly apparent at this point, assbutt.”

Dean snickered. “Ooo, I love it when you talk dirty to me.”

Cas pushed him away playfully. “Shut up!”

“Every time you call me an assbutt, I have to once again explain to you how you are literally calling me a butt butt or an ass ass,” he chuckled. “You can do better than that.”

“Well, you do have an exquisite ass,” he assessed as his eyes drifted down Dean’s body. “Maybe, I’m just trying to reiterate that fact everytime I call you assbutt.”

Dean let his hand wander down to Cas’ perfect rear. When his hand found what he was searching for, he grabbed hold of it and rubbed his growing erection against Cas’ crotch.

The whimper Cas released was delectable and encouraged Dean to take things a little further.

After Dean nibbled Cas’ earlobe, which drew a muted moan out of his boyfriend, he whispered, “I’m pretty sure this one here,” he squeezed the globe of Cas’ ass a little harder, “is the definition of sexy as fuck. My ‘exquisite’ ass has nothing on…”

Cas shut Dean up with a kiss.

When Dean ran his tongue along the seam of Cas’ mouth, Cas didn’t hesitate to give Dean the opening he so desperately needed. As soon as their tongues met, the same electricity he always felt started to overwhelm him.

Luckily, while his brain short-circuited, Cas never hesitated to take control. His hands moved to Dean’s ass where he reciprocated Dean’s earlier thrust with one of his own. The friction of their matching erections caused them to groan in unison. Thankfully, they both kept their volume as low as possible.

_ Fuck! I can’t take it anymore. _ Dean broke their kiss to rip off his shirt, then tugged at the bottom of Cas’ to get him to remove his own.

Cas happily removed his own, then grabbed the nape of Dean’s neck, pulling Dean on top of him, and crashed their lips together once more.

When their lips parted to catch their breath, Dean began to gently nip and suck a trail from Cas’ jaw to his neck; then he swept his tongue across Cas’ clavicle before he softly bit Cas pulse point.

Cas’ breath hitched, then he gripped the back of Dean’s head, pulling his short hairs in the process, forcing their lip to crash together once again. Suddenly, Cas rolled them over, so he was the one on top. He threw his right leg over Dean’s waist to straddle him, then proceeded to mimic what Dean had just done to him.

When Cas bit down on his neck, Dean demanded without thinking, “Harder!”

Apparently, Cas was happy to oblige. He bit then sucked a mark on to Dean’s neck. Cas slid his body down to Dean’s thighs as he ran his tongue down Dean’s chest where his lips latched onto one of his nipples.

“Fuck!” he hissed in ecstasy as he arched his back off of the bed.

Cas flicked his tongue over the nub a few times before he nibbled on it, then trailed his tongue across Dean’s chest to give the other one the same attention.

Dean ran his fingers through Cas’ hair as he gazed down at his boyfriend and watched Cas’ tongue swirl around his nipple. When those bright blue eyes glanced up at him, nearly black with desire, Dean threw his head back and groaned as quietly as he could.

Cas’ hand once again began to wander. His right hand roamed tauntingly slow down Dean’s stomach where Cas grabbed his cock through the pajama pants Dean instantly wished didn’t exist. He stroked Dean as he moaned around the nipple he was still paying close attention to.

“Fuck, please, Cas.”

He could feel the smirk around his nipple.  _ Fucking dick! I’ve been praying for this for  _ **_months_ ** _! _ Dean’s hand covered Cas’ where he began to work his cock in tandem with Cas’ movements. “You’re driving me insane!”

Cas removed his mouth from Dean’s nipple. He murmured against Dean’s mouth with a lascivious grin, “You love it.”

Dean closed the small space between them by grabbing the back of Cas’ head, then dove into Cas’ mouth. He broke the kiss temporarily to growl, “I’ve fucking wanted you from the moment I saw you. Don’t tease me!”

Those words seemed to set something off in Cas because the second the final word left Dean’s mouth, his hand was no longer over his pajama pants.

Dean’s breath hitched in his throat as soon as Cas’ hand grasped his dick. “Ah! Fuck!”

The feeling of Cas’ hand gliding over his cock was better than he had been imagining. The strength of his grip, the way he flicked his wrist at the perfect moments, Dean was experiencing nirvana in Cas’ hand.

“You’re so fucking sexy like this. I could cum just watching you,” Cas murmured as he continued to kiss Dean everywhere.

“Don’t stop, Cas. I’m so fucking close!”

Cas’ tongue once again entered his mouth, where their tongues did a dizzying dance with one another. The taste of Cas’ mouth caused Dean to dangle at the precipice of his impending orgasm. His body began to shiver. He felt as if he was on the brink of exploding after what felt like months of waiting.

“Are you going to cum?” Cas asked. His voice just above a whisper.

Dean could only nod.

“I want you to cum for me, okay?”

Dean nodded again.

“Castiel!”

A banging on the door ruined the moment as Dean was just about to have what he knew was going to be one of the best orgasms he ever had.  _ MOTHER FUCKER!!!! PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!! SON OF A BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _

“What the  **fuck** do you want, Gabriel?!” Castiel barked as his hand left Dean’s pants.

Dean internally whimpered when the warmth and pressure of Cas’ hand disappeared.  _ NO! COME ON!!! _ He screamed in his head, while externally trying to maintain the appearance of complete composure.

“Have you seen my graphing calculator?” Gabriel asked with humor in his voice.

_ Asshole fucking did it on purpose! _

Castiel groaned in exasperation. “I’m going to fucking kill you, Gabriel!”

“Only doing what I’m told, baby bro,” Gabriel replied as he blatantly laughed.

Castiel threw himself against the mattress. “I can’t fucking win!!!”

_ You’re telling me. My dick hates the world right now. _ “It’s okay, Cas,” he lied, trying to keep his voice sincere.

The glare Dean received from Cas was close to vicious. “You have  **got** to be fucking kidding me right now, right?”

Dean exhaled a deep breath. “I’m trying to make you feel better, angel,” he admitted. He looked down at his wilting dick which was once again ready to destroy to the universe. It was either that or his balls were going to explode from being taunted with a promise of release.

“I can never win, can I?” Castiel grumbled.

_ Pfft… You can’t win?! You can’t win?! I was three seconds away from cumming. _ Dean took a deep breath and sighed. He scooched in close to Cas so he could place his head over Cas’ heart. He could hear Cas’ heartbeat slowing down as he conceded to his fate. Dean kissed his chest. “I can wait.”

Cas scoffed. “Maybe you can. I can’t.”

Dean kissed Cas’ chest once more, then draped an arm over him. “Again, Cas, trying to make you feel better.”

“Hmm,” Cas mumbled. “It’s not working.”

Dean squeezed Cas as he moved impossibly closer to him. He lifted his head to kiss Cas’ jaw, then laid his head back down on Cas’ chest. “Try to get some rest.”

“Mm-hmm.”

Dean chuckled humorlessly. “Watch it, or you’re going to start sounding like me.”

A laugh rumbled in Cas’ chest. He kissed the top of Dean’s head, then wrapped his arms around him. “Goodnight, Dean.”

Dean yawned. “Night, Cas.”

Needless to say, if Dean didn’t get some relief sometime soon, he was going to detonate like a fucking atomic bomb. From what he could tell, Cas felt the same way.  _ I have no idea how to make this fucking work. I’m ready to fucking die! _

 

>>>>>>

 

Exasperated, annoyed, pissed off, irritated, inconvenienced, every word which could relate to the word frustrated, was precisely how Castiel felt. He was done. Done with having to be watched every moment of every day. Done dealing with everyone treating him like he was some delicate flower that had to be handled with extra care.  _ I may have been through some traumatic crap in my short life, but come on! _

Regardless of what Becky told Dean, she was just as bad as he was. Apparently, instead of getting the car he had been saving up for, Castiel would continue to receive rides from either Dean or his mom if Dean was unavailable, which would never happen,  _ Thankfully,  _ until further notice. He didn’t even want to think about how much of a hassle getting to rehearsals for the musical was going to be. Participating in the musical may have been a step in the right direction when it came to Castiel’s personal development, there was no question there, but for his sanity, well, that was a completely different issue.

Even though Castiel knew he was crazy for feeling this way, he found himself missing the weeks where he was stuck at home on the mend. At the time, he would have preferred to be at school. He thought he was going to go out of his mind being stuck in the house. However, now that he was back at school, he longed for the privacy and normalcy of being home. When he was home, no one worried about where he was every second of every day. Little did Dean and his mom know, Castiel had a group message set up for the both of them so he could inform them when he entered and left all of his classes. The way he set it up, they would only see his name in the texts. That way, when they responded saying thank you, they were just sending their reply to him. Of course, he understood their reasoning, but he was starting to feel like he had two moms instead of one.

The constant nuisance of texting the both of them was only part of his problem. Having Max walk him to band and chorus every day was an unmitigated disaster. Max was sweet to an unimaginable fault. He was the kind of guy who flirted just to flirt. It was part of who he was, and he honestly could not help doing it. Castiel found his flirting hysterical, especially since Max knew Castiel was very taken. Unfortunately, Dean saw it as if Max was trying to step in on his territory. Most of the time during their walk, he would find Dean either following them or staring daggers at the poor guy.

The first time Max mentioned it was the Friday after tryouts. “Sam’s brother seems to have a serious problem with me. The way he looks at me… You can tell me I’m crazy, I probably am, but is it just me or does he look like he’s foaming at the mouth every time he sees me?”

“It’s not just you,” Castiel grumbled.

“Did I do something to offend him or something?”

_ You can’t answer that question until after next Friday. _ “I don’t know. I can ask if you’d like.”  _ Even though I already know why. _

Max shook his head. “No. That’s not necessary. It’s just unsettling the way he stares at me as if I’ve offended him in some way. I’ve hardly talked to the guy since…” he chuckled. “Wow! I can’t even remember the last time I talked to him, and he looks at me like that.”

_ Ugh, I’m gonna have to have a talk with him. _ “I’m sorry, Max. I wish I could answer your question.”  _ Not lying. Really wish I could. _

Max shrugged. “It’s not your fault.”

_ Well… _ Castiel didn’t reply.

Sadly, Castiel had to wait until Sunday to talk to Dean about everything that had happened that week because Dean had band practice on Saturdays. Since they had a gig coming up, their jam session ran late. Luckily, when they finally did have their talk, it went well which was utterly unexpected.

Of course, he already knew why Dean was acting the way he was when it came to Alastair. However, he really did not appreciate the way Dean undermined the years of torment Castiel suffered because Alastair seemed to have a visceral need to control him. The agony he had to endure from the bullying alone would damage anyone. Even so, Alastair took it one step further by ripping Castiel’s innocence away from him in that locker room all of those years ago. Dean apologized about the way he had been acting, but Castiel understood and knew without questioning Dean would continue worrying about him. No matter how much Castiel hated his constant surveillance, he was just going to have to accept it until they figured out a way to resolve the Alastair issue.

Approaching the subject of Dean’s jealousy had been taking a delicious turn until Gabriel interrupted them. The way Castiel was able to take Dean apart with only his lips and his hands,  brought him to the brink of cumming untouched in his pants. He knew for a fact, he had never been so hard or turned on before in his life. If there had been an opportunity to steer their night towards something more, Castiel knew he would have taken it.

Talk about frustrated. In the past, with anyone else Castiel was remotely attracted to, he would fantasize about different scenarios with them. Once or twice, he had even experienced a wet dream, but those were about celebrities he knew he would never have a chance with. With Dean, he wanted to rip off his clothes and throw him up against a wall to take what he needed. Dear God, did he need it. Castiel knew the need was mutual. They had surpassed want weeks ago. Need was even putting things lightly. They were starting to approach desperately.

By the Friday before Castiel’s birthday, he was ready to rip his hair out. Since Sunday, every single attempt Dean and Castiel made to have some form of physical intimacy was thwarted by outside forces. Tuesday, while they were only making out in the car, Becky just  **had** to take the garbage pails to the street. Wednesday, Hannah knocked on his door incessantly for them to come out and play. Thankfully, on that occasion, he had locked the door. If he hadn’t planned ahead, Hannah would have seen things a five year should never see. When they got upstairs, his mom’s smile was close to mischievous.  _ You’re using my little sister now?! This is what we’ve come to? _

Obviously, Castiel couldn’t keep his mouth shut about his lack of a sex life around Charlie, and by extension Jo. After the final bell rang, Castiel, Jo, and Charlie made their way to the bulletin board near the library to find out what parts they were cast in for the musical. _Why Jo can’t just tell us is beyond me._ _The amount of convincing it took to get Dean to meet me here rather than make us wait was ridiculous._

On the way there, Castiel knew he was bitching about it, but he was genuinely concerned that he may end up exploding. “I can’t take it anymore! Every  **fucking** time we even get close to doing anything, someone interrupts us. If something doesn’t happen soon, I’m terrified that my dick may fall off. I am legitimately scared that I will end up with a serious medical condition where it disintegrates due to lack of use.”

Jo’s face screwed up in disgust. “I really don’t need to know this.”

“They’re your family, Castiel,” Charlie replied to Castiel’s complaints, completely ignoring Jo’s statement. “I understand where you’re coming from. What you’re going through is definitely aggravating, but try to put yourself in their shoes.”

“I don’t give a fuck about their shoes!” Castiel exclaimed. “Do you know how many time I’ve heard moaning and the sounds of a bed frame banging against the wall from Gabriel’s room?! Why is he allowed to do things like that with Kali in his room, but I can’t? How is that fair?”

“You’re seventeen, Castiel,” Jo supplied.

“I won’t be after tomorrow!” he snapped.

Charlie put her hand on Castiel’s shoulder as they began to climb the stairs toward the library. “You never know, then. Things may change once you turn eighteen. Just give it another day or so.”

Castiel slammed her with a bitch face which would have put Sam to shame. “Pfft. That’ll happen.”

Charlie stomped up the rest of the stairs and left Castiel behind. “I don’t know what to tell you, Castiel. Nothing I say seems to be making things any better.”

Castiel exhaled a deep breath and sighed. “I’m sorry, Charlie. I don’t mean to let out all of my frustration on you, but I’m on the brink of releasing a primal scream which would inevitably shatter every window of this school.”

Charlie turned to face Castiel and shrugged. “Well, again things may change after tomorrow.”

“Maybe. I’m just excited to be doing something tomorrow.”

Charlie’s and Jo’s faces lit up with matching radiant grins. “I know, right?!” they said in unison.

Charlie pointed her finger at Jo. “You owe me a… Well, I don’t like beer all that much. I do like root beer though. So, you owe me one of those.”

Jo planted a kiss on Charlie’s cheek. “You got it, babe.”

Castiel rolled his eyes.  _ Yeah, Dean and I spend too much time together, huh? Look who’s talking! _

Charlie blushed as she continued what she was planning to say. “I’m  **so** excited about going to see Raised from Perdition! Jo said they’re friggin awesome!”

Jo nodded in the way of confirmation. “They are. All of them are extremely talented individuals. Together, they’re mind-blowing.”

“I’ve heard Dean sing and play the guitar plenty of times, so I know he’s awe-inspiring. I can only imagine the people he has chosen as his bandmates are just as phenomenal as he is,” Castiel said with a crooked smile. “Dean’s extremely passionate when it comes to music, he wouldn’t perform with just anyone.”

Jo beamed at Castiel. “Well, they definitely meet Dean’s standards. I wonder if Benny is going to play the sax tomorrow. You wanna talk about talented?”

Castiel’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Dean didn’t tell me Benny plays the sax.”

Jo nodded. “Yeah, he’s fucking amazing, too. From what Benny told me, that’s actually how they met. Dean was walking past one of the practice rooms they have at the college or something, and Benny was rehearsing some jazz piece or some shit. Dean was so blown away by how well the guy can play, he entered the room and struck up a conversation. The rest is history.”

_ Damn… _ “I hope he plays, then.”

“FUCK YES!!!!” Charlie crowed.

“What?” Castiel and Jo asked in unison.

Charlie was wearing a face-splitting grin. “I’m Maureen!”

Jo cocked an eyebrow at Charlie. “Was there ever any doubt in your mind that you weren’t going to be?”

Charlie narrowed her eyes at her girlfriend. “Shut up.”

“Who am I playing?” Castiel asked as he stood in front of the list. His name was right at the top of the list. “Holy shit…”  _ Dad was right. _

The smile was now threatening to rip Charlie’s entire head in half. “I know, right?”

“Who is he playing?” Jo asked.

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed. “You seriously don’t know?”

“No. Contrary to everyone’s belief, my mom does not tell me everything,” she admonished.

“Mark, Mark, he’s Mark!” Charlie sang, mimicking the lyrics to the show ’ s song “Life Support.”

Jo’s eyebrows shot up to the ceiling. “Damn! That’s quite a return to the stage. One of the lead roles.”

He shook his head as he once again looked at the bulletin board. “Shit…”

“Well, looks like when we come back to from vacation we’re going to start rehearsals,” Charlie announced as she squinted at the list.

Castiel threw his head back and groaned. “Ugh… I know you’re super excited about all of this, but it’s going to be a serious pain in my ass.”

“Awwww, come on, Castiel!” Charlie whined. “It’s going to be a lot of fun. It’s been years since you’ve been part of the musical life! You’re going to have a blast!”

“I know I’m going to have fun. That’s not what’s going to be a pain in my ass. Scheduling with Dean and my mom is what’s going to kill me,” Castiel explained.

“It won’t be too bad,” Jo suggested. “I mean, yeah, it’s going to be a lot of work and probably a bit stressful, but the last two weeks have been about the same already, right?”

“Yeah, it has been,” Castiel sighed. “But the musical rehearsals… That is going to be a brand new batch of hell.”

Charlie started to rub soothing circles onto Castiel’s back. “You’re a worry wart and a Debby Downer. You know that, right?”

Castiel rolled his eyes and made his way back to the stairwell. When he was about to take the first step down the stairs, he chuckled humorlessly, then looked back at Charlie and Jo. “Hey, I just realized, Mark and I have one serious thing in common.”

Charlie’s eyebrows furrowed. “Yeah, and what’s that?”

“Our sex lives are basically nonexistent. Mark’s more so than mine, but you get the idea,” he said with a shrug.

Jo and Charlie shook their heads in unison, then pushed past him to walk down the stairs first.

“What?! It’s true!” he declared.

Jo scoffed. “Your sex life is definitely more active than some.”

All three of them paused on the steps as Charlie turned to glare at Jo. “Excuse me?”

Jo rolled her eyes. “Not us, hun. Did we or did we not just get off this morning in the…”

Castiel put his fingers in his ears and hummed. “I can’t hear you!”  _ Oh, God, do I not need to know any of this! _

The bright smile Charlie was wearing was evidence enough that something did indeed happen earlier. She blew a kiss at Jo. “And don’t you forget it, gorgeous.”

“I wish I were getting off in the mornings like the two of you, but apparently, even though he has a car, we can never find a place to make something happen,” Castiel griped.

Charlie and Jo froze when they reached the bottom step causing Castiel to slam into them as he also reached the bottom step.

Dean was standing at the bottom of the stairs with his arms crossed over his chest. “So, Cas… You got something you’d like to say to me?”

_ Of fucking course. _

 

>>>>>>

 

“I must admit Dean, I am sad to see you go,” Mick divulged as he gave Dean a hearty handshake.

Dean laughed. “I’m not disappearing off the face of the earth, Mick. My brother still goes to school here and…”

“So does your boyfriend,” Rufus interrupted.

_ What?! How does he know?! We’ve been so careful! _ “Excuse me?”

Rufus rolled his eyes. “Boy, I’m not blind or stupid.”

“You are fairly obvious, Dean, especially when you walked into work with an ill-concealed hickey on your neck,” Mick added.

Dean face flushed.  _ Note to self… Keep neck biting to a minimum in the future. _

“When did you two start dating?”

“Look, I can get into serious trouble for having anything to do with him, so I’m…”

“Dean,” Mick interjected, holding up a hand to silence him. “We’ve known about your blossoming relationship for a while now. Neither of us plans on saying anything. We should, but we’re not.”

“I was actually going to say something Tuesday morning last week when I saw the two of you walking into the school together,” Rufus mentioned. “But… Well, seeing that kid playing and singing again changed my mind. You’ve been good for him. From what I can tell, it’s mutual,” Rufus said with a smile.

Dean blushed. “Thanks.”

Mick clapped his hands together. “So, when did you get together?”

“Uh…Black Friday,” Dean answered.

“Shit,” Mick muttered.

Rufus gave Mick a sympathetic smack on the back. “Awww. It’s okay, Mickey. Just remember, I want the Blue Label, not the Black.”

“You’re going to get the Black, you wanker! I’m not spending five hundred dollars on a sodding bottle of bloody scotch!” Mick hissed.

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed. “Am I missing something?”

“Well, you see, Dean,” Rufus began with an enormous smile, “After school last Tuesday, I made a bet with this little Brit here that you two started dating after Thanksgiving.”

“Are you sure you didn’t start dating mid-November, Dean? There was such a change in you after the first week of November,” Mick pleaded.

Dean could feel his cheeks heat as he once again started to blush. “We weren’t dating, then. We were… We were spending a lot of time together as friends, but that’s all.”

Rufus chuckled. “I expect to see my bottle on my desk when we get back to school in January.”

Mick mumbled something unintelligible, then left the office.

“He’ll get over it,” Rufus beamed, thoroughly satisfied with his win.

Dean shook his head before he pointed an accusatory finger at Rufus. “The two of you have a gambling problem when it comes to me. This is the second time the two of have placed bets on my life. You realize that, right?”

“Eh, we gotta do something with our free time,” Rufus said with a shrug.

Dean scoffed with a shake of his head. “Okay, Chuckles. I’ll see ya later.” When he left the office, Mick was nowhere to be seen. He poked his head into the office once more and said, “Tell Mick I said goodbye, too.”

Rufus waved him off. “Get out of here.”

Dean smiled as he left the band room and turned left in the direction of the library.

As Dean made his way towards the library, he made a mental checklist of everything he still had to take care of before Cas’ birthday. Not only was he going to be doing some serious last-minute band rehearsals the next two days, he still had at least one present for Cas to worry about. The serious pain in the ass about Cas’ birthday was it was two days before Christmas. So, not only did he have to worry about a birthday present, but he had to also worry about a Christmas present.

Since Dean had nothing but final exams during the last week of his semester, he had plenty of time to swing by the Deer Park outlets on Monday to do some last minute shopping. He picked up presents for everyone, but he was having the hardest time finding something for Cas. Of course, he already purchased at least one gift for him, but it just didn’t feel like enough. It was a framed piece of film from “A Hard Day’s Night.” When he saw the film strip, he knew it would be perfect for at least one part of his gift.  _ He has a signed copy of “Abbey Road” on his wall. This will look awesome next to that. _

There were a few other items he came across which seemed perfect at the time until he really thought about it. Initially, he planned on buying a book of sonnets by Shakespeare. Cas mentioned in passing how much he loved Shakespeare while he was reading “Hamlet,” but he felt the book would be way too chick-flicky for their new relationship, so he put the book back.

When he was walking through Best Buy picking up World of Warcraft for Sam, because according to Charlie, “He’ll fucking love it! He said he was interested in playing,” he almost bought him a gift card for the Google Play Store because he was always talking about how he needed more music on his phone. Then, after much deliberation, he figured it would be a horrible gift to receive from a boyfriend.  _ Here, let me give you a gift card because I don’t know what else to get you. _

Once he was at the stairwell to the library, he started to climb the stairs. However, when he heard what Cas was talking about, he paused.

“I know I’m going to have fun. That’s not what’s going to be a pain in my ass. Scheduling with Dean and my mom is what’s going to kill me,” Castiel explained.

Dean walked back down the stairs and stood at the bottom.  _ Huh, I wonder where he plans on going with this. See how much of a villain he makes me out to be.  _ He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned up against the wall to listen in on their conversation.

“It won’t be too bad,” Jo responded. “I mean, yeah, it’s going to be a lot of work and probably a bit stressful, but the last two weeks have been about the same already, right?”

_ Thank you, Jo! _

“Yeah, it has been,” Castiel sighed. “But the musical rehearsals… That is going to be a brand new batch of hell.”

“You’re a worry wart and a Debby Downer. You know that, right?” Charlie asked.

_ Is it just me or are Jo and Charlie actually siding with Becky and me here? _

Dean could hear the three of them starting to approach the stairs.

Castiel huffed out a humorless laugh. “Hey, I just realized, Mark and I have one serious thing in common.”

“Yeah, and what’s that?” Charlie inquired.

“Our sex lives are basically nonexistent. Mark’s more so than mine, but you get the idea.”

Dean knew his face was probably somewhere between embarrassment, shock, and fury.  _ Where the fuck does he get off talking about this with…  _ He rolled his eyes internally at himself.  _ What made you think he wouldn’t talk about our lack of finishing anything ever with them? _

“What?! It’s true!” Cas asserted.

_ Pfft… Never said you were wrong. _

Jo scoffed. “Your sex life is definitely more active than some.”

“Excuse me?” Charlie growled.

_ Oh, shit… Maybe I shouldn’t be listening in on this. _

“Not us, hun. Did we or did we not just get off this morning in the…”

_ Oh, dear, God! I should not be listening to this! _

“I can’t hear you!” Cas said loudly enough to interrupt Jo’s reply.

“And don’t you forget it, gorgeous,” Charlie replied.

_ God, I wish I was getting off... _

“I wish I were getting off in the mornings like the two of you, but apparently, even though he has a car, we can never find a place to make something happen,” Castiel complained.

Dean’s eyes narrowed as he glared at Jo and Charlie.

The both of them swallowed hard with knowing expressions.

_ Yeah, that’s fucking right. I caught you. _

Cas ran into them due to their unexpected stop. There was no surprise in his expression. In fact, he didn’t even look sorry for what he had been sharing with the other two.

Dean gritted his teeth. “So, Cas… You got something you’d like to say to me?”

“Tell me I’m wrong, Dean,” Cas rebutted instantly.

“Well… Um… We’re gonna just head towards the cafe to wait for the after school buses,” Charlie stammered. “Later.”

“Bye,” Jo blurted.

Then, the two ladies scurried off.

Dean sighed in defeat. “I’m not going to tell you you're wrong. You and I both know you’re right, but do you seriously have to go and talk about it with them?”

Cas threw his hands up. “Who the fuck else am I going to talk to about this? And don’t even try to say 'you.'”

“But you can talk to me about this sort of shit, Cas! I’m your fucking boyfriend for Christ’s sake.” He whispered the final sentence.

“Every time we come close to something, if it’s not them, it’s you that stops us! I’m going out of my fucking mind! Do you have any…”

“Don’t you dare act like you’re the only one who’s frustrated as fuck, Cas!” Dean snarled. He exhaled out an exasperated breath. “Can we talk about this somewhere else that is not here?”

Without another word, Cas stomped off in the direction of the Impala.

_ Ugh… Blue balls are destroying us. _ Dean’s shoulders slumped as he bowed his head, then followed Cas to the car.

As soon as their doors were closed behind them, Cas turned towards Dean and stared daggers into him.”Well, we’re in a place that is not the school. You plan on…”

“Cas,” Dean interjected, “You are far from the only one who wants to take what we have to the next level. Or did you forget how fucking close I was to cumming the other night before Gabriel rudely interrupted us?” Dean asked, his voice growing louder as his anger started to take the driver’s seat of his emotions.

“I was close that night, too. Perhaps  **you** are the one who forgot how fucking horrible that night was for not only you but me, too!” Cas snapped. His head fell into his hands where he growled in agitation, then ran his fingers through his hair. “I can’t take it anymore. My hormones are going to kill me.”

Dean huffed out a single humorless laugh. “Yours are going to kill you? I’m fucking surprised my palms haven’t started growing fucking hair on them from the number of times I have masturbated the past few weeks.”

“My shower drain should be sealed shut with the amount of early morning masturbation sessions I’ve been having,” Cas grumbled.

This time, Dean actually did laugh. He threw his head back and gripped his stomach. “Fuck!” He continued to chuckle. “We’re fucking hopeless.”

Cas hit Dean with a bitch face. “I fail to see what is so funny about this. It is incredibly unhealthy how often I have been masturbating.”

Dean guffawed at Cas’ remark. “I had the same thought recently.”

A crooked smile spread across Cas face. “Well, at least we agree that it is unhealthy.”

“We’ll figure this out, Cas. I’ll figure this out. Again, you’re not the only one who is going out of their mind here,” Dean added.

Cas sighed. “Can we go home? I’m tired. The past two weeks have been exhausting. I just need to decompress.”

“Of course, Cas. I’ll drop you off, then I gotta head off to band practice,” Dean replied as he started the car.

“Oh, yeah… I forgot you had band practice tonight,” Cas said, his word drenched in disappointment. However, the smile which quickly spread across his face only moments later completely negated whatever sadness he must have been feeling. “I’m so excited about going to your show tomorrow. Jo told me how amazing your band is. Not that I doubted for a second your band would be anything short of magnificent, but she told me how blown away she was with your band the last time she saw you guys perform.”

Dean blushed. “I hope you can confirm her review when you see us tomorrow night.”

“I’m surprised how relaxed you are about the whole me going out to a public place situation,” Cas mentioned.

Dean breathed out a laugh. “Well, I know the bouncer, so that’s why. Ira would never let anyone in who would cause a scene. I already told him about Al and showed him a picture.”

Cas did his signature head tilt as his eyebrows furrowed. “What about Brady, Ramiel, and Azazel? They are just as likely to cause an issue as Al is.”

“I don’t have any of their pictures, Cas,” Dean explained. “If I did, I would have put them on the uninvited list.”

“Shit… I can ask Charlie to hack…”

Dean’s eyes widened in shock as he interrupted Cas. “What?! Hack?!”

“Um, yeah. Charlie is kind of a computer whiz. She hasn’t been in that world as of late because of what she tried to do for me back in eighth grade, but she can probably find a picture of them and forward them to you.”

“What did she try to do in eighth grade?”

Cas looked down at his knotted fingers. “She tried to find a paper trail or in this case an electronic fingerprint showing something that would prove Alastair was indeed there at the time. She got… Well, she almost got caught, so she tries to limit her activity in that department as much as she can.”

“Did she find something?” Dean asked, his curiosity peaked.

“The fact that she almost got caught kind of makes me think she almost did.”

Dean cleared his throat. “Cas? Why hasn’t she tried anything again lately? Technology could be your weapon when it comes to Al.”

Cas rolled his eyes. “Dean? Have you forgotten what happened on Black Friday? He has probably taken care of covering his tracks with everything.”

_ Touché. _

When they pulled into Cas’ driveway, Dean didn’t hesitate to grab Cas’ arm and drag him closer to him so he could plant a kiss on his luscious lips.

Cas hummed into the kiss as his right hand went into Dean’s hair to deepen the kiss.

_ Ugh, I’m about to prove him right. _ Dean broke the kiss, much to Cas’ annoyance. “I hate to do this, but I have so much to do before tomorrow. Can I take a rain check?”

Cas exhaled a deep breath. “Fine.”

“I really am sorry.”  _ You have no idea how sorry I am. _

“I know.” Cas placed one more kiss on Dean’s lips before he slid across the front seat to the passenger side door. “Ten o’clock tomorrow, right?” he asked before he exited the car.

“Yeah, but you’ll hear from me before then,” Dean replied.

Castiel smiled. “I look forward to it.”

As soon as Cas was in the house, Dean pulled out of the driveway, then made the short trip back home. The entire way home, he was lost in thought trying to figure out how he was going to solve their issue. Cas was right; he had a car. Every time they started doing anything in his Baby, they were always in front of Cas’ house. _Well, what if you weren’t?_ There were only so many places they could go to get off in a car. _You could go to Lake Ronkonkoma…_ _Talk about cliche, man._ He decided he’d figure out destination later. There was one thing, however, he did decide upon.

Once he was safely parked in his driveway, he took out his cell phone, then pulled up the group message he had with his band.

**Dean: Hate to do this to you guys, but would you mind making a last minute adjustment to our set list?**

**Pam: Ugh, come on, hotshot. We literally have thirty hours until the gig. You gotta make changes now?**

**Dean: It’s one of your favorites to play, Pamela. So, quit your bitchin.**

**Benny: Whatcha thinkin’, brotha?**

**Dean: I just want to trade out one Zeppelin song for another.**

**Garth: I’m in. See you guys in twenty?**

**Pam: Uh-huh.**

**Dean: Yup.**

**Benny: I’ll see ya in thirty. Pam, did you forget how big of a pain your drum set is?**

**Pam: Shut up!**

**Dean: Lmao.**

**Pam: Fine. See ya in thirty.**

  
_ Cas is gonna lose his shit, _ Dean thought with a smile.


	40. Chapter Forty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, this chapter is being posted so late. I've been running around all day doing final prep for Jaxcon! I'm so excited about going to my second convention. If any of you are going I'm going to be in Row O. I hope you enjoy the chapter!

“Hey, hun!” Becky shouted from the kitchen. “A package came for you in the mail. It's from Michael.”

Castiel took the steps two at a time to get to the package.  _ Are they finally here?!  _

The idea for Dean's Christmas present came to him around the same time Dean first started coming over. Dean nearly lost his mind when he saw Castiel’s record collection, especially when he saw which Led Zeppelin albums Castiel had. After spending plenty of time with Dean, Castiel discovered Dean’s favorite Led Zeppelin songs were on  _ Coda  _ and  _ Zeppelin II _ . With Sam's help, Castiel discovered Dean only owned  _ In Through The Out Door  _ on vinyl. So, Castiel went to work on finding every other record Led Zeppelin had ever released.

Contrary to what he had initially thought, it was not easy finding every single studio album on vinyl. It was also not easy to find a spare moment to look without Dean being there. The records were either hundreds of dollars, in horrible condition, or not what he was looking for. So, even though he didn’t want to do it, he made a call.

It was a good thing Castiel’s family was in the music industry because album finding became insanely easy from there on out. His cousin, Michael, was a huge Led Zeppelin fan and randomly enough had quadruplets of basically every single album, including their live albums. Castiel thought he was crazy for doing it, but Michael sent him every record he needed for one hundred dollars. Knowing Michael, the records were probably as mint as they could get and he was sending them to him, free shipping, for one hundred dollars. Even more shocking was he was doing it knowing it was not for Castiel.  _ I love my family sometimes. _

When Castiel opened the box, sure enough, they were all original releases and close to perfect. When he looked at  _ Coda,  _ he almost had a heart attack.   _ There is no way he meant to send this copy. _

Castiel put in his cousin’s number, then waited for him to pick up.

“ _ Hello, Castiel. I’m assuming you received the package,  _ ” Michael greeted , s traight to business, as per usual.

“Yes, I did. Thank you very much. You have been an enormous help.”

“You’re welcome. Anytime,” Michael replied, a smile in his voice.

Castiel cleared his throat. “I do have one question, Michael.”

“ _ And what’s that?  _ ”

“Did you mean to send your autographed copy of  _ Coda  _ ?”

A laugh came through the phone. “ _ Yes, Castiel, I did. I have two signed copies of  _ **_Coda_ ** .”

His jaw dropped. “Are you fucking serious, Michael?!”

“Language, Castiel!” Becky snapped. “You’re sister can hear you!”

His cousin's laughter continued to sound through the phone. “ _ What I was not going to send you was one of my duplicate autographed copies of  _ **_Houses of the Holy_ ** _ which includes John Bonham’s signature. Those albums are gifts reserved for family,  _ ” Michael responded. The grin still evident in his voice.

Castiel chuckled. “So, you would send me a copy?”

“ _ I don’t know, cousin. Those kinds of gifts are saved for extraordinary occasions. Like when you graduate from college type of occasion,  _ ” Michael answered. “ _ The topic is somewhat moot, isn’t it? Aren’t you more of a Beatles fan?  _ ”

He nodded even though Michael couldn’t see him. “I am, but I have been listening to Led Zeppelin quite often since I met Dean.”

“ _ Well, then I suppose you are about to give him the perfect gift, aren’t you?  _ ” Michael asked with an obvious smirk.

Castiel smiled. “I most certainly am.”

“ _ Again, you’re welcome, cousin. I have to get back to work. Talk soon?  _ ”

“Of course, Michael. Have a good night.”

“ _ You, too,  _ ” Michael said, then disconnected the line.

Castiel brought up his recent messages and messaged Charlie.

**Castiel: So… What do you think Dean is going to do when he gets an autographed copy of** **_Coda_ ** **for Christmas?**

Surprisingly enough, it didn’t take long for Castiel to receive a text from her.

**Charlie: Well, if he wasn’t crazy about you before, then that will undoubtedly solidify his psychosis over you.**

The grin Castiel had been wearing widened.

**Castiel: I guess I have just won boyfriend of the year.**

**Charlie: Pretty fucking much. Lol**

_ That’s what I thought. _

The next day, Castiel woke up with a smile on his face. One of the things Castiel loved about his birthday was it was usually during winter break, so he never had to worry about waking up early for school. No alarm; no knocking on his door telling him it’s time to get the day started. All he had to do was relax and enjoy his day

When he got upstairs, his entire family was already up and waiting for him. It wasn’t late , o nly around 10:30, but he knew they had probably been sitting there for a while.

His mom was the first one to greet him. She hugged him, then a kiss on the cheek. After she let him go, she promised him breakfast would be ready in twenty minutes. Hannah squeezed him in a bear hug as soon as he sat down on the couch, then swore he could choose any movie he wanted. Of course, even though he hated admitting it, he chose  _ Moana _ because he loved watching it with her. Gabriel and his dad gave him quick hugs and promised presents after breakfast.

Breakfast was delicious. Becky made his favorite, blueberry pancakes, bacon, sausage, and scrambled eggs. Castiel received his presents at the table as soon as he finished.

“I go first!” Hannah announced.

Castiel chuckled.  _ Of course.  _ “Alright, I’m ready when you are.”

Hannah nearly shoved the bag at him in excitement. “Here you go, Castiel!”

He took the card out first. Birthday cards are pretty standard, but it was only polite to read them first.

“I signed it all by myself! No help from mommy or daddy!” Hannah exclaimed.

The sloppy lettering was proof enough.  _ She's so adorable.  _ “I see. You did an excellent job, Hannah. Thank you.”

She beamed. “You’re welcome.” She started to bounce next to him, then held his arm with a death grip. “Open the present!!!!”

He removed the tissue paper and found a book of piano sheet music for the movie _Moana_. He laughed — _only_ _this kid._ “Thank you, Hannah. I love it.”

Hannah’s smile brightened infinitesimally. “Really?”

“Really.”

“My turn, little bro,” Gabriel said as he handed another bag to Castiel.

Just as before, Castiel read the card first. Gabriel’s were usually wildly inappropriate. This year was no better. The card had a picture of a scantily clad male model on the outside of it. Castiel quickly put the card back into the envelope before Hannah could see, then blushed.  _ Asshole.  _ This bag contained a couple of band t-shirts and more piano sheet music — this time for  _ RENT.  _ “Thank you, Gabriel. Preparing me for playing Mark?” he asked with a grin.

Gabriel shrugged. “You know me.”

Castiel shook his head.

“Our turn,” Chuck stated, then handed a card over to Castiel.

His eyebrows furrowed.  _ This is unlike them.  _ The card was sentimental and inspiring to the point of overly sweet. However, what brought a tear to his eyes wasn’t the card, it was the gift receipt they put into the card.

“You bought me a new piano?”

Tears were filling the brims of Becky’s eyes. “Do you like it?”

_ The sheet music makes sense now.  _ “I love it!” A wet laugh left him as happy tears started to fall in earnest. “More than love it! You got me a Schiller?”

His father was giving him a smile that transcended any Castiel had ever seen. “I know you love your keyboard, but I felt it was about time you had a grown-up piano.”

Castiel internally rolled his eyes. “Schiller’s aren’t cheap! You guys didn’t have to do this.”

“It wasn’t cheap,” Becky admitted. “But we’re so proud of how far you’ve come, sweetie. You deserve it.”

“However, the piano is not just a birthday present. It is also your Christmas present,” Chuck explained.

Castiel shook his head. “Are you kidding me?! This gift should be my gift for the next two Christmases and birthdays. It’s way too much! I can never thank you enough or repay…”

“Will you shut up and just give me a hug!” Becky snapped, an affectionate smile on her face.

Castiel wrapped his arms around Becky, then squeezed her tight. “I love you, mom.”

“I love you, too, sweetheart.”

Once he released his mom, Castiel gave his dad a quick hug. “I love you, dad.”

Chuck gave Castiel’s shoulder tender squeeze as they parted. “Love you, too, kid.”

After Castiel shed a few more happy tears, he opened the card he received from his Aunt Amara. Of course, as usual, she sent him a shit ton of money.  _ She’s too friggin much!  _ He looked at the clock.  _ It’s around five there right now… She should be free. _

Unfortunately, when she answered, it was only a quick call because she was working. Michael was there, so they were able to kill two birds with one stone. Michael was able to wish Castiel a happy birthday, and Castiel would thank him for the separate card he had sent filled with money.

Balthazar called right after he hung up with them.

“ _ Happy Birthday, Cassie!  _ ”

“Thank you, Zar.”

“ _ How are you, dear cousin? How’s Dean?  _ ”

Castiel could hear the eyebrow wiggle through the phone. He rolled his eyes. “We’re both fine, Zar. How’re you?”

“ _ Busy as all hell! You know how hectic this time of year is. It’s nothing but dinner parties and kissing some serious arses. I swear if my grandmother tries to get me to eat one more bloody biscuit _ _ , _ _ I’m going to scream!  _ ”

Castiel laughed. “Grandma Schneider is force feeding you again?”

“ _ I long for holidays with you lot when I have to deal with this nonsense! I know my father would be displeased if he knew how I feel about her, but unfortunately, yet fortunately, he is not here to see it.  _ ” The pain of Balthazar's father’s absence was evident in his cousin’s voice.

This time of year did not hold the happiest of memories for his family, especially for his cousins and Aunt Amara. His aunt and uncle moved to England the week after Thanksgiving in 2004. The reason for the permanent move across the pond was his Uncle Mike wanted to be closer to his family, as well as they were already spending an enormous amount of time in England. It had only made sense to live there instead of New York City. Of course, they decided to keep their penthouse in the city for extended stays due to business, but their permanent residence would be in London. By the new year, Uncle Mike was dead. No one knew he had a brain aneurysm. During one of the holiday parties his aunt and uncle threw for the label, it ruptured causing a hemorrhagic stroke. His uncle was dead on arrival. Balthazar was only eight.

Castiel took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Zar. I wish I could be there with you right now.”

“ _ No, you truly don’t. Trust me. I wish I were there with you right now! What are you doing for your birthday?  _ ”

The smile that spread across Castiel’s face was unavoidable. “Dean’s band is performing tonight. Pretty sure I told you about it, but that’s what I will be doing.”

“ _ Ooooh! Going to watch the boy sing his heart out for you, yeah?!  _ ” Balthazar jested.

Even though he knew his cousin was poking fun at him, he couldn’t help but blush at the idea that Dean might have chosen a song for him. “He’s performing for more than just me, Zar.”

“ _ Of course. Still, considering what I witnessed when I met him, I’m sure he has something special planned. The boy is hopelessly in love with you.  _ ”

All of the color drained from Castiel’s face as he swallowed hard. “No, he’s not.”

“ _ If you say so. Listen, Cassie, I have to cut our call short, but I’ll talk to you on Monday?  _ ”

“Yes.”

“ _ Perfect. Love you, cousin!  _ ”

“You, too, Zar.”

His cousin’s laughter was the last thing Castiel heard when he ended the call.  _ He’s instigating shit again. _

Before he had a chance to put his phone down, it started buzzing. “Grand Central. Castiel speaking. Which track schedule is your call in reference to?”

A familiar chuckle filled the other end. “ _Happy Birthday, angel!_ _Busy morning, huh?_ ”

“Pfft,” he said waving Dean’s question off. “What would make you think that?” he asked, his question drenched in sarcasm.

“ _ So, not only busy but also strenuous. Gotcha.”  _ Dean’s bright smile was coming through the phone.

Castiel huffed out a small laugh. “God, I miss you.”

“ _ Miss you, too. Only…  _ ” Dean paused. “  _ A little over nine hours until you see me. I’d give you minutes and seconds too, but I don’t want to be that kind of boyfriend.” _

“ _ Ugh! Fucking gross, Chachi! Say goodbye to Joanie. We got some last minute shit to go over, hotshot!  _ ”

Castiel grinned. “Pam, I presume?”

“ _ Yeah, everyone is really excited to meet you later. I really should get back to practice, but I needed to call you.  _ ”

“ _ He’s been whining about how much he misses you since last night! _ ”  s omeone hollered in the background.

“ _ Oh, my God, Garth! Shut the fuck up! _ ” Dean hissed.

“ _ You’re only upset, brotha, ‘cause he speaks the truth,”  _ another voice said.

“ _ I fucking hate all three of you. _ ”

Castiel snickered. “I like them.”

“ _ Don’t you start, too, mister. _ ”

Castiel’s smile threatened to split his face. “Am I going to get to talk to you before you get on stage?”

“ _ Probably. Depends on when you get there. _ ”

“Well, you said ten. So, does that mean you are performing at ten? Or does that mean you want me there at ten.”

“ _ We’re set to start at ten.  _ ”

“Then, I will be there before ten.”

“ _ Awesome.  _ ”

“Have fun practicing.”

“Later, angel.”

“Goodbye, Dean.”

A bunch of smooching sounds was coming from his phone as he disconnected.  _ Tonight is going to be amazing! _

>>>>>>

“All of you fucking suck ass!” Dean barked as he locked his phone.

“Awww, come on, Dean,” Garth chuckled. “You seriously have been doing nothing for the past twenty-four hours but gush over how amazing this guy is and how you miss him.”

“Not like that’s anything new,” Pam muttered.

Dean rubbed his forehead. “Look, I really like him. So, please,  **please** , do not do that again.”

Benny guffawed. “Brotha, you just solidified that we will most definitely be doing that again.”

“Ugh,” Dean groaned as he threw his hands up in defeat. “Whatever. We got a few more hours of practice, then we all gotta get ready. So, let’s kick this shit in the ass so we can rock the house tonight. Alright?”

After a few more hours of practice, they packed everything up, then parted ways. The plan was to meet up later at Macleod’s at around nine to get everything set up. They had performed at the venue a few times, so set up wasn’t going to be too hard. The thing he loved about the bar was how close it was to home. When he says close, he literally means less than a mile and a half up the road from his house.  _ Not like it’s going to make a difference. We’re still going to the diner after. _

Once Dean said goodbye to his bandmates, he went into the house to quickly shove some food into his face. He took out some rolls and cold cuts and got to work making himself a killer sandwich. Unfortunately, he was going to have to forego the cheese until after he was done singing, but the amount of meat on the sandwich would help make up for the lack of cheese.  _ Don’t want phlegm while I’m singing. _

Sam was already in the kitchen studying. “Can you make me one, too, please?”

“Dude, midterms aren’t until after winter break. Why are you studying now?” Dean asked as he took two rolls out of the bag and put the rest away.

Sam rolled his eyes. “I like to be prepared for everything, Dean.”

“Whatever, nerd.”

Sam shook his head. “What Cas sees in you, I will never know.”

Dean’s eyebrows shot up to the ceiling. “You callin’ him Cas, too, now?”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know. He told me no one calls him Cas. His cousin, Balthazar, calls him Cassie.” Dean cringed. “Gabriel calls him, little bro, little shit, and once I heard him call Cas Cassie. That didn’t end well for Gabriel. Apparently, only ‘Zar’ can call him that.”

“Kinda like how you’re the only one who can call me Samsquatch.”

“Yup.”

“Are you sure it’s okay that I tag along tonight?” Sam questioned nervously.

Dean’s face screwed up in confusion. “Dude, seriously? Why would it be a problem?”

“I’m fifteen, Dean,” Sam deadpanned.

“And? What about it?!”

“It’s illegal.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “I already okayed it with Rowena and Ira, so stop your worrying!”

“I just don’t want anyone to get in trouble,” Sam explained.

“Well, unless you plan on boozing it up, we should be copasetic.” 

Sam’s eyes widened with shock as Dean placed the sandwich in front of him.

“What?”

“Copasetic?” Sam asked.

He narrowed his eyes at his smartass of a little brother. “That’s right. I know words, too.”

Sam shook his head, then took a bite out of the massive sandwich Dean made him.

“A thank you would be nice,” Dean grumbled as he took the seat next to Sam.

Sam placed a hand on Dean’s shoulder. “Thank you,” he replied as continued to chew. As soon as he swallowed his bite, Sam smiled. “Never said you were stupid, Dean. You’re just full of surprises.”

Dean rolled his eyes for what felt like the millionth time that day. “Alright. Finish your sandwich, bitch.”

“Jerk,” Sam said with a huge grin.

Once Dean was done cramming the food down his throat , he threw his paper plate away, then went down the hall to take a shower.

As the stream of hot water pounded onto Dean’s skin, he thought out exactly what he had planned for the night. Of course, there was the set-up, then the performance, but there were also plans set for after the show. The band always went to a diner as soon as they were done packing up. It was a tradition. He was looking forward to their old tradition. It had been months since he had a chance to do that with his band. He was looking forward to burgers, shakes, and pie with his friends, as well as he was looking forward to sharing all of that with Cas.

Speaking of Cas, he wasn’t sure how much of a birthday gift it was, but he finally figured out where they could make shit work. Dean felt like an idiot when he finally figured it out. For weeks, he had been masturbating in the garage. Why he had never thought of bringing Cas, there was beyond him. If he were being honest with himself, he didn’t understand why he still hasn’t invited Cas over.  _ Probably because of Becky. _

The very thought of seeing Cas laid out on the backseat of his Impala was driving him nuts. He had promised himself he would save his orgasm for Cas, but his very insistent erection was making it hard. No pun intended. As soon as he felt clean enough, he turned the knob to sub-zero temperatures, then let the frigid water do its work.  _ Less than eight hours, you can wait! _

 

>>>>>>

 

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BESTIE!!!!” Charlie hollered as she entered Castiel’s house.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “I’m five feet away from you, Charlie. Is it vital for you to scream?”

“Yes,” she deadpanned, then threw her arms around him, squeezing him tight.

“Stop hogging him, Charlie. It’s my turn to wish him a happy birthday!” Jo asserted as she weaved her arms in between Charlie and Castiel, then hugged him just as tightly.

“Your zeal is appreciated, but I do enjoy having full use of my lungs,” Castiel strained to say.

Both Jo and Charlie released him instantly. “Sorry,” they apologized in unison.

Castiel took a deep breath and smiled. “It’s okay. Again, I appreciate the enthusiasm, but I do rather enjoy having control of all of my faculties. Lack of oxygen certainly inhibits that.”

Charlie shook her head. “Come on, ya weirdo. You got presents to open from Jo and me.”

Jo put both of her hands on Castiel’s shoulders steering him towards the downstairs.

When they got into Castiel’s room, Charlie dropped her bag at the foot of his bed and took out two cards, then handed them to Castiel.

It was far from a surprise what he got from the both of them. He always asked for the same thing every birthday, gift cards. Castiel preferred to chose his own gifts rather than making everyone stress out about what to get him. Gift cards were easy. Plus, Christmas was two days from his birthday, so he always felt like everyone had enough to stress over without having to worry about two unique presents for him.

“Thank you. Both of you,” he said with a smile. “I appreciate it.”

“No problem, bestie. We love you!” Charlie beamed as she threw her arms around him once again.

Jo did the same, then as soon as they separated she asked, “What are you wearing tonight?”

Castiel eyebrows furrowed. “Um… I was planning on wearing this,” he replied as he looked down at himself. He was wearing his usual jeans and a band t-shirt.

Charlie’s nose scrunched up in disgust. “Seriously?”

“What?”

“You’re not going to a bar wearing that. I’m not going to let you,” Jo announced as she walked over to Castiel’s closet and flung the door open.

“The two of you aren’t dressed up!” Castiel griped.

Charlie smirked. “There is more in this bag than just two cards, Castiel.”

“How do you feel about grey jeans?” Jo asked from the depths of Castiel’s closet.

Charlie huffed out a sigh. “No. Those are too tight in the legs and a little saggy in the ass.”

Castiel’s jaw dropped.  _ Are they fucking serious? _

Charlie walked over to the closet. “These jeans look good on him.”

“What about this?” Jo inquired.

“Oh, I like it!” Charlie gushed. “With this, too, right?”

“Oh, my God! Yes!” Jo agreed.

Castiel rubbed his forehead. “What are you two going to make me wear?”

Charlie poked her head out. “You’ll see.”

After another minute went by, Jo came out of the closet with a pair of dark blue jeans, a plain white v-neck t-shirt, and a black leather belt.

Charlie followed with his pair of laceless black leather chukka boots and his black leather bomber jacket. She threw them on the bed. “You’re wearing this,” she directed with a wide grin.

Castiel cocked an eyebrow at the clothing now strewn out on his bed. “It’s in the forties right now. You seriously expect me to wear just a t-shirt and a leather jacket.”

Jo went back into his closet, then came out with a cerulean scarf. “This should work.”

He looked over the items, then looked back at the two ladies in the room. “I don’t know. Are you sure this will look good?”

“Positive,” they said in unison.

“Now, hurry up and get dressed.” Charlie picked up the jeans and t-shirt from the bed, then handed them to Castiel. “All of us have to be ready in forty minutes, and I still have to fuck around with your hair.”

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he looked up and grabbed a few strands of hair. “What’s wrong with my hair?”

“You’re like the worst gay man ever,” Charlie stated.

Castiel narrowed his eyes at her. “I’m sorry that not everyone fits your stereotype of what is a ‘gay man ,’ ” Castiel grumbled.

Charlie huffed out an aggravated breath. “Would you just go get showered and dressed, Castiel!” she ordered, pointing in the direction of the bathroom.

“Geez, so bossy .  I’m going,” Castiel mumbled as he stomped off towards the bathroom like an errant child.

>>>>>>

“Thanks, Ira. I really can’t thank you enough,” Dean said as he patted the massive man on the back.

He nodded his head once. “I don’t want issues,” Ira replied with his unusually deep voice.

“Well,” Dean began, “keep all of those assholes out of here tonight, and you won’t have any.”

“Mm-hmm.” Ira put the photo Charlie acquired for Dean onto his clipboard, then headed towards the bar door to start letting people in.

“Hello, boy,” Rowena crooned from behind the bar. “Do you want me to get you the usual or are we pretending to be a good boy tonight?” she asked with a smirk.

“Yes, I will take a shot of whiskey,” Dean beamed at the little Scottish redhead. “But not until right before I get on stage. I won’t need liquid courage until then.”

Rowena half smiled as she pursed her lips at him and gave him a thumbs up.

Dean hopped up onto the stage and started arranging the amps in the bands desired positions.

“Did you see who’s following us?” Benny asked.

Dean looked up at him and shook his head. “No.”

“The Forgotten Son,” Benny responded, showing Dean the lineup.

Dean groaned. “Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

Dean hopped off of the stage, then made a beeline toward Rowena. “Come on, Ro! You seriously booked Adam’s band tonight?”

“Who?” Rowena questioned, feigning innocence.

“Don’t play dumb, sweetheart. We both know you’re not.”

“Oh, Adam! That wee-sausage? He offered me money, dear boy. I couldn’t very well say no,” she explained, batting her eyelashes.

Dean smirked, then threw his head back with a laugh. “He paid you?”

“Of course, he did, dear. You bring the customers, my boy. He makes them leave. He’s paying me for the money I will surely be losing.”

Dean leaned over the bar, then planted a kiss on her cheek. “You’re something else, Ro.”

Rowena poured out a shot for each of them. After she knocked back her shot, she smiled at him. “As you so clearly stated, Dean. I’m not an imbecile. I take what I want and don’t ask for permission.” She pushed the other shot she poured to Dean. “Now, take your shot and finish setting up so I can watch your sexy tush prance around the stage.”

Dean happily guzzled back his shot. “Thanks, Ro.”

She waved him off, then turned back towards her duties as owner and bartender.

_ Powerful badass chick,  _ Dean mused, then went back to organizing the stage.

“Hey, Benny? Did you get any extra picks? I think I lost mine.” Garth was searching his pockets trying to find the pick he knew wasn’t there.

“In my case. You’re gonna have to start remembering stuff at some point.” Benny was shaking his head while getting his saxophone ready.

“Hey, Dean!”

Dean glanced over his shoulder at his brother. “Yeah? What’s up?” he asked before going back to setting up the amps. A crowd was already starting to develop, and he wanted to make sure everything was set-up before Cas got there.

“Just got a text from Charlie. They’re on their way,” Sam replied.

The shot helped, but it didn’t stop his heart from dropping into the pit of his stomach as he started to worry about what Cas would think of his band.  _ What if he hates us? What if he thinks were horrible? _

“You nervous?” Sam asked a knowing smile.

“No,” Dean lied. 

Pam walked up behind Sam, then grabbed his ass. “Hey, grumpy! Leave the poor guy alone.”

“Pam, you gotta stop doing that!” Sam groaned as he massaged the cheek she grabbed.

“I’m sorry. Can’t help myself, sweetie. You could bounce quarters off that thang,” she responded with a wink.

“Pam, two words. Jail and bait.” Garth put his hand on Pam’s shoulder, then steered her towards her drums.

“He knows I have absolutely no interest in him like that,” Pam argued taking her seat at the drums.

As soon as he was done setting up the stage, Dean’s eyes never strayed too far from the bar’s entrance. He didn’t want to miss seeing his birthday boy walk in.  _ What if I fuck up? What if tonight goes to shit? There is way too much that can go wrong tonight. _

“Dean, take a deep breath! You’re giving me agita.” Pam whined as she threw a crumpled up flyer at him.

Just when Dean was about to throw it right back at her, he saw Castiel come in. His jaw dropped. _Holy shit…_ _fuck! Are we done performing yet?!_

If Cas planned to put Dean in an early grave, he was going to succeed. Every inch of Castiel exuded sex. From the way, his jeans hugged his ass, to the way his hair looked like he spent the entire day getting fucked into his mattress.  _ I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it through the whole line up without jumping him. _

When their eyes met from across the bar, Dean’s skin was set ablaze. “Wow,” he breathed.

The coy smile Dean received in response as Castiel headed towards the coat check drove him wild.  _ Yeah, not gonna make it,  _ Dean thought as he jumped off the stage and nearly sprinted towards his boyfriend.

 

>>>>>>

 

After Charlie spent fifteen minutes messing around with Castiel’s hair, they finally climbed into Becky’s car to make their way to the bar five minutes late. The entire ride there,  Castiel was shivering with anticipation, or maybe it was just the New York weather. Either way, he was about to jump out of his skin.

Charlie leaned into the front of the car. “You okay, bestie?”

“I’m just extremely excited about tonight. It’s been a while since I’ve been out of the house for something other than doctor’s appointments or school. Plus, I’ve never seen Dean’s band perform. There is just a lot to look forward to tonight,” Castiel explained with a huge smile on his face.

“A lot to look forward to, huh?” Becky asked as she gripped the steering wheel a little too tight.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Get your mind out of the gutter, mom.”

Becky shrugged. “You haven’t been listening to you two for the past month. I have.”

“Mom!” Castiel whined.

“Dean is driving you home, right?” Becky asked, ignoring his complaining.

“Yeah,” Jo answered for him. “We’re going to the diner later, so he’ll probably be back late.”

Becky nodded in understanding. “Well, one of you just make sure you text me to keep me posted, okay?”

“Of course,” they responded in unison.

When they pulled in front of Rowena’s, Castiel kissed his mom on the cheek. “Goodnight, mom.”

“Make good choices, sweetie,” Becky whispered, then hugged him. “And be careful.”

Castiel shook his head in exasperation. “I know, mom. I will. Love you.”

“Love you, too,” she responded, then kissed him on the cheek.

Castiel climbed out of the car, then shut the door behind him. All three of them waved goodbye as she drove off.

“You ready?” Jo asked rubbing her arms to keep herself warm.

Charlie wrapped an arm around Jo’s shoulder, then kissed her on the cheek. “Duh!”

Jo turned to look at Charlie. She gave her a lingering kiss. “Come on, gorgeous. We got a show to see.”

As they approached the bar doors, they were greeted by an enormous man. “ID?” he asked with a deep rough voice.

“We’re on the list,” Castiel answered. “Charlie Bradbury, Joanna Harvelle, and Castiel Shurley.”

The man looked down at his clipboard. There was no way this man didn’t suffer from gigantism. His hands were the size of dinner plates, and he had broad shoulders like a linebacker.  _ Buying suits for this man must be impossible. What is he a hundred XXXL with a sixty waist? _

“You can go in,” the giant muttered.

By this point, Castiel was shrinking into himself. The bouncer was quite intimidating. “Thank you,” Castiel uttered, then entered the bar with Jo and Charlie in tow.

“Holy shit!!” Charlie exclaimed. “The size of that man!!! He was terrifying!!!”

“I know,  **right** ?!?!?! The man was ginormous!!!” Jo agreed.

Charlie nodded her head. “Fucking freaky ass shit!”

The first person Castiel saw was Sam. He was speaking to a man wearing a Greek fisherman’s hat and suspenders. When Castiel’s eyes finally fell upon the object of his desire, his heart nearly stopped. His mouth was suddenly dry as his breath got caught in his throat.  _ God! He looks like he wants to devour me whole _ .  _ I guess the girls did a good job. _

Dean clearly mouthed the word “wow,” from where he was standing on the stage.

Castiel could feel his face flush as he smiled timidly at the ground.  _ Yup… Definitely did a good job. _

“We should probably check our coats,” Jo mentioned.

Castiel followed Jo and Charlie to the coat check, then started to take off his scarf.

“Do want me to help you jacket off?” Dean asked with a whisper as he wrapped his arms around Castiel’s waist from behind him.

The feeling of Dean’s warm breath on his neck made Castiel shiver. When a soft kiss was placed on the crook of his neck, Castiel closed his eyes, then licked his lips. The only response Castiel could get out was, “Hmm?”

Dean smiled against Castiel’s neck as he placed an open mouth kiss on his pulse point. “Do you want me to help you take your jacket off?” Dean asked, his voice somewhat muffled.

“You can help me take anything off,” Castiel replied as he turned around to give Dean a proper kiss.

“I plan to,” Dean promised before his lips met Castiel’s.

The way Dean was kissing, Castiel could tell he was trying to keep the kiss semi-tamed.  _ Fuck that! It’s my birthday!  _ Castiel grabbed the nape of Dean’s neck to deepen the kiss.

Dean instantly submitted to Castiel’s whim. However, within moments, Dean broke the kiss. His forehead rested against Castiel’s as he tried to catch his breath. “If I let you kiss me like that, I’ll never get on stage. And I have to be up there in,” he looked down at his watch, “now,” he chuckled. “You guys ran a little late.”

“Blame Charlie and my hair,” he informed as he pointed at his mess of dark brown hair.

“Actually, I should probably be thanking her because you just look… fuck!” Dean exclaimed as he continued to soak in Castiel’s appearance.

Castiel blushed underneath Dean’s scrutinizing gaze. “I’ll take that as a compliment,” he said as he looked down at his knotted fingers.

Dean grabbed both sides of Castiel’s face, forcing their eyes to meet. “Take it as more than one,” Dean breathed before he leaned into steal one more kiss.

“Hey, hotshot! We have a set to perform! You can kiss him later!” Pam hollered from her drum set.

“Fuck!” He pulled away, lips red and swollen from kissing Castiel. “Hold that thought.”

Castiel tried to catch his breath as Dean gave him one final once over.

“Fuck!” Dean groaned, then forcefully threw his body towards the stage.

“That was both disgusting and hilarious,” Charlie laughed.

“Looks like we did our job,” Jo agreed as she buffed her nails on her shoulder and blew them off.

Castiel rocked unsteadily on his feet as he continued to try to catch his breath from Dean’s mind-blowing kiss. “That was… Wow!”

>>>>>>

“You two are both adorable and disgusting,” Garth joked as he plugged his guitar in for the first song in their set.

Dean narrowed his eyes at him. “Shut up!”

Garth shook his head as he chuckled.

When the stage lights came on, Dean stood behind the mic. “How’s everybody doin’ tonight?”

The crowd's booming cheers brought an enormous smile to Dean’s face.

“Did you miss us?”

The thundering roar of the crowd was answer enough.

“We missed you, too.”

The bar was at max occupancy from what he could tell. Unfortunately, even though Rowena told him she had Adam’s pay to perform, he knew at least some of the crowd was there for The Forgotten Son and not just for them.  _ We’re still a million times better than them. _

Regardless of how long Dean had been gracing the stage with his presence, pre-performance jitters were unavoidable. Even so, as soon as the opening notes to “Lonely is the Night” by Billy Squier came from Garth’s guitar, he felt like he was home again.

Each song in their set was chosen by each member of the band. Garth was the one who decided they should play “Lonely is the Night.” His reasoning as always was, “I never get to sing, Dean! I gotta bare my soul every so often, too, ya know.” Garth, of course, was right. Dean was always happy to harmonize with his old friend. Dean would always roll his eyes at Garth when he said shit like that, but the truth of the matter was he enjoyed sharing a mic with Garth. Plus, Garth looked pretty badass as he overacted every riff of the song on his guitar.

“Turn the Page” by Bob Seger was a joint decision made by Dean and Benny mainly because Benny was a damn good sax player. Since the first moment he heard Benny play, he knew this guy would make it in the music business. Whether it was with Dean or without him, Benny’s talent would never be wasted.

The second to last song on their set was a Pam favorite. Ram Jam’s version of “Black Betty” was her chance to shine, and she never did disappoint. Pam would pull out every trick in the book. She’d spin her drumsticks like they were helicopter propellers in her hand, then toss them in the air before throwing herself into the beat of her drums. Dean always worried about putting “Black Betty” before a Led Zeppelin song, but he knew Pam could hold her own, so he would always let it slide.  _ Not saying she’s John Bonham, but she’s probably pretty fucking close. She’d probably give Neil Peart a run for his money. _

The last song of their set was the last minute switch he had made for Cas. Initially, Dean planned on doing “The Song Remains The Same,” but he had another idea in mind as soon as he dropped Cas off the previous day. Dean wanted to make Cas, for lack of a better term, jizz his pants. There was only one song his band performed which caused many a person throw their panties, themselves, and/or you name it, at them.

As soon as Garth started to play the opening notes of “Whole Lotta of Love” by Led Zeppelin, the crowd went wild.  _ Saw that coming.  _ Dean smirked as he rolled his hips to the riffs coming from Garth’s guitar. By the time Benny joined in with the bass, Dean was damn near gyrating his hips with his right foot on Benny’s amp. There was a specific point he was to make sure was loud and clear

For time reasons, they did a shortened version of the song. At least a minute in total was cut out of it, but it didn’t seem to bother anyone. The ladies in the crowd continued to lose their minds as he sang every note with as much passion as Robert Plant.  _ Sorry, ladies, I'm taken. This one is not for you.  _ Sadly, Dean couldn’t see Cas in the crowd, but he knew his performance, as well as the lyrics of the song, would make what he wanted clear. He smiled to himself as he sang the last few lyrics of the song.  _ I look forward to making you squirm, angel. _

 

>>>>>>

 

Castiel was thoroughly enjoying Raised from Perdition. Just as Jo promised, they were all incredible musicians _.  _ There was no doubt that all of them had a passion for what they were playing.

Every song in their set had its own appeal. It quickly became apparent the reason why was because each member chose their own song. The first song was clearly cherished by the lead guitarist, Garth. The way he felt every note made his love of the song quite visible.  _ It takes a lot of talent to be able to play an instrument and sing at the same time. Dean and Garth do it seamlessly. _

Of course, Jo was one hundred percent correct about Benny’s talent with a saxophone. The crowd went silent as soon as the first few notes exited the instrument. Castiel could understand why Dean would stop to talk to someone with such talent.  _ I could only imagine I would have done the same. _

When Pam started to rock out to “Black Betty,” Castiel could tell Dean’s words about her on the bus to Hofstra two months ago were true. The girl obviously knew she was hot and flaunted it.

“Ouch,” Charlie shouted as Jo smacked her. “What the hell was that for?”

Castiel turned to make sure his best friend was okay.

Jo’s eyes were narrowed at her girlfriend. “Don’t think I didn’t see the way you’re looking at Pam! She’s off limits, and you are very taken. Or have you forgotten?”

Charlie rolled her eyes. “Jo, don’t be jealous. There is only one woman in my life I want, and it’s you. So, knock it off. She’s just good at what she does. That’s all.”

Jo’s glare only became more heated with Charlie’s answer. “Uh-huh.”

_ Oh, boy… Not good. _

When the opening notes to the next began to sound through the speakers, Castiel faced the stage. The crowd went wild, so it was obvious it was a favorite of theirs. Since “A Whole Lotta Love” was a Led Zeppelin song, Castiel was pretty sure it was one of Dean’s , as well.

A salacious smile spread across Dean’s face as his hips started to roll in a delicious way. When Benny joined in, Castiel nearly exploded with the close to pornographic way Dean thrust his hips.

“You need cooling. Baby, I'm not fooling. I'm gonna send ya, back to schooling. A-way down inside. A-honey, you need it. I'm gonna give you my love. I'm gonna give you my love. Wanna whole lotta love.”

_ Is he trying to kill me? _

Without realizing it, Castiel started to move closer to the stage. Regrettably, Castiel couldn’t get right in front of the stage because of a large group of girls who were crowding it, losing their minds as they tried to touch Dean’s feet.  _ Back off, ladies _ _! H _ _ e’s mine!  _ He shook his head.  _ Where the hell did that come from, Castiel?  _ Castiel had never considered himself a jealous person. Evidently, he too could succumb to the green-eyed monster that had been controlling Dean for the past two weeks.  _ I’m going to have to apologize, aren’t I?  _ Still, even though Castiel knew Dean would be going home with him, seeing the way the girls were throwing themselves at him was pissing him off.

“You've been cooling. And, baby, I've been drooling. All the good times, baby, I've been misusing. A-way, way down inside. I'm gonna give ya my love. I'm gonna give ya every inch of my love.”

Castiel’s jaw dropped as he said aloud, “Oh, sweet Jesus, I’m going to die.” At that moment, Castiel was starting to regret checking his coat.  _ This is embarrassing... _

Dean smirked as he sang the lyrics, “I wanna be your backdoor man.”

_ Fuck you, Winchester! Fuck you so hard right now! _

By the time Dean was singing the final notes of the song, Castiel was panting with desire and his erection was becoming more than painful.

“Thank you, everyone! We are Raised from Perdition! We hope you all enjoyed the show! Goodnight!!!!” All four members of the band bowed.

Girls were going nuts over Dean. Castiel couldn’t blame them. After a performance like that, anyone would want to eat him alive. Figuratively speaking, of course.  _ What the hell does he see in me when he could literally have his pick of anyone? _

When the house lights turned on, the band started to pack up to get ready for the next band. As Castiel approached the front of the stage, he was afraid he might spontaneously combust from the cocktail of emotions and hormones that were flooding his system. Part of him wanted to smite anyone who dared to look at Dean . T he other part of him wasn’t sure if he’d be able to wait for Dean to finish packing everything up.

Once Castiel was right next to the stage he announced his presence by saying, “Hello, Dean.”

When Dean’s eyes locked with his, he gave him a lascivious grin.

_ God, am I that obvious? _

“Hey, Cas. Comments? Questions? Complaints? Concerns?” Dean questioned rhetorically as he winked at Castiel.

Castiel raised an eyebrow at Dean, then pursed his lips. “I would hurry up if I were you.”

Castiel watched as Dean’s gaze drifted down to where he was sporting a fairly obvious erection. Dean wet both of his lips before he bit the bottom one to suppress a grin. He turned his back on Castiel to help the band pack. Dean’s right hand ran through his hair; then it settled at the nape of Dean’s neck. Castiel could see his indecisiveness about probably saying "fuck it" even though he couldn’t see his face.

Castiel tried and failed to suppress his smile.  _ Maybe I should help them pack up to speed this process up.  _

“Hey, Winchester! Good job tonight. Nice to see you didn’t suck as much as usual.”

Castiel’s neck snapped in the direction of the person to whom that comment belonged to.  _ I’m going to rip your fucking head off!  _ Once again, he shook his head to clear it.  _ Where the hell is all this possessiveness coming from? _

“Hey, Milligan. Did your balls finally drop or do you plan on screeching up here as usual?” Dean glared at the man who made the snide remark.

The person Dean called Milligan sneered at Dean’s question. “Nice one. Think that one up all on your own or did Pam give you that one?”

“Shove it up your ass, Adam,” Pam hissed.

Adam put a hand over his heart “Oh, you slay me with your words.” He looked around at all of them. “So, do you plan on being done some time today? These lovely people came to see my band perform. You’re all kind of keeping that from happening.”

Pam raised one of her sticks, then analyzed it before giving him a smirk. “Hey, Milligan? How about I take this here drumstick and slide it right into your urethra? We’ll all get to see if you can hit a note that’s in tune for once.”

Adam flashed Pam a smug grin. “You always look so beautiful when you’re being a bitch. How’s Jesse?”

“Oh, that’s it you son of a…” Pam was charging towards him when Benny grabbed her.

“Why don’t you get off the stage and wait, ass-hat. We’d move faster if you weren’t being such a dick,” Dean barked, his fists balled at his sides.

_ Damn… I’ve only seen him look at Alastair that way. _

“Oh, no problem, Dean. I’ll wait. I know plenty of these patrons are willing to wait for The Forgotten Son. You were just a shitty appetizer. I’m the hearty meal and the sweet dessert,” Adam boasted.

“The Forgotten Son?” Castiel asked.

Adam beamed. “Heard of us, have you?”

Castiel’s head tilted. “I think so. My cousin, Zar, spoke of a band which had a name close to yours. I believe his exact words when he described you were , ‘they’re absolute shit, and they sound like cats screaming in the dead of night.’” Castiel nodded as he started to recall more of the conversation he had with his cousin before Thanksgiving. “Then, when I asked if your band was truly that bad he replied with, ‘To be honest, even that is putting it nicely. Their music is an atrocity to the senses. Painful to the ears.’”

Pam started cackling behind him. “Oh, fuck! This is fucking priceless. Where is your fucking cousin so I can buy him a drink?”

“London,” Castiel answered before he turned back to Adam. “You see, I tend to trust his judgment. My aunt is extremely musically inclined and taught us well. So, if any of what Zar told me is close to correct, I’m surprised you even were able to acquire this gig, to begin with.” Castiel shrugged before he continued. “Demo or not, you’re still shit.”

“Oh, snap,” Garth said with a chuckle.

“He didn’t acquire it. He paid for it,” Dean divulged. “Isn’t that right, Milligan?”

“Fuck you, Winchester!” Adam hissed.

A girl in a tight white dress sauntered over to Adam, then caressed his right shoulder before she planted a gentle kiss on his cheek. “Woah! There’s no reason for all of this hostility, baby.”

The entirety of Raised from Perdition, as well as Jo and Sam, took in a gasping breath.

“What the  **fuck** are you doing here?” Dean questioned with a growl.

The blonde’s snake-like sneer lit up her face. “Hello, Dean. I missed you.”

_ No way… _


	41. Chapter Forty-One

The night had been going close to perfect. Yeah, Dean was nervous to see how Cas would react to his performance, but the boner in Cas’ jeans was more than enough proof that he shouldn’t have worried. His performance obviously had the desired result, and Dean was looking forward to making Cas’ birthday a memorable one.

Then, of course, Adam showed up. At first, Adam was doing exactly what he usually did. Pam was moments away from ripping Adam a new asshole. Dean was minutes away from either doing the same or embarrassing himself. He was still suffering from the wounds of, “You’re the moron.” However, Cas came out of nowhere with the most fantastically insulting reviews from his cousin Balthazar.  _ Next time I see Balthazar, I have to buy that dude a drink or something. ‘Cause that was fucking awesome! _

At that moment, Dean was ready to say fuck burgers at the Airport Diner and just go straight to his garage with Cas. Apparently, fate had other plans in mind.

Dean could only glare at the unwelcomed bitch. “What the  **fuck** are you doing here?”

“Hello, Dean. I missed you,” Lily replied with a sickeningly sweet sing-song voice.

From what Dean could tell, it took all of fifteen seconds for Cas to realize who the manipulative whore was. Within seconds his facial expression changed from one of bemusement to one of conceivable rage.

“That doesn’t answer my question, Lily. I asked you what the fuck are you doing here. Not did you miss me,” Dean hissed.

Lily smirked. “What? Can’t I come to see two of my favorite bands? After all, Dean, I haven’t missed one of your shows. I wouldn’t want to miss your first show since...” she paused before her smile brightened with mischief. “I was going to say May, but you missed that one, didn’t you ? I believe Al had a little job for you, didn’t he?”

_ Fucking bitch! Has to come here to stir the fucking shit, right? Can’t leave me alone. _ “The last time I saw you, I told you to go to hell. What part of ‘go to hell’ do you not understand? ‘Cause last time I checked, none of those words mean ‘Yeah, I want to see you again,’ do they?”

Lily made a move to walk closer to Dean. “Oh, come on, su…”

Cas stepped in front of her. “I don’t think he was making himself clear. So, allow me to elaborate. Get the fuck away from him,” he snarled.

Dean’s eyes widened with a mixture of shock and arousal.  _ Why is that all sorts of hot? _

Lily raised an eyebrow at Cas. “Oh, really? And how do you plan on keeping me from him, Castiel?” she asked as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Both Dean and Castiel’s eyes widened.

Lily smirked. “Yeah, that’s right. I know who you are.”

Luckily, Cas regained his composure quickly. “Well, I can have security search that cute little purse of yours for narcotics,” he replied dryly.

Lily’s face blanched.

“From what Dean has told me,” Cas continued, “you seldom , if ever , go anywhere without some form of drug in your possession. I can tell by your reaction tonight is no different.”

Lily chuckled humorlessly. “How do you plan on convincing security to…”

“Oh, Dean’s friends with Ira and Rowena,” Castiel interjected as he pointed towards the exit, then the bar. “Considering how well you  **think** you know Dean, I would have thought you would know that.”

_ Fuck! _

“Now, if you wish to avoid such issues, I suggest you leave,” Cas added.

Adam scoffed. “Excuse me? Who the fuck do you think you are?”

Rowena appeared out of nowhere before Cas had a chance to answer. “Now, boys. I believe this stage should be set for the next band already. I hate to send The Forgotten Son home without performing, especially since you paid for the spot. You have ten minutes, or I send you home, boys.”

Adam’s band which had been standing idly by up until this point started to chime in. “Dude, we haven’t had a gig in almost a month. Can we not do this right now?”

_ What the hell is that guy's name again? Isham or some shit? _

“I’m starving,” Pam mentioned. “Let’s just go eat already. Not that I haven’t enjoyed this, but I am in desperate need of gravy fries.”

Charlie tapped on Castiel’s shoulder. He was still staring daggers at both Adam and Lilith. “I’m going to go get our coats.”

Cas simply nodded as he continued to keep an unwavering eye on the two of them.

“Cas!” Dean called.

There was no movement made on Cas’ part.

“Cas, please?” Dean pleaded.

Cas’ head snapped towards Lily. “I never want to see you again. Do you hear me?”

Lily flipped him off as she stomped off in the direction of the bar.

Then, Cas turned his attention back to Adam. “Go scamper after your whore.”

“Cas!”

“What?!” The amount of fury behind his eyes was truly terrifying. When Cas’ gaze finally met Dean’s, his face softened. “I’ll be right there.”

_ I hope I never bring that out of him.  _ “Please, Cas. We could use your help.”

Charlie returned with the jackets. She handed Cas his scarf and jacket. “Let’s go help them, Castiel.”

Cas shook his head as if to clear it, then followed Charlie onto the stage.

“So, your Dean’s Cas, huh?” Pam asked as soon as Cas was in front of her.

Cas nodded after sparing one final glance in the direction Lily and Adam went off in. “Yes.”

“Well, my name is Pamela Barnes,” she said as she held out a hand for him to shake.

Cas shook the proffered hand. “It’s nice to meet you. Dean speaks very highly of you, as well as he has shown me every bruise and cut you have inflicted upon him.”

Pam threw her head back with a laugh. “Trust me, he earned and deserved every single one of them,” she added as she linked left arm with Cas’ right. “The guy on the guitar over there, that’s Garth Fitzgerald…”

“The fourth!” Garth interjected.

“No one cares, Garth!” Pamela yelled back.

Cas waved at Garth.

“Pam, can the introduction wait until later? We kinda have to be out of here soon,” Dean mentioned.

Pam waved him off. “That asshole can wait.”

Dean rolled his eyes.  _ Why do I even bother? _

“The guy packing up the sax is Benny Lafitte.”

Benny tipped his hat at Cas.

“It’s nice to meet all of you, Dean has told me a lot about you,” Cas said with a smile. “However, Dean is correct. Let me help.”

Dean grinned as Cas walked over to Benny to help him take the drum kit out to his truck.

“Now, who is this? I’m Pamela, who are you, sugar?” Pam asked as she sashayed over to Charlie and Jo.

Jo rolled her eye. “You know who I am, Pam.”

“Yes, I know. I was talking to this lovely redhead standing next to you,” Pam explained with a nod in Charlie’s direction.

“Charlie. I’m Castiel’s friend and…

“My girlfriend,” Jo nearly growled at Pam.

Pam’s eyebrows shot up in shock and confusion. “Girlfriend? I thought you didn’t swing that way?”

“Charlie is my exception. Always has been,” Jo snapped.

Pam shot a crooked smile at Jo before her attention fell back to Charlie. “Charlie, your hair is so beautiful. Natural or bottle?”

“Natural,” Charlie replied.

_ Oh, fuck this is going to be an issue. _

“I guess I’m going to have to take your word for it right now. Maybe…?”

Dean intervened before Jo had a chance to rip Pam’s head off. “Pamela! Leave them alone. We have to finish up here if you want to get your damn gravy fries at the diner!” Dean yelled.

“I hope you hold that thought, sweetie,” Pam said with a wink.

“Pam!” Dean barked.

“I’m coming!” Pam yelled back.

When Dean looked back at Jo and Charlie, he knew his previous thoughts were correct. Pam was about to start drama where drama didn’t need or ever deserved to be.

“What the fuck was that, Charlie?!” Jo barked.

Charlie brought her hand to the bridge of her nose, then massaged it with her thumb and pointer finger. “She asked me a question, Jo. I was answering the question. How was I supposed to know she was going to get all perverted and shit?”

Jo threw her hands up in frustration. “How about the fucking fifteen-minute conversation we had about tonight, huh?!”

“What should we do?” Sam asked as he finished wrapping one of the cords.

Dean shrugged. “I have no idea, man. I think it’s best if we stay out of…”

“I can’t shut this down, Jo! I don’t ask for people to flirt with me!” Charlie snapped.

“Oh, shit,” Sam mumbled.

“Fuck you, Charlie!” Jo snarled, then stormed off to the bathroom.

A massive part of Dean wanted to help the girls, but the look Ira was giving him told him he needed to hurry shit up.

Sam put a hand on Dean’s shoulder. “I’ll go try to see what I can do.”

“Thanks, Sammy.”  _ It’s crazy how this chick has simultaneously helped create this relationship and now ruin it. _

 

>>>>>>

 

“You’ve been good for him,” Benny said as he grabbed the snare drum out of Castiel’s hands to put it in his truck. “I’ve never seen him this happy or stressed, to be honest,” he added with a laugh.

Castiel stared down at his feet as his face flushed. “He worries too much. I can take care of myself.”

Benny snickered. “Yeah, I think you made that abundantly clear tonight, brotha.”

Castiel smiled internally.  _ See. Not a delicate flower.  _ “So, that was Lily, huh?”

“Yeah,” Garth confirmed as he handed Benny the hi-hat. “I’m shocked she had the nerve to show up tonight.”

Castiel nodded. “Her and Alastair seem to have a habit of showing up at inopportune times.”

“Yeah, you and Dean looked like you had other plans until Adam and Lily showed up,” Garth mentioned as he leaned up against the side of Benny’s truck. “Sorry about that, man.”

Castiel gritted his teeth and balled his fists. “It’s fine.”

“Sugar, with a look like that, it’s not fine,” Pam chuckled as she stepped outside with an amp and box filled with cords. “Garth , go help Dean with the other amps and boards. I’d like to get out of here sometime tonight.”

Garth bowed. “Yes, your majesty.”

Pam punched Garth in the arm, then turned to talk to Castiel again. “So, when’s the last time you got any?”

Castiel’s eyebrows shot up to outer space. “Pardon?”

“Well, you could cut the sexual tension with a fucking knife in there. Plus, the whole domineering territorial shit we all just witnessed. So, come on. How long has it been?” Pam asked as she elbowed Castiel in jest.

“I’d rather not discuss things of that nature wi…”

“Pam!” Dean snapped as he stepped outside with two of the amps. “Haven’t you caused enough fucking problems tonight? Leave my boyfriend alone!”

Pam crossed her arms over her chest. “The issues were already there if it caused that big of an issue, hotshot.”

“Pam,” Dean growled.

She held her hands up in surrender. “Anything else inside ? ”

Just then, Garth exited. “No. We’re set,” he answered.

“I’m going to go get Charlie and Jo,” Castiel announced, then walked inside.

“Sam is already in there with Charlie and… Well, I should probably come with you,” Dean mentioned as he followed him inside.

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed in bemusement. “Why? Don’t tell me it is about protecting me?” he asked with agitation.

Dean exhaled a deep breath. “Trust me. I wish it were that.”

_ What? _

The crowd had thinned quite a bit since Adam’s band started to set-up. Even though Rowena threatened to kick them out, she still let them stay even though it had been well over ten minutes at that point.

When Castiel looked over at The Forgotten Son, he received glares from not only Adam but also every other member of the band.  _ They’re all a bunch of assholes. _

“Looks like you made a few friends, angel,” Dean chuckled.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “I don’t care if they like me or not, they’re a band of sycophants and philistines. I can only imagine the amount of groveling they had to do to get that demo. Balthazar was thoroughly disgusted by them.”

“I can’t believe they were able to get airtime in jolly old,” Dean uttered in disbelief.

Castiel shook his head. “Oh, they didn’t. My cousin Michael probably passed along the demo as a way of a joke. Or my aunt. One of the two. I’m going to assume it was probably Michael.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed. “How did your cousin get his hands on their demo?”

As soon as Castiel caught sight of Charlie’s fiery red hair and Sam’s towering figure, he held up his finger. “Hold that thought.”

“Jo! Please, come out of the bathroom,” Charlie begged as she continued to knock on the door.

“Some people gotta actually piss!” a girl with short blonde hair declared from behind Charlie.

“Jo,” Dean said as he gently nudged Charlie to the side. “We’re all packed. It’s time to go to the diner.”

Jo threw the door open, forcing everyone to jump back. Her makeup was smeared, and her eyes were red. “I’m not going to the diner. Take me home, Dean.”

Charlie stepped forward to hold Jo. “Please, Jo. Can we just talk about this?”

Jo took a step back and held up her hand. “Don’t touch me!” She turned to Dean. “Please, take me home.”

Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Yeah, come on.”

“I want to go home, too,” Charlie said as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Jo rolled her eyes. “Ugh, whatever,” she scoffed, then stomped off.

“I’m gonna say goodbye to Ira and Ro, I’ll be right out,” Dean said to Charlie, Sam, and Castiel.

Charlie nodded, then followed the path Jo took with Castiel and Sam at her side. Her head hung low, almost as if in shame.

When the three of them got outside, they watched as Jo made a beeline for Garth and asked him if he could take her home. In all honesty, the guy looked utterly bewildered by the question but nodded as soon as he received confirmation in the form of a shrug from Dean as he walked out of the bar.

“I guess I’ll meet you guys at the diner,” Garth said with a wave as he followed Jo to his little car.

Benny and Pam waved at Garth and Jo as they left.

“Diner?” Benny inquired as he started climbing into his truck.

“Yeah, we’ll see you in a bit,” Dean replied with a nod.

“It was nice meeting you , Charlie,” Pam said with a wink.

Charlie didn’t respond to Pam’s farewell. Her shoulders slumped as she started to head towards the parking lot that was across the street from the bar.

“Pam,” Dean hissed. “We’re going to discuss your behavior tonight later.”

Pam pursed her lips and cocked an eyebrow at Dean. “Uh-huh. See ya there,” she said, then climbed into the truck.

“What happened?” Castiel asked when everyone was inside the Impala.

“Pam is a bitch who doesn’t know how to keep her nose out of other people’s business,” Dean snapped.

Charlie put her head in her hands. “It’s all my fault. I was basically drooling. I’m such an idiot.”

“From what Dean has said, Pam can’t help herself around beautiful people, Charlie. It was bound to happen,” Castiel said as he rubbed soothing circles onto his best friends back.

Charlie chuckled humorlessly. “Pfft, yeah. Like I told Jo ‘I can’t shut this down!’” she said motioning towards herself. “I’m so fucking stupid! Now, I’m gonna lose her because I’m a cocky bitch.”

“You’re not going to lose Jo,” Sam said from the front seat. “She loves you. She’s not going anywhere. She’s just confused right now. Give her some space. Then, you can talk to her about everything. She needs time. Just give her that.”

Dean nodded in agreement. “Sam’s right. She needs space and time.”

“But I don’t want to give her space and time. I need her!” Charlie sobbed.

Dean breathed out a single laugh. “You sound like I did two months ago.”

Castiel blushed. “Not the time, Dean.”

“Just sa…”

“Dean,” Castiel warned.

Dean held up a hand in surrender.

Before they knew it, Dean was pulling into Charlie’s driveway. Castiel wrapped his arm around his best friend’s shoulder. “Do you want me to come in with you?”

Charlie’s head snapped to glare at Castiel. “Don’t you dare cut your birthday short for me! You’ve been looking forward to tonight for weeks!”

“But you’re upset, Charlie. You would do the same thing for me,” Castiel urged.

Charlie shook her head adamantly as she wiped a few stray tears from her face. “No. You should enjoy your birthday. You guys go to the diner, and I’ll see you on Tuesday for our Christmas…” her face fell further. “What if she wants to cancel that now?!”

“We’ll figure it out.” Castiel squeezed his friend a little closer to him. “Are you sure you don’t want me to stay here with you?”

“I’ll be fine. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” Charlie hugged him. “Go enjoy what’s remaining of your birthday, bestie.”

Castiel kissed the top of her head. “I love you, Charlie.”

“Love you, too, Castiel.”

After they separated, Charlie said her goodbyes to Sam and Dean, then crawled out of the car.

Dean waited until Charlie closed the door behind her before he pulled out of her driveway, and made a left onto Lakeland Avenue.

“I hope they’ll be okay,” Sam said with a grim expression.

Castiel nodded minutely in agreement. “Me, too. You have no idea how long I’ve been rooting for them. Tell me what really happened?” he asked, turning to Dean.

Dean inhaled deeply. “Long story short, Pam instigated by hitting on Charlie. Jo freaked out. Then, Charlie snapped back at her. Obviously, that didn’t end well.”

“Obviously,” Castiel said with another nod of his head. “I wish Charlie would have let me stay with her.”

“Charlie wants you to enjoy your birthday, Cas,” Sam began. “She said it’s okay for you to leave. Generally speaking, she’s pretty honest.”

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed as his head tilted. “Cas? You never call me Cas.”

Sam shrugged. “Castiel is kind of a mouthful. I kinda like Cas.”

Castiel smiled.  _ Me, too. _

 

>>>>>>

 

The emotional rollercoaster of the entire night was enough to make Dean want to burst. He had no idea where the overprotective territorial Castiel came from, but he wanted to rip the guy's clothes off and call him sir.  _ I have some serious fucking issues. Maybe I should listen to Sammy and see a therapist. _

Even though Dean felt horrible for thinking it, he was happy Charlie refused Cas’ offer to stay with her.  _ I have plans, Goddamnit!  _ His plans had been delayed enough. If it weren’t for the tradition Raised From Perdition had, he would have said fuck the diner, but he didn’t want to let his band down. So, there he was, pulling into the diner parking lot just before midnight.  _ Can I just take him back to my place already? I think I’ve waited long enough. Five seconds in the parking lot is enough, right? _

Dean let Cas and Sam walk ahead of him while he took Pam to the side to talk about her behavior throughout the evening. The conversation went exactly where he thought it would. She had no remorse or regrets about what she did. Pam stood by her previous argument that the issue was already there if it caused such a huge fight.  _  I can’t win… _

Once Garth arrived, everyone sat down in one of the booths on the left side of the diner. The hostess gave them menus, but it really didn’t matter. At least for Dean, it didn’t. He knew what he was ordering as soon as he entered the diner: a bacon cheeseburger, and then for dessert, apple pie.

“To be honest, I used to love the pie here. Thought it was the best on the island until…”

Benny rolled his eyes. “Until you tried Briermere’s. We know, brotha. You’ve only told us about a million times.”

“What?” Dean shot back. “It’s true! It’s pie heaven in that place.”

Pam put a hand on the table as she focused all of her attention on Cas. “You have no idea how many times we have had to hear about that fucking pie, Cas. He went on and on about it. Then, complained when he gained a few pounds after he ate five of them.”

Cas’ eyes smiled as he gazed at Dean. “He loves pie. I’m happy he found what he calls ‘Pie Mecca’ since he has met me.”

Garth and Benny said “Awww,” in unison.

Pam and Sam rolled their eyes and groaned.

“Oh, come on, Pam, they’re adorable,” Garth said as he batted his eyelashes.

Dean stuck his hand into his water glass then flicked water at Garth. “Shut up, smartass.” Dean then turned to Sam. “So help me, if you say it, I will smack you.”

Sam smirked knowingly. “You’re the one who taught it to me. So, who’s really to blame in this situation, huh?”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Sam. “Shut up.”

The waitress came over, and they placed their orders. Everyone ordered cheeseburgers and fries, except for Sam. He ordered a greek salad with grilled chicken.  _ Friggin’ hippie! _ Pam added a side of turkey gravy for her fries, Benny and Dean asked for onion rings, and Cas ordered a milkshake.

Everything went exactly the way Dean had intended once they got their food. The conversation was mostly upbeat. At one point, a french fries fight ensued, but management put a stop to that quick.

Stories were shared. Most of them were how they met stories for Cas. First, to no one’s surprise, to tell their tale was Garth. Dean and Garth graduated high school together. They didn’t hit it off at first. Dean thought the guy was kind of weird, but he realized how big the guy's heart was and couldn’t help how close they eventually became. Of course, having almost every single class with the guy for three years helped.

Benny was next, which was a surprise. Even though Cas confirmed he already knew how he had met Dean, Benny told him it was more than just music with them. Just like Garth, Benny and Dean had been through a lot together. They always had each other’s back , f or better or worse.

Then, it was Pam’s turn. “Well, these three would be lost without me. Garth was in Psych 101 with me last year. He saw me twirling my pen in my hand and banging it on my desk the first day and flipped,” she began. “Dude was shy at first. I kinda have that effect on men.”

Benny, Dean, and Garth groaned while they rolled their eyes.

“You know it,” Pam argued. “Anyway, we had a group project, and Garth couldn’t keep it to himself anymore. Apparently, he’d already told these two here about me, and they wanted to hear me play. I said what the hell, why not and now here we are,” she said with a wave of her hand.

Cas smiled at the four of them with admiration. “You’re all incredible musicians. It was wonderful listening to you tonight.”

“From what Dean has told us, you’re quite the musician yourself,” Benny added.

Cas blushed. “I’m decent.”

Dean scoffed. “Fucking understatement, babe.”

Cas bowed his head to hide his deepening blush. “I suppose you’re right.”

Dean kissed Cas on the cheek. “Trust me, angel. I know I am,” he whispered loud enough so only Cas could hear.

“Dawwww! Awen’t they sweet,” Pam cooed mockingly.

Dean glared at Pam.  _ If we weren’t already yelled at, I would be throwing fries at her! _ “Fuck you, Pam. You’re just jealous I got myself a boyfriend.”

She crossed her arms over her chest and rolled her eyes. “Uh-huh, sure,” she snarked sarcastically. “Totally.”

_ I’m right. _

Once they finished their cake and pie, they all paid their part of the bill, then got ready to leave.

While Cas was busy saying goodbye to Benny, Sam came over to Dean and mumbled. “Garth agreed to take me home. You and Cas are free to be as mind-numbingly gross and fluffy as you want.”

Dean beamed at his little brother, then mussed up his hair. “Thanks, Sammy.”

“Ugh, stop, Dean! Not the hair!” he griped.

Once everyone said their goodbyes, and Cas did his signature head tilt at Sam telling him Garth is taking him home, Cas turned to face Dean at the exit of the diner. “It was nice meeting your friends. They’re your family, aren’t they?”

Dean shot Cas a crooked smile. “Yeah, that’s definitely the best way to put it.”

“So...” Cas said as he threaded his pointer fingers through the front belt loops of Dean’s pants. “I guess we’re alone now.”

Dean smirked. “Would you look at that? I guess we are.”

Cas’ face lit up with one of his gummy smiles. “Any plans?”

“Oh, I’m sure I can think of something,” Dean divulged as he grabbed Cas’ hand and led him to the car.

 

>>>>>>

 

After the night Castiel was having, there was no way in hell he was going to wait to get to wherever Dean was planning on taking them. As soon as they reached the Impala, Castiel pinned him against the driver side door with his hips, then licked into Dean’s mouth without anything resembling a fight from Dean.

As Castiel was taking control of the kiss, Dean’s hands slid from Castiel’s lower back into the back pockets of his jeans where he squeezed both globes of Castiel’s ass, forcing Castiel to rut against him. Delicious friction from their aching erections caused them to moan into each other’s mouths.

When Castiel broke the kiss to take in a few breaths, Dean used the opening to nibble and lick where Castiel’s pulse point was pumping away. As Dean’s teeth grazed along Castiel’s neck, he let out a gasp and a whimper. Moving his hand from the nape of Castiel's neck to the back of his head, Dean forced him back for another kiss where he sucked on his tongue. Still, when Dean put his leg between Castiel’s and once again rutted against him, Castiel knew they had gone far enough.

“Okay, we have to go somewhere that isn’t here now,” Castiel stammered as he tried to catch his breath.

Dean, however, seemed to have other plans in mind as he once again started to assault Castiel’s neck with tender kisses and light nibbles.

“Dean,” Castiel growled.

Dean didn’t listen.

_ Ugh, I couldn’t wait. I just had to start something I couldn’t finish.  _ “Dean, if you don’t get in the car, I will give us both blue balls just to be spiteful.”

Dean groaned against Castiel’s neck but stopped what he was doing. “Sorry,” he breathed against Castiel’s shoulder as he tried to regulate his breathing. “It’s just… You have no  **fucking** idea how sexy you are. You drive me nuts.” Dean’s hands started to wander all over Castiel’s body. “I want you. All of the time.” Suddenly, Dean switched their positions where Castiel was now the one pinned to the side of the car.

“Dean, I wasn’t kidding. We need to get into the car. We can’t do this out in the… mmm,” he moaned as Dean kissed along his jawline, then nibbled his earlobe.

When Dean sealed their lips together for another deep, breathtaking kiss, his right hand began to slowly trek down Castiel’s stomach to the front of Castiel’s jean’s where his hand settled. He grasped Castiel’s dick through his pants and rubbed at a maddeningly slow pace as he continued to ravage Castiel’s mouth.

_ Fuck! He’s going to make me cum right here!!!!!! _ Castiel pushed Dean away with all of his strength, causing Dean to trip over his own feet. Thankfully, he didn’t fall. “We need to get in the car now. I will not cum in my pants in public! The last thing either of us needs is to be arrested for public indecency.”

Dean exhaled an exasperated breath. “Fine! Get in the car,” he ordered as he held the door open for Castiel.

“Where are we going?”

“I have a plan, but honestly if I didn’t, I wouldn’t care. If I don’t get my hands on you, I will explode or destroy something.”

Once Dean was in the driver seat, it seemed as if he couldn’t get out of the parking lot fast enough. Castiel moved as close to the passenger side door as he possibly could to avoid causing a car accident. There wasn’t a single doubt in Castiel’s mind that if he did move away from the door and let himself touch Dean, he wouldn’t be able to control himself.

About ten minutes later they pulled in front of a house Castiel could only assume was Dean’s. At first, he was worried Dean wasn’t going to pull into the garage, but after a minute of fumbling, Dean found the opener. The garage was huge. Which only made sense considering Bobby’s line of work and Dean’s hobby. There was another gorgeous classic car in the garage and Bobby’s pale blue truck in the driveway.  _ Yup, definitely Dean’s house. _

A large part of Castiel was insanely nervous. Dean was extremely experienced. From everything he had been hearing about him, Dean was what people would call a player.  _ What if he no longer wants me after tonight? People do that, right? They call it “Hit it and quit it,” right?  _ Castiel up until this point had only one experience, which he was trying incredibly hard not to think about.  _ He’s not him. Dean would never force anything on you. You want this! _

When Dean finally pulled into his garage, Castiel let go of the door handle and quickly crawled into Dean’s lap, straddling his hips. He pushed all dark thoughts to the back of his mind.  _ You’re safe. This is Dean.  _ He grabbed both sides of Dean’s face and kissed him with a ferocity he never realized he possessed.

Dean pulled his head back “Wouldn’t you rather do this in the back seat?”

Castiel rolled his eyes in frustration. “Dean, you have been teasing me all night. Are you fucking serious right now?”

Dean had the audacity to chuckle. “There’s more room. That’s all I’m saying.”

“There is absolutely nothing funny about this.” Castiel narrowed his eyes at Dean, trying to appear stern and failing miserably. “Fine . W e’ll get into the back seat if it makes you happy.” He winced as he moved off of Dean’s lap. “My pants are becoming quite uncomfortable I’ll have you know.”

“Then, take ‘em off before you get into the back seat. You won’t need them anyway.”

Castiel couldn’t help it when his jaw dropped. Thinking something may happen was one thing. Knowing it and hearing it was something else.

“What? I’ll take mine off, too. Only if you want.”

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed. “Why wouldn’t you take your pants off?”

Dean shrugged. “Birthday gift?”

Castiel smirked. “Us both achieving orgasm would be a lovely gift. I think we’ve waited long enough, don’t you?”

Dean threw his head back with a laugh. “Understatement, angel.”

Once they were outside the car, they watched each other as they quickly removed their pants, shoes, and jackets.  _ Shit, it’s cold in here!  _ Castiel could tell that, just like him, Dean could not wait to throw the back doors of the Impala open and ravish him. Every time their eyes met as they stripped, Dean’s eyes were filled with a visceral desire.

When they were finally in the back seat, Castiel grabbed the nape of Dean’s neck so their lips could finally meet. Castiel opened his mouth, letting Dean’s tongue move in beside him so they could tease one another, then bit his bottom lip.

It wasn’t long before Castiel was spread out on the back of the Impala’s backseat, his breathing erratic from the excitement of finally having a chance to be with Dean. Honestly, he knew he had wanted to be with Dean from the moment he first met him. Just the idea of something happening had got him through some rough points even after their argument in the auditorium.  _ Dean’s gorgeous. I would have to be insane not to notice it. Crazy to not want him… Actually, even if I were mad, I’d probably still want him. _

Dean draped his body over Castiel, then placed a lingering yet gentle kiss on Castiel’s lips. The apprehension of what Dean could have possibly planned for Castiel’s birthday was driving him nuts. However, as soon as Dean started to thrust his hips against him, all thoughts that did not relate to the unbelievable feeling of their cocks rubbing together through the thin fabric of their boxers disappeared. An overwhelming wave of pleasure ran through Castiel’s body causing him to dig his nails into Dean’s back.

A close to pornographic moan escaped Dean’s lips as Castiel wrapped his legs around Dean’s waist, then dug his fingers into his muscular back. A wanton groan and a thrust so hard he was nearly dry humping Castiel was Dean’s response.

_ I need skin! _ Castiel’s hands moved to the bottom of Dean’s shirt to signal that it was time to move whatever was going to happen along.  _ I don’t want to cum in my boxers. _

Taking the hint, Dean leaned back momentarily to take off his shirt. His gaze drifted over Castiel’s body as he removed his shirt, as well. An affectionate smile spread across Dean’s face.

Castiel could feel his face flush at the feeling of Dean’s eyes perusing over every inch of his skin. “What?” he asked.

Dean’s eyes were filled with the same grin. “I’m just a very lucky man.”

_ Pfft… You’re just saying that because… _

“I’m not just saying it because I want you. I’m saying it because it’s true.” Dean planted a soft kiss on Castiel lips, then whispered, “And I don’t lie to you. You’ll always be my exception, Castiel.”

Castiel smiled. “Well, Mr. Winchester, what do you plan on doing with me now that you have me where you want me?”

It far from escaped Castiel’s notice that when he said  “Mr. Winchester,” Dean’s pupils dilated further causing whatever semblance of color he had in his eyes to disappear.  _ I guess he likes that. _

After one more breathtaking kiss, Dean began to trail his tongue down Castiel’s neck to his right nipple. When he bit then sucked the nub between his teeth, Castiel threw his head back with a moan, then bucked his hips up against Dean.

Castiel could feel Dean’s smirk against his chest. “Assbutt.”

Dean giggled. “But I’m your assbutt,” he replied, then went right back to paying his left nipple the same attention as the right.

“Oh, fuck!” Castiel breathed as his entire body started to tingle with a pleasure he never knew existed. He could feel his cock quivering as it began to drip copious amounts of precum all over his boxers.

Whatever amount of hesitation Dean once had seemed to disappear in the back seat of his car as his hand slid right past the band of Castiel’s boxers and grasped his cock. “Fuck, Cas! Is this turning you on?”

Words were failing him. All Castiel could do was nod his head.

“I bet I could make you cum like this, couldn’t I?” Dean asked with a crooked smile.

Castiel blushed.

A huge smile spread across Dean’s face. “Well, as much as I’d love to test that theory right now,” he began to stroke the length of Castiel’s cock as he spoke causing Cas’ eyes to roll to the back of his skull, “I have other plans in mind.” Then, Dean went right back to teasing Castiel’s left nipple.

Momentarily, Dean’s mouth disappeared from Cas’ left nipple. Castiel didn’t think anything of it until he felt a wet finger being placed right up against his pucker. His entire body locked up as he squeezed his eyes shut tight.  _ You’re safe, you’re safe, you’re safe… _

“Cas? Cas?!”

Castiel’s eyes shot open and landed on two panicked green eyes. “Yeah?”

“Are you okay?” Dean asked as he backed off completely.

“I-I…” Castiel stammered. “Can we hold off on that? I don’t think I’m ready.”  _ Ever... _

Dean gave Cas a crooked smile. “Sure, angel. I’ll take care of you.” Dean stole one final kiss before he started to lay gentle kisses down the length of Castiel’s torso. He spared a moment to place a small kiss on Castiel’s scar. “You’re so fucking gorgeous, angel.”

Castiel’s blush deepened.  _ Someday I may even believe you. _

“So, you have a choice.”

Castiel eyebrows furrowed.  _ What? _

“Do you want me to make you cum this way, with my hand on your cock?”

Castiel’s eyes widened.

“Or with my mouth?” Dean pulled Castiel’s boxers to just underneath his balls, then licked up the length of his cock.

Castiel hissed, then whimpered from the sensation of Dean’s talented tongue.

“Mmm. Delicious.”

“Please…” Castiel begged.

“Please what? Please make you cum this way or with my mouth? You’re going to have to be more specific, babe,” suggested Dean as he stroked his cock maddeningly slow.

Castiel’s jaw dropped.

“Let me aid you in your decision.” Dean’s head once again licked up the length of Castiel’s dick, then devoured it whole until the tip hit the back of his throat.

“Holy shit!” Castiel exclaimed as he threw his head back.

With one swift move, Dean removed Castiel’s boxers before returning to his previous ministrations. Dean teased the frenulum with his tongue, then swirled his tongue around the tip , j ust before he once again enveloped Castiel’s dick. He then applied gentle pressure with his tongue to the vein that ran up the length of his cock.

As Dean began to bob his head, Castiel hips began to thrust of their own accord. Castiel could have cum at the sight of his cock moving in and out of Dean’s mouth. Castiel had watched porn in the past . H e was a teenage boy . O f course, he did, but nothing had ever been as enticing or as sexy as Dean’s mouth filled with his cock. When Dean looked up at him and winked, Castiel nearly screamed for mercy.  _ He’s trying to kill me! _ Suddenly, Dean’s right hand slid up his torso up to Castiel’s left nipple as his right applied gentle pressure to his pelvis.  _ Fuck!   _ “Shit, Dean. You’re gonna make me cum!”

Dean’s mouth made an audible pop as he released Castiel’s dick from his mouth. “Then, I’ll ask you again, Cas. Which way do you want me to make you cum? With my hands or with my mouth?” he asked as he stroked Castiel slowly, then kissed and sucked on his hip bone. “Personally, I want to make you cum like this.” He sloppily took Castiel back into his mouth quickly, then released him.

Castiel threw his head back as his eyes rolled into his skull.  _ It’ll be a pleasant way to go at least. _

Dean’s smirk was as large as his ego.

_ Asshole. _

“So, which one is it? Either way, I’m going to taste you. If you don’t hurry up and choose, I’m going to choose for you.”

Castiel’s jaw dropped. He was speechless.

“Too late.” Dean deep throated Castiel and let his head linger there momentarily before he once more began to bob his head up and down Castiel’s sizeable length.

Again, without meaning to, Castiel’s hips started to thrust into Dean’s mouth. His hands threaded through Dean’s hair as he moved a strand off of Dean’s forehead. When he pulled the strands the way Dean liked it, a deep guttural groan escaped Dean’s mouth. The vibrations sent a zing of pleasure from the tip of Castiel’s head to his toes. “You’re. Fucking… Fucking… Ungh,” he stammered. Unfortunately, Castiel’s brain decided to check out.

The next words to come out of Dean’s mouth shocked him. “That’s right, fuck my face.”

“Wh-what?”

“Fuck it!”

After Dean’s second demand, Castiel gripped Dean’s hair tight, then began to thrust into the back of Dean’s throat. Dean’s saliva was pooling on his pelvis causing an incredible mess. As gross as Castiel found blowjobs like this in porn, as per usual, seeing Dean being wrecked by his cock was a whole different story. “Oh, God, yes! Take it,” he growled. With every gagging sound Dean made, Castiel couldn’t help fucking his mouth just a little harder. By the sound of Dean’s humming, he didn’t mind it in the least.

When he reached the precipice of his orgasm, he pulled on Dean’s hair so hard he was afraid he might have ripped some of the strands out. Then it hit him like a falling missile as he exploded. The strength of his orgasm made him black out momentarily. The next time he opened his eyes, Dean was pulling off of his cock and stroking himself to completion all over Castiel’s chest. From the way Dean collapsed onto Castiel’s chest, he could tell Dean was hit just as hard with his orgasm as Castiel was.

When both of them began to breathe easier, Dean’s mouth encased Castiel’s with his, licking into his mouth for a messy kiss. He could taste himself on Dean’s tongue. His cock made a trying twitch before Castiel decided to give them a rest for a bit.  _ We’re definitely doing that again. _

 

>>>>>>

 

There was no way in hell Dean could care about the obscene amount of cum gluing Cas and him together.  _ Well, maybe just a little. God, is it gross.  _ He watched as Cas started to breathe a bit more relaxed and smiled.  _ It’s about time. _

They had waited so long. Dealt with so much drama to get to where they were. For a moment, Dean was terrified he had stepped too far. Jumped the gun and ruined everything. Cas played it off as if he just wasn’t ready, which was probably right. Still, the way his eyes were sealed tight, and how his body seized up, there was something more going on inside that glorious brain of his that he was letting on. Dean knew to rid him of the memory of what Alastair had done was an impossible feat, but he would do anything for Cas.

Watching Castiel cum was a thing of beauty. His entire body locked up as he convulsed with one of the most powerful orgasms Dean had ever witnessed, as well as probably one of the most incredible he had ever experienced.  _ I can only imagine what being inside of him would feel like. _

When their breathing settled, Dean planted a messy kiss on Cas’ lips, then rested his chin on Cas’ chest as he continued to beam up at him. “Worth the wait?”

Cas’ chest rumbled with a laugh. “I’m fairly certain I blacked out as I came.”

“So… I’m guessing that means you enjoyed it?”

The bitch face he received in response was answer enough.

“Well, obviously, I enjoyed myself,” he said as he motioned in between them at his cum. “Speaking of which.” He reached under the front seat to grab the wipes and paper towels he kept in here for emergencies. Of course, by emergency, he meant getting ketchup all over him or Baby when he was eating a messy burger in the car. After he finished using the paper towels, he used the wipes, then put the garbage in a grocery bag he also kept underneath the front seat.

Once he was satisfied with the cleanup, Dean sat up against the left side of the car, opposite where Cas’ head was, with a dopey grin on his face.

“Why are you so far away? Come here.” Castiel was scooting himself up so he could sit up straight.

Dean blushed. “Sorry, I was enjoying the view.”

Cas’ eyes squinted as his brows furrowed in confusion. “Are you blushing? After what we just did, you’re blushing? Haven’t you done this before?”

Dean shrugged. “I have. It’s just...You… This is different, Cas. With you, I feel… I just feel more. Ya know?”

Cas nodded in understanding. “It’s mutual,” he said with a smile.

For a few moments, their eyes locked and lingered. Dean knew this was a major chick flick moment, but he wouldn’t stop this feeling for anything. The sense of his heart being so full he could burst.  _ God, when did I turn into a girl? I can’t even imagine what would happen if he ever... _

“Don’t,” Cas said with a frown.

“Don’t what?” Dean asked.

“Don’t let your mind go wherever it is going. I know that face,” Cas stated.

“What face?”

Cas cocked an eyebrow. “Charlie would be so proud of me right now. As Buffy said ‘You have but face.’ As in I’m happy right now but.”

Dean inhaled a deep breath. “It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

“No lying, Dean. You promised.”

Dean shook his head. “I promise, I will tell you some other time. Let’s just enjoy the moment. Come here.”

With a pout, Cas crawled across the back seat of the Impala, then rested his back to Dean’s front. “You’re infuriating.”

“Give me some time, angel. Discussing feelings and shit is not easy for me.”

“You’re lucky I l…”

Dean’s heart nearly exploded.

“Care about you so much,” Cas corrected quickly.

Dean leaned into Cas ’ ear and whispered, “It’s mutual,” then squeezed him tight. When he kissed Cas on the shell of his ear, he could feel Cas’ smile. “We should probably get you home. Your mom may murder me if I don’t get you home soon. Plus, it’s cold as fuck out here.”

Cas nuzzled in a little closer in a blatant attempt to avoid the inevitable.

“Cas…”

“Five more minutes.”

“It’s already past two.”

“So,” Cas grumbled.

“So, do you want to be able to do this again?”

Cas maneuvered himself so he could lay a hand on Dean’s chest. While peering up at him with piercing blue eyes he pouted and whispered, “Yes…”

“Then?”

Cas rolled his eyes, then grabbed his boxers and shirt off of the floor. “We could just say I stayed with Charlie because of what happened tonight.”

Even though he knew he shouldn’t, Dean took a moment to consider that.  _ Morning blowjobs sound fucking awesome. I could make everyone breakfast, and… _ “No, Becky will murder me if she ever finds out. Considering tonight was your birthday , she’ll sniff that shit out like a bloodhound.”

Without another word, Cas was out of the car and putting on the rest of his clothes.  _ Way to fuck shit up, Winchester. _ “Cas. I’m sorry. I just don’t want to ruin everything.”

“No, I get it, Dean. Apparently, even when my family isn’t here, they affect your decision making.”

“Cas, you know what I mean. I don’t want her to prevent future events like tonight.”  _ Why is he not getting this? _

“And here I was thinking about breakfast in bed and blowjobs in the morning, but what the fuck do I know.”

_ Jesus Christ, he read my mind.  _ “I want that, too, Cas. Just, please…”  _ I’m going to regret this. _ “Just make sure Charlie knows what you’re doing. Also, call your mom and tell her you’re with Charlie, too.”

The massive grin that spread across Cas’ face was enough to momentarily make him forget how fucked he will be if Becky were to find out.

Luckily, Charlie didn’t ask any questions when it came to them confirming stories if Becky asked. Even more surprising was Becky, not even second guessing Cas staying with Charlie.  _ Don’t get your hopes up. This is going to bite you in the ass. _

When they entered the house, Bobby was sitting in his lounge chair, drinking a beer, and watching The History Channel. As they approached the chair, Bobby said without looking at them, “It’s hilarious how everything to these people seems to be about aliens.”

“Well, they have some pretty convincing arguments,” Dean argued.

“If you say so,” Bobby said before he took another sip of his beer. “Hello, Castiel. Happy Birthday.”

“Thank you, Mr. Sing…”

“If you’re sleeping in my house, boy, you are to call me by my first name. None of this sir or Mr. Singer crap.”

“Yes, Bobby,” Cas replied.

“That’s better. Well, you boys be safe. Use protection and all that shit.”

“Bobby!” Dean exclaimed.

“What, I heard you two from inside the house. I’m surprised the neighbors didn’t call the cops.” Bobby took another sip of his beer with a smirk.

Cas put his head in his hands. His ears tinged red in embarrassment.

“Come on, Cas. Let’s go to my room before Bobby has anything else to add.”

“No screaming,” Sam added from his bedroom.

Cas shook his head in his hands. “I want to die.”

“You’re never allowed to do that,” Dean said with a grin.

“Well, aren’t you adorable,” Bobby cooed.

Dean grabbed Cas’ arm, then made a beeline for his room. He quickly locked the door behind him.

Cas sat at the edge of the bed, staring off into space.

“You okay, Cas?” Dean asked.

Once again, the massive smile was on Cas’ face. “Of course. Why would I not be?”

“No reason,” Dean replied with a reciprocating grin.

“So, do you have any pajama pants?”

Dean ripped off his shirt. “Well, now that you’re here I have other plans in mind.”

Cas seductively crawled up the bed, then unbuttoned Dean’s pants. “You read my mind.”

 

>>>>>>

 

**Charlie: Castiel is going to kill me.**

**Sam: Why?**

**Charlie: Because I told him I would lie for him after I already told his mom I went home.**

**Sam: Oh, boy...**

 

>>>>>>

 

“Who was that?” Chuck asked.

“Castiel.”

“What’s going on? Is he okay?”

Becky nodded. “Yeah, he’s fine. Just spending the night with Dean.”

Chuck’s eyebrows shot to the ceiling. “Um, what?”

“He said he was staying with Charlie, but Charlie already texted me earlier saying she went home.”

“And you’re okay with this?”

Becky shrugged. “He’s eighteen now. I can’t stop him.”

Chuck shook his head and smiled. “You’re always full of surprises.”

She kissed him on the cheek. “That’s why you married me.”

He turned her so he could kiss her lips. “One of many reasons, my love.”

 

>>>>>>

 

After once again wiping each other free of cum. Castiel put on a pair of pajama pants Dean offered him and crawled into bed next to his boyfriend. For once, Dean was willing to be the little spoon, which hardly ever happened. Even though Cas found he preferred being the big spoon, he never pushed the issue. He knew Dean was doing it because it was his birthday.

The almost slip of “I love you” was a complete surprise to him. He didn’t mean for it to happen. He had thought it a few times, but never actually meant to say it out loud. At least not now. Considering all of the directions the slip up had gone, the response he received was one of the better scenarios.

All in all, crazy ex-girlfriends, horrible bands, fighting friends, and food fights aside, Castiel had to admit it was one of the best birthdays ever.


	42. Chapter Forty-Two

The morning light crept in through the blue curtains of Dean’s room. Dean had been lying awake for almost an hour with a massive smile on his face. Cas was silently snoring against the nape of Dean’s neck with his arms wrapped around him. A few times Dean tried to get up to get some water, but every time Cas would hold him just a little bit tighter, and he couldn’t bring himself to wake him.

There was an overall feeling of contentment in the room. Dean was happy beyond all reason. More content than he could ever remember being. He was being held by someone who loved him. Loved him. The major league fuck up who was lucky to have anything or anyone in his life. Not to mention the guy who was holding him was talented, beautiful, caring, scary intelligent, and everything he had ever wanted — everything he ever needed.  _ I’m a lucky bastard. _ Dean was so proud of who they were, what they had become. Considering their rocky start and Dean’s sordid past, Dean was overjoyed to call Cas his.

After a while, Dean dozed off just to be awakened again by Cas with a mouth full of Dean’s cock. “Oh, fuck! Cas!”

Cas had a magical tongue. The way he swiped it against the slit and head drove Dean nuts. Not to mention, Cas was beyond enthusiastic about sucking on Dean’s cock. It was sloppy and rough just the way he liked it. The vibrations from every moan of pleasure Cas made set Dean off faster than he cared to admit.  _ It’s the morning, and he caught me off guard. Yeah, that’s what it is. _ As he came, Cas sucked him through another awe-inspiring orgasm. Humming his enjoyment as Dean’s release hit the back of his throat.

When the last shockwaves of Dean’s orgasm began to dissipate, Cas sat up and wiped his mouth, then said, “You should consider changing your diet.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed in bemusement. “What?”

“You should consider changing your diet,” Cas repeated dryly.

“No, I heard you. Just where did that come from?” Dean asked.

Cas pointed down at Dean’s now deflated junk. “You taste like burgers,” he explained. “I’ve heard that adding fruit to your diet changes the taste.”

“But you like burgers,” he snarked with a wink.

“I’m not saying you taste bad, quite the contrary. I’m just suggesting for health reasons.”

Dean shook his head with a crooked grin. “Shut up and kiss me.”

A bright smile lit up Cas’ face. “With pleasure.”

Dean let his tongue explore Cas ’ mouth as they kissed, tasting himself on Cas’ tongue. “Shit! You’re right.”

“Shut up and kiss me,” Cas reiterated Dean’s earlier demand.

Dean smirked. “I’m pretty sure we have something to take care of,” he mentioned as he started to trail kisses down Cas’ torso. “You see, there was this enormous thing pressing into my hip while we were kissing. I’m concerned for your health,” he jested with a pout.

Cas shook his head. “You’re ridiculous.”

Dean cocked an eyebrow at Cas. “I’m pretty sure I just told you, you have a massive cock. That’s a huge compliment.”

“I’m pretty sure I told you months ago that my dick is far from little and is aesthetically pleasing.”

“True, but if I believed everything everyone told me, how would I ever learn.” Dean wasn’t lying when he said Cas was enormous. Yeah, Dean wasn’t small. Actually, he was way above average. However, compared to Cas’ dick, he felt tiny. He found himself wondering what it would feel like in his ass — something he had never actually wondered before with any other partner. To tell the truth, he had never bottomed before.  _ There’s a first for everything. _

Cas once again shook his head. “Do you plan on doing something with my dick sometime today, or should I suck my own dick?”

Dean’s eyebrows shot to the ceiling. “Can you?”

“I haven’t tried since the surgery, but I used to be able to.”

Dean’s jaw dropped. “No fucking way!”

“I can try to show you if you’d like?” Cas suggested.

A significant part of Dean wanted to see if it was possible. “How about I suck your dick now and you show me that later.”

Cas shrugged. “Sounds good to me.”

Nothing was sexier than watching Cas getting off, to anything. It was the greatest aphrodisiac. Within a matter of minutes, Dean was hard again.

Cas was writhing underneath him, groaning out his praises in a strained voice.

Just like the night before when they finally got inside, Dean grabbed the both of them in one hand and stroked the both of them in tandem. He loved the feeling of their dicks moving together in and out of his fist. Within a matter of minutes,  both were cumming, sharing each other’s breath for a few moments as they kissed.

When they were just starting to come down from their orgasm - fueled high, Dean almost murdered his little brother who started to bang on the door. “You better be making applesauce pancakes to make up for all the grunting and moaning I heard last night,” Sam announced through Dean’s door.

“You’re just jealous, and you know it,” Dean hollered back.

There was the sound of a low scoff. “I know I’m not. My sex life is perfectly fine,” Bobby said as he walked away from the door.

Dean made a stink face. “Oh, God. I did not need to know that.”

Cas chuckled. “You’re telling me.”

Dean smiled at Cas. “Why aren’t you more upset by all of that?” he asked as he threw a thumb over his shoulder at the door.

Cas shrugged. “They waited until we were done. It’s a nice change.”

Dean threw his head back with a laugh. “Come on. Let’s go have breakfast.”

To appease Bobby and Sam, Dean did end up making applesauce pancakes. The entire time, Cas stood over his shoulder watching him. For some odd reason, Dean never told Cas how much he enjoys cooking. So, to show off his skills, he showed him a few nifty tricks he had picked up over the years from taking care of Sammy. Like for instance, instead of frying bacon on the stove. Dean used a jelly roll pan and put the bacon between two pieces of parchment paper on three-seventy-five until cooked. Or to give the pancakes crispy edges, instead of using butter when he cooked them, he used olive oil. He was kind of surprised that Cas didn’t know to add milk to the eggs to make them fluffier, but who was he to judge. Most people don’t start cooking at seven to make sure their brother was fed.

While Dean was busy making sure all of the pancake batter was used, Cas and Sam sat at the kitchen table debating over whether or not cultured meat is real meat.

“I don’t know, Sam. I understand it is made from animal cells, but I’ve heard it’s got a bite to it. Almost as if it tastes like meat but isn’t meat,” Cas informed.

“I get you, but hear me out. Think of all of the ecological benefits it could have using clean meat. Once the meat substance is perfected, we won’t have to have as many meat farms, especially when it comes to farming cattle. Methane is one of the major greenhouse gases. Clean meat could save the environment!” Sam argued.

“Sammy, you are not taking burgers and steak away from me. It’s not happening,” Dean bit from the stove. “You can keep your animal paste. Give me the actual steer, man.”

“Who asked you, Dean?” Sam inquired.

Dean turned around and gave Sam a bitch face. “Do you want pancakes or not?”

Sam huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. “I wasn’t saying it should happen now. I’m saying it’s a valid idea.”

“It’s a valid idea, Sam,” Cas began, “but many people are going to feel as Dean does. Plus, think of all of the people who make a living off of farming cattle. You would be taking jobs away from many people. It is a way to cut back on the world's carbon footprint, but you have to think of everyone in the big picture, and not everyone will agree.”

The debate continued like that until Bobby sat down and put a kibosh on the argument by saying meat paste burgers better not happen until he was dead and buried, then he shoved a piece of bacon in his mouth.

After breakfast, Dean asked Cas what time he would like to go home.

“Never. I like it here,” Cas replied with a smile.

“Cas.”

“What? I do.”

Dean shook his head. “Well, for one, it’s Christmas Eve. And secondly, won’t your family eventually go to Charlie’s looking for you?”

Cas exhaled a deep breath. “Ugh, fine.”

“Does Charlie know to take you home? Or is your mom going to pick you up?”

“I’m gonna call my mom,” Cas replied. He left the room to make his call.

“It’s good seeing that look on your face,” Bobby said from behind Dean.

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed. “What look?”

“Well, not to compare you to your father, but the way he looked at Mary.”

Dean swallowed hard. “What?”

“Have you told him yet?” Bobby inquired.

“Told him what?” Dean questioned even though he knew precisely what Bobby meant.

Bobby shook his head. “Dumbass,” he answered, then left Dean for the living room.

_ I can’t tell him. Bad things happen when I tell people that. _

 

>>>>>>

 

“Hey, mom,” Cas greeted as soon as his mom answered the phone.

“ _ Hey, sweetie. Are you coming home soon? _ ” Becky asked.

Castiel’s face screwed up in confusion. “You said you would come and pick me up whenever I was ready.”

“ _ I figured Dean was going to take you home. _ ”

Cas eyes widened. “What?”

“ _ Sweetie, contrary to your belief I wasn’t born yesterday. Just have him take you home. _ ”

“Mom?”

“ _ I’m not mad that you spent the night with him, Castiel. I am, however, angry that you felt the need to lie to me.” _

“Um… thank you. Also, I am sorry,” Cas said in all sincerity. “Not that I’m complaining or anything, but why are you okay with me spending the night with him, especially considering what you and Gabriel have been doing to us for the past month?”

“ _ You’re eighteen, Castiel. If you’re old enough to vote, you are old enough to make your own decisions. _ ”

Castiel was speechless.  _ Holy shit... _

“ _ So, can I expect you soon? _ ”

Castiel shook his head to clear it. “Yes. I will text you when we’re leaving.”

“ _ Okay. Love you, sweetie. _ ”

“Love you, too, mom,” he replied, then ended the call.

When he exited Dean’s bedroom and went to the kitchen, Dean was at the kitchen sink cleaning up breakfast.

Castiel walked up behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist. He kissed him on the back of the neck.

Dean melted into his touch. “Hey, handsome. What’s the verdict?”

“Whenever you’re done, you can take me home.”

Dean’s entire body froze before he turned around to look Castiel in the eyes. “Shit.”

Castiel shook his head because he knew exactly what Dean was thinking. “She’s not angry. If anything she’s just upset that I lied. She said if I’m old enough to vote, I’m old enough to make my own decisions. So, no worries.”

Dean narrowed his eyes at Castiel. “Are you sure? That doesn’t sound like Becky to me. Was she possessed or something?”

“If Gabriel and Kali can fornicate constantly, I should be able to do the same with my boyfriend.”

Dean smirked as his hands began to wander all over Castiel’s pajamas. “Well, I’m all sorts of okay with that, Castiel. I gotta take a shower. You wanna join me?” he asked as he nodded his head in the direction of the bathroom.

“Oh, please don’t fuck in the shower,” Sam groaned from the living room. “I need enough brain bleach as it is!”

Castiel leaned into Dean to nibble his earlobe, then whispered, “Only if you think you can be quiet.”

Dean shivered as Bobby hollered from his lounge chair, “Trust me, he can’t.”

“How the hell did you hear him, Bobby?” Dean asked.

“Neither of you idjits realizes you’re loud as all hell even when you’re not trying to be,” Bobby replied.

Castiel didn’t have to be told how red his face was. He could feel it.

Dean kissed the crook of Castiel’s neck. “I’m gonna go take a shower.”

“I should call Charlie. I’ve been thinking about her for hours now.”

“Even when we…”

Castiel punched Dean in the arm. “Not then, ass-butt.”

Dean smiled brightly. “Hey! I had to ask.”

Castiel pointed towards the bathroom. “Go take a shower.”

“Yes, sir,” Dean said with a salute.

“Yeah, don’t you forget it.”

Dean wiggled his eyebrows, then left the kitchen.

“Oooo, he told you,” Sam taunted.

“Shut up, Sam,” Dean snapped before he slammed the bathroom door shut.

Castiel made the short journey down the hallway to Dean’s room to call Charlie. Once the door was closed, he dialed Charlie’s number.

“ _ Hello, bestie, _ ” Charlie sobbed.

“Hello, Charlie. I’d ask how you are, but asking would seem to be rather stupid at this moment.”

“ _ She dumped me, _ ” Charlie cried. “ _ Looks like we’re going to have to cancel our Christmas plans. _ ”

“Screw the Christmas plans, Charlie!” Castiel exclaimed. “What happened since last night?”

“ _ Well, I waited until this morning to call her because I was giving her space, ya know? _ ”

“Yes.”

“ _ So, when she answered _ _ , _ _ she flipped! She said that I should have called her and said fuck it to giving her time and space. That she was testing me and I failed. I told her that I didn’t want to push her to talk if she didn’t want to talk, so I waited out of respect for her. _ ”

“Then what did she say?”

“ _ I don’t want to say what she said. _ ”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Charlie.”

“ _ She said she’s not you. _ ”

“She’s not wrong, but we did all tell you to leave her alone,” Castiel replied.

“ _I know, right?!_ _I just don’t get it! I’ve told her enough times not to be jealous of other people flirting with me, but every time someone comes onto me, she instantly assumes I’m going to jump them. I guess last night was the last straw._ ”

Cas racked his brain, but couldn't recall hearing about it. “You two have been arguing about this for a while?”

“ _ Yeah, Dorothy was flirting with me during practice after we started dating. Then, Gilda flirted with me during chorus one day. Another time, we went and saw Coco. Some random chick hit on me, and she lost it! _ ” Charlie shrieked.

“Look, Charlie, you flaunt your sexuality. You’ve known for years that you’re gay. You never questioned who you are or what you want. For Jo, well… It’s different for her. She just realized she is about a two, maybe three, on the Kinsey scale a little over two months ago. So, of course, she’s going to be jealous, Charlie.”

“ _ SHE HAS NO REASON TO BE JEALOUS! _ ”

Castiel had to hold the phone away from his head to keep Charlie’s scream from bursting his eardrum. “Charlie?”

Deep heated breaths came through the phone before Charlie spoke again. “ _ Yeah? _ ”

“Why are you yelling at me?”

“ _ You know I’m not yelling at you. _ ”

“Charlie?”

“ _ Fine… It’s just… I can’t talk to her about this, and I just miss her. So much. It’s Christmas, too, Castiel. I got her the coolest knife set. I know she’d love it. _ ”

“I’m so sorry, Charlie. Do you want me to come over?”

“ _ No… I have family coming over because of Christmas. I guess I can still do something on Tuesday? _ ”

Castiel smiled. “I wouldn’t miss it. I love you, Charlie.”

“ _ Love you, too, bestie! _ ”

As soon as Castiel hit the end button, Dean entered the room with a massive smile on his face, his hair still slightly wet from his shower. “What are you so happy about?”

Dean’s gaze slowly perused the length of Castiel’s body. His smile became more and more salacious as he scrutinized every inch of Castiel. “I like seeing you in here.” He moved closer, shutting the door behind him. “Wearing my clothes.” He stepped into Castiel’s space, sharing his breath. “I’m a lucky, lucky man.” his quickly licked Castiel’s bottom lip before planted a heated kiss on his lips.

Castiel willingly let the kiss overpower his limbic system. He gripped the back of Dean’s hair to force their kiss to deepen further. He loved pulling Dean’s hair because of the delectable whimpers and moans he would make.

Dean started to become pliant in Castiel’s hands, letting him do whatever he wanted to him. There was something so sexy about how submissive Dean was when they were intimate with one another. It was an enormous turn on for Castiel that he would never have to worry about Dean pushing him because he would always let Castiel take control.

“Get on your bed and take your shirt off,” Cas ordered breathlessly.

The grin Dean had been wearing when he entered the room once again returned to Dean’s face. “I fucking love how insatiable you are.”

“I’ve been dying to be with you since I met you,” he began to explain as he started to take off his clothing. “Then, I was tormented and tortured for a month. So, when I tell you to get your shirt off.” He gripped Dean’s shirt over his head, then pushed him on the bed. “I fucking mean it,” he growled.

Dean adamantly nodded his head. “Fuck yes. Whatever you want, Cas.”

Once Castiel was utterly naked, and Dean was fumbling with his pants, Castiel tried, and from what he could tell succeeded, to seductively crawl up from the foot of the bed to where Dean was nearly ripping off his pants with his boxers.

When Castiel reached Dean’s navel, he began to lick his tongue up Dean’s abdomen to his right nipple. He was quickly becoming more addicted to the little hiccup of breath Dean would make every time he would surprise him.

“Show me,” Dean breathed.

Castiel lifted his head from where he was previously teasing Dean’s nipple. “Pardon?”

“Show me how you can suck your own cock,” Dean begged.

Castiel smirked. “You want me to show you?”

Dean nodded. “Yes! I’ve had half a hard-on all morning thinking about it.”

After kissing Dean deeply, Cas went over to one of the walls and took a deep breath.  _ What the hell am I doing? Why am I showing him this? I must be insane. He’s going to be so grossed out by… _

“I can see your ears turning red from here. Don’t be embarrassed, Castiel. Look at me.”

Castiel turned away from the wall to look into Dean’s eyes. Without meaning to, every question that he would usually keep to himself started to pour out of him. “What if I get hurt? What if I can’t do it anymore? What if it grosses you out and you don’t want me anymore?”

Dean shook his head. “Well, to answer questions one and two, if you’re worried about either of those, then don’t do it. I would never force you to do anything you don’t want to do. Now, to answer question three. I think my rock hard dick is answer enough to that question.”

A ghost of a smile painted Castiel’s face. “Ok,” he agreed, then once again faced the wall. Luckily, Castiel was able to pull off the initial move to suck his own dick. His knees and feet touched the floor with ease as he manipulated his body to bend in half. The mere idea of Dean watching him do something so forbidden, so outrageously absurd, was enough to make his erection painfully hard.

When his dick passed through his lips, Dean and Castiel uttered a single moan in unison. He closed his eyes, savoring the taste of his own arousal on the tip of his tongue.

A click of a bottle sounded from the bed signaling what Castiel could only assume was Dean opening a bottle of lube to heighten the pleasure of his hand stroking the length of his cock.

Listening to the sounds of Dean’s palm moving against his now slickened cock, spurred Castiel forward in his task. He grabbed both globes of his ass to push himself further into his mouth. As he quickened his pace, he could hear Dean hasten his own.

The all too familiar fire began to burn in his belly as he fast approached his orgasm.

“Oh, fuck, Cas, you’re so fucking hot. Suck your cock. Yeah, suck it,” Dean demanded with a guttural groan.

Pushing himself further into his mouth, he started to gag on his own cock as he approached the back of his own throat.

“Oh, shit! I’m gonna cum. I’m gonna…”

Dean’s blissed-out moan of reaching his orgasm was Castiel's undoing. He willing swallowed all of his spend as it hit the back of his throat. When he was sure he took it all, Castiel rolled over to sit on his bottom, then let his head fall back to rest against the wall.

“You fucking swallowed your own cum, didn’t you?”

Castiel nodded weakly as his breath slowly began to steady.

Within moments, Dean was in front of Castiel, kissing him deeply. The kiss took his breath away.

_ I guess it didn’t gross him out. _

 

>>>>>>

 

Seeing Cas suck his own cock was by far the sexiest thing Dean had ever seen. Of course, Dean had seen plenty of porn of guys trying to suck their own dick, but Castiel’s tyrannosaurus prick definitely helped Cas along. The fact that Cas could gag on his own cock was fucking insane.  _ I’m ruined for everyone else. No one will ever beat that. No one! _

Once Dean stole another unimaginably glorious kiss, Dean cleaned himself off, then they both got dressed and ready for Dean to take Cas home. As they exited the house, Sam gave the two of them bitch face number eleven, then went to his room to internally scold them and maybe try to use some brain bleach while he was at it.

When they arrived at the Shurley residence, Dean put the car in park and faced Cas with a massive grin. “Do you want me to come in to deliver my presents now or Tuesday? I have all of them wrapped and in the trunk.”

A coy smile spread across Cas face. “I’m rather excited to show you your Christmas present, so yes. I would love for you to come in.”

“What did you get me?”

Cas rolled his eyes. The whole point of gift giving is for the gift to be a surprise, Dean.”

“Well, if you got me something awesome and my gift is lame as fuck, I want to make sure I have time to go find something better,” Dean explained.

“I’m sure whatever you got me is perfect.” Cas opened his door, then looked back at Dean. “Are you coming or what?”

Cas helped Dean carry all of the gifts into the house.

As soon as Cas unlocked the door, Dean yelled, “Merry Christmas!”

Dean’s favorite five-year-old, Hannah, hollered the entire way to the front door, “DEAN!!!!”

Thankfully, Dean planned ahead and put Hannah’s gift at the top of the pile. “I got you something, sweetie.”

Hannah gently grabbed the package Dean handed to her, then ran to what he could only assume was the kitchen table to unwrap it.

The sound of ripping paper filled the house as Dean greeted first Becky with a hug, then Chuck with a handshake.

“HEIHEI!!!!!” Hannah screamed.

Dean laughed. _ I guess she likes it. _

Becky’s face brightened. “Thank  **God** you didn’t get the hook.”

“I’d rather you call me Chuck, Becky,” Chuck jested. “I told him Heihei was safe.”

Becky smacked him gently on the forearm. “You wish you were God, Mr. Shurley.”

Chuck smiled with a shrug.

After receiving the universe’s biggest hug from Hannah, Dean watched them as they both opened his present to them. Becky beamed at the site of her “World’s Best Nurse” ornament. Chuck was equally ecstatic about his  _ Back to the Future _ Collector’s Edition Bluray set.

Apparently, Gabriel was with Kali doing a bit of last minute shopping, so Dean decided to leave his gift card to Godiva under the tree.

“My turn!” Hannah said as she handed him a small box.

“It’s from all of us,” Becky added.

Inside the tiny box was a pair of tickets for  _ Rock of Ages _ on January twenty-seventh. His jaw dropped to the floor when he saw the seats.  _ Third row, center?!?!?!?! They’re close to five-hundred a pop! _

“This is too much!!! You didn’t have to get me something like this!”

“Well, considering everything you’ve done, we figured we’d give you an early birthday and Christmas present,” Chuck explained. “Plus, my sister got them for us. So, she got a great deal.”

“Thank your sister for me, too, but this is too much. I can’t thank you enough,” Dean blurted.

“Dean,” Chuck began with a hand on his back, “trust me when I say it is nothing compared to what you’ve done for this family. So, enjoy the day in the city as well as a happy birthday.”

From the look Becky was giving Dean, there was no room for argument. So, even though he didn’t want to, he shut his mouth and kept his opinions to himself.

Out of nowhere, Cas grabbed Dean’s hand and told him, “Come with me. Your present is in my room.”

Dean had little to no time to take Cas’ present off the table before he was being dragged to the first floor.

When they arrived at Cas’ room, Cas instantly disappeared into his closet to grab whatever it was he got him for Christmas. He exited with two boxes in his arms. From the way Cas was holding them, Dean could tell how precious whatever in them was. He placed them on the bed with an enormous grin on his face, then said, “Merry Christmas!”

Dean hesitantly handed over his present. “Merry Christmas.”

Cas continued to beam as he took the present into his hands. “How do you want to do this? You or me first?”

“You first.”

Considering how fastidious Cas usually was, Dean never expected him to nearly rip the paper off of the box. When he pulled the frame out of the box, he did Dean’s favorite perplexed expression until he realized what it was. “Oh, my God, Dean!” he gasped. “This is extraordinary!” He held the frame up to the light to see which strip of the film it was. “I love the train scene,” he chuckled. He glanced up at Dean as he continued to marvel at his gift.

Dean was above the moon that Cas loved his gift.  _ Here I was worried. _ He sat down on the bed and began to unwrap the boxes, trying to hold them the same way Cas had.

“No!” Cas shrieked and took the box Dean was unwrapping out of his hands. “This one first.”

“O-kay…”  _ That’s not odd in any way.  _ He started to unwrap the second box. This one was fairly heavier than the last one. The moment he lifted the lid off of the unremarkable clothing box, he couldn’t believe his eyes. “Are these… are they… Holy fuck!”

“They sure are! I have to admit; I had to ask Sam to enter your room to look at your collection to make sure I didn’t buy a duplicate.”

“This is… Cas…” He flipped through the albums overwhelmed by every emotion he was currently experiencing.

“Now, you can open the next one. This one I was… Well, you’ll see.”

Dean recognized the cover instantly when he opened the box. “ _ Coda _ ! One of my favorite Zeppelin songs is… OH! MY! GOD!!!!!”

“I know, right? I was surprised Michael sent me that one, but he has more than one so he was willing to part with it.”

“IT’S FUCKING SIGNED, CAS!!!” Dean shouted. He shook his head. “I can’t accept this. It’s worth a fortune.”

“Yes, you can. I asked Michael. He was quite adamant that he meant to send that copy. And…”

“What the hell does Michael do for a living? He knew about Adam’s band, and he sent you these albums? How the fuck can he just afford to hand over a signed album by one of the best bands of all time?”

“He works at my Aunt Amara’s label.”

“Amara?” It took him a second to recall where he knew the name. “Amara Schneider? Obscurité Entertainment?”

Cas smiled. “You’ve heard of it?”

“Yeah, I fucking heard of them. Your aunt is the chick who was gonna sign Raised From Perdition back in May!”

Cas’ previous smile disappeared. “Oh.”

“Yeah, oh! Did you know?” Dean asked with more venom than he intended.

“Of course not!” Cas snapped. “Well, I knew my aunt settled for Adam’s band because another band she was obsessed with let her down, but I had no idea it was yours. Balthazar couldn’t remember the band name.”

Dean put the record down as he once again started to shake his head. “I know! I’m one massive fucking disappointment. Thank you for reminding me. It’s not like I didn’t already know.”

“Dean, I did not say that you were a disappointment. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me! Don’t act as if I have treated you as anything less than one of my best friends and the l- the one I have chosen to be my boyfriend. I don’t trust easy, and I chose to trust you. If you’d like, I can talk to my aunt and see…”

“Oh, so instead I’m a charity case who can’t do shit on my own. I think I can do it again all on my own, Cas. Thanks.”

“I did not mean it that way, and you know it,” Cas growled.

Dean stacked the records in the box that had initially held them, then without another word, he stood up and checked himself over to make sure he had everything so he could make a speedy exit. “I gotta go.”

“Dean. Please, don’t leave.”

“I gotta think, Cas. Just let me leave.” Dean stepped outside of the room, then exited the house through the back door slamming it behind him.

As Dean closed the gate, he heard the back door open and footsteps following quickly after him.

When he got to the car, he quickly opened the trunk and put the records inside.  _ I gotta get out of here. How the hell could I let this relationship get to this point? What the fuck is wrong with me? I don’t deserve him. I don’t deserve his family! _

As he climbed into the driver seat, Cas ripped the passenger door open and hopped in. “What the fuck, Cas?!”

“Why are you leaving?”

“I told you. I need to think.”

“I don’t believe you. You’re running.”

“I’m not running.”

“Really? Then, you forgot something.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Pretty sure I didn’t forget anything, Cas. Your present is in the trunk. Your parent’s gift is in my pocket.”

“Not the gifts. This.” Cas grabbed the lapels of Dean’s leather jacket and kissed him with a ferocity he didn’t know Cas possessed.

At first, Dean tried to fight it, but inevitably, as usual, he was helpless against the feeling of Cas’ lips on his. He melted into the kiss and willingly gave Cas the opening he desired.

After a few moments, Cas broke the kiss and rested his forehead against Dean’s. “Don’t leave me. I need you, Dean,” he breathed.

Dean shook his head. “I just need time to think, Cas. I’m not leaving you forever. Just for right now.”

“What’s there to think about, Dean? My aunt being who she is doesn’t change anything. I’m still me. I haven’t changed,” Cas stammered.

“It’s not only your gift, Cas. Your parents! They got us five-hundred dollar seats to see  _ Rock Of Ages _ . You do realize that, right?”

Cas rolled his eyes, so hard Dean was surprised they didn’t fall out of their sockets. “My aunt probably got them for free. She’s got her hands in every pot of the music industry. So, don’t worry about costs, Dean.”

“That’s not the point, Cas! I don’t deserve what I got! I don’t deserve…” Dean stopped himself from saying what he knew was right.

There was an uncomfortable silence inside of the car until Cas finally filled it. “Don’t deserve what, Dean?”

Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “It’s nothing. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“Don’t pull that shit with me. What do you not deserve? Don’t deserve gifts? Don’t deserve people showing how much they appreciate you and care about you? Don’t deserve praise? Help? What, Dean?”

“I don’t deserve you! Okay, Cas?! I don’t deserve you or your family. I don’t deserve your kindness! I’m a piece of shit. Fuck!” Dean ran his fingers through his hair in exasperation. “I fucked over my band for a chance to get high! What kind of fuck does shit like that, Cas?! I let your aunt down! Why the fuck do you want a piece of shit like me, Cas?”

Cas gently removed Dean’s hands from his head and held them in his own. “It has nothing to do with want, Dean. I  **need** you because you’re the man who defended me while others kept walking. I need you because you’re the one who came to see me every day while I was out of school. I need you because you’re the one who held me close every night when the nightmares came back.”

Dean tried to pull away from Cas because it was all becoming too much. “I don’t…”

“Stop! You’re being ridiculous!” Cas barked as he hit Dean’s shoulder. “You deserve happiness. You deserve me!”

Dean’s head fell back as he closed his eyes once again and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm his nerves.  _  I can’t be here. I have to go.  _ “Are you done? ‘Cause I gotta go, Cas.”

An incredulous gasp left Cas’ lips. “You know what? Yes. I’m quite done. I’m done trying to convince you that you mean more to me than anything. I’m done trying to prove you’re worth something in this miserable world. So, go.” Cas slid out of the front seat.

Even though Dean knew he had caused the mess of a scene that played out, anger and despair filled his heart as his head gently bowed towards the steering wheel.

“Oh, and, Dean?”

A flicker of hope-filled Dean’s chest until he saw the pain and fury in Cas’ eyes.

“Merry Christmas,” Cas spat, then slammed the door behind him.

As he watched Cas walk away towards the back gate, the reality of what had just happened finally hit him like a ton of bricks. Tears filled his eyes.  _ Way to go, dickhead. _


	43. Chapter Forty-Three

Gut-wrenching sobs began to stream down Castiel’s face as he made his way back to his room through the backyard. Part of Castiel wanted to turn around and tell Dean once again that he didn’t want him to leave. The other more stubborn part of him wanted to tell Dean to go fuck himself. How dare he act as if he were nothing, that he meant nothing! In Castiel’s opinion, it was beyond unacceptable for Dean to feel that way. _For Christ’s sake!!! I almost told him twice that I love him!_ The thought alone made his tears fall harder than before. _I love him so much…_

When he was finally inside the privacy of his room, he closed his curtains, shut off the lights, undressed, then crawled into his bed. _I should have waited until Tuesday. I’d still have Dean if I waited._

 

>>>>>>

 

Becky watched from the window as her son slammed the car door and walked towards the back of the house. “What just happened?”

Chuck joined her. “I think we may have freaked him out.”

The sound of Castiel crying filled the first floor as he entered the house.

“I should go see what’s wrong,” Becky said as she took a step to go downstairs.

Chuck put a hand on her shoulder to stop her. He pointed at the Impala that was still parked outside. “Something tells me whatever just happened in that car is hurting them both. Let’s just leave it be.”

“But…”

“No, Becky. Sometimes it’s best to leave things to the kids. I know you mean well, but let’s give our son the benefit of the doubt and let him resolve this one on his own.”

Becky crossed her arms over her chest. “When the nightmares come back, it’s your turn to lose sleep.”

Chuck raised an eyebrow at Becky. “Like any of us will be sleeping if they come back.”

“Where did Dean go, mama? Mr. Pengui wants to go on another adventure and Dean is the best when it comes to adventures,” Hannah said with a pout as she stood between her parents.

Chuck bent over to pick up his daughter. “He had to go home, but I can play Mr. Pengui if you’d like.”

Hannah shook her head. “No. I’ll wait for Dean to come back. He always comes back. He loves Castiel,” she added as she scrunched up her face with what could only be described as disappointment.

“We know, sweetie,” Becky responded with a kiss to her cheek.

The front door opened. An extremely confused Gabriel entered along with the abrasive Kali. “Anyone care to explain why Dean just drove away crying when I pulled into the driveway?”

Hannah’s face fell. “Dean was crying? Is Dean okay?” She wiggled herself free and started to make her way down the stairs. “CASTIEL!!!!” she yelled.

Gabriel snatched Hannah up. “Oh, no. You’re staying up here little one. I’m pretty sure he needs some alone time right now. You can ask him what’s wrong later.”

Tears started to pool in Hannah’s eyes. “But, if Dean is sad, then Castiel is sad. I don’t like Castiel sad. I want to see my brother.”

Becky took Hannah into her arms as she started to cry a bit harder. Not to mention Kali began to roll her eyes at the entire scene. _Why on earth is he dating her? The rancid bitch._ “It’s okay, sweetie. Let’s go play with Sergeant Penwing and let Mr. Pengui a rest, okay?”

“But Charlie is Sergeant Penwing,” Hannah whined.

_Ugh, it’s going to be a long night._

 

>>>>>>

 

The front door slammed open. Sam was formally preoccupied with some overdue... well, overdue for him, AP US History studying in his room. _Dean’s home already?_

“What the hell are you slamming doors for in my house, bo… Dean, are you okay?” Bobby asked.

Dean didn’t answer, but Sam could hear his heavy footfalls from his bedroom. He quickly poked his head outside his door to see what was wrong. What he saw was the last thing he expected.

Dean’s arms were wrapped around a squashed up clothing box. His eyes were bloodshot and swollen with the reminiscence of tears. He pushed past Sam and went into his room.

_What the hell happened?!_

Sam knocked on Dean’s door. He already knew what to expect, but he had never seen Dean look so forlorn. “Dean? Can I come in?”

“Go away, Sam,” Dean grumbled trying to mask his sobs.

With a deep breath, Sam tried again. “Dean, please. Talk to me. What happened?”

“GO AWAY!!!” Dean screamed.

“It’s Christmas, Dean!” Sam snapped.

“Fuck Christmas.”

“Dean, come on, just talk to me.”

“FUCK OFF!!!”

“Knock it off, the both of ya,” Bobby growled as he joined in. “None of this fuck off shit on Christmas, idjit!”

“Just leave me alone,” Dean groaned.

Sam turned to Bobby. “What are we gonna do, Bobby?” He asked in a whisper. “Dean’s never like this. Something must have happened at Cas’ house. How are we gonna fix this?”

Bobby leaned up against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. “Do I look like Dr. Phil? I have no idea. Just leave him alone. He’s gotta come out eventually. You can interrogate him, then.”

Eventually, Dean did come out of his room, but it wasn’t to talk. He came out for some Chinese food, then went right back to bed.

_It has to get worse before it gets better, right?_

 

>>>>>>

 

It was only getting worse. Castiel's nightmares were back with a vengeance. He had spent most of Christmas in his room. Of course, with some coaxing, he did come out to eat, but he spent most of his time at the dinner table playing with his food instead of eating it. He broke up with Dean. He told Dean he was done. Dean was gone.

There was no joy in gift giving. As his family opened the gifts he had ordered for them, he sat there in silence only thinking of Dean and how he should have waited until Tuesday. Now, Christmas was ruined because of his inability to wait. A small part of him blamed Michael for sending a signed copy. He asked for average originals, not a signed copy. Which, after some research, he'd learned was worth well over a grand. _No wonder he freaked out._

By Tuesday, Cas was ready to die. He was starving, yet he had no appetite to eat. Food turned to ash in his mouth. His stomach was full of nothing but water. _It’ll have to do._

When his phone started to vibrate, he answered quickly praying it was Dean. “Hello?”

“ _Hey, Castiel. Are we still on for today?_ ” Charlie asked.

He had completely forgotten. “Your place or mine?”

“ _Do you mind if I come to you? There are too many memories here._ ”

The only problem was it went both ways in this situation. “How about you come here, and we go for a walk.”

“ _A walk? Castiel? You do realize it’s below freezing out, right?_ ”

“Oh, yeah… right.”

“ _Are you okay?_ ” Charlie asked, her voice laced with concern.

“No,” Castiel sobbed.

“ _I’ll be there in ten._ ”

 

>>>>>>

 

**Charlie: WHAT DID DEAN DO?!**

**Sam: I wish I knew. He’s been an asshole for two days now.**

**Sam: Christmas was shit. When he wasn't an asshole, he was holed up in his room blasting every sad song in his repertoire.**

**Sam: If I have to hear “Nothing Else Matters” one more time, I’m going to scream.**

**Charlie: Castiel was just crying when I spoke to him on the phone. I just got to his house. I’ll text later.**

 

>>>>>>

 

Like idiots, they did end up going for a walk. They bundled up as much as humanly possible and walked to the swing sets, coffee mugs in hand, at the elementary school up the street from Castiel’s house. After a few moments of silence on the swing sets, Charlie put her own coffee mug into the wood chips and turned to her best friend. “So, what happened?”

“I kind of…” Castiel paused with a hiccup of breath. “I broke up with Dean.”

Charlie’s eyes widened in shock. “What?!? Why?!?”

For fifteen minutes, Castiel explained everything that had happened from the moment Charlie left that night to the moment she called earlier that day. By the time Castiel was done explaining everything, she was already blaming Dean. “So, you gave him that badass gift, and he freaked out?”

“I just wanted to make him happy. Where did I go wrong?”

Charlie shook her head in exasperation. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Castiel. Geez, neither of us did. Both Jo and Dean have their own insecurities, and they’re taking it out on the people who love them because they have no idea how to deal with their emotional problems.”

“Not that I do too much better, Charlie. Look how I’ve let Alastair control my entire life,” Castiel added.

“Well, what if you say fuck it one more time and go to Meg’s New Year’s Eve party?”

Every year, Meg threw a party on New Year’s for the stage crew, and whoever else was involved with the musical. Every year Castiel was invited, and every year he said no. “I don’t know, Charlie. I don’t think that would be the best idea.”

“I think it would be an awesome idea! It’s time you start living. Plus, since this is a closed party, there is no way in hell asshole will be there.”

Cas seemed to mull the idea around in his brain a bit. “Fine,” he finally answered.

“Yes!” Charlie exclaimed as she hopped off of the swings.

“I have to talk to my mom first, ya know.”

“Of course!”

“So,” Castiel began. By his tone, she could tell it was probably going to be about Jo. “How’re things with you? Any word from Jo?”

“No.” Charlie sat back down on the swing. “I tried to contact her on Christmas. She ignored my texts and phone call. She doesn’t even want to try to work things out. And I’m not going to force her.”

“We’re quite a pair right now, aren’t we?”

Charlie huffed out a single laugh. “You’re tellin me.” A shiver ran through Charlie. “It’s colder than a witches tit out here. Can we go?”

The mist from Castiel’s exhale hung in the air like his impending decision. “I really don’t want to go home,” he finally answered. “I miss him so much, Charlie. Every minute I’m there is a brand new batch of torture. Knowing I’m in the bed he used to share with me. It’s hell.”

“I know the feeling,” Charlie admitted with a doleful smile.

Unfortunately, it was way too cold for them to delay their stay for much longer, so they headed back to the house.

 

>>>>>>

 

For two days, Becky had tried to get out of her son what was wrong. Wanted to ask him where Dean was. Wanted to ask him why the nightmares were back. Yet, every time she was shut down and told to go away. Becky should have known that all she needed to do was call Charlie. The moment they came back into the house with rosy cheeks and matching smiles, she knew whatever happened between Castiel and Dean would eventually get better.

The last thing she expected was what Castiel nearly demanded as soon as he sat down next to her in the kitchen.

“I’m going to Meg’s house for New Year’s,” he stated.

Becky’s eyebrows shot to the ceiling. “Uh-huh… And I’m allowing you to go back to a house you were assaulted at because?”

“Well, for one it’s a closed party. There’s a guest list,” Castiel started.

Becky leaned back in her chair with her arms crossed, her left eyebrow raised. “And?”

“I most certainly won’t be alone the entire night. It’s way too cold at night to even think about being outside when the sun is down,” Castiel supplied.

“Please, Becky! It won’t be like last time. This party is for the pit orchestra, stage crew, and cast. Meg throws it every year. Castiel is part of the cast this year. The two of us will never leave each other’s side the entire night. I swear.” Charlie bowed her head. “I won’t have Jo with me anymore, so…”

Becky held out her hand for Charlie to hold as a way to comfort the teen. “I’m so sorry, sweetie. She’ll come around eventually just give it time.”

Charlie nodded. “I hope you’re right. I miss her.”

“You two have been an item long before you started dating, so don’t worry. She’ll change her mind,” Becky said with a hopeful smile.

“Maybe, but until then, I need my bestie with me on New Year’s Eve. I’ve never been to the party because of this one over here.” Charlie hooked her thumb at Castiel. “For once, he wants to go with me.”

“I don’t know, red. Sounds like way too much fun for my little bro,” Gabriel jested as he walked into the kitchen.

“I can have fun! I just went to Dean’s…” Castiel’s argument disappeared when he mentioned Dean’s name. “I need this party, Mom. Please. I’ll have Meg send you the guest list and everything, so you know who is going to be there.”

Becky was obviously far from okay with the idea of her son once again being put in a position of getting hurt. “Does Ellen know about this party?”

“Yes,” Castiel and Charlie said in unison.

“So, she can confirm everyone who is going to be on the guest list.”

“Yes,” they once again replied in unison.

 _I’m going to regret this in some way._ “Fine.”

“Yes!” Charlie hooted.

“I’m gonna have to talk to Ellen first to confirm the guest list. Should I even bother asking if Rodney or Harriet will be home?”

“No,” Castiel answered. “I promise to be on my best behavior.”

“I’m not worried about you, Castiel. I’m worried about other people. Not you either, Charlie. I know I can trust you. Meg… questionable trust and morals.”

“She’d eat the livers of Castiel’s enemies,” Gabriel interjected with a smirk.

“Eww,” Charlie muttered.

Gabriel threw his arms up. “Tell me I’m wrong,”

Castiel shrugged. “She wouldn’t eat them. Probably just filet them for fun.”

 _That makes me feel so much better,_ Becky thought as she rolled her eyes.

 

>>>>>>

 

Everyone was trying their absolute best to make Castiel feel better, but nothing could make the pain he was feeling go away. Everyone, even Sam who he didn’t say a word to, was telling him what happened wasn’t his fault. All he needed to do was give Dean a bit of time, and things would go back to normal. Still, no matter how many people told him it wasn’t his fault, most of his time was spent chastising himself. _How on earth could you have let yourself love him? Why did you almost tell him you did? You warned yourself. You were informed about him. Why did he pursue me just to hurt me like this?_

By Sunday, Castiel had given up all hope of things ever turning around. There were no calls. No texts. Nothing but silence. _Maybe I wasn't what he wanted after all._

As stupid as it made him feel, he still missed Dean. He had been trying everything to get Dean out of his mind and out of his space. Nothing he did truly help. He tried to rearrange his room. Changed his sheets. He even opened his windows in freezing temperature to air out the room. _All of my senses are flooded by him. It has to stop somewhere, right?_

Considering how little time had passed, his mom even told him he was being silly. “There is no way Dean isn’t coming back, hun. I’m sorry you feel otherwise, but he just needs a bit of time.”

“No. I need to do this. ‘Cause what if he doesn’t come back?”

“He will.”

However, due to his continued need to wipe his room clean of everything Dean, he begged his mom later that day to take him to Walmart to buy new pillows. “They smell like him! I can’t sleep,” he whined as they walked through the store.

“I just don’t understand why you need them now. It’s New Year’s Eve, Castiel. Shouldn’t you be preparing for the party you’re going to tonight?” Becky asked.

He merely stared daggers at his mother until she threw her hands up in defeat.

“Fine, but I’m buying some much-needed items while I’m here.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously,” she barked back. “For one, your father is watching Hannah, and I have the time to run the errand. Secondly, we need eggs, milk, bread, paper towels. The house doesn't just magically grow stuff we need, Castiel.”

“Ugh,” he groaned. “Fine.”

After he picked out a couple of pillows, Becky dragged him all around the store in search of the items she had listed.

While Becky was busy looking at the tomato sauce, Castiel meandered into the refrigerator section. As he was about to turn into the next aisle, he saw Dean, and he was not alone. He quickly and as silently as possible pulled his cart back to remain somewhat hidden and watched. The words they exchanged were silenced by the whirring of the refrigerators. _What the hell are they talking about? Why does Dean look like that?_

His mind was filled with questions until Dean wrapped his arms around the girl with chestnut skin and curly brown hair to hold her in an intimate embrace. Castiel’s heart fell to the pit of his stomach as he watched Dean add insult to Castiel’s injured heart by placing a kiss on the mystery girl's forehead. Without another word exchanged, they broke apart, looked at each other affectionately, then left the aisle with their arms wrapped around each other. _That was fucking fast! Nice to know I’m so easy to forget._

Castiel walked back to where he knew he would find his mom. “Are you almost done? I’d like to leave.”

“Yes. Just, _Barilla_ or _Ragu_?”

“Neither. Do they have _Classico_?”

Once the sauce and pasta were found, they headed to check-out. Castiel went first with his pillows. His mom offered to buy it, but he merely grimaced until she once again gave up. She obviously was learning to chose her battles when it came to Castiel’s mood swings.

As he was putting the receipt away, he felt eyes on him. _It has to be him._ Sure enough, Dean had spotted him and was ambling towards him. He leveled Dean with a stare that spoke of his heartbreak and anger.

“Cas!” Dean said almost as if he knew what Castiel was thinking.

However, as soon as the milk chocolate beauty stepped up beside Dean, she linked her arm with Dean’s.

“Whoa, is that Cas?” The girl asked.

 _He even told her about me?_ Castiel’s heart shattered into dust as his eyes began to fill with tears.

“Castiel, sweetie, are you okay?” Becky asked.

Before he had a chance to answer, his feet were carrying him towards the car. His mom close behind him with the cart.

_Tonight, I am imbibing in copious amounts of alcohol. Never been one to drink, but tonight seems like the best time to start._

 

>>>>>>

 

A week without Cas, was a week of complete hell. He missed everything about him. The way his nose scrunched up when he had to wake up before he was ready to on his own. His gummy smiles when Dean said something insanely stupid. The strange text messages during the random moments they found themselves apart. Most of all, he missed waking up with Cas.

Sleep had been escaping his grasp for days. _I can only imagine what sort of hell Cas must be going through._ He had been surviving off of caffeine and power naps since they broke up. He could hardly function. Most of the time he was either drifting from place to place in a daze or snapping at someone for some minute stupid reason. Bobby had to send him home on Thursday due to his being a hazard to everyone’s physical and mental well being. _Fuck everyone._

Of course, Dean knew he was the reason for them being apart. One phone call, just one, and he could have Cas back. He could drive to Cas’ house, kiss him and hug him, then all would be right in the world, but he was a stubborn ass.

The last thing Dean wanted to do was celebrate another year, especially without Cas, but Benny and Jo, mostly Jo, insisted that he get his ass out of the house. Apparently, Sam had other plans for New Year’s, so that meant his fall back, and his standard excuse, was no longer available to get him out of it. Which, of course, was why at six o’clock on New Year’s Eve, Dean found himself at the Islandia Walmart buying party food for Benny.

“Look, Benny, I don’t see anything around here that even closely resembles what you’re talking about. Plus, I don’t know anyone who even likes what you’re talking about, so…”

“Dean?”

Dean turned around and was met with the last person he expected to see. “No fucking way.”

“ _No fucking way, what? I’m telling you it’s a pastry, not Bengay,_ ” Benny explained.

Dean shook his head at the phone. “Look, man, I’m gonna have to call you back,” he replied, then ended the call. He looked at the beautiful woman in front of him and smiled. _Here goes nothing…_ “Cassie! It’s been forever!” He gave her a big hug and looked her over. _She looks phenomenal._  “How have you been?”

Cassie was glowing. New York City had obviously been treating her well. “Great! I’m at NYU, which you already knew, and I’m majoring in English with a journalism minor.”

 _Of course, she’s doing awesome, and I’m a giant bag of douches._ “Fantastic! How are your parents?” he asked reciprocating her sweet smile.

“They’re great. You know them. Disgustingly in love. Even after all the years, they’ve been married,” she said with a laugh. “So, how have you been? How are Bobby and Sam?”

Dean could feel his expression change. “They’re both doing well. Sammy is massive now. I’m awesome,” he lied while giving her a half-hearted chuckle.

Cassie raised an eyebrow at Dean, then gave him a once-over. “Uh-huh… You know I don’t believe the ‘I’m awesome’ for a second right? Things may not have been all peaches and cream for us at the end, but I still know you well enough to see when you’re lying to yourself.”

“Look, it’s nothing — just something I gotta work through on my own. Plus, it’s a long story,” Dean added, running his left hand through his hair.

Cassie leaned back against one of the refrigerator section doors and crossed her arms. “Trust me. I got time.” She motioned her hand for him to carry on.

Dean rolled his eyes, then started to tell her an edited tale of what had happened since September. He stopped when he saw her give him a shit-eating grin “What’s with the face?”

Cassie’s shoulders began to shake with a giggle. “While as I live and breathe, Dean Winchester, you like him. Like I mean really like him. Maybe even lo...”

Dean held up his hand to stop her. “Don’t you dare fucking say it!”

“Look, I know there were a lot of reasons why we broke up, but the main one was I couldn’t accept you for you. You came out to me and I... I could have handled it better. This guy, he knows all of you and wants nothing more than to be with you. You just told me that he almost told you he loves you. Is that what the problem is?” Cassie asked raising her eyebrows at him.

“I don’t know. I don’t think so. Cassie, he’s too good for me. You don’t even know the half of it. I just know that I’ll eventually fuck everything up, just like I did with… well, with you.”

Cassie stepped away from the refrigerator and walked over to Dean so she could get him to look at her. When he finally did, she said, “It takes two to tango. I know how much you cared about me. You cared enough about me to be honest, and I know how hard that is for you. Back then, I couldn’t understand what you were telling me or at least I didn’t want to. When you broke up with me, it hurt, yeah, but I knew it was for the best. What you’re doing right now, running away, it’s not the right course of action. This road with… you said his name was Cas, right?”

Dean nodded.

“Well, it’s not going to be easy. Love hurts. You just need to accept that you love him and figure out where you want to go from there. You do love him, right?”

Dean felt tears well in his eyes as he once again nodded yes.

“Then, stop being a dumbass and fix this! Now, hug me.”

Dean gave her a big hug. “I’ve missed you, Cassie. Thank you.” He kissed her on the forehead, then looked down at her affectionately when they broke apart. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder as she hugged his waist.

“I’ve missed you, too.”

It was nice being around Cassie again. Of course, he could never forgive her for how she reacted to him coming out to her, but she always understood him without trying, and he needed that right now.

They walked around a bit longer. Most of it was spent catching up on what was going on in their lives. Cassie revealed she was in a relationship with a guy named Victor who was pre-law. They met their first year during freshman orientation. Also, she was in a sorority, so Dean spent a few minutes begging her to confirm pillow fight stories. Instead, she rolled her eyes and went off on another subject.

When they were both done shopping, they headed towards checkout, arms linked with huge smiles on their faces.

“You know, I forgot how much I loved being around you, Dean,” she chuckled as she went into her purse for her wallet.

He smiled back. “You’re not too bad yourself.”

“Cas is a lucky guy.”

Dean shrugged. “Yeah, right now I don’t think he…” He paused as he caught sight of the dark brown hair of the man he would and could never forget. “Excuse me for a second.” He walked past Cassie while she paid, then stood in front of the self-checkout area.

Seeing Cas again lifted a weight off of Dean’s chest and made it easier to breathe again. At least that’s how he felt until Cas looked up at him.

After Cas was done putting the receipt in his wallet, he looked at Dean with a level of disgust and hatred he never thought was imaginable. The vivid electric blue of his eyes was tarnished by the betrayal Dean knew he hadn’t committed.

 _Oh, shit! No… No… Cas!_ “Cas!”

Cas’ gaze fell upon Cassie who had once again linked her arm with his.

“Wanna hit the buffet while we’re in the plaza? Catch up a bit more?” Cassie asked. She must have noticed Dean’s attention was elsewhere. He knew when she noticed Castiel’s icy glare because she gasped, then asked louder than necessary, “Whoa, is that Cas?”

Dean could only nod as he watched Castiel’s eyes brim with tears. Cas spared one final grimace at the both of them, then stomped off with who he now realized was Becky in tow.

“So, I’ll take it that was Cas. He’s cute,” Cassie said.

“Yeah, that was Cas. Unfortunately, I think things just went from horrible to catastrophic.”

 

>>>>>>

 

“I’m sorry, Castiel, but how do you even know he was there ‘with’ her as you keep saying?” Charlie asked while making the quotation marks just like Castiel had.

Castiel’s voice had gone hoarse from the amount of crying he had been doing since he had gotten home from Walmart. “Their arms were linked, and he kissed her.”

“Again, it was on the forehead, and we’ve linked arms like that, and there is no way anyone could ever confuse us as ‘with’ each other,” she said as she once again mocked Castiel’s earlier movements.

“Stop! This is serious!”

“Have you asked Sam if Dean is seeing someone new?” Charlie inquired.

Castiel shook his head. “Why would Sam know anyway? It’s not like Dean tells him everything.”

“Well, considering today is probably the first day Dean has been out all week for anything besides work would clue me in that Sam doesn’t have to say a word to Dean to know what he’s been up to.”

“How do you know?”

Charlie rolled her eyes. “‘Cause I asked, Castiel. Dean is as much of a wreck as you are and the two of you are too fucking blind and thick headed to pick up the phone and call one another. It’s annoying as all fuck waiting for you two to get together. You obviously love each other. You obviously have the kind of chemistry people spend their lives searching for. Just stop being stupid and call him!”

Castiel put his hands on his hips. “Well, look who's talking?”

Charlie smacked her thighs and faced away from Castiel. “I can’t fucking win.” She spun towards him. “CALL HIM! Before you do something stupid, Castiel.”

“No. He’s the one who screwed up. He’s the one who calls me first.”

 

>>>>>>

 

“I don’t know what to do, Sammy. For all I know, he thinks I’m sleeping with Cassie,” Dean said, his head in hands.

“Are you?”

Dean gave Sam a bitch face in response.

“Just asking,” Sam said, his hands up in defense. “Well, then you have to call him. You’re probably right. He probably is thinking you are sleeping with her, considering your history he’s not wrong for thinking that way.”

“I have never cheated on anyone!”

It was Sam’s turn to make a bitch face.

“Rhonda doesn’t count. She asked me to fuck him. Plus, she was there with a str…”

“PLEASE, DEAR GOD IN HEAVEN!!!!!” Sam shrieked.

Dean just chuckled.

“Call him,” Sam begged, handing Dean his phone. “He’s probably waiting for your call after today anyway.

“Charlie told you Cas is going to be at the party later, right?”

“So, you’re going to show up at a party you weren’t invited to and what? Cause a scene?”

 _He’s got a point._ “I’ll call him tomorrow, then. New year. New slate.”

“I don’t know, Dean. I think you sho…”

“I gotta think about what I want to say. I’ll call him tomorrow.”

Sam looked at the clock on his cell phone. “I should probably get ready. I have to be at the party by ten.”

Dean’s eyes widened in astonishment. “Dude, it’s only like 7:30. What the hell do you need to get ready for right fucking now?”

Sam rolled his eyes. “I wanna look good. Is that a crime?”

“Oh, so you gotta shave your legs? Pluck a bit? Put on some rouge?”

Sam punched Dean in the arm. “Fuck you! I’m not the one who owns pink and purple satin panties, dick.”

Dean glared at Sam. “You’re not supposed to know about those!” he growled as he pointed a stern finger at Sam.

“Which pair the pink or the purple ones?”

Dean chased him down the hall until Sam was locked behind the bathroom door. “Bitch.”

“Jerk,” Sam laughed.


	44. Chapter Forty-Four

The fact that Dean still hadn’t called after what happened at Walmart by the time Castiel left for the party was further proof for Castiel that Dean was involved with someone new.

Unlike the last party, Castiel and Charlie decided to be there earlier rather than later. They arrived at around nine. By that point, hardly anyone was there, and Meg was reasonably sober.

“Clarence! Charlie!” She exclaimed when she greeted them at the door. “I’m so happy you’re here!”

“I told you we would be. Did you not believe me?” Castiel asked.

Meg shrugged. “You never know, especially when it comes to you.”

Charlie pushed through the door. “Who’s here?”

“Not Jo, if that’s what you're asking. She’s hanging out with Dean tonight, apparently,”  Meg answered. “Fuck ‘em! You’re gonna have a blast without them!”

Castiel cleared his throat. “Um… Meg?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I have a drink?” he asked sheepishly.

Both Charlie and Meg’s jaws dropped.

“You want a drink?” Meg inquired, barely keeping the shock out of her voice.

Castiel nodded his head vigorously. “Something strong, please.”

“Well, I make a mean Long Island Iced Tea. You won’t even know you’re drinking six different types of alcohol,” Meg bragged.

Charlie held up her hand. “I’ll take one, too.”

“Guess I’m making a shit ton, then,” Meg chuckled.

After watching Meg make a huge container of the “iced tea,” Castiel and Charlie took their first sips.

“This doesn’t taste like alcohol,” Castiel said as he took another sip.

Meg’s face split into a Cheshire cat grin. “That’s what makes them dangerous. Pace yourselves.”

Guest started to trickle in little by little. By ten, Castiel was a bit more than buzzed and laughing up a storm with Meg and Charlie on the couch over something insignificant.

“Hey, guys,” Sam greeted as he entered the living room.

“Sam!” Castiel shot up onto his feet and staggered over to Sam. He nearly tripped on nothing as he made his short journey to Sam.

“Hey, are you okay?” Sam inquired.

Castiel waved Sam off. “Pfft. I’m fine.”

“Are you...drunk?” Sam questioned.

“No,” he groaned as he took another sip of his drink which inevitably spilled all over him. “Yes,” he conceded with a pout.

“What the hell happened to you?” Sam said holding Castiel’s shoulder trying to keep him steady.

He knocked Sam’s hand off his shoulder.

“He discovered Long Island Iced Tea,” Meg answered for Castiel.

Sam’s eyebrows furrowed. “And?”

“I drank it! You got a problem with that?” Castiel growled as he went to take another drink of the “iced tea.”

“Why don’t you slow down before you get sick?” Sam suggested.

Castiel stomped over to the couch and plopped down next to Meg again.

“You know he’s right, right? You need to pace yourself. That stuff is strong as shit,” Meg added.

Castiel huffed and put his drink on the table. “Fine.”  _ Party poopers. _

 

>>>>>>

 

Watching Jo try to flirt with Garth was pathetic. Dean knew like everyone else in that room Jo wanted to be elsewhere, but she was just as stubborn as Dean was so instead she was creeping the fuck out of Garth.

Dean had just finished his first beer when his phone started to vibrate.

It was a text from Sam.

**Sam: You broke him.**

_ I broke him?  _ It took him a second to realize who him was.  _ Cas… _

**Dean: Is he okay?! What’s wrong?!?!**

Dean’s heart was beating a million miles a minute.  _ Is he okay? Oh, God. What if he’s hurt? What if… _ His phone vibrating signaled another text.

**Sam: He’s drunk. The next thing you know he’s gonna be joining Meg outside for a joint.**

**Sam: You broke him. You fix him.**

_ Cas doesn’t drink… And smoke? What the fuck? _

“Dean?” Jo asked.

“Yeah?”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah. At first, I didn’t think it was, but now I don’t know,” Dean admitted.

Jo’s eyebrows furrowed. “What does that mean?”

“Cas is drunk.”

Jo’s eyes widened in shock, then narrowed before she smacked his bicep. “What the fuck did you do, asshole?”

“Ouch! What the fuck did you hit me for? I didn’t do anything!” Dean snapped.

Benny stepped away from Andrea, his girlfriend's, side to have a word with Jo. “Look, chére, I have no problem with you drinking my liquor, but there will be no drunken violence in my place.”

Jo crossed her arms over her chest. “Tell him to tell me what he did to Cas, and I won’t hit him again.”

Benny’s face screwed up in bemusement. “Didn’t Cas break up with him?”

“Castiel Shurley does not drink, Dean,” Jo barked. “He once told me the reason he doesn’t drink is that drunks are unscrupulous cowards who hide from reality with a bottle rather than facing it. You had to do something pretty horrible for him to throw his principals out the window.”

“Is this about you running into Cassie at the Walmart, brotha?” Benny asked.

“Alright, I’ve had enough of this crap,” Garth snapped from the couch. “I have been dealing with nothing but drama since Saturday, and I am sick of it! It is seriously harshing my mellow!”

Everyone turned and stared at Garth like he had two heads. He never freaked out about anything and quite frankly him losing it was out of character for him.

“Whoa, someone poked a bear for too long,” Pam jested.

“No! Shut the fuck up, Pam. You started this, and I’m finishing it. Jo, no I am not interested, and neither are you so leave me alone, please!”

Jo bowed her head in embarrassment. “I’m sorry, Garth. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. I just.. I…”

“Miss Charlie. We get it, but you’re not the only one I’m pissed at.” Garth turned his icy glare at Dean. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

Garth’s level of contempt bewildered Dean. “I didn’t do anything? Cas broke up with me, remember? Not the other way around.”

“Oh, but I’m sure you had a major hand in him doing it. Plus, you’ve just been  **such** a pleasure to be around since the two of you split, too,” Garth snarked. “So, obviously, you’re running, which makes you a serious dumbass, Dean. I’m sorry I can’t hold it in anymore. I’ve been asking myself two questions all night. One is why won’t Jo leave me alone. The other is why are you here, Dean?”

“We had plans, man. Plans that had been set long before Cas and I got serious,” Dean defended.

Garth chuckled humorlessly. “You’ve been serious since the moment you met him, and you know it. Seeing you two together…” Garth shook his head in exasperation. He narrowed his eyes at Dean as he started walking closer to him. “I’ve known you for almost six years, Dean. In that amount of time, I have seen you date or screw person after person. I was there during Cassie, Lisa, Ketch, Rhonda, Cole…”

Dean waved his hands back and forth to get Garth to stop. “Whoa, we get it. What’s your point?”

“My point is except for  **maybe** Cassie you have never been Dean with any of them. At least not the Dean I know. You’ve been this fake showy dick who puts on a facade. When I saw you with Cas last week...” A smile spread across Garth’s face. “It was nice to see the Dean I know and love. Not some cheap imitation of Dean. You were fucking happy, Dean. So, I’ll ask my two questions, again. What the hell is wrong with you and why are you here when you should be with the guy you clearly friggin’ love?!?!”

Dean was speechless. If he were honest, Garth made a considerable point. Why the hell was he there instead of with Cas? Midnight New Years Eve kisses supposedly mean a lot, right?  _ Screw waiting until tomorrow.  _ Dean found the bowl holding his keys, then walked out the door without saying a word to any of them.  _ I’m not going to explain myself. I have a thirty-minute drive ahead of me and forty-five minutes until midnight. Fuck I hope there’s no traffic. If I hit traffic, I’m fucked. _

When he finally reached the car, Jo came hollering after him, “Wait! I’m coming with you!!!!”

“Hurry up, then. Run, Jo! Run!” Dean jested.

Once she was at the car, out of breath, she said, “Screw you, Winchester. Now, let’s go. I have a woman to kiss at midnight.”

_ Don’t have to tell me twice,  _  Dean thought with a smile.

 

>>>>>>

 

Even after Sam told Castiel to stop drinking, Cas still found a way to get a little alcohol in him. All of it hand delivered by his newest best friend of the evening.

“You’re funny when you’re drunk,” Max said with a laugh.

“Pfft,” Castiel said with a wave of his hand. “I’m always funny. You just haven’t spent enough time with me.”

Max cocked an eyebrow at Castiel with a knowing smile. “Not like I haven’t tried. You never gave me the time of day.”

“Well, maybe I should have given a nice guy like you the time. Instead, I chose a pretty narcissistic pessimist,” Castiel said as he gulped the remainder of his drink. He turned the cup upside down, then pouted. “All gone.”

“You should probably cool down for a bit. How many have you had?” Max asked.

Cas held up his hands and swayed as he looked at them. He held up eight fingers and chuckled. “This many,” he snickered. “They’re yummy.”

Max shook his head with a grin. “I’m gonna see if I can find you some water.”

Even though his brain was fuzzy, Castiel still knew what Max was expecting from this little interaction. He knew anything that happened would be wrong on more than one level, but for once he wasn’t weighted down by guilt…  _ What do they say you lose when you’re drunk? Inebriation? No, that’s what I am. Inhabitants? What?  _ He giggled at his internal monologue.

As he waited for Max to return, Castiel took a minute to survey his surroundings. Many of the faces were familiar. Most of them were new. Considering he had been out of the music department… well, at least the theater part of the music department for a few years at that point, it wasn't hard to believe that most of the faces were unrecognizable. Plus, he was pretty intoxicated.

Having the moment alone, unfortunately, began to sour Castiel’s mood. He started to think about everything Dean ruined by running. Yeah, Castiel wasn’t innocent. He was the one who pulled the plug on the entire relationship. He told Dean he was done, but they both knew he didn’t mean it. They were only on a break. Now, it seemed as if it were more than a just break and more of a breakup.

Knowing that irritated Castiel even more than he already had been. Did Dean even realize what he was losing? Did he even care? Did this mean Castiel’s plans were now ruined? So much was dependent on the two of them being together. Him being in the musical was only part of it. What about getting to school?  _ Does this mean I can finally get my car? _

“Whoa, someone is thinking way too hard at a party. What’s on your mind, handsome?” Max asked as he handed Castiel a glass of water.

“My ex,” Cas grumbled. “The fucker ruined everything.”

“Do you mind me asking what happened?”

Castiel downed the entire glass of water. When he was done, he made a satisfied “Ah” before he answered with, “It is not of import. Can we talk about something else?”

“Well, no offense, Castiel, it must be of ‘import’ if you are so upset by it,” Max rebutted. “Now, what happened? Did he hurt you?” Max growled as he asked the final question.

“In a manner of speaking, yes, he hurt me, but not physically. Dean would never do that,” Castiel said, then slapped both hands over his mouth.

Max’s eyes widened to the point that Castiel thought they were going to pop out of his skull.

“Oh, shit! Please, Max, please, do not tell anyone about Dean and me,” Castiel blurted.  “I may be angry with him, but he could lose everything if people found out about us.”

“I won’t say anything, but it does explain a lot. Number one, it explains the close to homicidal looks he has been giving me in the hallway.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “He was always jealous. It drove me nuts. I don’t cheat.”

Max chuckled. “I didn’t mean to make him jealous. I can’t help myself around you. You’re hot as fuck, ya know?”

Castiel couldn’t help but laugh at Max’s statement. “Well, thanks. You may have said it a few times.”

Max shrugged. “You should be told as often as possible.”

“You know, you’re very attractive as well,” Cas admitted.

“MIDNIGHT IS HAPPENING IN FIVE MINUTES, PEOPLE!!!!” Meg shouted from the porch where she had just taken a smoke break. “BE READY!!!!”

Castiel turned towards Max. “I thought tonight would be different.”

“How so?” Max asked.

“Well, for one, my best friend said she would be my side all night, but I haven’t seen her since Gilda showed up. Plus, where the hell did Sam go?”

A dejected expression marred Max’s face. “I’m sorry I’m not who you wanted to spend time with tonight.”

“Don’t be sorry, Max. You have been more than welcomed company. I needed this. I need what you gave me tonight. I just…” Tears started to fall gently down his cheeks. He wiped them away with frustration.  _ Am I a fucking weepy drunk? Great… _

Max shook his head. “Geez… Can I glare at Dean now when I see him? ‘Cause no one should be upset on New Year’s Eve, gorgeous.”

Castiel chuckled. “Seriously, Max? I’ve been single for a week. Tone it down a bit.”

Out of nowhere, Max leaned in and placed a kiss on Castiel’s cheek. “I’ve liked you since I was in the sixth grade,” he said with a shrug. “Can’t blame a guy for trying.”

Castiel placed his hand over the spot that Max kissed, then shook his head vigorously. “I love Dean, Max. I can’t even think about… Dean? What are you doing here?”

“ONE MINUTE TO MIDNIGHT!” Meg announced seconds before Dean’s fist collided into Max’s face. “OH, SHIT!”


	45. Chapter Forty-Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry that I am posting this chapter a day late. I thought yesterday was Tuesday. I hope you enjoy the chapter!

_ Shit can never go my way, can it? Why the hell are people on the road right now? _

Most of the drive to Meg's house, Dean wished he could move drivers off the road by only thinking it. The other part was spent stressing over how long it was taking to get to Cas. Luckily, there was just mild traffic on the Sagtikos Parkway. Southern State Parkway, however, was the one that was a bitch, but that was nothing new.  _ That fucker is always a pain in my ass. _

Jo spent a majority of the trip yapping his ear off about what she planned on doing. Several times he almost snapped at her, but his mind sounded a lot like she did at the moment, so he kept his mouth shut.

When they reached the house, Jo ran out of the car when it reached a low enough speed without letting Dean find a parking spot. He was going to yell at her, but he knew if he were in her position he would have done the same thing.  _ Nothing is keeping me from Cas right now. _

After Dean finally found a spot, he ran to the front door. As soon as he entered, his senses were pummeled with marijuana, cigarettes, and alcohol.  _ Someone didn’t care about house rules… Not that Meg probably even cares right now. _

Dean searched the front of the house. He went through the kitchen and dining room, receiving strange looks and a few curious whispers as he sought through the rooms.  _ Yes, I taught at your school for a minute. Get over it. _

When he couldn't find Castiel in either, Dean started to drift into the rest of the house. It wasn’t overly crowded, which was helpful, but the lighting and the music made it hard to find anything let alone think.

Dean spun around when he was tapped on the shoulder. His heart was about to burst with joy until he turned around and saw it was only Jo. “Have you found anyone yet?” she asked.

Dean shook his head. “Not yet. I’m assuming you haven’t found anyone?”

“No. I found a stunned Sam. He was chatting up… well not exactly chatting. Did you know Sam knows ASL?”

Dean smirked.  _ That’s my boy. _ “The kids a fucking genius, I don’t doubt it.”

“Well, whatever, she’s pretty and sweet. Hopefully, that means his tastes have improved. ‘Cause Ruby…” she trailed off as her face scrunched up with disgust. “Just ew.”

From the other room, Dean heard the back door slide open. “MIDNIGHT IS HAPPENING IN FIVE MINUTES, PEOPLE!!!! BE READY!!!!”

Jo laughed. “Meg is at her favorite level of drunk and high I guess.” She looked up and down the hallway. “I haven’t checked the balcony upstairs or the den yet. How about you take the den, and I check upstairs?”

Dean nodded. “Good luck.”

Of course, Dean walked in on people fucking in the den. There was no way that wasn’t going to happen at a high school party. From what he could see it was two chicks.  _ Nice, _ he giggled.

As soon as Dean was about to make his way upstairs, he heard his name down the hall.

“...Dean now when I see him? ‘Cause no one should be upset on New Year’s Eve, gorgeous.”

He made his way towards the sound and found Cas and Max standing closely together.

A low kindling flame of jealousy began to burn low in Dean’s gut.  _  He’s mine… well… _

Castiel chuckled. “Seriously, Max? I’ve been single for a week. Tone it down a bit.”

_ Exactly! _

Then, Max kissed him. Leaned in and kissed  **his** Cas!  _ I knew that son of a bitch wanted him! _ All Dean saw was red. The entire room fell into a haze as rage began to boil his blood. Before he realized what he was doing, he was stomping over to where they were sitting together.

Dean had a vague awareness that Cas said something to him, but his green monster had another plan in mind. As his fist was flying in the air, Dean momentarily had a “ _ What the fuck am I doing?”  _ moment, but it was too late. Luckily, his brain caught up with him in enough time to change the power of the punch. Still, Dean knew he was about to fuck up.

“OH, SHIT!” Meg shouted.

Even after Meg’s exclamation, the music was still blasting. It was almost as if either no one noticed or cared that someone was just hit in the face.

“What the hell, Dean? Why did you hit him?” Castiel barked.

“He kissed you!” Dean barked.

“On the cheek, man,” Max interjected.

Dean huffed out his breath. “So what? I knew you wanted him. You couldn’t wait until he was a free man, huh?”

“Dean!” Cas snapped. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“Well, to be honest, right now I don’t know considering you are obviously starting something with Max.”

Cas rolled his eyes as he scoffed. “You’ve got a lot of nerve coming here and punching Max when you were just all over some new girl earlier today at Walmart.”

“It wasn’t like that.”

Cas muttered something under his breath, then asked Max. “Are you okay?”

“I’m gonna go find some ice,” Max replied, then disappeared into the other room.

People started to count down all around them. From there count, Dean only had fifteen seconds to fix everything that had happened within that last forty-five. “I’m sorry, Cas.”

Cas laughed. “I’m not the one you should be saying sorry to, asshole.”

“I told you he wanted you, but you didn’t believe me. You said he couldn’t help it. We break up, and he’s the first guy all over you.”

“You’re one to talk!”

“Cassie and I were just talking! She helped me!”

Cas crossed his arms over his chest. “Helped you how?”

Boisterous screams of Happy New Year started to sound all around them.  _ Fuck this. You fucked up enough tonight. _ “You know what? Nevermind. You’re soon to be boyfriend is probably gonna need some comforting.”

“He’s not my boyfriend or soon to be boyfriend. I told him no! And you still haven’t answered my question. How did Cassie help you?”

Dean hoped beyond all hope that the darkness of the house would hide his blush. “She helped me figure something out is all.”

“Figure what out? That you never wanted me? That you’re still more interested in fucking around? Because you not calling me after what I witnessed kinda…”

“I fucking love you, okay?” Dean blurted out in frustration. Any color that was once in his cheeks quickly disappeared.  _ Run…  _ Which, of course, he did.

 

>>>>>>

 

The first thought that crossed Castiel’s mind was,  _ Dean loves me?  _ Shortly followed by,  _ Where is he going? _

Castiel followed briskly after Dean, trying to match his pace.  _ Why the hell is he running away from me?  _ He tried calling out to him, but Dean couldn’t hear him. If he were honest, Castiel could hardly hear himself screaming out to Dean.

When both of them were outside Castiel decided to call out to him again. “Dean! Wait!”

“I shouldn’t have come,” Dean grunted as he continued to stomp off towards the Impala.

“Stop running! Wait!” Castiel hollered.

Finally, Dean stopped and turned towards Castiel. “Why? So I can screw something else up? So I can make your life miserable? I’m no good for you, Cas! Me punching Max in the face is proof enough. So, why the fuck do you want me to stay here?!”

The question had a simple answer. “Because I love you, too, you idiot!”

Dean’s expression was blank for about two seconds before a smile split across his face. “You just went completely  _ Gilmore Girls  _ on me, didn’t you?”

Castiel chuckled. “Blame Charlie.”

Dean shook his head with a grin. “I’ll be thanking her.” Within a couple of steps, Dean was in Castiel’s space, grabbing both sides of his face and kissing him.

The kiss swept him off of his feet and made him feel as if he were floating. Castiel wasn’t sure if it was the liquor that was still in his system or just the feeling of having Dean in his arms again, but he might as well have been on the moon.

When they separated, Dean let out a small laugh.

“What’s so funny?” Castiel inquired.

A sweet smile painted Dean’s face. “I am an idiot.”

“I’m not going to disagree if that’s what you’re looking for,” Castiel said with a smirk.

Dean playfully punched Cas in the arm. “I mean I’m an idiot for ever letting you leave my car on Christmas Eve. I should have followed you. I should have sat there and listened to those records. I should have kissed you until we couldn’t breathe. I’m an idiot. Please, forgive me, Cas.”

Castiel shook his head with a silly grin on his face. “I think the whole me coming out into the freezing cold without a jacket to tell you I love you, too, was my way of saying I forgive your dumbass.”

Dean placed a peck on Castiel’s lips. “But I’m your dumbass.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Yes, you’re my dumbass.”

“Good,” Dean replied, then placed a lingering kiss on Castiel’s lips. “Let’s get you inside. You’re freezing.”

“Say it again. One more time before we go inside,” Castiel requested.

“I’m a dumbass?”

“No, the other part.”

“Um… I’m an idiot?”

Castiel huffed out a breath in exasperation. “You know what I am asking for, Dean. Don’t be deliberately obtuse.”

Dean’s eyes twinkled in the night as he beamed at Castiel. “I love you, Castiel Shurley. Now, let’s go inside before you start losing appendages due to frostbite.”

Castiel bit his bottom lip. “Maybe I don’t want to go inside. Maybe I have other ideas in mind. Ideas that involve a certain vehicle’s backseat.”

Without a second thought, Dean grabbed both of Castiel’s hands and started leading him towards the Impala. “I think that can be arranged,” he said with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle.

A massive smile threatened to split Castiel’s face. “You’re such a dork.”

Unfortunately, plans were cut short by the entrance of a crying Jo. “Charlie slept with someone else. Take me home!”

 

>>>>>>

 

The sound of the den door creaking open then closing only momentarily delayed the inevitable. Charlie was ready to explode. Gilda had been teasing her for what felt like hours even though she knew it was probably only fifteen minutes.

Of course, Charlie knew she was jumping into the saddle with someone new way too fast, but she couldn’t control her actions as well as she usually could. Something about the iced tea she had been drowning in all night caused her to forget what she was so upset about, to begin with. Gilda’s begging brown eyes didn’t help either.

Just as she was about to climax, the den door opened again. This time, to her absolute horror, it was Jo.  _ Fuck!  _ “Jo?!”

Tears started to stream down Jo’s beautiful face. “Oh, my God, Charlie! How could you?”

Thankfully, Gilda had stopped her ministrations between Charlie’s thighs and was starting to dress just as quickly as Charlie was. “I didn’t know you two were still an item,” she explained as she put her bra back on.

“We aren’t. Jo broke up with me,” Charlie informed.

“A week ago, Charlie!” Jo shrieked. “A fucking week ago!”

Charlie stopped dressing for a moment to give Jo a dumbfounded expression. “You made your intentions quite clear, Joanna! You wanted nothing to do with me. I tried. I spent all week trying. You’re in the wrong here, not me.”

“You’re proving my point by what fucking happened here tonight. You don’t care about me! You only care about a piece of ass!” Jo shouted and left the room.

“Jo! Stop!” Charlie shouted as she finished zippering her boots. She began to chase after her. “Jo! Come back here! Let’s just talk about this!”

Jo was already outside and near the Impala by the time Charlie exited the front door.

As Charlie approached the scene, Castiel reared his head in Charlie’s direction with a flabbergasted expression.

For a moment, Charlie and Castiel had one of there silent conversations. When Charlie confirmed Castiel’s unspoken question, Castiel closed his eyes and let out a deep breath as he shook his head.

Charlie bowed her head in shame, then turned around to head back into the house.

 

>>>>>>

 

“Jo, I love you, but I have to run back inside. I’ll be right back, okay?” Cas asked as he hugged Jo.

Jo nodded her head. “I’m going to sit in the car.”

Cas then placed a quick peck on Dean’s lips and said, “I’ll be right back, love.”

Dean felt his face flush.  _  I like the sound of that.  _ “Promise?” he whispered.

With one final kiss, Cas replied, “Promise,” then followed after the redhead he previously had not noticed had joined them outside.

The Impala had surprisingly held onto some of the heat that had been radiating inside of it twenty or so minutes prior. When he entered the front seat and turned it on, he adjusted the mirror to take in the sight of Jo before he faced her. “So… um…” he took a deep breath. “I don’t know what to say, Jo, except I’m sorry. For everything.”

Jo wiped away some of her tears. “It’s not your fault that she’s a slut.”

_ Oh, boy… _ Dean took out his cell phone and texted the only person he knew would be the next step in this situation.

**Dean: Hey, Becky. Castiel is okay, but we're gonna need you to come to pick Charlie and Cas up.**

 

>>>>>>

 

There were things, as well as places, Castiel would rather have been at that moment, but his best friend needed him. Honestly, Castiel was on Jo’s side in this situation, but as Charlie cried her eyes out into his shoulder, he couldn't help but hurt right along with her.

“I’m such a moron,” Charlie sobbed.

Without a second guess, Castiel nodded and said, “Yes. You are.”

The statement only made Charlie cry a little harder, but best friends are honest. Regardless of how much something might hurt, he could never lie to her.

“Thanks. That makes me feel so much better,” Charlie grumbled.

Castiel took a step back from Charlie to get a good look at her. “Unfortunately, Charlie, nothing I say is going to make you feel better and I don’t plan on being anything but brutally honest with you. So, if you’re looking for someone who is going to sugarcoat the truth for you, I am not that friend.”

“Can we just go home?” Charlie begged. “I don’t want to be here anymore.”

Castiel sighed. “Well, you have two options at the moment. One, we can go with Dean, Sam, and Jo. Or two, I can call my mom and wait for her to come to pick us up.”

Charlie groaned in annoyance. “Option two please.”

Castiel kissed the top of his best friends head and stepped back outside of the house to call his mom.

She answered on the first ring. “ _ I’m already on my way, sweetie _ .”

Castiel shook his head, then looked down at his phone with a perplexed expression. “Um, why?”

“ _ Dean texted me. Said you and Charlie probably would need a ride. _ ”

Castiel had no words.

“ _ So, you and Dean are together again, huh? I think a bit of me saying, ‘I told you so’ is required in this situation. _ ”

Castiel could hear the smile in her voice. “Haha, Ma. I’ll see you soon.”

Laughter came in through the receiver. “ _ Love you. _ ”

“Love you, too, Ma.”

After informing Charlie of his mom’s estimated arrival time, Castiel took the short stroll over to the Impala.

The smile that greeted him as Dean exited the car lit up the night and broke Castiel’s heart. He wanted to go home with Dean, but his best friend was going to have to come first tonight.

“What’s the word, angel?” Dean asked as he held out his arms to embrace him.

Once he was in Dean’s arms, he didn’t want to leave them. “You should probably take her home.”

Dean kissed him gently on his neck. “Becky’s on her way, right?”

A shiver of pleasure traveled up Castiel’s spine at the feeling of Dean’s lips on his bare neck. “Mmm.”

“She seems happy that I showed up tonight,” Dean said with a smile in his voice.

Castiel chuckled softly. “Yeah, I’ve been an absolute pleasure to be around,” he jested. His words laced with sarcasm. “I wouldn’t leave her alone until everything…” He took a deep breath. “Well, until everything stopped reminding me of you. I rearranged my room. Changed my sheets. Bought new pillows today.”

“I would have never been able to stay away from you, Cas. I was going to call you tomorrow until Garth blew up at me.”

Castiel gently pulled away from Dean to search his expression for the lie Dean was more than likely telling. However, his search merely confirmed Dean’s words. “Garth? Really?”

Dean shrugged. “The guy likes you. What can I say?”

“Huh…” Castiel uttered with a corresponding shrug. “Remind me to hug him the next time I see him. I know how much he enjoys those.”

Dean laughed. “A little too much sometimes. Once, he hugged me for a solid three minutes. I wanted to strangle him by the time that particular hug was over.”

“He loves you,” Castiel said with a small grin.

Dean waved him off. “Yeah, that’s what he said.”

They spent a few moments just beaming at one another. Castiel was the first to break the moment. “You should probably go find Sam.”

Once again Cas found himself in Dean’s arms. “This sucks.”

“I have to go soon and you should, too.”

When Castiel’s mom pulled up, they no longer had a choice. She honked when she saw him.

Dean gave him one more kiss, then whispered, “I love you, Castiel.”

A giant smile covered Castiel’s face. “I love you, too, Dean.”

 

>>>>>>

 

Even though Dean loved Jo like a sister, the last thing he wanted to be doing on New Year’s Eve was driving her home. Of course, he felt for her and tried to help her, but he knew where he belonged, and it wasn’t driving her home.

Sam was just as ecstatic about going home, also. Jo was right. The brunette Sam had been talking to was adorable. Eileen seemed nice. Unfortunately, fifteen seconds of awkward signing between people wasn’t enough time to get to know anyone. However, if the way Sam was looking at her were any indication, that would not be the last time he sees her.

When they reached Jo’s house, both Sam and Dean asked if she wanted either of them to stay. Without hesitation, Jo turned both of them down, but at least they could say they tried. Once Jo was safely in the house, Dean left her driveway and started the short trip home.

“So… Eileen?” Dean asked as he tapped out the drumline to a Metallica song on the radio.

“So… Cas?” Sam replied.

A goofy grin split across his face. “I asked first.”

“I met her at the library first, actually,” Sam said with a smile. “I had no idea she was on stage crew.”

Dean smirked. “Picking up chicks at the library now, are we?”

Sam blushed. “Maybe. I… um… picked up some ASL books just so I could learn how to talk to her,” he admitted.

Dean’s grin widened. “You stud, you,” he jested.

Sam rolled his eyes, then gave Dean a bitch face.

“What?!”

“Nothing,” Sam replied as he shook his head.

Silence filled the car for about twenty seconds until Sam finally asked again, “So… Cas?”

The smile that never left Dean’s face brightened further. “Yeah, Cas and I are back together.”

There was no reply from Sam, so Dean turned his head quickly to gauge Sam's reaction. The last thing he expected to see was heart eyes from his little brother. “Alright, no chick flick moments, man.”

“I’m just proud of you. That’s all,” Sam explained with a small grin.

“Well, cut it out ‘cause you’re creeping me out,” Dean admonished halfheartedly.

When they finally pulled into the driveway, Sam exited the car while Dean stayed. He took out his cell phone and quickly shot out a text to Cas.

**Dean: I wish I were waking up next to you tomorrow. I love you <3**

Of course, Dean knew how much of a girl he was being, but he didn’t care. It’s not like anyone would see it except for the two of them. He wasn’t lying, either. There was no one else he would rather wake up next to than Cas. After the whole ordeal of having to live without him for a week, he planned on proving to Cas every day how lucky he was to have him.

Dean wasn’t expecting a response right away, but he did receive one.

**Cas: Trust me when I say I wish I were waking up next to you tomorrow, as well. As much as I love my best friend, we have some serious making up to do ;)**

**Cas: And I love you, too, Dean.**

A wave of arousal ran hot through Dean’s veins.

**Dean: I’d say let’s try sexting, but that would be more than a little awkward for Charlie.**

**Cas: I would say so. Lmao**

**Cas: Just so you are aware, I would not object to sexting with you.**

Dean’s eyebrows shot up to the ceiling. “Right now?” he asked Cas aloud.  _ Try texting the question, dumbass. _

**Dean: Right now?**

**Cas: Obviously, not right now.**

Even though Dean knew Cas couldn’t see or hear him, he nodded and once again spoke aloud to no one, “Gotcha.”

**Cas: I miss you.**

**Dean: You know I miss you, too. This sucks.**

**Cas: Charlie is going to kill me in a minute. She said the faces I’m making are making her sick.**

**Dean: Tell her I say sorry, but not sorry.**

**Cas: I’m not saying that, Dean.**

Dean could practically hear the eye roll.

**Dean: Well, I’m not entirely sorry.**

**Cas: I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Dean.**

**Dean: Fine.**

**Cas: I love you :***

The same grin Dean had been wearing earlier returned.

**Dean: I love you, too, angel <3**

After getting ready for bed, Dean fell asleep with a smile on his face. No matter what, Cas was going to be all his tomorrow. Everyone else be damned.

 

>>>>>>

 

The buzz Castiel had been feeling wore off around the time his mom picked him up. Charlie, in Castiel’s opinion, was still drunk way into the wee hours of the morning. Try as Castiel might, he could not find it in him to feel bad for Charlie’s mistake. Yeah, she was drunk, but that was no excuse. Castiel was drunk, as well, but he didn’t lose his entire mind. For a moment, he thought he was going to, but in the end, his conscience still took the wheel and kept him from making a fatal mistake.  _ Dean showing up at the exact moment you could have made a mistake didn’t hurt either. _

For four hours, Castiel held Charlie and listened to her cry about the mistake she had made. For four hours, Castiel let Charlie rant about how much of an idiot she was.

By the time it got to five in the morning, Gabriel had come into the room and lost his shit. “Look, Red, I get you made a huge fucking mistake, but some of us have to work in the morning. If I have to hear one more time about the mistake you made I will personally find someone to perform a laryngoscopy on you in the morning. Do I make myself clear?”

Charlie hiccuped, then said, “I’m so sorry, Gabriel. I’m such a dumbass.”

Gabriel rolled his eyes, then sat down on the bed next to Castiel and Charlie. “Look, I’ve made plenty of drunk mistakes. None of which I will be sharing due to the fact I know they will be used against me as blackmail.”

“Your point, Gabriel?” Castiel groaned.

“My point is,” Gabriel continued, “this will pass. Yeah, she’s pissed at you now, but shit will change. Just give it time.”

“Time?” Charlie looked between Castiel and Gabriel. “Time?”

“Yeah, time,” Gabriel reiterated. “That is what I said, right?”

Castiel nodded.

“Time is what got me into this problem in the first place. Everyone said, ‘Give her time.’ Then, she got pissed off because I was giving her fucking time!” Charlie snapped. “Giving her more time seems like the second stupidest idea to come out of anyone tonight. That’s right up there with screwing around with Gilda. What the fuck was I thinking?!”

“You weren’t,” Castiel answered with a shrug.

An incredulous look painted Charlie’s face.

Castiel slapped his thighs. “What, Charlie?”

All he received in response was a glare.

“I have listened to you for hours, and the only conclusion I can come to is you were not, in fact, thinking. You can hate me if you want, but I have no sympathy for you right now,” Castiel finally admitted.

Charlie scoffed. “You’re only being a dick because you got Dean back.”

Castiel shook his head and rolled his eyes. “No. I would have said these things regardless of Dean showing up or not tonight.”

Gabriel’s eyebrows furrowed in bemusement. “Dean’s back in the picture?”

The first smile Castiel had made since earlier split across his face. “Yeah, a little before midnight he showed up to tell me he loves me.”

Gabriel smiled while Charlie made a retching sound. “Good for you, little bro,” Gabriel replied, ignoring Charlie.

“Thanks,” Castiel said with a blush. “I kind of went Rory on him.”

Charlie perked up at that. “Really?”

Castiel nodded. “Really. My exact words were ‘I love you, too, you idiot.’”

Gabriel chuckled while Charlie said, “Awww.”

“He wanted me to thank you for  _ Gilmore Girls _ , by the way. Or rather, he said he would be thanking you for it. I don’t know… he just. He loves me,” Castiel gushed.

Gabriel abruptly stood. “And that’s my cue to leave and try to get a half-hour of sleep before work.”

“Goodnight, Gabriel,” Charlie and Castiel said in unison.

Once Gabriel was gone, Charlie continued to question Castiel about Dean. When he told her about Max being punched in the face, he was surprised at how hard she laughed. Apparently, she now owed Sam some money over what happened.

Sometime around six, Castiel’s yawns started to clue Charlie into the fact that they needed to get at least a little bit of sleep. As sleep finally did take him, Castiel wondered what sort of drama the new year had in store. Considering how crazy his New Year’s Eve had been, he was hoping it would calm down a bit from there.


	46. Chapter Forty-Six

New Year’s Day morning, Dean woke up disappointed. He wasn’t kidding when he said he wanted to wake up with Cas beside him. Waking up alone was heartbreaking. 

When he looked at his phone to see what time it was, he was surprised to see that it was after ten. Even though he loved sleeping in, he hardly ever found himself actually doing it. He hopped out of bed and made his way to the bathroom to take a quick shower.

Once Dean was done taking a shower and fully dressed, he already had a plan in mind. He knew Charlie would be over Castiel’s house, so he planned on surprising the family with some egg sandwiches from the Village Market. Of course, he preferred Strathmore, but they were closed. Thus, the Village Market.

After picking up six bacon and egg sandwiches, plus an  _ Entenmann’s  _ crumb cake, Dean drove over to the Shurley residence ready to take on the day. When he knocked on the door, he was greeted by an exhausted Becky.

“Good morning, Dean. It’s good to see you,” Becky said as she welcomed him inside.

“I should have brought coffee,” Dean apologized as he made his way to the kitchen.

Becky chuckled. “Yeah, Charlie was up until late crying about Jo. I didn’t get much sleep.”

“So, Cas probably wouldn’t be up to waking right now, would he?”

Becky shrugged. “For you? You never know. Why don’t you head on down and see?”

Dean raised an eyebrow as he narrowed his eyes at Becky. “Is this a test?”

“Honestly? No. Go downstairs.”

Dean eyed Becky skeptically. After giving her one more scrutinizing look, Dean placed the bags holding the food on the counter and headed towards the stairs.

“What did you get us?” Becky questioned as she looked into the bag holding the sandwiches.

Dean hesitated at the top step to the downstairs and answered, “Bacon and egg sandwiches.”

From the smile Becky gave Dean, he could tell he had done well. He took that as a sign that he could continue down the steps to see his angel.

When Dean arrived at Cas’ door, he didn’t bother knocking. The room was entirely different. The bed was no longer near the door it was on the opposite side of the wall. Cas’ room basically rotated one hundred eighty degrees. Still, even though the room was different, Cas still slept on the same side of the bed. Charlie was on what Dean now called his side.  _ Chick stole my spot. _ The words may not have been true, but the thought still stung for some odd reason.  _ He loves you both, and they’re not together. Get a grip, you moron. _

Slowly, trying not to make a sound, Dean approached Castiel’s side of the bed. He kneeled down next to his lover's face and gently kissed the tip of his nose.

Cas’ hand swiped at his nose, then went back to quietly snoring.

Dean laughed silently.  _ He’s too cute. _ Once again, he kissed the tip of Cas’ nose.

“Eww, Charlie. Stop!” Cas groaned.

“Not Charlie, Cas,” Dean said with a grin.

Cas’ too blue eyes shot open and smiled at Dean. “You’re here.”

“I’m here.”

In Cas’ sleepy state, the head tilt was even more adorable than Dean remembered. “Why are you here?”

“Because I love you enough to bring you breakfast,” Dean replied, then placed a lingering kiss on Cas’ lips.

“Ugh, take your gross romance out of the room. Some of us are trying to sleep,” Charlie grumbled, then rolled over.

“Morning, Charlie,” Dean responded.

Dean received the bird for his efforts.

“We didn’t fall asleep until six,” Cas supplied in answer to Charlie’s middle finger.

“Get out,” Charlie ordered as she swung a pillow at them.

Cas sat up, then turned to her and said, “We’ll come back with a large glass of water and Advil.”

“And a bacon and egg sandwich,” Dean added.

Charlie waved them off while mumbling “Uh-huh,” then rolled over to get comfortable enough to fall once again asleep.

As soon as they were out of the room, with the door closed behind them, Dean pushed Cas up against the wall and kissed him. He avoided deepening the kiss due to some rancid liquor-fueled morning breath, but he needed the closeness of kissing Cas. He needed the contact. When Dean felt he had made his point, he pulled away and smiled at Cas’ appearance. His eyes were still closed, and his lips were still slightly pursed.

The expression did, of course, quickly soften to one of a content grin. “Well, good morning to you, too, Dean. What was that for?”

Dean shrugged. “I love you.”

Castiel beamed at him. “You really like saying that, don’t you?”

“Honestly, no. I don’t,” Dean admitted.

The look that painted Cas’ face was one Dean never wanted to see again. “I’m sorry yo…”

“NO! Stop! Don’t go there. I love you. It’s just those words… The last person I said them to, freaked out on me when I admitted I was bi. The person before that, my mom, died in a house fire. It’s not that I don’t love you. I just don’t trust the words not to bring me heartache of some sort.”

Cas nodded in understanding, then placed a sweet kiss on Dean’s lips. “I love every part of you. I love the passionate musician and the closet nerd. I love your mind, your humor, your ability to bring out the best in me. I don’t care that your bi. I only care that your mine. Are you mine?”

Dean nodded.

“Then, you never have anything to worry about. Plus, I don’t plan on dying any time soon. So, you’re stuck with me,” Cas said with a shrug.

“You’re not allowed to die,” Dean demanded. “No dying permitted. Ever.”

Cas rolled his eyes. “I’m not immortal. Eventually, I will die, Dean. There’s no stopping that.”

“Well, no dying while I’m around. It’s not allowed. Got it?”

Cas chuckled as he shook his head. “Okay.”

“Good.”

 

>>>>>>

 

Breakfast was a sweet and delicious gesture. The last thing Castiel expected when he fell asleep was to be awakened by soft kisses to his nose and egg sandwiches. They were delectable. Unfortunately, by the time he got upstairs they had to be reheated, but it was still yummy.

Once he was done with his sandwich, Castiel took a couple of Tylenol and a glass of water and went downstairs to his best friend. When he arrived in his room, Charlie was still sleeping. He didn’t want to wake her, so he placed the medicine and the water on his desk, got dressed in his closet, then left the room.

Dean was waiting in the downstairs living room for him. “Hey, gorgeous. What do you want to do today?”

“Well, I have company, so I can’t do what I really want to do today.”

A knowing smile covered Dean’s face as he took a few paces towards Castiel, crowding his personal space. “Really? All day?”

Castiel planted a heated kiss on Dean’s lips. “Definitely,” he whispered, then grabbed the nape of Dean’s neck to pull him closer.

“Ugh,” Charlie interrupted. “I should have stayed in bed. The two of you are gross.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “You know, we’re allowed to be gross. We’ve earned it.”

Charlie rubbed her still sleep filled eyes. “Maybe I should just go home.”

Both Dean and Castiel quickly shook their heads.

Dean was the first to speak. “You don’t have to. You can spend the day with us. We can do something together. Watch TV and shit.”

“We can do a  _ Buffy _ marathon. Or  _ Firefly _ ,” Castiel added.

A small grin started to brightened Charlie’s expression. “I’m always up for some  _ Buffy _ .”

“Top thirty episodes?” Castiel asked.

Charlie nodded her head adamantly. “Yes!”

It only took a few minutes of the show playing before Dean and Charlie were debating the show. First, it was over who the best big bad on the show was. Then, best couple, followed by episode. Surprisingly enough, they both agreed on who the top three characters on the show were. Castiel tried to join in on that conversation by saying how much he enjoyed Oz. The matching glares he received shut him up almost instantly. Considering their favorite character was Willow, Castiel knew he wasn’t winning the conversation.

Most of the day continued in the same way. After a while, Castiel began to realize Charlie and Dean had a lot more in common than they ever realized. If anything, Castiel was afraid he was about to lose his best friend to his boyfriend.  _ They both love you. Stop freaking out. Shouldn’t you be happy they get along so well? _

Eventually, it was too late to continue their marathon and Charlie called her mom to come to pick her up. They made plans to finish their marathon next weekend after the school week was over, then said their goodbyes.

As Charlie was hugging Castiel goodbye, she mumbled low enough for only him to hear, “He’s a keeper.”

Castiel beamed at his best friend. “I know.”

“Good,” she said as she squeezed him a bit tighter. “See you tomorrow morning?”

“Of course. Dean’s picking you up, right?” Castiel inquired.

Charlie nodded. “Yup yup!”

“I love you, Charlie. Text or call if you need me.”

Charlie separated from the hug. “Are you sure?” she questioned as she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

Castiel punched her playfully in the arm. “Shut up.”

Charlie strutted over to her mom’s station wagon laughing as she went. “Love ya, Cas!”

_ Everyone is inevitably going to start calling me that now, aren’t they? _

Once Castiel was back in the house, he said goodnight to his family, then went back downstairs.

As soon as Castiel entered his room, Dean turned around from where his drawer once was. “Where’s my stuff?”

Castiel face sobered from the smile he had been wearing most of the day as he bowed his head. “In a box.”

“Hey, Cas. Don’t do that,” Dean said, concern clear in his voice. “You didn’t know what to expect. I get it.”

“I thought you’d never come back to me. I was going to give the box to Sam at school,” Castiel informed as he went into his closet to grab the box. “This box was the last thing I did actually. I figured after seeing you with Cassie you were definitely done with me.”

Dean’s arms wrapped around Castiel’s waist as he kissed the crook of Castiel’s neck. “I could never be done with you.”

Castiel leaned into the touch of Dean’s body. “I didn’t know that at the time.”

Teeth softly grazed the spot Dean had just kissed causing chills to roll down Castiel’s spine. “Never forget how much I want you,” Dean whispered as he gently nibbled the flesh of Castiel’s neck. “How much I need you,” he breathed, then rolled his hips against Cas’ ass. His thickening length was pressing up against Castiel. “Crave you.”

Castiel swiftly turned around to face Dean, then pushed him up against the wall at the back of his closet.

A surprised gasp escaped Dean’s lips just before he smirked. “Gonna show me who’s boss, Cas? Teach me a lesson in the back of your closet?”

A wicked smile spread across Castiel’s face. He bit his lower lip, then looked up at Dean through his eyelashes. “Well, you have been a naughty boy, Dean.”

Dean licked both of his lips. “I should be punished,” he said as he wiggled his eyebrows.

Castiel maneuvered his hands slightly so his thumbs could gentle graze over Dean’s nipples through his shirt.

The move had the desired effect as Dean’s head fell back against the wall, and his breathing became erratic.

“Something like that,” Castiel murmured into Dean’s ear, then nibbled his earlobe.

Dean whimpered as Castiel started to trail light kisses down his jawline.

“On your knees,” Castiel ordered.

Without another word, Dean dropped to his knees and started to unbuckle Castiel’s belt. His emerald green eyes were nearly black with desire. Dean’s hands fumbled a bit when they got to the button of Castiel’s jeans, but they quickly steadied and got back to the task of taking off his pants. As soon as Castiel’s cock was free of the restraints of both of his boxers and jeans, Dean didn’t hesitate to take Cas into his mouth as far as he could until he gagged.

There was nothing as exquisite as being inside of Dean’s mouth. Considering Castiel could suck his own dick, the fact Dean could blow his mind was an incredible feat. The feeling of his tongue messaging the ridges of his cock was making him weak in the knees. The all-encompassing wet heat of Dean’s glorious mouth was like heaven incarnate.

When Dean grabbed both globes of Castiel’s ass and forced himself to deep throat, Castiel nearly came from the sound of Dean once again gagging on his cock. He grabbed the back of Dean’s head and pulled his hair to get Dean to let go of his engorged member.

A line of spit connected Dean’s mouth to the tip of Castiel’s dick. “Why’d you make me stop?” Dean asked with a husky throat-fucked voice.

Castiel joined Dean on his knees and wrapped his hand around both of them, then began to stroke. “I want to cum with you.”

Dean flashed a devilish grin. “There are other ways for us to cum together without me having to stop sucking your massive cock.”

Castiel stopped stroking and his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Sixty-nine, Cas.”

Castiel surveyed his surroundings. “There is far from adequate space in my closet for something like that to happen.”

Dean chuckled. “You do have a bed, angel.”

“Oh,” Castiel said as his face flushed. “I got a little carried away.”

Dean placed a peck on Castiel’s cheek. “I love you getting carried away.”

Once they were out of the closet and in the bedroom, Castiel helped Dean quickly shed his clothing and move to the bed. As soon as they were both comfortable, Dean’s mouth was back on his cock and trying to swallow him whole.

Following by example, Castiel got to work on Dean’s cock. He started by swirling his tongue around the head, then licking his slit to taste the precum that had been leaking copiously out of his dick.  _ God, I could do this to Dean all day. _

It wasn’t long before they were both moaning and drooling on each other and the bed. Castiel could feel the familiar coiling of heat pooling in his gut. It wouldn’t be long now. From what he could tell, Dean wasn’t far from cumming either.

Experimentally, Castiel took his thumb and pressed against Dean’s perineum. Almost instantly Dean came hard into his mouth. Cas continued to suck him through his orgasm until it all became too much. Between the feeling of Dean’s moans and the taste of his cum in his mouth, Castiel exploded like a firework.

Dean never once let Castiel slip free from him. Dean’s arms circled Castiel’s hips, holding him closer to him as he continued to cum into his inviting mouth.

After their breathing steadied, they crawled to the head of the bed and curled up against each other, sharing kisses.

“You’re amazing,” Dean said with hearts in his eyes.

Castiel blushed because he knew Dean’s expression matched his own. “As are you.”

“I will never leave you ever again,” Dean promised.

Castiel kissed Dean’s forehead, chest, then his lips. “Good,” he said with a smile.

They curled in close to one another and, sharing each other’s breath; they fell asleep.

 

>>>>>>

 

Both Becky and Chuck looked at each other with horror-stricken expressions.

“Remind me to remind Castiel about how noise travels in this house again tomorrow,” Becky whimpered.

“Not a problem. Scheduling the message now.”


	47. Chapter Forty-Seven

Everything fell back into place. The next morning, Dean woke up holding the man he loved close. A smile spread across his face as he watched Cas gently snoring against his chest. There were still another ten minutes until the alarm went off, but Dean was content to stay where he was and watch him sleep.

“Stop it,” Cas said without warning.

Dean nearly jumped out of bed from surprise. “Stop what?”

One blue eye popped open. “Watching me.”

“I’m not the one who started this creepiness, man. You’re the one who likes to watch me sleep, too. So…” Dean stuck out his tongue like the mature twenty-year-old he was.

Cas rolled his eyes and shook his head. After rolling over to shut off the alarm he no longer needed, Cas faced Dean and asked, “Wanna take a shower?”

Dean chuckled. “We'll never get you to school if we start doing that sort of shit in the morning.”

Cas pouted. “I’ll be good. I promise.”

“Ha! I highly doubt it, angel.”

The boo-boo lip he received in response almost broke Dean’s resolve. Luckily, Cas gave up as he huffed out, “Fine.”

When Cas went to roll out of bed to go to the bathroom, Dean grabbed his wrist. “I never said I don’t want you this morning. I just said no showering together.”

With another eye roll, Cas retorted, “Yeah, and doing it in the bed isn’t going to delay anything in the morning.”

“I killed the mood, didn’t I?”

Dean received a bitchface in response.

“Alright, I get it. I’m an ass. Go take a shower,” Dean ordered. “Leave me here to take care of my morning wood on my own,” he added to lay on the guilt a little thick.

Cas gave Dean’s body a once-over. “What morning wood?”

Dean’s eyes fell to his pelvis. The wood he had been sporting only moments ago had disappeared. “Well, I was sporting some pretty wicked wood about three minutes ago. All of this talk about not doing anything must have killed it.”

Cas shrugged. “My offer still stands.”

Mini-Dean perked up with the suggestion.  _ Fuck it. _ Dean stood and pulled on a pair of boxers plus grabbed a spare, then headed for the bedroom door. “You coming or what?”

“Cumming,” Castiel confirmed as he suggestively bit his bottom lip and cocked an eyebrow.

Dean could feel his cock thickening in his boxers. He pointed a finger in the direction of the bathroom. “Go, before we don’t make it there.”

They quietly, yet playfully, chased each other to the bathroom. As soon as the vent fan was on and the door was closed, Dean was on Cas. Castiel barely had a chance to turn on the water before Dean was letting his hands roam all over his lover’s body.  _ Fuck, I want him. _ It wasn’t until they were both under the steady stream of hot water that Cas let himself go and wrapped himself around Dean.

“You’re so perfect. I want you all the time,” Cas moaned before he started to devour Dean’s mouth.

Every inch of their skin was touching. Dean had to focus all of his energy on not cumming just from the glorious friction of them groping and grabbing at one another. A knock on the door certainly helped.

“I’m coming in boys, the knock was merely a courtesy,” Becky said as she entered the small room.

They separated so quickly that Dean had to grasp Cas’ hand to keep him from slipping on the floor.

“Good morning, Mom. Sleep well?” he asked trying to lighten the mood considering they both knew what was coming.

“I know you boys are young and are blessed with the libido to go with it, but dear God in heaven, it is six in the fucking morning.”

The words were there, but nothing came out.  _ Say something, you idiot! _

Luckily, Cas didn’t lose his ability to speak. “We’re sorry, Mom. Can you please leave the bathroom now?”

_ Not what I would have said, but okay. _

“That’s not all I wanted to say to you, boys,” Becky reprimanded.

Dean’s arms were wrapped around himself to avoid touching Cas while Becky was talking.  _ This is hands-down the most awkward shower I have ever taken. _

“What else do you wish the discuss?” Cas asked, somewhat snarkily.

“Don’t snap at me, mister. You should consider yourself lucky to have a mom like me. Not every mom would allow their son’s boyfriend to spend basically every single night in their house, especially when they are fu…”

Dean couldn’t take it anymore. “Okay… um… Becky? Can we have this conversation when I am not naked in the shower?” he asked, sheepishly.

Both Cas and Dean could hear Becky’s eye roll. “Look, noise travels in this house. I heard  **everything** last night. Every grunt, groan…” she paused. “God, I’m gonna be sick just thinking about it.”

“Gay sex must bother you or something, Mom, because you never had an issue with Gabriel screwing an…”

“Quite the contrary, Castiel. I actually enjoy it.”

“Eww, Mom!” Castiel groaned. “Too much information.”

“You’re the one who started it!” Becky fired back.

“Dean covered his face with both hands and shook his head with humiliation. “Okay, so basically keep it down or do what we're doing elsewhere because we’re giving you imagery you would rather not imagine.”

A sigh of relief came from the other side of the shower curtain. “Yes. That’s exactly it. Thank you, Dean.”

“Awesome,” Dean replied. “Can we finish our shower now, Becky?”

“Keep it down, okay?” Becky requested.

“Oh, don’t worry about anything happening, Mom. You effectively killed the mood,” Cas answered.

_ Understatement… _

“Sorry, but after last night it had to be said,” Becky responded. “Well, let’s not waste water. I’ll see you upstairs.”

The rest of the shower was cold. Of course, not temperature wise, but there was no touching. No longing stares. Nothing.  _ Welcome back to hell, Winchester. _

 

>>>>>>

 

After an incredibly awkward breakfast, Castiel and Dean left to pick up Charlie, then head on off to the high school. Considering the morning Dean and Castiel had their goodbye was short and sweet. Dean had to get to the shop, so they promised they would see each other after school and kissed. A couple of students recognized the Impala and either honked or wolf-whistled when they saw them kiss, but hopefully, their relationship wouldn't cause too much of a stir.

Going back to school after a week and a half off was always a struggle. It was a tease. The first week back after winter break was still just a bunch of reviews for AP exams, REGENTS exams, midterms, and finals. The next semester would be starting in two weeks, so they were all preparing for what was yet to come.

The school day went by normally enough. Thankfully, Alastair was either still away or just not at school, so Castiel didn’t have to deal with him. His lackeys were still around, but for some odd reason, they were never as riled up about Castiel unless Alastair was present.

The one thing Castiel was looking forward to the entire day was  _ RENT _ . Sure, he was worried about practice. Still, there was nothing that compared to the idea of being back on that stage.

When the final bell rang, Castiel said goodbye to Mrs. Moseley, then went to the auditorium. Charlie was already waiting for him, along with Max and Alicia. They all took their seats and waited for Ms. Harvelle to make her announcements.

“How’s your face?” Castiel asked as he took his seat between Max and Charlie.

There was some definite bruising on his cheek, but it didn’t look anything like Cas’ face had when Alastair hit him. “It’s okay. Thankfully, he didn’t hit me too hard. I think he realized mid-punch he shouldn’t be hitting me and tried to stop because overall it looks worse than it actually is.”

Castiel nodded in understanding. “Is your mom upset?”

“Pfft. Understatement. I didn’t tell her who it was. I think that’s what’s bothering her the most,” Max admitted. “She can be as vindictive as a witch sometimes. I don’t want her to go after Dean. It was I who crossed a line. I knew you weren’t ready. However, it was still only a kiss on the cheek, so…”

Castiel glanced down at his knotted fingers. “He gets jealous.”

“ALRIGHT, EVERYONE! EYES UP HERE!” Ellen hollered from the front of the auditorium. When everyone was looking at her, she continued. “I have scripts and sheet music. You’ll notice there are a lot of adjustments. Unfortunately, the only way I could get this musical was if I promised to clean it up a bit. Which means no cussing. Also, Charlie, you will not be showing your ass during ‘La Vie Boheme.’ The entirety of that song actually had to go through a massive rewrite. There will not be as many sexual displays of affection, as well as an entire scene had to be cut due to its sexual nature. Let’s just say this is not the  _ RENT _ you are used to or were expecting,”

Many a groan sounded throughout the auditorium.

“Hey, look, you’re not the only one who was disappointed. I happen to be a huge fan of this musical. It deserves to have its artistic integrity left intact. However, this is a high school musical. Children are expected to show up. So, with the help of Ms. Moseley, we were able to clean it up to the board’s liking, and I am proud of what we will be presenting in March to the public. Now, line up.” As students collected sheet music and scripts from the front of the stage, she continued speaking. “We will be doing a read of act one today. You will all have a chance to review the script in your free time, so please save your questions about act two until tomorrow.”

Ms. Harvelle was right. The play was nothing like he expected. It was understandable that the script had to be adjusted, but some of it was stupid. “La Vie Boheme” was close to ridiculous. Maureen is supposed to smack Joanne in the ass. It was changed to her getting pinched on the cheeks. Dildo was now dodo, and the lyrics “faggots, lezzies, dikes, crossdressers, too” were now “to all the different people out there like you.” Considering the next few lyrics after that it made absolutely no sense, but Castiel figured,  _ The show must go on. _

The first rehearsal went well, all things considered. Most of the people in the cast knew the show, so it wasn’t hard to complete the read thru without any serious notes from Ms. Harvelle. One thing he did notice is how every significant note Ms. Harvelle had was directed towards Charlie.  _ This is going to be an exciting musical production. _

As soon as they finished “La Vie Boheme,” Ms. Harvelle dismissed them and told them she would see them all the next day.

When they all went outside to the super late buses, Charlie and the others boarded their busses while Cas walked out to the parking lot towards the Impala. He was surprised to find Dean wasn’t in it.

Castiel looked over his shoulder at the bus and shrugged at the one he knew Charlie was inside of. He walked back towards the school and entered where he had initially exited to go search for Dean.

“Hello, Cas.”

 

>>>>>>

 

Spending the entire day away from Cas after everything they had been through over the winter vacation was torture. He had almost forgotten how horrible it felt waiting for Cas to get out of school and wondering what sort of torment Al was going to come up with.

Things at the shop were reasonably busy, but that was normal.  With the approaching storms that were inevitable this time of year, everyone just wanted to make sure their cars were snow ready.  _ This year is gonna be a doozy from what I hear. _

When three o’clock arrived, and Bobby was finally at the shop, Dean told the guys he would see them later, then got into his baby to head over to the school. He knew Cas probably wouldn’t be done until around four, but he wanted to surprise him.

By the time he reached the school, the parking lot was mostly empty, and the late buses had already left. Considering the fact that he stopped at Dunkin for some coffee, and a tea for Cas, on the way there, it wasn’t that odd that most of the school had already left.

As Dean entered, coffee and tea in hand, he couldn’t help but smile, especially when he saw the auditorium doors.  _ This is where we met. _ The high school held both treasured memories and those he wished he could forget, but no matter what, it would always be a place he would love because it’s where he met Cas.

Just as he was about to open the auditorium doors, Vice Principal Crowley approached him. “Dean, my boy. Long time no talk. What are you doing here?”

The last thing Dean wanted to do was shoot the shit with Crowley, but the guy helped him get the job that brought him to Cas in the first place, so it was best just to suck it up and talk to the guy. “Vice Principal Crowley, it’s great to see you. I’d shake your hand, but,” he said as he held up both of the drinks.

“No worries. I won’t hold it against you.” Crowley eyed him, then once again asked, “What are you doing here?”

“The musical. Ellen said they’re doing  _ RENT _ . I always wanted to play Roger, but she didn’t get approved until now, so I thought I would check in on her. You know, see how it’s all going.”  _ Quick thinking. _

“So, I’m assuming the coffee is for her. She doesn’t drink tea.”

Dean’s eyes widened. “How do you know that?”

“The Keurig machine in the teachers’ lounge broke a few weeks back. She was one of the people who complained about it endlessly until it was replaced.”

“You can make tea in a Keurig,” Dean supplied.

“Yes, but she was complaining about the lack of coffee, not tea.”

“Ah…”

Crowley gave Dean a knowing smile. “Come to my office, Dean. We have something to discuss.”

Dean slowly approached Crowley. “What’s that?”

“Just follow me.”

“Will we be long?”

“No. I don’t think so. There is just something I wish to discuss with you momentarily.”

Dean glanced down at his watch.  _ They should be getting out soon. They’re probably working on only act one today. I don’t want him to be alone for too long. _ “As long as it doesn’t take too long. I don’t want the coffee to get cold.”

“Yes. That would be catastrophic.”

The look he received from Crowley made him feel beyond uncomfortable, but he was curious as to what Crowley could want so he followed him the short distance to his office.

As soon as they got into Crowley’s office, Crowley shut the door behind them and took a seat behind his monstrosity of a desk. He laced his fingers together and laid them in front of him on the desk. “So, Dean. I’ve heard rumors about you, and to be honest, I didn’t believe them until about five minutes ago.”

Dean swallowed hard.  _ Shit. _

“Now, I’m going to give you a chance, to be honest with me. Then, I’m going to tell you what I know.”

Dean sat there in stunned silence.  _ Who told him? _

“Well?”

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about, Vice Principal Crowley,” Dean stammered

“Please, just Crowley.”

The room suddenly grew what felt like a million degrees hotter. “Did I do something wrong? I honestly don’t know what this is about.”

Crowley let out a long exhale, then sat back in his chair, his hands now on his stomach. “Teacher and student relations, Dean. Are you aware of how they’re usually meant to proceed?”

“Yes, sir.”

“You do?”

“Yes.”

“Then, explain why I have heard from multiple sources that you were fraternizing with a student both on and off school grounds.”

“If you’re talking about Cas, then…”

“Oh, so you do know what I am talking about,” Crowley said with a condescending tone. “Please, Dean, explain to me why you have been spending time with a student when you are considered his teacher.”

“He’s a friend.”

“So, friends make-out in public?”

All of Dean’s air left him as his jaw dropped. “What?”

“A very concerned student approached me earlier today saying he saw the two of you kissing.”

Dean’s blood ran cold through him. “Let me guess. Was this student Alastair Lucif?”

“I cannot say whether or not the student is or is not Mr. Lucif.”

“That creep put Cas in the hospital, twice.”

“That’s pure conjecture. Both times Mr. Lucif wasn’t…”

“He’s a liar!” Dean snapped. “His uncle got him off there, and you know it.”

Crowley’s jaw tightened as he ground his teeth. “Don’t talk to me about Nick Lucif. The man is the devil incarnate. Bastard wrecks my cherry Aston and gets o…” Crowley paused. “Shit.”

Dean was leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed over his chest with a bitch face.  _ Told ya. _

“Be that as it may, you have now confirmed with me that you have been spending time with Castiel Shurley. I cannot allow that.”

“Crowley, I no longer work here. It shouldn’t be an issue if I spend time with a student.”

Crowley’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “What?”

“I don’t work here anymore. It was only for one semester, remember?”

“Bollocks,” Crowley said with a sigh.

“Slipped your memory, huh?”

“Apparently,” Crowley admitted with a nod. “Yes.”

“Can I go, now? As you now know, Cas is waiting for me.”

Crowley waved him off with a flourish looking defeated. “Yes. Go.”

Dean couldn’t get up fast enough.  _ That was a waste of fucking time. _ He grabbed both cups and stood to leave.

“Dean, one more thing.”

Dean turned, then glared at Crowley. “Yes.”

“No kissing around the school, please? Even though you no longer teach here, I would prefer not to hear about this again. Next time, it may come from a more reputable source and may not be said to me. There are still three other Vice Principals here as well as a head Principal who would not take too kindly to finding out an ex-student teacher is spending time with one of the school's students. That does not look good on an employment record, Dean.”

Dean gave him a curt nod before saying, “Not a problem,” then he left without another word.

When Dean got to the auditorium, it was completely empty. Ellen had obviously dismissed everyone already. He exited the side of the auditorium and headed towards the outside. The busses were still there, so hopefully, Cas hadn’t gone too far.

“Hey, Dean!” Charlie called.

Dean swiftly followed the sound of her voice. When he found the bus, she was peeking her head out of he all but ran over to her. “Where is he?”

Her face was horror-stricken. “You didn’t find him inside? He just went in like two minutes ago.”

“No. I was with Crowley.”

“Shit.” Charlie went back into the bus, then reappeared with her bag. “You’re taking me home. Let’s go find him.”


	48. Chapter Forty-Eight

_ The bathrooms hadn’t been cleaned yet _ , was the first thought that came into Castiel’s mind as he was thrown onto the floor near the urinals.

Alastair sneered. “Aw, why are you so upset? Didn’t you miss me?”

“Why on earth would I miss you?” Cas asked with an incredulous expression. “You’re a cancer upon this earth; a puss filled oozing sore. I could never miss you.”

“Sweet Angel. I’m exactly what you need.”

“Don’t call me that,” Castiel growled as he picked himself up off the floor.

Alastair’s expression morphed into a mischievous smirk. “I’ll call you whatever I want. Would you prefer faggot?”

“I would prefer you to die in a pool of your own vomit, but we can’t all get what we want, can we?” Castiel deadpanned.

Alastair was suddenly in his face. “I’ve been nice so far today. Don’t make me be mean, Castiel.”

Castiel cocked an eyebrow. “This is nice to you? Throwing me in a bathroom and forcing me to talk to you when I so obviously despise you. That’s nice?”

Alastair leaned in and smelled him, then whispered. “Very nice.”

Without another thought, Castiel slammed on Alastair with an uppercut to the chin, sending him flying backward into one of the sinks that lined the opposite side of the room. Castiel darted towards the door, but unfortunately, the blow only momentarily disoriented Alastair.

Castiel was slammed up against the wall.

“Ah ah ah,” Alastair grunted, his breathing ragged. “I didn’t say you could go anywhere. Did I?”

No matter how hard Castiel tried, he couldn’t shake Alastair off. He tried elbowing him in the stomach, but his school bag was in the way of Castiel being able to reach him.

Then, gangly fingers started to wander across Castiel’s torso. “Aw. Poor Angel. Can’t run.”

_ Never again! _ Castiel jumped and put all his energy into pushing off of the wall with his legs. Alastair and Castiel landed on the giant garbage pail.

A muffled “Cas” came from outside.  _ He found me. _

Alastair scrambled to his feet, then growled, “This is never going to be over between us, Castiel. Never!” He made a quick exit.

From the outside, Castiel heard Dean shout, “Get back here!”

Charlie entered the bathroom. A wave of emotions went across her face — first concern, then relief, and then fury. Unbridled rage. “That son of a bitch! Did he hurt you?”

“He tried,” Castiel answered. “He failed.” He looked around him. “I seem to have made a mess.”

“Fuck the mess, Cas. You were almost assaulted!”

“Technically, I was, Charlie. He pushed me around. He-he… oh, God, he… he t-t-t…” His lungs began to constrict making it impossible for him to breath.

Charlie was next to him in an instant.

The bathroom door slamming open only momentarily startled Charlie and Castiel. “Son of a bitch had a car waiting. He was fucking planning this one, too. I fucking lost him!” Dean roared as his hands went into his hair, pulling it with frustration. “He fucking got away, again!”

“Dean,” Charlie hissed. “We have other more important things to worry about. Something happened.”

Castiel and Dean’s eyes met and within an instant Dean knew.  All of the color drained out of Dean’s face as he fell to the floor to wrap Castiel in his arms. “He’s gone, baby. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here. Crowley said we wouldn't be long. Shh, angel, I’m here.”

“He called me that when he tried to touch me,” Castiel stammered.

The strong arms Castiel loved so much wrapped around him a little tighter. “He’s trying to get between us, baby. Don’t let him hurt you.”

As soon as Castiel had calmed down enough to be moved, Charlie and Dean took him outside to the car.

Inside the Impala, Dean started in on Charlie. “Why didn’t you wait with him?”

“Alastair wasn’t at school today! I figured he would be okay!” Charlie fired back. “He wasn’t there this morning, and he wasn’t in gym. If he’s not there by the sixth period you kind of assume you’re not going to see the guy, don’t ya?”

“That’s no excuse, Charlie!” Dean snapped. “If the guy can show up at a movie theater on Black Friday, him showing up to school as late as he wants shouldn’t be an issue.”

“Well, why the hell were you with Crowley?”

Dean gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles were white. “The asshole turned me into Crowley for seeing Cas outside of school. He needed me distracted. If it weren’t for the fact that I am no longer employed there, I would have been longer.”

“Will the two of you stop arguing, please?” Castiel begged.  _ I don’t need this shit right now. _

Charlie wrapped her arms around him from the back seat. “I am never leaving you alone ever again. He will never get another chance.”

“It’s never going to be over between the two of us. He promised me that,” Castiel divulged.

“Mother fucker,” Dean muttered. “I really hate that son of a bitch.”

Before they knew it, Dean was pulling into Charlie’s driveway. They all agreed that Charlie would no longer be taking the bus just in case Alastair tried to pull something like that again, then said their goodbyes.

During the short drive to Castiel’s house, Dean and Castiel agreed that it would be best to not say anything to Becky or Chuck about what happened. Dean argued that they shouldn’t keep anything from his parents, but Castiel thought it would be best not to freak his parents out with something that almost happened.

Most of the evening, Dean kept a wary eye on Castiel. Almost as if Castiel was a bomb that would go off at any moment. If Castiel were honest with himself, he knew he was in need of diffusing.

After dinner, Castiel was beyond antsy. He could still feel Alastair’s breath on his face and Alastair’s hands on his chest. Castiel wanted to forget his touch, his scent, and his voice. He wanted to go back to a time where the word angel didn’t send a chill down his spine.

As they were getting ready for bed, Castiel turned to Dean. “Do you still love me?”

Dean stopped everything he was doing and turned to Castiel. An incredulous look on his face. “How could you even ask that? Of course, I do!”

Castiel nodded. “Then, I think we should have sex.”

 

>>>>>>

 

As Dean chased Alastair out of the school building, he knew he had once again lost him. Once again, Alastair would get away from facing the consequences of his actions. The person who meant most to him in the world would once again have to endure the nightmares of his past because the prick was always one step ahead of them.

The rest of the night, Dean studied Cas’ behavior by keeping a close eye on him. Something inside of him told him Cas was not right. Then, Cas had to throw him a curve ball

Dean’s jaw dropped as his eyes widened in a what he knew was a near-comical way. “What?”

Cas’ face flushed in embarrassment. He looked down at his knotted fingers, then repeated, “We should have sex.”

“Cas, I know why you want to, but I am not having sex just to have sex. When we have sex for the first time… I want it to be because both of us want to,” Dean explained.

“Do you want me?”

_ What kind of question is that?  _ “You know I do.”

“Then, why can’t we have sex? I don’t get it!” Cas said, his voice starting to rise.

“Look, I know I am basically turning into a girl by saying this, but when we have sex, I want it to be special. I don’t want that prick to have anything to do with it, Cas. Right now, he has everything to do with it.”

Cas moved closer to Dean. When he was finally within arm’s length, he grabbed both of Dean’s hands and put them on him. Dean could feel Cas shiver from the feeling of someone’s hands on him. 

“I need him to be wiped from my memory,” Cas explained. “I need you, Dean. I need you more than you could ever understand.”

Dean wrapped his arms around Castiel and held him close. “I want you, Cas. I will help you in any way I can, but I will not do that tonight.”

Cas shook his head and pushed away. “You don’t love me.”

Dean threw his arms up as he huffed out a breath in frustration. “How can you possibly say that! How dare you say I don’t love you because I don’t want to hurt you!” A million thoughts ran through Dean’s mind. There was no way he was laying a hand on Cas tonight. By the time they would finish, the entire act would be tainted by thoughts of Alastair and everything he had done that day. When he looked into Cas’ eyes, Castiel was pleading with Dean to take him.  _ Do something fucking stupid drastic, or he’s not gonna drop it.  _ “You know what… Fuck this right now.” He went over to his jeans and started the process of putting them on.

“Where are you going?” Castiel asked, a shred of panic in his voice.

_ To sleep in my car cause you won’t listen to me.  _ “Home for the night,” Dean lied.

“Don’t leave me, Dean!” Cas cried. “I’m sorry I pushed this. I pushed us. Please, don’t leave me.”

Dean’s head fell into his hands.  _ Hold out for another few moments; he’ll change his mind. Don’t show him you’re about to break. _

“I won’t be able to sleep without you here, Dean. Please,” Cas choked out, tears evident in his voice.

As horrible as it may seem, the second the tears began to fall, Dean breathed a sigh of relief. He knew he manipulated the situation, but in the end, it was for both of their benefits. He took off his jeans and walked over to Castiel and put his arms around him. “I’m here for you, baby. Just give us time, okay?”

“Okay,” Cas agreed with a nod of his head.

“I love you, an…”  _ Don’t call him that again. Al tainted that for us. _ “Cas”

Cas kissed Dean. “I will always be your angel, Dean.”

“I didn’t want…”

With one final kiss to just shut Dean up, they both crawled into bed and fell asleep. Or at least that’s what he wanted Cas to think. Sleep alluded Dean all night. Not only was he still reeling from what had happened earlier in the day with Alastair, now he had to deal with Cas pushing something on himself he might not be ready for. Dean knew why Cas wanted him at that moment. Sure, Dean could have overlooked Cas’ true intentions, but then he would be no better than the monster who did everything to him in the first place. He would become Alastair. Every touch would mean something different. Everything moment would be wrong. The last thing Dean wanted was for their love to feel wrong. Even though Cas was giving Dean his consent, it would be far from consensual.

When morning did finally did come, Dean was beyond exhausted. He had spent most of the night worrying or comforting a nightmare riddled Cas.

From what he could tell whatever sort of making up they could do wasn’t going to happen, especially after he asked, “You okay, Cas?”

Dean received an answer of, “Don’t ask stupid questions,” in response to his question.

_ Fuck you, Alastair! _


	49. Chapter Forty-Nine

The beginning of the year was moving far too fast for Dean’s liking. Classes would be starting on the twenty-second and his free time was disappearing at lightning speed right before his eyes. Of course, by free time he meant time with Cas.

During the week that Castiel had nothing but tests, life had been a dream. Sure, things were still a little strained between them after the whole “we should have sex” debacle, but they were taking their time. Or, at least, that's what Dean kept telling himself.

Dean would bring Cas everywhere with him as soon as his two hours at the school were finished. He could tell Cas was tired of never being left alone, but just having him there made a world of difference.

At the end of that week, everything went wrong when Cas brought up that he had to go back to work.

“You don’t have to go back to work, Cas. You have plenty of money,” Dean replied after first being told about him going back to work at the library.

“My parents and family have money,” Cas mentioned. “That doesn’t instantly mean I have money. I need to work. I need money.”

“I have money, too, Cas. I’ll take care of anything you may need.”

The applause-worthy bitch face he received in response was answer enough.

“I’m not a huge fan of you going back to work,” Dean admitted. “I can’t be there with you all day.”

“Nothing is going to happen to me with a bunch of people around. He’s not stupid.”

“You sure about that? Who’s to say he won’t do something insanely stupid exactly like that?”

Cas rolled his eyes. “You and my mom, I swear.”

“Becky agrees with me?”  _ Then why the hell is he working?! _

“When does she not agree with you when it comes to my safety? When I don’t hear it from you, I hear it from her. I’m sick of it,” Castiel griped.

“We love you, that’s why we worry and argue with you all of the time. We want to protect you!”

Cas mumbled something under his breath, then said, “Just let me go to work. I need this job. I need some form of freedom.”

“Did you already tell Joshua that you’re coming back to work?”

“My doctor's note ran out over a week ago. He didn’t fill my spot this entire time even though he needed the help. So, yes. Of course, I told him I would be back at work as soon as possible which is tomorrow morning. Can we just go to sleep now?” Cas asked with a hiss.

Dean wanted to fight more, but if Cas had already been having the same fight with his mom, the last thing Dean wanted to do was add onto what he had already heard. So, he let them go to sleep.

When Dean’s new semester arrived, he was happy with his new schedule. He tried his best to make it so he would be there for Cas when he needed him. Most of his classes started around eight in the morning and ended early enough for him to pick him up from school. The only thing he dreaded was the night class on Tuesdays at six.  _ It’s all for Cas, _ he told himself. Unfortunately, in this situation, it didn’t help. Getting to the school around that time of day was going to be a nightmare.  _ He better love me. _

The next thing Dean knew, his birthday had arrived. Cas and Dean were planning on having the big celebration on Friday when they were going to see  _ Rock Of Ages _ , but Benny said he couldn’t let him turn twenty-one without having at least one legal drink.

So, Dean and Benny, after having a little get together with the band and Cas, went to the bar. Nothing spectacular happened considering it was a school night. Plus, Dean wasn’t really into it. So, he went home early to his empty bed wishing he could go to Cas. However, it was past eleven and Becky would kill him, so he curled up into a ball and fell asleep dreaming of Cas.

 

>>>>>>

 

January went by faster than Castiel was expecting. Work at the library started up again for him the second week of January. The fights his return had caused were beyond anything Castiel had ever had to deal with. Between the one argument with Dean and the endless stream of worrying from his mom, he was done. The fact that everyone always sided against what he wanted did not help either. Castiel felt utterly alone even though he was never away from anyone for longer than it took for him to shower.

Not to mention the strain Dean turning him down had put on their relationship. At the time, it felt like the end, but as time went on, Castiel knew Dean did it for both of them. Not that he was happy with the decision Dean had made for the both of them or the fact that the subject hadn’t been broached since he first brought it up.

By the time Dean’s birthday week arrived, Castiel was beyond excited to finally do something that wasn’t within ten miles of his house. Most of his time, since Dean was off from school until the twenty-second, was spent between work, school, musical rehearsals, Dean’s house for band practice, or the shop. So, a change of pace was needed. Not that Castiel didn’t like spending time at the shop. The guys at the shop were very informative and answered any questions Castiel had.

They didn’t go crazy on Dean’s actual birthday. It was a simple trip to Dean’s house where they had Chinese take-out with the band. Dean took him home after so he could have a few drinks at the bar with Benny. Unfortunately, no one else was old enough except the two of them, so they all said their goodbyes from there.

The trip to the city to see  _ Rock Of Ages _ wasn’t going to be anything extravagant. Dean and Castiel agreed not to get overly dressed up considering they were only going to Ellen’s Stardust Diner after the show, not Carmine’s or something more extravagant. Still, Cas was more than a little excited to go.

The day of the show, Becky picked Castiel and Charlie up from school rather than Dean. Apparently, Dean had some last minute things to settle at the shop, so he was running late. At least, that’s what Becky said.

Even though Dean and Castiel agreed not to go crazy when they wouldn’t go nuts when it came to dressing up for the trip to the city, Cas was still freaking out about what to wear. Charlie agreed to go home with him until Dean came over so that she could help him.

“I thought you said it wasn’t a big deal,” Charlie groaned as Castiel tried on the fifth outfit.

Castiel was hanging the latest sweater in the closet.  _ Why doesn’t she get it? _ “It may not be a big deal, but it’s still a big deal, ya know?”

The eye roll was loud enough that Castiel could hear it in the closet. “Whatever.” Suddenly, Charlie was right there in the closet with him. “You’re hopeless. Get out.”

After pouting for all of two seconds, Castiel left the closet and sat on his bed.  _ I am not hopeless. _

When she exited, she was holding a pair of medium gray straight leg jeans that he knew hugged him perfectly, a black sweater, and a white wife beater. “Here. Wear that,” she said as she threw the items onto the bed. “Put that on while I chose shoes, jacket, and scarf. The city is cold as fuck in the winter.”

“New York is cold as fuck in the winter, Charlie.”

“True story!”

Once his black sweater was in place, Charlie exited the closet for the final time with his leather bomber jacket, a black leather belt, black boots, and a black scarf. “Wear that, too,” She commanded as she tossed them onto the bed.

Cas nodded.

“Now, let’s fuck with your hair a bit.”

 

>>>>>>

 

_ Why the hell am I so nervous? It’s not like I’ve never been to the city before! _

Dean’s palms were sweating, and he was staring at his closet for what felt like the millionth time that day trying to decide what to wear. Usually, he was great at this. He could do this in his sleep, but he just felt like tonight was a big deal.

They agreed upon not dressing up. The theater wasn’t the way it used to be where you would dress up. It was more casual. Plus, it wasn’t like they were going to see _Phantom of the Opera_ or something. They were going to see _Rock Of Ages._ Mind you; Dean had never sat so close to the stage when he'd gone to a Broadway musical. He finally had to admit to himself; he was at a loss. So, he took out his cell phone and texted the one female he knew wasn’t busy.

**Dean: HELP!!**

**Pam: What do you want?**

_ Wow… maybe I should have texted someone else. _

**Dean: I’m going to the city with Cas today, remember? For some odd reason, I’m drawing a blank on what to wear.**

The little dots danced for a while until he finally received a message.

**Pam: I’m in a giving mood. I’ll help. Where are you planning on eating dinner?**

**Dean: Ellen’s Stardust Diner.**

**Pam: So, casual. That should be easy. Why are you having a hard time?**

**Dean: We’re gonna be sitting in the Orchestra.**

**Pam: Oh…**

**Pam: Um…**

**Pam: So, not casual casual.**

**Dean: Yeah, I guess that’s my worry.**

Dean never had a hard time holding his own anywhere, but the fact that he was going to have to play it rich for the night. He wasn’t sure he would be able to play it off that easily.

**Pam: No worries. I got you covered. Got anything picked out so far?**

Dean took a few pictures of what he had already out on his bed and sent it over to her.

**Pam: Ok. I like that light grey v-neck sweater. Can you take a quick picture of you wearing it?**

Dean put the sweater on. It was a little tight on his arms. He hadn’t worn it since he was in high school. It only slightly covered the waistline of his jeans. He took a picture of himself in the mirror that was inside the door of his closet and sent it.

**Pam: No. That won’t work. Try the white sweater.**

This one fit like a glove.  _ Damn... _

**Pam: Perfect! Ok, do you have any jeans that are a little loose around the waist on you? Preferably relaxed fit bootcut, medium wash?**

**Dean: That’s oddly specific…**

**Pam: Just fucking trust me, Winchester!**

He looked at the jeans he had laying in front of him. He had a pair as she described. They weren’t the right color. They were a dark wash. He took a picture and sent it.

**Dean: These fit me the way you described. They’re not the right color though.**

**Pam: Actually, they go even better. Now a smooth leather belt with a silver buckle. Make sure the buckle is a little big.**

Dean only owned three belts. Luckily one of them perfectly matched.

**Dean: I have one of those. Now shoes…**

**Pam: Now I know you have these. You know those black ankle boots you have without the laces? The ones that probably match the belt you have, right?**

**Dean: Yeah…?**

**Pam: Wear those. Round everything thing off with that black bomber jacket you have. You’re gonna need that olive green scarf you have, too.**

**Dean: Thanks, Pam. I owe you one.**

**Pam: You owe me plenty, hotshot. But, I’ll let this one fly cause it’s your birthday trip to the city.**

Dean smiled brightly at his cell phone. By the time he was done making sure his hair was on point, Dean was about ready just to call it a night. Even though he knew the night was only just beginning, he was already exhausted.

Just as he was about to leave, he had an idea. Sure, it was a long shot, but Dean thought,  _ Why not? _ He grabbed a couple of packages of lube plus two condoms, then put them in his pocket.  _ Better safe than sorry. _


	50. Chapter Fifty

When the Impala finally pulled in front of the house, Castiel jumped up and was out the door. With a shouted goodbye over his shoulder towards his mom, he locked the door and ran out to Dean.

Dean as per usual looked like sin. If they didn’t have a schedule they were trying to maintain, Castiel had half a mind to take him into the back seat and do all sorts of nasty things to him, but they had plans, so off to the city they went.

The train station was literally right up the street from the house, so they didn’t have to travel far to get to their first destination. Thankfully, there were some spots still left over in the parking garage. The neighborhood wasn’t too bad, but Castiel didn’t want Dean to have to worry about his baby while they were away in the city.

They stopped at Dunkin before the train arrived to pick up a coffee and a tea. It was freezing, so warmth was needed. The winter so far had not been kind. The weather had no idea what it was doing half the time. If they were going to the city the next day, the weather prediction was it was going to be in the fifties, but of course, they weren’t lucky enough to get the halfway decent weather during their journey into the city.

The train ride wasn’t anything crazy. They sat there talking about what had been going on since earlier that morning. Castiel spoke about how they were going to have to just make it without him at musical practice because of his plans, but he really didn’t care. He was going to one of his favorite places.

The city was gross. There was no denying that pollution was just part of what the city was. However, only a real New Yorker would still love it. You could find anything and everything in the city at any time of the day. The place earns its name as “the city that never sleeps,” and Castiel couldn’t wait to explore it with his love.

When the automated announcement said, “This is the train to Penn Station. Next stop, Penn Station.” Castiel started bouncing in his seat. A broad smile was threatening to split his face.

“You a little excited, Cas?” Dean asked as he beamed at Castiel.

Castiel failed to hide his elation. “It’s been months since I’ve been to the city. The last time I was here was May when my Aunt Amara was visiting.”

Dean’s grin faltered for a moment before he spoke. “She was probably here for me at the time.”

Castiel’s face sobered as he placed a hand on Dean’s knee. “You’re not that guy anymore. You’re amazing.” He kissed Dean without a second thought. “Now,” he started, “where are we going first? The show doesn’t start until seven. So, we have around three hours to kill beforehand. Do you want to eat first or explore?”

“Well, why don't we go eat first, then go to the show. The city is never going anywhere we can explore at any time,” Dean concluded.

Castiel nodded in agreement. “I, unfortunately, have a busy day tomorrow, so that’s probably a good idea.”

When the train finally stopped and signaled it was time to depart, Castiel grabbed Dean’s hand and pulled him forward into the hustle and bustle that was and is New York. They took the escalators up passing little stores as they went.  

As soon as they were outside, and Macy’s was in his line of sight, Castiel’s face split into an even wider grin. “Subway or walk?” Ellen’s was about a twenty-minute walk from where they were currently standing.

Dean rubbed the nape of his neck as he thought. “Well,” he began, “the 1 or 2 can get us there in under ten minutes, but we’ll be waiting for it to get to us in the meantime. Plus, I don’t think I have more than a ride left on my subway pass. So, we’d have to reload before we go.”

“How do you know which subway to take?” Castiel inquired.

“I do research. Geez, I swear. You and Sam must think I live under a rock. What do you think I was doing besides perfecting this, this afternoon, huh?” Dean asked as he gestured a hand over himself. “I want today to be perfect.”

Castiel could hardly contain his jubilance. He wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck and planted a lingering kiss on his lips. “You’re the best boyfriend. I love you.”

Dean beamed. “I love you, too.”

“Get a room,” someone barked as they passed by.

“Up yours, douchebag,” Dean snapped back at them.

_ Gotta love New York. _

They eventually decided to take the subway to the restaurant. Dean reloaded his pass for an additional five rides at one of the machines, and then they walked over towards one of the gates where they could scan to go through to the train.

Riding the subway is not something that Castiel had experienced more than once. The only time he had ridden the subway previously, he was lucky enough not to have any occurrences. Still, from what he had heard lucky was not the word for it.

Jo once had a woman sneeze right in her face while her mouth was open. Charlie had someone follow her from one stop to another begging for a handshake. Gabriel almost got into a fight with a hobo on more than one occasion. Ash once saw a man wearing nothing but a t-shirt and tighty-whiteys claiming, “they only said no shirt, no shoes, man. They ain’t said nothing about pants.”

All things considered, Castiel still felt those stories were horrible, but they weren’t terrifying. Those stories could have all taken a darker turn, but all of them were fortunate enough not to become victims of any sort of violence.

Just like last time, Castiel was blessed with an uneventful subway ride through the city. They had a few people who stared at them, but most of the trip was quiet.  _ They’re probably all wondering how the hell I ended up with a male model. _

Almost as if Dean could hear what Cas was thinking he cocked an eyebrow at Cas and said, “Stop it.”

Castiel tilted his head, feigning innocence. “Stop what?”

Dean kissed him. “Stop being handsome. It’s distracting,” he explained with a crooked grin.

Castiel’s face flushed. “Look who’s talking, Mr. Sexy.”

Dean’s face sobered. “It’s just a face, angel. You’ve got the whole package.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Uh-huh, sure.”

“Hey,” Dean began as he cupped Castiel’s cheek, “You’re the trophy. Not me. Remember that.”

Without hesitation, Castiel leaned in to steal another kiss. “You’re just as much of a prize as I am, Dean.”

“Ugh, gross,” someone grumbled nearby.

Just to piss them off a little more, Castiel planted another kiss on Dean’s lips and deepened it.

When someone wolf-whistled from somewhere on the train, Dean broke the kiss and smiled, “You’ve gotta stop distracting me. We could miss our stop.”

Castiel shrugged. “Oh, well. So what if we miss it?” he asked as he leaned in for another kiss.

Two fingers pushed his lips away with a chuckle. “I love you, but I haven’t been to Ellen’s in a while. So, we’re gonna go eat some expensive ass burgers and sing our hearts out along with the waitstaff. Capisce?”

“Actually, it’s capisci.”

Dean’s eyebrows furrowed. “What?”

“Capisce is for he, she, or you polite. Capisci is just for you. You polite is for someone you are trying to show respect for. You don’t call me sir, so why would you say capisce?”

Dean blinked a few time before he smirked. “Do you want me to call you sir?”

A tremendous amount of heat started to fill Castiel’s entire body. He cleared his throat a few times before he decided not to answer.

Thankfully, their stop had arrived, which Cas informed Dean of and received a “Yes, sir,” in response.

_ Not gonna lie — I kind of like it. _

 

>>>>>>

 

The city was always insane. Dean loved the city for the memories that it held. The crazy nights out with the band. The first field trip he took in high school, followed by his first trip to the Museum of Natural History with Sammy. Dean actually planned on going to school in the city. He dreamed about it. Was even accepted to NYU. However, the last thing he wanted to do was go to school with his ex, Cassie. So, rather than attend his dream school, he ended up going to school on Long Island, which, overall, wasn’t a bad thing. He was able to save money on tuition by not living in the city. Plus, he met Cas. So, all in all, he couldn’t complain.

Dean wasn’t too thrilled about the decision to use the subway, but the temperatures outside decided for him. Thankfully, it was a rather quiet journey to Ellen’s, so he didn’t have to worry much.

Of course, there was a line when they arrived at Ellen’s. How could there not be? The diner was famous for the performing waitstaff, so it wasn’t odd for there to be a line at around five at the beginning of the weekend.

As a way to keep them warm, and also a way to just be close to Cas, Dean opened up his jacket, then grabbed Cas’ arms so he could wrap them around him.

“You’re the sweetest,” Cas nearly cooed as he nuzzled in close to Dean.

Dean chuckled. “I just like it when your hands are on me.”

Cas playfully shoved Dean away before he gripped him tight and held him close once again.

Once they were finally inside and out of the cold, the hostess greeted them with a huge smile. “Welcome to Ellen’s! Have you been here before?”

Dean nodded as Cas answered with a hearty, “Yes.”

“Perfect! Well, welcome back! Two?” she asked.

Again Dean simply nodded as Cas replied, “Please.”

The hostess nodded. She looked around the restaurant, then down at her computer screen. “A table should be opening up soon. Give me a minute. I’ll be right back.”

When she returned, she grabbed two menus, then said, “Follow me.”

Dean was elated when he saw where she was leading them to the center of the restaurant where most of the action would be. The only other time Dean had sat there, a server hopped right onto the seat next to him and belted out “Belle” with gumption. That particular server was actually on YouTube for his rendition of the said song.  _ This place is fucking epic. _

From what Dean could tell, Cas was just as excited about their spot as Dean was. They both knew they were in for a good night.

As soon as Dean had a chance to look at the menu, he grimaced. “Twenty-five dollars for a burger,” he grumbled.”They’re lucky their staff is talented, and the food is good ‘cause if that burger isn’t wiping my ass, too, at a price like that, that’s highway robbery.”.

“Don’t worry about it,” Cas said with a grin. “It’s my treat.”

“Cas, you don’t have to buy me dinner. You and your family have done enough for me already.”

Cas waved him off, then said, “I’m going to order the Mighty Mo with bacon. What about you?”

Dean looked back down at the menu. “I don’t know the Be Bop a Lula burger sounds good. I think I’ll get that without the mushrooms.”

“Sounds yummy. Will you share my egg cream with me if I get it?” Cas asked.

“It better be a big friggin egg cream for almost five dollars.”

Suddenly, a person appeared by their side with a massive smile on their face. “Hey, you two. My name is Brie, and I’ll be your server for the evening. What can I get ya?”

Once they were finished ordering their dinner, Brie pinched Dean’s cheek and said, “I’ll put those burgers right in for you, handsome.”

Dean was flabbergasted. The last thing he expected was to be hit on by their server, especially since he felt it was pretty clear that the two of them were on a date

Cas, on the other hand, looked like he was ready to smite the server where she stood.

“She’s just hunting for tip, angel. No need to get jealous,” Dean quickly explained.

“Well, then she is barking up the wrong tree because this meal is my treat,” Cas retorted.

“Cas, I can pay for the meal. You and your family have done enough. At least let me get dinner.”

Cas rolled his eyes. “You paid for both of our train tickets and the subway.”

“Yeah? And?”

“I can pay for things, Dean. It is not your job to pay for everything,” Cas began. “Plus, this is your birthday trip to the city. The least you can let me do is pay for dinner, especially since you didn’t want a gift.” The way Cas was talking, he wasn’t leaving any room for argument. Not only that, he was laying on the guilt thicker than an Italian grandmother when it came to the birthday gift.

Dean threw his hands up in defeat. “Fine. You can pay for dinner.”

The smile Dean received in return was gift enough, but he kept that fact to himself and just smiled back.

Within a matter of minutes, their food was delivered. Dean’s taste buds were buzzing from the meaty goodness of his burger. Cas was moaning around his burger as per usual.  _ I love that he loves burgers as much as I do. _

Servers performed around them. Most of the songs chosen were either Disney or Les Miserables. That was until their server came up.

The intro started to play, and Cas grinned. “Oh, I love this song.”

“‘I can hear the bells. Well, doncha hear ‘em chime?’” As she started to sing the next line she grabbed a random patrons hand and slammed it on her chest over her heart. “‘Can’t you feel my heartbeat keeping perfect time?’”

“She’s hilarious,” Dean commented.

Cas chuckled. “I agree.”

Brie’s eyes set on her next target. She pointed her finger at Dean and sang, “And all because he touched me. He looked at me stared. Yes, he bumped me. My heart was unprepared when he tapped me and knocked me off my feet. One little touch, now my life’s complete.”

What happened next could only be described as a mockery of a seduction technique. She sang only to Dean. No one else. She crawled on top of seats, then sat down next to him. Petted his hair. Pecked him on the cheek after she sang the lyrics, “‘Because round three's when we kiss inside his car. Won't go all the way, but I'll go pretty far.’”

From there she stood up on the small walkway they had again and belted out the rest of the song while still going back to Dean on occasion to either just pet him or grab his arm. By the end of the song, she was all but sitting in his lap singing, “‘I can hear the bells’” over and over until the song was done.

When she finished, she handed the mic off to another server, got off of Dean and stepped over to Cas. She kissed him on the cheek and said, “Thanks for being such a good sport. You two are an adorable couple.” Then, without another word, she walked away.

Cas was wearing an expression of being completely befuddled. “Well, I can’t be a dick and leave her a lousy tip now.”

“I don’t want you to get pissed, Cas. But I gotta tell ya, that was fucking awesome!”

Cas giggled and replied, “Yes. She is extremely talented.”

Dean nodded in agreement. “So, I’m ready for the check.” He looked at the time. “You wanna walk to the theater? We have plenty of time.”

Cas shrugged and said, “Sure. Gotta work off the calories from this meal somehow.”

Dean wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “I can think of a couple of things we can do that would burn off the calories of this meal.”

Cas blushed. “If we didn’t have another place to be, I would say yes. However, if you recall, we have a previous engagement to get to soon.”

After letting out a sarcastic sigh, Dean beamed at the man he loved and said, “There is always later.”

If it were possible, Cas’ face flushed a little deeper before he bit his bottom lip and glanced over at Dean. “I would very much like that.”

Dean swallowed hard.  _ Did he just? _ He raised his hand until he caught Brie’s attention. “Check!”

 

>>>>>>

 

At first, Castiel was pissed watching their server make goo-goo eyes at Dean, but eventually, he realized it was all a set-up for what Brie had planned for her performance. Or at least, that’s what he told himself as he left her a twenty-five percent tip, then exited the restaurant.

The city was still just as crowded as when they entered Ellen’s. People pushed into them as they walked down Broadway hand-in-hand. Yet, as those rude New Yorkers passed by without a care or a sorry, Castiel felt an overwhelming feeling of joy just being there with Dean. Something as trivial as holding Dean’s hand put a smile on his face that he hoped would never disappear. No matter how much of a dorky sap it made him look.

They didn’t stop anywhere on the way to the theater. They did, however, take a picture, the typical tourist trap picture in Times Square to commemorate their first trip into the city together.  _ Knowing how amazing Raised From Perdition is, it won’t be long before they’re booking gigs in the city again. I would love to see them perform again sometime soon. _

With that thought in mind, Castiel turned to Dean outside of Hayes theater and asked, “When are you and the band performing again?”

“Um, we haven’t booked anything recently,” Dean responded cautiously. “I was figuring we could hit up a local place after the Disney trip. Why?”

Castiel shrugged. “I was just thinking that I would love to come back to the city with you sometime and you performing somewhere here would be a perfect excuse to come back soon.”

Dean shot Castiel a crooked smile. “You enjoying yourself that much?”

Once again, Castiel shrugged. “I always saw myself eventually living here actually. Here or maybe Boston.”

Dean’s eyes widened. “Why Boston?”

“It’s beautiful there. Have you ever been?”

“No. I have no urge. Sammy wants to go to Massachusetts to see the Lizzy Borden house eventually, but I’ve never had an urge to go up there. I’ve always heard Maine is nice though.”

“York, Maine is gorgeous. I loved their beach.”

“Big fan of the northeast, huh?”

Castiel nodded adamantly. “Yes. I have visited every state in the northeast. I find it to be wonderful here.”

“Ever been out west?”

“I visited my cousin Michael in Los Angeles. I have seen the Grand Canyon as well as Las Vegas. However, I prefer the northeast,” Castiel declared.

“Kansas is nice from what I remember.”

Castiel’s eyebrows raised in interested. “Plan on moving to Kansas.”

Dean shrugged noncommittally. “Maybe. Someday. It’s quiet there.”

Unfortunately, they didn’t get a chance to finish their conversation because the theater opened its doors to let people  finally  take their seats.

“Do you want anything?” Dean asked as he looked at the concession stand.

“We just ate. How on earth are you hungry right now?”

“What?” Dean snapped. “I’m not allowed to look? I’m sure I’m gonna want something during intermission at least.”

Castiel gave him what he knew was a bitchface, then replied, “Was the attitude truly necessary? I asked a logical question considering we just had a big meal.”

After Dean took a deep breath, he gave Castiel an apologetic look. “I’m sorry. I’m just nervous.”

“About what?”

“Our seats.”

Castiel playfully smacked him on the arm. “Oh, shut up and let’s go sit.”

The theater wasn’t massive. Compared to the Gershwin, New Amsterdam, and the Minskoff theaters, the Hayes theater was a hole in the wall. Still, Castiel had heard amazing things about the musical and the music was perfect for Dean.

They really did have some amazing seats. The show was spectacular. Every single character brought something to the stage. By the intermission, both Dean and Castiel were at the edge of their seats wondering what was yet to come.

At intermission, Dean did end up going to grab a drink. He complained the entire time about how expensive the beer was, but he told Castiel that he had to buy a bottle just for the novelty of it all.

When the show was over, the entire theater gave the cast a standing ovation.

As they exited the theater and started walking back towards Penn Station, Castiel laced his hand with Dean’s. When their eyes met, Dean smiled sweetly at Castiel. “I had an amazing time tonight.”

“As did I,” Castiel said as he planted a lingering kiss on Dean’s lips. The kiss spoke of promises for later. However, they had a train to catch. Their kissing could wait until after they were safe and on their way home on the LIRR.

When they entered Penn Station, it wasn’t long before they were running to catch a halfway decent spot on the train. As soon as they found a secluded place with Dean in the back corner of one of the final cars, Castiel locked lips with Dean. For most of the train ride home, neither of them separated unless they were coming up for air. No one sat near them. In fact, Castiel was surprised that no one commented once about how inappropriate they were being. Their hands were all over each other. Their lips and tongues tasted more than just each other's mouths on more than one occasion. Mind you, their clothing did remain on, but they were far from PG as they devoured each other on the train.

Once they arrived at the station, the only question Castiel needed answering was whose house they were going to be spending the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The server I used is an actual person. Look her up on youtube. Total eclipse of the heart is my favorite.


	51. Chapter Fifty-One

There were other occasions where Dean had made out with someone on the train. On all of those other occasions, Dean never had an overwhelming need to throw caution to the wind and break every indecent exposure law  imaginable.

Cas was all over Dean. Not that the same couldn’t have been said for Dean with Cas, but Castiel was particularly daring when it came to the public displays of their affection. Dean felt as if Cas’ hands were everywhere at once. They were under his shirt, grabbing his hair, rubbing against his rock hard erection. He was surprised the guy who was checking tickets didn’t tell them to get off of the train. _The expensive as fuck uber or taxi ride would have been worth it._

As soon as they were off of the train, Cas turned to him and asked, “Yours or mine?”

To be honest, Dean hadn’t planned that far ahead. Most of his thoughts had been about needing and wanting Cas that exact moment. “Uh,” he stammered.

“Let’s go to your place again. You just have to make sure we’re up early enough so I can make it to the library on time,” Cas said before he grabbed Dean’s hand and they made their way towards the parking garage.

Once they were in the car, Cas was all over him again.

“Cas, I gotta pay for the day in the garage. We’ll be back at my house within the next ten minutes. I’m begging you to wait. Please”

Cas gave him the most adorable pout, then huffed out a sigh. “Fine.”

The ride back to Dean’s house took less than the promised ten minutes. As the garage door closed, Cas climbed into Dean’s lap and started to take off his layers of clothing. “You know. I love this car,” Cas said between kisses.

Dean smirked as he let Cas take off his sweater. “Really? Why?”

“It holds some spectacular firsts for me. Plus, you look sexy as fuck driving it,” Cas explained with love in his eyes as he took a good look at Dean.

Before Cas could lean in for another kiss, Dean swallowed hard and asked, “Is it about to hold another first for you Cas?”

A devilish smile spread across Cas’ face as he snaked his hand into Dean’s pocket and brought out the lube packets and condom he had taken earlier. “I don’t know, Dean,” he snarked with a crooked grin. “What were you planning earlier that made you decide to take these with you?”

Dean just shrugged, then replied, “Was I wrong?”

This time, Cas was the one who swallowed hard. “You know, Dean...” He looked down at the packets in his hand. “Technically this won’t be my first time.”All of the humor that was in Cas’ eyes moments before was gone and his smile was replaced with a grimace.

Dean lifted his hand to cup Cas’ cheek. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, Cas. If you want…” Dean paused. _Am I about to do this?_ He took a deep breath. “I mean, I’ve never done it before, but if you want, I could…”

Cas silenced him with a kiss. “I love you.”

“So… is that a yes?”

“Are you sure?”

Without second guessing himself, Dean nodded. “I trust you.”

Cas looked around. “Do you wanna go inside?”

“Why?”

“Well, it’s sort of cold out here.”

“Bobby and Sam are home.”

Cas’ lips made a perfect “O,” then he nodded. “Backseat it is.”

Dean took a second to look both of them over. “Are we going to do the same thing as last time? Strip outside, then dash into the car?”

“Yeah, but let’s put our clothes inside the car this time. They were freezing last time.”

“Good idea,” Dean agreed.

With that plan in mind, both of them got out of the car and stripped down to their boxers. After they were done undressing, they put their clothing in balls in the front seat, then crawled into the back seat.

At any minute, Dean was sure he was bound to watch his heart beat out of his chest it was pounding so hard. The butterflies in his stomach were flying out of control. _Shit, this is seriously about to happen._

Cas’ eyebrows furrowed as he did his signature head tilt. “Are you okay?”

Dean gulped with a nod. “Yeah. Just nervous I guess.”

Cas put down the lube and condoms. “If we’re moving too fast, we can stop if you would like.”

Dean picked the items up and placed them in Cas’ hand. “I want this. I want you.”

“I don’t want to pressure you, Dean. If you’re not ready for penetrative sex, I don’t want to force this.”

“I’m ready. It’s big, but I’m ready.”

“I told you, I’m far from little.”

Dean chuckled. “Not what I meant, angel. But yes, you’re far from little.”

Cas leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on Dean’s lips. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Dean replied with a crooked smile before he kissed Cas back.

The kiss quickly turned heated as it always did. Their tongues were colliding with one another as they deepened the kiss. Soon, Cas’ body was draped over Dean’s. Their mouths were only separating to place little kisses or nibbles on the other’s neck or jawline.

Within no time, kissing was no longer enough. Cas trailed his tongue down to Dean’s nipple and quickly latched onto it.

“Fuck, yes!” Dean exclaimed as Cas’ hand wandered into his boxers to stroke his length to full-hardness. As Cas’ talented mouth tormented Dean’s nipple, Dean began to feel the familiar burn of desire slowly burning in his loins. He knew it was only a matter of time before he would explode. “Oh, shit!” he hissed as he threw his head back in ecstasy.

Until the day he dies, Dean will deny the whimper that came out of his mouth when Cas removed his sweet mouth away from him to rid them of their useless underwear.

“Why did we leave our boxers on?” Cas inquired with a perplexed expression.

“I have no idea,” Dean panted out.

After both of their boxers were shed, Cas draped his body back over Dean’s to steal a sloppy, yet perfect, kiss. Once Cas seemed to have his fill of kisses, he once again trailed his tantalizing mouth and tongue down to his desired location. This time, his mouth didn’t stop at Dean’s nipples. He continued down until he placed a kiss on the head of Dean’s cock. He let his tongue delve into the slit before he engulfed it into his hot, wet mouth.

Dean was in heaven. He loved watching Cas’ mouth stretch around his girth. He grabbed hold of the seats for dear life as he tried to maintain some form of composure. Of course, it was impossible, but he tried.

Suddenly, the warmth of Cas’ mouth was gone. Dean never wanted it to stop, but he knew what was next before Cas said a word.

“Do you prefer to stay as you are or do you want to roll over?” Cas asked, his voice wrecked with arousal.

“I need to be prepped first, so I should probably roll over.”

Cas’ eyebrows furrowed as his head tilted to the right. “Excuse me?”

“Lube and stretching, man.”

A pinkish hue stained Cas cheeks as he blushed. “I’m sorry. I’m nervous.”

“I can prep myself if you want,” Dean suggested.

Cas shook his head adamantly. “No. I can do it.”

Without another word, Dean rolled over and got on his hands and knees in the back seat. It was somewhat cramped, but there was no way they were going to take their activities elsewhere at that point.

Dean felt overly exposed as he was nearly presenting himself to Cas in the back seat. He lowered the front half of his body until it was up against the still warm leather of the backseat, then spread his legs apart to give Cas easier access.

A gentle hand caressed Dean’s back as Cas placed a single kiss on one of the globes of his ass. “Beautiful.”

Dean blushed at the sentiment. _Beautiful, huh?_ The car went completely silent as one of the packages of lube was opened. _Next time I gotta buy a little bottle._ Luckily, the condom was a lubed one, so they would probably be okay with the two packets he had brought with him.

When the lube started to pour onto him, Dean jumped. It wasn’t cold, but it surprised the fuck out of him.

“You okay?” Cas asked, his voice laced with concern.

“Just surprised me is all,” Dean comforted.

“We don’t have to if…”

“I’m fine, Cas. I swear.”

Thankfully, Cas didn’t question again. He teased Dean’s pucker with his thumb causing chills of pleasure to radiate through Dean’s body.

When Cas’ pointer finger slid home, Dean took in a hissed breath and tried his hardest to remain calm. He knew from what others had told him, stressing out and locking up was the last thing you wanted to do. It would only make it hurt.

Cas squirted some more lube onto Dean as he twisted and twirled his finger around. As Cas added a second finger, he hooked them and rubbed up against Dean’s prostate.

“Holy fuck!” Dean moaned.

“Good?”

“Yes. Keep going,” Dean begged.

The torturess pleasure continued as Cas began to scissor open Dean’s hole. Every couple of strokes, Cas would rub up against Dean’s prostate sending bolts of lightning throughout his body. When a third finger finally slid in, Dean thought he was going to explode. He had never felt such a thrill.

“Are you ready?” Cas asked, his voice thick with arousal.

“Will you shut up and a fuck me already? I’m dying over here.”

The sound of the condom wrapper rustling echoed through the car, then Dean felt him. At first, there was a stinging discomfort and a little pressure from the initial push past the tight ring of muscle. Then, he felt as if he was being split open on Cas’ monstrosity of a cock. “Oh, fuck.”

Cas paused as he entered Dean. “You’re so fucking tight.”

“Yeah. That’s cause you’re so huge.”

Cas chuckled deeply, then grew serious. “Are you okay?”

“If you ask me that one more time, Cas, I swear.”

Cas continued to push in until his hips made contact with Dean’s ass.

Breathing was tricky for Dean. The pain-pleasure he was feeling from the incredible size of Cas' dick was beyond anything he could have imagined.

“Are…” Cas took a shaky breath. “Are you ready?”

Dean nodded. “Yes.”

Cas pulled out, then ever so slowly pushed back in. “Oh, my God.”

“Cas? I need you to move.”

Once again Cas pulled out, but this time he slammed back into Dean. “Like this?”

Dean whimpered in ecstasy. “Fuck.”

“Did I hurt you?”

“NO! Just fuck me.”

Apparently, Cas didn’t have to be told again. The rhythm he developed was close to leisurely at first, but then it became punishing. Every thrust drove Dean forward and closer to the car door. He knew he should be worried about being slammed into the door head first, but he couldn’t find a reason to care at that moment, especially when Cas started smacking his ass.

“Yes! Spank me.” The next smack was even harder and timed perfectly with a thrust that nailed his prostate. “FUCK!!!”

“You like it rough?”

Dean couldn’t answer. He was beyond this earth. He was somewhere near heaven with the absolute pleasure he was feeling.

Without warning, Cas grabbed Dean’s hair, draping his body over him as he whispered, “I asked you a question.”

The only sounds Dean could make was “Uh… uh… uh,” as Cas nailed his prostate over and over again.

Cas laughed lightly. “I’ll take that as a yes.” Then, out of nowhere, Cas pulled out.

“Why are you stopping?” Dean whined.

Cas rolled Dean over and said as he held his gaze, “I want to watch you. From the other position, it is quite impossible to do so.”

Dean nodded.

Cas cupped Dean’s cheek and kissed him lightly before he once again entered Dean. Cas lifted Dean’s knees to his chest and pushed himself in deeper until he completely bottomed out inside of him.

Dean’s eyes rolled into the back of his head as Cas started to thrust into him like a piston. When Cas changed his angle and once again found Dean’s prostate, Dean wasn’t sure how much longer he could last. He wrapped his legs tightly around Cas and pulled him closer. The friction of their bodies rubbing together was Dean’s undoing. "Oh, fuck. Fuck me harder, Cas! I’m cumming!” he screamed as he finally did cum untouched between them.

Cas continued to fuck into Dean as he coated them both in steady hot, white streams of cum. Dean had never came so hard in his life and it felt as if it were never-ending. Cas’ rhythm became erratic as he, too, came screaming Dean’s name, then collapsed on top of Dean thoroughly spent.

Dean’s legs unwound from around Cas and fell like jelly onto the seat. _That was the best sex I’ve ever had._

 

>>>>>>

 

It was more incredible than he ever imagined it could be. At first, he was worried about disappointing Dean, but from what he could tell he had nothing to worry about. When Cas felt his breathing start to even out a bit, he pulled his softening cock out of Dean and reached under the front seat for the paper towels and wipes he knew he would find there.

Dean continued to lie there on his back, breathing heavily, until he had burst out, “You’ve ruined me.”

Concern instantly gave him pause. He sat back abandoning his search for the paper towels and wipes. “Are you okay?” He searched Dean. Nothing seemed to be wrong. “Did I hurt you?”

“You hurt me in the best fucking way if that was what hurting me is,” he said with a smile.

Castiel chuckled. “I’m happy you enjoyed yourself, then.” He took off the condom, tied a knot, then continued his search for the cleaning supplies. When his hand finally landed on them, he took a piece of paper towel and wrapped the condom in it.

“Are you sure that was your first time? Where did you learn to fuck like that?”

Castiel continued to smile as he began to clean himself off. “You know I have watched porn before, right?” Dean was leaning on his elbows smiling at him.

“Oh? So, porn is to blame for that?” Dean asked as he leaned on his elbows motioning he wanted a paper towel.

“Yeah. I learned that from the pizza man,” he replied with a wicked grin.

Dean grabbed some of the paper towels and started to wipe himself off. “Well, A plus for you.”

Castiel laughed. “You’re grading me now?”

“Do you want a prize or something? I could tell you that you did a good job and give you a cookie or something.” He grabbed the container of wipes and started to clean his chest.

“Hmm, you see, seeing you do that? That’s my prize.” Castiel ate up the site in front of him.

“Kinky son of a bitch,” Dean replied as he leaned in and kissed him.

“You know it,” Castiel agreed with a wink.

After they were thoroughly cleaned up and cum-free, the two of them cuddled up against each other in the back seat. “We’re gonna need to go inside soon. You know that, right?” Castiel mentioned.

A small grin broke across Dean’s face. “I’m getting right to that,” he said as he wrapped his arms around Castiel tighter and kissed his neck.

“Dean,” Castiel tried and failed to sound stern. “We need to go inside. It’s freezing outside. It’s bound to get unbearable inside the car eventually. I’m surprised it hasn’t already.”

Dean pouted but conceded to the fact that Castiel was right.

They both got dressed quickly. Thankfully, their clothing wasn’t as cold as last time they did something in the car. _Good idea asking him to leave everything in the car._ As soon as they were done getting dressed, the two of them shared a kiss, then made the short journey to the door that led through the kitchen.

Of course, neither of them were lucky enough for everyone to be asleep.

“Hello, lovebirds. Have fun tonight?” Bobby asked in greeting.

“I had a pretty fucking awesome night,” Dean answered first before Castiel could answer.

“What he said,” Castiel added.

Sam entered the room smirking. “Hmm, I bet.”

“Shut up, ya idjit. They’re happy and legal consenting adults,” Bobby admonished.

Sam threw his hands up in surrender. “I’m going back to my room to play _Fortnite._ Apparently, Bobby doesn’t think I should give you a ration of shit for the noises we heard coming from the garage for the past hour.”

“Sam!” Bobby and Dean barked.

Castiel just blushed. _We were loud, weren’t we? We need to learn volume control._

“Come on. Let’s get away from the moody teenager.”

“You were loud as fuck! You don’t want comments, then quiet the fuck down!” Sam shouted after them as they left to go to Dean’s room.

Once they were safely behind the locked door of Dean’s room, Cas wrapped his arms around Dean and said, “I’ll try to keep it down next time.”

“It wasn’t you who was loud and you know it. I gotta turn down the fucking volume.”

“Or you could buy a big house someday where we wouldn’t have to worry about being too loud.”

“Or we can get a hotel room and fuck like bunnies and no one would care.”

Castiel cocked an eyebrow at Dean. “Like where?”

“Commack Motor Inn,” Dean said with a shrug.

Cas wrinkled his nose in disgust. “I’ve heard about that place. People take hookers there, Dean. I am not a hooker.”

“Well, they’re not expensive. That’s why I mentioned them.”

“No, Dean,” Cas snapped. “We can control our volume, right?”

“Fuck me like that again and no. I won’t be able to,” Dean admitted. “You’re incredible.”

Cas blushed yet again.

“I love how you just pounded my ass like a pornstar and you’re blushing. I love you,” Dean said with a laugh.

“I love you, too, but I have work in the morning. We both have to get up early so I can get there in time.”

Dean pouted but nodded his head in understanding. “Okay”

Castiel fired off a quick text to his mom letting her know where he was, then stripped down to nothing before he crawled into Dean’s bed.

When Dean saw the chosen attire for their bedtime, he was more than a little excited to do the same.

“Down, boy. We have to go to bed,” Cas chastised.

Dean made an exaggerated frown, then crawled into the bed next to him. “Party pooper.”

“You love me.”

“Always.”

Even though it may have seemed silly, Castiel was nervous about the morning after. From what he could tell, Dean enjoyed the experience. Bobby and Sam could attest to that. Still, considering all of the horror stories he has always heard about the morning after, Castiel was afraid.

When the first bit of light started to shine through Dean’s window, Castiel awoke to Dean softly snoring on Castiel’s chest. He had to pee, but the way that Dean looked he didn’t want to wake him. Soon, however, the physical need to relieve himself was too much.

At first, Castiel tried to gently remove Dean from his chest, but Dean wasn’t having it. He grabbed hold of Castiel a little tighter in his sleep. The peaceful expression Dean had been wearing only a few moments prior, changed into a grimace as he whined in his sleep.

_Well, that’s not going to work._

Next, Castiel tried to get Dean to take a pillow instead, but inevitably that woke him up.

“Why are you up?” Dean grumbled.

“I have to use the bathroom.”

Dean snuggled up closer to Castiel. “I was having the best dream.”

“What was it about?”

Dean lifted his head and smiled. “Come back from the bathroom and maybe we can make it come true,” he said with a wink.

Cas cocked an eyebrow at Dean. “You were just complaining that I woke you.”

Dean shrugged, then stretched while rolling onto his back. His cock standing at attention. “Well, now that I’m up, I’m up. Get it?”

Castiel shook his head with a crooked smile. “You’re funny.”

“And adorable,” Dean said with another wink.

“And adorable,” Castiel agreed as he rolled his eyes.

“Hurry up, I want my dream to become a reality sometime today. Preferably this morning.”

With that, Castiel hopped out of the bed, threw on a pair of pajama pants, and sped off to the bathroom. As he was washing his hands, he decided to brush his teeth. _Morning breath is a serious turnoff._ When he returned to the room, Dean was once again asleep.

Even though Castiel was disappointed that Dean fell asleep, he couldn’t help but take a moment to marvel at the beautiful man laying on the bed before him. There wasn’t a stitch on him. The sheets were crumpled up at the bottom of the bed leaving every gorgeous inch bare for Castiel to see. _How did I get so lucky?_

Slowly, Castiel approached the bed. He didn’t want to wake Dean from what was sure to be a continuation of his previous dream. As he crawled up to the top of the bed, temptation got the best of him and he licked the tip of Dean’s cock.

Dean responded with an appreciative moan. “I was wondering when you would get back.”

“Sorry, I brushed my teeth,” Castiel explained as he finished his journey up to Dean. As soon as he was able to, he planted a kiss on Dean’s lips.

The kiss morphed into something more primal within a matter of seconds. When Dean rolled on top of Castiel, Cas’ hands traveled down to Dean’s ass and separated the cheeks to expose Dean’s tight hole.

Dean broke the kiss and hissed, “Shit.”

Castiel’s hands dropped off of Dean instantly. “Did I hurt you?”

“I’m just sore,” Dean admitted. “You fucked me harder than I thought.”

“My apologies.”

Dean leaned down and kissed Castiel with a light brush of his lips. “Don’t apologize for sex, ever.”

“It was life-affirming.”

Dean threw his head back with a laugh. “Don’t brag.”

Castiel began to trail tiny kisses from Dean’s left ear down to his clavicle. “Didn’t you say you had a dream you’d like reenact?”

“Yes,” Dean moaned.

Castiel sucked Dean’s nipple into his mouth drawing a groan from Dean’s sinful lips. “Shouldn’t we take care of that?”

Dean licked his lips, then growled, “Fuck the dream. Any reality with you in it is better.”

The kiss that followed that statement stole Castiel’s breath. He wanted to be inside of Dean again, but he knew that would have to wait until Dean was no longer sore. Even though he now knew how incredible it felt to be buried deep inside Dean’s ass, Castiel would never rush him. He would, however, take every chance to grope and grab at everything he could, especially since Dean was rolling his hips in the most delicious way.

“If you don’t stop, I’m going to cum,” Castiel warned as he tried to catch his breath.

Dean swiftly licked Castiel’s lips. “That’s the idea, angel,” Dean panted as he also tried to breathe.

 _I’m not cumming without him._ Castiel forced his hand between the two of them and began to stroke Dean’s already weeping cock.

“Oh, fuck! Yes!” Dean growled as he continued to grind up against Cas.

It wasn’t long before of them cumming all over each other. Castiel was the one who was hit the most by the mess of cum, part in his pants, the other part on his chest, but luckily, Dean kept paper towels in his room. So, Castiel was able to clean up most of the mess. Of course, a shower is really what he needed, but Dean, even though he knew he would hate to admit it was a cuddler. After an orgasm, Dean would always reach for Castiel to just hold him and press the gentlest of kisses to anywhere he could reach. Eventually, the sun was high enough in the winter sky that it was time for Castiel to get ready to leave so he could go home and get ready for work.

As they dressed, they threw each other shy smiles. It was funny. Even after everything they had done to each other, everything felt brand new after last night. Every touch, if it were possible, was filled with more electricity. Every kiss was even more magnetizing. Nothing would make Castiel happier than to spend the day having sex, then holding Dean for as long as he wanted, but work was important. He couldn’t miss it.

They left the house just before eight and arrived at Castiel’s house shortly after. When they arrived, Castiel tried his hardest not to deepen the goodbye kiss. He craved the intimacy. He craved the taste of Dean’s mouth, but he knew he had a schedule to keep to, so he made the kiss as short and sweet as possible.

“I love you, Cas.”

“Promise?” asked with a smile.

“Of course,” Dean chuckled.

With one final kiss, Castiel was out of the car and on his way to the front door. As soon as he entered the house and went downstairs, he was greeted by his brother. Arms crossed over his chest with a knowing smile.

“You smell like sex,” Gabriel stated with a grin.

“I’d rather you not smell me, Gabriel.”

“I’d rather not smell you, too, little bro, but the fact of the matter is you reek.”

Try as he might, Castiel couldn’t wipe the smile from his face to chastise his brother. “Well, I better go take a shower, then,” he said with a skip in his step as he walked away.

“You lost your V-card last night, didn’t you?” Gabriel inquired as he followed Castiel to his room.

All Castiel did was glance over his shoulder and widen his grin.

“Holy shit! You did!” Gabriel shrieked as he followed Castiel to his room.

“Gabriel, I would prefer to not discuss this with you, so if you don’t mind I have to get ready for work,” he said as he entered his room and made an attempt to close the door behind him.

Gabriel stuck his foot in front of the door and pushed his way inside. “Nuh-uh, you’re not getting away that easy.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. _God, why?_ “I don’t plan on answering any of your questions, so I don’t know why you’re bothering.”

“I just want to know one thing.”

Castiel huffed out a deep breath. “What?” he asked as he faced his brother.

“Are you okay?”

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Better than okay.”

“So, he was gentle?”

“Gabriel,” Castiel growled. “I’m not discussing my sex life with you.”

Gabriel’s jaw dropped. “Oh, my God. You’re the top in the relationship?!?!”

Castiel pointed his finger at his door. “Get out.”

Gabriel held his hands up in surrender. His face covered in a shit-eating grin. “Just one more thing before I go.”

“What?”

“I’m happy for you, little bro,” Gabriel answered with a smile.

Castiel beamed at his older brother. “Thanks.”

Throughout the rest of the day, Castiel couldn’t remove the smile off of his face even if he tried. No matter how strangely people looked at him. No matter what kind of dirty looks he received, Castiel was for once perfectly happy. Considering what he had gone through in the past, he knew it was best to hold on tight to whatever happiness he felt. He never knew what tomorrow could bring.


	52. Chapter Fifty-Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot believe I have been writing this monstrosity for over a year now. I'm so thankful for all of my readers and the patience you have shown as I post week after week. I finally have an ending in sight. I hope to finish it soon, but writing is not always easy. I hope you have enjoyed what I have posted so far. Thank you so much for reading.

The beginning of February was starting to feel exactly like the beginning of October for Dean. With the school’s marching band trip to Disney fast approaching, Dean had a lot on his plate. Of course, making sure all of his school work was finished was important, but he did find himself spending an enormous amount of his free time at the high school. Not that spending time there was a bad thing. He was able to see Cas more often, as well as he had a chance to spend time with some of his favorite people in the music department.

Another great thing about being so close to the school again was he was able to keep a close eye on Cas. Alastair seemed to be keeping his distance which was unnerving. Dean and everyone else for that matter spent a significant amount of time worrying about what Alastair’s next move was going to be. So, being close to the school again eased some of Dean’s worry. He knew if anything were to happen, he would be there.

After school let out, Dean would find himself with either the marching band or the theater kids. Max and Dean were finally starting to get along again. Once he realized Max was an undeniable flirt with everyone, not just Cas, Dean began to ease up on the dirty looks. Still, he couldn't help but keep an eye on him.  _ Cas is mine. _

Since the trip to Disney took place at the same time as Valentine’s Day, Cas and Dean decided not to celebrate. Dean tried not to be disappointed when Cas suggested it. He knew that it was just another day, but he had actually made plans. Valentine’s Day was going to be during one of the days that the students kind of had free reign of Epcot. He made reservations in France and planned on taking him back to his room. Luckily, he wasn’t staying at the same hotel as the the band, so he knew that he and Cas wouldn’t be caught doing anything by one of the other students. However, it seemed like all of his planning was for naught since Cas didn’t want to celebrate.  _ We’re still having dinner. I don’t care what he says. _

When the day of the trip to Disney finally arrived, Dean showed up to MacArthur Airport bright and early with Sam in tow. He was scared shitless. Dean didn’t do planes. Nothing that substantially massive has any right being in the sky. As soon as he woke up that morning, he started with the line of internal questioning.  _ What if there is a bird strike and we have to land in the fucking ocean? What if there is a terrorist on the plane and the US Marshall is busy taking a nap? What if I have a heart attack and die on the flight? What if Sammy gets sick and I can’t help him? What if something happens with Cas?  _ More than once Sam had to punch him in the arm to set him back on track.  _ I’m going to die on this trip. I can feel it. _

After waving goodbye to Bobby, who dropped them off, they went through security, then rode the escalators up to where the rest of the students and teachers were already waiting. Cas hadn’t arrived yet. The previous night, before he left Cas’ house to go home, Dean asked Becky if she preferred to take Cas or if she was okay with Bobby picking him up. Becky was pretty adamant that she wanted to be the one to drop him off. Dean had no complaint, but he knew he would start to feel better once Cas was once again by his side.

As Sam and Dean approached the other students, he noticed that a lot of them weren’t there. Probably about two-thirds of the actual marching band was in attendance, two-fifths of the Kickline/Colorguard team was there, and nearly half of the orchestra was able to make it.

“Is this everyone?” Dean asked as he approached Ellen.

“Just about,” Ellen replied. “We haven’t done final roll call yet because the flight isn’t for another hour and a half, but this is pretty much all we have coming with us. Trips like this are expensive. Not everyone can afford it. Even with the discounted prices, it’s still costly.”

“Pfft, discounted prices,” Dean snarked. “You realize because I am not a student or a teacher on this trip I had to pay full price for fucking everything. Disney is not cheap. The hotel alone.”

“Where are you staying again?” Ellen inquired.

“The Wilderness Lodge,” Sam answered for him.

Ellen cocked an eyebrow at Dean. “Mighty pricey. Any reason why you decided to go with that one?”

Dean swallowed hard and lied. “It’s got some great reviews.”

Ellen shook her head with a knowing smirk. “Uh-huh. The fact the place is gorgeous and it’s Valentine’s Day tomorrow has nothing to do with it.”

Sam chortled. “Yeah, nothing to do with it, right, Dean?”

Dean’s face flushed a bright ride as he grimaced towards his feet. “He doesn’t want to celebrate with me,” Dean admitted to the two of them. “He said we'd be too busy to be caring about Valentine’s Day.”

Ellen began to rub soothing circles on his back. “I’m so sorry, hun. Did you make plans already?”

Dean nodded his head. “Yeah, I made reservations in France. Also, I did choose the Wilderness Lodge because it’s fucking gorgeous and I thought he would love it, but it was all for nothing. He doesn’t care about Valentine’s Day.”

“You obviously do. Did you tell him you care?”

Before Dean could answer, Sam cleared his throat and said, “So, when are we supposed to be performing tomorrow at Epcot?”

“Hello, everyone,” Cas greeted as he seemingly appeared out of nowhere.

Dean turned towards Cas and gave him a quick hug. “Hello, Dean,” Cas whispered, sending a chill down Dean’s spine.

Dean would have liked nothing more than to claim in front of everyone with a searing kiss, but he knew it was inappropriate. Even if the band teachers and Ellen knew about their relationship, Ms. Lenore Upír, the orchestra teacher, didn’t know, as well as most of the students. So, kissing was out of the question. “Hiya, Cas.”

Cas was the first to break the hug as he reached out for a hug from Ellen, then Sam.

Surprisingly enough, Charlie gave Dean a big hug. She too seemed to appear out of nowhere, which, of course, he addressed.

“Where the fuck did you come from?” Dean questioned.

Charlie put her hands on her hips as she plopped her bag on the floor. “Well, it’s great to see you, too, Dean.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “What I mean is, you appeared out of thin air.”

“Becky dropped me off with Cas. He lives close enough that my parents agreed it would be a good idea for her to take me. To be honest, I was surprised when I didn’t see you pull into the driveway,” Charlie replied.

“I asked Becky if she was okay with Bobby picking him up and taking him with us, she said no. She was pretty adamant about taking him, too.”

“She wanted to make sure I was alright before she sent me off,” Cas divulged. “She’s always worried about me. I told her a million times there is nothing to worry about. I mean I’m going to be surrounded by teachers, parents, and students this entire trip. So, there is nothing to worry about.”

“She’s your mom, sweetie,” Ellen stated. “She’s always going to worry about you. There’s nothing you can do about that.”

“I guess,” Cas said with a shrug.

“Let’s go sit,” Charlie suggested, then skipped off to sit with Max and Alicia.

Cas waved goodbye awkwardly at Sam, Ellen, and Dean, then walked off with Charlie.

“Lord help me, I still want to smack her for what happened with my daughter,” Ellen grumbled. “Jo still cries over it.”

“I know. She’s messaged me more than once about it,” Dean added. “Every time I’m with Cas, I feel like I’m getting a message from her about Charlie. Just because they’re best friends, doesn’t mean they spend every second together. Most of the time, it’s just the two of us.”

“Jo really loved her. I don’t think she’ll ever get over what happened. I know they weren’t together when Charlie did what she did, but it still hurt my little girl.”

“You never know,” Sam started, “they may end up together again. I know how miserable Charlie is without her. She regrets ever going to that party.”

Ellen crossed her arms over her chest. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Sam confirmed with a nod. “She said and I quote ‘It was the biggest mistake I have ever made and I’ve made plenty.’”

Dean nudged Sam. “Well, I know one person who would say the party wasn’t a mistake.”

Sam blushed. “Shut up.”

“Oh, come on. You two are adorable. Did you know he is learning how ASL just for Eileen? Checked out a book at the library and everything,” Dean shared with a smile. He was honestly happy for his little brother. He deserved a great girl. From what he could tell, Eileen was precisely that.

“Shut up, Dean,” Sam huffed, then stomped off in the direction of their flight.

The next hour and a half was absolute torture. It was one thing being home and worrying about a flight. It was another thing altogether having to sit there in the airport and wait for the airplane to arrive and take him to his destination. Cas tried his best to comfort Dean, but unfortunately, the kind of comfort he needed from him was entirely out of the question. For one, it was the airport and secondly, they were surrounded by students.  _ The mile high club is out of the question, too. _

As they boarded the plane, Dean was sweating bullets. The fact that he was about to spend the next almost three hours on a plane made him want to turn around and book it back through the jet bridge back to the airport terminal. When he finally reached his seat, he gripped the armrests with all of his might and started to hum to drown out the sound of the massive engines.

Sam took his seat next to Dean. “You’re humming Metallica?”

Dean glared at his brother. “It calms me down.”

“Look, I know you’re nervous, but if you’re gonna be humming the entire flight, I’m gonna switch spots with Cas.”

“What about me?” Cas asked as he approached their seat.

“Aren’t you sitting up front more?” Dean questioned.

“It’s  _ Southwest _ , Dean. They really don’t care where I sit.”

_ Oh, yeah… Right. _

“Yeah, plus, you look like shit,” Sam commented.

The same glare he had shot Sam before returned. “Thanks, Sammy. Like I didn’t already know that, you turd!”

“Sam, come sit with us,” Ellen said as she approached the three of them. “You’re not helping him by making comments like that.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Fine.” He stood up and moved two rows ahead of Dean and Cas.

“Why don’t you move to the window seat?” Cas suggested. “Believe it or not, I think it will help.”

Dean raised an eyebrow at his boyfriend, giving him his most skeptical expression. “I’m afraid of heights too, Cas. That’s part of the problem. What makes you think the ability to see how high I am will help?”

“Do you trust me?” Cas asked.

“Of course, I do, but I…” Dean paused, taking a deep breath. “Okay, fine.” He pointed his finger at Cas. “But if I start having a mild panic attack because of it, I blame you.”

Cas rolled his eyes. “You’ll be fine.”

 

>>>>>>

 

“MOM!!!” Castiel hollered to get Becky’s attention. “I don’t want to be late. We still have to pick up Charlie! Will you stop fussing over every little thing so we can leave?”

Becky crossed her arms over her chest. “Whether you like it or not, you’re still my baby and I worry about you.”

“Laying on this guilt a little thick, aren’t we?” Gabriel asked as he exited his room, lollipop already in his mouth.

“Isn’t it a little early for candy?” Becky questioned with a disapproving look.

“Never too early for candy, ma,” Gabriel replied with a smirk.

Castiel threw his hands up. “I give up. I’m going to miss my flight. Everyone is going to wonder where I am and…”

“By ‘everyone’ you mean Dean, right?” Gabriel inquired with a wicked grin.

“Shut up!” Castiel snapped.

“Gabriel, leave your brother alone. He can’t help that he’s head over heels for the boy,” Becky said with a mischievous smile.

“I hate the both of you,” Castiel grumbled, wishing he could just go to his room and hide.

Becky put her hands up in surrender. “We’re just messing with you, Castiel.” She walked over to him and wrapped an arm around him. “I’m happy you found Dean. He’s just as in love with you as you are with him.”

Castiel’s face flushed. “Mom,” he whined.

Becky clapped her hands together. “Alright, are we all set and ready to go?”

Castiel rolled his eyes for the millionth time that morning. “Yes. Like I told you almost an hour ago, I was ready last night. I only needed a shower. You’re the one who insisted on repacking for me.”

After sticking her tongue out at him, she grabbed his bag and started heading towards the stairs.

“A-plus maturity, Mom,” Gabriel snarked. “Well, little bro, I will see you in about a week.”

Castiel gave his brother a quick hug, then chased after his mom to get to the car.

On the way, they quickly picked up Charlie. Luckily, Charlie didn’t seem to notice how late they had been running. Then again, Castiel appeared to be the only one who had noticed. He was happy that the airport was so close to his house. It was literally less than ten minutes away. The flights were more expensive, but Laguardia and JFK were war zones. The last place he wanted to fly out of or into was one of them.

When they finally arrived at the airport, Castiel nearly sprinted out of the car. He almost forgot his bag. Thankfully, since they were flying  _ Southwest _ , Charlie and Castiel didn’t have to check in, so they headed straight to security after saying goodbye to Becky.

Security was moving too slow for Castiel’s tastes. He wanted to be with the rest of the band already.  _ Who are you kidding? You just want to see Dean. _ Ever since they had sex, Castiel had this overwhelming need to be near Dean. Yeah, the need wasn’t new, but it was more profound now that they had consummated their relationship. Every touch felt like a promise.

As soon as he saw Dean, Castiel’s breath hitched.  _ It’s not fair how beautiful he is. _ He wanted to run over to where he stood and kiss him like he had been dying to for the last twelve hours, but he knew better. Dean was supposed to be Mr. Winchester again, which, of course, meant no kissing, groping, lengthy stares, prolonged hugs, holding hands, or sex for the entirety of the trip.  _ And he wonders why I said no to Valentine’s Day. _

Castiel approached Ellen, Sam, and Dean, then said, “Hello, everyone.” When Dean’s eyes were finally on him, he couldn’t help himself. He had to hug him at least. “Hello, Dean,” he whispered. The chills that swept through Dean’s body were beyond noticeable.  _ Fuck, I want him. _

“Hiya, Cas,” Dean said as he hugged him back.

When Castiel broke their hug, there was heat in Dean’s eyes.

Charlie threw her arms around Dean before Castiel could really say anything more to him. “Where the fuck did you come from?” Dean asked, seemingly shocked by Charlie’s appearance.

Charlie’s bags fell to the floor as her hands met her hips. “Well, it’s great to see you, too, Dean.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “What I mean is, you appeared out of thin air.”

“Becky dropped me off with Cas. He lives close enough that my parents agreed it would be a good idea for her to take me. To be honest, I was surprised when I didn’t see you pull into the driveway,” Charlie replied.

“I asked Becky if she was okay with Bobby picking him up and taking him with us, she said no. She was pretty adamant about taking him, too.”

Castiel would have loved nothing more than to send the morning with his lover. He wanted to share kisses with him in the car on the way to the airport. Really what he wanted was another night of fucking under their belt, but his mom just had to see him off. “She wanted to make sure I was alright before she sent me off. She’s always worried about me. I told her a million times there is nothing to worry about. I mean I’m going to be surrounded by teachers, parents, and students this entire trip. So, there is nothing to worry about.”

“She’s your mom, sweetie,” Ellen stated. “She’s always going to worry about you. There’s nothing you can do about that.”

_ That’s precisely what she told me earlier today.  _ “I guess,” Castiel said with a shrug.

“Let’s go sit,” Charlie suggested, then skipped off towards a group of friends.

Castiel wanted to give Dean a proper goodbye, but instead, he waved at Sam, Ellen, and Dean, then followed Charlie to sit with Max and Alicia.

“Hello, gorgeous,” Max greeted.

Castiel cocked an eyebrow. “Dean is right over there. You do realize what he would do if he heard you say such things to me?”

“Speaking of Dean,” Alicia began, “Is he okay?”

Castiel glanced over his shoulder and took a moment to really look at Dean. His coloring was all off and there was a thin sheen of sweat coating every inch of skin that was visible. “He told me he doesn’t like to fly.” He gave Dean another once over. “From what I can tell, that wasn’t a lie.”

“He looks like he’s going to be sick,” Charlie added.

Castiel nodded in agreement. “I wish I could do something to help him.”

“I can think of one thing that would get his mind off of flying,” Max stated suggestively.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “I can’t do what you’re thinking and you know it.”

“Mile high club, honey. People do it all the time.”

Castiel pointed at himself, “Me, a high school student,” then he quickly pointed at Dean, “Him a student teacher.”

“So?” Max asked with a wicked grin.

Castiel punched Max in the arm. “Shut up.”

“You’ll thank me later when I turn out to be right,” Max said with a smirk.

Castiel couldn’t listen to another word. He walked away from the group and went to the bathroom. He was already hormonally challenged since he was a teenager. Every waking moment was filled with images of Dean being impaled by his massive cock. One of the more titillating memories he couldn’t seem to remove from his mind was one of their more recent showers. Dean begged for five minutes to be fucked. He closed his eyes and bit his bottom lip to keep his already half hard dick from growing to full length.

After rinsing his face with a bit of cold water, Castiel exited the bathroom. The more he thought about joining the mile-high-club, the more he was beginning to think it was a good idea. Another image of him fucking Dean up against the Impala popped into his head.  _ Get your mind out of the gutter, Shurley. _

To keep his mind off of sex, Castiel went to one of the stores to buy a bottle of water. While he was there, an obscenely priced pack of condoms stared him in the face. He wanted to tell them no, but his mind was already made up. He grabbed the box, then made his purchase.  _ Desperate times call for desperate measures. _

Castiel tried his best to comfort Dean while they waited. At one point, he sat down next to him and gave him some gummy bears. It made Dean smile for a moment, but nothing was better than the way his eyes lit up on the plane when Castiel said he would sit with him. He had originally planned on sitting closer to the front with Charlie, but the condoms burning a hole in his pocket stated he should be sitting elsewhere.

As soon as they were somewhat alone and Dean was sitting next to window, Castiel took off his jacket and got to work.

“What are you doing?” Dean asked.

Castiel feigned innocence. “You look like you need it more than I do,” he said as he draped it over Dean.

Dean’s eyes widened. “No, Cas. Don’t you dare,” he whispered.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I am not spending an almost three-hour flight covered in my own jizz, Cas!”

Castiel’s hand slipped into his back pocket and removed the condom packet he had placed there as soon as he made his decision.

“Like that is supposed to change my mind?” Dean questioned.

“It’ll help. I promise.”

“Cas…”

“Dean. You need help. Let me help you,” Castiel offered as his hand disappeared underneath the fabric of the jacket and made its way towards Dean’s crotch. Dean was already half-hard in his jeans. “Obviously, you’re a little more interested in the idea of this than you’re letting on.”

Dean glared at Castiel. “Not like I’ve never thought about it before, Cas. I think about doing everything with you.”

Castiel unbuttoned Dean’s pants, then slowly lowered the zipper as the plane took a tight turn on their way toward the runway.

“Fuck!” Dean muttered. “You’re going to get us arrested.”

“Not if you’re quiet,” he mumbled with a kiss to Dean’s cheek. He stroked him to full hardness then opened the condom wrapper and rolled it down his length as the captain let everyone on the plane know they had been cleared for take-off.

Castiel continued to stroke Dean as they sped down the runway. When they began to lift off of the ground, Dean’s left hand grasped Castiel’s knee and squeezed.

“Shhh, baby. Let go. Let yourself feel it,” Castiel demanded patiently as he continued to roughly stroke Dean’s dick underneath the cover of his jacket.

“Shit, angel. Don’t… stop… fuck.”

With a few more strokes, Dean was groaning out his orgasm. Castiel took a second to look around as he continued to stroke Dean through his orgasm. Still, not a single eye was on them.  _ For two people who receive constant noise complaints, this went extremely well. _

When Dean started to come down from his orgasm high, he lifted the jacket slightly to get a good view of what was going on underneath there and smiled. “You never fail to amaze me, Cas.”

Castiel beamed at his boyfriend. “You needed it.”

“Mm-hmm,” Dean hummed as he closed his eyes and nuzzled in close to Castiel. “Now, if only I could truly show my appreciation.”

“You should probably clean up.”

Dean’s eyes glanced up toward the fasten seatbelt light that was still brightly lit above them. “Can’t go right now,” he chuckled. He grimaced down at his crotch. “At least you were smart with the condom and all,” he whispered.

Castiel shrugged. “I knew sneaking off to the bathroom was out of the question, so I figured might as well try something different.”

“I love you,” Dean said with a crooked grin.

“I know. I love you, too.”

Eventually, the captain announced that people could use the restrooms if they needed to, so Dean was able to go and clean up. When he came back, they ordered their complimentary drinks and ate their tiny bags of pretzels. At some point, they fell asleep. They were awoken by the feeling of wheels hitting the tarmac of Orlando International Airport.  _ This should be an exciting trip. _


	53. Chapter Fifty-Three

The flight to Florida was one of the best airplane rides Dean could remember. Dean wasn’t stupid; he knew there was one major reason as to why it was, but he planned on going to the grave with that one. Or at least hang on to the memory until he had to one-up someone.  _ I have the best boyfriend in the whole fucking world. _

After they got onto their bus, Dean took a moment to marvel at where he was. Last time the school was invited to go to Disney, Dean had said no. Of course, he still sold the band candy like everyone else, but he was not one for plane rides. This time, knowing Sam and Cas would be going, Dean felt it was almost his duty to go. Three-hour plane ride or not, he knew there was no way he was going to pass up on this trip.

Once they arrived at the Pop Century Resort, one of Disney’s many hotels, Dean knew he had to say goodbye and make his way to his own hotel. Unfortunately, he had to take two buses to get there — one to the transportation ticket center, then another to the Wilderness Lodge.

The hotel was stunning. Dean didn’t usually splurge on extravagant things like this, but he knew that Cas would appreciate it when he joined him the next night. First of all, the building itself was massive. The woodwork was spectacular. The pool, even though he knew he wouldn’t be using it, was enormous and beautiful. Plus, the hotel itself was right on the water of one of Disney’s lakes.  _ Fuck this place is unbelievable. _

As soon as Dean finished checking in, and scoping the place out, he sat down and looked at his phone. He had a text from Sammy complaining about how hard the beds were at the hotel, a text from Ellen asking what Cas, Sam, and he planned on doing for dinner, and then, a text from Cas asking about his room.

**Dean: I can’t wait until you see this place, Cas. You’re gonna love it!**

**Cas: Who says I plan on going to your hotel room?**

**Dean: Tomorrow night after dinner. I thought I would show you around the hotel. ;)**

**Cas: *gasp* I am not that kind of boy, mister.**

**Dean: Haha. Says the guy who gave me a handjob on an airplane earlier today.**

**Cas: Pfft. I have no idea what you’re talking about. That must have been someone else.**

**Dean: Uh-huh. You’re the innocent one in this situation.**

**Cas: I’m an angel 0:)**

**Dean: You’re my angel <3**

**Cas: Always <3**

Always was a long time, but always didn’t scare Dean when it came to Cas.

**Dean: I love you.**

**Cas: I love you, too. See you later?**

**Dean: Where?**

**Cas: Disney Springs?**

**Dean: I’ll be there.**

 

**> >>>>>**

 

“What are you smiling about?” Jo asked as she perused the store in the hotel.

Castiel continued to beam at his cell phone. “Dean wants to meet up at Disney Springs later.”

Jo chuckled. “Plan on sneaking out or something?”

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “No. Why would I?”

“You realize you’re my mom’s responsibility, right? You can’t just up and go wherever you want.”

“I’ll just ask her if I can meet him there,” he said with a shrug.

Jo held a shirt up to herself. “What do you think of this one?” It was a pink shirt with the Spanish translation of the monorails automated saying “please stand clear of the doors” on it.

“I want it! Does it come in my size?”

Jo held up his size in black. “Got it.”

Castiel snatched the shirt from her hands, then said, “Thanks,” before he went over to the register.

Waiting for him at the register was Charlie.

“What are you doing over here?”

“I’m not being creepy.”

Castiel squinted at her in bemusement. “No one said you were being creepy.”

“Oh,” Charlie muttered as she glared down at her knotted fingers.

“Were you watching us?” Castiel inquired.

“Maybe…”

“Charlie, just go say sorry.”

Charlie shook her head vigorously. “No!”

“Why not?”

“Because she hates me.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. He glanced over in Jo’s direction. Jo quickly looked away. “She misses you just as much as you miss her.”

“You can’t know that,” Charlie said to her feet.

“I do know it. You guys were friends long before you started dating. Just go talk to her,” Castiel snapped. “I’m sick of you guys dancing around each other. Just go talk to her!”

Charlie’s mouth opened as if she were going to say something, but then she quickly shut it as if she thought it better just not to say anything.

Castiel pointed his finger at Jo. “Go talk to her now or so help me, I won’t talk to you anymore!”

Charlie walked away like a dog with its tail between its legs towards Jo.

For the next few minutes, Castiel watched the interaction from across the store. Jo was slow to accept Charlie’s presence, but by the end, Charlie must have said something right because Jo hugged her.

_ Thank God that’s over. _

Of course, Castiel knew there was still a lot of healing that had to happen, but at least they could now be in the same room together without one of them crying.

After making his purchase, Castiel headed back to his room. Unfortunately, he was sharing his room with Andy, but he knew that Andy would leave him alone, so it wasn’t that big of a deal.

As Castiel entered the room, he knocked. “Andy? You decent?”

There was no answer, so Castiel assumed that meant he was either in the bathroom or not in the room. Thankfully, the room was empty.  _ Walking in on him doing something would be awkward. _

Once Castiel finished putting the shirt in his bag, he hopped on the bed and took out his cell phone again.

**Castiel: Why are you so far away?**

**Dean: Do you want to go to Disney Springs now rather than later?**

**Castiel: Jo pointed out to me that I can’t just leave whenever I want. I have to ask permission first.**

**Dean: Oh… yeah, forgot about that. I’m sure Ellen would be okay with you disappearing with me. Some of the students will be doing that with their parents during this trip, so it shouldn’t matter much.**

**Castiel: Yeah, but that’s with parents. You’re my boyfriend. There’s a difference.**

**Dean: I’ll text Ellen. Give me a second.**

About twenty minutes and ten games of solitaire later, Dean finally got back to him.

**Dean: She said as long as I come and get you, she doesn’t care. What room are you in?**

Around forty minutes later there was a knock at his hotel room door. When Castiel opened the door, Dean was waiting for him with a bouquet of Mickey Mouse lollipops.

Castiel couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re adorable. Thank you,” he said as he took the lollipop bouquet into his hand. “Come in.”

Once the door was closed, Dean flipped the deadbolt on to the door, then leaned up against it. He gave Cas a once over, licking first his top then his bottom lip as he soaked up every inch of Castiel.

Castiel bit his bottom lip trying to conceal the smile that was threatening to spread across his face. “What?”

“Nothing. I’m just the luckiest fucker in the world.”

Try as he might, Castiel couldn’t conceal it any longer. He beamed at his boyfriend. “Well, I’m pretty fucking lucky too,” he said as he turned towards his luggage.

As Castiel was turned around, Dean came up from behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist. He trailed small kisses along his neck.

“I have a roommate I have to worry about,” Castiel chastised halfheartedly.

“Shh,” Dean whispered as his hands moved down to the fly of Castiel’s pants and unzipped them. “I owe you an orgasm.”

Castiel swallowed hard. “Since when are we keeping count?”

Dean’s hand slipped into Cas’ boxers and grabbed hold of his achingly hard cock. He slowly began to stroke Castiel’s length.

Castiel’s head fell back as Dean’s skillful hands began to work their magic. One hand was under his shirt teasing his nipples. The other was stroking Castiel perfectly.

“I need you,” Dean murmured in Castiel’s ear.

“You have me.”

Dean’s strong hands fell away from Castiel as he rounded Cas and dropped to his knees in front of him. He kissed each hip bone, then took Castiel’s dick into his wet and inviting mouth.

Both of Castiel’s hands landed in Dean’s hair as he gingerly started to thrust into his mouth. Dean always took him so well. No matter how deep he would go, Dean would always accept him. His gag reflex was close to nonexistent.

“Feels so good,” Castiel moaned.

Dean released Castiel’s dick with a satisfying pop. “You taste so good, angel,” he said as his tongue lapped at the tip of Cas’ length.

“You take me so well. God, I wish I could fuck you right now,” Castiel groaned.

Dean’s delicious tongue licked Castiel from the base to the tip of his cock. “What’s stopping you?” he questioned before he once again took him into his mouth.

“Oh, fuck!” Castiel exclaimed. He looked down at Dean and saw him releasing his own cock from the confines of his jeans. “Fuck, yes! Touch yourself.”

Castiel watched, enthralled by Dean’s beauty. It wasn’t long before he felt the simmering in his gut of an impending orgasm. “Shit, I’m close.”

Dean picked up his pace, pulling out every trick in the book he knew would get Castiel there. Within a minute, Castiel was cumming deep into the back of Dean’s throat.

As usual, Dean sucked Castiel through his orgasm until he was shivering with oversensitivity. Castiel nearly fell to the floor when Dean was done with him.

When Dean finished with Castiel he stood up, still stroking his hard cock.

“You didn’t cum?” Castiel asked with a pout.

Dean shrugged, his dick still in his hand. “I owed you an orgasm.”

“Now, I owe you one,” Castiel said as he fell to his knees.

“Dude, why is the deadbolt on?” Andy asked as he tried to enter the room.

Castiel and Dean scrambled to put themselves back together.

“Are you in there with someone? You could get us into trouble, man!”

“Just one fucking second, Andy! Jesus!” Castiel retorted. When he was finally situated, he removed the deadbolt from the door.

Andy entered. When he saw Dean, a smirk spread across his face. “I fucking knew it.”

“You know nothing,” Castiel growled.

“Dude, basically everyone knows. Have you not seen the way you two stare at each other?”

Dean scrubbed a hand down his face. “Who else knows?”

“Basically the entire band has been saying you two have been dating since at least October. You were all over each other at Hofstra.”

“Fuck…”

“So…” Andy paused, moving his finger back and forth between the two of them. “Since October?”

“End of November,” Castiel corrected automatically.

“Dude, he was still a teacher!”

Castiel shrugged. “Shit happens.”

Dean sat at the end of one of the beds with his head in his hands. “My life is over.”

“Look,” Andy began, “it was all hearsay. The drumline jokes around about it. We didn’t have any substantial evidence or anything. We just saw the way you two looked at each other and ran with it. Plus, someone said they could have sworn they saw you two together on Black Friday at Island 16. Everyone went nuts with that one.”

“See, Cas. This is why I said low profile,” Dean snapped.

“It wasn’t him who gave you two away, Mr. Winchester,” Andy explained. “You’re the one who turned into a completely different person whenever he was around.”

“Fuck my life,” Dean said as he threw his head in his hands.

“So, everyone in the marching band knows?” Castiel inquired.

Andy shrugged. “Yeah. Like I said, most of them assumed something was going on.”

“Perfect,” Dean muttered.

“Dean, Crowley knows, the marching band knows, and a few of the teachers know. None of them have done anything about it. Plus, you don’t teach at the school anymore. Why are you freaking out about this?”

“Crowley thinks this didn’t start until after I finished the semester. The teachers, well, there is a relationship of trust involved with them. I don’t know this guy,” Dean said as he hooked his thumb at Andy. “Who’s to say he won’t say something and ruin everything?”

Castiel threw his hands up. “Dean, it’s been months. No one is going to do anything. Alastair tried to get you in trouble and that monster usually succeeds with everything. He failed.”

“Your point?” Dean snapped.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “My point is, nothing is going to happen. One more person knowing is not going to bring forth the end of the world.”

Dean glared at Andy. “Do you swear to keep your mouth shut?”

Andy put his pinky out. “Pinky swear, man.”

Dean and Castiel looked at each other with matching puzzled expressions.

“Pinky swear?” Castiel questioned.

“Hey, this shit is legit!” Andy said as he shook his hand, waiting for someone to take his pinky.

It took Castiel a moment to think it through. Not once had Andy done something to betray him. The guy was a little baked, but he wouldn’t have chosen him as a roommate if he thought he had any ill will towards him. Slowly, Castiel grasped Andy’s pinky with his own. “I trust him.”

A massive smile split across Andy’s face. “Sweet.”

“Don’t make me regret it, Andy,” Castiel warned.

“I swear, man. Your secret is safe with me,” Andy promised as he took back his hand.

Dean stood up and put his hands in his pockets. “Are we going to Disney Springs or what?”

Castiel nodded his head. He faced Andy one more time putting a hand on his shoulder. “Thank you, Andy.”

“No problem.”

“Yeah, Thanks,” Dean mumbled then left the room.

_ Great. He’s going to be in one of those moods now. _

 

>>>>>>

 

“Stop thinking, Dean! You’re freaking me out!” Cas implored as he followed him toward the bus terminal. “You only make faces like that when you’re rethinking everything.” He grasped Dean’s hand to stop him.

Dean didn’t look back as he began to spout his usual string of lies. “I’m fine. Stop worrying.”

“Don’t give me that bullshit.”

“Really. I’m okay.”

“Look at me.”

Dean opened his eyes wide and stared at Cas sarcastically. “Well, I’m looking at ya! What?”

Cas fixed him with a glare. “Don’t play games with me, Dean.”

Dean swallowed hard. “I’m not.”

Within a step, Cas was in Dean’s personal space. “Do you love me?”

“What kind of questi…”

“Answer me,” Cas snapped.

“Of course, I do.”

Cas’ eyes searched Dean’s face. “Say it.”

“Say what?”

“That you love me.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “You’re making a …”

“No. I’m not,” Cas retorted. His voice dropping an octave.

“I love you.”

Cas gave him a once-over, then cocked an eyebrow at Dean. “Now, since I have your attention, listen to me.”

Dean nodded.

“Vice Principal Crowley, Ms. Harvelle, Mr. Turner, and Mr. Davies all know about us. Everyone who could or would have done something about us all knows and have kept it to themselves. Plus, you are no longer employed at the high school. You no longer hold a position of authority over me. If anyone finds out we’re together, they would be told what Crowley thinks, which is we started dating at the beginning of January.” Cas cupped Dean’s face and smiled. “Now, we’re going to go to Disney Springs together and that’s final.”

“Cas…”

“Dean! We’re in Disney World for fuck's sake! Can we just have fun and forget about everything for once? Please?”

Dean took a deep breath. He was acting like an insecure child again. They had been through the risks of being together hundreds of times. Technically, Cas was right. There was hardly a risk of something happening to him anymore. The fact that Crowley knew alone should have calmed him down, but he couldn’t help this nagging feeling that their relationship’s beginnings would be an issue eventually.

After taking one final deep breath, Dean wrapped his arms around Cas. He kissed his head, then squeezed him tight. “I’m sorry.”

Dean could feel Cas’ entire body relax.

“I overthink things. You know me.”

Cas let out a deep breath. “I know.”

“Let’s go to Disney Springs,” Dean said with a smile.

The bus ride to the what Dean could only equate to an outlet mall was filled with comfortable silence. All thoughts of their earlier disagreement were forgotten. They wandered around for about an hour before they decided to stop at a D-Luxe burger.

“We could always go bowling,” Dean suggested as they ate their burgers and he reviewed the map of Disney Springs on his phone.

Cas started to laugh. “I can’t remember the last time I went bowling.”

“Were you any good?”

That only made Cas laugh harder. “I was terrible. I think the highest score I ever got was one twenty-one.”

“That’s not horrible.”

“That was with bumpers,”

Dean had to mirror his laugh with a cough. “Still, not horrible.”

“Abysmal is closer to the truth.”

Dean rolled his eyes, then went back to looking at the map. “Well, Splitsville is off the table. How about a movie?” he asked with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle.

“We could go see  _ Winchester _ ,” Cas recommended with a wink.

“Haha,” Dean said sarcastically.

Cas wiped his hands, then took out his cellphone. “ _ Peter Rabbit _ just came out two days ago.”

“So did  _ Fifty Shades.” _

“Fuck no.”

“Well,  _ Black Panther _ isn’t coming out until next week. So, pick something.”

Once they finally did decide on a movie,  _ Winchester _ , Cas and Dean walked to the theater, purchased their tickets and their goodies, then went to find their seats. The movie theater wasn’t any different than the millions of other movie theaters in the country. Unfortunately, there weren’t any lounge chairs, but Dean was fine with that.

When the movie was finally starting, Cas lifted the armrest between them and leaned into Dean. Considering how the night began, this was perfect. This was all he needed. Who cared if someone else found out about them? He was proud to be Castiel’s boyfriend.

Once the movie was finished, Dean and Cas walked back to the buses, hand-in-hand.

Cas squeezed Dean’s hand and put his head on Dean’s shoulder as they walked. “I wish you could spend the night.”

“You could always come back to my room. I’ll bring you back in the morning.”

Cas kissed Dean’s cheek. “No. It’s okay. We have an early morning tomorrow. We’re going to EPCOT tomorrow. From what I remember of the park, it’s my favorite.”

“Well, I’ve always wanted to drink around the world,” Dean said with a grin.

“Dean.”

“Castiel.”

Cas rounded him, still holding his hand. “Don’t drink the day away.”

“I won’t. I just want to try a few of the drinks. Plus, there is always dinner tomorrow.”

Cas gave Dean a perplexed expression. “What is for dinner tomorrow?”

Dean shot Cas a crooked smile as he rubbed the nape of his neck. “Uh, I kinda made reservations at Chefs de France. I figured we’d have a nice meal. Then we’d go back to my room.”

A face-splitting grin lit up Cas’ entire face. “Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day.”

Dean nodded.

Cas grabbed Dean by the shirt crashing their lips together. They received a few wolf whistles from passersby, but Dean didn’t care. Right now it was just the two of them. No one else existed. When Cas broke the kiss, he placed another one on Dean’s cheek. “I love you.”

“You’re not upset that I ignored your ‘No Valentine’s Day’ rule?”

Cas smacked Dean in the arm. “Are you kidding me?! I’m ecstatic you ignored it!”

Dean beamed at Cas. “Awesome!” he exclaimed, then gave Cas a quick peck on the lips. “Let’s get you back to your room before people start to worry about you.”

As soon as they arrived at Cas’ room, Dean didn’t want to leave. “I wish I could join you.”

“Mr. Winchester,” Cas said as he put a hand over his heart feigning offense.

Dean crowded Cas up against the door. “You know you want me.”

Cas’ breath hitched as Dean ground his hips against Cas. “I always want you.”

Dean placed a searing kiss on Cas lips, then backed away.

Cas’ entire body shivered with unbridled want. “Ugh, you asshole.”

“You love me.”

Cas gave him a coy smile. “Yes. I do.”

Eventually, Cas had to open the door and say goodnight. They kissed briefly once more before Cas shut the door behind him. Dean walked back to the buses. He knew he had a long journey back to his hotel, but he couldn’t find a reason to care. Knowing he made Cas happy meant the world to him.

_ Tomorrow is going to be awesome. _


	54. Chapter Fifty-Four

The next morning, Castiel woke up exhausted. The bed was horrible. There was an enormous lump in the middle of the mattress that made it impossible to find a comfortable spot. After taking care of his morning bathroom routine, Castiel went to his suitcase and grabbed the red, white, and black garbs of his marching band uniform. Unfortunately, he knew he would be wearing these for the entirety of the trip.  _ This thing is going to need some significant dry cleaning after tomorrow. _

The trip to Disney involved three events. The first day was performing in EPCOT. The next day was performing in Hollywood Studios. Then, finally, they would march in the Magic Kingdom. Three days, three parks. Every day they were scheduled at a particular time, so other than that, they really had free reign of the parks.

EPCOT was precisely the way Castiel remembered. The giant ball greeted them as soon as they entered the park. One of his favorite rides in the park was housed inside that giant ball — Spaceship Earth. Unfortunately, the line was enormous, so there was no way he would be riding it as soon as he entered the park.

As soon as Castiel was under the ball, he took out his cell phone to text Dean. A group of them had already got their selfie in front of the ball, but Castiel was dying to have one with his boyfriend, mainly since it was Valentine’s Day.

Just as Castiel was typing out his text, two hands covered his eyes. “Guess who.”

Castiel would know that voice anywhere. He turned around and wrapped his arms around Dean. “I was just messaging you.”

Dean kissed his cheek, then released him. “Not to be creepy or anything, but I kinda knew where you were as soon as you entered the park. I got here early. I’ve been waiting for you.”

Castiel smacked his arm. “Why didn’t you tell me you were here?” He grabbed the same arm he smacked and led him towards the front of the park leaving the group of his friends behind them. “Meet us at Starbucks,” he yelled back at them, hoping they heard him.

“Why are we heading towards the exit?”

“Because I want my corny picture of us in front of the ball!”

Dean laughed. “Whatever you want.”

Once they were in the perfect spot, Castiel went to the camera in his phone and set it on selfie mode. He smiled at the camera before Dean grabbed both sides of his face and kissed him completely messing up the picture.

“Dean,” Castiel chuckled against Dean’s lips.

Dean broke the kiss and looked at the photo Cas had snapped. “It’s perfect.”

Castiel looked at the picture and smiled. It really was perfect. Both of them were smiling into the kiss and the ball was still visible in the background. “I love you,” he uttered as he continued to marvel at the picture.

“Not as much as I love you. Now,” Dean began as he clapped his hands together, “where are we off to first?”

“Well, first Starbucks for coffee, then I figured Test Track.”

“Oooh, they have Chevy merch there!” Dean exclaimed.

Castiel shook his head as he rolled his eyes. “Yes, Dean, that is exactly why I want to go on that ride.”

“Shut up! Gotta show my Chevy pride for my baby.”

Castiel once again rolled his eyes, then said, “Anyway. Coffee?”

“Yeah, I could go for some five-bucks.”

“Five-bucks?”

“You can never go into Starbucks without spending close to five dollars for whatever you’re getting, especially in a Disney park.”

Castiel thought about all of the Starbucks he had ever purchased and Dean was utterly right. “Hmm… five-bucks. I’m using that.”

Dean shrugged. “Go for it.”

Luckily, everyone did hear him when he yelled Starbucks. Jo and Charlie were waiting for Castiel and Dean outside.

“Where’s Sam?” Dean asked.

“Already inside with Max and Alicia,” Charlie replied. “He said since the line was so long we should probably have someone inside waiting.”

“Max and Alicia agreed, plus, Max said he needed coffee asap, so they went in with him,” Jo added.

Alicia exited the building. “We’re next.”

After placing their order, all of them headed over to Test Track. It was early enough that the line wasn’t too long, but they still had to take two cars because there were too many people in their group to fit into one. Before they entered the vehicle, they were put into a room with at least forty computers waiting for them to design a car.

Dean held up his hands to stop Sam and Castiel. “Alright, you guys, stand back. Let the master show you how it’s done.” He wasn’t wrong, throughout the entire ride, Dean’s car was in first for all four of the categories available. Then, before they entered the car showroom, a giant screen displayed that his car was the best creation of the day. “Yeah, that’s right,” he said, dusting off his shoulder.

“Hey, our car did just as well!” Charlie huffed.

“Let it go, Charlie. We lost by like fifty points,” Jo said as she pointed at the screen.

“Yeah, you heard her. You gotta be like Elsa. Just let it go,” Dean mocked.

Jo and Castiel had to hold Charlie back from attacking Dean while Sam stood on the sidelines with Alicia and Max laughing hysterically.

Thankfully, Jo and Charlie were getting along great. Castiel always knew that they would eventually be friends again, but considering they just made up the day before their behavior was surprisingly warm towards one another.

When the International Showcase opened up at eleven, everyone started to make their way to the back of the park.

Dean looked down at his cell phone, then said, “I have to go.”

Castiel’s face fell. “Why?”

“I have to go help bring in all of the equipment and instruments from the bus,” Dean explained.

Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean and placed a chaste kiss on his lips. “I’ll go with you,” he offered.

Dean adamantly shook his head. “No. Stay with your friends.”

“But it’s Valentine’s Day. We should be together,” Cas pleaded.

“Unfortunately, I did come here with some responsibilities in mind. I may no longer work at the school, but I committed when I decided to come here. We’ll be together tonight. I promise you that.”

Even though Castiel wanted Dean to stay with him, he knew he was only delaying the inevitable. “Okay.”

“I promise you after everything is back on the bus, you and I will be together.”

“You swear?”

Dean gave him a coy smile. “Nothing can keep me from you tonight. We have plans.”

With a final kiss, they parted ways. Dean was heading towards the front and Cas following his group of friends towards the showcase.

Charlie wrapped her arm around him. “Don’t worry. We’ll see him in about two hours. Time will fly by.

She wasn’t wrong. The group of them decided to start in Mexico because that was the country they were closest to and continued their journey from there.

Mexico was filled with merchandise for  _ Coco _ . Even though the movie had been out in theaters since November, Castiel had yet to see it. Usually, he waited to watch Disney movies at home with his little sister. From what he heard it was incredible, but there are hardly any bad Disney movies, so that’s not surprising.

After they left Mexico, they went to Norway. The line for the  _ Frozen _ ride was astronomically long. As if to mock the people waiting, the sign above the entrance displayed a wait time of one hundred twenty-five minutes.

“That’s just plain ridiculous!” Charlie yelled. “Who has time to wait that long?”

“Not us,” Sam answered. “Let’s go to China. That’s the next country on the map.”

Surprisingly, China was not filled with  _ Mulan _ merchandise. Unlike Norway, which was filled with  _ Frozen _ , China had a lot more cultural merchandise and a fascinating museum about the new parks they’re developing.

By the time they were finished in China, Jo’s alarm had gone off on her phone signaling it was time to head towards the United States pavilion.

 

>>>>>>

 

Waking up well rested but lonely was awful. Usually, Dean’s mornings were filled with lazy kisses and shy smiles. The past two mornings, he had to wake up alone in his bed. Something that, even though he hated to admit it, bothered him. Nothing was better than waking up next to the man he loved. Still, he knew tonight he would be going to sleep in the same bed as Castiel, so that made up for some of his loneliness.

The alarm clock woke Dean up just before eight. He took a quick shower, got dressed, then headed towards the bus terminal near his room. He knew he was going to be earlier than what Cas’ texts suggested, but he didn’t care. He was in Disney World. He was going to squeeze every bit of time he had out of the day, especially once he was with Cas.

It was a glorious day. The weather was perfect. The sun was peeking through the clouds, warming up the morning. If he were in New York, the weather would have been bleak, but the sunshine state wouldn’t let him down today.

Since he was staying at a different hotel than the rest of the teachers and students, Dean had to take the bus supplied by the hotels like he did yesterday. Just when he was about to take his seat, his phone started to ring.

“Hey, Ellen. What’s up?”

“ _ Just another stressful day in the music department. Did you get my text? _ ”

“Uh… No. I didn’t. What’s up?”

“ _ Okay… Well, you know how everyone is performing at one at the United States pavilion? _ ”

“Yeah?”

“ _ I need you to help us unload the busses when the World Showcase opens. None of the students will be taking their instruments or equipment into the parks with them this morning, so I need your help. _ ”

_ Fuck… _

“ _ You still there? _ ”

“Yeah, I’m still here. It’s just how long are you going to need me? You know I have plans tonight.”

“ _ Oh, definitely not that long. Probably from eleven to three. _ ”

_ That’s plenty of time before your reservation. _ “My reservation is at 6:30 tonight, so that definitely works for me.”

“ _ Perfect! You are a lifesaver. It would have been a nightmare without you. I’ll see you around eleven at the front of the park. _ ”

“See you soon.”

After the call disconnected, Dean took a second to think about what he just agreed to. That was four hours away from Cas on a pretty important holiday. Still, he knew what he was signing up for when he decided to come down to Florida with the school.  _ I’m spending a pretty fucking penny on a trip where it looks like I’ll be working more than spending time with my boyfriend. _

When he got to the park, the line to go through security was ridiculous. Luckily, since he had no bag, he was able to go through one of the metal detectors and call it a day. He had a slightly embarrassing moment trying to get into the park. He didn’t realize it was a two-step process to enter the park. He thought he could just scan his wristband and enter. One of the people stationed at the sensors had to explain to him that they needed his fingerprint, too. After that situation, Dean sat down near one of the fountains to wait for Cas. It was right in front of the globe, so he wasn’t too far away from where Cas actually wanted to meet, which was under the ball.

Before Cas even realized Dean was there, Dean saw him. The smile he was wearing could have lit up the night. It had been a while since Dean had seen Cas so happy.  _ New York City was the last time he smiled like that. I need to make sure he smiles more. He’s so gorgeous. _

As Dean approached Cas, he made sure Cas wasn’t looking because he wanted to surprise him. Thankfully, Cas took out his phone, so he was able to sneak up behind him and cover his eyes. “Guess who.” Dean could feel when the already present smile widened on Cas’ face.  _ He’s gummy smiling for me _ , he thought, then melted a bit.

Cas turned around almost instantly after that and wrapped his arms around Dean. “I was just messaging you.”

Dean kissed his cheek, then released him. “Not to be creepy or anything, but I kinda knew where you were as soon as you entered the park. I got here early. I’ve been waiting for you.”

Castiel smacked his arm. “Why didn’t you tell me you were here?” Then, he grabbed him by the same arm leading him away from the ball. “Meet us at Starbucks,” he hollered over his shoulder as they continued to walk.

“Why are we heading towards the exit?”

“Because I want my corny picture of us in front of the ball!” Cas exclaimed. His face hardened with determination.

Dean laughed. “Whatever you want.”

As soon as they were in front of the ball, Cas started scoping out the right spot. Once it was found, Cas took out his cell phone again and lined up the shot.

Dean knew Cas was looking for the perfect picture, but he had yet to kiss him that day. He grabbed both sides of his face and planted a kiss on Cas’ lips.

“Dean,” Castiel chuckled against Dean’s lips.

Once Dean was sure Cas captured the picture he broke the kiss and looked at the shot. “It’s perfect.” They were both smiling as they kissed and Cas’ beloved ball was still in the shot.

Dean’s favorite gummy smile spread across Cas’ face. “I love you.”

“Not as much as I love you,” Dean replied with all sincerity. “Now,” Dean said as he clapped his hands together, “where are we off to first?”

After morning coffee, Max, Alicia, Sam, Charlie, Jo, Dean, and Cas, all headed over to Test Track. Dean secretly knew he was going to enjoy this ride the most because he did a bit of research ahead of time. He didn’t end up buying any Chevy merchandise, but the picture he had in his cell phone showing his car was the best of the day was souvenir enough.

Unfortunately, the line for Test Track took up most of the morning, so when they finished in the gift shop, Dean had to say goodbye. It didn’t take a genius to figure out how disappointed Cas was, but Dean had a job to do.

When Dean made it to the front of the park, Ellen was there waiting with the rest of the teachers. Well, everyone but Rufus.

“Where’s Rufus?” Dean asked out of concern.

“Bathroom,” Ellen and Mick answered in unison.

“Ah,” Dean replied.

“We have a schedule to adhere to, Ellen,” Ms. Upír began. “We’ve already been delayed by Mr. Winchester here. Must we do the same thing for Rufus?”

“Lenore, we’ve been through this. A schedule during something like this is more of a guideline of what we have to do. We have about two hours to unload everything.”

“Yes. I understand that, but Naomi was pretty adamant that we should all be at guest relations by eleven,” Ms. Upír explained.

“And we shall explain to the park liaison that we were delayed by a team member. We go as a group or not at all,” Ellen growled.

“What did I miss?” Rufus inquired as he approached the group.

“Bloody Christ, mate. Get your bowels checked! That’s the second time this morning!” Mick exclaimed.

“If you must know, it’s my prostate. Not my bowels,” Rufus informed much to everyone’s chagrin. “Thing is the size of a fucking orange.”

Ellen’s eyes widened exponentially. “Rufus! Go to the fucking doctor!”

Rufus simply waved her off, then asked, “So, where are we meeting this woman again?”

Ms. Upír looked at her watch. “We were supposed to meet her at guest services almost ten minutes ago.”

“I’m sure Naomi will understand,” Ellen stated.

As they approached guest services, it was clear that Naomi didn’t understand. Her smile said one thing, but her stature stated another. Her entire being screamed woman in charge. From her power suit to her perfect hair, this woman was clearly used to getting what she wanted and the group of them were not adhering to her schedule.

“Which of you is Ms. Harvelle?” Naomi inquired.

Ellen held out her hand. “Just call me Ellen.”

Naomi took the proffered hand and shook it. “Hello, Ellen. As you know I am Naomi Majors; I will be your liaison to the parks during your stay here at Disney World. I would appreciate in the future that you arrive at your scheduled time. We have a lot to do and only a limited amount of time to do it.”

_ Knew she was pissed. _

“It won’t happen again,” Ellen promised.

“I should hope not,” Naomi said, then quickly made a beeline in the direction of the park. “Follow me. Again, plenty to do.”

The rest of the morning was spent unloading the buses, then taking a cart behind the scenes to the United States pavilion. Thankfully, the students and other teachers had already organized a vast majority of the stuff on the bus, so unloading was reasonably straightforward.

Time flew by. Before Dean knew it, students began to show up to pick up their instruments. First to perform was the band, then the Kickline/Colorguard team had their own number to perform, followed by the orchestra. Many of the students were excited at the prospect of performing in front of the entire park. Others were disappointed that their adventures were cut short to perform for the park. Either way, Dean was able to mark down every student in his packet as there, including Cas.

Cas seemed to be nervous as always. Not as much as he was at Hofstra, but tense enough that Dean was yearning to hold him and make sure he was okay.  _ Who are you kidding? You’d want to hold him even if he wasn’t nervous. _

When Dean approached Cas, he didn’t even bother to maintain distance. He went right up to him and hugged him. “Are you okay, angel?”

Cas squeezed him a little tighter than usual, then released him. “Aren’t you afraid of others seeing us?”

Dean shrugged. “As you said, everyone knows. I want to make sure you’re okay.”

Cas gave him a shy smile. “You trying to score bonus points with me, Mr. Winchester?”

“Nah. I’ll save that for later,” Dean replied with a wink.

The gummy smile he received in response was enough to light up his entire day.

“Go line up. You’re supposed to perform soon.” Dean pushed Cas in the direction of the stage and grinned.  _ I love him. _

While the band was on stage, Dean stood on the sidelines praising and cheering on the students he worked with the first half of the school year. Of course, he screamed a little louder and clapped a little harder for Cas, but to him, that was to be expected.

Jo came and stood next to him when they were on their second song. “So, do you plan on putting a ring on it?”

Dean almost jumped out of his skin. “He’s only eighteen!”

“So?”

Dean ignored the question and changed the subject. “So? You and Charlie seem to be buddies again. What happened there?”

“We’ve been friends since were in the fourth grade. We may not have worked out as a couple, but I’m not losing that many years of friendship because of that.”

“I’m happy you two are friends again. I couldn’t stand seeing you two miserable.”

Jo simply shrugged. “Still, what she did can never be forgiven.”

Before he could second guess himself, Dean said, “Not to sound like Ross or anything, but the two of you were on a break. She didn’t know you had changed your mind.”

“Yeah, but she should have known better,” Jo snapped.

Dean held up both of his hands in surrender. “Look, I’m not taking sides.”

“Sure sounds like you are,” Jo grumbled.

“All I’m saying is it takes two to tango and neither of you is innocent.”

Jo rolled her eyes. “Whatever.”

Dean shook his head. “So, what do you plan on doing after this?”

“We were thinking about heading back to Germany. We had to run over here after finishing in China, so we figured we’d go back there. Will you be joining us?” Jo asked.

“I won’t be finished here until around three. I probably won’t even be able to see Sammy perform because I’m going to be loading everything back on to carts to take back to the buses.”

Jo made a stink face. “You’re not getting paid to do all of this. Why are you doing it?”

“I was asked to come on this trip to help. Plus, it doesn’t hurt to have professional references who can tell people I did something like this without pay.”

“I guess,” Jo said with a shrug.

After the band was finished, they had ten minutes to set everything up for the girls. At that moment, Dean couldn’t have been happier that the entire band was unable to come on the trip. The line that formed to return instruments to him was immense. Luckily, Mick must have noticed he was drowning in students because he came over to help while the other teachers helped organize the stage for the Kickline/Colorguard.

Most of their performance was spent reorganizing everything. Cas and Sammy joined in with organizing everything the way it had been before the students had arrived along with a handful of other students. When everything was finished being assembled, it was time for the orchestra to perform. Thankfully, Dean was able to see Sam perform one song with the orchestra before he had to go back to piling more equipment onto another cart.

As soon as the orchestra finished playing, it was right back to collect instruments again. This time Lenore was the one to help him with the students. Once everything was packed up and in order, Dean took a seat at the edge of the stage to take a break.

“When do you think you’ll be finished?” Cas asked.

Dean looked at the clock on his phone and grimaced.  _ There is no way we are finishing by three. _ “Ellen said three, but at this point, I’m thinking closer to four.”

Cas’ face fell as he sat down next to Dean. “Is this the way it’s going to be every day?”

Dean nodded. “Unfortunately, yes.”

Cas nodded in response.

“I’ll text you when I’m finished. We’ll meet up somewhere.”

Cas nodded once again. “Maybe we can meet up in Japan. By the time you’re done, we’ll probably be in that pavilion.”

“We’ll see. Hopefully, I’ll be finished sooner rather than later.” Dean stood up and went over to one of the carts. “See you soon.”

“Of course,” Cas said with a smile that didn’t meet his eyes.

“Everything okay?” Dean inquired.

“I just miss you, I guess,” Cas said with a shrug.

“Give me an hour and I’ll be by your side.”

Cas nodded his head one final time, then followed the rest of his group back to the other countries.

_ This fucking sucks. _


	55. Chapter Fifty-Five

“What’s got you in such a foul mood?” Charlie asked as she perused the stuffed animals in Germany.

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “What?”

“I just asked you if this stuffed squirrel was adorable and you grunted at me,” Charlie explained.

From the moment he stepped into the store, Castiel had been following everyone in relative silence. “I wouldn’t say my mood is foul. More along the lines of sluggish or melancholic.”

“Then lighten up, Cas,” Jo interjected as she leaned in close to Charlie. “That squirrel is adorable. Its tail is so fluffy.”

Charlie’s face flushed as she rubbed the tail against Jo’s cheek. “You think?”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Get a room,” he mumbled as he walked away from the two of them.

Sam approached him with a smile. “They’re so obvious. It’s adorable,” he whispered.

“Yeah.”

“You know, he’s probably just as miserable as you are right now. He really wanted today to be special,” Sam divulged.

Castiel nodded his head. “This is why I didn’t want to get my hopes up about today.”

“Don’t you have plans tonight?” Sam asked.

“Yeah. We have reservations at Chefs de France. Then I’m spending the night at his hotel,” Castiel replied.

“See! Today hasn’t even begun for the two of you. You’re going to have plenty of time together.”

“I know,” Castiel began, “but I just… I thought this trip was going to be different,” he admitted. “I thought he and I would be able to have a little vacation together. Not me having a vacation and him working.”

“Cas, you knew he was coming down here to work.”

“I know.”

“So, try to make the best of the hours apart and come look at cuckoo clocks with us.”

From that moment on, Castiel really tried. Eventually, he started to feel that Disney magic and joy that everyone talks about when they go to Disney World. He had a giant pretzel in Germany and bought caramel popcorn.

Next, they were on their way to Italy. The Venetian masks were gorgeous. Castiel was tempted to buy one of them, but they were hundreds of dollars. He could afford it if he wanted to, but he just didn’t feel like it was the most reasonable purchase.

By the time they were done in Italy, Castiel finally received a text from Dean asking him where they should meet. Castiel was quick to answer saying the United States pavilion. There wasn’t much to do in the United States, but he didn’t care. Dean was finally done for the day.

Less than fifteen minutes later, Dean showed up at the shop with sweat beading on his forehead.

“Did you run here?” Castiel questioned.

Dean just nodded as he tried to catch his breath. “I need to start working out again. That damn near killed me.”

Castiel shrugged. “I figured you were getting plenty of exercise.”

Dean chuckled. “You pounding me into every available surface is not enough exercise. At least not on my end.”

Castiel quickly surveyed the area to make sure no one was looking, then placed a quick yet heated kiss on Dean’s lips. “You’ll just have to ride me more often,” he whispered.

“Cas,” Dean groaned wantonly. “You can’t say shit like that!”

“Why not?” Castiel asked, feigning innocence. He knew exactly what he was doing and was enjoying every second of it.

“‘Cause, we’re in Epcot.”

“So?”

“So,” Dean began, “you realize I can literally do nothing to alleviate any… um… stress you may be causing either of us while we’re here.”

“There is always a darkened corner or a bathroom. Or even Spaceship Earth. I’m pretty su…”

“No, Cas! Since when are you an exhibitionist?” Dean questioned, an incredulous look on his face.

“Since yesterday,” Castiel deadpanned.

“The airplane?”

“Yes.”

Dean shook his head. “Of course.”

Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck with a smile. Dean’s hands automatically grasped Castiel’s hips “Come on. You know I wouldn’t do anything stupid like that at a Disney park. I’d like to come back here someday. Preferably when you’re not working.”

Dean’s gaze momentarily fell from Castiel’s. “I’m sorry, Cas. You know I would like nothing more than to spend every moment with you while we’re here, but I have responsibilities. I knew this wasn’t a vacation when I agreed to come down here. I wish it weren’t for as many hours a day, but at least we have the rest of the day together now.”

“Very true,” Castiel said with a nod.

“Now,” Dean said, grasping one of Castiel’s hands from behind his neck to hold it. “Let’s go have a little fun.

Even though Castiel had initially been with a group of his friends, they seemed to separate after Dean showed up. Knowing how upset he had been for most of the day, it wasn’t surprising that his friends wanted to give him the time he so obviously craved with his boyfriend. Charlie, Jo, and Sam all stayed within shouting distance, but Max and Alicia seemed to disappear at one point. He later found out it was because they had dinner reservations in Germany.

Japan was a lot of fun. All of them, with the exception of Max and Alicia, were lucky enough to catch a performance of the Matsuriza Drummers. Even though there was an enormous crowd, they were still able to see the three drummers wail on their drums.

From there, they went into the store. Compared to the rest of the pavilions of the park, Japan held more items he was familiar with. They had an entire section designated to  _ Pokémon _ . Another part was filled with Nintendo memorabilia. It was by far the coolest shop so far. Castiel ended up spending the most money in that shop. Between the candy he had bought himself and the stuff he had purchased for his family, he easily spent over a hundred dollars in Japan.

After they finished in Japan, they headed to Morocco. While Jo and Charlie played with the belly dancing garb, Dean was quick to place a fez on Sam’s head and call him Aladdin for the next five minutes. Sam actually didn’t look too bad in the hat.  _ He’s Dean’s brother. Their genetics have made it impossible to ever look weird in anything they wear. It makes me sick sometimes. _

Once they finished in Morocco, it was time for them to head to France, which was the next country in the showcase, for dinner. They parted ways with Charlie, Jo, and Sam at the entrance to Chefs de France.

Castiel was beyond excited to eat dinner with Dean. He grasped Dean’s hand as they walked inside the glass doors into the restaurant.

“Bonsoir, et bienvenue chez le Chefs de France,” the hostess greeted. “Do you have a reservation?” she asked with a thick French accent

“Yes,” Dean replied. “Two under the name of Winchester.”

The hostess smiled at the two of them before she looked down at her computer. “Ah. Yes. I have the reservation here for a Mr. Dean Winchester. Give me a moment. I need to make sure your table is ready.”

As soon as their table was ready, the hostess led the way. They were seated right by the window. It was not exactly ideal considering Castiel wanted to spend some private time with Dean and he knew everyone could see them if they were seated right by the window.

“Are there any tables away from the windows?” Dean asked, somehow reading Castiel’s mind.

“It is Valentine’s Day, Monsieur. Unfortunately, I do not have another table for you at this exact moment. You could wait if you’d like, but I cannot guarantee the next table will be away from the window.”

Dean nodded. “That’s fine. This table will do fine.”

After they took their seats, Castiel took a moment to observe his surroundings. The restaurant was gorgeous. Castiel had never been to France, but he had a feeling if he were to go to France, it would look just like this in Paris. He took a moment to look at Dean. “Are you okay?”

Dean looked entirely out of sorts. His entire stature had changed. “I’m not used to places like this, Cas.”

Dean grasped Dean’s hand across from the table. “I would have been happy eating a quick serve meal with the rest of the gang. You didn’t have to do this if it makes you feel uncomfortable.”

“I want tonight to be special for you. I’ll deal,” Dean said with a smile as he laced their fingers together.

“Bonsoir! Je suis Gaspard. Can I get you started with something to drink?” Gaspard inquired.

Dean spent all of five seconds looking at the menu before he put it down and asked, “What would you suggest?”

Gaspard listed off a few wines and specialty drinks before Dean took out his driver’s license and chose the one beer Gaspard had mentioned. Being underage, Castiel had no choice but to select a non-alcoholic drink. He decided to get the Orangina instead of going with a standard Coke product. After Gaspard had written down their drinks on his pad, he smiled at both of them and promised he would return soon.

“I have no idea what to get,” Dean fretted as he looked at the menu.

Castiel smiled at Dean. “You know tonight still would have been special if we went...”

Dean's glare silenced Castiel. “You’re gonna eat this frou-frou French food and you’re gonna like it.”

Castiel held his hands up in mock surrender, then went back to looking at the menu.

“Who the fuck eats snails?” Dean grumbled at the menu silently.

“Dean.”

“Sorry.”

When Gaspard returned, Dean once again asked him for his opinion on what he should get. Castiel already knew what he wanted. It had been a while since he had a decent piece of fish, so he planned on getting the Bisque de homard and the Filet de saumon mariné auvin blanc et citron. Or in English, lobster bisque and salmon marinated in white wine and lemon.

After playing eenie meanie miny moe on the menu, Dean eventually decided on soupe à l’oignon gratinée (french onion soup) and the filet de boeuf grillé (grilled tenderloin of beef).

Once Dean was done ordering, Gaspard smiled once again and walked away.

“Thirty-six dollars for a fucking piece of steak. It better come with a happy ending with that kind of pricing,” Dean griped as he took his first sip of beer.

“It does,” Castiel deadpanned.

Dean began to choke on his sip of beer. “What?!”

Castiel didn’t say a word. He just wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Dean’s grin was small but spoke of promise. “We may have a noise complaint on our hands later.”

“Oh, I hope so,” Castiel said as he took a drink of the Orangina.

Dean chuckled. “You’re adorable.”

Castiel beamed at Dean, then blew a kiss at him.

Once again Dean laughed. “Smart-ass.”

 

>>>>>>

 

Considering the restaurant was fancy as fuck, Dean was surprised so many people were dressed in jeans, shorts, and t-shirts.  _ It’s a fucking theme park, man. People don’t play dress-up just to come to a theme park. _

Dean looked down at the prices on the menu and nearly shit himself.  _ What the actual fuck?! How do people with kids come to places like this?! _

The aroma of everything that passed by to go to other tables, then eventually what was placed in front of them was utterly arousing. His olfactory sense was about to have a spontaneous orgasm. When he was finally able to taste his food, he was far from dissatisfied.

“Oh, my God! This is incredible!” Dean hummed over his bowl of soup. “You wanna try it?” he asked Cas, already pushing his bowl across the table without Cas saying yes.

“Would you like to taste mine as well? It’s phenomenal.”

As they shared each other’s soup, the most suggestive groans escaped them.

“Oh, dear God,” Cas said as he dug his spoon into Dean’s soup to get a taste of the gruyére cheese that was smothering the soup.

“I’m about to steal your soup,” Dean admitted.

Cas put a protective arm around his soup bowl as he chewed the cheese he finally freed from Dean’s bowl. “My soup.”

The rest of the meal carried out much of the same way. They shared everything. Dean would never call himself a fish eater, but Cas’ salmon was marinated to perfection.  _ Okay. I’m starting to get why they charge what they charge here. This is above and beyond tastier than anything else I have ever eaten. _

By the time Gaspard came to the table to ask about dessert, Dean and Cas were overly full.

“Mais Messieurs, dessert is the most important part of the meal. The crème brûlée est magnifique,” Gaspard said with an earnest smile.

“You know what, man, you haven’t steered me wrong this entire meal, so I’m gonna listen to you again. Bring us one to share, buddy.”

“Parfait!” Gaspard exclaimed as he walked away.

“I like him,” Cas said as their waiter walked away.

“Yeah. Me, too. He’s been a godsend this entire meal. Whoever said the French are rude never met him.”

“I know, right?!” Cas beamed.

Once again Gaspard worked his magic with the dessert choice. Dean and Cas were moaning around every spoonful of their crème brûlée. The crème was light and not overly sweet — just a hint of sugar. Then, paired with the delicious sugar topping.  _ I’m gonna jizz in my pants from this meal. _

Eventually, Gaspard brought over the bill. Dean grabbed it before Cas could take a look. It was around what he was expecting. Around one hundred twenty dollars. With tip, it was closer to one hundred fifty, but considering the service they received, Gaspard deserved and earned every cent of his tip.

“How much was it?” Cas asked as Gaspard grabbed the check folder.

“Don’t worry about it.”

Cas crossed his arms over his chest. “Dean?”

“Cas, seriously don’t worry about it. I make more than enough money to take care of dinner.”

Cas raised an eyebrow at Dean. “So… over a hundred?”

“I said don’t worry about it. Call it my Valentine’s Day gift to you. How about that?”

“Fine,” Cas sighed.

As soon as they were done paying, Dean and Cas walked outside hand-in-hand. Dean put his empty hand over his stomach and belched. “Fuck, I’m full.”

“Such a gentleman,” Cas said, shaking his head with a smile on his face.

“Don’t you forget it,” Dean said placing a lingering kiss on Cas’ lips.

“Where to next?” Cas asked.

Dean had no idea where to go. They hadn’t toured the rest of the countries yet. So, there was always that option. However, it had been a while since he had been in touch with Sam. “I’m gonna call Sam. See what he’s up to. If you’re okay with that.”

Cas’ eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Why wouldn’t I be okay with that?”

Dean shrugged. “It’s kinda our night now so, I don’t know.”

“Do you not want to call Sam?” Cas asked.

Dean looked down at his phone, then looked at Cas. Part of him didn’t want to call Sam. He knew if he called him, Sam would want to meet up with him. Still, he knew he should check up on his little brother. “I should call to at least check up on him,” he told Cas.

Cas laughed. “Just call him, assbutt.”

Sam picked up on the last ring. “ _ Hey, you guys done with dinner? _ ”

“Yup. Just finished.”

“ _ We’re all waiting on the line for Soarin. _ ”

“You finished the other countries already?”

“ _ Yeah. You’re gonna love England, man. Let me know what you think. _ ”

“Oh,” Dean said with more shock than he meant. “You don’t want to meet up or anything?”

“ _ Um, its Valentine’s Day, dude. Spend one of your favorite holidays with your boyfriend. I’ll be fine. So will everyone else. _ ”

“Awesome.”

Sam chuckled on the other end of the phone. “ _ Listen, I gotta go, we’re playing a game and I don’t want to miss any of the questions.” _

“Yeah. Sure. Go. Later, bitch.”

_ “Jerk. _ ”

Dean smiled as he hung up the phone. “Let’s go to England,” he said to Cas.

Sam couldn't have been more right about how Dean would feel about England if he tried. He and Cas nearly ran towards the sound of a band singing The Who _.  _ For the next twenty minutes, Cas and Dean sang along to some of Britain's classic rock hits.

From there, they went to a shop which basically held a plethora of rock band t-shirts, Monty Python, Sherlock, and Dr. Who memorabilia. After that, they entered another shop which had an actual suit of armor and different coat of arms hanging all over the walls. This shop continued into another one that had soccer balls and jerseys everywhere.  _ I almost forgot how much they love football over there. _

England also had a bar called the Rose and Crown. He went inside to see what it was like, but much to his disappointment, did not buy a beer. He didn’t want to keep drinking, especially since Cas couldn’t partake in a drink or two with him.

Canada also had live music. It was more folk music than anything else, but it was still cool. The shop had a lot of bears and moose. He was almost tempted to buy his moose of a brother a moose hat, but the price tag told him to hold off until maybe later on Amazon.

After walking around in the shop for a bit, they went to watch the movie about Canada. It was narrated by Martin Short and was actually pretty impressive.  _ I’d like to visit Canada someday. _

When they left Canada, they noticed everyone was starting to surround the giant lake in the middle of the park.  _ I’m assuming that the fireworks are going to be starting soon. _ Within a matter of seconds, an announcement sounded throughout the park that Epcot’s Reflections of Earth firework spectacular was about to begin.

Cas and Dean found a spot on the side with some difficulty, but thankfully, since both of them were tall, they were able to see over most people without an issue. In their search for a spot, they did actually end up running into the rest of the gang. Actually, they ran into a lot of students from the school.  _ Who cares if they see? Like Cas said, everyone who could and can do anything about it already knows. Plus, I would never give up what we have any more than he would. _

The fireworks were truly spectacular. More than once, they almost brought a tear to Dean’s eye. When they were finished, everyone started heading towards the front. At the busses, they waved goodbye to everyone else, then headed towards the sign that read “Wilderness Lodge.”

As they waited for the bus to come, Dean laced his fingers with Cas’ and smiled. The day may not have been perfect, but if everything from Japan on was any indication of what he could expect from the night, he knew he was in for something magnificent.


End file.
